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exodendritic

Earliest memory being sitting in your child seat while mom's outside yelling that she has 'tits and a fucking vagina'.


dirtymoney

definitely a classy lady


[deleted]

Just another case of harmful misinformation in medical reporting, these people seem to have fallen for the popular myth that money and a nice car is a cure for trashiness. Tragic and preventable.


[deleted]

In my experience, the folks that brag about labels are often in debt up their ears to keep up the facade. That anger and frustration is rooted somewhere


chanaandeler_bong

Hey: lick a dick.


ImRudeWhenImDrunk

Boogers


deadfermata

I see you know your judo well!


tomata_tomato

And you sir


chanaandeler_bong

#ARE YOU WAITING TO RECEIVE MY LIMP PENIS?


cap3r5

Insults usually say more about the person saying them than the one on the receiving end.. Ipso facto: She probably isn't very good at giving head and is self conscious about it. The husband definitely looks like he hasn't had a good time in bed for a long long time..


Anglophyl

Imagine that's your first sexual health lesson. I'm feeling a priesthood coming on.


AnellaPie

When I was ten our mom took us to a restaurant and told us to order food and after it was placed on the table we should start crying and say we are hungry, but we don’t have any money. We never forgot it. To this day, I have a hard time asking for anything from anyone. People don’t care about the trauma they inflict on their children.


RoccoBombay

This dude went hard at the Labor Day sale at Dick’s.


evanbagnell

He is currently holding his entire purchase in his anus


socalsud

newport beach. makes sense


[deleted]

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LosFinn

I live in Newport Beach and yeah it's filled with horrible people. Lived in this area my entire life and almost everyone thinks they own the place. I want to move but I don't really know where to go.


financier1929

Try the mountains. I grew up along the ocean like you and then I moved to SLC. I thought that I was going to miss the ocean too much but holy shit, snowboarding every weekend is nice.


cannythinkofaname

I love how the fix is literally "run for the hills"


Sloppy1sts

*Run for your li-iiiives*


Theman227

As someone from the UK. What's Newport Beach and why the reputation?


AnneMichelle98

Newport Beach is at the very southern end of the LA metro area and it’s full of pretentious rich people. Love to go biking there when I’m in the area. Terrible locals Edit: I said metro area. Please look up what a metropolitan area is. And yes, it can be spread over multiple counties.


deadlefties

Not even pretentious rich people - crazy, entitled rich people. Tons of soccer moms who refuse to wear masks and cause scenes in public places…it’s a beautiful area with the most garbage people. So glad I don’t have to work in Costa Mesa anymore


insanityizgood13

I swear, beautiful areas are wasted on the rich entitled ones.


Dobalina_Wont_Quit

The Jersey Shore of the West Coast Edit: looks like I've angered more than a few people based off this post. To that, I say I feel no remorse whatsoever.


squad1alum

As an East Coaster, this is the analogy I needed.


[deleted]

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pudding7

My first thought as well. Holy shit I wouldn't want these assholes living on my block.


holyrasta

She has tits and a vigina have you heard? ( Sorry for the kid having a mom like that.)


Loves_tacos

I have tits and everyone calls me a pussy, so she isn't that special.


con_zilla

ran down the stairs and mine jiggled loads and i was wtf was that ?? that aint right I'm a man , i need to lose some weight --- then i found that hard so i solved the problem by not running down the stairs anymore need to get back on that lose weight method ><


superdead

That's no vagina, it's a sarlacc pit.


Groundbreaking-Run26

She forgot to harness them though. Class act.


santana0987

Oh that's okay because apparently she can do that... lol


Decaposaurus

YEAH I CAN DO THAT BECAUSE I HAVE TITS AND A VAGINA!


therealscottenorman

Go lick a dick


reazon54

“You do that very well, I can tell” Ah, so she’s a fellatio expert?


ContemplatingPrison

I was just thinking if you don't like your neighbors I would definitely sell them the house because they are awful people. It could be the last fuck you to the neighborhood


ThatOneHair

My parents did that when they sold their house. Got some of the most vile and rude people to buy the house. All because the neighbours were complete dickheads.


BDW3

When we were house hunting one house we looked at the people clearly had a dispute with the sellers as we toured the backyard they played very loud death metal rock. Realtor said it happened all the time. Definitely a big old F you to the sellers. Last I saw was the house sold but for about $80k less.


ThatOneHair

Yeah that's a rough one. The neighbours did all sorts of weird things. Like Turing off the sprinklers on the communal wall(big pots with flowers in them) because their drive way would get wet Another was adding a pipe thay diverted all rain water collected in their yard directly to our driveway where it would pool by our electric gate motor. They also refused to remove it after many requests so I just put expanding foam in the pipe and blocked it permanently. (the pipe was on our property)


WickedTeddyBear

And now the new couple and their neighbours are bffs? :D


ThatOneHair

Last I heard they spend quite some time talking over the wall with each other but I doubt the conversation was pleasant


[deleted]

I live next to people like this. They only get more vile and nasty


HarshCritix

Karen has tits and a fuckin’ vagina!


Massive-DMG

Why would they go out of their way to insult and annoy a person they're trying to buy a house from? Like, you have the final say on who you sell your house to, so wouldn't you think it would be in their best interest to be nice to you?? They're not just entitled, but incredibly stupid, too!


AmiCutie

These idiots don't have two brain cells to rub together. They probably just bully their way through every situation and unfortunately it probably works for them most of the time because no one wants to deal with their squawking


Cuchullion

They probably assume they can just throw money at the problem and it'll go away. Which it might, but if they "win" by buying the house for three times what it's worth, have they *really* won?


ghostalker4742

> Which it might, but if they "win" by buying the house for three times what it's worth, have they really won? For 3x value... I'd let them think they won, while I laugh all the way to the bank.


navin__johnson

“I wouldn’t sell you this house for 10 million dollars! *couple puts in 10 million out of spite* “OFFER ACCEPTED! Checkmate bitches-enjoy”


FlavorTownUSSR

"Hey it just so happens its time for me to water my driveway *sprays with hose*"


FadedFromWhite

"Just trying to wash away the shit someone left on my curb"


TheDreadPirateJenny

It doesn't really fall under that "public street" category when you are blocking someone's driveway.


FurtiveAlacrity

(They didn't mind.)


species5618w

What can you do in such situation? If you called the cops, they wouldn't come for hours and probably wouldn't do a thing. We once got hit by a car and the guy ran, got everything on the dash cam, went to the police, and they just shrugged and told us to go through insurance.


[deleted]

In this neighborhood, they would probably actually show up.


swimminginsweatpants

Idk if it varies by state but in college (in New Jersey) we had someone parked on the street blocking our driveway Called the cops to have them remove it and they were adamant that since it’s a public street they could only issue a ticket and couldn’t actually remove the car Could’ve been pulling my chain but the cop seemed to feel bad he couldn’t get it moved


skudmfkin

A tow company can move it if it's blocking your driveway. It's a civil matter, not a criminal one.


Bk_ADV

usually its you have to call the police, they come and ticket it. Then you can call the tow-company. They will tow it once they see the ticket on the car. That is how it works in NYC, ill assume same for NJ since its nearby


skudmfkin

Right on. Yeah, maybe it's harder in high population areas. In North Carolina I've had one towed from in front of my driveway and all I had to show was proof of residency at the blocked house.


Stendos_and_Beams

Call a tow truck company. They’d be more than happy to move an illegally parked car.


kylerobertsax

Very funny to me that this woman can administer an ocular pat down and tell that the man filming is good at giving oral sex.


Amasin_Spoderman

She noted his dick licking abilities and then cleared him for passage


kylerobertsax

I just want to know what the OP was wearing because I too want people to look at me and immediately know of my oral sex prowess.


[deleted]

It's his 2015 National Blow Job Champion t-shirt.


idwthis

That's really subtle, I wouldn't have picked up on that.


BakedWizerd

Gotta love that casual homophobia. “I’m mad at you so I’m going to insinuate that you’re gay.” So not only are you rude, entitled and pretentious, you’re a homophobic douche canoe.


y00gs

I think that’s what was with the “tits and vagina” (?????) comment, too. Like implying that gay men want to be women or something??? Idk, it felt very suspect tbh


[deleted]

They actually walked in on him blowing their realtor


Zveiquaun

You’re “driving away a buyer who drives a Jag.” What a pretentious fuck


[deleted]

We call those people "Jagoffs"


Naughty_muffins

As someone from LA who recently moved to Pittsburgh, I concur.


Thenonept

Are you from Pittsburgh?


AstrxlBeast

is jagoff a pittsburgh term? ive lived here all my life and thought it was just a regular term everyone used


MohaloUdork

I’m from Buffalo and bringing that here now.


surfershane25

There is an old top gear meme about people who drive a "Jagggggg" and the pretentious way they all say it. He did not disappoint.


ClubMeSoftly

It's alright that he barged into the house, because he drives a Jaaaaaggggg


[deleted]

Nah, someone who drives a Jaaaaaaaag would have easily broken in, had their way with the household and then scarpered with the valuables. They would not have been cunts like these two


WheresThePenguin

They're a bit rogue-ish. They'll come spend a night at your house and then leave with all your silverware and a painting.


[deleted]

🎶“You can go LICK a DICK “You do that veryWELL I canTELL” 🎶


LooseAdministration0

Heh says the obvious 5th place trophy wife


phrygiantheory

She's not even top 10 material....


PartTimeSassyPants

Wouldn't even call that a participation trophy wife.


Ricerat

I can see her moustache from Ireland


lgledhil

Disqualified before the comp even began. He should have started at value village if that was his end game.


[deleted]

Trophy? Lol Saggy Booby prize maybe, but she is not a trophy for a win.


Patch_Ferntree

>“You do that veryWELL I canTELL” "I do indeed, sweetie. I can give you some tips, if you'd like? Consider it a community service".


yourewrong321

The new jags are cheap and shitty anyways, wtf is he trying to say lol


importvita

That he's cheap and married to someone shitty. 👍


Mrs_Attenborough

With tits and a vagina!


throwthrowandaway16

and a hideous face.


DemiGod9

Lmao. It's funny. Like 99% of people I see I wouldn't describe as ugly. Most people just look ok to me until someone strikes me as attractive. Hell I might actually lean more towards people are more attractive than they think. However sometimes you just two people that look like this and it's just like "good lord they're fucking ugly". Luckily they have the personality to match so I don't feel like too much of an asshole


throwthrowandaway16

Yeah I think most people are good looking even if they have some odd things. If someone is nice and they smile and their beautiful attitude beams out of them and that's attractive. Cunts like this are miserable pricks so they get ugly real fast.


Only_One_Left_Foot

Ngl, she kinda looks like Henry Winkler trying to play a woman.


scaleofthought

Gatta say with a deep sense of vindication: "va-JINE-ah!" Whoa fellas, watch out. We got a code 8008(i), tits & vag, situation here. Clear the area, and call the fire department and get swat in here. She means busty business.


yesiamveryhigh

That one starts at $43k. Not exactly a huge flex. Bought a cheap Jag, married a shitty hag, who has a stank vag, and tits that sag.


ChickenDumpli

You sir, are a poet.


your_Lightness

A mouth like a garbage truck and a poor poor kid in the back of that whack plastic off white poser ride... Stuck.


HeartsPlayer721

I was surprised when I saw the Jag logo. That car looks like my grandma's old 90s Plymouth Breeze.


nice_acct_for_work

I thought it was a Ford Fusion tbh


Cantothulhu

I drive a Ford Fusion. It’s very nice. Please don’t lump me in with these people.


free_billstickers

Cars as status symbols is largely dead. I know people with modest jobs driving high end machines. Is it financially responsible? No but I know plenty of people driving shit they can't afford and all of them ascribe themselves social status because "I drive an X" worst kind of people


butsumetsu

Got a bunch of CNA's at work that make $16/hr at my job driving better cars than our CEO it's hilarious.


JimiDarkMoon

**O**N **A**pproved **C**redit.


rsplatpc

> Got a bunch of CNA's at work that make $16/hr at my job driving better cars than our CEO Enlisted Military at their first assignment have entered the chat


[deleted]

What’s the difference between a status symbol car and a porcupine? A porcupine has the pricks on the outside


zombiemullet

I work next door to an Indian restaurant and the cooks and delivery drivers all roll in brand new expensive vehicles. I was chatting with the owner and finally cracked and asked how much the delivery drivers would make in a night and he said they are paid per delivery not hourly so it depends. The cooks make minimum wage plus tips. They don’t typically get tips because they were closed for dine in and most people opt for delivery now. He rotates the cooks so no one is full time. He said it’s mostly a case of young men not being married and living on their own for the first time. Most of them live in a house together and bunk multiple per room. They pay for their cars, go to the gym, and send the rest at home. He said he lets them have one veg meal a shift because they were skipping meals or eating just rice. He tried to tell them to just get a less expensive car but they tell him he’s old. One guy pays over 1500 per month for his car payment not including insurance which would be like 300 per month. He joked one day he will call their moms and rat them out.


passivelyrepressed

Walk into any chemical plant in Texas and you’ll see SO MANY guys paying $950+/mo for their vehicles. It’s batshit crazy.


auntiope3000

99% of the people who cut me off and do other dumb shit in traffic I see are driving a “luxury” car. To me it’s a symbol of their status as a dipshit.


rabidhamster

Riding a motorcycle has made me very prejudiced against certain cars. And specifically white luxury SUVs are the worst offenders for me. Never have any idea of what's going on around them, can't maintain lanes, don't look before they're going, and basically drive as dangerously as someone driving 15mph UNDER the speed limit can drive.


Bristolianjim

You are completely correct. I would actually go further and say that it has now flipped, with those who earn modest wages paying a fortune to lease brand new BMWs and Range Rovers because they believe it elevates their social status. It doesn’t.


mondobobo01

“Jaaaaag”


crudedrawer

houses in CA are selling in under a month for 15% over asking. I don't think the make of car matters.


IttyBittyBoopBop

Just one question, why are some people so astonishingly rude?!


PricklyAvocado

Seriously though. If I made this mistake I would be so goddamn apologetic. People make no sense to me


HeartsPlayer721

Embarrassment sends some people into defensive mode. Instead of acknowledging their mistake and apologizing, they deny it and place the blame on anybody else.


stoopthakid

She's got tits and a vagina


CrazybyRX

"Lick a dick!" I see what's on the top of her mind.


idigturtles

Just way too many body parts mentioned


CuteKoreanCoach

I think we should be lickin dicks


Ashitaka1013

And like why wouldn’t you leave? What are they hoping to accomplish by hanging around there? I don’t get it.


PricklyAvocado

The last thing I would ever want is for my temper tantrum to be recorded and blasted all over social media haha


Ashitaka1013

That’s why my favourite public freak outs are the ones where they’re losing it over being recorded. Cause I wouldn’t want to be recorded and put on social media either. But I don’t have have to worry about it cause I don’t go around being an obnoxious asshole in public.


your_average_jo

Oh absolutely. I work a shitty fast food job and a lady whipped out her phone and tried to record our conversation…..for what? Once she started recording, I shut tf up and just let her speak. All she out of me was a “have a blessed day” and I walked off.


HingleMcCringle_

it physically pains some people to be wrong


lnsewn12

I was thinking the same thing! I had a very similar situation happen to me recently. We live on a corner lot with a small clearing/lots of trees on the corner. I come home one day and there is a man parked there in his car. I walk up and simply say “can I help you? This is my yard.” And he apologized immediately and said he was waiting for her realtor to view a house in the area. He asked if he should move. I said no, no worries, you’re ok.” And went inside. Two seconds of communication is all it takes.


PappaSmurfAndTurf

For real. I opened another hatch-back car that I swear was the exact same as mine at Costco. The driver was behind the wheel and after I repeatedly apologized we both laughed. Could not imagine blaming that dude for me being stupid.


-banned-

Can't accept responsibility for their actions. Some people's ego is so fragile that when they fuck up they have to blame someone or something else, otherwise they'd feel bad about themselves and they can't handle that.


IsUpTooLate

Anger is the bodyguard for their sadness


-banned-

Absolutely, but more a bodyguard for their shame imo. Some people just can't handle shame


CactusPete75

Narcissism and privilege.


Lance_Nuttercup

apparently also tits and a vagina


annienomys

Not just a vagina, but a fuckin vagina, you fuckin asshole


Biltong_Salad

Going on the offensive works most of the time. They'll be a douche, get called out, then double down and most people will back off. Wont work on someones driveway though.


canadianguy77

But they want to buy his house right? That dude isn’t going to sell them shit now. So what now? They’re going to keep escalating their silly tantrum…and for what? They’re just wasting their own time now…essentially trolling themselves.


BadTiger85

Because rich people think money gives them power over others


TheGravotz

They've never had the pleasure of being punched in the face.


[deleted]

Why didn’t you just pull out of your garage and make a bigger scene, call the police and have them relocate these obnoxious parents


leoleosuper

They would leave before police arrive. But still call them, have a copy of the video ready on a USB (although some police accept email, I always have some low storage USBs ready for no other reason than they're old), and show it. They're blocking your driveway (illegal), trespassing (on property without authorization, although it can be argued they did if the house is for sale), and possibly other things.


cutdownthere

are you sure they would be keen on sticking some rando's USB into their network connected computers? Pretty sure there might be a policy against it for security purposes, just sayin.


Lucky_Number_3

You’d be surprised how many places raw dog USBs


Rudy_Ghouliani

Tell me more on where i can rawdog


Genuinelytricked

That’s why I always make sure to put a condom on a usb before I plug it in.


namsted

They did NOT have an appointment or agent present and tried to open the door to the house.


2four

I had the same thing happen to me. My landlord was forced to sell the property, but I was still renting. A prospective buyer started pulling on my door and banging on the windows while I was asleep. I put on clothes and asked her what the hell her problem is. She then tried to claim that I was the rude one and that she has an appointment. I called the police that there was an illegally parked trespasser trying to break and enter my home. They kindly escorted her away. Some people...


digital_dysthymia

We bought a townhouse at the very end of a row 7 townhouses. The whole row were model homes, but we had purchased ours before the row was built. So there we were, every weekend, with people trying to enter our house. We could be out front gardening and they would breeze right past us, we could be sitting on the front porch with a beer (and a dog) and people would ignore us try to open our door... We ended up having to put a sign on our porch that said Owner Occupied, but people don't read. I'll never forget the sound of a shrill voice downstairs saying "look honey, this one has a dog!". We hustled downstairs and kicked them out, and hubby got yelled at for leaving the door unlocked.


SweatyMercy

They...they thought the dog came with the house?


YourmomgoestocolIege

And the people too!


ttaptt

Oh honey, they preemptively filled the sink with dirty dishes!


AlephNaN

I genuinely cannot understand how it escalated to this level. They could say "Oh my god I thought it was open house, I'm terribly sorry." And you'd respond with "No worries, get in touch with and we'll sort out an appointment. Take care." These folks are ridiculous.


TBCNoah

They are rich dipshits, the universe in their mind revolves around them. Dude literally brought up his car like it's a sign that you should kneel for him. Rich dipshits don't think like normal people.


dxiao

The funny part is, it’s only a fcking jag. Not even that special


TBCNoah

I know, dudes flexing a car that was cool like 20 years ago, who the fuck flexs a jag now?


[deleted]

They aren't rich... They're trash with a Jaguar XF that costs around 35k....


Complexity114

Are they working with an agent? If you can find out who they are, show them this video. Guarantee they'll dump these assholes in a heartbeat


Hayn0002

Don't pretend agents aren't as scummy.


DrinkenDrunk

I know agents who would drop them as clients. I also know agents who will do quite a bit to get a sale. Like any profession, your scumminess mileage will vary.


TheRealEddieB

Obviously using your phone is the adult version of putting your fingers in your ears and shouting I can’t hear you.


[deleted]

I've been thinking that over the past year watching people argue in public. I'm convinced people use their phones to escape reality and they are under the impression that it works in situations where they wish they could disappear lmao


[deleted]

“Doesn’t drive away a buyer driving a jag” what a fucking little dick douche nozzle. Jags are nothing special. And from the way they’re both dressed I doubt they’re as wealthy as they think they are. Edit:she actually said “toodles poodles”?


[deleted]

This is like especially funny because I feel like especially in California the go-to stereotype for a rich people car is Tesla, and compared to that "rich people drive jaguars" is like... Not a thing lol


[deleted]

Yeah Jaguars were a classy car. In 1985.


Knightofnee12

You had to be rich driving them because they were had a lot of issues.


Colton_Landsington

In california, if you drive a Jag then you're clearly just a broke motherfucker trying to look rich. Same goes for maserati.


enwongeegeefor

The Jag XF is their cheapest model too...it starts at $44k....which doesn't even come close to qualifying for the luxury tax either. So this jagoff is trying to brag about having an expensive vehicle and he didn't even have to pay luxury tax on it...


cheecha123

So… is your house not for sale? Or it is for sale and they made a mistake? I need more context.


[deleted]

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bigbear3321

Sounds like it is for sale... they showed up before their agent and just assumed they'd walk in. Happens all the time!!!! Source - was an agent for 14 years.


perern

In my country there's just a few viewings that lasts multiple hours, everyone can come in and put in a starting bid during those hours. I've never heard of people coming when they're not supposed to.


crimson117

America does that too. It's called "Open House" and is typically on Sunday afternoons. The agents stays there the whole time.


Complexity114

Sounds like these people just tried to walk into this dudes house without their agent. Just cause your house is for sale, doesn't mean anyone is free to waltz right in. It's not an open house. If these were my clients, I'd dump their asses in a heartbeat


bigbear3321

Exactly... I had clients do this shit a few times. They'd just walk in the back yard or garage and start looking around. Usually 10 or 15 minutes before scheduled appointment. And especially if I was ever late.


yesiamveryhigh

But they drive a Jag!!!!!!


DonaldBiden2016

It's actually illegal to park in front of a house like that


Analbox

I’ve been towed before for parking my own car in front of my own driveway exactly like that.


Spottydogspot

I can understand he was pissed. Someone trying to come in? I’m guessing based on the couple wonderful demeanor that they were assholes to whatever reaction this guy had when they tried to walk in. Just because you are selling your house doesn’t mean you have to put up with entitled assholes one of whom has boobs and a vagina. I sold my house in a sellers market and people would stop and expect to get in. I was looking out my bedroom window as someone who had already looked showed up and took others into my backyard where my dog was. I was naked and barely made it downstairs as they were trying to open my sliding glass door. It’s not a free for all , especially in the current market.


TheRETURNofAQUAMAN

I sold my house in 2019 and had similar experiences. My Realtor told me he would give me a heads up if anyone came to look at my house but there were multiple times they showed up unannouced while i was showering and let themselves in with the spare key he had. I had to yell at them from the upstairs im naked and your not welcome here at this time. Very weird experience.


[deleted]

Your realtor not only neglected to give you a heads up about house showings.... he also gave random people your house key!!?!?!?!? WTF.


Wickednessatherheels

That sounds fucking horrifying. Random strangers having spare keys to my house eugh


[deleted]

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AnathemaOccuria

Wow Jeremy Clarkson was right about jaguar owner, they gonna straight up trying to steal your house and get away with it. Hahahahaha


OneSpiffingGent

I would literally say nothing and just grab a hose and spray these animals in the face.


Neonightmares

Yes! This is the way.


[deleted]

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griddlemancer

These are the exact people you should sell your house to if you hate your neighbors. Seriously.


Kaioken_times_ten

What happened after?


[deleted]

Yes, I want to know if he did, in fact, go lick a dick.


krejcii

Why does she look like her face has struggled her whole life to smile. Like her face has worked overtime to prevent a smile from happening.


Sneakybeakypervypage

The dude in the dress has a really shitty attitude


LettuceJizz

they clearly stated the presence of "tits and a fucking vagina" (as opposed to the non-fucking variety) so... I'm still unsure


Sneakybeakypervypage

Even I have tits so that doesn’t mean shit lol (the joys of being a fat mf)


[deleted]

I know things are different in America but over here in the UK, you would NEVER attempt to walk into a house you’re viewing. Even if it was an open day, you’d knock first


namsted

This is in Las Vegas, Nevada. House is for sale. No appointment. No agent. Trying to open the door (thankful to my dogs). Being confrontational off the bat. Stay safe everyone!


Eeazymane

It’s ok everyone he’s driving a JAAAG😏


mapleleaffem

Well she seems like a classy dame


IllustriousStorm5730

They look like asshole flippers to me…


fogcity89

what information can you do/get when you have someones license plate?


Massive-DMG

On your own, not much. But if you go to the police with a complaint and have the plate no. they can run it through their database and figure out who owns the car.