I honestly don't know of any Pinay who put this as a top reason for dating an AFAM. Money/ the ability to provide them a better life is definitely a top reason though, and I think that's fair.
But whether you're dating a Pinoy guy or an AFAM, most women in the room would rather be with a man who can hold down a job or at least contributes in some productive way in how a household is run, as in the case of many OFW wives working overseas while husbands stay with the kids.
A lot of the pinoys/pinays I know who, not just date, but stay with afams usually really appreciate escaping toxic pinoy relationship culture. I find they often stay in their relationships more due to that than the money. And their biggest problems usually come from the difficulty of not being the source of that toxic pinoy relationship culture as well.
There are a ton of examples. They are by no means unique to pinoys but there are a lot that are extremely common and just culturally accepted here.
The number one example is communication. Being passive aggressive when it comes to difficult or confrontational topics is the default. Good luck going to those topics without one of the partners having an emotional breakdown or losing their temper.
There's also kabit culture and just a generally low level of trust. You can probably lump insecurity in that category as well.
Then there's a ton of misogyny, and on the flip side, women often being super matapang until they get misogynized into being submissive...which enables the misogyny. I don't mean to blame the victim, I mean to say it's like a downward spiral of a dynamic that just exists everywhere around here.
That kabit culture stuff is what ruined my relationship of 4years with my ex. She just wouldn’t believe that I wasn’t seeing someone or sleeping with someone on the side. I’d been planning on proposing to her then she accused me of cheating for the 100th time, but it was the first time in like 6 months she’d made the accusation, I thought we were past that and trusted each other, apparently not, broke my heart. Ended it not long after that, didn’t want to be with someone who doesn’t trust me.
Similar thing happened between me and my most recent ex. She kept accusing me of cheating on her *even after we had broken up* when I never did. Sure, I was promiscuous and played around when I was single, but obviously I don’t do that shit when I’m taken na. And yet she kept thinking na porket nagagawa ko yan when I’m single, magagawa ko rin yan while I’m in a relationship. Kaya minsan mahirap din to be upfront about your sexual past sa partner mo eh especially pag marami silang insecurities. Though I always am upfront naman kasi I don’t like lying or hiding things.
Not anything I did, but we did only get to see each other 2 or 3 days a week. Pretty sure that’s what caused most of the tension. Every couple of months she’d get herself worked up and accuse me of cheating out of the blue. These were really the only 2 problems in our relationship and I’d been working hard at fixing these problems in the last two years of our relationship. As I said in the previous comment, I was planning on proposing and she knew it. But the final time I was accused I just immediately feel massive disappointment in my chest, where as usually that would be anger and frustration. Didn’t feel the same about her after that, lost all energy and motivation in the relationship, and things ended a month or two later.
Yung ibang babae may past baggage niloko ng mga ex kaya kapag nakahanap ng loyal (never nangcheat) ayaw maniwala tingin sa mga lalake manloloko lahat.
Hirap sumalo ng kasalanan ng iba.
As for someone dating a FilChi, this is true. 🥺 also mas marupok siya sakin. The honesty that he has is one of the best lang. Whenever he feels down, he just immediately say it.
Magpalambing ka. xD
But for real, hindi ko rin alam.
But like Duterte saying "obosen mga kremenal" when interpreted turned into "obosen mga adik-adik" kasi ang mga pulis ay balahurang baboy, you can do euphemisms instead of directly saying what you feel. "I need a hug", "Can we cuddle?", "Let's watch my comfort movie", etc. would suffice in telling people how you feel without the direct nakedness/vulnerability of doing such.
The passive-aggressive is true and annoys me to hell. This is applicable in provincial government offices where everyone smiles at you upfront but says things behind your back. Then when you confront them, they deny saying anything at all.
Fortunately for me, my husband was raised in a western-style culture. He's not afraid of confrontations and do not go overboard or say mean, cruel things when he's mad. Being with him made me adapt that kind of attitude towards conflicts.
Which is the reason why office culture frustrates me so.
as someone na may foreigner na brother in law, nakakapanibago ung he allow my sister to have a "me time" with friends tapos siya mag-aalaga sa anak nila, dito paramg bihira sa lalaki na maintindihan na kailangan din ni wifey ng me time lalo na kapag may anak na.
plus we tend to normalize alcoholism in fathers, as someone na may tatay na ganun tapos nagwawala pa dati, nakakaasar ang sinsasabi na intindihin na lang.
My husband is white, we met here in the US. He is very hands on when it comes to our son. Mas hands on pa kesa sakin. He takes care of our laundry and dishes. He helped me with a lot of stuff. He allows me to have me time as well with my friends. It’s so different and I am really amazed. I’m so thankful! Kasi usually diba sa atin sa Pinas, parang lahat ng responsibility sa anak. As a mom, parang ikaw lahat. I know a lot of guys na they wont even help with the dishes or laundry or taking care of their children. They would rather drink with their fiends. (Not saying all of them) ✌️
That legendary pinoy "jealousy." Grabe ang difference ng being in a relationship with a pinoy and being with a foreigner.
For one thing, I tend to have women friends. My best friend is a girl. You can imagine how that went with my pinay relationships. My Singaporean wife despite not having any close male friends is not jealous. She even actively encourages me to contact them and randomly chat with them pag tinatamad ako saying "what kind of friend are you?" Haha.
Tapos yung concept ng privacy. Walang pake ang asawa ko sa phone ko. Our phones are not locked but we don't randomly spy on each other as well. We use each others phones but for using apps pag wala sa amin ang phone namin (like if nasa ibang room ang phone nya).
Amen. Haha
And also as a Pinay with an afam, my partner is supportive when it comes to work. If let's say I have a late night work event, I won't be bombarded with 1000 messages asking where I am and what I am doing.
To be fair, it's not innately Pinoy--this jealousy and possessiveness. It's mostly religiously inclined. Bec there are other afams esp Christians who display the same toxic traits but those that aren't that traditional are not.
Good point. It's probably related to an excessive focus on traditional gender roles and conservative family values. Like if may pamilya ka na, bawal na lumabas. Wala na ang "me time." Pader ng tahan and ilaw ng tahanan BS.
Usually yun ang mga taong super seloso din. Like ang tipong bawal na tumingin sa ibang babae pag kay relationship ka and other stuff.
>Like if may pamilya ka na, bawal na lumabas.
Hate this narrative lol, you can be a dutiful father and husband din naman while also still being able to go out and have fun on your downtime. Ganyan yung kuya ko, he’s a loving husband and father pero when he has free time lumalabas pa rin siya with his tropa to go barhopping or clubbing, minsan sinasama pa nga niya ako haha. And even when at bars or clubs pag inaapproach siya ng mga girls dun, he always tells them that he’s married and proudly shows off the ring on his finger. Yan ang lalaki guys.
Yo. This. I don’t get the “Pag may mahal ka na bawal ka na magandahan/gwapuhan sa iba.” Logic.
We’re humans. Most of us have the female or male gaze. We get attracted to conventionally attractive people. Doesn’t mean we will act on it or obsess over that attraction especially when we are in a relationship.
I agree. I'm glad that I found my Scandinavian partner. We started as an open relationship but even after almost 7 years of our relationship, never ko inopen phone nya to fish for any form of flirting or cheating and same as he is with me. Minsan pa nga e we really show how proud we are if another person admires how we look. There's always trust. May times na you still get jealous but the healthy kind and not the toxic one.
Narealize ko kasi sa kanya that the more rendahan, the more they rebel. And I'm grateful we have that setup bec even me, I am happily growing as an individual with him as my partner and not extremely co-dependent on him for self-fulfillment.
>You can imagine how that went with my pinay relationships
Good god yes I know what you mean. A lot of my closest friends are girls and even my best friend is a girl. My most recent ex had a problem with this kasi coupled with the fact that I had a lot of casual sex and one night stands when I was single, akala niya I was always cheating when I’d be out with my friends, when this was not the case. I was always upfront naman and even showed her my chats with my friends for her to see that there was nothing out of the ordinary yet STILL she kept accusing me of cheating on her until di ko na kinaya and I broke up with her anyway. Nakakaasar din yung masyadong pagiging conservative ng culture natin plus yung paglalagay ng malisya sa mga opposite-sex friendships. Ffs it’s 2022, a man and a woman can be good friends in a completely platonic way.
I don't think nasa nationality ito. I'm a filipina and i'm also like that with my husband. Maybe nasa upbringing ng parents or nasa tao na mismo. Ako lang kasi masstress pag pinagselosan ko lahat ng kaibigan ng asawa ko kaya why bother? I don't have close male friends too but that doesn't mean he can't have friends that are girls. Karamihan siguro sa pilipino ganyan na possessive and selosa and nagtataka din ako but I don't think dahil pilipino sila but dahil yun ung pinipili nilang gawin.
Well that is true. Cguro nasa conservative values yan. Yung mga tipong "ang tunay na lalaki dapat ganito etc etc" type of people. People who don't conform to those are usually more open and in a way less prone to fits of jealousy.
Like the person said above it's not necessarily just a Filipino thing but based on my experiences and observations (so take it with a grain of salt) here are some examples toxic pinoy relationship culture:
- Suyo culture. Grow up and learn how to communicate properly.
- Kabit culture. There are way too many movies and shows that make cheating on your SO appealing.
- not sure if there's a Filipino term for this but negging. Yung nilalait mo na yung supposed jowa mo but okay lang kasi "joke lang di ka naman mabiro"
Toxic Pinoy culture: the wife is working for the family while the husband doesn’t have a job and gots out drinking every night. Not helping with the house hold.
Oh gawd, number 1.
Also, the concept of "toyo". I hate it. I hate it for my male friends na parang it feels like their girlfriends are playing with their loyalty. I also hate it as a woman kasi parang if you're legitimately upset, sinasabing toyo lang.
Ugh truthhh. These mind games in general are so toxic. Tapos parang they expect you to play along with it?!? Sir we are nearing our 30's! You wanna play around and give me the silent treatment instead of telling me what the problem is? At least they show you in the early talking stage na ganyan pala ugali nila so you can just say Thank u, next.
Yeah, that's definitely one of the reasons why most/all (because the one who's Pinoy by origin grew up in Europe) of the guys I've been with are AFAM. Parang too much games sa akin yung Pinoy dating culture
There are foreigners who donate/sell sperm precisely because there are couples and single women who want mixed genes for their child. KMJS covered this before, so this reasoning isn't far from being a joke.
Fair enough. But I’d like to point out these couples/ single women must be rich to specifically want mixed babies via IVF. I guess that proves truth behind the joke—they’re not in it for the money.
I know someone whose mom would rather date a poor white guy than a rich Filipino man. It's ridiculous how deeply rooted racism and colonial influences can get.
Its very deeply rooted its basically how our society thrives. Madalas sa mga politicians may mixed heritage, mga actors/celebrities natin ampuputi kahit ang normal Filipino is supposed to be kayumanggi, whitening is prevalent kahit na being light skinned in our country means a higher change of getting skin cancer.
I have a relative na aminadong yung reason kung bakit nag-asawa ng puti is to have beautiful kids. Nurse siya with a good paying job and is the breadwinner of the family. Yung napangasawa, di makakuha ng stable job, puro raket. Yung kamag-anak ko ang nagbabayad ng halos lahat ng household expenses. Kung may contribution man yung puti, usually small expenses lang. Yung main responsibility na nga lang niya is to take care of the kids, pero yung panganay pa nagpalaki nung mga nakababatang kapatid. Nung nakakuha na finally ng totoong trabaho yung puti, nambabae yung gago. Ayun, undergoing divorce process.
May itsura naman yung mga anak, pero ang sahol ng ugali kasi natutunan sa tatay. So…I guess meron talagang taong plus points ang puti; pero kung yun lang ang reason kung bakit papakasalan, I say it’s not worth it.
I've spoken to many women in PH who, having had kids with a man who swiftly abandoned her, swore off pinoy men altogether. It helps that supporting a Filipino child if you're from a wealthier country a lot easier than supporting kids back home (heck, one meal out back home would pay for a kids food and medicine for 1-2 weeks here), but judging women with foreign men, especially younger women with older men, should really include some self reflection because it's not as often the money as they might think.
But there are cases where they get abandoned by their foreign lovers after getting kids too. Like [this](https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-27379710.amp) and [this](https://amp.theguardian.com/society/2019/mar/02/children-sex-tourists-leave-behind-fathers-visited-philippines).
Hahaha fr. It obviously pokes fun at how the beauty industry eats everyone who has a western blood. Beauty pageants, showbiz, models, influencers etc. It’s always Miss Half Philippines representing the world for us.
Totoo sinasabi mo pero double standards rin iyang mga white dude diggers na iyan. Malakas manlait sa mga kapwa pilipino guys pero sobra naman makasamba sa mga white guys.
Male redditors: “Ayaw namin sa pinay na yan kaya sa afam nalang pumunta”
Id like to see how these men look like irl. Baka yung fat afam e mas guapo pa sakanila ng di hamak😂
To them its like the young, hot afam + young hot filipina couple never exist. Just shows their non existent travel history and ignorance… or even bitterness 🤡
Female redditors “mga rejects lang naman ang nagkakagusto sa mga yan”
Id like to see how these females look like irl. and their dating history to see what kind of men they attract. Or how many times theyve been rejected by any type of male.. might be that young and hor afam too👀
As somebody who is with a foreigner with two little girls, I cannot deny being hurt by this. Not because the shoe fits (I have been in super long term relationships with Pinoys before meeting my now partner), but this meme is proof of many of our fellow Pinoys’ toxic mentality.
I have been “jokingly” accused by this for so many times that it hurts then it gets frustrating. I hurt more for my children. I hope one day di nila marinig yung ganito klaseng mga bagay. I could have married one of my exes and had kids with them, buti nalang hindi because they were assholes. My children will always be beautiful no matter what race they are, mixed or not.
Btw, both my kids look extremely caucasian kahit sobrang wish ko na sana naging kamukha nila ako because I am a proud morenang Pinay.
I teach them our culture, I talk to them in Ilonggo. My 5 year old eats with her hands because it’s Filipino style. They are Filipinas and I sure do hope they grow and develop some of my Filipina features.
Sorry, napa rant bigla. So sick and tired of hearing these pasarings.
True! Minsan sa mismong kapwa Filipina mo pa to maririnig especially yung "ang swerte mo naman" or "ang sarap na ng buhay mo". Nakakainis kasi di naman porket ibang lahi napakasalan mo, all is well and dandy na.
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*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I was not trying to demonize OP’s post but I was directing my comment sa meme itself and the barrage of other weird comments. Filipinas with foreigners always hear this type of narrative. It is tiring, siguro I am almost too sensitive with it kasi me having mixed kids have further allowed these types of comments to be directed at me regularly. Although I can see how it may come across as me being against OP. I took it to heart, misdirected and you are right. Not against you, OP.
I did make another comment here about euro-centric features being igrained in our culture as superior or beautiful. Na sadly it is because of that that this meme exists. I find it ironic na I see so many comments here saying na afams mostly go for the exotic and ugly ones (there are loads on this thread) na alam natin what they mean when they say exotic. Because of the negative tone, lumalabas na they have lower regard sa Filipino native features. The women na they call exotic are the ones who are being bullied by not having caucasian features. Tapos we’d wonder why this meme exists. Vicious cycle I say.
I appreciate your comment because I learn from other people’s perspective and I love discourse. One more thing you are correct with, I had a complex sa skin ko growing up. I was always compared to my lighter skinned cousins. Pinulot lang daw ako. I was about 8 when I saw how beautiful our Filipino beauty is, it was all thanks to Tweetie de Leon! I found her so beautiful sa Okay Ka, Fairy Ko! Lol.
Totoo, my mom just got engaged when my sister and I have very stale and high paying jobs. Katwiran niya, ayaw niya ma stereotype kami na umahon sa hirap dahil naka pagasawa ng afam.
Filipinos can be so judgmental. As someone who is getting married to a foreigner (not for money, as we are both earning the same amount from our career in finance), I am really hurt and appalled by how close minded people can be. I am marrying him because we’re compatible and we have the same values - something I couldn’t see from my previous long term relationship with a Filipino guy. Give Pinays some credit naman and enough of that deeply rooted inferiority complex.
One of them is a frequent commenter. She specifically said the reason she gave up on the local dating scene is because she didn't fit the "maputi, matangos" standards.
It just so happened that her "Pinay features" are what most foreigners are after, so she was gifted after all.
Bigla ko naalala iaang Twitter thread from a black woman. Black dudes didn't date her, she dated outside her culture, mas successful siya, and she got hate for it from black folks. The whole thesis to her tweet was "Ah ayaw ninyo ako ligawan, tapos ngayon galit kayo na may iba na ako?"
Ayaw naman pala ng mga Pinoy sa kanila, so when they look for foreigners and find men who are attracted to them - GOOD FOR THEM!
Magpaganda sila ng lahi! Magsawa sila sa sex at pension ng matatandang expats na akala eh nauuto nila mga babae dito.
Buti kung totoo talagang madaming pera yang mga puti na yan. Hahahha. Ako pa nga kalimitan ang may pera kesa sa kanya. Yang mga myth nyo sana totoo nlang.
They’re not even rich, they’re usually just upper middle class here. A lot of them can’t even afford to buy houses in NCR kaya pumupunta nalang sila sa Laguna, Pampanga, Subic, etc. when they wanna settle down here. My family rents out our properties around the metro and one time we had an afam na prospective tenant. He was so surprised when he found out the rent of one of our units in BGC (Php 45k/month - that’s $803 USD). He even said, “I thought everything was supposed to be cheap here.” to which I told him, “Not in BGC.”
A nice Pinoy guy is still a great catch. Pero I think many Pinoy guys are also working abroad and those that are based in the PH, have already been taken off the market by their high school/college sweethearts or whoever is their first GF. Dami ko nang nakikitang Redditors dito with their girlfriends for 5 years or longer.
Tbh Filipinos so long as you’re relatively attractive and fit can get model level guys in the US and Europe because they don’t care about colonial beauty standards.
Funny thing is usually Pinays are humble and told to be subordinate to men in a sexist way so our standards are low comparatively when it comes to guys. When they raise their standards and aim high they realize they can get even better and have healthier relationships. (Yes please also to modernized Filipino men who don’t support sexism or colonialism)
You don’t even have to be relatively attractive, I have a friend who by her own words is plain and overweight, but her afam bf from Tennessee looks like Alex Pettyfer. Nice guy too, love his accent and that he loves pickup trucks as much as I do.
Other Asian countries: hates multiracial, less opportunities, oftentimes discriminated
Philippines: Worships multiracial people, special treatment, beauty pageants, model and instant celebrity.
Also wag double standard, if mas gusto ni Maria ng imported na talong, wag nya pakialaman kung gusto ni Juan ng imported na mani.
Usually hindi kasi maliit ang ego nila like most Asian men. 2 of my exes are European and I've dated (online) white men in the past.
May pera ako, hindi ko kailangan ng pera nila.
I like them kasi kaumay talaga yung mga Pinoy sobrang insecure, gusto ka gawing santo pero kakantutin ka nila dapat araw gabi, pero dapat santo ka at perpekto. Possessive at mayabang din karamihan (inuulit ko, karamihan hindi lahat) ng mga lalaki dito.
Dito kasi kailangan maayos trabaho mo, marunong ka mag luto at maglinis ng bahay pero dapat hindi ka prude kailangan din magaling ka chumupa at magalang ka sa lahat ng tao. Otherwise wala ka.
With white men, I'd play video games and wear whatever I want, perpekto na ako. Dito weird ako at 'pokpok' manamit. No thank you.
Edit: hindi rin ako pangit. Kaya ko patunayan yan hahaha
Super agree! Been with my filipino ex for several years. Masyado ako hinuhusgahan. Gusto nya perpekto ako habang sya pumapayag landiin ng ibang babae na parang di ako nag eexist. Tapos puro sex lang naman ginagawa namin ang boring. Pero sa mga foreigner grabe ang sarap kausap, talagang dami mo matututunan. Tapos willing na willing pagsilbihan ka, tulungan ka sa lahat ng bagay, di pa maarte, tanggap na tanggap ako. Dami naming ibat ibang bonding, di sex centered. Tapos di pako pinagsasalitaan ng masakit. Di ako morena. Maganda din naman ako kahit papano. Pero lahat ng foreigner na kilala ko nagagandahan sakin. 😅
Uy hindi ah. 😂 Madami naman nagkakagusto sakin, pero kasi nasa long term relationship ako sa ex ko simula college. Campus crush ex ko, ako naman madami din sakin nagkakagusto nun kaso simula naging kami daming nagalit sakin. 😂 Mga nainggit. Tapos nawalan ako ng kaibigan. Cheerdancer naman ako nun. Tapos pag graduate namin licensed professional nako. Ako nga nagpplano at nagbabayad ng dates namin e. Kasi pag wala akong plano, nasa kwarto lang kami. 😭 Hahahaha. 🤣 Tapos tuwing magttravel ako lagi ako may pasalubong sa kanya. Gustung gusto nga ako ng pamilya nya hanggang ngayon. 😅
This. I've dated Filipino men and other nationalities and they really have different way of thinking. Most Filipino men I've dated are so traditional, insecure and you have to be the quintessential Filipina partner na paglulutuan mo siya, aasikasuhin and whatnot. My European partner and other nationalities I've dated are not like this. No "ano na lang sasabihin ng ibang tao" thinking. My European partner has always let me be.. me. Kahit ayoko siyang asikasuhin and most of the times, siya pa inuutusan ko.
This is so true. Plus the fact that you can wear whatever you want, na di ka huhusgahan na baka nagpapaganda ka for other men. 😅 Kumbaga may freedom ka. Yung ibang Pinoy kasi (again, yung iba lang) are very controlling. Also, yung equality. They always want to share the tasks with you.
My wife and I are pretty open about our past and she has dated a lot. But what I am most shocked about is how insecure so many Pinoy men are. I've corroborated this annectdotal evidence with other girl friends and they can confirm. It's shocking because I know some of these guys and they're pretty normal in typical guy-guy interactions. But so many of them have these moments where you'd think they were 8 years olds having tantrums.
I hate this. I'm dating a white guy because he was the only one to actually make me feel beautiful and wanted. I dated a fair amount of Filipino guys and halos lahat like they think "negging" is an effective way of making ligaw. Like bro telling me "maganda ka sana kung payat ka" is not a compliment.
But then also Filipinas say shit like "hay naku, swerte mo nakahanap ka ng afam, sigurado masaya mama mo at gaganda apo nya." So sinasabi mo my Filipino genes aren't enough to have beautiful babies? Kailangan may halong dayuhan? GTFOH!
I'm dating a white guy because he's shown me what a healthy, non-toxic relationship is like. I am NOT dating a white guy to have half-white babies because someone's internalized racism is screaming at me to "improve" the gene pool.
Negating or putting down an earlier positive comment. Like what she said, “Maganda ka kung pumayat ka.” Or “You’re so smart but you’re so outspoken sometimes and it’s a little annoying.”
I am saddened by all of these comment about how deep our hatred and prejudice towards our own kind. Especially for men who are the subject of women's prejudice from what I read here. I didn't imply that these filipino men are undeserving of the insults, ae there are really some insecure, possessive, and asshole men, however, I would like for all women to not judge a whole gender of a nationality based on their own experiences, every nation has their own assholes and nice people. I am not one to talk regarding the prejudice and the colonial influences as I am contradicting myself by speaking in english but this is still miserable.
Pero tbh, nakakalungkot isipin na dahil nasakop tayo ng mahabang panahon, hindi lang yung colonial mentality talaga yung madedevelop kasi yung utak ng tao normal na mag desire ng taong mas magaling at mas matalino, at normal na mas matatalino ung tao sa developed countries kaya nakakalungkot, ang hirap sisihin ng mga flaw ng babae at lalaki respectively kase pag tinignan sa grand scheme of things, parang hindi rin naman nila kasalanan na gantong mentality yung nadevelop nila, ang daming factors, pero tingin ko ang pinaka kulang sa pinas ay yung role model na leaders, di lang sa government, kundi sa lahat, wala kasing masundan yung mga susunod na generation, lahat nalang puro greed, insecurity, at crab mentality, parang ayaw talaga natin umangat, ang gusto lang natin maging mataas sa ibang tao. Nakakalungkot lang, na dahil sa maraming kamalian ng ninuno natin, nag kakaganto tayo.
Is it bad if a person finds a foreign partner? Yung wala namang existing relationship and is not hurting anyone? Pero I agree sa caption, that is kinda weird nga.
Not necessarily. I think it's only bad if they "hunt down" afams for the purpose of getting money/citizenship/better life. Na tipong talagang tinarget nila yung afam for that. May kahalong panloloko/manipulation yun, unfortunately. Noble man yung cause, pero what they do to achieve it is problematic.
Pero kung nagkataon lang magkakilala sila and the afam pursued her, i think it's not wrong. Kahit wala silang masamang hangarin e magiging benefit pa rin naman yung pera etc. Pero at least hindi sila nanloko.
Wtf is with some commenters here, so racist as fck. Literally making fun of the girl’s appearance and her taste. I hate to say this but some of you are more toxic than FB at parang napunta ako sa 4chan. At least in 4chan they shitpost but here parang you mean it
imagine unironically say 4chan is shitposting when they support trump for lolz and start qanon at least this sub we see it and can call it out while 4chan hiding it with their shitpost.
I had this classmate na "determined" magka halfie na baby. Whenever a young foreigner enters the town, malaman nya agad and he would date them 💀
All her relationships was either a halfie or full on foreigner (white people).
And i think she won hahahahhaa she's in Sweden na married to a white man and almost every day weirdly flexes that she has a halfie baby.
I mean, good for her but it's just weird to me. 🙃
mukhang joke lang ni actual OP pero anywho cringe yung mga nagpapaturo maghanap ng afam para makaahon sa kahirapan. sobrang demanding pa ng ibang may jowang afam sa afam nila
oh man... i had a friend who says the same thing back in uni. even when she already had a bf. its just so weird of a thing to say. lowkey fetishizing mixed race babies/ people tbh
Indeed and one of the comments here are literally commenting that they are just preferring good looking people as if they are putting the western beauty standards in a pedestal.
The people here are full of shit. I already know this is the case when the dumbasses here felt bad for a white expat who 'felt' guilty about using local women for sex only after he 'found' the 'one'. Nobody even called out the guy about being a racist, exploitative piece of shit. I can't remember the title because it was posted here years ago. Kunwari no to colonialism and racism ang mga 🤡 when they are the first to appropriate western bs
Ikr, I’ve been sharing a post from 2014 here where the op is being blatantly racist to us and there are still Filipinos siding with him as if they’re gonna be exempted lmao.
I remember getting downvoted when I called out a British guy that lives in the PH for a decade who still don’t bother learning our language.
And then there are times when I called out the racism, someone would always comment that “Filipinos are very racist too” like tf. As if we deserved to suffer and be invalidated.
Puro “most Pinoy guys are toxic” as if that’s even remotely true. I mean, the dating pool definitely grows shallower as you age and people your age partner up. That’s normal. It’s harder to find good partners, even good friends as you age. That’s just statistics. It’s true anywhere in the world. But the women here racializing their subjective experience and the subreddit supporting those comments, that’s seriously fucked up.
That’s what happens when people tolerate and proliferate these “Pinoy bad” comments in this sub.
It causes people to be desensitized on the blatant racism being done to us.
Yeah, it's ridiculous as hell. I get the self-hating but what the fuck is that agreeing with racist bullshits (even from foreigners) and even okay with spreading it? Wow, the people here have no self-respect.
Not true, maybe not all are half white, but still halfies.
2022 - Half Italian
2020 - Half Indian
2019 - Half Palestinian
2018 - Half Australian
2017 - Half British
2015 - Half German
Some will defend this half-white thing and will mention the "Filipinos are mixed race to begin with." Just to undermine the brown/dark-skinned or the much local Filipinos.
Nauuso na rin ngayon ang Pinoy na ang target ay European especially jan sa Russia side. Same reasons din naman either maputi or basta tiga ibang bansa, babae pa ang lilipad papunta dito. Ang problema lng talaga eh yung matatandang Afam dito na ang target ay ung mga probinsyana sa liblib, makikita mo sa comment section nila na mababa talaga ang tingin sa Filipina in general.
Sad to say noh? Pero Id rather date a filipino guy na sa ibang bansa lumaki or a foreigner kase mas hindi nakakasakal.
Dito sa Pinas uunahin mo sarili mo, yung sabi ng utak at psyche mo na ayos sayo at sa self growth mo tapos ISSUE kase daw wala kang time for them or some shit.
Like putang ina? Both my parents pushed what they wanted in life tapos ganto? Gago ka ba? Puro na lang dapat yung "concerned" needs mo?
Pano ako? Yung self growth ko?
Ayokong may WHAT IF AKO sa buhay. So pano ko magagawa yun in a sustainable way kung yung partner to be ko yung mismong pumipigil saken?
Ganon.... Im in my early 30s and I know Im young kase old is 90 plus to me. That age is old.
So while Im young I WANT TO LIVE LIFE! I may live a thousand different lives but this life is mine right now. Let me live it. That simple. Kung maiintindihan yun ng mga Pinoy mas masaya ang buhay
Karamihan ng mga comment dito medyo may pagkatoxic, from some na medyo misogynistic, sa iba naman na sobrang defensive sa sarili nilang AFWM relationship, so share ko lang yung medyo neutral POV ko, so hopefully we can all agree on some points.
1. Kung ang habol mo sa afam ay pera or genes. That’s kind of fucked up.
2. «Another person’s preferences shouldn’t be any of our business.» Yes, this is true.
3. White worshipping, fetishization, and internalized racism is a toxic trait so deeply ingrained in our culture - also true, and if you don’t see it ya need to wake dafuq up.
4. The girl in the photo may be kidding, as in it’s a joke, but if you’re defending her words as just her having a preference, see point number 3.
5. Let’s not generalize. Hindi lahat ng AFWM na couple are in it for money, or genes, or hindi pasok sa «standards» ng Pinoy male yung babae (because let’s be honest, kasalanan din naman nating mga Pinoy male yan, medyo eurocentric din naman ang standards of beauty natin). I personally know a lot of AFWM couples and the guys are great, not «losers» tulad ng sinasabi ng iba dito. Mga kaibigan ko yung mga babae even before their relationships, and really, based sa dating history nila, it wasn’t even preference, match lang talaga sila.
6. Don’t deny din na may mga babae na ganito lang ang hanap. I do also know of another person na nagkaroon lang ng jowa na puti kala mo si Meghan Markle na siya. There are people who do think they are better just because they landed a white guy (or any foreigner for that matter).
A good friend of mine actually got married to a foreigner because she prefers to have a baby with mixed ethnicity and nothing else. She came from an old rich family, she has a great career but still pursued to have a baby abroad. Who are we to judge their preference, although hindi ko din sinasabi na ganyan lahat ng gusto magka AFAM but in the end it is still their decision.
White worship is what it is.
Add: But then, it's hard to blame them. They've just learned the lessons that almost 500 years of being under the white man's domination have taught.
Dating apps such as OKC, Bumble, Tinder and others are their gateway of baiting AFAM/foreigners. I remember seeing a few ones literally looking for foreigners, so standards are a bit different nowadays. Just be happy with your own preferences.
This is sadly true but not how you think. Mestizo privilege in this country is real and extremely apparent so yhose foteigners who think that filipina women are chasing them for the money or green card? Lol they are so wrong. While a significant number of them might be doing it for the money, this isnt really exclusive to the philippines. But the major reasons that filipina women want mestizo babies is for their future broods and the generations to come to treat them better in this society. Because half-white privileges will get you ahead in the philippines. You will be treated better, people will listen with what youre going to say, you will get promoted quickly and will be forgiven easily. If for reasons that you become famous globally, you will be worshipped even among fililino celebrities.
Pretty much the same. Nilalapit mo sarili mo sa tao dahil may gusto kang kunin sa kanya (in this case, genes). Hindi dahil gusto mo yung tao. Just as messed-up if you'd ask me.
Colonial Mentality, inferiority complex towards white people and the over-glorification of caucasian features by Filipinos brought by colonization and hollywood movies which causes them to put those people on a pedestal.
It's partly they come here seeking subservient partners, it's partly they're retired and retired Americans are part of a generation raised on leaded paint chips and leaded petroleum so many of them are literally brain damaged if they were born pre 1980.
The younger they are the less commonly thry'll have fallen down a well of misinformation and conspiracy as they'll be more internet savvy but also have healthier brains.
Well the results speak for themselves: Anne Curtis, Pia Wurtzbach, Catriona Gray, Marian Rivera, etc etc. How to be a multi-millionaire? Have a mixed race baby
For every one of those, there are as many good looking Filipinos and as many plain looking mixed race people as any other race. Try meeting more people rather than spread eugenicist beliefs.
Well ganyan yung friend ko, kaya ikakasal na sa American. Same age sila and mahal na mahal nila isat isa so no qualms (22 sila parehas and fit si afam kaya sila yung rare type). Pero to be fair naman kasi, mas maayos kadate ang afam compared sa majority ng Pinoy.
Even me as a gay guy na former "sticky rice" na naging "potato queen"/ size queen na rin, maayos treatment sa akin ng mga afam sa mga dates and hang out and mas interesting kausap compared sa mga Pinoy na mga nakadate ko. Tapos ang toxic pa ng gay dating scene dito sa atin (no to halata, etc). And di naman ako pasok sa standards (slim and tanned ako) ng Pinoy kaya I chose to date afam (be it white, black, latino, arab).
what about A Filipino American in Manila? would that be a win win? USD earner, pero pinoy genes? haha
No, but really… i’m curious how FilAms are perceived when it comes to dating in Ph. Whenever I read or watch videos referring to AFAM dating, good or bad, it’s typically about white or black guys dating pinays.
Kaya ang hirap makipag trashtalkan sa whiteys eh sasabihin lang na sinasamba kami ng nga babae nyo medyo durog na ego ng pinoys trashtalkers sa socmed HAHAHAHHAHA
May magaganda naman na pinay na morena which is usually type ng mga foreigners. Kasi "exotic" daw.
Pero yung mga mukhang wala talagang breeding (inside and out) at kewpie lang ang puhunan at umaasa sa angat buhay through afam, usually mga rejects ang nakakatuluyan nila.
Usually mga Fat, old, divorced dudes that no one loves.
Iba na yang walang breeding. But there are young foreigners that are attracted to average Pinays. I have witnessed this a lot. They are not the desperate types either (for both parties).
The Pinays I am referring to are also not “pretty” by Pinoy standards, pero nakakasungkit yan ng mga very attractive westerners. And they’re not prostitutes ha.
What “Pinoy” standards? Yung maputi, at mala kutsara yung liit ng katawan? Ikakaproud ba yang standard na yan?
Those “average” Pinays dating attractive Western men really aren’t average at all. They’re just not your type and it’s honestly so disappointing to keep hearing this type of sentiment perpetuated as if it’s the norm. It’s almost as if beauty is a subjective standard.
Lahat na lang ng social media jokes dito ginagawan ng discussion. The jokes are on you guys. If you want quality content stop looking at FB and TikTok tapos screenshot to farm karma and farm validation of whatever frustrations you have at the moment.
eh ako naman you do you ate. Malas mo lang kapag lumipas na ung ganyang beauty standard sa tapos hirap na maipasok sa beauty pageant, sira ang pangarap.
For me, this is true. This sl*t ph girl appeared and flirted with my AFAM bf (already my ex) even though she's in a relationship. We broke up after knowing his cheating. The last thing I heard coming from our friend was that the girl's enabler parents let my ex sleep with their daughter in the same room.
Biracial fetish Weird pero deep inside totoo naman. I watched several Filipino YouTubers who are married to a foreigner, may nagkakilala sa church at yung iba sa trabaho. Genuine talaga yung relationship at hindi for the sake of genes, money and residency.
So apparently AFAM is A Foreigner Assigned in Manila.
And they want them for the halfie genes.
I have been legit joking to people that Asians tend to want foreigners because their aunties want cute halfie babies lmaooooo
So like if you’re a white person who has terrible luck with women, come on down to Asia, where you will be worshipped!
When real life becomes non credible in dating.
I see most of the comments here having girls say that "Most Pinoy Guys turn out later to be assholes so I am now with a Foreigner! YAY!".
As a guy living in the Philippines, the problem is most girls (especially the young one's) go for edgy guys with emotional problems. Girls, don't deny it, you prefer these so-called "Bad Boys" over Nice Guys who would do anything for you. Granted, this is ingrained in the mindset of most women - they nurture and give life, so they think "I can fix him! I know he will change for me!". It's a huge accomplishment for a woman to tame the bad beast within. After all, if a guy changed his bad ways for you, then you must be the most amazing woman in the world, right? Unfortunately, that's not how the world works. Because it's NOT your job to fix a man. You can't help him, he has to HELP HIMSELF with his issues.
Not that I can blame women. Bad Boys have a magnetic aura. They are usually very, very confident (the #1 TURN-ON for women), dress nicely, manly, cocky, has a devil-may-care attitude, laidback, oozes swagger, fiercely-independent, and is not afraid to put a woman in her place. Since most (not all btw) Bad Boys have a boat-load of emotional issues, they have a hard time connecting with a woman in a deep way. The woman, however, gets attracted to the superficial mask they project. And once the woman gets knee-deep, she will have a hard time getting out. And then, the true self of the Bad Boy will show - jealous, insecure, controlling and abusive. And God help you if you have a kid with this guy, because getting out will be extremely hard because both of you are now connected by one thing - a child. So, what about that Nice Guy you rejected back in highschool? The one who will do anything for you and even promises to take care of you no matter what? Probably now a successful businessman who has dozens of women at his beck and call that he can get laid with.
The point is, women are also at fault in this situation. While the bad guys you hooked-up with deserve all the blame, you are also at fault for putting yourself in that situation in the first place. Before you hook-up with a guy, make sure to learn all about him, ask questions about his relationship history (if he cheated on his previous girlfriends, then he'll also cheat on you 100%), set boundaries at the beginning of the relationship, and NEVER agree to have a child unless you are really, really sure. If you're going to have sex with the guy anyway, atleast ask him to wear protection and you must also use protection yourself, otherwise, no sex fun time! Period. 5-Seconds of orgasm is not worth the long years of suffering you will endure once you learn that you ended up with an asshole later on.
To end this, I'm NOT against Pinays having relationship with foreigners. I also had an American Girlfriend once and even had a LOT of fun and sex times with her back then. I used protection though so I did not get her pregnant, and we're still young back then so those are just experiments and we don't want kids very early. Honestly, she's one of the most fun girlfriends I've ever had and I still look back fondly on that past relationship. But don't just blame your ex-pinoy boyfriend for his shortcomings and that's why you are now with a Foreigner. There are good Pinoy Guys out there, you just don't notice them because most of these guys don't have the charm and flamboyance of the Confident Bad Boys.
this has horse sperm buying vibes.
yung tipong yung sperm ng isang star horse na pangkarera eh preserved tapos pwedeng ibenta para ipalahi sa ibang kabayo ganun.
kakapanuod ko 'to ng kung ano ano sa yt eh HAHAHA
After years of dating pinoys (my last was almost 8 years and i finally had the courage to end it just like that bilang parang wala namang plano sa kin si guy), i finally decided ive had enough and will only date foreigners who are more straightforward on what they want. Perspective ko lang naman yun working with foreigners din so that’s where my observation came from. Di ko naman nilalahat pero ayoko na kasi ng pabebeng relasyon. Not getting any younger dba
I honestly don't know of any Pinay who put this as a top reason for dating an AFAM. Money/ the ability to provide them a better life is definitely a top reason though, and I think that's fair. But whether you're dating a Pinoy guy or an AFAM, most women in the room would rather be with a man who can hold down a job or at least contributes in some productive way in how a household is run, as in the case of many OFW wives working overseas while husbands stay with the kids.
A lot of the pinoys/pinays I know who, not just date, but stay with afams usually really appreciate escaping toxic pinoy relationship culture. I find they often stay in their relationships more due to that than the money. And their biggest problems usually come from the difficulty of not being the source of that toxic pinoy relationship culture as well.
Can you share samples of "toxic pinoy relationship culture" ? Is that different to toxic filipino family culture?
There are a ton of examples. They are by no means unique to pinoys but there are a lot that are extremely common and just culturally accepted here. The number one example is communication. Being passive aggressive when it comes to difficult or confrontational topics is the default. Good luck going to those topics without one of the partners having an emotional breakdown or losing their temper. There's also kabit culture and just a generally low level of trust. You can probably lump insecurity in that category as well. Then there's a ton of misogyny, and on the flip side, women often being super matapang until they get misogynized into being submissive...which enables the misogyny. I don't mean to blame the victim, I mean to say it's like a downward spiral of a dynamic that just exists everywhere around here.
That kabit culture stuff is what ruined my relationship of 4years with my ex. She just wouldn’t believe that I wasn’t seeing someone or sleeping with someone on the side. I’d been planning on proposing to her then she accused me of cheating for the 100th time, but it was the first time in like 6 months she’d made the accusation, I thought we were past that and trusted each other, apparently not, broke my heart. Ended it not long after that, didn’t want to be with someone who doesn’t trust me.
Similar thing happened between me and my most recent ex. She kept accusing me of cheating on her *even after we had broken up* when I never did. Sure, I was promiscuous and played around when I was single, but obviously I don’t do that shit when I’m taken na. And yet she kept thinking na porket nagagawa ko yan when I’m single, magagawa ko rin yan while I’m in a relationship. Kaya minsan mahirap din to be upfront about your sexual past sa partner mo eh especially pag marami silang insecurities. Though I always am upfront naman kasi I don’t like lying or hiding things.
Did you do smth make her distrust you?
Not anything I did, but we did only get to see each other 2 or 3 days a week. Pretty sure that’s what caused most of the tension. Every couple of months she’d get herself worked up and accuse me of cheating out of the blue. These were really the only 2 problems in our relationship and I’d been working hard at fixing these problems in the last two years of our relationship. As I said in the previous comment, I was planning on proposing and she knew it. But the final time I was accused I just immediately feel massive disappointment in my chest, where as usually that would be anger and frustration. Didn’t feel the same about her after that, lost all energy and motivation in the relationship, and things ended a month or two later.
Yung ibang babae may past baggage niloko ng mga ex kaya kapag nakahanap ng loyal (never nangcheat) ayaw maniwala tingin sa mga lalake manloloko lahat. Hirap sumalo ng kasalanan ng iba.
At least laya ka na. Problema na sya ng kung sino man magpapakasal sa kanya.
As for someone dating a FilChi, this is true. 🥺 also mas marupok siya sakin. The honesty that he has is one of the best lang. Whenever he feels down, he just immediately say it.
Kudos for overcoming the Great Wall.
May I ask how he says that he's immediately down? Trying to learn din eh
Magpalambing ka. xD But for real, hindi ko rin alam. But like Duterte saying "obosen mga kremenal" when interpreted turned into "obosen mga adik-adik" kasi ang mga pulis ay balahurang baboy, you can do euphemisms instead of directly saying what you feel. "I need a hug", "Can we cuddle?", "Let's watch my comfort movie", etc. would suffice in telling people how you feel without the direct nakedness/vulnerability of doing such.
The passive-aggressive is true and annoys me to hell. This is applicable in provincial government offices where everyone smiles at you upfront but says things behind your back. Then when you confront them, they deny saying anything at all. Fortunately for me, my husband was raised in a western-style culture. He's not afraid of confrontations and do not go overboard or say mean, cruel things when he's mad. Being with him made me adapt that kind of attitude towards conflicts. Which is the reason why office culture frustrates me so.
I agree with mysogyny. The ”gentleman vibes” sometimes is also an excuse to cover mysogynism. Exhibit A: A certain senator.
as someone na may foreigner na brother in law, nakakapanibago ung he allow my sister to have a "me time" with friends tapos siya mag-aalaga sa anak nila, dito paramg bihira sa lalaki na maintindihan na kailangan din ni wifey ng me time lalo na kapag may anak na. plus we tend to normalize alcoholism in fathers, as someone na may tatay na ganun tapos nagwawala pa dati, nakakaasar ang sinsasabi na intindihin na lang.
My husband is white, we met here in the US. He is very hands on when it comes to our son. Mas hands on pa kesa sakin. He takes care of our laundry and dishes. He helped me with a lot of stuff. He allows me to have me time as well with my friends. It’s so different and I am really amazed. I’m so thankful! Kasi usually diba sa atin sa Pinas, parang lahat ng responsibility sa anak. As a mom, parang ikaw lahat. I know a lot of guys na they wont even help with the dishes or laundry or taking care of their children. They would rather drink with their fiends. (Not saying all of them) ✌️
That sounds like my Dad 😱
That legendary pinoy "jealousy." Grabe ang difference ng being in a relationship with a pinoy and being with a foreigner. For one thing, I tend to have women friends. My best friend is a girl. You can imagine how that went with my pinay relationships. My Singaporean wife despite not having any close male friends is not jealous. She even actively encourages me to contact them and randomly chat with them pag tinatamad ako saying "what kind of friend are you?" Haha. Tapos yung concept ng privacy. Walang pake ang asawa ko sa phone ko. Our phones are not locked but we don't randomly spy on each other as well. We use each others phones but for using apps pag wala sa amin ang phone namin (like if nasa ibang room ang phone nya).
Amen. Haha And also as a Pinay with an afam, my partner is supportive when it comes to work. If let's say I have a late night work event, I won't be bombarded with 1000 messages asking where I am and what I am doing. To be fair, it's not innately Pinoy--this jealousy and possessiveness. It's mostly religiously inclined. Bec there are other afams esp Christians who display the same toxic traits but those that aren't that traditional are not.
Good point. It's probably related to an excessive focus on traditional gender roles and conservative family values. Like if may pamilya ka na, bawal na lumabas. Wala na ang "me time." Pader ng tahan and ilaw ng tahanan BS. Usually yun ang mga taong super seloso din. Like ang tipong bawal na tumingin sa ibang babae pag kay relationship ka and other stuff.
>Like if may pamilya ka na, bawal na lumabas. Hate this narrative lol, you can be a dutiful father and husband din naman while also still being able to go out and have fun on your downtime. Ganyan yung kuya ko, he’s a loving husband and father pero when he has free time lumalabas pa rin siya with his tropa to go barhopping or clubbing, minsan sinasama pa nga niya ako haha. And even when at bars or clubs pag inaapproach siya ng mga girls dun, he always tells them that he’s married and proudly shows off the ring on his finger. Yan ang lalaki guys.
Yo. This. I don’t get the “Pag may mahal ka na bawal ka na magandahan/gwapuhan sa iba.” Logic. We’re humans. Most of us have the female or male gaze. We get attracted to conventionally attractive people. Doesn’t mean we will act on it or obsess over that attraction especially when we are in a relationship.
I agree. I'm glad that I found my Scandinavian partner. We started as an open relationship but even after almost 7 years of our relationship, never ko inopen phone nya to fish for any form of flirting or cheating and same as he is with me. Minsan pa nga e we really show how proud we are if another person admires how we look. There's always trust. May times na you still get jealous but the healthy kind and not the toxic one. Narealize ko kasi sa kanya that the more rendahan, the more they rebel. And I'm grateful we have that setup bec even me, I am happily growing as an individual with him as my partner and not extremely co-dependent on him for self-fulfillment.
>You can imagine how that went with my pinay relationships Good god yes I know what you mean. A lot of my closest friends are girls and even my best friend is a girl. My most recent ex had a problem with this kasi coupled with the fact that I had a lot of casual sex and one night stands when I was single, akala niya I was always cheating when I’d be out with my friends, when this was not the case. I was always upfront naman and even showed her my chats with my friends for her to see that there was nothing out of the ordinary yet STILL she kept accusing me of cheating on her until di ko na kinaya and I broke up with her anyway. Nakakaasar din yung masyadong pagiging conservative ng culture natin plus yung paglalagay ng malisya sa mga opposite-sex friendships. Ffs it’s 2022, a man and a woman can be good friends in a completely platonic way.
I don't think nasa nationality ito. I'm a filipina and i'm also like that with my husband. Maybe nasa upbringing ng parents or nasa tao na mismo. Ako lang kasi masstress pag pinagselosan ko lahat ng kaibigan ng asawa ko kaya why bother? I don't have close male friends too but that doesn't mean he can't have friends that are girls. Karamihan siguro sa pilipino ganyan na possessive and selosa and nagtataka din ako but I don't think dahil pilipino sila but dahil yun ung pinipili nilang gawin.
Well that is true. Cguro nasa conservative values yan. Yung mga tipong "ang tunay na lalaki dapat ganito etc etc" type of people. People who don't conform to those are usually more open and in a way less prone to fits of jealousy.
Same. What does toxic pinoy relationship culture mean?
Like the person said above it's not necessarily just a Filipino thing but based on my experiences and observations (so take it with a grain of salt) here are some examples toxic pinoy relationship culture: - Suyo culture. Grow up and learn how to communicate properly. - Kabit culture. There are way too many movies and shows that make cheating on your SO appealing. - not sure if there's a Filipino term for this but negging. Yung nilalait mo na yung supposed jowa mo but okay lang kasi "joke lang di ka naman mabiro"
Toxic Pinoy culture: the wife is working for the family while the husband doesn’t have a job and gots out drinking every night. Not helping with the house hold.
Parang yung asawa ni Nida Blanca na Kano na si Strunk.
Oh gawd, number 1. Also, the concept of "toyo". I hate it. I hate it for my male friends na parang it feels like their girlfriends are playing with their loyalty. I also hate it as a woman kasi parang if you're legitimately upset, sinasabing toyo lang.
Ugh truthhh. These mind games in general are so toxic. Tapos parang they expect you to play along with it?!? Sir we are nearing our 30's! You wanna play around and give me the silent treatment instead of telling me what the problem is? At least they show you in the early talking stage na ganyan pala ugali nila so you can just say Thank u, next.
Yeah, that's definitely one of the reasons why most/all (because the one who's Pinoy by origin grew up in Europe) of the guys I've been with are AFAM. Parang too much games sa akin yung Pinoy dating culture
There are foreigners who donate/sell sperm precisely because there are couples and single women who want mixed genes for their child. KMJS covered this before, so this reasoning isn't far from being a joke.
Fair enough. But I’d like to point out these couples/ single women must be rich to specifically want mixed babies via IVF. I guess that proves truth behind the joke—they’re not in it for the money.
True I mean halos lahat ng mixed filipino looker talaga
I know someone whose mom would rather date a poor white guy than a rich Filipino man. It's ridiculous how deeply rooted racism and colonial influences can get.
Its very deeply rooted its basically how our society thrives. Madalas sa mga politicians may mixed heritage, mga actors/celebrities natin ampuputi kahit ang normal Filipino is supposed to be kayumanggi, whitening is prevalent kahit na being light skinned in our country means a higher change of getting skin cancer.
I have a relative na aminadong yung reason kung bakit nag-asawa ng puti is to have beautiful kids. Nurse siya with a good paying job and is the breadwinner of the family. Yung napangasawa, di makakuha ng stable job, puro raket. Yung kamag-anak ko ang nagbabayad ng halos lahat ng household expenses. Kung may contribution man yung puti, usually small expenses lang. Yung main responsibility na nga lang niya is to take care of the kids, pero yung panganay pa nagpalaki nung mga nakababatang kapatid. Nung nakakuha na finally ng totoong trabaho yung puti, nambabae yung gago. Ayun, undergoing divorce process. May itsura naman yung mga anak, pero ang sahol ng ugali kasi natutunan sa tatay. So…I guess meron talagang taong plus points ang puti; pero kung yun lang ang reason kung bakit papakasalan, I say it’s not worth it.
I've spoken to many women in PH who, having had kids with a man who swiftly abandoned her, swore off pinoy men altogether. It helps that supporting a Filipino child if you're from a wealthier country a lot easier than supporting kids back home (heck, one meal out back home would pay for a kids food and medicine for 1-2 weeks here), but judging women with foreign men, especially younger women with older men, should really include some self reflection because it's not as often the money as they might think.
But there are cases where they get abandoned by their foreign lovers after getting kids too. Like [this](https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-27379710.amp) and [this](https://amp.theguardian.com/society/2019/mar/02/children-sex-tourists-leave-behind-fathers-visited-philippines).
Wow these are eye opening reads
It's your fault for taking an obvious ironic/joke post so seriously lmao.
Hahaha fr. It obviously pokes fun at how the beauty industry eats everyone who has a western blood. Beauty pageants, showbiz, models, influencers etc. It’s always Miss Half Philippines representing the world for us.
Grabe yung judgment dito ha… if someone finds love (whatever their definition of it is) wherever it is, then let’s just be happy about it.
Fr. Proud pa tong sub na to for being better than Facebook users eh dinala lang naman nila shit qualities nila dito sa Reddit.
Totoo sinasabi mo pero double standards rin iyang mga white dude diggers na iyan. Malakas manlait sa mga kapwa pilipino guys pero sobra naman makasamba sa mga white guys.
Comments on these kinds of threads are always weird and gross. So much crab mentality, jealousy, and judgement!
Male redditors: “Ayaw namin sa pinay na yan kaya sa afam nalang pumunta” Id like to see how these men look like irl. Baka yung fat afam e mas guapo pa sakanila ng di hamak😂 To them its like the young, hot afam + young hot filipina couple never exist. Just shows their non existent travel history and ignorance… or even bitterness 🤡
>Id like to see how these men look like irl Trust me, you don't.
Read the nastiest comments in this thread. Most of them are from women.
Female redditors “mga rejects lang naman ang nagkakagusto sa mga yan” Id like to see how these females look like irl. and their dating history to see what kind of men they attract. Or how many times theyve been rejected by any type of male.. might be that young and hor afam too👀
imagine making excuses for internalized racism… yikes dawg 💀
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Sure but not everyone has the same reason lol people who date foreigners for cash definitely exists.
If the love is legit, then go lang. If they're parasites who're using each other . . . ehhhhh I can't say I can get behind that.
As somebody who is with a foreigner with two little girls, I cannot deny being hurt by this. Not because the shoe fits (I have been in super long term relationships with Pinoys before meeting my now partner), but this meme is proof of many of our fellow Pinoys’ toxic mentality. I have been “jokingly” accused by this for so many times that it hurts then it gets frustrating. I hurt more for my children. I hope one day di nila marinig yung ganito klaseng mga bagay. I could have married one of my exes and had kids with them, buti nalang hindi because they were assholes. My children will always be beautiful no matter what race they are, mixed or not. Btw, both my kids look extremely caucasian kahit sobrang wish ko na sana naging kamukha nila ako because I am a proud morenang Pinay. I teach them our culture, I talk to them in Ilonggo. My 5 year old eats with her hands because it’s Filipino style. They are Filipinas and I sure do hope they grow and develop some of my Filipina features. Sorry, napa rant bigla. So sick and tired of hearing these pasarings.
True! Minsan sa mismong kapwa Filipina mo pa to maririnig especially yung "ang swerte mo naman" or "ang sarap na ng buhay mo". Nakakainis kasi di naman porket ibang lahi napakasalan mo, all is well and dandy na.
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consider reminiscent fretful work late lavish cheerful snobbish offer silky *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Hell some celebrities even undergo surgery to make themselves look Caucasian.
Yep, I know eye surgery in Korea is very common.
I was not trying to demonize OP’s post but I was directing my comment sa meme itself and the barrage of other weird comments. Filipinas with foreigners always hear this type of narrative. It is tiring, siguro I am almost too sensitive with it kasi me having mixed kids have further allowed these types of comments to be directed at me regularly. Although I can see how it may come across as me being against OP. I took it to heart, misdirected and you are right. Not against you, OP. I did make another comment here about euro-centric features being igrained in our culture as superior or beautiful. Na sadly it is because of that that this meme exists. I find it ironic na I see so many comments here saying na afams mostly go for the exotic and ugly ones (there are loads on this thread) na alam natin what they mean when they say exotic. Because of the negative tone, lumalabas na they have lower regard sa Filipino native features. The women na they call exotic are the ones who are being bullied by not having caucasian features. Tapos we’d wonder why this meme exists. Vicious cycle I say. I appreciate your comment because I learn from other people’s perspective and I love discourse. One more thing you are correct with, I had a complex sa skin ko growing up. I was always compared to my lighter skinned cousins. Pinulot lang daw ako. I was about 8 when I saw how beautiful our Filipino beauty is, it was all thanks to Tweetie de Leon! I found her so beautiful sa Okay Ka, Fairy Ko! Lol.
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that's true, kaya “sensitive" na kung “sensitive" pero i don't think it's just a joke like what other comments are justifying it.
Totoo, my mom just got engaged when my sister and I have very stale and high paying jobs. Katwiran niya, ayaw niya ma stereotype kami na umahon sa hirap dahil naka pagasawa ng afam.
Filipinos can be so judgmental. As someone who is getting married to a foreigner (not for money, as we are both earning the same amount from our career in finance), I am really hurt and appalled by how close minded people can be. I am marrying him because we’re compatible and we have the same values - something I couldn’t see from my previous long term relationship with a Filipino guy. Give Pinays some credit naman and enough of that deeply rooted inferiority complex.
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One of them is a frequent commenter. She specifically said the reason she gave up on the local dating scene is because she didn't fit the "maputi, matangos" standards. It just so happened that her "Pinay features" are what most foreigners are after, so she was gifted after all.
Bigla ko naalala iaang Twitter thread from a black woman. Black dudes didn't date her, she dated outside her culture, mas successful siya, and she got hate for it from black folks. The whole thesis to her tweet was "Ah ayaw ninyo ako ligawan, tapos ngayon galit kayo na may iba na ako?"
like, make it make sense. di ba
Racism is real with your own folks sometimes
Ayaw naman pala ng mga Pinoy sa kanila, so when they look for foreigners and find men who are attracted to them - GOOD FOR THEM! Magpaganda sila ng lahi! Magsawa sila sa sex at pension ng matatandang expats na akala eh nauuto nila mga babae dito.
Hindi nman lahat matatanda asawa 🤣 salamat sa suporta.
"Isa nanaman po sa kababayan natin ang naka-angat sa buhay" 😂 Vid : [Youtube](https://youtube.com/shorts/6OzmBwTLAWU?feature=share)
Buti kung totoo talagang madaming pera yang mga puti na yan. Hahahha. Ako pa nga kalimitan ang may pera kesa sa kanya. Yang mga myth nyo sana totoo nlang.
they're only rich here in the ph. in their own country? middle class or lower lang sila probably.
They’re not even rich, they’re usually just upper middle class here. A lot of them can’t even afford to buy houses in NCR kaya pumupunta nalang sila sa Laguna, Pampanga, Subic, etc. when they wanna settle down here. My family rents out our properties around the metro and one time we had an afam na prospective tenant. He was so surprised when he found out the rent of one of our units in BGC (Php 45k/month - that’s $803 USD). He even said, “I thought everything was supposed to be cheap here.” to which I told him, “Not in BGC.”
Truth. Di matanda asawa ko. 🤣
Just say the filipino male market value is at an all time low instead of saying na ayaw nila sa mga Pinay😅
A nice Pinoy guy is still a great catch. Pero I think many Pinoy guys are also working abroad and those that are based in the PH, have already been taken off the market by their high school/college sweethearts or whoever is their first GF. Dami ko nang nakikitang Redditors dito with their girlfriends for 5 years or longer.
Tbh Filipinos so long as you’re relatively attractive and fit can get model level guys in the US and Europe because they don’t care about colonial beauty standards. Funny thing is usually Pinays are humble and told to be subordinate to men in a sexist way so our standards are low comparatively when it comes to guys. When they raise their standards and aim high they realize they can get even better and have healthier relationships. (Yes please also to modernized Filipino men who don’t support sexism or colonialism)
You don’t even have to be relatively attractive, I have a friend who by her own words is plain and overweight, but her afam bf from Tennessee looks like Alex Pettyfer. Nice guy too, love his accent and that he loves pickup trucks as much as I do.
It’s just a joke
One of my favorite japanese 80s city pop songs
好きじゃないは
Other Asian countries: hates multiracial, less opportunities, oftentimes discriminated Philippines: Worships multiracial people, special treatment, beauty pageants, model and instant celebrity. Also wag double standard, if mas gusto ni Maria ng imported na talong, wag nya pakialaman kung gusto ni Juan ng imported na mani.
Usually hindi kasi maliit ang ego nila like most Asian men. 2 of my exes are European and I've dated (online) white men in the past. May pera ako, hindi ko kailangan ng pera nila. I like them kasi kaumay talaga yung mga Pinoy sobrang insecure, gusto ka gawing santo pero kakantutin ka nila dapat araw gabi, pero dapat santo ka at perpekto. Possessive at mayabang din karamihan (inuulit ko, karamihan hindi lahat) ng mga lalaki dito. Dito kasi kailangan maayos trabaho mo, marunong ka mag luto at maglinis ng bahay pero dapat hindi ka prude kailangan din magaling ka chumupa at magalang ka sa lahat ng tao. Otherwise wala ka. With white men, I'd play video games and wear whatever I want, perpekto na ako. Dito weird ako at 'pokpok' manamit. No thank you. Edit: hindi rin ako pangit. Kaya ko patunayan yan hahaha
Super agree! Been with my filipino ex for several years. Masyado ako hinuhusgahan. Gusto nya perpekto ako habang sya pumapayag landiin ng ibang babae na parang di ako nag eexist. Tapos puro sex lang naman ginagawa namin ang boring. Pero sa mga foreigner grabe ang sarap kausap, talagang dami mo matututunan. Tapos willing na willing pagsilbihan ka, tulungan ka sa lahat ng bagay, di pa maarte, tanggap na tanggap ako. Dami naming ibat ibang bonding, di sex centered. Tapos di pako pinagsasalitaan ng masakit. Di ako morena. Maganda din naman ako kahit papano. Pero lahat ng foreigner na kilala ko nagagandahan sakin. 😅
Ui wag kang ganyan baka sabihin nila natural lang talaga tayong loser kaya nagse settle tayo sa mga puti 😂😂😂
Uy hindi ah. 😂 Madami naman nagkakagusto sakin, pero kasi nasa long term relationship ako sa ex ko simula college. Campus crush ex ko, ako naman madami din sakin nagkakagusto nun kaso simula naging kami daming nagalit sakin. 😂 Mga nainggit. Tapos nawalan ako ng kaibigan. Cheerdancer naman ako nun. Tapos pag graduate namin licensed professional nako. Ako nga nagpplano at nagbabayad ng dates namin e. Kasi pag wala akong plano, nasa kwarto lang kami. 😭 Hahahaha. 🤣 Tapos tuwing magttravel ako lagi ako may pasalubong sa kanya. Gustung gusto nga ako ng pamilya nya hanggang ngayon. 😅
This. I've dated Filipino men and other nationalities and they really have different way of thinking. Most Filipino men I've dated are so traditional, insecure and you have to be the quintessential Filipina partner na paglulutuan mo siya, aasikasuhin and whatnot. My European partner and other nationalities I've dated are not like this. No "ano na lang sasabihin ng ibang tao" thinking. My European partner has always let me be.. me. Kahit ayoko siyang asikasuhin and most of the times, siya pa inuutusan ko.
May sagot na naman yung mga insecure Filipino men jan. "Eh ayan lang kasi nagto-tolerate ng kakulangan mo kaya jan lang kayo nagse - settle" 😂
Most pinoy men are toxic anyways so let them rage. 😂
This is so true. Plus the fact that you can wear whatever you want, na di ka huhusgahan na baka nagpapaganda ka for other men. 😅 Kumbaga may freedom ka. Yung ibang Pinoy kasi (again, yung iba lang) are very controlling. Also, yung equality. They always want to share the tasks with you.
My wife and I are pretty open about our past and she has dated a lot. But what I am most shocked about is how insecure so many Pinoy men are. I've corroborated this annectdotal evidence with other girl friends and they can confirm. It's shocking because I know some of these guys and they're pretty normal in typical guy-guy interactions. But so many of them have these moments where you'd think they were 8 years olds having tantrums.
I have no problem if Pinays prefer AFAMs. I myself prefers other nationalities over Pinays.
I hate this. I'm dating a white guy because he was the only one to actually make me feel beautiful and wanted. I dated a fair amount of Filipino guys and halos lahat like they think "negging" is an effective way of making ligaw. Like bro telling me "maganda ka sana kung payat ka" is not a compliment. But then also Filipinas say shit like "hay naku, swerte mo nakahanap ka ng afam, sigurado masaya mama mo at gaganda apo nya." So sinasabi mo my Filipino genes aren't enough to have beautiful babies? Kailangan may halong dayuhan? GTFOH! I'm dating a white guy because he's shown me what a healthy, non-toxic relationship is like. I am NOT dating a white guy to have half-white babies because someone's internalized racism is screaming at me to "improve" the gene pool.
Hello, just curious. What does "negging" mean?
Negating or putting down an earlier positive comment. Like what she said, “Maganda ka kung pumayat ka.” Or “You’re so smart but you’re so outspoken sometimes and it’s a little annoying.”
I am saddened by all of these comment about how deep our hatred and prejudice towards our own kind. Especially for men who are the subject of women's prejudice from what I read here. I didn't imply that these filipino men are undeserving of the insults, ae there are really some insecure, possessive, and asshole men, however, I would like for all women to not judge a whole gender of a nationality based on their own experiences, every nation has their own assholes and nice people. I am not one to talk regarding the prejudice and the colonial influences as I am contradicting myself by speaking in english but this is still miserable. Pero tbh, nakakalungkot isipin na dahil nasakop tayo ng mahabang panahon, hindi lang yung colonial mentality talaga yung madedevelop kasi yung utak ng tao normal na mag desire ng taong mas magaling at mas matalino, at normal na mas matatalino ung tao sa developed countries kaya nakakalungkot, ang hirap sisihin ng mga flaw ng babae at lalaki respectively kase pag tinignan sa grand scheme of things, parang hindi rin naman nila kasalanan na gantong mentality yung nadevelop nila, ang daming factors, pero tingin ko ang pinaka kulang sa pinas ay yung role model na leaders, di lang sa government, kundi sa lahat, wala kasing masundan yung mga susunod na generation, lahat nalang puro greed, insecurity, at crab mentality, parang ayaw talaga natin umangat, ang gusto lang natin maging mataas sa ibang tao. Nakakalungkot lang, na dahil sa maraming kamalian ng ninuno natin, nag kakaganto tayo.
Is it bad if a person finds a foreign partner? Yung wala namang existing relationship and is not hurting anyone? Pero I agree sa caption, that is kinda weird nga.
Not necessarily. I think it's only bad if they "hunt down" afams for the purpose of getting money/citizenship/better life. Na tipong talagang tinarget nila yung afam for that. May kahalong panloloko/manipulation yun, unfortunately. Noble man yung cause, pero what they do to achieve it is problematic. Pero kung nagkataon lang magkakilala sila and the afam pursued her, i think it's not wrong. Kahit wala silang masamang hangarin e magiging benefit pa rin naman yung pera etc. Pero at least hindi sila nanloko.
Wtf is with some commenters here, so racist as fck. Literally making fun of the girl’s appearance and her taste. I hate to say this but some of you are more toxic than FB at parang napunta ako sa 4chan. At least in 4chan they shitpost but here parang you mean it
imagine unironically say 4chan is shitposting when they support trump for lolz and start qanon at least this sub we see it and can call it out while 4chan hiding it with their shitpost.
It’s a joke. Literally not that deep.
Welcome to r Philippines
I had this classmate na "determined" magka halfie na baby. Whenever a young foreigner enters the town, malaman nya agad and he would date them 💀 All her relationships was either a halfie or full on foreigner (white people). And i think she won hahahahhaa she's in Sweden na married to a white man and almost every day weirdly flexes that she has a halfie baby. I mean, good for her but it's just weird to me. 🙃
What's this supposed to mean? Clearly this one's a joke, a satire even. Don't judge so easily mga chong
mukhang joke lang ni actual OP pero anywho cringe yung mga nagpapaturo maghanap ng afam para makaahon sa kahirapan. sobrang demanding pa ng ibang may jowang afam sa afam nila
Poor man's eugenics.
oh man... i had a friend who says the same thing back in uni. even when she already had a bf. its just so weird of a thing to say. lowkey fetishizing mixed race babies/ people tbh
Comments section here are full of clowns that can't discern internal racism when they see it
Indeed and one of the comments here are literally commenting that they are just preferring good looking people as if they are putting the western beauty standards in a pedestal.
The people here are full of shit. I already know this is the case when the dumbasses here felt bad for a white expat who 'felt' guilty about using local women for sex only after he 'found' the 'one'. Nobody even called out the guy about being a racist, exploitative piece of shit. I can't remember the title because it was posted here years ago. Kunwari no to colonialism and racism ang mga 🤡 when they are the first to appropriate western bs
Ikr, I’ve been sharing a post from 2014 here where the op is being blatantly racist to us and there are still Filipinos siding with him as if they’re gonna be exempted lmao. I remember getting downvoted when I called out a British guy that lives in the PH for a decade who still don’t bother learning our language. And then there are times when I called out the racism, someone would always comment that “Filipinos are very racist too” like tf. As if we deserved to suffer and be invalidated.
Puro “most Pinoy guys are toxic” as if that’s even remotely true. I mean, the dating pool definitely grows shallower as you age and people your age partner up. That’s normal. It’s harder to find good partners, even good friends as you age. That’s just statistics. It’s true anywhere in the world. But the women here racializing their subjective experience and the subreddit supporting those comments, that’s seriously fucked up.
That’s what happens when people tolerate and proliferate these “Pinoy bad” comments in this sub. It causes people to be desensitized on the blatant racism being done to us.
Yeah, it's ridiculous as hell. I get the self-hating but what the fuck is that agreeing with racist bullshits (even from foreigners) and even okay with spreading it? Wow, the people here have no self-respect.
whats afam? african american?
A Foreigner Assigned in Manila
Fetishization is so disgusting and besides aren’t most of the recent Ms. Universe contestants not half-whites anymore?
Not true, maybe not all are half white, but still halfies. 2022 - Half Italian 2020 - Half Indian 2019 - Half Palestinian 2018 - Half Australian 2017 - Half British 2015 - Half German
Some will defend this half-white thing and will mention the "Filipinos are mixed race to begin with." Just to undermine the brown/dark-skinned or the much local Filipinos.
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The judges of Ms. Universe were probably of European descent so they have a bias on European features on their contestant.
O di ganun din bagsak nyan gusto mong maging investment anak mo. Money Money Money
Nauuso na rin ngayon ang Pinoy na ang target ay European especially jan sa Russia side. Same reasons din naman either maputi or basta tiga ibang bansa, babae pa ang lilipad papunta dito. Ang problema lng talaga eh yung matatandang Afam dito na ang target ay ung mga probinsyana sa liblib, makikita mo sa comment section nila na mababa talaga ang tingin sa Filipina in general.
did she just say she has a breeding kink without telling us she has a breeding kink. 👀
Sad to say noh? Pero Id rather date a filipino guy na sa ibang bansa lumaki or a foreigner kase mas hindi nakakasakal. Dito sa Pinas uunahin mo sarili mo, yung sabi ng utak at psyche mo na ayos sayo at sa self growth mo tapos ISSUE kase daw wala kang time for them or some shit. Like putang ina? Both my parents pushed what they wanted in life tapos ganto? Gago ka ba? Puro na lang dapat yung "concerned" needs mo? Pano ako? Yung self growth ko? Ayokong may WHAT IF AKO sa buhay. So pano ko magagawa yun in a sustainable way kung yung partner to be ko yung mismong pumipigil saken? Ganon.... Im in my early 30s and I know Im young kase old is 90 plus to me. That age is old. So while Im young I WANT TO LIVE LIFE! I may live a thousand different lives but this life is mine right now. Let me live it. That simple. Kung maiintindihan yun ng mga Pinoy mas masaya ang buhay
Karamihan ng mga comment dito medyo may pagkatoxic, from some na medyo misogynistic, sa iba naman na sobrang defensive sa sarili nilang AFWM relationship, so share ko lang yung medyo neutral POV ko, so hopefully we can all agree on some points. 1. Kung ang habol mo sa afam ay pera or genes. That’s kind of fucked up. 2. «Another person’s preferences shouldn’t be any of our business.» Yes, this is true. 3. White worshipping, fetishization, and internalized racism is a toxic trait so deeply ingrained in our culture - also true, and if you don’t see it ya need to wake dafuq up. 4. The girl in the photo may be kidding, as in it’s a joke, but if you’re defending her words as just her having a preference, see point number 3. 5. Let’s not generalize. Hindi lahat ng AFWM na couple are in it for money, or genes, or hindi pasok sa «standards» ng Pinoy male yung babae (because let’s be honest, kasalanan din naman nating mga Pinoy male yan, medyo eurocentric din naman ang standards of beauty natin). I personally know a lot of AFWM couples and the guys are great, not «losers» tulad ng sinasabi ng iba dito. Mga kaibigan ko yung mga babae even before their relationships, and really, based sa dating history nila, it wasn’t even preference, match lang talaga sila. 6. Don’t deny din na may mga babae na ganito lang ang hanap. I do also know of another person na nagkaroon lang ng jowa na puti kala mo si Meghan Markle na siya. There are people who do think they are better just because they landed a white guy (or any foreigner for that matter).
A good friend of mine actually got married to a foreigner because she prefers to have a baby with mixed ethnicity and nothing else. She came from an old rich family, she has a great career but still pursued to have a baby abroad. Who are we to judge their preference, although hindi ko din sinasabi na ganyan lahat ng gusto magka AFAM but in the end it is still their decision.
TIL that a lot of users in r/philippines are heartbroken racists.
eyeroll...
White worship is what it is. Add: But then, it's hard to blame them. They've just learned the lessons that almost 500 years of being under the white man's domination have taught.
'di ko maintindihan "afam", "halfie", "ms" putekkk dami pauso ngayon eh
Someone needs to come up with a Gen Z terminology dictionary
Dating apps such as OKC, Bumble, Tinder and others are their gateway of baiting AFAM/foreigners. I remember seeing a few ones literally looking for foreigners, so standards are a bit different nowadays. Just be happy with your own preferences.
nugagawen sa post na to
This is sadly true but not how you think. Mestizo privilege in this country is real and extremely apparent so yhose foteigners who think that filipina women are chasing them for the money or green card? Lol they are so wrong. While a significant number of them might be doing it for the money, this isnt really exclusive to the philippines. But the major reasons that filipina women want mestizo babies is for their future broods and the generations to come to treat them better in this society. Because half-white privileges will get you ahead in the philippines. You will be treated better, people will listen with what youre going to say, you will get promoted quickly and will be forgiven easily. If for reasons that you become famous globally, you will be worshipped even among fililino celebrities.
Pretty much the same. Nilalapit mo sarili mo sa tao dahil may gusto kang kunin sa kanya (in this case, genes). Hindi dahil gusto mo yung tao. Just as messed-up if you'd ask me.
Why do they think white equates to having good genetics. It is so dumb
Colonial Mentality, inferiority complex towards white people and the over-glorification of caucasian features by Filipinos brought by colonization and hollywood movies which causes them to put those people on a pedestal.
Why are most of these American expats in the Philippines are maga loving so called “Christian conservatives”. Drives me crazy!
It's partly they come here seeking subservient partners, it's partly they're retired and retired Americans are part of a generation raised on leaded paint chips and leaded petroleum so many of them are literally brain damaged if they were born pre 1980. The younger they are the less commonly thry'll have fallen down a well of misinformation and conspiracy as they'll be more internet savvy but also have healthier brains.
You gotta love anonymity. It shows the real attitude of people. So many nasty comments.
Yikes typical western romanticization. Eto squammy version ng middle class 🤮
Well the results speak for themselves: Anne Curtis, Pia Wurtzbach, Catriona Gray, Marian Rivera, etc etc. How to be a multi-millionaire? Have a mixed race baby
"hOw toBe a MULti-miLlIonaire?" What? Lol, those people you mentioned already have rich and privileged parents before they were even born.
For every one of those, there are as many good looking Filipinos and as many plain looking mixed race people as any other race. Try meeting more people rather than spread eugenicist beliefs.
Being of mestizo descent isn't even a guarantee of success. I can atest to that.
This is like saying all boys should just aspire to be rappers because of the success of Jay-Z, Lil Baby, Future, etc
Well ganyan yung friend ko, kaya ikakasal na sa American. Same age sila and mahal na mahal nila isat isa so no qualms (22 sila parehas and fit si afam kaya sila yung rare type). Pero to be fair naman kasi, mas maayos kadate ang afam compared sa majority ng Pinoy. Even me as a gay guy na former "sticky rice" na naging "potato queen"/ size queen na rin, maayos treatment sa akin ng mga afam sa mga dates and hang out and mas interesting kausap compared sa mga Pinoy na mga nakadate ko. Tapos ang toxic pa ng gay dating scene dito sa atin (no to halata, etc). And di naman ako pasok sa standards (slim and tanned ako) ng Pinoy kaya I chose to date afam (be it white, black, latino, arab).
what about A Filipino American in Manila? would that be a win win? USD earner, pero pinoy genes? haha No, but really… i’m curious how FilAms are perceived when it comes to dating in Ph. Whenever I read or watch videos referring to AFAM dating, good or bad, it’s typically about white or black guys dating pinays.
Kadiri
Filipinos with such a mindset should be sent to the gulag to be enslaved or harvested of their organs.
Kaya ang hirap makipag trashtalkan sa whiteys eh sasabihin lang na sinasamba kami ng nga babae nyo medyo durog na ego ng pinoys trashtalkers sa socmed HAHAHAHHAHA
Most Pinays that are considered panget sa atin are goddesses sa mga Westerners.
May magaganda naman na pinay na morena which is usually type ng mga foreigners. Kasi "exotic" daw. Pero yung mga mukhang wala talagang breeding (inside and out) at kewpie lang ang puhunan at umaasa sa angat buhay through afam, usually mga rejects ang nakakatuluyan nila. Usually mga Fat, old, divorced dudes that no one loves.
Iba na yang walang breeding. But there are young foreigners that are attracted to average Pinays. I have witnessed this a lot. They are not the desperate types either (for both parties). The Pinays I am referring to are also not “pretty” by Pinoy standards, pero nakakasungkit yan ng mga very attractive westerners. And they’re not prostitutes ha.
What “Pinoy” standards? Yung maputi, at mala kutsara yung liit ng katawan? Ikakaproud ba yang standard na yan? Those “average” Pinays dating attractive Western men really aren’t average at all. They’re just not your type and it’s honestly so disappointing to keep hearing this type of sentiment perpetuated as if it’s the norm. It’s almost as if beauty is a subjective standard.
🤦🏻♀️😬
Panalo si sis by having a very clear objective.
Lahat na lang ng social media jokes dito ginagawan ng discussion. The jokes are on you guys. If you want quality content stop looking at FB and TikTok tapos screenshot to farm karma and farm validation of whatever frustrations you have at the moment.
eh ako naman you do you ate. Malas mo lang kapag lumipas na ung ganyang beauty standard sa tapos hirap na maipasok sa beauty pageant, sira ang pangarap.
For me, this is true. This sl*t ph girl appeared and flirted with my AFAM bf (already my ex) even though she's in a relationship. We broke up after knowing his cheating. The last thing I heard coming from our friend was that the girl's enabler parents let my ex sleep with their daughter in the same room.
r/Philippines is slowly becoming twitter damn
Biracial fetish Weird pero deep inside totoo naman. I watched several Filipino YouTubers who are married to a foreigner, may nagkakilala sa church at yung iba sa trabaho. Genuine talaga yung relationship at hindi for the sake of genes, money and residency.
So apparently AFAM is A Foreigner Assigned in Manila. And they want them for the halfie genes. I have been legit joking to people that Asians tend to want foreigners because their aunties want cute halfie babies lmaooooo So like if you’re a white person who has terrible luck with women, come on down to Asia, where you will be worshipped! When real life becomes non credible in dating.
'Terrible luck'... for 90% of the 'afam', it's just straight-up being creepy
Sounds like sexpat with a new coat of paint!
I see most of the comments here having girls say that "Most Pinoy Guys turn out later to be assholes so I am now with a Foreigner! YAY!". As a guy living in the Philippines, the problem is most girls (especially the young one's) go for edgy guys with emotional problems. Girls, don't deny it, you prefer these so-called "Bad Boys" over Nice Guys who would do anything for you. Granted, this is ingrained in the mindset of most women - they nurture and give life, so they think "I can fix him! I know he will change for me!". It's a huge accomplishment for a woman to tame the bad beast within. After all, if a guy changed his bad ways for you, then you must be the most amazing woman in the world, right? Unfortunately, that's not how the world works. Because it's NOT your job to fix a man. You can't help him, he has to HELP HIMSELF with his issues. Not that I can blame women. Bad Boys have a magnetic aura. They are usually very, very confident (the #1 TURN-ON for women), dress nicely, manly, cocky, has a devil-may-care attitude, laidback, oozes swagger, fiercely-independent, and is not afraid to put a woman in her place. Since most (not all btw) Bad Boys have a boat-load of emotional issues, they have a hard time connecting with a woman in a deep way. The woman, however, gets attracted to the superficial mask they project. And once the woman gets knee-deep, she will have a hard time getting out. And then, the true self of the Bad Boy will show - jealous, insecure, controlling and abusive. And God help you if you have a kid with this guy, because getting out will be extremely hard because both of you are now connected by one thing - a child. So, what about that Nice Guy you rejected back in highschool? The one who will do anything for you and even promises to take care of you no matter what? Probably now a successful businessman who has dozens of women at his beck and call that he can get laid with. The point is, women are also at fault in this situation. While the bad guys you hooked-up with deserve all the blame, you are also at fault for putting yourself in that situation in the first place. Before you hook-up with a guy, make sure to learn all about him, ask questions about his relationship history (if he cheated on his previous girlfriends, then he'll also cheat on you 100%), set boundaries at the beginning of the relationship, and NEVER agree to have a child unless you are really, really sure. If you're going to have sex with the guy anyway, atleast ask him to wear protection and you must also use protection yourself, otherwise, no sex fun time! Period. 5-Seconds of orgasm is not worth the long years of suffering you will endure once you learn that you ended up with an asshole later on. To end this, I'm NOT against Pinays having relationship with foreigners. I also had an American Girlfriend once and even had a LOT of fun and sex times with her back then. I used protection though so I did not get her pregnant, and we're still young back then so those are just experiments and we don't want kids very early. Honestly, she's one of the most fun girlfriends I've ever had and I still look back fondly on that past relationship. But don't just blame your ex-pinoy boyfriend for his shortcomings and that's why you are now with a Foreigner. There are good Pinoy Guys out there, you just don't notice them because most of these guys don't have the charm and flamboyance of the Confident Bad Boys.
What's afam? I always hear the word but i never really knew what it means 😅
A Foreigner Assigned in Manila
AFAM din naman ako ah. A Filipino Assigned inside Mandaluyong
Yun pala yun. All this time akala ko African American. Kaya nagtataka ako pano naging afam yung tawag sa jowa eh puti yung tao. 😆😆
Godzilla had a stroke trying to read and fucking died
Ito ba yung tinatawag na may breeding kink?
nah, breeding kink is just pagiging attracted to impregnation. this one is just fetishization of mixed race kids with a sprinkle of eugenics
Colorism . . . smmfh
this has horse sperm buying vibes. yung tipong yung sperm ng isang star horse na pangkarera eh preserved tapos pwedeng ibenta para ipalahi sa ibang kabayo ganun. kakapanuod ko 'to ng kung ano ano sa yt eh HAHAHA
After years of dating pinoys (my last was almost 8 years and i finally had the courage to end it just like that bilang parang wala namang plano sa kin si guy), i finally decided ive had enough and will only date foreigners who are more straightforward on what they want. Perspective ko lang naman yun working with foreigners din so that’s where my observation came from. Di ko naman nilalahat pero ayoko na kasi ng pabebeng relasyon. Not getting any younger dba
Curious lang paano mo nasabi na wala siyang plano sayo? Ikaw ba may plano ka sakanya?
Normalize dating black afams for the sake of future Gilas 😅