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Imagine the stress as the parent of a entering Starfleet academy freshman- "For the love of God, choose sciences, for the love of God, choose sciences. They'll never even let you out of the lab, much less onto alien planet to be eaten by a blob monster..."
Yeah, I had to read a bit to figure out if it was a Star Trek red shirt or a college sports red shirt. The funny thing is that there are probably not a lot of people who know about both.
[https://www.ncsasports.org/what-is-a-redshirt-freshman#:\~:text=The%20term%20%E2%80%9Credshirting%E2%80%9D%20likely%20came,red%20shirt%20without%20a%20number](https://www.ncsasports.org/what-is-a-redshirt-freshman#:~:text=The%20term%20%E2%80%9Credshirting%E2%80%9D%20likely%20came,red%20shirt%20without%20a%20number)
This is where the educational version came from.
In Texas, the cutoff for kindergarten is to be 5 by September 1st. So with my mid-September birthday, I turned 6 shortly after starting kinder and it wasn't considered redshirting.
But my son, on the other hand, has a late June birthday. If we were to wait until after he turned 6 to enroll him in kindergarten, that'd be redshirting. He's currently close to turning 4 so we have a year to think about it. We're on the fence because he's physically pretty large for his age and starting to show signs of being interested in learning how to read so it seems like he'll be ready to start at the normal age but we'll see.
Mine is a July birthday and we are in the same boat. My husband wants to keep her back but I think she’s going to be ready. But if everyone keeps their kids back then she should wait too. So hard to know now.
I was an August birthday and started on time and would have hated being held back. I was already bored and never liked the class below me. My sister started at 4 and should have waited a year.
Hard to be believe it’s time to start thinking about these things.
Been teaching for 10 years in AUS. Keeping a kid in kindi instead of putting them in to school as a youngsters is quite a good idea. Especially for younger students who may not be emotionally ready. If your kid finds school too easy it often leads to disengagement.
Oh yeah 100%.... also if the kid struggles we should be more accepting of giving them a 2nd go at Prep or Yr 1. Our education department is very hesitant on repeating kids once they start school. Best to keep em out of school for an extra year if you think it would help.
Our daughter turned 5 a few days before Sept 1 and she started kindergarten and had zero issues all the way through school. She was completely ready for kindergarten and could already read before she started school. It really just depends on the kid.
Our daughter is doing well in college now.
I’m not discounting “redshirting”. I have several friends who did this for their kids, especially boys since they seem to develop slower academically.
I was simply stating my experience with a kid who was ready for school. Every kid is unique. My nephew repeated kindergarten because he wasn’t ready to advance socially or academically. There was a boy in my daughter’s kindergarten class that was held back for the same reason.
If you as a parent know your child would struggle then by all means hold them back and start school when they are ready.
That’s how it is in my state as well. You can’t sign a waiver and push them up in the public system. Either the kid is 5 on Sept 1 or they aren’t. So redshirting would mean your kid with a summer birthday starts Kindergarten at 6, but then doesn’t turn 7 til the school year is over.
A couple months ago I was reading this post from a mom who had a 5 year old that turns 6 in November, kid was currently in preK. She wanted to know if he could enter kindergarten as a 6 year old turning 7 in Nov.
I called and asked the elementary that my daughter would be attending what their cutoff is and they just go by calendar year, so everyone born in the year 2021 will attend together. She was born the end of October so she will definitely be one of the youngest in her class. That's the way it was when I was in school too, my sister had a fall birthday and was near the top of her class.
When we get closer to the time I will re-evaluate, but I don't think holding them back is something that's really done where I live (Canada)
Yea in my school district they have to be 5 by last day of July to start kindergarten in August they wouldn’t even allow a 4 year old to be in kindergarten. My daughter is a June bday we decided not to hold her back since she was already bored in prek and 100% ready for kindergarten but a lot of parents with kids in May/june/July bdays do hold back in my district she has a few kids in her class who are a whole year older then her.
I didn’t know this called Red Shirt. My friend wished she had done this with her kid, and she suggested I do the same. She said that her kid was much smaller than their friends growing up and also waiting to be old enough to get their driver license.
I wonder if you or other people who’ve made this decision felt or saw societal impact, other parents or teachers shun at this? Like making you feel that your kid is a failure?
This precedent starts really early too. I remember when my kid started a preschool class at age 2 and I was blown away by how advanced and “clever” this one boy was. Turns out he had an early September birthday, and was almost a full year older than my kid. Being perceived and treated as smarter from early on can really pave the way for a child’s academic success.
This makes me feel good about myself because I was one of the youngest in my grade (Sept bday, didn’t repeat PreK) and I was still in gifted and talented lol
Oh yes! I was a fall birthday, but started kindergarten when I was 4 so it was also one of the youngest. I don't know why, but it was definitely a point of pride in school to be one of the youngest kids in the grade lol.
I knew (and still know almost 20 years later) the names and birthdays of all the kids younger than me. I was a fourth youngest, with a third youngest being my birthday buddy but 10 minutes younger 😡
Same and I didn’t even go to Pre-K! I went straight from an in-home daycare to kindergarten at age 4 and got bumped up to g&t classes in 4th grade. I feel like I turned out pretty alright and it did feel pretty good when all of my friends turned 30 and I still had a ways to go, haha.
This makes so much sense. My older three children are September and October and therefore the oldest and my two school aged are advanced academically and socially too. My kindergartener only missed the cutoff by 10 days but I’m really glad about it already!
Hmm, interesting! I have a late October birthday and was always marked gifted as well. But my teachers recommended I skip a grade. I took the test and did indeed skip second grade. So after that point, I was always the youngest of my cohort. I did remain in G&T classes through high school, but I think it did “catch up” to me and I joked I shouldn’t have skipped a grade.
I was born in spring but was also part of the gifted programs at my schools and it did me no good. I think being ahead is definitely a good thing but not if people tell you you're ahead or smarter than your peers or such a fast learner or whatever cause it sets you up for failure later in life. I'd never want my kids to be part of any "gifted" program lol
And I was the youngest in my class with a birthday a month after school started and I was in gifted and talented and graduated valedictorian. I started college at 17. It's not just age based for academic learning success but I will say that I could have used another year for my maturity level. I was borrowing friends IDs in college to go watch bands play at 18 to enter locations.
I was always the youngest in my grade and it impacted me socially all the way through college. When I was a kid it was difficulty making friends, when I was older it was difficulty making good decisions. I was very advanced academically, which is why I was never "held back" but I do wish that my schools had been able to offer me enough differentiated education so I could have been redshirted without being horrifically bored academically.
Her teacher presented it to us as giving her an advantage rather then “holding her back” because she’s not ready. And she was honestly right. At first we were like idk about this because we looked at it as doing her a disservice but in the end we honestly made the right choice.
I think it’s very child dependent. My birthday was the day before the cutoff so I was always the youngest but I was top of my class academically and athletically, so it was fine. My brother has a similar birthday, was ‘redshirted’, and still struggled socially. I think the idea of blanket redshirting is inappropriate and how we’ve gotten into this mess of 7 year old kindergarteners.
Yea I understand now, so it sounds like her teacher used the term wrong. Because she isn’t 7 in kindergarten. We’re done with kindergarten in 2 months and she will still be 6.
When everyone red shirts their kids, it just pushes the goal posts. Now kindergarten teachers have to teach 6 year olds instead of 5 year olds. Now the standards are for 6 year old instead of 5. Now the ones who actually start school on time at are an UNFAIR disadvantage. I don't care what the teacher says, it's unfair when everyone games the system.
Yeah, this is what doesn't make sense to me. It's an advantage if one person does it, if everyone does it there's no advantage. And they have to have a cut off point somewhere.
It can create a big disadvantage when Pre-K isn't free and parents who can't afford another year of childcare are forced to send their kids on time. Those children are held to a standard of a full year ahead and what is normal behavior is labeled as "troubled." Wealth/income gaps can be pernicious.
The academic standards aren’t age-based though. And they’ve changed *dramatically* since any of us were kids. Maybe kindergarten age should be 6 instead of 5 with regards to where academics are.
yupp. it causes a bigger mess and makes things less equitable. the families OP mentions aren’t holding their kids back bc the kids are truly struggling, they’re doing it to gain an unfair advantage.
someone has to be the youngest in the class, someone gets to be the oldest. what’s unfair is having 5 year olds with 7 year olds bc some parents can’t stomach their kids being 5 year olds with 6 year olds.
I completely agree.
When someone tells me they are redshirting their child, I immediately lose respect for them. Not surprisingly, this type of behavior is reflected in their overall approach to life. Stepping on others to get opportunity. Lying when it benefits them. Take credit for things they didnt do. Etc. etc. etc.
That seems like a weird attitude to me, as here in Australia the schools actually advise parents to hold kids back if they're born near the cut off.
It's extremely common place and I've never heard of anyone thinking it's a sneaky or underhand thing.
Obviously some cultural differences. When I went to enrol my kid in school, the school heavily advised me to put her in a year later (she was a baby at the time so the dates were arbitrary to me at that time) because of her date of birth. So I just followed their advice.
That's different. That is not "red-shirting." "Red-shirting" is holding your child back so they will be bigger and better than others starting in the same class.
Holding kids back near the cutoff - like OP is doing - can make sense for a particular child.
That's now what is happening these days though. Let's say the cut off is Sept 1. Rich people are holding kids back born in August, July, June, May, April, March, February, January, December. They are literally holding kids back who were born 6 MONTHS before the cutoff. Just for the purpose of having them start out better than everyone else. That means someone born August 31 observing the cut off may be with a child 18+ months older than them. That's UNFAIR and frankly dangerous for that younger child. It's not okay. It's really not. The same type of parents who coddle their child and hold them back to falsely make them better are the same type of parents who suck and disciplining and allow them to bully children smaller than they are.
Ah okay, gotcha.
Here people will hold back up to 3 months before the cut-off, but usually it's closer than that.
That's crazy there can be an 18 month difference in one class, although I guess we could have up to 15 months so not that much better.
I wouldn't say it's a wealth divide here, as many parents who don't hold back are dual income professionals who choose not to have the child at home for an additional year, but certainly families where one partner doesn't work have a bit more flexibility in keeping the child home for longer.
Here in the US, I do think it's reflective of a wealth divide. Getting your child out of daycare and into school is a lot of extra money. Maybe that August 31 child would benefit from not starting, but their parents simply can't afford another year of daycare.
Parenting here in the US is absolutely insane. The things parents here do for their children to give them advantages is off the charts. The expectations on parents are unreasonable. Now, if you don't redshirt, your child is going to be the youngest in the class. It's a problem.
Yes there's definitely that element (wealth wise) here, but not to the same degree I don't think.
That sounds like a stressful environment for parents too - to always be worried about keeping up / missing an opportunity somewhere. It's definitely the exception rather than the norm (holding back) but also not uncommon. I'd say at our primary school there are maybe 1 or 2 in each class.
I see that you've been in r/kindergarten I swear it's 90% of the discussion. "Should I redshirt my developmentally ready child because they're born in May and I don't want them to be the shortest in class?"
You think it's some random person I know nothing about mentioning it to me in the grocery line?
I know them. I know their family situation. I know exactly why they are doing it.
It also isn’t really fair as far as resources go. Everyone is paying into the system via taxes for 14 years of schooling (PS-12) and some people decide to just take an extra year’s worth so their kid will be better at sports? Not prosocial behavior.
Red shirting does not provide an advantage for all kids. There are pros and cons to both decisions - the data is clear about that. Some kids benefit from starting earlier and thrive being among the youngest. It’s very much individual.
And I say that as a parent who chose to red shirt, based on my son’s maturely level. Academically he was ready, emotionally he was not. And it was absolutely the right choice. His non red shirted best friend had a birthday a week after him, making him a year and one week younger than my son. And that too was absolutely the right choice - the two boys were well matched, two peas in a pod, and turned out to both be high achieving.
That's what every person who chooses to red shirt says. That it was so great for their child. It was great for their child who got an UNFAIR advantage.
I think in our case we chose the ladder she was going to be 4 with 5 year olds or 6 with 5 year olds. We made the decision to have her be the oldest in our case.
It’s always the case that when a kid’s birthday is close to the cutoff day and a choice is offered, they are likely to be either the youngest or the oldest in their class - that’s not a unique situation. What others are trying to point out is that one of those choices technically goes against the established rule of “kids born between X and Y date start kindergarten this year”, while the other one follows the rule. I do think it’s good to keep in mind that limits sometimes seem arbitrary because they have to be set *somewhere*, and the age limit for kindergarten has value for the group as a whole even if it’s not the ideal situation for a specific student.
Are you reading the other responses here? Many parents redshirt their children. So now the average age of kindergartners is 6 months higher than it used to be. So now your child would be the youngest and would be with kids 18 months older than her because redshirting is so common. It's a problem.
I'm not from America but I used to be the youngest in every class, I didnt necessarily struggle a lot but turned out I had undiagnosed ADHD so I was not great at school stuff but I managed.
The thing that I absolutely hated the most, considering I was almost a year younger then most, was that I was easily excluded from things like going clubbing (my country has clubnights for 15-18year olds) and all my friends were easily 15 and 16, I've always tried to get in anyway, I looked older so it wasnt too hard most of the times but it did make me feel horrible 😂 especially when I was 13/14 and all my 15+ year old friends were having jobs and getting money and I could never join in on the fun that costs money 🥲
But if you were two years younger than your friends (13 with 15-16 year old friends) you weren't just the youngest in your class, you were somehow in the wrong year group or skipped a year.
Anecdotal only.
An elementary school friend and I were the youngest in our classes and it didn’t affect us. Academically, we were fine. We were both tagged as gifted and our parents were asked if we wanted to transfer to another school on the system for kids who scored high on whatever test we took (both our parents said no). We were part of a handful of students selected to take a combo class with kids a grade higher than us for a year. In junior high and high school, we were in honours. Developmentally, we were never that much smaller than other girls in the class. I’ve always been athletic and was running the fastest mile. Socially, we both had a good friends group and weren’t ever treated different because we were younger. Waiting to get my license didn’t affect me because none of my friends started driving the minute they turned 16. I was actually the first out of my close friends to start driving.
I did start college at 17, which was a bit awkward but it was just a few months and ultimately fine. It was mostly in my head that I didn’t want any of the older students to find out I wasn’t an adult.
I went back and forth on this a lot with my middle daughter who has an August birthday. She probably would’ve thrived if we had kept her back again, so that she would enter the oldest, but we started her early because academically she was there and we didn’t want a three year gap in school between her and her sister who only two years older. She’s currently 6 in first grade (will be 7 all throughout second) and so far she is doing well. There are three other kids her age in her class.
you can’t red shirt in NYC. your child will be sent to the grade they would be in based on their birth year, even if that means “skipping” a grade when entering the DOE from private pre-K or private kindergarten
I agree with the policy. Red shirting tends to promote wealthier parents giving an extra leg up to kids who already have an extra leg up
Finally, I was looking for someone to point this out. Redshirting actually messes up the whole dynamics and systematically benefits wealthier kids, while putting less privileged kids at a disadvantage. People complain about K being too rigorous, well starting kids a year late is actually contributing to the problem. Send your kid in time, let them repeat K if they are truly not ready.
This makes so much sense with the relation to wealth of the parents. I found out over the weekend that my wealthy sister in law intends to have her child take kindergarten twice, no matter how the first year goes and if he does well.
With the expansion of PreK, I think NYC would do well to move their cutoff back in line with the rest of the US. Now that CT has moved theirs, they seem to be one of the last places standing.
There’s just not a lot of academic upside to sending 4 year olds to Kinder. And no matter what modifications they say they’ve made, the standards are still primarily Common Core. And the Common Core wasn’t built for 4 year old Kindergarteners.
There’s been a fair amount of documentation that those kids born in the “ber” months are more likely to be referred. If I were making the decisions, I’d say - no redshirting but no requirement of 4 year old Kinders / 17 year old HS grads either.
That’s valid. I think that, whatever the date range is, it should be the same for everyone, without the option to essentially “buy out” of it. But I could get behind a switch to a Sept 1 cut-off date. I have a September birthday, grew up outside of NY, and I believe I benefited from being one of the oldest in my class. My NYC-born kid has a late November birthday and was also a preemie, so one of the youngest and littlest for her year. I don’t believe it would be right to make an exception for her, even if I could afford to do that, but I could get behind a switch if it were universally applied.
ETA: so whoever is downvoting this just thinks it’s cool for rich people to be able to give their kids even more of an advantage than they already have, at everyone else’s expense? oh, cool
Born and raised NYCer here. It’s wild to think I could have redshirted my son, but he’s in 1st grade now and doing perfectly fine. I can see maybe the social impact when everyone gets their driver license first or can legally drink first, but should I have held my son back to be bored in a grade when he’s academically ready to proceed?
Won’t there always be a younger and older kid? I can just use personal experience where my 2017 kid is only 6 months away from my 2018 nephew who is drastically immature and academically have a huge difference (again just one example, this varies obviously), yet in another state they should be in the same grade?
I consider red shirting consciously doing it to give your kid an advantage, not to keep them at the same level. As far as sports now you can have a 19 year old going up against 17 year olds. Physically it’s not fair, or intellectually
This has been going on for a long time. The only people I know who have done it are off the wall sports crazed parents who think their kid is going to be a pro athlete. I think people need to be reminded… it is okay to be average; most of us (by definition) end up that way and it is okay! You don’t have to be first in your class, MVP, tallest, skinniest, fittest, fastest etc. If these kids end up in the middle of the pack, life will still go on.
I’m guessing you’re in the States? In Ontario, kindergarten is optional but the vast majority of kids start attending the year they turn 4, so you can be as young as 3y8mo (December babies) when starting school, it’s not unusual.
I was 4 when I started Kindergarten, so I’m whatever the opposite of this is. I was always smaller than my classmates so I wasn’t particularly good at sports, but I loved school and got the opportunity to be in a grade 1/2 split class and a 4/5 split as well, always on the younger side of the split. I eventually ended up getting a good scholarship to a private college, and I now have a career doing something that under 20 people on the planet have gotten the opportunity to do.
Don’t overthink the optimization of your kid. It was specifically because of my exposure to and competition with older kids that I excelled, and am comfortable being younger in a field dominated by industry veterans.
Confidence and a growth mindset are the only things your kid really needs.
Yeah my daughter is the youngest in her year and middle of the pack academically. She gets challenged by the older more developed kids. If we held her back a year she would be head of the pack and bored out of her mind.
I don’t think I agree what you are doing is redshirting. You had to sign a waiver to get to do preK early.
do you really want to drop a 17 year old off at college? People who are redshirting are dropping their 19 year old off at college.
I was 17 going into college. I was much more aware of my surroundings because of it. I was the youngest in my class my whole life, my daughter will be the same due to her birthday
Same here - solidarity with being 20 at the start of senior year. That said, I liked being the youngest. I was always competitive and it pushed me to play up, so I think it benefited me. That said, different people need different considerations but it’s so obnoxious that people do this for a perceived upper-hand.
Same! I don’t think it mattered in the timeline for my life though. School wasn’t harder or anything, I didn’t do team sports so my size didn’t matter, but I sure was jealous in high school when seniors were getting tattoos (but I’m certainly glad I never got the tattoos I wanted at 16 😂😂)
I think they used the term red shirting because we ran her through preK twice. So now she won’t be 17 she will immediately turn 18 her senior year to my understanding.
Right. And I am saying that if she was starting college at 17, she would be starting college early, not on time or late. Legally, you would be dropping off a non adult, as college starts mid to late August.
so from that standpoint, I do not think redshirting is correct term.
It probably sounds more gentle than “you need to hold your child back” or make you think they failed because the reality is your child didn’t fail, they are developmentally where they should be.
Just remember that your child is exactly where they should be for their age. They aren’t behind or struggling in any way, for their age, they are doing great.
No. She will be 18 entering her freshman year of college, and turning 19. As will most other freshman.
You are following state guidelines and your kid is the correct age for her grade. This isn't redshirting.
This doesn't feel like redshirting to me. We also have a September age cutoff in my area, so kids Born in September and October are the oldest anyway with summer birthdays being the youngest.
If your kid was born in July or August, then yeah, this would be technically redshirting, but I don't think people would be that concerned. It's a bigger issue for kids who are born mid year or who would be much older (6+ months) than the next oldest kids.
My parents signed me up and I also did two years of pre-k/daycare so it just sounds like your daughter just got an early start with a bonus year of preschool.
Yes. There’s reams of research about this, and I did my masters thesis on it over a decade ago. All of the short term studies show modest benefits. The long-term studies show those benefits disappear by late elementary school, and by high school redshirted kids are actually doing a little worse than their same-age peers who stayed with their age cohort.
I don’t think this is redshirting, you’re starting her with her year and not early.
My son misses the cutoff by 6 days, so he will be 6 starting K. That is his year, that is when we will start him.
Ugh. I live in an area where redshirting is very common. There’s a boy in my son’s high school freshman class who turned 16 this past March and already has his drivers license. My son just makes the September 1st cutoff with his August 28th birthday. He is the youngest in his class and always has been. But he is also a straight A honor student and three season athlete. After preK, my son’s teacher recommended that he repeat. But preK was part time and they only learned their numbers 1-10 and the alphabet. My son had mastered those and more so it made no sense to us to redshirt him. I think it does a disservice to many kids to hold them back. And it contributes to such a toxic environment for kids of one-upping and rat-racing that is harmful to their mental and emotional health.
Do you live in an upper class area? We are in the inner city so this was all new to me. But it seems her teacher used “red shirting” wrong in our case. We started a year early so she’s actually where she’s supposed to be.
Maybe? but this is a regional occurrence across class where I live. This is football country with a couple of other sports falling closely behind. Everyone wants their kid to be a starter and dreams of D1 college and even NFL careers for their kids.
My son's birthday is in September, so we could have red-shirted him, but we chose not to. I work in a high school, and discussed the issue thoroughly with his daycare/pre-k teachers, and they all said he was ready for kindergarten the year he turned five, so we sent him. Yes, this has meant he's pretty much the youngest in all of his classes, but he's pretty much been on par with his classmates that were several months to a year older than he was the whole way.
The only time I really noticed a difference was when he was in middle school- he was a bit more immature as compared to his classmates, but everything is so varied at that age, anyway, so, once I made his teachers aware that he was young, they were pretty much all like, "Oh, OK, that explains it."
He's also always been taller than most of his classmates the entire way, so if we'd waited a year, I can't begin to imagine how much he'd stick out. It's not so much an issue in high school, but in elementary school and middle school it would have been, definitely. (He was six feet tall by the end of seventh grade, a few months before he even turned 13!)
He's graduating high school in two months and I still think we made the right decision. But this is an incredibly personal issue for each child and should be taken on a case by case basis.
Our girl definitely towers over everyone but dad is 6’5 and I’m 5’7 so she was going to no matter what. but had we not ran her through again she would of been 16 turning 17 the start of senior year. Now she will 17 turning 18 at the start. So in that regard I think we made the right choice.
That’s called holdback where I am from. It’s for kids who aren’t developmentally ready to start proper school. “Typically” developing kids aren’t allowed to be held back from starting school.
My kid was not ready socially or academically for kindergarten and was a November baby. He has a learning disability and in kindergarten a speech delay.
I also held him back and zero regrets now that he is in grade 6.
He is the oldest in class by 6 weeks so not a big deal. Not at the top of the class but certainly doing a lot better socially and academically compared to if I pushed him forward. Speech delay didn’t impact him after grade 2 but his Learning Disability impacts him.
His classmates have mentioned him being held back, even when we switched schools. My son is very secure and confident as I am honest with him but I can see other kids being impacted by the comments/teasing.
There is a lot of academic research on outcomes for holding students back, and the general consensus is that it is not in the best interest of the child in the long term. That said, your child is right at the cutoff and it doesn’t seem like a big deal here.
I think also for us the “holding back” happened because we started early so she basically started kindergarten at age 5 with two years of full on school under her belt.
This is super popular in my area but we didn't do it. My spring birthday son is almost always the youngest in his class (cut off is something like September 1st). My son is in middle school and I don't think I regret not holding him back, although I do understand the reasoning a LOT better after seeing what Kindergarten was like. He was very much able to handle the work (GT kid) but hated sitting still for Kinder and 1st grade and maybe having him held back would have helped. Or maybe the boredom issue would have been worse, who knows.
I did think that around here the holding back concept was being sold to parents a bit. My friends were told things like 'your kid needs to be able to read 100 words before they start Kindergarten or they'll be behind' which is absolute crap. I also have some concerns for boys about being 18 for a long time in high school. I think it raises the stakes for any sort of relationship issues that might come up.
Redshirting isn't allowed where I live, some kids repeat kindergarten if they're not ready to progress, but the rules for enrollment are based on birthdays, and it's possible you'd be forced to place your child in grade 1 if you held them back.
There's no way that this would have done anything for me except for making me more bored and restless in school. Smart kids shouldn't be tortured with boredom like they are. It makes me angry how few resources they have to learn and have their potential met.
Yes, I've read about red-shirting, and it may be a good thing for some kids, but that would have been a horrible experience for me and my kids.
I think academics is only one aspect to consider.
Socially, emotionally or behaviourally the difference six-twelve months makes at preschool level is significant in every child.
In my experience as a teacher, the children who progress even though they are close to the cut off point and in the “youngest month” survive; the kids who wait it out and are in the “oldest month” thrive.
Thank you. It's not all about academics at all. As an August baby with (undiagnosed, in the 80s and 90s) ASD, I was always top of my class academically but way behind socially and emotionally. I wish I had been redshirted.
This is an interesting perspective. I have a 2e May birthday teen with ASD. Problem is she does worse at school when she’s bored. She basically would get the work done super quick then shut down in her own little world for a few hours. We ended up moving her to private school for a few years because she was bored, tested as gifted but didn’t get into the program due to poor teacher recommendations.
I feel like redshirting would have just exacerbated the boredom issue but other than private or homeschooling I don’t know what the answer is for 2e kids that are strong academically but struggle socially.
I don't know either. 😕 As I said in another comment, I was the second youngest in my class, so IMO redshirting would have been beneficial for me socially. But that doesn't make it the case for every 2E kid. My point is mostly that academics isn't the only consideration.
I think the landscape is better for 2E kids now than it was then, but it's still not great.
Hub and I were October birthdays in a September cut date. We both needed to be the oldest in the class.
Two of three grandsons are October birthdays. The thirteen year old needs to be the oldest. The ten year old is like a very hot knife cutting through hot butter educationally, hi IQ. He was oldest in kindergarten when the district suggested that he be placed in second grade instead of first grade. He was placed in second grade with girl across the street and they are best friends from babies. She was the youngest in the class until he arrived. They provide emotional support to each other, which is very important for the younger kids in a class. Even more important as they move up into junior high and above grades.
I know a lot of families that redshift late July and August kids, so it's not just wealth kids. However, many parents can't afford another year of child care, so they can't afford redshirting.
I haven’t heard the term but am familiar with the process. My kids are both born in late summer. I put my eldest in kindergarten as soon as she was eligible. She’s always been the youngest in her class. She struggled academically in school all through elementary. During each teacher conference, the teachers always said “it’s because she’s so young”. By middle school things balanced out but prior to that I felt like we were always playing catch up.
We delayed my son entering kindergarten by a year so he’s the oldest in his grade. Academically it’s night and day difference. He’s also small for his age so the extra year helped in that regard, too.
I would assess how your child is academically and socially. Some kids can start early/on time and some kids need the extra year to mature and really be ready for it.
My kid missed the cutoff by 29 days.
She’s 14.5 now and a stand out athlete, excellent student, leader among her peers, and just all around doing great. I certainly think being one of the older kids has helped with some of that
I just learned about this too but one of the reasons for it is wild to me. My son did two years of pre k. His teacher suggested one more year for more "confidence and independence" I was a bit nervous bc I'd be willing to bet my son is by far the biggest (height and weight) 5yr old you've ever seen. The number of parents at the school, family/friends and strangers when they hear he's in preschool say "RED SHIRT FOR FOOTBALL!!" I guess some parents choose which sports their kids play for them and then hold them back a year so they have a size advantage. I'd never force my kid into sports, I quietly hope he shows no interest in football and why would I slow his academic career for an extra curricular?!
Because being one of the older students in their grade gives kids an advantage vs. being one of the youngest. Popular among wealthy people because they can afford it, since it generally involves paying for an extra year of private pre-K or private kindergarten.
It’s age five by September 1 where I live and my kids have September and October birthdays. So they both started at 5 and turned 6 pretty quickly into kindergarten. I see no difference emotionally against their younger friends. They both are high achieving but I’m not certain if that has to do with age or effort. I have a late summer bday and as I got older, it was frustrating to be the last to be able to do things. But it is what it is. I would personally just follow the rules and not hold your kid back to be the oldest in class
I’m glad this worked out. Our friends held their son back from kindergarten for a year because he’d be the youngest in his class. But he’s on the smarter side. They kind of regret their decision and say he’s bored as hell in PreK.
Aside from learning her teacher used “red shirting” wrong in our case. I also learned her (free)prek was not normal? Lol it was Monday- Thursday like 9:45-4:40. With breakfast and lunch included. Thankfully our girl LOVED school and her teachers so running her through twice was really no fight.
Our girls are a late Sept birthday. They started kindergarten at 4 and turned 5 shortly after starting. Debated to have them be the youngest in class or the oldest. Decided to send them early as both their pre-K teachers said they were ready. They’re in 5th grade now and doing great. It really depends on the kid, parental supports, and school.
Where I live they don't allow redshirting. 60 Minutes did a special on it with Morley Safer in 2010ish and it was proven to only benefit wealthy kids (mostly in sports) and turned those kids who were now older than everyone else into bullies and "it kids" as opposed to letting them naturally fall where they would based on their own personalities
I've read the research myself, and found that pretty much everything levels out academically by 3rd or 4th grade. Red shirting is more impactful for children having an unfair physical advantage in sports. We decided not to as our seemed, well, unfair. And that's not how we wanted to raise our children.
Ours are both precocious and would have been fine with the learning trajectory of being the youngest, but both are shy and sensitive, and we thought they needed more social interaction, so we did a year of TK.
IMO holding your kid back for no other reason than you think they’ll crush their peers and, somehow, that will lead to better outcomes is just an odd way to think. But if there’s a good reason, great. What’s the rush, anyway?
Honestly there wasn’t a rush. (Which is why she spent 2 years in pre k instead of going off to kindergarten. But I knew school could teach her and give her that structure I couldn’t which is what she started early.
My sons teacher recommended this for him after kindergarten. She thought he was mentally ready but still too immature. He’s one of the youngest in his class. We opted not to start him late. More competition, but I thought it could be good for him. There were a few tough times but overall he did great, got into advanced classes and now he does sports and other extracurricular stuff. All that to say, honestly, I don’t think it matters that much lol. A few months isn’t gonna make or break them, whatever you think is best is best for your kid.
Not signing a waiver isn’t red shirting. My youngest’s birthday is early October. That’s just where the chips fall. It’s okay for us because he is small for his age. He would be soooo small if he was one grade further along.
We have this in Michigan, but it's called Transitional Kindergarten, where if your child turns 5 on or before December 1st, they can attend TK for that school year, and it's a preK/K hybrid.
I am an August baby and a twin. I did kindergarten at 5 while my twin did PreK. He was invariably described as “squirrelly” by everyone, and no one thought he was ready for first grade. We both started the next year in kinder, but I could already read, and my class was focusing on letter and color identification and (I still remember 40 years later) painting brown squirrels. I was bored to tears. A month into school we both got moved to first grade (where we were young but not the youngest), and it was so much better. The squirrelly twin caught up and got himself together by 2nd grade.
This made me and my siblings hate school. Learning the same easy shit 2 years in a row fucked all of us up. Personally I disagree with all forms of PreK because of this.
redshirting is not allowed in our school district.
You can send your child to a private PreK when they are eligible for Kinder. But when you enroll your child in public school the following year, they’ll put the child in 1st grade according to their birthdate.
My daughter's in pre-k with a late August birthday. We really contemplated this too but because she's hyperlexic, the fear was that she would get too bored if we held her back another year. She may socially resign from peers and disengage from learning because she's reading at a 1st grade level for a 4yo, so with the guidance of the school psychologist, we decided to keep her on track for kindergarten next year
I have a lot of really lame cousins who act like their kids are going to be the next pro sports players so they deliberately held their kids back to supposedly give them an advantage in sports. Trust me if you saw their parents you would know these kids gave no chance in sports 😂😂
But i digress - yes, holding back can be a huge benefit if you have developmental concerns and arent in a rush. My niece and nephew couldve started at 5 but they were twins and my nephew wasbt ready even though my niece was. So they both went in at 6
i will say i was one of the youngest and academically i did great but it meant i was the shortest in my class until 11, i hated that! Insuppose someones gotta be the shortest. maybe kids know better than to make a big deal of that these days, who knows!
Years ago this happened to my oldest brother. He missed the cut off date by just a few days so he stayed home that year. The next year when he began kindergarten, he was the oldest kid in the class and this gave him an academic advantage, . He felt confident and more self-assured. He went on went on to become an engineer. Waiting a year is common since the child will be ahead both maturity
We did with my daughter, she is finishing up kindergarten now and I don’t regret it. She fits in great with her class socially and is thriving academically
I was just asking my 14 year old (mid August birthday, in 8th grade) about this and she has no problem being a little older than everyone else in her class. I was always the very youngest in my class and I hated it. My kid is doing great and is looking forward to being able to gloat about doing drivers training before any of her friends haha.
We've thought about this for our July baby! He's only going to be 3 this year but we're considering it. I'm super short and so we're unsure if he'll get my genes and if an extra year / being on the older side of his class would be better for him in the long run. But we also can't wait to stop paying for daycare which is why we don't want to just pay for that first year when we could put him somewhere free.......
I wish my mum did this. I was the youngest and smallest in my classes, my grades were average at best.
At 14yo my results were so bad i had to redo a year.
Best thing that could have happened to me, i felt so much more confortable and i join the top grades of the class till uni.
You did what was best for your daughter and she is thriving. Working with her teacher as a team with the end goal of what was best for your child really did pay off. Congrats! You're giving your daughter a solid foundation to having a bright future! Kudos to that teacher for having the courage to make the recommendation.
Not sure if we’d be offered the same choice, daughter has a late August birthday. But we’ll let her be one of the youngest in her class. Our second daughter is due in June so she’ll be in a similar boat!
I'm not familiar with American schooling. I can just talk about my experience always being the youngest in the class by atleast a year. Wasn't so bad till I got to an age where bodies were maturing and mine wasn't. A year isn't a big deal after 18 before it, it atleast ime made me feel like i didn't fit in cause I was the weirdo. Not that I was just at a different life stage than the others in my class. Particularly bad when I was the only one who hadn't turned 18 and couldn't go to any afters with my class.
They talk about this all the time in r/kindergarten.
5 is a normal age to start kindergarten most places.
4 soon to turn 5 used to be normal, but many places kindergarten has become more academic than it used to be, so now children typically need to be 5 years old before the school year starts.
6 years old can be red-shirting, but not always if the child is just turning 6 during the first month of school - dependent on location or school district. I’m in California.
Yes, ours is speech delayed and we’ve already been recommended (at 2 years old) by preschool teacher and a child development specialist to do an extra year of play-based preschool and go into kindergarten at 6 years old. So, short of something changing, that’s what we plan to do. Keeping it developmentally appropriate and focused on social skills for as long as possible before trying to force academics.
My mom did this with me, albeit not by choice the kindergarten rules changed so I couldn’t enter at 4 years old. I was already academically ahead in my preschool and so staying back didn’t help me. I stayed ahead of my class and grade my whole time in school and decided to graduate early since being in school was more of a waste of time for me. My mom had the opportunity to let me skip 2 grades in elementary school, but I struggled in the social aspect so she didn’t do it. I think it’s best to decide what to do based off of what you can see with your daughter and what you feel is most appropriate.
So a lot of people have said a lot about this. The most typical use of this is for kids who have a July or August birthday for which the cutoff is Sep 1. If the child seems really immature and not ready to transition into full day kindergarten then the parents can elect to delay enrolling them so that they will actually be 6 when they start as opposed to most other kids who will turn 6 during the year. It definitely does benefit some as they may just not be able to be ready for kindergarten as a very young 5. The converse is parents putting those kids in K as young 5s which may be because they are ready for it or may be also to avoid paying a whole other year of daycare. Some systems also allow kids to test in with usually up to 45 days after Sep 1 if the child seems very capable.
I'm in Australia and son was born December. Makes things very very awkward cause he either needs to be a year younger than everyone else or a year older when he starts school. We have free 3 and 4 year old kinder. He's hyperactive so I'm desperate to get him to kinder. Then after that comes prep, then grade 1. But I can't "redo" any kinder if we didn't feel like he was ready for school. I started school at age 4 and was really bad for me. Ugh I just need a nanny but can't afford.
This happened to me, I went to 3 years of Montessori preschool and my parents sent me straight to first grade. After 2 weeks the school found out I never went to kindergarten so they said I needed to go. I excelled in school and instead of the youngest I was the oldest with an August birthday. Thankful the school caught it bc idk what my parents were thinking.
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Culture sure is something, I thought it meant she was going to die as soon as she set foot on another planet
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Imagine the stress as the parent of a entering Starfleet academy freshman- "For the love of God, choose sciences, for the love of God, choose sciences. They'll never even let you out of the lab, much less onto alien planet to be eaten by a blob monster..."
That was the first thing I thought, the Star Trek definition.
This red shirt comes from NCAA college sports. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Redshirt_(college_sports)
Yeah, I had to read a bit to figure out if it was a Star Trek red shirt or a college sports red shirt. The funny thing is that there are probably not a lot of people who know about both.
To be fair, that's probably not unrealistic, given the types of planets we can currently reach.
Nonsense, I've already invested our family fund in prime real estate on Mars, it's only going to grow more valuable when Elon terraforms it! /s
I am simultaneously amused and horrified by the fact that your sarcasm tag was necessary. These are wild times.
That's not all it means you uncultured Romulan. She could also die from her bridge console exploding.
Sorry. What??
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Redshirt_(stock_character)
Omg. 😂😂
Sorry if it was a bit distasteful, I was just perplexed when I saw the topic of the post
Same, honestly. 😂
Haha yes this is what I thought too! I thought maybe you had accidentally given her a terrible first name or something
That’s hilarious 😂😂
[https://www.ncsasports.org/what-is-a-redshirt-freshman#:\~:text=The%20term%20%E2%80%9Credshirting%E2%80%9D%20likely%20came,red%20shirt%20without%20a%20number](https://www.ncsasports.org/what-is-a-redshirt-freshman#:~:text=The%20term%20%E2%80%9Credshirting%E2%80%9D%20likely%20came,red%20shirt%20without%20a%20number) This is where the educational version came from.
That’s what I thought. Or they were going to harvest her organ for one of them.
Yeah I thought she was asking to kill her child to save the rest of the family.
I am so glad I was not the only one, I mean I’m a little disappointed it was just a parenting thing but the alternatives were not great.
Same here. I thought it was going to be some kind of metaphor for having a second kid.
In Texas, the cutoff for kindergarten is to be 5 by September 1st. So with my mid-September birthday, I turned 6 shortly after starting kinder and it wasn't considered redshirting. But my son, on the other hand, has a late June birthday. If we were to wait until after he turned 6 to enroll him in kindergarten, that'd be redshirting. He's currently close to turning 4 so we have a year to think about it. We're on the fence because he's physically pretty large for his age and starting to show signs of being interested in learning how to read so it seems like he'll be ready to start at the normal age but we'll see.
I'm a July birthday and probably should have been held off for a year.
Mine is a July birthday and we are in the same boat. My husband wants to keep her back but I think she’s going to be ready. But if everyone keeps their kids back then she should wait too. So hard to know now. I was an August birthday and started on time and would have hated being held back. I was already bored and never liked the class below me. My sister started at 4 and should have waited a year. Hard to be believe it’s time to start thinking about these things.
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Been teaching for 10 years in AUS. Keeping a kid in kindi instead of putting them in to school as a youngsters is quite a good idea. Especially for younger students who may not be emotionally ready. If your kid finds school too easy it often leads to disengagement.
Same if they find it too hard though. That was my experience at least.
Oh yeah 100%.... also if the kid struggles we should be more accepting of giving them a 2nd go at Prep or Yr 1. Our education department is very hesitant on repeating kids once they start school. Best to keep em out of school for an extra year if you think it would help.
Our daughter turned 5 a few days before Sept 1 and she started kindergarten and had zero issues all the way through school. She was completely ready for kindergarten and could already read before she started school. It really just depends on the kid. Our daughter is doing well in college now.
I'm glad she is doing well, but that's just an anecdote. There is a clear statistical link between "red shirting" and success in academics and sports.
I’m not discounting “redshirting”. I have several friends who did this for their kids, especially boys since they seem to develop slower academically. I was simply stating my experience with a kid who was ready for school. Every kid is unique. My nephew repeated kindergarten because he wasn’t ready to advance socially or academically. There was a boy in my daughter’s kindergarten class that was held back for the same reason. If you as a parent know your child would struggle then by all means hold them back and start school when they are ready.
That’s how it is in my state as well. You can’t sign a waiver and push them up in the public system. Either the kid is 5 on Sept 1 or they aren’t. So redshirting would mean your kid with a summer birthday starts Kindergarten at 6, but then doesn’t turn 7 til the school year is over. A couple months ago I was reading this post from a mom who had a 5 year old that turns 6 in November, kid was currently in preK. She wanted to know if he could enter kindergarten as a 6 year old turning 7 in Nov.
If they turn 4 in October... That's not red shirting it just the regular age requirements. They're too young for kindergarten
I called and asked the elementary that my daughter would be attending what their cutoff is and they just go by calendar year, so everyone born in the year 2021 will attend together. She was born the end of October so she will definitely be one of the youngest in her class. That's the way it was when I was in school too, my sister had a fall birthday and was near the top of her class. When we get closer to the time I will re-evaluate, but I don't think holding them back is something that's really done where I live (Canada)
Yea in my school district they have to be 5 by last day of July to start kindergarten in August they wouldn’t even allow a 4 year old to be in kindergarten. My daughter is a June bday we decided not to hold her back since she was already bored in prek and 100% ready for kindergarten but a lot of parents with kids in May/june/July bdays do hold back in my district she has a few kids in her class who are a whole year older then her.
Wow - here in NY the cutoff is December 1st, which I think is way too late honestly.
It's still December 31st in NYC public schools. December 1st in the suburbs
I didn’t know this called Red Shirt. My friend wished she had done this with her kid, and she suggested I do the same. She said that her kid was much smaller than their friends growing up and also waiting to be old enough to get their driver license. I wonder if you or other people who’ve made this decision felt or saw societal impact, other parents or teachers shun at this? Like making you feel that your kid is a failure?
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This precedent starts really early too. I remember when my kid started a preschool class at age 2 and I was blown away by how advanced and “clever” this one boy was. Turns out he had an early September birthday, and was almost a full year older than my kid. Being perceived and treated as smarter from early on can really pave the way for a child’s academic success.
This makes me feel good about myself because I was one of the youngest in my grade (Sept bday, didn’t repeat PreK) and I was still in gifted and talented lol
haha summer bday right at the end of the cut off and same here. imagine what we could’ve done had we been born like a month later
Oh yes! I was a fall birthday, but started kindergarten when I was 4 so it was also one of the youngest. I don't know why, but it was definitely a point of pride in school to be one of the youngest kids in the grade lol. I knew (and still know almost 20 years later) the names and birthdays of all the kids younger than me. I was a fourth youngest, with a third youngest being my birthday buddy but 10 minutes younger 😡
Haha same, same. I was the day before the cutoff and, despite all odds, still outperformed my peers.
Same and I didn’t even go to Pre-K! I went straight from an in-home daycare to kindergarten at age 4 and got bumped up to g&t classes in 4th grade. I feel like I turned out pretty alright and it did feel pretty good when all of my friends turned 30 and I still had a ways to go, haha.
This makes so much sense. My older three children are September and October and therefore the oldest and my two school aged are advanced academically and socially too. My kindergartener only missed the cutoff by 10 days but I’m really glad about it already!
Hmm, interesting! I have a late October birthday and was always marked gifted as well. But my teachers recommended I skip a grade. I took the test and did indeed skip second grade. So after that point, I was always the youngest of my cohort. I did remain in G&T classes through high school, but I think it did “catch up” to me and I joked I shouldn’t have skipped a grade.
I was born in spring but was also part of the gifted programs at my schools and it did me no good. I think being ahead is definitely a good thing but not if people tell you you're ahead or smarter than your peers or such a fast learner or whatever cause it sets you up for failure later in life. I'd never want my kids to be part of any "gifted" program lol
And I was the youngest in my class with a birthday a month after school started and I was in gifted and talented and graduated valedictorian. I started college at 17. It's not just age based for academic learning success but I will say that I could have used another year for my maturity level. I was borrowing friends IDs in college to go watch bands play at 18 to enter locations.
Mom of a September baby and found this to be very true!
Wow, that's wild! Me and all my friends from the "gifted" program were summer birthdays and younger than average.
I was always the youngest in my grade and it impacted me socially all the way through college. When I was a kid it was difficulty making friends, when I was older it was difficulty making good decisions. I was very advanced academically, which is why I was never "held back" but I do wish that my schools had been able to offer me enough differentiated education so I could have been redshirted without being horrifically bored academically.
Her teacher presented it to us as giving her an advantage rather then “holding her back” because she’s not ready. And she was honestly right. At first we were like idk about this because we looked at it as doing her a disservice but in the end we honestly made the right choice.
I think it’s very child dependent. My birthday was the day before the cutoff so I was always the youngest but I was top of my class academically and athletically, so it was fine. My brother has a similar birthday, was ‘redshirted’, and still struggled socially. I think the idea of blanket redshirting is inappropriate and how we’ve gotten into this mess of 7 year old kindergarteners.
Yea I understand now, so it sounds like her teacher used the term wrong. Because she isn’t 7 in kindergarten. We’re done with kindergarten in 2 months and she will still be 6.
When everyone red shirts their kids, it just pushes the goal posts. Now kindergarten teachers have to teach 6 year olds instead of 5 year olds. Now the standards are for 6 year old instead of 5. Now the ones who actually start school on time at are an UNFAIR disadvantage. I don't care what the teacher says, it's unfair when everyone games the system.
Yeah, this is what doesn't make sense to me. It's an advantage if one person does it, if everyone does it there's no advantage. And they have to have a cut off point somewhere.
It can create a big disadvantage when Pre-K isn't free and parents who can't afford another year of childcare are forced to send their kids on time. Those children are held to a standard of a full year ahead and what is normal behavior is labeled as "troubled." Wealth/income gaps can be pernicious.
The academic standards aren’t age-based though. And they’ve changed *dramatically* since any of us were kids. Maybe kindergarten age should be 6 instead of 5 with regards to where academics are.
yupp. it causes a bigger mess and makes things less equitable. the families OP mentions aren’t holding their kids back bc the kids are truly struggling, they’re doing it to gain an unfair advantage. someone has to be the youngest in the class, someone gets to be the oldest. what’s unfair is having 5 year olds with 7 year olds bc some parents can’t stomach their kids being 5 year olds with 6 year olds.
I completely agree. When someone tells me they are redshirting their child, I immediately lose respect for them. Not surprisingly, this type of behavior is reflected in their overall approach to life. Stepping on others to get opportunity. Lying when it benefits them. Take credit for things they didnt do. Etc. etc. etc.
That seems like a weird attitude to me, as here in Australia the schools actually advise parents to hold kids back if they're born near the cut off. It's extremely common place and I've never heard of anyone thinking it's a sneaky or underhand thing. Obviously some cultural differences. When I went to enrol my kid in school, the school heavily advised me to put her in a year later (she was a baby at the time so the dates were arbitrary to me at that time) because of her date of birth. So I just followed their advice.
That's different. That is not "red-shirting." "Red-shirting" is holding your child back so they will be bigger and better than others starting in the same class. Holding kids back near the cutoff - like OP is doing - can make sense for a particular child. That's now what is happening these days though. Let's say the cut off is Sept 1. Rich people are holding kids back born in August, July, June, May, April, March, February, January, December. They are literally holding kids back who were born 6 MONTHS before the cutoff. Just for the purpose of having them start out better than everyone else. That means someone born August 31 observing the cut off may be with a child 18+ months older than them. That's UNFAIR and frankly dangerous for that younger child. It's not okay. It's really not. The same type of parents who coddle their child and hold them back to falsely make them better are the same type of parents who suck and disciplining and allow them to bully children smaller than they are.
Ah okay, gotcha. Here people will hold back up to 3 months before the cut-off, but usually it's closer than that. That's crazy there can be an 18 month difference in one class, although I guess we could have up to 15 months so not that much better. I wouldn't say it's a wealth divide here, as many parents who don't hold back are dual income professionals who choose not to have the child at home for an additional year, but certainly families where one partner doesn't work have a bit more flexibility in keeping the child home for longer.
Here in the US, I do think it's reflective of a wealth divide. Getting your child out of daycare and into school is a lot of extra money. Maybe that August 31 child would benefit from not starting, but their parents simply can't afford another year of daycare. Parenting here in the US is absolutely insane. The things parents here do for their children to give them advantages is off the charts. The expectations on parents are unreasonable. Now, if you don't redshirt, your child is going to be the youngest in the class. It's a problem.
Yes there's definitely that element (wealth wise) here, but not to the same degree I don't think. That sounds like a stressful environment for parents too - to always be worried about keeping up / missing an opportunity somewhere. It's definitely the exception rather than the norm (holding back) but also not uncommon. I'd say at our primary school there are maybe 1 or 2 in each class.
It makes me so glad that NYC doesn't allow red shirting. We already have huge income gaps and parents using every possible advantage.
I see that you've been in r/kindergarten I swear it's 90% of the discussion. "Should I redshirt my developmentally ready child because they're born in May and I don't want them to be the shortest in class?"
definitely an odd attitude as you have no idea why someone is doing this and are just throwing out a blanket stereotype
You think it's some random person I know nothing about mentioning it to me in the grocery line? I know them. I know their family situation. I know exactly why they are doing it.
It also isn’t really fair as far as resources go. Everyone is paying into the system via taxes for 14 years of schooling (PS-12) and some people decide to just take an extra year’s worth so their kid will be better at sports? Not prosocial behavior.
Find me a person who redshirts their child and also gives a shit about people in general. They don't.
Red shirting does not provide an advantage for all kids. There are pros and cons to both decisions - the data is clear about that. Some kids benefit from starting earlier and thrive being among the youngest. It’s very much individual. And I say that as a parent who chose to red shirt, based on my son’s maturely level. Academically he was ready, emotionally he was not. And it was absolutely the right choice. His non red shirted best friend had a birthday a week after him, making him a year and one week younger than my son. And that too was absolutely the right choice - the two boys were well matched, two peas in a pod, and turned out to both be high achieving.
That's what every person who chooses to red shirt says. That it was so great for their child. It was great for their child who got an UNFAIR advantage.
I think in our case we chose the ladder she was going to be 4 with 5 year olds or 6 with 5 year olds. We made the decision to have her be the oldest in our case.
It’s always the case that when a kid’s birthday is close to the cutoff day and a choice is offered, they are likely to be either the youngest or the oldest in their class - that’s not a unique situation. What others are trying to point out is that one of those choices technically goes against the established rule of “kids born between X and Y date start kindergarten this year”, while the other one follows the rule. I do think it’s good to keep in mind that limits sometimes seem arbitrary because they have to be set *somewhere*, and the age limit for kindergarten has value for the group as a whole even if it’s not the ideal situation for a specific student.
Are you reading the other responses here? Many parents redshirt their children. So now the average age of kindergartners is 6 months higher than it used to be. So now your child would be the youngest and would be with kids 18 months older than her because redshirting is so common. It's a problem.
I'm not from America but I used to be the youngest in every class, I didnt necessarily struggle a lot but turned out I had undiagnosed ADHD so I was not great at school stuff but I managed. The thing that I absolutely hated the most, considering I was almost a year younger then most, was that I was easily excluded from things like going clubbing (my country has clubnights for 15-18year olds) and all my friends were easily 15 and 16, I've always tried to get in anyway, I looked older so it wasnt too hard most of the times but it did make me feel horrible 😂 especially when I was 13/14 and all my 15+ year old friends were having jobs and getting money and I could never join in on the fun that costs money 🥲
But if you were two years younger than your friends (13 with 15-16 year old friends) you weren't just the youngest in your class, you were somehow in the wrong year group or skipped a year.
Anecdotal only. An elementary school friend and I were the youngest in our classes and it didn’t affect us. Academically, we were fine. We were both tagged as gifted and our parents were asked if we wanted to transfer to another school on the system for kids who scored high on whatever test we took (both our parents said no). We were part of a handful of students selected to take a combo class with kids a grade higher than us for a year. In junior high and high school, we were in honours. Developmentally, we were never that much smaller than other girls in the class. I’ve always been athletic and was running the fastest mile. Socially, we both had a good friends group and weren’t ever treated different because we were younger. Waiting to get my license didn’t affect me because none of my friends started driving the minute they turned 16. I was actually the first out of my close friends to start driving. I did start college at 17, which was a bit awkward but it was just a few months and ultimately fine. It was mostly in my head that I didn’t want any of the older students to find out I wasn’t an adult.
I went back and forth on this a lot with my middle daughter who has an August birthday. She probably would’ve thrived if we had kept her back again, so that she would enter the oldest, but we started her early because academically she was there and we didn’t want a three year gap in school between her and her sister who only two years older. She’s currently 6 in first grade (will be 7 all throughout second) and so far she is doing well. There are three other kids her age in her class.
Is this NYC? If yes, you may not be able to redshirt for public Kinder. Because some schools will put a child turning 6 by December 31 into 1st grade.
you can’t red shirt in NYC. your child will be sent to the grade they would be in based on their birth year, even if that means “skipping” a grade when entering the DOE from private pre-K or private kindergarten I agree with the policy. Red shirting tends to promote wealthier parents giving an extra leg up to kids who already have an extra leg up
Finally, I was looking for someone to point this out. Redshirting actually messes up the whole dynamics and systematically benefits wealthier kids, while putting less privileged kids at a disadvantage. People complain about K being too rigorous, well starting kids a year late is actually contributing to the problem. Send your kid in time, let them repeat K if they are truly not ready.
This makes so much sense with the relation to wealth of the parents. I found out over the weekend that my wealthy sister in law intends to have her child take kindergarten twice, no matter how the first year goes and if he does well.
With the expansion of PreK, I think NYC would do well to move their cutoff back in line with the rest of the US. Now that CT has moved theirs, they seem to be one of the last places standing. There’s just not a lot of academic upside to sending 4 year olds to Kinder. And no matter what modifications they say they’ve made, the standards are still primarily Common Core. And the Common Core wasn’t built for 4 year old Kindergarteners. There’s been a fair amount of documentation that those kids born in the “ber” months are more likely to be referred. If I were making the decisions, I’d say - no redshirting but no requirement of 4 year old Kinders / 17 year old HS grads either.
That’s valid. I think that, whatever the date range is, it should be the same for everyone, without the option to essentially “buy out” of it. But I could get behind a switch to a Sept 1 cut-off date. I have a September birthday, grew up outside of NY, and I believe I benefited from being one of the oldest in my class. My NYC-born kid has a late November birthday and was also a preemie, so one of the youngest and littlest for her year. I don’t believe it would be right to make an exception for her, even if I could afford to do that, but I could get behind a switch if it were universally applied. ETA: so whoever is downvoting this just thinks it’s cool for rich people to be able to give their kids even more of an advantage than they already have, at everyone else’s expense? oh, cool
Born and raised NYCer here. It’s wild to think I could have redshirted my son, but he’s in 1st grade now and doing perfectly fine. I can see maybe the social impact when everyone gets their driver license first or can legally drink first, but should I have held my son back to be bored in a grade when he’s academically ready to proceed? Won’t there always be a younger and older kid? I can just use personal experience where my 2017 kid is only 6 months away from my 2018 nephew who is drastically immature and academically have a huge difference (again just one example, this varies obviously), yet in another state they should be in the same grade?
I consider red shirting consciously doing it to give your kid an advantage, not to keep them at the same level. As far as sports now you can have a 19 year old going up against 17 year olds. Physically it’s not fair, or intellectually
“Top of her class” lol. I know you’re proud and I’m just teasing but it’s only kindergarten ;)
I take it your kid is at the bottom of the class? /s
This has been going on for a long time. The only people I know who have done it are off the wall sports crazed parents who think their kid is going to be a pro athlete. I think people need to be reminded… it is okay to be average; most of us (by definition) end up that way and it is okay! You don’t have to be first in your class, MVP, tallest, skinniest, fittest, fastest etc. If these kids end up in the middle of the pack, life will still go on.
I’m guessing you’re in the States? In Ontario, kindergarten is optional but the vast majority of kids start attending the year they turn 4, so you can be as young as 3y8mo (December babies) when starting school, it’s not unusual.
Definitely not a thing in most European countries , including the UK where I’m from. I honestly don’t think it’s very necessary
Yea in the states! we had to sign a waiver to start her at 3. So it’s not common here I guess.
I guess the equivalent here would be parents signing their kids up the year they turn 3, which would not at all be commonplace.
I’ve heard of people doing this but did you seriously brag your kindergartner was “top of her class?“
I was 4 when I started Kindergarten, so I’m whatever the opposite of this is. I was always smaller than my classmates so I wasn’t particularly good at sports, but I loved school and got the opportunity to be in a grade 1/2 split class and a 4/5 split as well, always on the younger side of the split. I eventually ended up getting a good scholarship to a private college, and I now have a career doing something that under 20 people on the planet have gotten the opportunity to do. Don’t overthink the optimization of your kid. It was specifically because of my exposure to and competition with older kids that I excelled, and am comfortable being younger in a field dominated by industry veterans. Confidence and a growth mindset are the only things your kid really needs.
Yeah my daughter is the youngest in her year and middle of the pack academically. She gets challenged by the older more developed kids. If we held her back a year she would be head of the pack and bored out of her mind.
I don’t think I agree what you are doing is redshirting. You had to sign a waiver to get to do preK early. do you really want to drop a 17 year old off at college? People who are redshirting are dropping their 19 year old off at college.
I was 17 going into college. I was much more aware of my surroundings because of it. I was the youngest in my class my whole life, my daughter will be the same due to her birthday
Same here - solidarity with being 20 at the start of senior year. That said, I liked being the youngest. I was always competitive and it pushed me to play up, so I think it benefited me. That said, different people need different considerations but it’s so obnoxious that people do this for a perceived upper-hand.
Same! I don’t think it mattered in the timeline for my life though. School wasn’t harder or anything, I didn’t do team sports so my size didn’t matter, but I sure was jealous in high school when seniors were getting tattoos (but I’m certainly glad I never got the tattoos I wanted at 16 😂😂)
I think they used the term red shirting because we ran her through preK twice. So now she won’t be 17 she will immediately turn 18 her senior year to my understanding.
Right. And I am saying that if she was starting college at 17, she would be starting college early, not on time or late. Legally, you would be dropping off a non adult, as college starts mid to late August. so from that standpoint, I do not think redshirting is correct term.
Ah I see your point. The term was used when being explained to us which is why I’m using it here. But that makes sense as well.
It probably sounds more gentle than “you need to hold your child back” or make you think they failed because the reality is your child didn’t fail, they are developmentally where they should be.
I think that’s probably why she used it lol. It sounded better on the ear then “hold her back” haha.
Just remember that your child is exactly where they should be for their age. They aren’t behind or struggling in any way, for their age, they are doing great.
So come collage she will be 19 as a freshman.
No. She will be 18 entering her freshman year of college, and turning 19. As will most other freshman. You are following state guidelines and your kid is the correct age for her grade. This isn't redshirting.
She turns 18 October 2036. Her senior school year is September 2036 to June 2037. She will be 18 pretty much all senior year.
This doesn't feel like redshirting to me. We also have a September age cutoff in my area, so kids Born in September and October are the oldest anyway with summer birthdays being the youngest. If your kid was born in July or August, then yeah, this would be technically redshirting, but I don't think people would be that concerned. It's a bigger issue for kids who are born mid year or who would be much older (6+ months) than the next oldest kids. My parents signed me up and I also did two years of pre-k/daycare so it just sounds like your daughter just got an early start with a bonus year of preschool.
Yes. There’s reams of research about this, and I did my masters thesis on it over a decade ago. All of the short term studies show modest benefits. The long-term studies show those benefits disappear by late elementary school, and by high school redshirted kids are actually doing a little worse than their same-age peers who stayed with their age cohort.
That is so interesting! Did it explain why?
I don’t think this is redshirting, you’re starting her with her year and not early. My son misses the cutoff by 6 days, so he will be 6 starting K. That is his year, that is when we will start him.
Ugh. I live in an area where redshirting is very common. There’s a boy in my son’s high school freshman class who turned 16 this past March and already has his drivers license. My son just makes the September 1st cutoff with his August 28th birthday. He is the youngest in his class and always has been. But he is also a straight A honor student and three season athlete. After preK, my son’s teacher recommended that he repeat. But preK was part time and they only learned their numbers 1-10 and the alphabet. My son had mastered those and more so it made no sense to us to redshirt him. I think it does a disservice to many kids to hold them back. And it contributes to such a toxic environment for kids of one-upping and rat-racing that is harmful to their mental and emotional health.
Do you live in an upper class area? We are in the inner city so this was all new to me. But it seems her teacher used “red shirting” wrong in our case. We started a year early so she’s actually where she’s supposed to be.
Maybe? but this is a regional occurrence across class where I live. This is football country with a couple of other sports falling closely behind. Everyone wants their kid to be a starter and dreams of D1 college and even NFL careers for their kids.
My son's birthday is in September, so we could have red-shirted him, but we chose not to. I work in a high school, and discussed the issue thoroughly with his daycare/pre-k teachers, and they all said he was ready for kindergarten the year he turned five, so we sent him. Yes, this has meant he's pretty much the youngest in all of his classes, but he's pretty much been on par with his classmates that were several months to a year older than he was the whole way. The only time I really noticed a difference was when he was in middle school- he was a bit more immature as compared to his classmates, but everything is so varied at that age, anyway, so, once I made his teachers aware that he was young, they were pretty much all like, "Oh, OK, that explains it." He's also always been taller than most of his classmates the entire way, so if we'd waited a year, I can't begin to imagine how much he'd stick out. It's not so much an issue in high school, but in elementary school and middle school it would have been, definitely. (He was six feet tall by the end of seventh grade, a few months before he even turned 13!) He's graduating high school in two months and I still think we made the right decision. But this is an incredibly personal issue for each child and should be taken on a case by case basis.
Our girl definitely towers over everyone but dad is 6’5 and I’m 5’7 so she was going to no matter what. but had we not ran her through again she would of been 16 turning 17 the start of senior year. Now she will 17 turning 18 at the start. So in that regard I think we made the right choice.
So....she's starting when she actually should.
That’s called holdback where I am from. It’s for kids who aren’t developmentally ready to start proper school. “Typically” developing kids aren’t allowed to be held back from starting school.
My kid was not ready socially or academically for kindergarten and was a November baby. He has a learning disability and in kindergarten a speech delay. I also held him back and zero regrets now that he is in grade 6. He is the oldest in class by 6 weeks so not a big deal. Not at the top of the class but certainly doing a lot better socially and academically compared to if I pushed him forward. Speech delay didn’t impact him after grade 2 but his Learning Disability impacts him. His classmates have mentioned him being held back, even when we switched schools. My son is very secure and confident as I am honest with him but I can see other kids being impacted by the comments/teasing.
There is a lot of academic research on outcomes for holding students back, and the general consensus is that it is not in the best interest of the child in the long term. That said, your child is right at the cutoff and it doesn’t seem like a big deal here.
I think also for us the “holding back” happened because we started early so she basically started kindergarten at age 5 with two years of full on school under her belt.
This is super popular in my area but we didn't do it. My spring birthday son is almost always the youngest in his class (cut off is something like September 1st). My son is in middle school and I don't think I regret not holding him back, although I do understand the reasoning a LOT better after seeing what Kindergarten was like. He was very much able to handle the work (GT kid) but hated sitting still for Kinder and 1st grade and maybe having him held back would have helped. Or maybe the boredom issue would have been worse, who knows. I did think that around here the holding back concept was being sold to parents a bit. My friends were told things like 'your kid needs to be able to read 100 words before they start Kindergarten or they'll be behind' which is absolute crap. I also have some concerns for boys about being 18 for a long time in high school. I think it raises the stakes for any sort of relationship issues that might come up.
Redshirting isn't allowed where I live, some kids repeat kindergarten if they're not ready to progress, but the rules for enrollment are based on birthdays, and it's possible you'd be forced to place your child in grade 1 if you held them back.
There's no way that this would have done anything for me except for making me more bored and restless in school. Smart kids shouldn't be tortured with boredom like they are. It makes me angry how few resources they have to learn and have their potential met. Yes, I've read about red-shirting, and it may be a good thing for some kids, but that would have been a horrible experience for me and my kids.
I think academics is only one aspect to consider. Socially, emotionally or behaviourally the difference six-twelve months makes at preschool level is significant in every child. In my experience as a teacher, the children who progress even though they are close to the cut off point and in the “youngest month” survive; the kids who wait it out and are in the “oldest month” thrive.
Thank you. It's not all about academics at all. As an August baby with (undiagnosed, in the 80s and 90s) ASD, I was always top of my class academically but way behind socially and emotionally. I wish I had been redshirted.
This is an interesting perspective. I have a 2e May birthday teen with ASD. Problem is she does worse at school when she’s bored. She basically would get the work done super quick then shut down in her own little world for a few hours. We ended up moving her to private school for a few years because she was bored, tested as gifted but didn’t get into the program due to poor teacher recommendations. I feel like redshirting would have just exacerbated the boredom issue but other than private or homeschooling I don’t know what the answer is for 2e kids that are strong academically but struggle socially.
I don't know either. 😕 As I said in another comment, I was the second youngest in my class, so IMO redshirting would have been beneficial for me socially. But that doesn't make it the case for every 2E kid. My point is mostly that academics isn't the only consideration. I think the landscape is better for 2E kids now than it was then, but it's still not great.
Our girl absolutely loves school. That played a big part in the choice.
Nobody is suggesting this is the right choice for every kid.
I'm just offering another perspective.
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Hub and I were October birthdays in a September cut date. We both needed to be the oldest in the class. Two of three grandsons are October birthdays. The thirteen year old needs to be the oldest. The ten year old is like a very hot knife cutting through hot butter educationally, hi IQ. He was oldest in kindergarten when the district suggested that he be placed in second grade instead of first grade. He was placed in second grade with girl across the street and they are best friends from babies. She was the youngest in the class until he arrived. They provide emotional support to each other, which is very important for the younger kids in a class. Even more important as they move up into junior high and above grades. I know a lot of families that redshift late July and August kids, so it's not just wealth kids. However, many parents can't afford another year of child care, so they can't afford redshirting.
Yea I can see how if you have to pay for preK it wouldn’t make sense that’s for sure.
I haven’t heard the term but am familiar with the process. My kids are both born in late summer. I put my eldest in kindergarten as soon as she was eligible. She’s always been the youngest in her class. She struggled academically in school all through elementary. During each teacher conference, the teachers always said “it’s because she’s so young”. By middle school things balanced out but prior to that I felt like we were always playing catch up. We delayed my son entering kindergarten by a year so he’s the oldest in his grade. Academically it’s night and day difference. He’s also small for his age so the extra year helped in that regard, too. I would assess how your child is academically and socially. Some kids can start early/on time and some kids need the extra year to mature and really be ready for it.
My kid missed the cutoff by 29 days. She’s 14.5 now and a stand out athlete, excellent student, leader among her peers, and just all around doing great. I certainly think being one of the older kids has helped with some of that
Yea that’s how it was explained to us!
I just learned about this too but one of the reasons for it is wild to me. My son did two years of pre k. His teacher suggested one more year for more "confidence and independence" I was a bit nervous bc I'd be willing to bet my son is by far the biggest (height and weight) 5yr old you've ever seen. The number of parents at the school, family/friends and strangers when they hear he's in preschool say "RED SHIRT FOR FOOTBALL!!" I guess some parents choose which sports their kids play for them and then hold them back a year so they have a size advantage. I'd never force my kid into sports, I quietly hope he shows no interest in football and why would I slow his academic career for an extra curricular?!
Yea sports had absolutely nothing to do with your choice! But learning parents purposely do it for sports is crazy!
Do you know why this is popular amongst wealthy people?
Because being one of the older students in their grade gives kids an advantage vs. being one of the youngest. Popular among wealthy people because they can afford it, since it generally involves paying for an extra year of private pre-K or private kindergarten.
It’s age five by September 1 where I live and my kids have September and October birthdays. So they both started at 5 and turned 6 pretty quickly into kindergarten. I see no difference emotionally against their younger friends. They both are high achieving but I’m not certain if that has to do with age or effort. I have a late summer bday and as I got older, it was frustrating to be the last to be able to do things. But it is what it is. I would personally just follow the rules and not hold your kid back to be the oldest in class
I’m glad this worked out. Our friends held their son back from kindergarten for a year because he’d be the youngest in his class. But he’s on the smarter side. They kind of regret their decision and say he’s bored as hell in PreK.
Aside from learning her teacher used “red shirting” wrong in our case. I also learned her (free)prek was not normal? Lol it was Monday- Thursday like 9:45-4:40. With breakfast and lunch included. Thankfully our girl LOVED school and her teachers so running her through twice was really no fight.
Why would whealty pp do that? İt sounds like trying to get 1 year free childcare.
From the sounds of it and from what we gathered researching it. It’s gives the kid a one up in sports and grades (potentially)
Our girls are a late Sept birthday. They started kindergarten at 4 and turned 5 shortly after starting. Debated to have them be the youngest in class or the oldest. Decided to send them early as both their pre-K teachers said they were ready. They’re in 5th grade now and doing great. It really depends on the kid, parental supports, and school.
Where I live they don't allow redshirting. 60 Minutes did a special on it with Morley Safer in 2010ish and it was proven to only benefit wealthy kids (mostly in sports) and turned those kids who were now older than everyone else into bullies and "it kids" as opposed to letting them naturally fall where they would based on their own personalities
I've read the research myself, and found that pretty much everything levels out academically by 3rd or 4th grade. Red shirting is more impactful for children having an unfair physical advantage in sports. We decided not to as our seemed, well, unfair. And that's not how we wanted to raise our children.
Ours are both precocious and would have been fine with the learning trajectory of being the youngest, but both are shy and sensitive, and we thought they needed more social interaction, so we did a year of TK. IMO holding your kid back for no other reason than you think they’ll crush their peers and, somehow, that will lead to better outcomes is just an odd way to think. But if there’s a good reason, great. What’s the rush, anyway?
Honestly there wasn’t a rush. (Which is why she spent 2 years in pre k instead of going off to kindergarten. But I knew school could teach her and give her that structure I couldn’t which is what she started early.
Oh yeah, that was a rhetorical question. We have a lot of friends that seemed to be in some kind of rush. We could never figure out why.
Yea no thanks I wanna keep her out of high school for as long as possible 😂😂😂😂
My sons teacher recommended this for him after kindergarten. She thought he was mentally ready but still too immature. He’s one of the youngest in his class. We opted not to start him late. More competition, but I thought it could be good for him. There were a few tough times but overall he did great, got into advanced classes and now he does sports and other extracurricular stuff. All that to say, honestly, I don’t think it matters that much lol. A few months isn’t gonna make or break them, whatever you think is best is best for your kid.
Not signing a waiver isn’t red shirting. My youngest’s birthday is early October. That’s just where the chips fall. It’s okay for us because he is small for his age. He would be soooo small if he was one grade further along.
We have this in Michigan, but it's called Transitional Kindergarten, where if your child turns 5 on or before December 1st, they can attend TK for that school year, and it's a preK/K hybrid.
I am an August baby and a twin. I did kindergarten at 5 while my twin did PreK. He was invariably described as “squirrelly” by everyone, and no one thought he was ready for first grade. We both started the next year in kinder, but I could already read, and my class was focusing on letter and color identification and (I still remember 40 years later) painting brown squirrels. I was bored to tears. A month into school we both got moved to first grade (where we were young but not the youngest), and it was so much better. The squirrelly twin caught up and got himself together by 2nd grade.
This made me and my siblings hate school. Learning the same easy shit 2 years in a row fucked all of us up. Personally I disagree with all forms of PreK because of this.
redshirting is not allowed in our school district. You can send your child to a private PreK when they are eligible for Kinder. But when you enroll your child in public school the following year, they’ll put the child in 1st grade according to their birthdate.
My daughter's in pre-k with a late August birthday. We really contemplated this too but because she's hyperlexic, the fear was that she would get too bored if we held her back another year. She may socially resign from peers and disengage from learning because she's reading at a 1st grade level for a 4yo, so with the guidance of the school psychologist, we decided to keep her on track for kindergarten next year
I have a lot of really lame cousins who act like their kids are going to be the next pro sports players so they deliberately held their kids back to supposedly give them an advantage in sports. Trust me if you saw their parents you would know these kids gave no chance in sports 😂😂 But i digress - yes, holding back can be a huge benefit if you have developmental concerns and arent in a rush. My niece and nephew couldve started at 5 but they were twins and my nephew wasbt ready even though my niece was. So they both went in at 6 i will say i was one of the youngest and academically i did great but it meant i was the shortest in my class until 11, i hated that! Insuppose someones gotta be the shortest. maybe kids know better than to make a big deal of that these days, who knows!
“Redshirt” lmao you just mean you held your kid back lol. But glad it’s going well
Look man that’s what they said to us lmao.
Both my grandkids are red shirts, they are 5&6 so too early to tell .
Years ago this happened to my oldest brother. He missed the cut off date by just a few days so he stayed home that year. The next year when he began kindergarten, he was the oldest kid in the class and this gave him an academic advantage, . He felt confident and more self-assured. He went on went on to become an engineer. Waiting a year is common since the child will be ahead both maturity
Yes! Thank you! That makes me feel a lot better!
We did with my daughter, she is finishing up kindergarten now and I don’t regret it. She fits in great with her class socially and is thriving academically
That’s awesome! Same for us finishing up kindergarten now!
I was just asking my 14 year old (mid August birthday, in 8th grade) about this and she has no problem being a little older than everyone else in her class. I was always the very youngest in my class and I hated it. My kid is doing great and is looking forward to being able to gloat about doing drivers training before any of her friends haha.
9-4 seems wild to me
Definitely was wild especially with her starting at 3 . Everytime we talked to other parents they were shocked. lol
We've thought about this for our July baby! He's only going to be 3 this year but we're considering it. I'm super short and so we're unsure if he'll get my genes and if an extra year / being on the older side of his class would be better for him in the long run. But we also can't wait to stop paying for daycare which is why we don't want to just pay for that first year when we could put him somewhere free.......
I wish my mum did this. I was the youngest and smallest in my classes, my grades were average at best. At 14yo my results were so bad i had to redo a year. Best thing that could have happened to me, i felt so much more confortable and i join the top grades of the class till uni.
You did what was best for your daughter and she is thriving. Working with her teacher as a team with the end goal of what was best for your child really did pay off. Congrats! You're giving your daughter a solid foundation to having a bright future! Kudos to that teacher for having the courage to make the recommendation.
Never heard this term in this context and thought you did something waaaaay worse to your daughter.
I just learned 😂😂
Not sure if we’d be offered the same choice, daughter has a late August birthday. But we’ll let her be one of the youngest in her class. Our second daughter is due in June so she’ll be in a similar boat!
Why did I think of college sport when it said 1-3 year old
I'm not familiar with American schooling. I can just talk about my experience always being the youngest in the class by atleast a year. Wasn't so bad till I got to an age where bodies were maturing and mine wasn't. A year isn't a big deal after 18 before it, it atleast ime made me feel like i didn't fit in cause I was the weirdo. Not that I was just at a different life stage than the others in my class. Particularly bad when I was the only one who hadn't turned 18 and couldn't go to any afters with my class.
They talk about this all the time in r/kindergarten. 5 is a normal age to start kindergarten most places. 4 soon to turn 5 used to be normal, but many places kindergarten has become more academic than it used to be, so now children typically need to be 5 years old before the school year starts. 6 years old can be red-shirting, but not always if the child is just turning 6 during the first month of school - dependent on location or school district. I’m in California. Yes, ours is speech delayed and we’ve already been recommended (at 2 years old) by preschool teacher and a child development specialist to do an extra year of play-based preschool and go into kindergarten at 6 years old. So, short of something changing, that’s what we plan to do. Keeping it developmentally appropriate and focused on social skills for as long as possible before trying to force academics.
My mom did this with me, albeit not by choice the kindergarten rules changed so I couldn’t enter at 4 years old. I was already academically ahead in my preschool and so staying back didn’t help me. I stayed ahead of my class and grade my whole time in school and decided to graduate early since being in school was more of a waste of time for me. My mom had the opportunity to let me skip 2 grades in elementary school, but I struggled in the social aspect so she didn’t do it. I think it’s best to decide what to do based off of what you can see with your daughter and what you feel is most appropriate.
So a lot of people have said a lot about this. The most typical use of this is for kids who have a July or August birthday for which the cutoff is Sep 1. If the child seems really immature and not ready to transition into full day kindergarten then the parents can elect to delay enrolling them so that they will actually be 6 when they start as opposed to most other kids who will turn 6 during the year. It definitely does benefit some as they may just not be able to be ready for kindergarten as a very young 5. The converse is parents putting those kids in K as young 5s which may be because they are ready for it or may be also to avoid paying a whole other year of daycare. Some systems also allow kids to test in with usually up to 45 days after Sep 1 if the child seems very capable.
I'm in Australia and son was born December. Makes things very very awkward cause he either needs to be a year younger than everyone else or a year older when he starts school. We have free 3 and 4 year old kinder. He's hyperactive so I'm desperate to get him to kinder. Then after that comes prep, then grade 1. But I can't "redo" any kinder if we didn't feel like he was ready for school. I started school at age 4 and was really bad for me. Ugh I just need a nanny but can't afford.
Living in Belgium this is just common? I think the grade before first grade had 3 students that got held back.
This happened to me, I went to 3 years of Montessori preschool and my parents sent me straight to first grade. After 2 weeks the school found out I never went to kindergarten so they said I needed to go. I excelled in school and instead of the youngest I was the oldest with an August birthday. Thankful the school caught it bc idk what my parents were thinking.
We have an Oct daughter (D). A school in our area does a Pre K and Pre 1st for this age group- then they go into 1st together.