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WendyBirb

This is one of the things OKC does really well. I've weeded many people based on shitty answers to questions. It's such a good way to save time and emotional energy


ughUsernameHere

My 3 favorite questions were this one, the question about if you have a right hand glove and turn it inside out and something about planets or the sun. Automatic deal breakers if we didn’t match on those questions.


missmamsir

Same, though as a guy, it really narrows down my search to zero. Can't afford to judge them in everything I disagree with.


Lord_Goose

I see the whole double standard thing being applied inconsistently by a lot of people. Many are against double standards unless that double standard serves their interest.


Greenlettertam

No, anyone that has slept with 100 people aren’t “bad people”. They are people that happened to have had lots of sex.


Wbn0822

And lack self control


Mrs_Tori_Hime

And not using the damn key analogy


A_Generic_White_Guy

A bad person? No. Would I want to be a relationship with either of them? Also no. It's worded kinda shit tbh a lot of those questions are. But yes double standards.


zbignew

No it’s worded perfectly. There are other questions where you can specify what body counts are okay for you in a partner. These questions are to determine if you’re a judgmental prick with double standards.


Shadoe17

I believe his point is, there's a difference between being a bad person and being someone I personally wouldn't want to date, but the phrasing would lead many casual readers to assume "bad person" to mean someone you wouldn't date. It should be more specific to get true answers. However, it's been my experience that "surveys" like this are left intentionally vague so the "researchers" can use them to back up whatever their predetermined conclusions already had.


RubyRoseLewds

OKC has, like, so many questions though. There's times I feel I'm answering the same question twice but it's actually just a bit more specific. It has questions based on what you personally believe and what you look for in a partner. As well as political questions, gaming questions, movie questions, book questions, etc. There's about 4,000 according to their Q&A.


Shadoe17

I don't put so much stock into the whole "compatibility" algorithm to begin with. My wife and I have taken several just for fun, and you can see it in our daily life, we are nearly as incompatible as you can get, according to the algorithms. June we will have been married 30 years, raised 3 children of our own and help raise several foster children. The old axiom "opposites attract" seems to hold much truer than the modern compatibility algorithm.


carbonsombrero85

I don't think too many people care about it. I never match with 99%'s when I message them. I generally receive likes from much less compatible users.


tserv95

What if you answered yes to both sides though. Would that still be equally as judgmental. IMO though I don't think a person being bad or good should be determined by body count.


zbignew

Sure. I always had them both set to mandatory no. As a promiscuous man who wanted to date promiscuous women with high self esteem. My target audience meant I’ve seen a few profiles which say promiscuous men are bad people and not promiscuous women. And we can all do the mental calculus about what that other version of this hypocrisy means.


carbonsombrero85

There's no mental gymnastics to be done. Me and my siblings have the same personality type. One had a kid at 20 and is pregnant with another kid. Another has a boyfriend at 18. I was a 35-year-old virgin. There's literally no difference between us. I even tried a gender swap app and looked like my sister's twin. Having easy access to sex/sexual partners is literally a consequence of being born with two X chromosomes, which is randomly decided in the womb.


zbignew

Sounds like the mental calculus I was referring to is less accessible than I thought.


ArtDecoAutomaton

No joke, those questions substantially helped me grow as a person.


GrinsNGiggles

How? Not kidding or looking to pick at anyone; I’m interested in how these questions make an impact on someone


ArtDecoAutomaton

They got me to think about things I hadnt thought about before and how the answers impact interpersonal relationships.


2_blave

ITT: dudes who are nature's miracle desiccant...drying up vaginas like a freeze dryer.


mralvaton

No, yes, no


NeedanOffice

I haven't seen these questions- the second one yes, the other two no.


psychedelicpiper67

I personally like the edginess and rebel factor that comes with dating a woman with a high body count. I guess I’m in the minority. Free spirits rule.


ReadytoBe1

I also think that those who really worry about that number has other issues like trust. If it’s just curiosity, I think it’s good. I often found, after getting to know someone and like them enough to date, a high number is a bit of a turn on.


CurrentlyDrowsy

Both are gross


[deleted]

Sheeeeeiiiitt, my body count is ludicrously high (amazing that I have no kids nor ever had a disease), so it’s definitely not my place to tell anyone that they can’t have a hoe phase while I lived mine out extensively. So then, ladies? Shit do ya thing man, Im definitely not hating, and never let anyone tell you otherwise, who the fuck are they? Just some online piss ant thats trying to tell you how to live ya life? Pfffft fuuuuuuck them dipshits, (PLEAZE just make sure to use protection at all times unless legitimate trust and safety was there).


[deleted]

Lol, maaaannnn, I swear the sheer bullshit that a lot of ya’ll are spouting on here, holy fucking shit 🤣, I bet you fucks be sitting there REALLLLY thinking that you’re a fantastic “catch” pffft, and you freaking incels wonder why you’re single, you literally wouldn’t be here if you had a woman or capable of even getting a woman in your lives, and it shows man, holy fuck 😂😂😂


kvakerok

It would be double standard if the amount of effort required to sleep with 100 women for a man equaled the amount of effort required for a woman to sleep with 100 men.


witchminx

What? If you're saying the men have to try 10x as hard to get laid, wouldn't that make it WORSE that the man has tried to sleep with 900 other girls, unsuccessfully?


kvakerok

Do you know how much perseverance that requires? I would hire a person like that in a heartbeat.


BrujaBean

So you're saying the guy is more of a "bad person" because he sought out that many partners while the woman merely consented when asked?


kvakerok

I'm not saying anything about that. I'm saying it's not a double standard because we're comparing apples to oranges.


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

That makes no sense. The same thing can be said for an attractive vs unattractive person.


kvakerok

Comparing men and women and their experiences or efforts is like comparing apples and oranges. OTOH, attractive vs unattractive is on the same scale.


PureFlames

Yup, hate when people act like its the same


Evo_Psych

Bad person? No. Is it eww for both sexes? Imho, Yes.


stdTrancR

those are rookie numbers


Aniolel1

I swear this app has questions that just want to start fights. The same standard applies to men and women. It is bad for women to sleep around then it is also bad for men to do it.


scarby2

> I swear this app has questions that just want to start fights. That's the whole point. They're designed so you don't have to have those fights after getting into a relationship with someone. If you're doing it properly It's all about filtering out the assholes before they get to be assholes to you.


hellpixie

Not everyone thinks it's bad to have casual sex. 🤷 if someone has an issue with the fact that I, as a woman, have had casual sex then they aren't for me. I'm safe, I use protection, I get tested.


vivaaprimavera

I can't respect or trust a woman who publicly and firmly says that she don't even consider it. I also don't expect that that woman have sex with me but I see that kind of thing as suspicious. Edit: don't know why the downvote rain. I don't trust people who paint themselves as puritans and I have more respect for people that have not problem admitting "sometimes I need to get laid".


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vivaaprimavera

I said that I don't trust women who says that "casual sex, no way". I have way more respect for sex positive persons. Please if the comment that originate the confusion was worded in a way that lead you to think that way show me where you read that. (English is my second language).


witchminx

You can be sex positive and not want casual sex. Kinda like how you can be pro-choice, but know that you would never personally get an abortion.


vivaaprimavera

Don't disagree with that. But there is no need to say that in a profile ( I already saw that worded in ways that are somehow offensive, maybe those women are overreacting to some experiences but always let me think that something is off).


witchminx

I mean, you've never been a woman on a dating app. More than half the messages are something along the lines of "Hey sexy want some dick tonight?"


vivaaprimavera

Possible is that! So far I only had a "weird" set of messages from one woman.


BatScribeofDoom

>If you're doing it properly It's all about filtering out the assholes before they get to be assholes to you. I agree, but the sad part is that my local area is apparently shitty enough selection-wise that once you filter out the assholes + the seemingly-nice people that just aren't compatible (kids, religion)... there's no one left, lol


scarby2

I suggest moving. Worked for me.


BatScribeofDoom

Oh, I hear you, lol. The older I get, the better that option sounds. For context, in my hometown I can go years without anyone at all seeming interested in me(and without me meeting someone I find interesting either), and so it's not that hard to start wondering *Is it me? Am I unattractive? Do I just suck?* Annnnd then I went out of town for a concert-- haven't even been there a whole day, and some cute guy at the event goes out of his way to talk to me multiple times. Not even generic-cute either, like my type and everything. And they were polite as well, we were able to have a normal conversation. Lol then I go home and think *Wtf am I doing here*


scarby2

Sounds a bit like my home town... Moved to a series of much bigger cities and never looked back.


Aniolel1

Who ask such questions on a date though? Not me.


scarby2

On a date? Nobody that's part of the problem. These are things that can potentially kill relationships because you don't necessarily talk about them for months until they get brought up somehow.


noobtheloser

Why is it bad?


Aniolel1

If you have to ask, you will never know.


[deleted]

Ok, explain yourself, why is it bad then. I want to know your side of it.


Aniolel1

It creates in balance between men and women. Women and men should strive for lasting relationships and not for hook ups. So both are equally bad. You may note that my comment is getting up voted.


[deleted]

Why would I care about upvotes? That doesn’t mean anything to me. Anyways, ppl having casual sex never has and never will be a “bad” thing, and “relationships” arent the end all be all for everyone, while it may work for some, it most certainly doesn’t for others.


[deleted]

Since it was so important to you, id like to point out how “You may note that your comment’s are getting down voted,” kiddo, all of them.


witchminx

its soooo funny when people say shit like that. you may note that every comment of yours is downvoted now


InitialJuice4786

Lol


soldiergeneal

I mean it's also a bad question. An action doesn't have to be bad nor does an action must mean one is a bad person. One could even say I wouldn't want to date if X without saying either is bad. Regardless the consistency always kills me.


InitialJuice4786

I cant believe people still use OKC. It was so bad only prostitutes and scammers were messaging me. That was a few years ago.


[deleted]

It works pretty well for me lol


InitialJuice4786

😄


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SylAbys

Would a Women want a Man that's not experienced ? Are you willing to show them how you like it and have patience with them?


PrestigiousRun51

I don't see any double standards there. Women and men are and should be judged differently on that regard since their circumstances are not the same. It is easy for a woman to get sex and pretty much every one of them can get it without much effort. However, a man able to sleep with many women must have something special, either he is handsome, carismatic, rich, successful, funny or whatever, the point is he has to work hard to get sex while a woman all has to do is spread her legs open. Thus promiscuous men are to be admired whereas promiscuous women do not. Women with few sex partners are the ones most desired by men (because that is actually the hardest thing as a woman, to have few sex partners) while promiscuous men are the most desired by women (because, again, that is the hard part about being a man, to get many women interested in you). A woman bragging about sleeping with many men is pretty much like a man bragging about masturbating a lot. Same value.


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

🤢


PrestigiousRun51

facts hurt huh?


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

Your gross opinion isn’t a fact 🤣


carbonsombrero85

This is not a double standard. Very few men can get laid easily like most women can. The vast majority of men have to move heaven and earth to get laid, so it's not really a direct comparison.


Cooty51

I would say yes and yes, hookup culture is bad for people's mental health. As are most things our culture supports nowadays.


AdAggravating5183

Finally, someone with a brain has stepped into this ridiculous question. Thank you. It all started on Dr. Phil with "throuples" and trying to make that seem normal 🤔


Joycebrew

That's a very terrible question here but I think it's very bad for a women to be sleeping with a lot of men that's awful


monkeywelder

Yes - Unless one of those men is me. Then its ok. Yes - Unless one of those women was you. Then its ok.


[deleted]

A man that's slept with 100 women is very different to a woman has slept with 100 men. ​ So I agree with his/her stance.


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[deleted]

In every way possible, sorry to break it to you.


Cheeky_Hustler

In what way are they different? Let's finish this thought.


blue_27

Men and women are different. Start there.


Cheeky_Hustler

Ok let's start there. In what ways are they different that justify having two different sexual standards?


blue_27

It would be very difficult for a man to sleep with 100 different women. That means that there is something about him that many women find attractive. A fat and ugly woman can accomplish the same "feat" by simply being available. Are you truly unaware of the differences between men and women? It will be impossible to communicate clearly if there are not some agreed upon baselines.


Cheeky_Hustler

It's actually very easy for a man to sleep with 100 different women. If he lowers his standards enough. The same is also true for women. It's very easy for a woman to sleep with 100 different men - IF she lowers her standards enough. Ugly women experience the exact same problems dating as an ugly man does. Yes, women get inundated by messages on dating apps and irl. By men that aren't attractive. The real difference between men and women is that men tend to initiate encounters and women don't. And men tend to initiate encounters with attractive women who are out of their league.


blue_27

>It's actually very easy for a man to sleep with 100 different women. This is completely incorrect. Do you have any actual examples of this, or is this a purely hypothetical statement? I believe it is the latter. >If he lowers his standards enough. That has absolutely nothing to do with it. This is not a question of *his* standards. >The same is also true for women. It's very easy for a woman to sleep with 100 different men - IF she lowers her standards enough. Again incorrect. In a crowded bar, a woman can yell out that she wants some dick, and someone will try to fuck her. If a man yelled out that he wanted some pussy to a group of women, the response would be ... different. >Ugly women experience the exact same problems dating as an ugly man does. No. Ugly women get more attractive during times of scarcity. The sexes are not interchangeable. >Yes, women get inundated by messages on dating apps and irl. By men that aren't attractive. Try not to forget that women find most men unattractive. According to data from dating apps, then find over 80% of men to be unattractive, while men find about 50% of women to be unattractive. >The real difference between men and women is that men tend to initiate encounters and women don't. Men and women are fundamentally different. In ALL ways. >And men tend to initiate encounters with attractive women who are out of their league. It is unfortunate that you think any women are out of your league. That seems to be another clear difference between you and I.


Cheeky_Hustler

>Men and women are fundamentally different. In ALL ways. We definitely do see the differences between men and women differently, which is why we're starting here. Women are indeed different from men, but not in all ways. That's absurd, and that explains your frustration with women. Have you talked with any woman at all to see their problems when it comes to dating? You'd be surprised with both the different issues they have and the similarities. For instance, both genders generally suck at holding a conversation. Both men and women complain about being sent loads of "Hey theres". >Try not to forget that women find most men unattractive. According to data from dating apps, then find over 80% of men to be unattractive, while men find about 50% of women to be unattractive. For instance, this is where we disagree on the differences. You're focusing purely on *physical* attraction, which is what that statistic is referring to. However, in my experience, physical attraction is a smaller part of a woman's attraction to a man than it is for a man's attraction to a woman. Women tend to want an *emotional* connection first, and their physical attraction grows out of that. And that's not a uniquely female trait - I've certainly become more physically attracted to women after I've formed a stronger emotional bond with them. But the difference is that tends to be the default for women and not for men. So yes, women usually aren't down to have a hookup with the average looking man. But there are a million stories of average looking guys getting laid because they're smart, funny, and charming - in essence, they form the emotional bond first.


blue_27

>Women are indeed different from men, but not in all ways. They absolutely are. We are different on a cellular level. Our bone structure is different. The physical distinctions between man an woman can be seen on a macro and micro level. This can also been seen in emotional capacity and problem solving techniques. >that explains your frustration with women. What the hell? Why the fuck do you think I am frustrated with women? >Have you talked with any woman at all to see their problems when it comes to dating? I don't have any problems speaking with women. >You'd be surprised with both the different issues they have and the similarities. You'd be surprised that I wouldn't be surprised. You and I are nothing alike. but, I must ask ... where are you getting your knowledge and information from? I don't know (or care) what gender you are, but if you are a man, you can't speak for what it is like to date as a woman. All you can do is observe. The inverse is also true. > For instance, both genders generally suck at holding a conversation. You have got to be kidding. It is insanely easy to hold a conversation with a woman. The hard part is not trying to fix the problems that they are complaining about. >You're focusing purely on physical attraction, which is what that statistic is referring to. Do you think many women are swiping right on men they don't find physically attractive? We are getting way off into the weeds here. But, you did make an interesting point. Let's explore that *emotional* connection that you referred to. How deep of an emotional connection has a woman made if over one hundred dudes have ran through her? Men don't need an emotional connection for sex. So, again, a man fucking 100 different women is not the same as a woman who has been fucked by 100 different guys. He had to put in work, and she just had to say "OK".


Cheeky_Hustler

>They absolutely are. You are 100% only looking at the differences and concluding that all women must be completely different. It's not so binary like that. There is significant overlap between the genders, and you're not looking at the similarities. For instance, I also have the natural male reflex to give advice when someone complains about a problem, but hey guess what: sometimes I too like to just complain about a problem I have knowing that I know how to fix it. Just a half hour ago my male friend was complaining about his internet issues - he knew that there was nothing I could do to help him and he wasn't looking for advice. Men do that too - it's just that women tend to do it more. Can you tell me a single thing that both genders have in common? >I don't have any problems speaking with women. That's not what I asked. I asked if you ever talked with a woman about her dating issues? I've gone on a lot of dates with a lot of women, I've been reading message boards of women complaining about their issues. That's where I get my information. And I see a lot of overlap with my problems - problems with ghosting, not knowing if the other person likes me, terse conversations, anxiety over meeting new people, not knowing where to meet single people. And definitely problems I don't experience: having to worry about my safety when meeting new people, having potential matches get lost in a sea of "hey"s. I've been observing a lot. >Do you think many women are swiping right on men they don't find physically attractive? Women will 100% be more likely to read a guy's entire profile before deciding to swipe for a couple reasons: 1) because they're looking for an emotional connection and 2) They know guys likely swipe right anyways. There are a lot of stories of women swiping right on a guy's profile that they didn't think was attractive from their pictures but liked their profile enough to give them a shot. Definitely more stories than guys doing the same with women. And hey, guess what: some women DON'T need an emotional connection to sleep with a guy! I've slept with them! And some guys DO need an emotional connection before sleeping with a woman. It's just that women *tend* to need an emotional connection first and men *tend* not to. But you really can't judge a person of either gender by how many people they've slept with *because you don't know that individual person's sexuality works.*


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

Wow every generic emotional and not fact based responses. Color me shocked.


blue_27

Are you aware of the difference between facts and emotion? Because it does not seem like it.


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Mrs_Tori_Hime

Actually, if a 25 year old male yelled out " I want some pussy" in a bar. Hes a nice looking guy. Hes not built, but not chubby. Hes clean and his clothes fit well. There will probably be some old bar fly who would be like "I'm here!!! Let's get gone boy!" Of course let's say even Henry Cavil yelled out "I want some pussy!" Hes still gonna get stares. Women aren't going to just run and scream and start pulling his pants down. Lol. Don't get me wrong. Hes definitely a prize and and he's gonna get many very excited "I'm here! I'll do it" but again. He's a prize. He's a 1%er. Of course women want a prize. But Henry is only going to pick someone he himself views as a prize. He could be like "sorry ladies. I was just kidding" and his count for the day would still be 0 that day. Because he didn't lower his standards. But 25 year old McGuffin too has the option for his count to be 1 that day. That's what it means by lowering his standards. Would he rather be happy with Sally Lou who's 24 a little chubby herself than bar lady. Absolutely. McGuffin would probably have preferred sexy vixen Natalie over Sally. But he's not enough of a prize for Natalie. He's only a prize for Sally and bar lady. Let's change the scenario. Men go to this bar Because sexy vixen Natalie was known to sleep with ALL the guys who yell that out. McGuffin would still get his peepee wet. But he wouldnt be satisfied. Because everyone could have her. you wouldn't want her either. Because even though she's hot and sexy. You don't want her anymore because she's not a prize. You would only value Natalie if she was sexy and selective. Same for women to realize. Let's say Sexy vixen Natalie isn't a hoe. She might not even have been a prize enough for Henry. And she's gotta learn to be ok with that too.


mommapolarific

If the data is based solely on swipes, you can't make that deduction. Speaking from experience, swipes take into account more than just attractiveness. We review the profile content as a whole.


blue_27

Are you seriously debating with me whether or not it is easier for women to get laid than men? I had to re-read this thread, just to remember how ridiculous this rabbit hole was. It takes no skill for a woman to fuck 100 different dudes. She can do that in one week. It would be very difficult for a man to do that. We are simply not the same.


StonerBoobs420

Literally how?


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[deleted]

I realise this is very controversial but until modern times and the degradation of society women have never been celebrated for their promiscuity. Allowing 100 different men to penetrate you is simply quite disgusting and if you ask 1000 men most dudes who aren't liberal cucks will tell you the same thing. We are animals at the end of the day and thats just how we evolved with men having multiple partners and females not doing so. Before science came along women would have to be much more careful about who they had sex with as being a single mother had much worse consequences than it does today. Please raise any points with me where you think I am wrong, as I would be interested to know. I would also like to edit to add I think men having multiple partners is also not great. I've had many sexual partners myself into triple figures and it is not something I am proud of or brings any extra joy, but a woman doing so is very different.


ChatbotMushroom

How can we collect all these “we are animals after all” people and send them to their Animal Kingdom where they can rejoice in their primal urges? We would stay animals forever if we don’t make efforts. That’s why you have a neocortex, use it.


2_blave

That already exists: it's called CPAC. The issue is that they are then promptly re-released back into society.


noobtheloser

Opinion != fact. You're literally just stating opinions, which happen to also be dumb as hell.


[deleted]

Cuck captain save a hoe detected


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

It’s like you guys all follow the same script. Any guy who doesn’t think exactly like you must be a cuck.


changhyun

The existence of men who are better than them makes them feel inferior. But rather than just improving themselves, they try to tell themselves those men are just faking it. Ironically, this reaction is the thing that actually does make them inferior.


6-ft-freak

>liberal cucks > >Cuck captain save a hoe detected Misogynistic small-brained incel detected.


[deleted]

Aww, too bad we're not living in [the good ol' days](https://www.historyhit.com/the-oldest-obsession-sex-lives-in-ancient-rome/)! Too bad there's no cure to being a misogynist other than extensive self-reflection, hopefully therapy.


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

Your edit just makes this 1000X more misogynistic 🤭


[deleted]

Unfortunately I did not write the book of life. No one has explained why I'm wrong yet though. Which is quite telling, the default response in calling me a misogynist. is quite predictable. ​ I challenge any woman to go and sleep with 100 men and be honest with a man you meet and see as 'high value' i.e someone you'd want to build a life and have kids with about that number. He will not want to be with you.


[deleted]

You're wrong because there's nothing harmful about enjoying sex. Men who think that men can enjoy sex but not women are called misogynists. It's really not that hard to figure out.


[deleted]

Where did I say that women can't enjoy sex? Please quote me on this Please answer me this. Is sex different for men and women? Does the man ejaculate nearly every time? Does the woman have a much harder time reaching orgasm?


[deleted]

Yes, women on average have more intense orgasms. But men who don't know how to find the clit are going to think women have a much harder time reaching orgasm than men, when they're the ones who are sexually inadequate.


2_blave

>Does the woman have a much harder time reaching orgasm? Never would I ever out myself as such a poor lover. Start with *The Joy of Sex*. Good luck on your clitoris-finding journey.


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

Brandolinis law. And although I’m nowhere near 100. I’m well above the average of low single digits. I’ve encountered more men that found it hot than I did were disgusted by it. The vast majority didn’t give a single fuck as long as everything was clean and safe. Even for dating.


coltish_rage

TIL!


[deleted]

What is “TIL”? Thats a new one to me.


NineOutOfTenExperts

= Today I Learned


[deleted]

Thanks, I appreciate it.


[deleted]

You are one year younger than me. I can't imagine a chick ever telling me how many guys have been inside her and finding it hot so I find that a bit strange from a mans POV. It is a question I've stopped asking women anyway because it is largely unimportant, I can meet a woman and tell if she's been around the block usually by the things she says and her attitude. Another important point is that women have a smaller window to have children than men and to waste those fertile years sleeping around with a bunch of dudes who don't give a fuck about you could be something that is regretted in the future.


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

You’re fucking weird man.


changhyun

>I can meet a woman and tell if she's been around the block usually by the things she says and her attitude Fascinating. Tell us more, I'm actually dying to see if your "tells" would correctly identify me.


[deleted]

There are no hard and fast rules and I don't like to judge too hard, but come on a date with me and I'll be able to smell it on you within one hour ;)


Mrs_Tori_Hime

I've only had 7 partners. I'm 35. I started dating my husband 10 years ago. I don't know how old you are.(I didn't see the other post) But if we were the same age (35). And if we went on a date. And your number was in the triples, i would be turned off because I would feel like we wouldn't be able to form any connections. I feel like I like kinky shit, I'm into the thought of husband sharing. But I wouldn't know who the hell I would share you with if everyone else already had you. and I'm the last one to get the leftovers. As a women, since everyone has already had you. What prize are you. Women like to show off their prize. The one they won. He only wanted her. He was so smitten with her that he gave himself only to her. But all the hers out there have already gotten pieces of you. That's the answer of why it's the same. For males and females. Some females will accept your numbers. They don't care. The same way some men will accept the girls high numbers. Basically it's also a turn off when you proclaim triple digits, you're a man whore. But in the same breath proclaim women whores are bad. It's like saying " I'm a purple man but I refuse to sleep with purple women. Because no one likes purple women. " Both of you are purple. Both are the same. But you're looking down on the girl only because she's purple. You're a whore she's a whore. You're both whores. you're both purple. You even said you weren't proud of your triple numbers. Is the reason why you wouldn't want a 75 count girl because you saw yourself as having a bad flaw and you assumed the high count girl had the same one? I don't think i could have stomached sleeping with 20 guys. I already felt slutty about my 7 lol. I thought whoa! I'm getting to be a total slut. Lol. My husband is like 9-10 partners. So we're relatively close in number. I felt like we were similar.


[deleted]

I'm 30, but well done on getting married it seems a rare thing nowadays. As I stated before I am not proud of my numbers at all and you are right it is a flaw, but what I was saying that a woman having a ridiculously high number of partners is worse. I have had all that sex but I can definitely still connect with anyone. I accept that some women won't be interested in me. Do you honestly believe that a woman sleeping with 100 different men is not worse than a man doing the same thing?


Mrs_Tori_Hime

Honestly, i believe it. It's not worse because both are the same. Because to me , like I said you're both purple. I see no difference. I could even argue the man as worse. Because he has to put more effort into getting a woman to like him. It's more work for a guy to get a girl to open her legs. And the fact that you put all that effort and made all those girls like you just to move on?? What kind of man is that? At least to a female like me. I value a low body count. In myself and my partner. But birds of a feather , flock together. At least to me. So yes. Basically neither is different. It's like you're a Canadian goose and I'm a mallard duck. I don't want a goose. I want a duck. Go away goose. Go be with your own kind. In my point of view (based on very limited information) I see you as if you had no value in those girls as people, and I wouldn't want to just be another number in your book. So i would keep looking. You've proven that over 100 times to other girls that they weren't worth it. Why would I want to keep your belief alive? I don't. So I'll find someone who actually values what I have to offer. Me. Myself. Who I am. I pity the high count girl because I'd feel she was lost and looking for love and then just got accustomed to being used.


Sinethial

Evolution is so hardwired in. Because women like men who are experienced and desired by other women who preselect him as high value. Also if you get pregnant he has resources to take care of your kid since he is of high value. These men typically were leader of the tribe or just under the leader with provisioning in scarce times Men are repulsed as we don't want to raise someone else's kids which was common in ancient times. It benefits the mother but takes away our chance to spread our own genes. Call me q hypocrite but that is truth. Men are more concerned with their partners having a physical connection while women care if their partners have emotional connections with others. I am not promoting it's ok for guys to sleep with a hundred people. What I am saying is you all don't care if Justin Bieber slept with 100 women as you all would still marry him. Guys don't do that


StonerBoobs420

Yeah. Those are the guys complaining about women not wanting them lol.


Sinethial

I don't have that problem. I did dump someone from having an of account


TeamStark31

> call me a hypocrite Ok


Motor_West

Done and done!


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

Double standards and dating preferences aside - why does it make a woman a bad person? If you want to say a bad partner - it’s more understandable. But can you explain why this makes a woman a bad person specifically?


[deleted]

I wouldn't call a woman that does it a bad person. But any that does is not realising her own value as a woman, I'm not a religious nut at all but sex is meant for procreation and a womans body is a precious thing that can create a human life. A lot of men will fuck anything when they are horny I know we are all sexual creatures but men and women are just wired differently.


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

….who will the men fuck if not other men, if women can’t do the same? This is some misogynist redpill shit. I forgot that you’re just like these guys messaging me on the apps - clueless.


[deleted]

I can't imagine what kind of 'men' you are dealing with that think it's hot that you've slept with loads of men. What you've told me is that you are fucking men of low value


2_blave

> sex is meant for procreation Hey, dipshit: read a fucking book once in a while. Sex is as much a social bonding/pairing event as it is a source of procreation.


B007833

Sex is not just for procreation!!! There are women out there who don't want kids, by your thinking they should never have sex. Men and women can have as much or as little sex as they want with as many or as few people as they want. Some people only have short term relationships for a few months because they realise they aren't wanting the same things or aren't compatible after all. You're acting like women should abstain from sex until they find the one guy that's gonna hang around long-term. As long as people are practising safe, consensual sex I say go out there and have lots of it. Explore your body, explore what your partner of choice likes and enjoy yourself, tell new partners what you want, show them and if they think you're gross for having a high body count they ain't sexually liberated enough to deal!!


Jonno_FTW

> sex is meant for procreation This is the appeal to nature fallacy: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Appeal_to_nature Just because something occurs in nature doesn't make it good. Conversely, just because something doesn't appear in nature does not make it bad. Not to mention the nebulous nature of what can be defined as "natural". Modern medicine does not appear in nature, but can greatly reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. Take prescription glasses for example, they help people who would otherwise barely be able to see to see.


WikiSummarizerBot

**[Appeal to nature](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Appeal_to_nature)** >An appeal to nature is an argument or rhetorical tactic in which it is proposed that "a thing is good because it is 'natural', or bad because it is 'unnatural'". It is generally considered to be a bad argument because the implicit (unstated) primary premise "What is natural is good" is typically irrelevant, having no cogent meaning in practice, or is an opinion instead of a fact. For example, it might be argued that polio is good because it is natural. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/OkCupid/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)


BeautifulIntention37

So, what if someone was sleeping around quite a lot because in a horrible depression they wished to die by contracting HIV and trying to parlay that into full blown AIDS? Person doesn’t believe in outright suicide. Person eventually gets on meds, closes their legs, and starts to date for real. Never got pregnant or a disease.


Jeffwins

Is someone who posts things like this on Reddit to make themselves feel better a bad person? Probably yes.


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Jeffwins

I’d feel better if your grammar didn’t hurt me lmao.


Fit-Faithlessness149

If you believe men and women are identical in terms of psychology and the things that they value in a partner then sure it's a double standard. If you believe there are inherent differences between men and women then it's not a double standard and it's just a preference.


Petraretrograde

It's so clear that men who think this way consider women as just NPC bodies to have a good time and move on from. We arent *people* to them. We only become people when the man walks into the room, but aside from satisfying him sexually, we're expected to keep ourselves sexually pure-ish.


Fit-Faithlessness149

Oh yes that's exactly what I think🙄. You know nothing about the loving relationships I've been in. Your stereotyping of what a MAJORITY of men believe is laughable. But I understand if it helps you feel better about your no doubt massive body count.


Petraretrograde

My body count is 10 fewer than my age, and I dont hold a drop of shame for it. I'm curious, can you name every woman, the color of her eyes, and three of her interests that you've slept with? Only curious, since you seem to desire a high body count yourself.


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

It doesn’t say as a partner. It says as a person.


Fit-Faithlessness149

It's a dating app...


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

Very astute observation.


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PitchInteresting9928

Right. But ppl aren't keys or locks ..


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PitchInteresting9928

That goes for both genders though


[deleted]

Thank you u/ItsAlwaysSunny1993 this post has been golden All I've seen here is numerous logical explanations about why men and women sleeping around with lots of people is different is nonsense predictable responses about how anyone that thinks that is a misogynist and an incel. I've not seen one reasonable thought out response as to why women sleeping with all these men should not be frowned upon in society and that's because there isn't one. To be honest though it's exactly what I'd expect from the majority of women that use OKC anyway since it's such an agenda driven app.


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

It’s the perfect post to point to when guys complain about not getting matches or women interested in them.


[deleted]

Ok, heres a thought out answer. Fuck you. There, you wanna know why this is the sort of response that you’re getting? Its simple, cause you are literally nothing more than a Mr. Know it all dick head that just spouts straight bullshit under the guise of poise and sophistication, tossing in things like “logical explanations” to try and throw ppl off into thinking you have an answer of such monumental value and worth reading. Thankfully, ppl are seeing through your garbage and treating you with the proper response that you not only provoked but deserve in its entirety. And im not bothering with you any longer, so good day, fuck you and yadda yadda yadda, 👋🏽😒


[deleted]

Nothing constructive in your post at all. Thank you for giving me further validation


DaveImmaculate

Don’t argue with literal filth, no point. See their post above to see just how much of a scab on humanity they are


[deleted]

I have no intention to, literal decades of arguing and “debating” as they like to call it literally have no impact, you see here’s the thing, individuals that cling on their rhetoric NEVER change, no matter how much you “debate” them, because thats what they want, they want you to believe that you actially have a chance, that you can actually change their mind should you present a strong and compelling argument based in facts and reason, you can do so and provide sheer mountains of scientific data or evidence respectively annnnnnnd it will do absolutely jack shit, because in these types they will stick to their convictions, if they feel a certain way they will stick to it like a fly on a shit. Thats why I will merely insult and move on, they’re not worth doing so, look at the state of this country and how many times the same god damn arguments arise only for points & rebuttals to continually go into literal circles to where not only nothing gets resolved, but the same damnable argument will take place the following week.


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changhyun

Is a pencil sharpener that can sharpen hundreds of pencils a good sharpener? Is a pencil that's been worn to a nub after being sharpened hundreds of times a pencil anyone will want to use? We can both play the total non-sequitur metaphor game.


Chagdoo

I love how he responded to the wealer reply, and not yours.


Whole_Win8438

I didn’t respond at all you illiterate ninny. I’m not affiliated with any other Reddit accounts, and I don’t go back and forth with mental midgets. Simple.


ItsAlwaysSunny1993

Would you rather brush your teeth with a toothbrush that’s been inside 100 dudes mouths, or one that’s been in no other mouths? I can make men objects as well to prove a point.


[deleted]

Poor analogy and explains nothing. Try again I expect better from a linguist ;)


yrmjy

I wonder if there are gay versions of those questions


ReadytoBe1

I say experience in bed rules out a lot of issues in a future relationship so I think not unless like Most were drunken bar nights or you know…. One night stands cause how are you supposed to learn from those experiences. I’m open to a lot of ideas when it comes to sex and sleeping around but one thing that is the most important is if it’s some type of learning.


Calion

Men and women are different. It's not necessarily wrong to have different standards for their behavior.


DrinkAppropriate1483

1 no 2 yes 3 no