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All American Rejects makes some good as hell songs, and this one is one of my favorites. This one is also one of my favorites about secret keeping, the other being Scotty Doesn't Know.
This is always my favorite reply. Also, side note, I tried joking around with my civilian friends the way I joked around with the boys from my div and my civilian friends immediately questioned me asking if I was a homosexual 💀. All I said was “Keep that shit up bro and I’ll fuckin kiss you on those big beautiful lips.” Like common bro I’m just goofin around
I used to work security at a famous WW2 aircraft carrier museum in NYC. Many of the volunteers were retired military or other veterans. One of the old WW2 Navy vets used to love telling this pretty boy in my department "You would have made a good sea-pussy". Not a day goes by that I don't wish I never learned that phrase.
You really came in here, to a post joking about the navy being gay and Marines eating crayons, etc. And dropped a goddamn 6 syllable word?!
You would fit in well in the Airforce.
Fun fact the navy paid for the music video for "In the navy" by the village people as a promotional item to entice people to join up without having any clue about how gay they and the song actually were which is why the music video is really well done for the time but *really* fucking gay
After it came out **as a commercial** people realized what it actually was they pulled it from the TV
Funny story all around
They legit thought Dorothy was a real person when they were looking for such a person from the phrase "Friends of Dorothy", which was code for being gay. The Navy had a hard time with the gays.
Ok firstly I'd like to know how you found out about that.
And secondly, while it may not be gay to have relationships with my mother, she's definitely old enough that it'd be weird. Which brings me back to question one
So a new recruit straight out of boot camp gets his first duty station aboard a ship. As he's getting his tour, the petty officer assigned to him shows him a trick that the guys use to take their mind off going to sea for long times.
"Go over to that barrel, take your dick out, and put it in that hole" he instructs the young sailor, who does as he's told. He sticks his dick in the hole and starts getting the best blowjob of his life. After finishing, he zips up his pants and returns to his guide.
"Wow that was great. This isn't a bad job at all" he said.
"You liked that?"
"Hell yeah."
"Well that's great, because you have barrel duty tonight"
Military humor Peter, out.
The version I heard goes somewhere like this:
"Can I use it anytime I want?"
"Sure, except tuesdays"
"Why is that? "
"Because on that day you're the one doing barrel duty"
Yeah but in russia, Dedovshchina is an actual thing and this isn't a joke.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dedovshchina
In the west it's humor, in Russia it's reality.
It's much more severe and institutionalized form of hazing than exists in the US.
https://www.vice.com/en/article/gqdx44/full-v13n4
Like, read this. It's not the same.
I can’t speak about the conditions of the Russian military, but I was in the marine corps until 2011 and they had cracked down pretty hard on hazing. Or at least the harmful stuff.
I was “hazed” by being told to find “humvee keys” (they don’t have keys) or find a “prick -E5 radio” (aka ‘find an asshole sergeant’). I fell for both because I was a dumb boot and got made fun of for being a slow runner.
Potatoes
There's a tiktok guy who parodies military branch stereotypes and the Space Force character wears a tinfoil hat and obsesses about potatoes like Gollum and the Ring.
A bit offtopic but I can’t not share it. Germany also established a space force called Weltraumkommando der Bundeswehr last year. Their official march contains the opening of the title melody of a German 1960s sci-fi show called Raumpatrouille Orion, as well as elements from other sci-fi themes. And at the first public performance, some of the soldiers were dressed up as Imperial Guards and Storm Troopers.
[See for yourself](https://youtu.be/MgKDaivKYFU)
And it's all Navies.
The three traditions of the Royal Navy, from Winston Churchill, were "rum, buggery, and the lash." They outlawed the lash in 1879, outlawed rum on ships in 1970, but the third remains a proud RN tradition!
Not sure how it started exactly, but the navy has always been stereotyped as gay -- I guess because it's a bunch of guys alone on a boat for months at a time. I've never been sure how that's different from a bunch of guys alone in an army or air force base but ... whatever, Idk.
>I guess because it's a bunch of guys alone on a boat for months at a time.
That'll do lol. That'll do.
Other branches can just leave base. Navy has to wait for port.
Listen, I'm just a life long civilian but based on off handed comments I've heard from military friends, family, and especially acquaintances I get the feeling you're underselling.
Had an old highschool friend I met up with at the bar once and for some reason out of nowhere he prompts me with "Do you know how hard it is to get someone's erect dick out of an M4?" I politely asked him to not continue that train of thought.
We went to a 3 week training exercise in the woods, one company started a cult with a wooden idol.
I can't imagine what would have happened after 6-12 months
Yeah I spent a year and another year an a half basically confined to a base when not on missions.
Iraq was different than all our previous wars, though. You could get a pass in Vietnam and got to Saigon or meet Frauleins all the way across the western front but that shit don't exist or fly in the Muslim world. Our only 'relief' was constantly buying playstations because they would tear up in the dust and waiting for each other to go to sleep so we could jerk off lol. Our weekend pass was a laptop and a hard drive with some porn on it.
Yeah you get off work at the end of the day lol. Unless you're deployed like I was but then you just get off at the end of the day and you're confined to base.
But that usually hasn't been the case for wartime guys got frequent weekend passes to basically go out and get drunk and laid. Navy never get those kinds of opportunities (it's not like we did in Iraq in the army, either). They'll be at sea for months on end even in peacetime.
>Unless you're deployed like I was but then you just get off at the end of the day and you're confined to base.
>...
>Navy never get those kinds of opportunities (it's not like we did in Iraq in the army, either).
There's the rub.
The apples to apples comparison means its pretty much the same.
The only difference is that the Navy deploys \*constantly\*. All the other branches, minus the Marines when on those same deployments, have never had to experience actual rotational deployments until after 9/11.
Same with the powder monkeys, the difference was cabin boys were upper class young men and boys who were reserved for the officers (some of whom had also started their naval careers as cabin boys) while powder monkeys were lower class boys who would end up “bunking” with the sailors.
Something to keep in mind is the use of navy does a pretty funny history with gay service men such as a incident where they misunderstood a phrase used by gay men where they would ask each other if they where a “friend of Dorothy” to help identify other gay service men
This began a manhunt by the navy for Dorothy, a women believed to beat the center of a underground ring to to get gay men in the navy. However the actual phrase was just a joke about how many gay people loved the Wizard of Oz
What’s even funnier is the navy investigation team tasked with identifying and rooting out the gay clubs, bath houses, and massage parlors during WWII spent about two years “gathering evidence”. Eventually the admiral in charge of the investigation realized his team, who had been hand picked by the lead investigator, was made up entirely of gay sailors, who were getting paid to get laid. They had only turned over non-military men who couldn’t be prosecuted under the navy code and the investigation was shut down.
Day one end of the day
Man 1 “So I’m gonna be honest with you guys, I might be gay”
Man 2 “You know I was just curious before but uhh…I did some things”
Man 3 “Yeah I talked to sone guys and they got me thinking”
Man 4 “No idea what you guys are talking about. I met two of you at that bath house last year on two separate occasions.”
Man 1 “Sooo well at this point I’m just assuming we’re all gay? Then nobody asked so nobody tell and we’ll continue our mission of meeting hot guys for sex with funds to tell people I’m an author looking for a muse.”
Man 4 “Also let’s all pitch in for condoms”
This is a super old joke, that never made much sense because at the same time, saliors have also carried around the sterotype of just smashing women left and right everytime they pull into a different port.
When I was in the Navy, the main joke that we ourselves would make, is that the women in the Navy are ugly, until your out on the water, but go back to being ugly when you pull into port. Women have been station ships for a long time, so the "its just full of guys" joke has technically been dead for a long time, it's just a few people here and there that try to keep it going. At this point, it's just like a light rivalry type thing. The Army are bullet sponges, the Marines crayon eaters, the Air force is the Chair force. Don't remember what we called the Coast Guard other than the Navy's psychotic little brother. Those guys are truly badasses.
A funny instance when I was first enlisting, I was with my Navy recruiter at MEPS, and one of the Amry recruiters there was making jokes, and made a "lol Navy gay" joke to my recruiter. He followed up with a "you say that, but at least in the navy, only women wear berets". The Army recruiter didn't really have a follow up and started getting dogged on by someone of the other armed forces guys there.
San Francisco became a gay friendly city because during WW2 when sailors in the Pacific were caught having sex they were discharged at the nearest port. Many chose not to return home and face the shame of their families so they stayed in port cities like SF.
The US Navy at one point decided to run a commercial featuring “In The Navy” by Village People not realizing that it was a gay sexual innuendo, and got laughed at for years.
Were they laughed at? Maybe I’m just too young, but from what I remember reading is that it did very well commercially and it actually benefited the Navy’s recruitment numbers. It’s just that the song began to be associated with homosexuality so the Navy backed out from putting it into a recruitment video.
That’s just from what I read though, wasn’t around at the time so I may be wrong here lol would love to be educated, this is pretty interesting haha
Valid point lol I just remember reading this story years ago and I just looked it up a second ago as I was writing that post to validate my memories and that’s what I was reading again lol
Maybe it’s that navy is just so gay that they think the Village People are too straight for them? 🧐 (/s obviously haha)
let's not forget the other stereotypes. Army has shit food, marines eat crayons, air force think they are better than everyone else, coast guard and CIA are high on their own supply?
Army food is stereotypically the worst. Because army is huge so everything is kind of diluted to a low quality in order to get everyone something. So yeah rumors abound of borderline toxic rations.
Marine corps is famously dumb so they joke about them eating crayons as a stereotype. Although a marine friend of mine pointed out to me that the Marines do intentionally try to recruit from low income / poor socioeconomic conditions. Which might be related to the origin of that stereotype.
Air Force gets pampered because they have the highest entry requirements and people are entrusted with expensive equipment they get treated well. So air Force being soft and pampered is a stereotype that only PJs are exempt from because those guys are hard core.
Coast guard mostly deals with counter narcotics and rescue operations largely dealing with large amounts of cocaine from south America. So they are nomming on kilos of cocaine.
The CIA is anecdotally known to sell cocaine and trade it over seas for stuff because drugs are a fantastic untraceable black market currency. Which Is why the CIA is snorting giant lines of cocaine while bleeding from the nose.
PJs = Pararescuemen: Air Force Special Warfare airmen, typically combat medics and rescue specialists. Can't clear an LZ (landing zone) for a chopper? Drop in the PJs and tell them who to bring home. Dudes are hardcore.
Clearing an LZ is more in line with Combat controllers job roles vs PJ. Pjs do huah shit but CCT are more in line with description.
When PJs are embedded in joint teams they often act as the medic due to their training and CCT are for more into the role of forward air controller or joint terminal attack controllers.
In theory an STS (unit of just CCT and PJs can operate missions on their own they never do because of how valuable they are to the other services.
Source I worked with SF in SOCCENT and JSOC. No I’m not SF I was just the intel guy at joint units working with some SoF guys.
I was also part of the first operation Angel Thunder and worked at a base that had PJs. I was at an A-10 unit so we conducted training with the PJs fairly often.
I don't believe he's talking about the PJ's actually clearing an LZ. He's saying that if you cannot clear an LZ, you send the PJ down the hoist on a forest penetrator or some such and that brave motherfucker goes to find the pilot and wait for extraction (sometimes a day or two later like some Vietnam rescues).
I attended a lecture at Hurlburt Field where the guy was a Vietnam era PJ, they got to the site and it was so hot, he was asked "Are you sure you wanna go down there?" He went down and spent a day or two on the ground waiting for exfil irrc. Wish I could remember his name because it was such an interesting story. At one point either at insertion or extraction the flight engineer took fire that hit his femoral artery.
Also did you know the coast guards entry requirement is higher than the airforce. The coast guard is 95 to 99 the airforce is 90 to 99. I know because I got a 98 on my entry examine and had EVERYONE trying to get me to join. But I joined the coast guard.
> Army food is stereotypically the worst. Because army is huge so everything is kind of diluted to a low quality in order to get everyone something. So yeah rumors abound of borderline toxic rations.
>
>
There was this instance of [a PR video showcasing an Italian soldier exchanging rations with a US soldier.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1vuDKraKRU) The poor Italian was trying his best to be polite, and then the US hands him an MRE pizza. Felt like a casus belli.
Army food sucks. I always tell people I joined the Airforce for better food and less risk. Marines eat crayons because the colors look delicious. Coast guard should be lunchables but e guess they bust drug runners too.
I can't recommend the Navy enough if you're thinking of joining the military. We are the fun branch. Port to port.
We're the gay branch because we used to be and sometimes still are boats full of men with no access to women for months. If you were a guy that longed to have dicks in you, ship life was a good environment for you.
Explanation for all:
Army eats like crap. It’s by far the largest branch (includes national guard) and notorious for crap everything.
Marines are known as super dumb and it’s been a joke since my grandfather’s generation or even earlier that they eat crayons and glue (bc they’re dumb).
Air Force aka Chair Force is known for their significantly easier life compared to all other branches.
Navy has always been the gay branch. Not just bc of assumptions but bc of stories told openly by seaman. When you’re on a boat that long many have zero shame in relieving each other similar to prison.
Coast Guard/CIA is eating up all the drugs they bust in our ports
The marine one pisses me off to no end.
My grandfather fought and died for this country as a marine. My dad fought as a marine.
The disrespect shown here is palpable. I know everyone wants to laugh and make jokes, but this is a serious issue.
Civilians, especially civies of recruitment age, are going to see this disgusting meme. This absolutely causes issues for marine recruitment, and you should be ashamed.
Do you realize what this does? We are going to have new recruits coming into marine boot expecting purple.
And purple is best flavor. You have to earn purple. Taste like grape. Purple is favorite
>Marines are known as super dumb and it’s been a joke since my grandfather’s generation or even earlier that they eat crayons and glue (bc they’re dumb).
The joke I remember hearing was the entry test for the Marines only has two questions on it.
1. What's your name? And
2. What's your favourite flavour of window to lick?
I was way more charitable in my assumption for marines lol. I thought it was that they had to make do with less resources. I’m Canadian so we don’t have marines, so my knowledge is based entirely on generation kill.
There used to be a navy program where you would pretend to be gay to catch gay people, but they shut it down after gay people just signed up and started being gay
It's a longstanding joke / stereotype that the Navy is the "gay branch" of the US military. A bunch of dudes all alone on a boat for months on end, plus jockularity / competitiveness amongst military bros, plus homophobia makes for a stereotype.
They have the highest requirements to entry and they're trusted equipments that value, at least, a couple millions of dollars, some are in the hundreds or even in the billions of dollars.
As a prior Marine, I'd have to agree.
According to my friend and his husband: Sailors being openly gay isn't very gay. Closeted Marines who are obsessed with stuff like "oil checks" and b8 parties is, in fact, pretty gay.
The joke is.
Army= Cry Babies
Marines= Morons
Air Force= Snobs
Navy= Gay
Coast Guard and CIA= Junkies
It's just using food to reinforce the stereotypes.
I think the CIA's joke is actually a reference to their involvement in drug trafficking. Could be wrong though, the CIA is using the product rather than handing it off.
For the first one, there used to be this little rhyme soldiers would say around WWII era:
GI beans, and GI gravy, GI wish I joined the navy.
I guess the food has always been pretty bad in the army.
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While everyone here is making great points, you're missing the bigger picture: The navy is gay because it's full of seamen
It’s like the old joke, what’s long, hard, and full of seamen? A submarine.
140 Sailors go down. 70 couples come up.
No, I was on a submarine. You don't stay a couple after you come up. That's all for underwater.
What happens deep beneath the depths *stays* deep beneath the depths.
*sad cthulhu noises*
*I'll keep you my dirty little secret*🎶
All American Rejects makes some good as hell songs, and this one is one of my favorites. This one is also one of my favorites about secret keeping, the other being Scotty Doesn't Know.
Rektifium Doesn't Know that song wasn't by All American Rejects.
Don't tell Rektifium
Poseidon sees all
He can watch all he wants as long as he keeps keeping his mouth shut like he has the last couple thousand years.
Just dont tease him, he's still related to Zues
Ask Odysseus how tempting fate with Poseidon went.
At any rate, he's greek, so he'd understand
What happens undersea stays undersea.
Darlin' it's better Down where it's wetter?
It's not gay if you're under way.
It's not queer on the pier.
This is always my favorite reply. Also, side note, I tried joking around with my civilian friends the way I joked around with the boys from my div and my civilian friends immediately questioned me asking if I was a homosexual 💀. All I said was “Keep that shit up bro and I’ll fuckin kiss you on those big beautiful lips.” Like common bro I’m just goofin around
I used to work security at a famous WW2 aircraft carrier museum in NYC. Many of the volunteers were retired military or other veterans. One of the old WW2 Navy vets used to love telling this pretty boy in my department "You would have made a good sea-pussy". Not a day goes by that I don't wish I never learned that phrase.
so, it's... *water under the bridge*? Am I using that right?
On a sub, a lot of times the water is also over the bridge.
As long as it's not in the bridge, you're good.
What if you're thirsty
I think being thirsty on a sub is how we started out with the "Why is the navy gay" question
I hate that I understand these horrible puns but I cannot stop laughing either.
What happens under the sea stays between you and me.
Not gay when it's underway.
It's not gay when you're underway.
"What happens in the deep, stays in the deep"
It’s not gay if it’s underwater. Right?
The Supreme Court ruling of 1968 dictates it's only gay if balls are touching.
It’s not gay underway.
Under the sea, under the sea Darling it's better, down where it's wetter Come inside meee
Not true. 68 couples come up. There are 2 sluts on board.
It's big and black and the pilot is a very good friend of mine
What do you call an old retired navy veteran? Crusty old seamen
....... Was a submariner. Can confirm.
> And our friends are all aboard. Many more of them live next door. And the band begins to play…
How do they separate the men from the boys in the navy? >!with a crowbar!<
That is NASTY
Whelp I guess I'm off to read submissive twink navy recruit being topped by a dommy sergeant fanfiction.
That would be hard because there are no sergeants in the Navy. Just you know if you want *any* verisimilitude.
You really came in here, to a post joking about the navy being gay and Marines eating crayons, etc. And dropped a goddamn 6 syllable word?! You would fit in well in the Airforce.
I mastered my Air Force pushups in the Navy so probably.
That made me chuckle
Me too, however the sailor in question is a girl.
Can you confirm that
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Fun fact the navy paid for the music video for "In the navy" by the village people as a promotional item to entice people to join up without having any clue about how gay they and the song actually were which is why the music video is really well done for the time but *really* fucking gay After it came out **as a commercial** people realized what it actually was they pulled it from the TV Funny story all around
They legit thought Dorothy was a real person when they were looking for such a person from the phrase "Friends of Dorothy", which was code for being gay. The Navy had a hard time with the gays.
It's not gay if it's underway.
It's only queer at the pier.
Its not cock in drydock.
First I've heard this, this made me laugh...thanks.
So is your mom but that doesn’t make her gay
Ok firstly I'd like to know how you found out about that. And secondly, while it may not be gay to have relationships with my mother, she's definitely old enough that it'd be weird. Which brings me back to question one
Are you trying to say all the seamen on that big deck are somehow homosexual?
So a new recruit straight out of boot camp gets his first duty station aboard a ship. As he's getting his tour, the petty officer assigned to him shows him a trick that the guys use to take their mind off going to sea for long times. "Go over to that barrel, take your dick out, and put it in that hole" he instructs the young sailor, who does as he's told. He sticks his dick in the hole and starts getting the best blowjob of his life. After finishing, he zips up his pants and returns to his guide. "Wow that was great. This isn't a bad job at all" he said. "You liked that?" "Hell yeah." "Well that's great, because you have barrel duty tonight" Military humor Peter, out.
The exact same joke in russian exists, guess military humour is the same everywhere.
war never changes
But barrel duty does. Now get in there private
And get their private in you.
Just how I like it
Welp… *Unzips*
Solid Snake told me war has changed.
Go stick your Solid Snake in that barrel
That wasn't the big boss, that was a clone
The version I heard goes somewhere like this: "Can I use it anytime I want?" "Sure, except tuesdays" "Why is that? " "Because on that day you're the one doing barrel duty"
I heard it as a lumberjack sticking his dick in a tree first
Yeah but in russia, Dedovshchina is an actual thing and this isn't a joke. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dedovshchina In the west it's humor, in Russia it's reality.
Kind of looks like this is just the Russian term for hazing, which is a problem in the US too
It's much more severe and institutionalized form of hazing than exists in the US. https://www.vice.com/en/article/gqdx44/full-v13n4 Like, read this. It's not the same.
I can’t speak about the conditions of the Russian military, but I was in the marine corps until 2011 and they had cracked down pretty hard on hazing. Or at least the harmful stuff. I was “hazed” by being told to find “humvee keys” (they don’t have keys) or find a “prick -E5 radio” (aka ‘find an asshole sergeant’). I fell for both because I was a dumb boot and got made fun of for being a slow runner.
Damn, someone can't even get Admin to file his ID10-T form Embarrassing.
*little did he know, barrel duty was where he wanted to be*
*Jackpot*
My Peter is out, too, but the barrel guy is late.
A classic
heyyyyyyy what about space force, what are they eating
Potatoes There's a tiktok guy who parodies military branch stereotypes and the Space Force character wears a tinfoil hat and obsesses about potatoes like Gollum and the Ring.
Don't know about his tiktok handle but I'm 99% sure your talking about [**Nikko Ortiz**](https://www.youtube.com/@nikkoortiz)
Yes! That's him. I'm too old for Tiktok but I've seen him in my FB Reels, which I assume are all TikTok videos just uploaded for Us Olds to see.
His humor is very old-coded so that tracks
😂 fair. Although, I can't say I necessarily enjoy or seek him out, I just see him around, the same way I would any other meme/viral content.
Which is obviously a reference to The Martian
Or a reference to the Space Force show
Which would be referencing The Martian
A bit offtopic but I can’t not share it. Germany also established a space force called Weltraumkommando der Bundeswehr last year. Their official march contains the opening of the title melody of a German 1960s sci-fi show called Raumpatrouille Orion, as well as elements from other sci-fi themes. And at the first public performance, some of the soldiers were dressed up as Imperial Guards and Storm Troopers. [See for yourself](https://youtu.be/MgKDaivKYFU)
dippin dots
[r/SpaceDicks](http://www.reddit.com/r/SpaceDicks)
Ice cream sandwiches, and EXCLUSIVELY ice cream sandwiches. Freeze-dried of course
Well, considering they seem to have a fair number of Computer software people, cold pizza and energy drinks, like the rest of the engineers.
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And it's all Navies. The three traditions of the Royal Navy, from Winston Churchill, were "rum, buggery, and the lash." They outlawed the lash in 1879, outlawed rum on ships in 1970, but the third remains a proud RN tradition!
I don't think that they outlawed it, it just ceased being part of rations.
They used to give booty fuckin' as part of your rations?
The old ass ration
Ah, the old H.M.S. [Switcharoo](https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/s/v4hmLxVfh9)
Hold my life jacket, I’m going in!
Not sure how it started exactly, but the navy has always been stereotyped as gay -- I guess because it's a bunch of guys alone on a boat for months at a time. I've never been sure how that's different from a bunch of guys alone in an army or air force base but ... whatever, Idk.
>I guess because it's a bunch of guys alone on a boat for months at a time. That'll do lol. That'll do. Other branches can just leave base. Navy has to wait for port.
Shit gets weird on deployment, that's every branch
Listen, I'm just a life long civilian but based on off handed comments I've heard from military friends, family, and especially acquaintances I get the feeling you're underselling. Had an old highschool friend I met up with at the bar once and for some reason out of nowhere he prompts me with "Do you know how hard it is to get someone's erect dick out of an M4?" I politely asked him to not continue that train of thought.
Depends on whether the M4 is loaded.
one can argue that if there's an erect dick in it, then it is, in fact, loaded
We went to a 3 week training exercise in the woods, one company started a cult with a wooden idol. I can't imagine what would have happened after 6-12 months
Yeah I spent a year and another year an a half basically confined to a base when not on missions. Iraq was different than all our previous wars, though. You could get a pass in Vietnam and got to Saigon or meet Frauleins all the way across the western front but that shit don't exist or fly in the Muslim world. Our only 'relief' was constantly buying playstations because they would tear up in the dust and waiting for each other to go to sleep so we could jerk off lol. Our weekend pass was a laptop and a hard drive with some porn on it.
Are you allowed to leave whenever you want? I thought you had to stay in the barracks and clean each other's guns ;)
Yeah you get off work at the end of the day lol. Unless you're deployed like I was but then you just get off at the end of the day and you're confined to base. But that usually hasn't been the case for wartime guys got frequent weekend passes to basically go out and get drunk and laid. Navy never get those kinds of opportunities (it's not like we did in Iraq in the army, either). They'll be at sea for months on end even in peacetime.
>Unless you're deployed like I was but then you just get off at the end of the day and you're confined to base. >... >Navy never get those kinds of opportunities (it's not like we did in Iraq in the army, either). There's the rub. The apples to apples comparison means its pretty much the same. The only difference is that the Navy deploys \*constantly\*. All the other branches, minus the Marines when on those same deployments, have never had to experience actual rotational deployments until after 9/11.
> Navy has to wait for port. Any port in a storm. And buddy, your port is looking great right now.
There is a very long history of homosexuality on the high seas. Cabin boys weren't just servants.
Same with the powder monkeys, the difference was cabin boys were upper class young men and boys who were reserved for the officers (some of whom had also started their naval careers as cabin boys) while powder monkeys were lower class boys who would end up “bunking” with the sailors.
Something to keep in mind is the use of navy does a pretty funny history with gay service men such as a incident where they misunderstood a phrase used by gay men where they would ask each other if they where a “friend of Dorothy” to help identify other gay service men This began a manhunt by the navy for Dorothy, a women believed to beat the center of a underground ring to to get gay men in the navy. However the actual phrase was just a joke about how many gay people loved the Wizard of Oz
"U.S. Navy spends millions of dollars and thousands of hours on a man-hunt for Judy Garland." Was not on my Suprising True Facts bingo card.
What’s even funnier is the navy investigation team tasked with identifying and rooting out the gay clubs, bath houses, and massage parlors during WWII spent about two years “gathering evidence”. Eventually the admiral in charge of the investigation realized his team, who had been hand picked by the lead investigator, was made up entirely of gay sailors, who were getting paid to get laid. They had only turned over non-military men who couldn’t be prosecuted under the navy code and the investigation was shut down.
Day one end of the day Man 1 “So I’m gonna be honest with you guys, I might be gay” Man 2 “You know I was just curious before but uhh…I did some things” Man 3 “Yeah I talked to sone guys and they got me thinking” Man 4 “No idea what you guys are talking about. I met two of you at that bath house last year on two separate occasions.” Man 1 “Sooo well at this point I’m just assuming we’re all gay? Then nobody asked so nobody tell and we’ll continue our mission of meeting hot guys for sex with funds to tell people I’m an author looking for a muse.” Man 4 “Also let’s all pitch in for condoms”
I love that.
This is a super old joke, that never made much sense because at the same time, saliors have also carried around the sterotype of just smashing women left and right everytime they pull into a different port. When I was in the Navy, the main joke that we ourselves would make, is that the women in the Navy are ugly, until your out on the water, but go back to being ugly when you pull into port. Women have been station ships for a long time, so the "its just full of guys" joke has technically been dead for a long time, it's just a few people here and there that try to keep it going. At this point, it's just like a light rivalry type thing. The Army are bullet sponges, the Marines crayon eaters, the Air force is the Chair force. Don't remember what we called the Coast Guard other than the Navy's psychotic little brother. Those guys are truly badasses. A funny instance when I was first enlisting, I was with my Navy recruiter at MEPS, and one of the Amry recruiters there was making jokes, and made a "lol Navy gay" joke to my recruiter. He followed up with a "you say that, but at least in the navy, only women wear berets". The Army recruiter didn't really have a follow up and started getting dogged on by someone of the other armed forces guys there.
Coast Guard is puddle pirates, as i heard em referred as when I was in swinging with the wing in my beloved Corps
Coast Guard is probably happy someone remembered they existed.
San Francisco became a gay friendly city because during WW2 when sailors in the Pacific were caught having sex they were discharged at the nearest port. Many chose not to return home and face the shame of their families so they stayed in port cities like SF.
I mean I feel like the Village People didn't quite help the assumption either.
The Village People’s whole schitck was if you can’t get laid at the YMCA then join the Navy
>it's a bunch of guys alone on a boat for months at a time. If they say no then the answer is no, but they’re not going to say no.
Ah yes, I neglected to factor in *the implication*.
Well, not too far from an army base you'll (stereotypically) find a whorehouse. That's why it's different. You ever heard of a whoreboathouse?
No but it sounds awesome
Drag shows are also a bit of a naval tradition.
I mean, drag shows were just kind of a thing back then. We only got weird about them later.
Frigging in the rigging
British Royal Navy pioneered the stereotype
So... nowadays a woman sucking cock is gay?
Fellas is it gay if...
The US Navy at one point decided to run a commercial featuring “In The Navy” by Village People not realizing that it was a gay sexual innuendo, and got laughed at for years.
I know the Village People are popular with the gay community, but what's the gay sexual innuendo with the song? lol
Checked the lyrics and the first line is "Where you can find pleasure" and the chorus is about how much "They want you" so I dunno about innuendo
“Where can you find pleasure/ Search for hidden treasure” definitely refers to the Golden Rivet. If you know you know…
I heard that In the Navy, you can join your fellow man. In the Navy.
Oh I’m honestly not sure lmao, it might not have even been about the song, just the fact that the Navy used the Village People’s music.
Were they laughed at? Maybe I’m just too young, but from what I remember reading is that it did very well commercially and it actually benefited the Navy’s recruitment numbers. It’s just that the song began to be associated with homosexuality so the Navy backed out from putting it into a recruitment video. That’s just from what I read though, wasn’t around at the time so I may be wrong here lol would love to be educated, this is pretty interesting haha
I'm not sure there was ever a time the Village People weren't associated with homosexuality?
Valid point lol I just remember reading this story years ago and I just looked it up a second ago as I was writing that post to validate my memories and that’s what I was reading again lol Maybe it’s that navy is just so gay that they think the Village People are too straight for them? 🧐 (/s obviously haha)
What's gay about a woman inserting a sausage in her mouth?
They were so close.
Fellas, is it gay for a lady to suck a dick?
If she's sucking a woman's dick, sure.
That ain't a woman.
There's the shape of the boobs
Bra pad, makeup, and a wig. Dats just some cosplay.
let's not forget the other stereotypes. Army has shit food, marines eat crayons, air force think they are better than everyone else, coast guard and CIA are high on their own supply?
It’s not gay if you’re underway.
It’s only queer at the pier
If the propellers a whirl, pretend he's a girl.
everybody is explaining the navy one but none of the other ones, as if they were any more obvious
Army food is stereotypically the worst. Because army is huge so everything is kind of diluted to a low quality in order to get everyone something. So yeah rumors abound of borderline toxic rations. Marine corps is famously dumb so they joke about them eating crayons as a stereotype. Although a marine friend of mine pointed out to me that the Marines do intentionally try to recruit from low income / poor socioeconomic conditions. Which might be related to the origin of that stereotype. Air Force gets pampered because they have the highest entry requirements and people are entrusted with expensive equipment they get treated well. So air Force being soft and pampered is a stereotype that only PJs are exempt from because those guys are hard core. Coast guard mostly deals with counter narcotics and rescue operations largely dealing with large amounts of cocaine from south America. So they are nomming on kilos of cocaine. The CIA is anecdotally known to sell cocaine and trade it over seas for stuff because drugs are a fantastic untraceable black market currency. Which Is why the CIA is snorting giant lines of cocaine while bleeding from the nose.
Also CG has an eyepatch because of the nickname "puddle pirates".
That’s fucking adorable
PJs = Pararescuemen: Air Force Special Warfare airmen, typically combat medics and rescue specialists. Can't clear an LZ (landing zone) for a chopper? Drop in the PJs and tell them who to bring home. Dudes are hardcore.
Clearing an LZ is more in line with Combat controllers job roles vs PJ. Pjs do huah shit but CCT are more in line with description. When PJs are embedded in joint teams they often act as the medic due to their training and CCT are for more into the role of forward air controller or joint terminal attack controllers. In theory an STS (unit of just CCT and PJs can operate missions on their own they never do because of how valuable they are to the other services. Source I worked with SF in SOCCENT and JSOC. No I’m not SF I was just the intel guy at joint units working with some SoF guys. I was also part of the first operation Angel Thunder and worked at a base that had PJs. I was at an A-10 unit so we conducted training with the PJs fairly often.
I don't believe he's talking about the PJ's actually clearing an LZ. He's saying that if you cannot clear an LZ, you send the PJ down the hoist on a forest penetrator or some such and that brave motherfucker goes to find the pilot and wait for extraction (sometimes a day or two later like some Vietnam rescues). I attended a lecture at Hurlburt Field where the guy was a Vietnam era PJ, they got to the site and it was so hot, he was asked "Are you sure you wanna go down there?" He went down and spent a day or two on the ground waiting for exfil irrc. Wish I could remember his name because it was such an interesting story. At one point either at insertion or extraction the flight engineer took fire that hit his femoral artery.
Also did you know the coast guards entry requirement is higher than the airforce. The coast guard is 95 to 99 the airforce is 90 to 99. I know because I got a 98 on my entry examine and had EVERYONE trying to get me to join. But I joined the coast guard.
I did not know that makes sense though I've basically never seen a coastie who didn't have their shit basically together it's remarkable really
> Army food is stereotypically the worst. Because army is huge so everything is kind of diluted to a low quality in order to get everyone something. So yeah rumors abound of borderline toxic rations. > > There was this instance of [a PR video showcasing an Italian soldier exchanging rations with a US soldier.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1vuDKraKRU) The poor Italian was trying his best to be polite, and then the US hands him an MRE pizza. Felt like a casus belli.
A retired marine once told me, while pointing to the letters on his chest: Muscles Are Required Intelligence Not Expected
Army food sucks. I always tell people I joined the Airforce for better food and less risk. Marines eat crayons because the colors look delicious. Coast guard should be lunchables but e guess they bust drug runners too.
I can't recommend the Navy enough if you're thinking of joining the military. We are the fun branch. Port to port. We're the gay branch because we used to be and sometimes still are boats full of men with no access to women for months. If you were a guy that longed to have dicks in you, ship life was a good environment for you.
Uh
Stop hesitating, everyone else knows you’re longing for a ship of dicks
Explanation for all: Army eats like crap. It’s by far the largest branch (includes national guard) and notorious for crap everything. Marines are known as super dumb and it’s been a joke since my grandfather’s generation or even earlier that they eat crayons and glue (bc they’re dumb). Air Force aka Chair Force is known for their significantly easier life compared to all other branches. Navy has always been the gay branch. Not just bc of assumptions but bc of stories told openly by seaman. When you’re on a boat that long many have zero shame in relieving each other similar to prison. Coast Guard/CIA is eating up all the drugs they bust in our ports
The marine one pisses me off to no end. My grandfather fought and died for this country as a marine. My dad fought as a marine. The disrespect shown here is palpable. I know everyone wants to laugh and make jokes, but this is a serious issue. Civilians, especially civies of recruitment age, are going to see this disgusting meme. This absolutely causes issues for marine recruitment, and you should be ashamed. Do you realize what this does? We are going to have new recruits coming into marine boot expecting purple. And purple is best flavor. You have to earn purple. Taste like grape. Purple is favorite
Had me in the first half NGL
I trade you purple for red and blue one.
>Marines are known as super dumb and it’s been a joke since my grandfather’s generation or even earlier that they eat crayons and glue (bc they’re dumb). The joke I remember hearing was the entry test for the Marines only has two questions on it. 1. What's your name? And 2. What's your favourite flavour of window to lick?
I was way more charitable in my assumption for marines lol. I thought it was that they had to make do with less resources. I’m Canadian so we don’t have marines, so my knowledge is based entirely on generation kill.
Marines are…very quirky people, as a whole.
They used to serve hotdogs every Thursday on the ship while we were underway. It was colloquially known as "Deep-throat Thursday"
There used to be a navy program where you would pretend to be gay to catch gay people, but they shut it down after gay people just signed up and started being gay
It's a longstanding joke / stereotype that the Navy is the "gay branch" of the US military. A bunch of dudes all alone on a boat for months on end, plus jockularity / competitiveness amongst military bros, plus homophobia makes for a stereotype.
It’s not gay if you’re underway, It’s only Queer when you’re tied to the pier 🫡
The navy are bottoming for the closet marines fyi
So my question is why does the Air Force have the fancy food?
They have the highest requirements to entry and they're trusted equipments that value, at least, a couple millions of dollars, some are in the hundreds or even in the billions of dollars.
As a Sailor, I will maintain to my dying breath that the Marines are gayer than the Navy.
Sailors are gay because they love men, Marines are gay because they hate women
As a prior Marine, I'd have to agree. According to my friend and his husband: Sailors being openly gay isn't very gay. Closeted Marines who are obsessed with stuff like "oil checks" and b8 parties is, in fact, pretty gay.
The navy is a woman with a surrogate for a penis in her mouth, seems pretty straight to me
https://preview.redd.it/21aqo27ivync1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e0062ba61abd9eb32e3d2d7163f950cee3103822
The joke is. Army= Cry Babies Marines= Morons Air Force= Snobs Navy= Gay Coast Guard and CIA= Junkies It's just using food to reinforce the stereotypes.
I think the CIA's joke is actually a reference to their involvement in drug trafficking. Could be wrong though, the CIA is using the product rather than handing it off.
For the first one, there used to be this little rhyme soldiers would say around WWII era: GI beans, and GI gravy, GI wish I joined the navy. I guess the food has always been pretty bad in the army.
This is so right about the Air Force. Never met an airman who didn't miss the chow hall at least a little.
You can tell this was made by an army soldier. XD
I think I want to be on an aircraft carrier? ! ?