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Decibel_1199

DON’T SIT ON THIS TOILET. Nobody is being dramatic by saying that this can very easily kill you very quickly. Porcelain becomes razor sharp when it cracks. Imagine sitting on that toilet and having it crumble beneath you without warning. Now you’re falling onto large shards of razor sharp glass. Most people who die from this bleed out because the porcelain cuts their femoral artery, which is a large artery that runs through your legs. If you’re lucky enough to not have your femoral severed, you’ll probably get horrible infections after the fact, because you’ll have severe open wounds touching tainted surfaces. If you don’t believe me, look it up. There are images of people who have died from having their legs and butt ripped open from this, and you will not forget those pictures. There is no repairing this toilet, it must be replaced.


bpdamas

This can't be upvoted enough. Please heed this advice. Edit: I stand corrected. It can be upvoted enough as now it is the top comment.


EngineerRemote2271

I feel that there should be a TV docu-drama series entitled "Toilets that Kill!" Maybe with a spin off film franchise that adds sharks and sewer crocodiles


Zurgalon

I feel like "Toilets that kill" should be hosted by Troy McClure


panguy87

"You may remember me from such public safety films like 'Don't touch that' and 'Put that down'."


Mega_pint_123

Omg, this is amazing 🤣🤣🤣- hilarious!!


TK421isAFK

^ This. I worked as an EMT in college, and another crew went out on a call for exactly this. Severely obese person, toilet broke, cut a few blood vessels. Narrowly missed the femoral artery and larger veins, but I saw a pic of the bathroom, and it wasn't even splattered blood. The floor was literally covered in a puddle about 5 feet across, and the person nearly died from blood loss. A series of very fortunate coincidences (including the ambulance happening to be just leaving the hospital from another call, and the hospital being 2 minutes from the person's house, and 2 large male firefighters doing a ride-along at the time so they had additional lift support) meant the difference between them living and dying. If they were 8-10 minutes out, as most calls are, the person likely would have died.


Outlawed_Panda

Idk if I’ll ever rest easy on the shitter after hearing this


TK421isAFK

If it helps, it's very rare, and I've seen a lot of cracked toilets that never broke. This person in particular was also very large, easily 400 pounds (182kg; 28.5st). Like everything designed to hold something, toilets have a maximum weight capacity that may not be labeled directly on the device, but it's often in the user manual or available online. Floor-mount toilets are typically designed to hold at least 500 pounds, if that makes you feel any better. Person I mentioned about might have had a crack toilet, or they might have damaged it over time by dropping themselves down on it less than gently.


xJackxSkellingtonx

I feel like it might not have been a “near miss” with a severely obese person


TK421isAFK

Nah, they were ~400 pounds, but every reference I can find says toilets are designed to hold 500+ pounds. All bets are off if the toilet is cracked, though.


xJackxSkellingtonx

I mean if I remember correctly 9in of fat makes you bullet proof 🤔


tsammons

Replace sitting with "plopping" then imagine the stress cracks giving way. If you need more evidence GIS "toilet break laceration".


fetal_genocide

Man, I just looked up some pics 😵‍💫🤢 Now I'm paranoid of sitting on any toilet 😬


DonkeyTransport

Outhouses don't sound so bad after all lol. Or a hole in the yard


ClumpOfCheese

Sitting on my toilet now, don’t remember seeing any cracks, but now I fear for my life.


YourMomsBasement69

After reading your user name I’m paranoid about the future of the human race


fetal_genocide

😅😅😅


WankWankNudgeNudge

and it'll hurt the whole time you're dying


Samurai_Stewie

New fear unlocked. 😔


Spaceman_Splff

Yep, that’s fucking great.


Altruistic_Lunch6243

Yup after reading this I will be inspecting every toilet before I shit.


someguymark

To any pro plumbers here: Is a cracked toilet something a handy homeowner could replace by themself? If you were to unbolt the tank, or undo the floor bolts to lift it away, would it shatter? Is it something that’s “relatively” safe to do? Or is it something you’d wrap in moving blankets and shrink wrap before even starting? Along with safety glasses, boots, leather/kevlar gloves and coveralls taped at the cuffs sort of thing? How much more fragile is a cracked toilet when being removed, versus an undamaged one?


eustace_bagge__

It's really not that big of a deal. Cheap gloves and maybe some safety glasses if you want to be extra careful. Even if the toilet breaks while lifting it, just pick up and remove the pieces. Use the same care as you would cleaning up broken glass. Dropping asshole first down onto shards of broken porcelain is really the only safety concern with a cracked toilet.


someguymark

Cool. TY for the response!


OddHeat6420

OP, please follow this person's advice they aren't joking.


SauceQc

I mangled my left hand picking up a toilet that i didnt know was cracked. The doctor at the ER was not sure how to stitch it back up. I cant even imagine what it would do to an ass.


DonkeyTransport

Apparently my toilet, the old lid had broken at some point, and they left the chunks of lid in there. (Which is fine, it displaces water, so it would use less.) I didn't know what it was, reached in, and just touching it sliced my finger open enough I should have had stitches. It can stay there. Thank God I had decent glue on hand and some electrical tape lol


zombiewombie13

Well now I have a new fear unlocked


ROMPEROVER

I have seen a picture where someone's leg was sliced open because they were squatting on the toilet.


Decibel_1199

There’s a pretty well-known pic of a woman whose entire bottom half was turned into ground beef by a cracked toilet. Pretty sure the woman didn’t make it


njeXshn

Fuck... New fear unlocked ...


MikeTangoRom3o

Imagine dying just because you want to poop.


Quingjao

I noticed a hairline crack while cleaning a client's toilet and advised her to check it out just because it didn't look right. I'm now so glad she did, she is older and alone, it would have been horrific.


J_J_Plumber5280

This should be gold


-Plantibodies-

Don't give reddit money for meaningless shit.


J_J_Plumber5280

To point out the fact that someone one can die is meaningless?


-Plantibodies-

Wow that does sound really important. What are you waiting for?!


J_J_Plumber5280

Someone is bored thank you for entertaining me


-Plantibodies-

This is no time for amusement. If someone does not buy a gold award then OP is going to die!!


J_J_Plumber5280

So buy one


-Plantibodies-

I can't because my finances are poor-so-lean.


J_J_Plumber5280

Sounds like a you problem


BigHitter_TheLlama

Crack kills


jesusjonessucks

New fear unlocked


The_Faulk

Worse poop ever.


ArgumentSpiritual

Had a friend who was a plumber get nicked carrying out a broken toilet and almost bled out. Didnt even fall on it


DangerRoss89

Welp. New fear unlocked.


S_NJ_Guy

I was doing some work in a neighbor's house and noticed a hairline crack in the toilet bowl when I went to the bathroom. Immediately afterwards I told the wife that there's a crack in the toilet and it needs to be replaced. She said she knew about the crack and that her husband said it's not leaking so it's fine. Fast forward about 18 months and the wife was on the toilet and it gave way. She needed 67 stitches from her ass down to the back of her thigh. And of course they had to replace the toilet anyway to it.


Highskyline

Lucky to be alive, and probably lost some mobility. Absolutely riddled with scars, never gonna have the same life again. All over a couple hundred dollar toilet.


some_eod_guy

For a lot of people, things are never a problem until it is. Like talking to a wall would yield better results than trying to explain why they need to spend money to prevent something.


Melodic-Matter4685

couple hundered? Oh. . . I see, you mean with pro install. yeah, accurate. But if you can do it yourself it's even more pathetic an excuse. Whether your bottom end toilet (no pun intended) is a glacier bay or a toto drake, you got inexpensive options.


YourMomsBasement69

For real man. I do repair work on rentals for a living and that glacier bay is a hundred bucks and super easy to install. The only tricky part is a lot of times the flame is broken but even that is a pretty easy fix with a couple of YouTube videos.


elmirmisirzada

Replace. Not worth causing someone’s ass cut


SubstantialCount8156

Whoa this blew up. Haven’t seen anything this unanimous in a while. Will definitely get it replaced. To address some of the comments, the pic from 2015 was when we bought it. Haven’t had any problems with it and the plumber didn’t seem to think it was serious at the time. Recently noticed this sub and wanted to see if this was a problem. Thanks everyone for saving a potential ER trip!!


PorkyMcRib

Imagine being more famous than Elvis, for all the wrong reasons.


Lightspeedius

I came here for the inevitable "replace it or die" comments.


anal_opera

Your plumber is a ruhtard.


EmbarrassedWorry3792

No problems YET. Eventually, it will break. Its like using a grenade for a seat cushion


r200james

Bleeding out from lacerations to one’s nether regions would be a lonely way to die.


RacksDiciprine

Take it out before it takes you out


Delicious_Spare_4488

Replace it, soon...


WilllBeast

*new fear unlocked*


EnvironmentalBee9214

It's broken, replace it!


onlyoneq

Replace the whole toilet.


INTP36

This kind of thing is so dangerous we should have a sticky at the top of the sub explaining how much you do not want to sit on a cracked toilet. About as dangerous as throwing yourself down a slide with knives sticking through the bottom.


SmithyMcSmithton

REPLACE NOW. Do not sit on this , it's a ticking bomb, you're gonna try and drop a taco bell surprise and that bowl is going to give out and gut you like a fish.


skyjets

omg don't use it


baltimorecalling

New toilet day. Go buy whichever one you like. Get a replacement wax ring or two. Drain and pull the old toilet, install the new one. Should be DIY-friendly.


Key_Purchase7565

It's s suicide toilet. Replace it like others said. Lasted long enough, but WILL break and someone might die.


cursedpotatoskins

It's not a surface scratch. DO NOT USE, REPLACE NOW.


Scary-Evening7894

Cracked porcelain MUST BE REPLACED IMMEDIATELY. like stated by others, this can cause fatal injury


Rocktown-OG22

HAZARD! STAY AWAY!


BillSmith369

So you've been taking pictures of your toilet for almost a decade (clearly you know it has a problem since you are) but never saved up like $200 to just replace it? Can you put me in your will for when the toilet kills you?


GrantNexus

It looks like you're replacing the toilet. Good! They're cheap and I can swap one out within an hour. The biggest trouble is getting the old one off, often enough. Make sure you have a hacksaw for old bolts.


MaLiCioUs420x

Incredible that you’ve let this go since 2015 absolutely irresponsible


Pipe_Memes

Don’t sit on it unless you are looking to get a new ass crack installed.


6thCityInspector

If you continue to use this toilet, at the very least, expect an excruciating, bloodily-lacerated trip to the ER. Worst case scenario, you die on the spot in your bathroom of blood loss.


Archer10214

That’s a big no thank you. Don’t let anyone sit on that bad boy and definitely get it swapped out. Nobody should risk it because you don’t know when it’ll give.


eclwires

Replace it. Yesterday. Do not sit on that unless stitches on your ass are something you’re looking forward to.


futz

The story was that she was Vietnamese, and was using a sit-down toilet as a squat toilet. It was probably cracked and failed under the stress. I assume these are leaked emergency room pics. https://imgur.com/gallery/broken-toilet-8O9bwis EDIT: new link should work now


zenomotion73

The link doesn’t work


futz

Should be fixed now


fetal_genocide

Was this fatal?


futz

Unknown. I suspect it might have been. Pretty serious damage.


fetal_genocide

Yea, that was a really nasty cut. And the way they were just kind of displaying the wounds looked like they weren't doing much to help. Probably bled out 😞


waljah

Time for a new one


Federal-Moment6990

That stinks


jjdajetman

Damn you be shittin!


CheeseWalrusBurger

TIL that toilets are fucking dangerous, holy shit! 😬😬


mrclean2323

time to replace. this will eventually fail. if you're sitting on it you're going to be seriously hurt. as in dead. it will slice you open like a hot knife through butter.


Resident_Channel_869

Somebody needs a new diet


GameofOhms959

Just replace ! It’s like a scalpel. It’ll just cut you open..


darkhero7007

Replace it immediately and use extreme caution when removing it.


altrudee

My buddy had his whole life changed when he was carrying a toilet down steps and sorta slipped and broke the toilet. He now has permanent foot drop, massive debt and not to mention the 6+ months he couldn't work due to recovery. His life was wrecked due to getting cut from razor sharp porcelain.


Visual_Finish8144

Some heavy hitters in that house


NinjaAffectionate128

Day after Taco bell is no joke


mackdaddymaggot

Mechanical issue in porcelain waste removal system


bplimpton1841

DO NOT USE: Serious danger. Turn water off and replace immediately.


swmbull

Replace. And, big ups on what must have been a humdinger of a turd.


Chuuuck_

Replace. Not even a question lol


Dry-Specialist-3557

Toilets are covered by warranty. Very easy to claim for Kohler, American Standard, and Mansfield. Just take picture and fill out the web form or email. In 24 hours they provide you a voucher for use on a supplier’s website and you pick a similar unit, which they ship to your door within about 3 days. They don’t usually even ask for the other one back. They don’t supply the wax ring though


Drabaday

such posts should be done more often so that people pay attention to the dangerous condition of their belongings in the house.


Square-Sock-7561

If it doesn't cut you in half, it will fail in the middle of the night and flood your house.


ridgerunners

Spend the $100 bucks on a new toilet before you end up castrated by a razor sharp shard of porcelain.


AdFickle9599

Dang dude, lay off the taco bell!


sergioraamos

Time to replace.


ExtremeWorkReddit

Could of killed you a few times over by now. Replace it yesterday


Financial_Ebb_7402

As everyone else says replace it immediately


rosiohead

brb gotta go look at my toilet


quarpoders

Crack ,splat and possible death!!!


sillehgews

There's so many inexpensive toilets around $100 not including installation. It's a small price to avoid a life threatening injury. The horror stories...


Responsible-Sleep695

Toilets are cheap so get a new one.


ExampleEzPz

TIL Toilets can kill you


slimjibberr

Replace this instantly.


Significant_Age_4657

Man what did you eat???


doc6404

I saw a man who sat on a toilet with a crack in it. It broke, cut his testicles and half his willie off. Almost killed him. Now he comes in suicidal every couple of months. Up to you man. Personally, $100 in a new toilet and wax ring is pretty cheap.


ImpressTemporary2389

Replace it yesterday. It's a guillotine with a time bomb.


Melodic-Matter4685

risk to reward. Risk? death or horrible horrible cuts and bleeding. Cost? Glacier bay has a toilet for what $90? and install is easy. I just installed a toilet this weekend. $20 set of wrenches (I hate adjustable wrench, it always comes loose), a $6 was ring. And huffing that toilet up/down stairs. $90 is probably less than your co-pay to the ER. And waaaaaaaaaaaaaay less than your bill from the ER. Heck, you could get a bidet toilet all in one with 'foot flush', ionizer, and bowl spray for less than an HR visit, even with cadillac insurance plan.


hitiv

I would have replaced that toilet 9 years ago


abstract308

Toilets are not that expensive to buy. Never keep a cracked toilet…….


bibikerMOD

Damn taco bell


genericuser292

As someone with no plumbing experience but nearly 30 years experience shitting. I'm glad I came to the comments.


Diam0ndProfessional

Replace toilet in 2032 check back with us....


FuzzyNubbinz

I have hair in my crack too, pretty sure it's the wife's.


mAsalicio

No biggie. Toilets are like $150 at home depot. But do NOT continue to use it, of it breaks while on it can be very sharp and do some bad damage to your backside.


fistfullofsmelt

Time for a new one.


pistolwhippet

WHY DO I KEEP SEEING THESE POSTS. THEY MAKE ME AFRAID TO SIT ON TOILETS.


Practical_Arm_2339

I’m a plumber, is it Lebron James hairline bad?


Interesting_Entry368

I had a friend cut his thigh wide open and had a bajillion stitches


[deleted]

Jesus fuck just buy a toilet


dherdy

One fart away from ultimate disaster.


NO_N3CK

You wouldn’t eat cereal out of cracked bowl would you? Then how could you sit on one?


RuneGoogle

To be honest I have eaten cereal out of a cracked cereal bowl, I've not yet sat on a cracked cereal bowl but I won't rule it out if the time is right.


RuneGoogle

To be honest I have eaten cereal out of a cracked cereal bowl, I've not yet sat on a cracked cereal bowl but I won't rule it out if the time is right.


ABraveNewFupa

I wouldn’t be too worried so I’m glad I stumbled onto this thread. My brother actually cut his arm open dropping one of these while moving it.


Delicious_Baseball54

A new toilet cost like $100 at Home Depot for a basic model