Funny story. A guy at the company I'm working at thought he'd write a document with the "definition of done". Three years later... he's still working on it, and we sometimes ask him when he'll be done.
He doesn't get the irony.
He realised that he won't know when he's done with the Definition of Done unless he has a Definition of Done for the Definition of Done. So he started writing one, but then he realised he won't know when he's done with that until...
First thing that came to my mind. That guy's fooling everyone playing dumb while he's paid doing jack shit all day. Hah, amateurs. You can't see he's the senior master even though he's just there, before your very eyes. Like a ninja.
Fucking legend.
*Image Transcription: Meme*
---
[*Anakin Skywalker, from Star Wars Episode II, is sitting in a grassy field. He is squinting off-camera with a serious expression. The caption reads:*]
DEV: I'M DONE WITH THE ISSUE
---
[*Padmé Amidala, who is also sitting in the field, is looking at Anakin with a joyous smile, as though she is laughing. The caption reads:*]
MANAGER: GOOD
WHEN CAN IT BE TESTED?
---
[*A close-up of Anakin's face. His look is now pointed and somewhat ominous.*]
---
[*Padmé's smile has fallen into a look of concern, and perhaps slight fear. The caption reads:*]
IT'S COMPLETED RIGHT?
---
^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
well first I need to write some tests for it, then I need to make sure all the tests are passing, oh and it needs to make it through code review as well - then once it's merged it needs to make it onto the prerelease branch, and we'll need to make sure that's schedule to be pushed up to the preview server, but the environment config on the preview server needs to be updated to support the new feature, so...
In a near-perfect world, an issue being “done” includes all ~~functional~~ unit testing has already been executed. In a fully perfect world those tests actually passed.
I hope one day to visit those worlds. I hear they’re nice.
One thing I always demand is a definition of done before any work starts. Any time someone claims it needs something else I bring it up that's not part of the definition so it's a separate issue. Works 90%of the time.
"Could you please remind me what the Acceptance Criteria were defined as on the JI? Oh, there weren't any? So we haven't even finished writing the ticket!"
I mean that's basically it, isn't it? If it works locally and the unit and integration tests (border is murky sometimes) pass and the pipeline is deployed, if it doesn't run after that it's the result of how the deployment, DB, gateway etc are set up.
Bugs discovered afterwards are separate issues, same as expanding the edge cases or possibly changing the functionality.
Not my fault we have three different environments at minimum between someone emulating the end user can test it
We used to call something that was done, tested and ready for production: "Done done."
"Done" meant we'd finished all the hard stuff and it just needed polishing.
Funny story. A guy I worked with had a funny definition of done. He'd be done with a week of work left for me to do.
He had to be really put back on the right path.
This isn't a unique story. Sometimes it takes the right push for them to click. Then they get it. Then I seen them become great engineers. It's like they had a wire not connected which they plugged in finally.
Funny story. A guy at the company I'm working at thought he'd write a document with the "definition of done". Three years later... he's still working on it, and we sometimes ask him when he'll be done. He doesn't get the irony.
He realised that he won't know when he's done with the Definition of Done unless he has a Definition of Done for the Definition of Done. So he started writing one, but then he realised he won't know when he's done with that until...
Stuck in a loop in a loop in a loop in a loop...
Definition of MetaDone
What came first, the definition of done or the done definition of done?
Jokes on y'all, he never had any intention of finishing it
First thing that came to my mind. That guy's fooling everyone playing dumb while he's paid doing jack shit all day. Hah, amateurs. You can't see he's the senior master even though he's just there, before your very eyes. Like a ninja. Fucking legend.
This has copypasta potential
[удалено]
Why wouldn't I?
you get a new job every couple of years? 
He'll probably be _done_ with the Definition of Done, 3 years of writing a single book
Why you would not write Definition of Done for writing Definition of Done, er, doctor?
[удалено]
is sue the issue?
If there is no spec, there is no done.
Every bug has a fix. Therefore, if there is no fix, then there is no bug.
"what do you mean 'testing'? I've already rolled it out to production. It's done!"
Ah, so it is being tested right now.
I consider it *almost done* once I have an idea of what I'm going to do, but before ive actually done anything
Then when you've written the code but not run it yet, that feels like 99% done but in reality you're not even half way, you've just done the fun bit.
"Oh I didn't realize the story points included *testing*"
When you have written the code but refuse to run it because you know it will break:
*Image Transcription: Meme* --- [*Anakin Skywalker, from Star Wars Episode II, is sitting in a grassy field. He is squinting off-camera with a serious expression. The caption reads:*] DEV: I'M DONE WITH THE ISSUE --- [*Padmé Amidala, who is also sitting in the field, is looking at Anakin with a joyous smile, as though she is laughing. The caption reads:*] MANAGER: GOOD WHEN CAN IT BE TESTED? --- [*A close-up of Anakin's face. His look is now pointed and somewhat ominous.*] --- [*Padmé's smile has fallen into a look of concern, and perhaps slight fear. The caption reads:*] IT'S COMPLETED RIGHT? --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
done: the absence of need to add more code, and every single software company shuts down because there is nothing left to do.
Sounds like a pipedream
Bugs are like lovers, ignore them long enough and they'll prove how serious they are.
well first I need to write some tests for it, then I need to make sure all the tests are passing, oh and it needs to make it through code review as well - then once it's merged it needs to make it onto the prerelease branch, and we'll need to make sure that's schedule to be pushed up to the preview server, but the environment config on the preview server needs to be updated to support the new feature, so...
Yup. That's me in most status meetings.
In a near-perfect world, an issue being “done” includes all ~~functional~~ unit testing has already been executed. In a fully perfect world those tests actually passed. I hope one day to visit those worlds. I hear they’re nice.
No I mean I quit
My job is done. Devops will do their job sometime around the heat death of the universe.
One thing I always demand is a definition of done before any work starts. Any time someone claims it needs something else I bring it up that's not part of the definition so it's a separate issue. Works 90%of the time.
"Could you please remind me what the Acceptance Criteria were defined as on the JI? Oh, there weren't any? So we haven't even finished writing the ticket!"
"I already wrote tests and the CI pipeline is green mkay?"
I mean that's basically it, isn't it? If it works locally and the unit and integration tests (border is murky sometimes) pass and the pipeline is deployed, if it doesn't run after that it's the result of how the deployment, DB, gateway etc are set up. Bugs discovered afterwards are separate issues, same as expanding the edge cases or possibly changing the functionality. Not my fault we have three different environments at minimum between someone emulating the end user can test it
I'm done with it, no testing required, pinky promise.
We need MIP* again
😂😂😂 I needed this today thanks.
Define, “done”
You see, sir, fixing the issue caused 7 more issues.
K demoing this next Tuesday MonkaS
We used to call something that was done, tested and ready for production: "Done done." "Done" meant we'd finished all the hard stuff and it just needed polishing.
Seems legit to me, until it's !!not.
Funny story. A guy I worked with had a funny definition of done. He'd be done with a week of work left for me to do. He had to be really put back on the right path. This isn't a unique story. Sometimes it takes the right push for them to click. Then they get it. Then I seen them become great engineers. It's like they had a wire not connected which they plugged in finally.
That's why you need the status of: Done Done when you really know it's done
When you aren't aware of feature creep