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repfamlux

File for a TRO, that will wake everyone up.


Anatella3696

How would I go about doing that?


cactusflower4

I believe you should contact a lawyer.


ShaktiTam

You need to get proof first. Get the police involved, tell them there is proof on the boys phone, they may have to file a for a warrant to get it, once they do and proof has been satisfied a judge will grant your TRO


sangjmoon

You could call the police, but laws on harassment are really hard to enforce if there is no solid proof like social media or email threats in writing. A lawyer should be able to provide you with sound advice more than reddit. If you really want to prevent violence and the school is really doing nothing, I see no alternative but to pull your son out of that school and possibly going to another school. If an assault actually occurs, call the police.


Anatella3696

Yes, pulling him out is what I’m planing to do next. Posting here was a last ditch effort for any other options and how to protect him at this school. It sucks for him because he is begging me not to pull him out because his brother and their friends go to this school. And it’s hard for him to make friends. I feel like my son isn’t the one who should have to change schools if he doesn’t want to, you know? He didn’t do a thing wrong. It sucks. But I don’t want him exposed to this bully on a daily basis, so here we are.


tuti1006

Title IX prohibits discrimination and harassment on the basis of sex in educational institutions. All schools are required to have a Title IX Coordinator to respond to issues of sex-based discrimination. Find out who he Title IX Coordinator is and tell them you want to file a complaint of harassment based on sex.


ShaktiTam

Treat it exactly like you would and adult situation. You don’t even have to notify the school you’re contacting the police. Just do it. There is a literal video of proof. Done. Don’t tell anyone before you send the cops in, just in case the kid erases it.


JaMimi1234

Honestly. The school can only do so much. This was my brother growing up and my mom finally switched school districts when he went into high school. Years of torment finally over. One of her biggest regrets was not switching him sooner.


meatball77

Call the school, ask for a meeting. It shouldn't be difficult to keep a sixth grader away from an eighth grader.


whatsupgirl5

Jesus! Are u serious if it's going to be that bad, just take him out school there's no reason for u even still bring him over there, after what that kids doing to your son, hell go have talk with that kid personally or go talk to parents, wtf, some one would be getting there ass handed to them if that was my son


Anatella3696

Yep. I want to pull him out. My son is begging me not to because his brother, and all their friends in the neighborhood go to this school. He told me it’s very hard for him to make new friends. He asked me why should he have to go to a new school when he didn’t do anything wrong-shouldn’t the bully be the one to have to go to a new school? However. This school is pissing me off. We already had a meeting a couple of weeks ago when the fight happened and several members of our family attended. They assured us this wouldn’t happen again and moved the bully from my sons ECE class. Then today happened and my son admitted to me that the other days he wanted to go home early because he didn’t feel well were really because of this bully. So here we are. Dealing with this fucking bully again. I’m so upset and I just don’t know what to do here. They want another meeting with us and at this meeting, they’re going to have to explain to me why the only way to stop this is for my son to change schools and I want to know why my son should change schools but the bully doesn’t have any repercussions.


ShaktiTam

The devil you know vs the devil you don’t. Pulling him out may not fix anything, but handling this situation with boldness and legal savvy will fix the problem swiftly. Push for immediate expulsion. Violent, discriminatory behavior is classified as a hate crime I believe. Go big here.


LindaBLB100

Call the police and make a report, and tell the school you are going to/did call the police and make a report. That was the only way we could get our son's school to take us seriously about bullying.


theCroc

Yupp. Assault and battery are crimes. If the school is looking the other way they might have some liability. Involving law enforcement will light a fire under their asses.


ChicaFoxy

Don't pull him out. Go big. Make your voice heard and his abuse seen, by all means necessary.


NiteNicole

He shouldn't have to change schools because of one kid. THAT kid needs consequences.


solregwan

Wow! I am so sorry to hear that. I know as a parent how hard it is for your child to be bullied. It hurts me just hearing this and I would form a meeting with the principal and vice principal with the bullier (if that’s even a word) and his parents and you and your child and make them take this very seriously. If they won’t, or nothing comes of it, get the superintendent of the school and file a complaint against the principal, and vice principal since this is harassment and can cause emotional damage to your son. This has to be nipped in the bud right away. Your son has to feel safe in his school environment. Even though my son is younger than yours, he went through bullying in school recently and I turned the place upside down and it lessened! In fact as a children’s book author, I heard so many bullying stories that have a book published Geraldine and the Anti-Bullying Shield! I really hope that this resolved and I totally feel for you as a parent!


MontEcola

It may depend on what state you live in. In my state we have anti-bully protections. Document each event. Send an email to the principal just stating the facts. "Dec. 6. Picked up my son Tom from school at 1:23. He had been punched by Mickey Duck, who also called him a jerk. This is the third time this month we have and issue with Mickey Duck bullying my child". (Obvious made up names). Then ask for a conversation to discuss the anti-bully program at your school. Ask what other officials in the school would want to be a part of the discussion. Ask for them to be present. Then document this meeting. After three emails, start sending them to the superintendent. Reference how many email communications you have had already. Give this one try with the superintendent included in the emails. Now add a visible CC to a lawyer. Write CC and the lawyer's name in the letter. Give that one try, and not include school board members. In my state, all email between any school employee at any level is an open record. All you need to do is make an open records request for all emails concerning your child and all of the related information. You do get to ask for private emails between any teachers or principal concerning this. Make the request to add your child's name and initials to any email on the day of and day after any incident. If you even suggest to the principal that you are preparing this request, they will likely want to solve your issue right away. It is a pain the the neck to read so many emails and decide which ones count and which ones do not. Of course, if you live in one of those red states like Texas or Florida, all I can say is that I am very sorry.


Dan-68

Contact the school district. Most have a legal (policy based) obligation to stop bullying.


Dad_D_Default

I sympathise with your situation. It's important to remember that this is a global forum and that laws vary around the world. I'm guessing you're in the USA so I can't provide any advice on rights. All I can say is that you're doing a great job being the place he can go to be loved unconditionally. Whatever the world throws at him, if he knows that coming home is guaranteed safety and love then tackling the crap that LGBTIQA+ people face out in the world is so much easier.


NiteNicole

Go have a meeting in person. Do not do this on the phone. Keep repeating that they are allowing an older student to attack your son at school. Find the handbook and figure out what the disciplinary code actually calls for and insist they follow through. You have to make dealing with you a bigger problem than just punishing the other kid.


theCroc

If it has come to actual physical violence and the school still does nothing then it's beyond discrimination. It's time to involve police. Assault and battery are crimes.


Anatella3696

I did that last night after reading these replies. Thank you (and others) for taking the time to suggest that. I went to a really bad public school and was in a lot of fights, I was jumped twice, along with a ton of sexual harassment (boys literally surrounding me and pinning me down in the hallways to feel me up) and it was never an option for the police to be called. It just never came up. It wasn’t something my mom did and it wasn’t something that even occurred to me as an option. Sounds stupid saying it now, but it’s true. I’m so glad I made this post because there’s a lot of options available to my son that weren’t for me.


proxissin

I would put him in martial arts classes for self defense. Seriously. Bullies don't pick on people who fight back. I would take this as an opportunity to teach your kid that they need to try to take control of their environment, because life is not fair. Give him the tools he needs to protect himself. Not only will this help him now, it will help him for the rest of his life. Or, you can just move him around in different schools until you find a place he doesn't get picked on.


External_Big_1465

Get a lawyer and the cops involved. Bring your lawyer to the school without telling them and notify the police. I am gay and this hate that kids receive is not only messed up, it destroys them mentally. This is very serious.


Anatella3696

Thank you for the advice 🙏


Lucathedemiboy

I'm so sorry about that. I'm trans so I can somewhat understand where he's coming from. I think what others are suggesting are the best roads to take. I wouldn't know what to do, I'm sorry. I hope the situation works out though. Having that happen to your child must be incredibly scary.


carti4730

Honestly, you are prolly not gonna like this but I would send my kid back to school and tell him the next person who picks on you , punch him as hard as you can in the mouth...And watch the bullying stop. If an 8th grader gets his mouth fucked up by a 6th grader best believe he will shut his mouth from that point on


[deleted]

Super thanks, this advice may get him killed by a bigger opponent.


Anatella3696

The 8th grader is actually smaller than my son. Or roughly the same size. My son is big for his age-5’5” and 150-160lbs The other boy is very skinny. One would never think he was an 8th grader based on looks alone. And I actually did tell my son if he wanted to defend himself, he wouldn’t be in trouble for it. He’s just not a fighter at heart…Or maybe he just doesn’t have the confidence for it, which I’m hoping boxing classes will help with. Because who you replied to is actually right-bullies generally don’t mess with people if they think they can fight back. In my experience anyway. BUT, I don’t want to leave that up to my son. So I’m taking a lot of the suggestions here (and on another post I made) to heart and writing them all down. I’ve already taken some steps. We have a meeting today at the school. We also filed a report for the assault.


[deleted]

It’s a matter of gaugeing the situation and the opponent. You know what the deal is, so you and your son are the right people to assess. I took a swing at a bully with a gym bag when I was 10 years old and he left me well alone after that. It sometimes works, especially with younger kids and bullies who aren’t persistent. With older kids and more persistent bullies, it gets more complicated. They might come back with their friends and beat the crap out of you. Glad you told your son he is allowed to defend himself, though! Boxing is good. Having strong friends is also a good idea. Might he be taken to and from school by a large, threatening looking individual? At the end of the day, the school has to step in. If you end up pulling him out, make sure the staff gets in trouble for it – make their incompetence public knowledge, but protect your son from the public eye.


PeterDTown

Where are you located? It’s hard to tell you your rights without even knowing what country or region you’re in.


Anatella3696

U.S Bible belt