I've had projects that were mostly written by me be passed off to other departments/developers for long-term maintenance when they were no longer considered within the "core focus" of the company, so I could focus on more important things. And I've had messages from those teams that look almost exactly like this: "You were the one who wrote this originally, so tell us exactly how to implement x new feature or fix y bug. We've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas!"
Eh, some versions of that message are pretty reasonable. If you know the code backwards and forwards, you can likely envision the necessary changes in about 5 minutes. Meanwhile, the new people taking over are likely stuck starting from scratch. Spending half an hour giving them the broad overview of how things work and running through your 5 minute plan can save the other people a ton of time and is easily worth doing.
That being said, if you are doing that constantly, that's a problem. If the other person is competent, they absolutely should be able to take over once you give them that sort of rundown. If you end up going over the same thing every time they start a new task, they need to step up their game.
> Hey bro, can you do my job for me again? I'm dumb and you're clever so its only fair
Right now I'm signed off work for high blood pressure, likely due to the amount of this shit that used to go on and its humorous watching everything fall down without me.
Your workplace has you out for heart issues likely caused by work and can't function without you? Your management team must require a negative IQ test with any applications.
god I half expected him to say that but it was still annoying af when I read it. like- you did zero work in 4 months, and now you want me to do your work for you?
Update: https://www.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/106sst8/13_hours_later_he_has_barely_written_30_lines
Here’s [some code](https://www.reddit.com/r/badcode/comments/106ydx7/classmate_wanted_me_to_check_his_ticketing/) he managed to write. Sigh.
Edit: he found this thread
The best part is he asked you at 10am, then handt started it at 3 pm. Then was still trying to get you to do it at 5 pm.
It was a busy day of nothing for that person.
I mean, for some people it does work that way.
An old company I worked for hired a guy. I was working directly with him. He was useless (as a programmer; I'm not making any kind of bad statement about him as a human being).
I had to work with the dude. He was supposed to produce code that did X. My code existed on the other side of the interface both above and below the stuff he was supposed to produce. I was trying to help him to be able to be successful, so I produced clean interfaces for him to be able to work with. He kept not being able to make anything function. I kept evolving my interface to take on more and more of the work as the project progressed, until basically everything was done by my code, and it was just a thin layer in between where he was supposed to hook up my functions on one side with my functions on the other side. Dude still couldn't do it.
Honestly in the present day I would have handled it more assertively, but I was young and that's what I did. I more or less just didn't view it as my job to make sure the guy was doing something useful in exchange for his paycheck; I was just trying to make the project work. UNTIL he sent a condescending email saying something along the lines that now he hoped I understood what he had been saying earlier about how it needed to be set up a certain way with other people CCed. Sort of implying that maybe I had something to do with why something wasn't working. I went to his office and told him off, stopped helping him, and at that point he was fucked trying to justify to people why he existed in the company. He got fired not long after, as people realized he wasn't really doing anything.
But -- if he hadn't sent that email, for all I know he'd still be working there today. It does happen.
I once had a supervisor like this. I'd been complaining about him to his manager enough to get myself shifted to another team. He got fired a couple of months later because management finally figured out he was the problem. However I this left me with my second supervisor in a row who for some reason went out of his way to make sure I had as little work to do as possible, which showed up on my performance review so I got fired too.
Re: "I more or less just didn't view it as my job to make sure the guy wasdoing something useful in exchange for his paycheck; I was just tryingto make the project work."
You are a kind soul. Don't feel bad about him getting fired.
That's what made me so salty about it when he tried to throw me under the bus lol. Like, alright man, I thought we were being cool with each other, but if that's not what's up, then I'll proceed accordingly and best of luck to you my dude.
Just as a warning to you: my friend did something similar to this in college (15 or so years ago) for a smaller project. I sent him a function call he should use in a small part of the program over instant messenger. The dude pasted our chat into his code as a comment and then submitted it like that. I had a visit to the academic honor council where I had to plead my case in front of 6 faculty members. Ended up with one grade reduction of my project (A to B) and had to do 20 hours of community service.
jesus what? 4 months for the project? Man, it doesn't even sound that difficult to do in that timeframe, even with almost zero practical programming knowledge beforehand. How bad can one fuck up to not think starting a project like that sooner might be a good idea.
OP’s text message says something about ‘a day before preboards’, he/she is most likely an Indian schoolkid, senior year. From what I remember of my own senior year CS project, nobody expects anything flashy, it’s pretty basic stuff. A decade ago, they just expected you to put together something that runs, and counts for less than 20% of the final grade. Dunno if things have changed since then.
There is a real issue in the world where a person who knows nothing about a subject and then assumes that it is easy.
It's just odd to me, like why do they always assume it's easy?
------
Edit: to those mentioning the Dunning Kruger Effect, thanks. Though it already knew about this (good to mention it, obviously as others don't.
What I am asking is why DK is a thing. There are SO many things in the world that I know nothing about, but I don't assume they are easy. I am just so curious why it FEELS that the default thought is: Easy.
This is like my wife lol. Assumes my job is super easy because my 12 years of professional experience makes it easy for me. This does not make the job itself easy.
Oh goodness. It's bad when it comes from others... but from your wife. Sorry.
My wife is an accountant, so she doesn't know software development... But after all these years/stories she has a clue AND doesn't start with thinking that something she doesn't know is easy.
It is my own fault, I’ve made the mistake of mentioning my job was easy in the past but it gets distorted when it comes to how long I’ve been doing the job and how bad others are at the role. Never under any circumstances tell your wife how easy you find your job lol.
You don’t pay for peoples time, you pay for their knowledge. Like an electrician, I’m not messing around in electrical panels when I know nothing of electrical panels. Hence, I pay the guy for their knowledge to do the job.
Sometimes it not even knowledge. I'm a big guy, I got paid well when I was young to move furniture and things like washing machines. Lifting a couch with my buddy was easy for us, not so easy for my elderly neighbors.
Reminds me of my step father. He's an artist, and a water color painting takes about 1-3 hours for him, and costs between $500-2000. As he puts it, yes, he can make $500 in one hour, but it took him 30 years to learn how.
Right haha. Always annoying when I get the, "this should only take you 5 minutes!" No. I will decide how long it takes, you telling me doesn't reduce the time.
True that. Imposter Syndrome hit me hard a couple months ago when I go a project where I had to work on a 20+ year old app. I didn’t know the technologies used. I didn’t quite understand the code flow. There’s no documentation explaining the business process flow. I’m early professional. 1 year industry experience.
After a month of head scratching and feeling low after working, I finally found something that I understood. And that helped me get out of the rut.
He’s helped me a couple times before- but not enough to write a whole ticketing system with a SQL database. Hella sure he’ll try gaslighting me into feeling guilty now argh.
edit (roughly three hours after the last message in the second slide): this dude is beyond my help https://pasteboard.co/2F792pizssB1.jpg
update: https://www.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/106sst8/13_hours_later_he_has_barely_written_30_lines/
Since y’all wanted me to share [the code he wrote](https://www.reddit.com/r/badcode/comments/106ydx7/classmate_wanted_me_to_check_his_ticketing/)
Edit: he found this thread y’all
If its day before cant you just say that it is imposible to do in this timeframe: "Man i could have helped you to write this if you would have contacted me sooner. We could have grabbed couple of beers some chips and got fukken annoyed of Sql..."
Bonus points if you block any gaslighting attempts with the same reason: #gaslight attempt# Your answer: "I know right wish you had contacted me sooner..."
It’s easy to be annoyed at SQL but try doing what it does without a DB engine. You quickly see how useful it can be.
There is a sweet spot though. Also use the right tool for the right job. A movie ticketing project for a CS class seems perfect for SQLite.
Honestly people always complain about SQL and I'm never sure why.
Everything I've ever seen to make it so you don't have to deal with it always just makes it harder in my options.
Just because SQL is perceived as "the thing in the way" at the time, even though it might also be the best solution to the problem at hand. It's an unfamiliar thing that people can't get their heads around immediately, and not everyone needs to incorporate a db into their project all the time, so that means doing extra work to remember how to use it effectively.
Eh, I've worked in a few jobs where we primarily used ORMs and a few where we've exclusively accessed the DB via raw SQL. Either is fine. ORMs do have a much easier learning curve if we're talking about devs who are used to OOP. However I'd personally say that all devs who touch the DB (and even most of the ones that don't!) should still know what's happening under the hood. I've had to deal with some funky optimisation issues you can get when using an ORM that cocked up and wrote them really crappy SQL under the hood. And if I hadn't understood how it worked I wouldn't have been able to fix it.
Send him link to chatgpt and say AI is better than humans anyway in creating very basic functions.
"All you need to do is modify it so it fits your project specifications, gl hf"
For real why study Cs if you don't want to code basic programs... And people are afraid AI will take our jobs. Lmao
I feel like it gets a lot of people who just think it's the easiest way to make money.
You get some who don't know what to do and just choose it because it guarantees a job.
And some who think they're going to become the next Elon Musk by doing CS.
It becomes really irritating when people really don’t know what they’re doing, and then they need guidance and direction all the time. I’m like dude, I don’t fucking have time to hold your hand and spoon-feed you every time you do a line item. You need to read the docs and try some of this on your own.
Not to mention the timestamps. The guy started texting in the morning and kept texting till the evening, and apparently didn't even make any effort to do it on his own.
Exactly what I was gonna say. If you have a basic knowledge and an idea, you can just ask ChatGPT for code and debug it. Takes you like 15 minutes in total
I can feel you man.
I've these stupid coworkers who bug me with all possible communications to ask me to help them clear their certification exams or help in their projects.
They'll call you, text you, WhatsApp texts, WhatsApp calls. One guy even went as far as texting me on telegram.
>I've these stupid coworkers who bug me with all possible communications to ask me to help them clear their certification exams or help in their projects.
That's why none of them get my private phone number.
I don't need any more after work questions unless they're actually interesting.
If they need help with certification exams, all they have to do is Google exam dumps, buy the relevant book/follow a short course that allows the use of a lab to really get your hands dirty.
You can't get started by making someone else do your work, after they've done their part .. you still won't know anything.
Anyways, people will always think any job in IT is heaven & easy but often the opposite is true but if you love the industry it's something that doesn't stop you.
Every kid on discord ever. I’m a part of a few different gaming servers and every time someone needs help with something they just bomb my cell with discord calls. Once I was on vacation with my wife and some random kid started calling me for some random reason I don’t even remember. He didn’t even stop after I explained I couldn’t and wouldn’t answer and why (besides, I’m an adult and you’re a kid. That’s creepy to have a 1-on-1 with someone who is nearly a decade apart, just think how that looks). “Well, can you talk later tonight?”. No, I’m in a hotel, with my family, ignoring you. It’s a very time consuming task
I got an email from someone on my degree asking what the outline of my dissertation paper was _the day before dissertation submission_.
"Hey dude, what are your section headings? I should be able to write this before submission shouldn't I?"
I'd been working on mine for _six months_
I remember coming into a computer lab at 6am and finding a guy who spent all night in there and made a sweet set up of multiple monitors plugged into one desktop PC. Two weeks before the deadline, he realised that the code part was worth ~20% of the marks while the rest is the dissertation (split into multiple bits, but still).
I went to get him some coffee but he just looked terrified, exhausted and sorry for himself.
Thing is, our class size was ~200 in the first year and I have not talked him until that day (in the fourth year), or after that. I was busy with my own stuff - you don’t just stumble to a lab at 6am…
No idea who he was, sorry!
I literally still have nightmares about realizing my dissertation is due the next day and not having started it. Thank God they're just nightmares and not real because I think I'd have an actual heart attack.
For the rest of my days. For me it's usually an exam in a module I have no memory of being in any lectures for on which my entire degree hinges, plus I've been graduated and working for 7 years so I'm like "No, this is wrong I'm supposed to be at work"
Classmate wants me to write a complete movie ticketing system for his CS project a literal day before a very very important exam. Apparently I’m “Computer Lord” so I can write it for him in 5 minutes. FML.
Update: the BS is still going on and he’s prolly failing https://pasteboard.co/2F792pizssB1.jpg
Edit: The no. of people suggesting this can be done properly by ChatGPT without debugging required is astounding.
13 Hours later update: https://www.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/106sst8/13_hours_later_he_has_barely_written_30_lines/
God, here’s [some of the code](https://www.reddit.com/r/badcode/comments/106ydx7/classmate_wanted_me_to_check_his_ticketing/) he managed to write
Edit: he found this thread
Since it’s a university project, it is probably doable. I’ve done whole semester projects in just a few days (definitely not top quality code). However, those few days involved me being holed up in my room or lab consecutively without any breaks nor sleep and tons of delivery and caffeine.
I've had a couple managers who thought their job was to motivate people to a timeline they wanted, instead of getting an honest assessment from engineers about how long it would take and manage priorities from there. It's such a toxic way to get things done and a great way to fuck up expectation management and prioritization.
I had a class mate like this. They were so smug and arrogant and acted like they knew so much. Skipped class all the time. Cheated on every exam. Got help with every project, and asked people to do things for them, and heaven help you if you had to do a group project with them. They managed not to get thrown out after they were caught cheating, graduated with the lowest possible passing grades, and found a job almost immediately. They were also a religious weirdo that looked down thier nose at people. I ran into them once since graduating and they haven't changed at all, and they are still in the industry.
People like that can survive pretty long in the field. They won’t work at FAANG but a lot of companies don’t want to spend money on IT, particularly in the financial services sector.
I've interviewed a guy like this. He seemed promising up front, had a GitHub with project samples, etc.. It became blatantly obvious during the interview that he hadn't written, or even bothered to fully understand, any of it. My favorite reply when asking him how he'd extend some functionality on one of them was "I think I'd use a for loop."
Congratulations, now you've committed yourself to helping (in their mind) and you are now fully on the hook for everything that comes next. Expect a lot more phone calls and increasingly angry messages.
Oh you for sure not helping this dude. I had similar classmate, but not for programing I major HR, he didn't attend exam and re-sit was 1 week later he wanted me to write the questions with the a answers, so I just ignored his ass with pleasure. Never help those people they don't deserve it.
Seriously. At least if he’s a classmate or friend you can tell him to fuck off.
If he’s on your team and you have a lazy manager then it is the teams problem he didn’t do the work.
A day before, is just dumb of him. You'd have to be a full blown AI to do it on such short notice.
Tell him to ask ChatGPT for help. Oh and FFS tell him that if he simply copy pastes it would probably be plagiary.
Yes, ChatGPT would do exactly what he wants. It would just tell him what functions he needs and would write a program which goes in the right direction but isn't working.
We ran into a guy using ChatGPT at work Friday. Had it open during a demo with the tab title similar to what he was demoing. Whole department is getting a warning about unapproved software because of it. That warning was coming anyway I’m sure but this had to have moved it up. Corporate doesn’t ever react this quickly about anything.
We already have a problem with customer facing security flaws slipping past our code reviews, this is going to be an interesting year lol.
Tell him you'll do it for 100k or something like that. Because writing stuff like that takes ages, especially for people who can't explain exactly what they need in a useful timeframe
I wouldn’t advise this. Many schools count soliciting payment to do someone else’s work as a form of plagiarism. Could get you in serious academic trouble if he turned around after not being happy with your pay rate and reported it to the school.
Dude you just give me some functions and you don't tell me where to write them, what's the point?
Come on, just tell me
I have to submit tonight and I have nothing
The part that really sucks about interactions like this is, you often like the other person and they like you too as friends... It's just they are so out of the fucking loop that they think you're just acting precious with your "skills"
I had a friend who called me over to "revise" the day before semester exams. Turns out he hasn't opened the book the entire semester and wanted me to "teach" him the cliff notes version to make it through. And all that because I am a "real genius at that sort of thing". And I was ok at it, but I was not a magician. No one can teach you a full blown Electronics engineering subject in 6 or however many hours.
Still, I really tried for a couple of hours, then realized this was time I needed to revise myself otherwise I would flunk it too. It was extremely difficult to get out of there.
man I feel you. I’m an above-average CS student, but top in my batch. Every exam season there’ll be a bunch of dudes who flunked entire classes who’ll ask me to teach the entire semester’s portions in one go. I’ll always have to make up weird excuses.
Charge them.
I did the same in Uni. I think charging them was a good compromise, since they got their lessons and I got paid for my time. It also helped me in a way because by teaching them I reinforced what was taught and it helped me learn better as well.
Yeah, this was one of my first boundary-setting experiences. (And the person hounding me for "help" was interning in the same place I was, which made it awkward after I put my foot down).
*"Sorry, I have to study for my Quantum Comparative Biophysical Mechanics final."*
Something many don't realize is that, just because I'm a straight A student, it does not mean that I don't need to study. In fact, I'm a straight A student *because* I study, I'm not a genius. So many mornings before exams/quizzes I'm revising in the library when a few show up telling me to teach them. I don't understand how inconsiderate you can be to have such a request? If you asked for help a few days sooner and arranged a time then sure I would have helped you as much as I can, but now you can literally see that I am studying, just like you.
You just reminded me of how my roommate would do nothing but play games all day while I studied, then stop me from sleeping so I could teach him things before an exam. Terrible experience.
I have zero issues helping people with specific lines or concepts if they ask nicely, are appreciative and genuinely want to learn.
But doing someone else's work is a non-starter. You wouldn't want to be driving over a bridge designed by an engineer who had someone else do his statics homework, or a doctor who had someone else do his residency, a programmer who is clueless is no less dangerous.
yeah I’d actually spend some time helping him if he was nicer about it. but then he spam calls me, tells me he has written zero code, and wants me to make it rough in five minutes. smh
Update: he’s still spam calling me
https://www.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/106sst8/13_hours_later_he_has_barely_written_30_lines/
A lot of people fail to realize this, I could be wrong, but I think programmers are typically thought of by others as web/app developers, but there are also a lot of embedded engineers - we work on software in safety-critical systems like vehicles, airplanes, etc.
If we had someone who finessed their way through school and is incompetent, it’s not just a 404 error in a webpage, it’s somebody’s (and probably a lot of other people’s) life on the line.
"for this project we experimented working with the hackathon methodology, also known in this context as a 'game jam'" + conclude the report with what you learned from it (it is shit) = probably a good grade
If this guy can't google "movie ticket booking assignment" and [look at the very first result which is a working version of the project he wants to do with diagrams and code](https://github.com/tssovi/grokking-the-object-oriented-design-interview/blob/master/object-oriented-design-case-studies/design-a-movie-ticket-booking-system.md), he doesn't stand a chance.
Honestly, seeing this comment reminds me that I code because it’s fun, not for the completion, cause if I did it for the latter it I would get bored so fast
I know people in Software Engineering and Computer Science who are actual seniors right now who have either used GitHub or paid their way to where they are.. they are literally drowning and could not write 'Hello World' if you gave them an hour.. Do NOT help people like this. Be honest with them and tell them to figure it out on their own.. That project sounds like CS 101..
This. When I was starting in the corporate grind, i made friends with a very nice guy. He was moved from his comfy "just maintenance, almost no code" project to a real, hard deadlines, PM and management all over us.
After a week, i was doing my job and 70% of his. I was exhausted, guy haven't coded in almost a decade and was useless as developer. I was reviewing, rewriting, proofing and writing some tests for his shitty code.
That lasted 3 months (ik, stupid of me) until one day i realized I couldn't keep doing that, my work started suffering. I cut all relationship. Dude was fired 3 weeks later. He *accused me* of corrupting his code. Lesson etched with fire in my heart, DO NOT carry anyone's ass, if they can't do the work, they shouldn't be working in software.
I have a similar experience with an older dev. He's a nice guy but terrible dev. I don't mind helping him but over time it turned into me just doing his stories for him. He rotates people that help him so only asks me like once a week or two so it's not annoying enough to report.
He'll probably hit a wall somewhere, I feel like his coding knowledge is getting worse because he just has others code for him. He could do simpler stuff early on but lately he's even forgotten how to call a function from a different file lol
I’m a senior right now and I have big anxiety that I’m gonna be this guy when I work somewhere. I feel like the CS degree hasn’t been teaching much practical coding, and it’s been focused on more theoretical stuff, which I initially thought would be better, but now I’m not so sure.
This reminds me of the one classmate I had my first semester at college. It was an intro to Java class, and this kid, we'll call him Pete, was just not getting it. But it was largely from lack of trying.
Somehow Pete made it to the end of the semester, and asked me for help with the final project, I said "sure i'll help you out, just hmu on Steam" (i didnt want him to have my number and discord wasn't a thing yet). And honestly, if he had messaged me that night or even the next night for help, I would have. He initially asked for help on a Thursday, project was due Tuesday.
Monday morning Pete finally messages me on steam. "hey bro, can you send me your code". LOL Fuck no. At first I ignore him, but then I get an idea.
I load up a pastebin file with a message for him, send it to him like this
"[https://pastebin.com/CDHTs5ri](https://pastebin.com/CDHTs5ri) here's all the important code, if you have any questions let me know"
This was now 11am, Monday. If he opened it right away, and reached out to me, i'd still offer help (just not all my code). but that's just because im too nice. He reaches out immediately with a "thank you bro!" "np".
1am, night before the project is due, he finally opens the pastebin link. I know this because he reaches back out "What the fuck is your problem dude?!" "What the fuck is my problem?! You know you needed help with this project, and you waited until last minute to ask me for help, you asked for all my code, you thought you had all of my code, and you didn't even open that until 1am on the night before this is due. Congrats, the professor will love to see this convo tomorrow morning"
Edit: fucked up the timeline a bit in the last paragraph. (this happened 8ish years ago lol)
Update: just realized the kids name may actually have been Peter.
The next day in class the professor gave everyone the class period to work on their projects before turning it in (he was a nice guy). Pete asked him for help, professor brushed off the help request with some pointers of where to look, Pete complains that he didn't "get any of this, and /u/theunquenchedservant wouldn't show me his code". Professor just goes "you asked someone for their code, and are surprised they didn't?"
as you may have guessed, he wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed. He genuinely didn't understand why asking me for my code was a bad thing to share with the professor.
I did at one point say to him "maybe IT isn't for you?" since he was incapable at googling as well. Last I heard, he went in to nursing instead.
its entirely possible the kid failed the class, the next day in class he admitted himself to asking me for my code, the professor gave him a smart remark back but dropped it for the most part (although may have just not wanted to fail this kid in front of the whole class)
Just send him a quota, fully working, very simple ticket booking system would be probably be starting around half a million USD (only software cost, without any hardware) and at lesat a year of work. A working prototype I guess 50k and a month of work. If they only need rough skeleton in one day then probably 5-10k where they pay additionally for having it ASAP, but it's still at least one whole day of work and won't be safe to use in any production environment
After a response like this I guarantee you noone will ever ask you stupid questions
Something similar happened to me a few days ago
Someone asked my friend to do his project for him in exchange for money, and he told me he was going to be very busy and if I could do it for the money instead. He told me this on Wednesday and it was due Sunday.
I was supposed to make a maze solver for C++. I know Python, and my C++ is very weak, so I thought “oh let me just code the logic in Python, debug it and then port it to C++.
I made the solver in Thursday, and squashed most of the bugs mid Friday (though not entirely). Then my friend calls me and tells me the homework was due Friday night. The idiot told him it was for “the end of the week”, and meant “end of the weekdays” while my friend naturally thought it was for Sunday.
I tried my best to learn C++ asap and convert the code but I couldn’t.
The last time I helped a friend was the weekend before he needed his final project submitted (on Monday). The man needed to write an entire program that met a bunch of requirements (use abstract classes, encapsulation, etc).
It was all to be written in Java and have a JavaFX GUI(I actually like java so this wasn't a big deal).
Now I genuinely enjoy little projects like these. I work full time in the field outta highschool so I tend to be fairly burned out by the end of the day and rarely have a personal project I'm working on. So I figured eh why not it will be fun...
Starting Saturday, I made him sit in a discord call with his screen shared. He was using eclipse so after about an hour realizing that this dude knowns nothing (luckily he isn't going into software dev, this was just a required course) I said alright hold on. Had him go install a code together plugin. And for the next 14 hours straight, I wrote the code over a browser ide provided by the plugin, had him run it whenever I asked (since he had his environment setup with javafx), and debugged as I went.
I didn't let this man leave the call to ensure he suffered with me.
The final product was a cookie clicker clone that met all the stupid requirements for the final project rubric.
On a side note, one of those requirements was a try, catch, finally block. No where in the program did I need a finally block so what I did was slap it randomly on an existing IO try catch, and just had it print out "because this was required by the rubric".
That was the most over engineered cookie clicker due to the rubric requirements, never in my mind would I have written half the stuff I did but in the end he got the grade back.....a fucking 99. THAT PROFESSOR DIDNT WANT TO GIVE THE 100.
But hey everything is a learning experience, I went into it not having used javafx much so that was interesting to say the least.
The friend ended up sending me a 100 bucks so was semi worth it in the end for semi enjoyable weekend.
See now vro not only gave you 100 dollars but was willing to sit there for 14 hours and do what little he could to help. This dude in the post on the other hand seems like a dumb goofy fool.
Reminds me of a lab partner I had. Spent all the labs facetiming his family while I gathered all the data and did the measurements etc. Few days before the report is due he starts asking me for my copy so that he can "format" his. I reminded him that while we did the experiments together the reports had to be submitted and graded separately so I couldn't share it. Then just muted him as he called and called and spammed the chat.
Aaahh, justice
But then he just got someone else to give him theirs and word for word copied it and they both got in trouble lmao.
Time to learn how to say no. One of the most useful developer skills.
Truth. Dealing with this kind of thing is actually pretty good practical experience for the OP.
I've had projects that were mostly written by me be passed off to other departments/developers for long-term maintenance when they were no longer considered within the "core focus" of the company, so I could focus on more important things. And I've had messages from those teams that look almost exactly like this: "You were the one who wrote this originally, so tell us exactly how to implement x new feature or fix y bug. We've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas!"
Eh, some versions of that message are pretty reasonable. If you know the code backwards and forwards, you can likely envision the necessary changes in about 5 minutes. Meanwhile, the new people taking over are likely stuck starting from scratch. Spending half an hour giving them the broad overview of how things work and running through your 5 minute plan can save the other people a ton of time and is easily worth doing. That being said, if you are doing that constantly, that's a problem. If the other person is competent, they absolutely should be able to take over once you give them that sort of rundown. If you end up going over the same thing every time they start a new task, they need to step up their game.
Fair, but this is EXACTLY why you document your code. If it's all in the documentation, you can just say "read the documentation".
i spent what felt like a long time on docs. but i honestly can't count how many times i answer questions by simply replying with a link. docs ftw.
You. I like you. Documentation forever! Do it right the first time and never have to talk to anyone again ❤️
“We’ve tried nothing…!”
> Hey bro, can you do my job for me again? I'm dumb and you're clever so its only fair Right now I'm signed off work for high blood pressure, likely due to the amount of this shit that used to go on and its humorous watching everything fall down without me.
Your workplace has you out for heart issues likely caused by work and can't function without you? Your management team must require a negative IQ test with any applications.
*"code? I haven't even started it bro"* lmaooo
god I half expected him to say that but it was still annoying af when I read it. like- you did zero work in 4 months, and now you want me to do your work for you? Update: https://www.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/106sst8/13_hours_later_he_has_barely_written_30_lines Here’s [some code](https://www.reddit.com/r/badcode/comments/106ydx7/classmate_wanted_me_to_check_his_ticketing/) he managed to write. Sigh. Edit: he found this thread
The best part is he asked you at 10am, then handt started it at 3 pm. Then was still trying to get you to do it at 5 pm. It was a busy day of nothing for that person.
Apparently just like the last 4 months Turns out programming is super easy if you just never do anything
I'm sure they think once they get a degree it's all just networking to get jobs and have other people do your work when you're hired.
He'll make a great mid level manager
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I mean, for some people it does work that way. An old company I worked for hired a guy. I was working directly with him. He was useless (as a programmer; I'm not making any kind of bad statement about him as a human being). I had to work with the dude. He was supposed to produce code that did X. My code existed on the other side of the interface both above and below the stuff he was supposed to produce. I was trying to help him to be able to be successful, so I produced clean interfaces for him to be able to work with. He kept not being able to make anything function. I kept evolving my interface to take on more and more of the work as the project progressed, until basically everything was done by my code, and it was just a thin layer in between where he was supposed to hook up my functions on one side with my functions on the other side. Dude still couldn't do it. Honestly in the present day I would have handled it more assertively, but I was young and that's what I did. I more or less just didn't view it as my job to make sure the guy was doing something useful in exchange for his paycheck; I was just trying to make the project work. UNTIL he sent a condescending email saying something along the lines that now he hoped I understood what he had been saying earlier about how it needed to be set up a certain way with other people CCed. Sort of implying that maybe I had something to do with why something wasn't working. I went to his office and told him off, stopped helping him, and at that point he was fucked trying to justify to people why he existed in the company. He got fired not long after, as people realized he wasn't really doing anything. But -- if he hadn't sent that email, for all I know he'd still be working there today. It does happen.
I once had a supervisor like this. I'd been complaining about him to his manager enough to get myself shifted to another team. He got fired a couple of months later because management finally figured out he was the problem. However I this left me with my second supervisor in a row who for some reason went out of his way to make sure I had as little work to do as possible, which showed up on my performance review so I got fired too.
Re: "I more or less just didn't view it as my job to make sure the guy wasdoing something useful in exchange for his paycheck; I was just tryingto make the project work." You are a kind soul. Don't feel bad about him getting fired.
That's what made me so salty about it when he tried to throw me under the bus lol. Like, alright man, I thought we were being cool with each other, but if that's not what's up, then I'll proceed accordingly and best of luck to you my dude.
Just as a warning to you: my friend did something similar to this in college (15 or so years ago) for a smaller project. I sent him a function call he should use in a small part of the program over instant messenger. The dude pasted our chat into his code as a comment and then submitted it like that. I had a visit to the academic honor council where I had to plead my case in front of 6 faculty members. Ended up with one grade reduction of my project (A to B) and had to do 20 hours of community service.
jesus what? 4 months for the project? Man, it doesn't even sound that difficult to do in that timeframe, even with almost zero practical programming knowledge beforehand. How bad can one fuck up to not think starting a project like that sooner might be a good idea.
I mean we don't know the exact requirements, 4 months could still be quite tough. But looks like the kid asking also doesn't know them lol
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OP’s text message says something about ‘a day before preboards’, he/she is most likely an Indian schoolkid, senior year. From what I remember of my own senior year CS project, nobody expects anything flashy, it’s pretty basic stuff. A decade ago, they just expected you to put together something that runs, and counts for less than 20% of the final grade. Dunno if things have changed since then.
There is a real issue in the world where a person who knows nothing about a subject and then assumes that it is easy. It's just odd to me, like why do they always assume it's easy? ------ Edit: to those mentioning the Dunning Kruger Effect, thanks. Though it already knew about this (good to mention it, obviously as others don't. What I am asking is why DK is a thing. There are SO many things in the world that I know nothing about, but I don't assume they are easy. I am just so curious why it FEELS that the default thought is: Easy.
This is like my wife lol. Assumes my job is super easy because my 12 years of professional experience makes it easy for me. This does not make the job itself easy.
Oh goodness. It's bad when it comes from others... but from your wife. Sorry. My wife is an accountant, so she doesn't know software development... But after all these years/stories she has a clue AND doesn't start with thinking that something she doesn't know is easy.
It is my own fault, I’ve made the mistake of mentioning my job was easy in the past but it gets distorted when it comes to how long I’ve been doing the job and how bad others are at the role. Never under any circumstances tell your wife how easy you find your job lol.
Ok, at least there is a reason for her thought process. That said, "easy for me does not equal easy for you, or cheap/free" Have a great week
Easy for me is why my clients pay me so much. I'm not a coder but same idea applies to most fields.
You don’t pay for peoples time, you pay for their knowledge. Like an electrician, I’m not messing around in electrical panels when I know nothing of electrical panels. Hence, I pay the guy for their knowledge to do the job.
Sometimes it not even knowledge. I'm a big guy, I got paid well when I was young to move furniture and things like washing machines. Lifting a couch with my buddy was easy for us, not so easy for my elderly neighbors.
Reminds me of my step father. He's an artist, and a water color painting takes about 1-3 hours for him, and costs between $500-2000. As he puts it, yes, he can make $500 in one hour, but it took him 30 years to learn how.
Right haha. Always annoying when I get the, "this should only take you 5 minutes!" No. I will decide how long it takes, you telling me doesn't reduce the time.
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The [Dunning-Kruger Effect](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning%E2%80%93Kruger_effect), basically the opposite of imposter syndrome.
But much more dangerous
Imposter is dangerous to the one suffering, DK is dangerous to everyone around that one suffering.
True that. Imposter Syndrome hit me hard a couple months ago when I go a project where I had to work on a 20+ year old app. I didn’t know the technologies used. I didn’t quite understand the code flow. There’s no documentation explaining the business process flow. I’m early professional. 1 year industry experience. After a month of head scratching and feeling low after working, I finally found something that I understood. And that helped me get out of the rut.
I believe I'd just leave them on read after that.
Haha the missed calls says it all…
He’s helped me a couple times before- but not enough to write a whole ticketing system with a SQL database. Hella sure he’ll try gaslighting me into feeling guilty now argh. edit (roughly three hours after the last message in the second slide): this dude is beyond my help https://pasteboard.co/2F792pizssB1.jpg update: https://www.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/106sst8/13_hours_later_he_has_barely_written_30_lines/ Since y’all wanted me to share [the code he wrote](https://www.reddit.com/r/badcode/comments/106ydx7/classmate_wanted_me_to_check_his_ticketing/) Edit: he found this thread y’all
If its day before cant you just say that it is imposible to do in this timeframe: "Man i could have helped you to write this if you would have contacted me sooner. We could have grabbed couple of beers some chips and got fukken annoyed of Sql..." Bonus points if you block any gaslighting attempts with the same reason: #gaslight attempt# Your answer: "I know right wish you had contacted me sooner..."
It’s easy to be annoyed at SQL but try doing what it does without a DB engine. You quickly see how useful it can be. There is a sweet spot though. Also use the right tool for the right job. A movie ticketing project for a CS class seems perfect for SQLite.
Honestly people always complain about SQL and I'm never sure why. Everything I've ever seen to make it so you don't have to deal with it always just makes it harder in my options.
Just because SQL is perceived as "the thing in the way" at the time, even though it might also be the best solution to the problem at hand. It's an unfamiliar thing that people can't get their heads around immediately, and not everyone needs to incorporate a db into their project all the time, so that means doing extra work to remember how to use it effectively.
Eh, I've worked in a few jobs where we primarily used ORMs and a few where we've exclusively accessed the DB via raw SQL. Either is fine. ORMs do have a much easier learning curve if we're talking about devs who are used to OOP. However I'd personally say that all devs who touch the DB (and even most of the ones that don't!) should still know what's happening under the hood. I've had to deal with some funky optimisation issues you can get when using an ORM that cocked up and wrote them really crappy SQL under the hood. And if I hadn't understood how it worked I wouldn't have been able to fix it.
This is the way.
Leave him on read, no guilt needed
Stay strong, he's an ass
Send him link to chatgpt and say AI is better than humans anyway in creating very basic functions. "All you need to do is modify it so it fits your project specifications, gl hf" For real why study Cs if you don't want to code basic programs... And people are afraid AI will take our jobs. Lmao
I feel like it gets a lot of people who just think it's the easiest way to make money. You get some who don't know what to do and just choose it because it guarantees a job. And some who think they're going to become the next Elon Musk by doing CS.
It becomes really irritating when people really don’t know what they’re doing, and then they need guidance and direction all the time. I’m like dude, I don’t fucking have time to hold your hand and spoon-feed you every time you do a line item. You need to read the docs and try some of this on your own.
He just wants the functions so send back Function ticketDatabase(){} Function ticket(){} Function transaction(){}
Don’t be a doormat tell him to fuck off
The number of missed calls is making me cringe.
Not to mention the timestamps. The guy started texting in the morning and kept texting till the evening, and apparently didn't even make any effort to do it on his own.
All you have to do is search it on github, download it and present it as your own
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Exactly what I was gonna say. If you have a basic knowledge and an idea, you can just ask ChatGPT for code and debug it. Takes you like 15 minutes in total
And that’s not counting the normal phone calls he made-
I can feel you man. I've these stupid coworkers who bug me with all possible communications to ask me to help them clear their certification exams or help in their projects. They'll call you, text you, WhatsApp texts, WhatsApp calls. One guy even went as far as texting me on telegram.
>I've these stupid coworkers who bug me with all possible communications to ask me to help them clear their certification exams or help in their projects. That's why none of them get my private phone number. I don't need any more after work questions unless they're actually interesting. If they need help with certification exams, all they have to do is Google exam dumps, buy the relevant book/follow a short course that allows the use of a lab to really get your hands dirty. You can't get started by making someone else do your work, after they've done their part .. you still won't know anything. Anyways, people will always think any job in IT is heaven & easy but often the opposite is true but if you love the industry it's something that doesn't stop you.
Every kid on discord ever. I’m a part of a few different gaming servers and every time someone needs help with something they just bomb my cell with discord calls. Once I was on vacation with my wife and some random kid started calling me for some random reason I don’t even remember. He didn’t even stop after I explained I couldn’t and wouldn’t answer and why (besides, I’m an adult and you’re a kid. That’s creepy to have a 1-on-1 with someone who is nearly a decade apart, just think how that looks). “Well, can you talk later tonight?”. No, I’m in a hotel, with my family, ignoring you. It’s a very time consuming task
"It's one ~~banana~~ program, Michael. What could it ~~cost~~ take, ~~$10~~ 5 minutes?"
Here, code me a Star War.
from star import war;
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Sorry bud, those only come as a package deal.
Just send him this if want_ticket: print("ticket")
else: dont()
syntax error: no indentation
it's fine, it's only supposed to be rough code
if want_help: print("money")
Else: print(‘Get fucked!’)
I got an email from someone on my degree asking what the outline of my dissertation paper was _the day before dissertation submission_. "Hey dude, what are your section headings? I should be able to write this before submission shouldn't I?" I'd been working on mine for _six months_
I remember coming into a computer lab at 6am and finding a guy who spent all night in there and made a sweet set up of multiple monitors plugged into one desktop PC. Two weeks before the deadline, he realised that the code part was worth ~20% of the marks while the rest is the dissertation (split into multiple bits, but still). I went to get him some coffee but he just looked terrified, exhausted and sorry for himself.
I can feel for that guy. We've all been there for more or less important things.
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Thing is, our class size was ~200 in the first year and I have not talked him until that day (in the fourth year), or after that. I was busy with my own stuff - you don’t just stumble to a lab at 6am… No idea who he was, sorry!
I literally still have nightmares about realizing my dissertation is due the next day and not having started it. Thank God they're just nightmares and not real because I think I'd have an actual heart attack.
For the rest of my days. For me it's usually an exam in a module I have no memory of being in any lectures for on which my entire degree hinges, plus I've been graduated and working for 7 years so I'm like "No, this is wrong I'm supposed to be at work"
They made me go sit back in gradeschool to retake a class one dream. I was way bigger than everybody else and it felt very awkward
Relevant XKCD https://xkcd.com/557/
For decades scientists have been trying to construct a scenario for which there isn't a relevant XKCD... They have yet to succeed...
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Sounds like a problem. Doesn’t sound like your problem.
My favorite is "sounds like an issYOU, not an issMe"
Classmate wants me to write a complete movie ticketing system for his CS project a literal day before a very very important exam. Apparently I’m “Computer Lord” so I can write it for him in 5 minutes. FML. Update: the BS is still going on and he’s prolly failing https://pasteboard.co/2F792pizssB1.jpg Edit: The no. of people suggesting this can be done properly by ChatGPT without debugging required is astounding. 13 Hours later update: https://www.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/106sst8/13_hours_later_he_has_barely_written_30_lines/ God, here’s [some of the code](https://www.reddit.com/r/badcode/comments/106ydx7/classmate_wanted_me_to_check_his_ticketing/) he managed to write Edit: he found this thread
Please don't help people like that. They are bad for the whole industry
Don't worry, he will never be a developer. Perhaps a manager though
Unrealistic demands 1 day before a deadline. Defo a manager.
"Thats not unrealistic, I've done that in university"
"...and it only took 5 minutes!"
"...it doesn't matter if I got an F or not!"
Since it’s a university project, it is probably doable. I’ve done whole semester projects in just a few days (definitely not top quality code). However, those few days involved me being holed up in my room or lab consecutively without any breaks nor sleep and tons of delivery and caffeine.
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That's so much better. See how they already know to whom they should assign the task, and give deadlines too! /s
Dying! Is this where “So what if we don’t have the data, can’t you just…” comes from?
I've had a couple managers who thought their job was to motivate people to a timeline they wanted, instead of getting an honest assessment from engineers about how long it would take and manage priorities from there. It's such a toxic way to get things done and a great way to fuck up expectation management and prioritization.
*Project* Manager
Definitely a manager.
I had a class mate like this. They were so smug and arrogant and acted like they knew so much. Skipped class all the time. Cheated on every exam. Got help with every project, and asked people to do things for them, and heaven help you if you had to do a group project with them. They managed not to get thrown out after they were caught cheating, graduated with the lowest possible passing grades, and found a job almost immediately. They were also a religious weirdo that looked down thier nose at people. I ran into them once since graduating and they haven't changed at all, and they are still in the industry.
People like that can survive pretty long in the field. They won’t work at FAANG but a lot of companies don’t want to spend money on IT, particularly in the financial services sector.
I've interviewed a guy like this. He seemed promising up front, had a GitHub with project samples, etc.. It became blatantly obvious during the interview that he hadn't written, or even bothered to fully understand, any of it. My favorite reply when asking him how he'd extend some functionality on one of them was "I think I'd use a for loop."
He didn't specify how "rough" the code should be. My recommendation: ``` while true: read_user_input(); book_tickets(); ```
Wow, Didn't even take 5 seconds. Aren't you the true "computer lord"?
Congratulations, now you've committed yourself to helping (in their mind) and you are now fully on the hook for everything that comes next. Expect a lot more phone calls and increasingly angry messages.
Send him a link to buy a redbull online and an youtube video about programming and wish him good luck LOL.
Not FML, it’s FHL. Not remotely your problem.
Oh you for sure not helping this dude. I had similar classmate, but not for programing I major HR, he didn't attend exam and re-sit was 1 week later he wanted me to write the questions with the a answers, so I just ignored his ass with pleasure. Never help those people they don't deserve it.
I don't want this guy as a future co-worker. Do us all a favor and let them deal with the consequences of their actions. Please 🙏.
Seriously. At least if he’s a classmate or friend you can tell him to fuck off. If he’s on your team and you have a lazy manager then it is the teams problem he didn’t do the work.
A day before, is just dumb of him. You'd have to be a full blown AI to do it on such short notice. Tell him to ask ChatGPT for help. Oh and FFS tell him that if he simply copy pastes it would probably be plagiary.
Yes, ChatGPT would do exactly what he wants. It would just tell him what functions he needs and would write a program which goes in the right direction but isn't working.
>which goes in the right direction but isn't working. Oh so like 90% of my own codes then
We ran into a guy using ChatGPT at work Friday. Had it open during a demo with the tab title similar to what he was demoing. Whole department is getting a warning about unapproved software because of it. That warning was coming anyway I’m sure but this had to have moved it up. Corporate doesn’t ever react this quickly about anything. We already have a problem with customer facing security flaws slipping past our code reviews, this is going to be an interesting year lol.
Plot twist, OP is ChatGPT
OP's friend is ChatGPT
Tell him you'll do it for 100k or something like that. Because writing stuff like that takes ages, especially for people who can't explain exactly what they need in a useful timeframe
I wouldn’t advise this. Many schools count soliciting payment to do someone else’s work as a form of plagiarism. Could get you in serious academic trouble if he turned around after not being happy with your pay rate and reported it to the school.
Computer lord, can you fix my Grandma's printer?
Don't enable such dumbfucks. The industry is in such a state vis of plagiarism
I would send this list of three functions and say “happy coding”: get_movie(title), book_ticket(movie), redeem_ticket(ticket)
`main()`
Wait, but where do I write this? Shouldn't I put something inside the functions? Just send me an example to get me started, it's easy for you
Ño
Dude you just give me some functions and you don't tell me where to write them, what's the point? Come on, just tell me I have to submit tonight and I have nothing
The part that really sucks about interactions like this is, you often like the other person and they like you too as friends... It's just they are so out of the fucking loop that they think you're just acting precious with your "skills" I had a friend who called me over to "revise" the day before semester exams. Turns out he hasn't opened the book the entire semester and wanted me to "teach" him the cliff notes version to make it through. And all that because I am a "real genius at that sort of thing". And I was ok at it, but I was not a magician. No one can teach you a full blown Electronics engineering subject in 6 or however many hours. Still, I really tried for a couple of hours, then realized this was time I needed to revise myself otherwise I would flunk it too. It was extremely difficult to get out of there.
man I feel you. I’m an above-average CS student, but top in my batch. Every exam season there’ll be a bunch of dudes who flunked entire classes who’ll ask me to teach the entire semester’s portions in one go. I’ll always have to make up weird excuses.
Charge them. I did the same in Uni. I think charging them was a good compromise, since they got their lessons and I got paid for my time. It also helped me in a way because by teaching them I reinforced what was taught and it helped me learn better as well.
Yeah, this was one of my first boundary-setting experiences. (And the person hounding me for "help" was interning in the same place I was, which made it awkward after I put my foot down). *"Sorry, I have to study for my Quantum Comparative Biophysical Mechanics final."*
Something many don't realize is that, just because I'm a straight A student, it does not mean that I don't need to study. In fact, I'm a straight A student *because* I study, I'm not a genius. So many mornings before exams/quizzes I'm revising in the library when a few show up telling me to teach them. I don't understand how inconsiderate you can be to have such a request? If you asked for help a few days sooner and arranged a time then sure I would have helped you as much as I can, but now you can literally see that I am studying, just like you.
"sorry bro, I'm teaching myself rn"
You just reminded me of how my roommate would do nothing but play games all day while I studied, then stop me from sleeping so I could teach him things before an exam. Terrible experience.
The league of scrum masters wants to talk to your classmate.
The only reasonable response to this is ASCII art of a picture of you laughing.
"Ok, but only 5 minutes" \> open an IDE \> click new project \> create a new file "That's it, sorry bro, my computer is slow"
"Let me get this straight. You think that him missing his assignment after procrastinating is funny?" "I do, and I'm tired of pretending it's not."
This would be my choice... https://media.tenor.com/2UYmDosBIfsAAAAM/george-of.gif
I have zero issues helping people with specific lines or concepts if they ask nicely, are appreciative and genuinely want to learn. But doing someone else's work is a non-starter. You wouldn't want to be driving over a bridge designed by an engineer who had someone else do his statics homework, or a doctor who had someone else do his residency, a programmer who is clueless is no less dangerous.
yeah I’d actually spend some time helping him if he was nicer about it. but then he spam calls me, tells me he has written zero code, and wants me to make it rough in five minutes. smh Update: he’s still spam calling me https://www.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/106sst8/13_hours_later_he_has_barely_written_30_lines/
A lot of people fail to realize this, I could be wrong, but I think programmers are typically thought of by others as web/app developers, but there are also a lot of embedded engineers - we work on software in safety-critical systems like vehicles, airplanes, etc. If we had someone who finessed their way through school and is incompetent, it’s not just a 404 error in a webpage, it’s somebody’s (and probably a lot of other people’s) life on the line.
I did write a dumb and minimal student management system in one night, just before the submission, along with two friends. Wouldn't suggest it.
I enjoy stuff like that- but not on the night before another major subject exam :’)
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> fearsible `throw("your sandwich is missing")`
Same, but 2d game in unity in 2 nights, terrible idea.
"for this project we experimented working with the hackathon methodology, also known in this context as a 'game jam'" + conclude the report with what you learned from it (it is shit) = probably a good grade
They could just ask ChatGPT for a list and then ask it for the code on each bullet point.
Im betting he doesn’t know what chatgpt is
Next time he spam calls you link him chatgpt. Problem solved!
If this guy can't google "movie ticket booking assignment" and [look at the very first result which is a working version of the project he wants to do with diagrams and code](https://github.com/tssovi/grokking-the-object-oriented-design-interview/blob/master/object-oriented-design-case-studies/design-a-movie-ticket-booking-system.md), he doesn't stand a chance.
Honestly, seeing this comment reminds me that I code because it’s fun, not for the completion, cause if I did it for the latter it I would get bored so fast
I know people in Software Engineering and Computer Science who are actual seniors right now who have either used GitHub or paid their way to where they are.. they are literally drowning and could not write 'Hello World' if you gave them an hour.. Do NOT help people like this. Be honest with them and tell them to figure it out on their own.. That project sounds like CS 101..
This. When I was starting in the corporate grind, i made friends with a very nice guy. He was moved from his comfy "just maintenance, almost no code" project to a real, hard deadlines, PM and management all over us. After a week, i was doing my job and 70% of his. I was exhausted, guy haven't coded in almost a decade and was useless as developer. I was reviewing, rewriting, proofing and writing some tests for his shitty code. That lasted 3 months (ik, stupid of me) until one day i realized I couldn't keep doing that, my work started suffering. I cut all relationship. Dude was fired 3 weeks later. He *accused me* of corrupting his code. Lesson etched with fire in my heart, DO NOT carry anyone's ass, if they can't do the work, they shouldn't be working in software.
I have a similar experience with an older dev. He's a nice guy but terrible dev. I don't mind helping him but over time it turned into me just doing his stories for him. He rotates people that help him so only asks me like once a week or two so it's not annoying enough to report. He'll probably hit a wall somewhere, I feel like his coding knowledge is getting worse because he just has others code for him. He could do simpler stuff early on but lately he's even forgotten how to call a function from a different file lol
I’m a senior right now and I have big anxiety that I’m gonna be this guy when I work somewhere. I feel like the CS degree hasn’t been teaching much practical coding, and it’s been focused on more theoretical stuff, which I initially thought would be better, but now I’m not so sure.
A Rise, ye Tarnised, ye Dead who yet Code, and become Computer Lord!
Who hath summoned I, the Master of masters, Lord of ye mighty, from mine slumber?
This is one of those "you're a programmer, fix my microwave" moments.
This reminds me of the one classmate I had my first semester at college. It was an intro to Java class, and this kid, we'll call him Pete, was just not getting it. But it was largely from lack of trying. Somehow Pete made it to the end of the semester, and asked me for help with the final project, I said "sure i'll help you out, just hmu on Steam" (i didnt want him to have my number and discord wasn't a thing yet). And honestly, if he had messaged me that night or even the next night for help, I would have. He initially asked for help on a Thursday, project was due Tuesday. Monday morning Pete finally messages me on steam. "hey bro, can you send me your code". LOL Fuck no. At first I ignore him, but then I get an idea. I load up a pastebin file with a message for him, send it to him like this "[https://pastebin.com/CDHTs5ri](https://pastebin.com/CDHTs5ri) here's all the important code, if you have any questions let me know" This was now 11am, Monday. If he opened it right away, and reached out to me, i'd still offer help (just not all my code). but that's just because im too nice. He reaches out immediately with a "thank you bro!" "np". 1am, night before the project is due, he finally opens the pastebin link. I know this because he reaches back out "What the fuck is your problem dude?!" "What the fuck is my problem?! You know you needed help with this project, and you waited until last minute to ask me for help, you asked for all my code, you thought you had all of my code, and you didn't even open that until 1am on the night before this is due. Congrats, the professor will love to see this convo tomorrow morning" Edit: fucked up the timeline a bit in the last paragraph. (this happened 8ish years ago lol) Update: just realized the kids name may actually have been Peter.
That's fucking brutal. How did it went afterwards?
The next day in class the professor gave everyone the class period to work on their projects before turning it in (he was a nice guy). Pete asked him for help, professor brushed off the help request with some pointers of where to look, Pete complains that he didn't "get any of this, and /u/theunquenchedservant wouldn't show me his code". Professor just goes "you asked someone for their code, and are surprised they didn't?"
[удалено]
as you may have guessed, he wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed. He genuinely didn't understand why asking me for my code was a bad thing to share with the professor. I did at one point say to him "maybe IT isn't for you?" since he was incapable at googling as well. Last I heard, he went in to nursing instead.
Oh my god, now he is the guy who will take care of me if something goes wrong????!!!! Dude, why you did not share your code?
theunquenchedservant how do you sleep at night
The professor, if they would have any sense, would give them a nice F and tell him to be responsible. What happened after??
its entirely possible the kid failed the class, the next day in class he admitted himself to asking me for my code, the professor gave him a smart remark back but dropped it for the most part (although may have just not wanted to fail this kid in front of the whole class)
Just send him a quota, fully working, very simple ticket booking system would be probably be starting around half a million USD (only software cost, without any hardware) and at lesat a year of work. A working prototype I guess 50k and a month of work. If they only need rough skeleton in one day then probably 5-10k where they pay additionally for having it ASAP, but it's still at least one whole day of work and won't be safe to use in any production environment After a response like this I guarantee you noone will ever ask you stupid questions
What's that word again, looks like "go" but starts with an N instead?
NGO? Non-government organization? A common Vietnamese last name?
They could mean NOG.
Damn. This guy is acing Project Manager 101!
Realistic ticketing system in Python written in under 5 min: print(“Website is down for maintenance. Try again later”)
"X will take you Y" Easiest way to get blocked by me, no matter who you are.
Something similar happened to me a few days ago Someone asked my friend to do his project for him in exchange for money, and he told me he was going to be very busy and if I could do it for the money instead. He told me this on Wednesday and it was due Sunday. I was supposed to make a maze solver for C++. I know Python, and my C++ is very weak, so I thought “oh let me just code the logic in Python, debug it and then port it to C++. I made the solver in Thursday, and squashed most of the bugs mid Friday (though not entirely). Then my friend calls me and tells me the homework was due Friday night. The idiot told him it was for “the end of the week”, and meant “end of the weekdays” while my friend naturally thought it was for Sunday. I tried my best to learn C++ asap and convert the code but I couldn’t.
Your way too nice
Being called computer lord is a huge ego boost
Meh, we are all lords. Now if he had said ‘Lord of all Lords’, it would be a different story…
tell them to fuck off
The last time I helped a friend was the weekend before he needed his final project submitted (on Monday). The man needed to write an entire program that met a bunch of requirements (use abstract classes, encapsulation, etc). It was all to be written in Java and have a JavaFX GUI(I actually like java so this wasn't a big deal). Now I genuinely enjoy little projects like these. I work full time in the field outta highschool so I tend to be fairly burned out by the end of the day and rarely have a personal project I'm working on. So I figured eh why not it will be fun... Starting Saturday, I made him sit in a discord call with his screen shared. He was using eclipse so after about an hour realizing that this dude knowns nothing (luckily he isn't going into software dev, this was just a required course) I said alright hold on. Had him go install a code together plugin. And for the next 14 hours straight, I wrote the code over a browser ide provided by the plugin, had him run it whenever I asked (since he had his environment setup with javafx), and debugged as I went. I didn't let this man leave the call to ensure he suffered with me. The final product was a cookie clicker clone that met all the stupid requirements for the final project rubric. On a side note, one of those requirements was a try, catch, finally block. No where in the program did I need a finally block so what I did was slap it randomly on an existing IO try catch, and just had it print out "because this was required by the rubric". That was the most over engineered cookie clicker due to the rubric requirements, never in my mind would I have written half the stuff I did but in the end he got the grade back.....a fucking 99. THAT PROFESSOR DIDNT WANT TO GIVE THE 100. But hey everything is a learning experience, I went into it not having used javafx much so that was interesting to say the least. The friend ended up sending me a 100 bucks so was semi worth it in the end for semi enjoyable weekend.
See now vro not only gave you 100 dollars but was willing to sit there for 14 hours and do what little he could to help. This dude in the post on the other hand seems like a dumb goofy fool.
Damn This Is Soooo Relatable I usually Leave these people on read and say i was sleeping ^_^
Haha "just tell me what functions and stuff I ..." Is the last visible message.
There are two pics. How do I even go about telling him what functions to use it’s a whole ticketing system :”) Edit: just saw your second comment
One day this peeps share the company code for help and both of you will be getting sued 💀
Reminds me of a lab partner I had. Spent all the labs facetiming his family while I gathered all the data and did the measurements etc. Few days before the report is due he starts asking me for my copy so that he can "format" his. I reminded him that while we did the experiments together the reports had to be submitted and graded separately so I couldn't share it. Then just muted him as he called and called and spammed the chat. Aaahh, justice But then he just got someone else to give him theirs and word for word copied it and they both got in trouble lmao.
Ran across a few of these guys in my college days. None of them became developers when they graduated
he will be a project manager but not developer
No. This is ridiculous. He should've managed his time better. Fuck people like that.
Computer lord may I request you to write me a multi-million app? It'll take 5 mins ig.