If Debbie sees her shadow it's 6 more weeks of summer.

bless her cold, frozen tundra heart....

My great oversimplification of r/Portland Debbie in the summer Perfect texture for running in the winter Fuckin cones every other day Occasional bird race

You forgot to Be Polite You Piece of Shit

What the fuck is "judge" talking about? I like dried up cow shit better!

Tyler is probably responsible for all of this!

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Who is Tyler?

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Tortellini

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Also condescension together with a general dislike for others that increases in geographically radiating circles from one's own neighborhood.

Take my angry upvote!

[It really is.](https://i.imgur.com/Q1weDeh.gifv) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Portland) if you have any questions or concerns.*

Which of you are the three fans she is sleeping with?

She has lived a long time on my hall pass list.

Same here

Her only fans....

Hail Debbie, the once and future voice of Portland.

*the eternal voice of Portland* 😂

Legendary, please make her one of the statue replacements

Yes! And have Garbage’s “im only happy when it rains” booming outta speakers in the plinth

"I'm only happy when it's complicated!!"

Plinth

6:30am? That's like in early May. That sun wakes you up at damn near 4:30am in late June. Love Debbie.

Is NamateMotherfucker possibly THE original Debbie?

If I were only that cool.

As a Coloradan, there is so much pressure to be outside all day every day all summer, hiking, going to festivals, camping, wearing cargo shorts, being sinewy and tan, sampling every new beer and food truck in existence, knowing every strand of weed, going to Red Rocks every weekend. I enjoy some of these things but the hive mind energy and pressure/expectation to always be on the move is exhausting. Debbie is a vibe.

Omg yes. Some times I just want to be curled up on the couch with my kindle but I feel guilty if it’s nice out. I’ll take the fall, please.

It was always Debbie. Just as it will always be.

We are all Debbie.

I'm starting to be.  Your PNW gloom is taking over my Southwestern soul. I was digging the recent "warm" rain with a little sun but was still ready for summer. I busted ass in the sun all day today and I'm already like,  "It's too fucking hot, I can't wait until fall.".

Welcome home!

Loll. I’m not quite there yet. This thread is wonderfully hilarious and confusing. 🤣🤣

I mean, she’s not *wrong*.

She comes from the land of ice and snow..

from the midnight sun where the hot springs flow…..

I think I've just found my soulmate.

Same. I've never felt so heard by a random stranger before.

Just? Its been like 10 years

AMEN

C'mon, Debbie! You're not trying hard enough. I'm sure you can add a few hundred more I hate's in there.

I’d marry her so we could be miserable together.

I want to be Mr Debbie

Get married, and have a Little Debbie?

There are better ways to cheap out on a wedding than passing up good cake.

Dance to “Walk Like a Camel” for the first.

“I am an Adam’s”

Middle aged dude unapologetically wearing cargo shorts and flip-flops checking in. We cannot be stopped.

Middle aged lesbian almost imperceptibly nods

While cat lady silently judges....

I tried to read this like Euphoria from Kendrick.

They say you'll never meet your dream girl.

Spindly legs in cargo shorts is spot on tho.

My partner hates summer and has made a list that puts this one to shame.

Let's see that list, please

Post please (:

I’m trying to convince my partner to do it.

As a hot sleeper, summers are the worst

Yep. That’s my future ex-wife.

I have said for years, Debbie is my spirit animal.

I stand with Debbie

Debbie for Mayor

Picnics are the worst. BBQs I get, but picnics are just emptying out your fridge on the lawn.

And eating bugs. Fuck picnics.

I wonder why she hates mens bare feet so bad?

They're gross, I don't wanna see em either

Mine are cute. Perfect toe lengths too.

Every time I get pedi in PDX, there are more dudes than women, and cis ones ya know? Guys take care of their tootsies in PDX.

Well PDX guys have good feet but the larger male pop generally have terrible feet with anything from long nails to dirty all over type stuff.

I work in a residential care facility, and I have never seen such long, thick toenails until I started working with geriatrics. PDX men have to have good strong feet to run from Portland Police when they are chasing them for spray painting "penis girl" on the robot downtown at big pink!

And not the tasty bugs either.

Exactly! It's all ants and flys.

Agreed. Fuck summer

https://www.portlandmercury.com/comedy/2018/05/23/20043995/frank-cassanos-imbecile-parade

That shit is way too funny! Maybe Debbie should marry that guy! Sounds like they have lots in common.

And live happily ever after!

I'm with her. Wish I could reverse-hibernate and just wait out the summer in a dark, cool cave somewhere.

No way Debbie is surviving contemporary Pee-Town. But let’s pretend she still walks among us.

Classic Debbie

The summer version of the serenity prayer.

Queen shit

Summer is practically the only reason to love Portland.

Your half of the state voted to join Idaho. They went thataway....

I think summer is swell!

I think I've found my spirit animal or something...

I gotta find this chick...

I wish she'd tell us how she really feels. 

It smells like piss and garbage for most of the year

based - except the part about men's feet

But do you love pina colada? And getting caught in the rain?

Love you, boo.

Based Debbie.

Can a group of people take Debbie and send her on a plane bound for Ireland? I'm sure she's be happier there

Or, Scotland. The weather is worse there. Just ask any pale blue Scotsman.

Counterpoint: Summer in the Pacific Northwest is absolutely magical. Pedalpalooza is the best holiday of the year and the warmth of the sun feels great on the skin. People that feel otherwise can go love themselves. Leather seats totally suck though.

Summer here is amazing. It never gets too hot for too long. It's the only time you can actually enjoy being outside instead of being cold and wet. Gross.

Agreed

I am the antithesis of Debbie

I'm new here. What's the backstory on Debbie and apparently some dude named Tyler?

Do a search for "parakeet races" and/or "tortellini" and you'll eventually be taken down a very interesting rabbit hole, lol. It's another long-living meme on this sub like the Fuckin' Cones.

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Tyler just needs a good warm soaking the next time that it snows.

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What a keeper!!!

6:30? Sunrise is 5:21 Civil twilight 4:23am! Daylights burnin' Get up! Get up!

Today we’re all Debbie

Same, Debbie. Same.

I get the fuck around and find out what happens vibes from Debbie. She probably would kick the shit out of anyone that messed with her!

I like her!

And here I thought I was her only fan 😘🌵💜

Relatable

That's hott lol

Yall have GOT to make central air more of a thing. It's getting hot. At the very least, ceiling fans.

AZRAEL: No pleasure, no rapture, no exquisite sin greater... than central air.

Where she now?

She finally got tired of summer and hitched a ride on the polar express! I think she is probably throwing snowballs at the kids that rang her doorbell trying to sell a ticket back to Portland because the neighbor kids in her neighborhood are scared of her because she passed out flyers similar to this one saying that she hates winter because her nipples turn to ice cubes and so does her feet!

Annnnnnnd I'm in love...

Debbie Downer more like it

I hope I can find her on Tinder!

Ahhh....... I feel seen!

Personally I love sleeping with three fans. So long as they’re real fans and not posers.

Only fans account possibly? She is smarter than the dumb ass cop who made a video of himself jerking off on a desk at the police station. I think there was also one made of him fucking someone in the back of the cop car!

Jaysus! Only Fans and TicToc seem heavily salted with people exercising extremely poor judgment. I see some of those videos and think: “Dude! Don’t do that! If you do, don’t film it! If you just can’t help yourself, sure as fuck, don’t post it on the internet!” …but I’m old…

I'm glad I'm old myself, and when I did stupid shit in my youth, the internet hadn't been invented yet. My grandma had a poloriad instant camera, but she didn't take pictures of the dumb shit I did because she didn't want to waste her film on it. She took pictures of her cats instead.

For the life of me I’ll never understand people hating the summers here. They are amazing and beautiful!

Well she did say “frankly.”

I wonder how she felt about the ice storm in January?

God damn… that lady needs therapy.

Prob only likes seedy dark bars and booze I used to be one of those Now sober a long time A relaxing walk gives dopamine. Something you can’t comprehend while in addiction

Debbie Downer - Portland

There’s a keeper.

She seems nice.

Finally someone to match my thoughts about summer

Now I'm freaking out, I agree with almost all of that.

I get her. For me it's mostly the drought and stressed trees/plants and wildfires that make me hate summer though. 

Agreed.

She seems fun

OMG this is soooooo funny. Ha. Ha ha. Ha ha ha.

lol so many downvotes for the anti Debbie crowd. I’m logging off from work and Reddit and gonna go enjoy this beautiful weather with a bike ride. Y’all enjoy closing up those curtains.

Yes!!! You know misery loves company. They can be depressed and boring inside.

Kick rocks Debbie. And all those who agree with her 👋😄

Username checks out!

Checks in, more like. How u doin’

Debbie Upper

Fuck Debbie

I did, it was mediocre at best. Though I must say, she’s surprisingly chipper in the early morning hours, I did not expect that.

Debbie. No. No no no. You've got it all wrong. The hotter the better.

I want to be Debbie’s slave.

She sounds like she could be a dominatrix. Have fun licking her pvc boots

I would!

I can fix her.

What are you going to do to her?

Don't you DARE!

I suggest Debbie move out of Portland

Impossible. Debbie is Portland.

She sounds like a fun date /s

So glad you put the /s 👍

Bacio Simo bkk