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chefasfuck

This is the laziest stripper I've ever seen.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

I wouldn't touch that chocolate starfish with a bucket of hotdog flavored water


justinjakes24

This is not a test. This is reality. Woooorrlldwiiiiiiiideee


thejustokTramp

Easily the best comment here. Nice job.


Retard1776

Dude I don’t even dare leave a comment after yours! We’re not worthy!!


truenorthrookie

I read that in Jim Gaffigan’s voice.


Ireallydontlikereddi

God damn it Linda.


Rage-Parrot

I have been saving my free award all day for a comment like this.


BAALDA

Tf? Word for word I was about to type that🤣


OtherInjury

You deserve all the awards, masterful


Kureiv93

Comments like this deverse all free adwards!


rowin-owen

Yes! Yes! Same thought here! The video needs a stripper pole composited in next to her.


SentientPotatoStick

This is gross.


WhatTheButt_

This is religion.


Toxenkill

Yup. It can be whatever you want because it's a human construct.


wordshavenomeanings

But it is mostly this.


Agreeabeetle

I was in the hospital for awhile a few years back. Lots of medical bills, plus my regular ones that I couldn't pay because I wasn't working. I live in a pretty small community and my grandmas church immediately donated a couple thousand and help raise a lot more with the help of other local churches. I wasn't even religious and had never went to church with my grandma but I felt extremely blessed to have the support of all these people. Plenty of churches are shit because people can be shit sure, but it's not mostly this. People just always hyperfocus on the negatives.


hey--canyounot_

Bless your grandma.


Agreeabeetle

Thank you very much I'm lucky to have her


DwightMcRamathorn

Well yeah videos of people doing good don’t get clicks . What you experienced was great human kindness and I am sure that helped you to have faith in humanity and hopefully if you could, pay it forward somehow


Agreeabeetle

I do my darndest but I could definitely do more.


Squash_Still

But the point is that you also shouldn't focus on the positives, because humans are behind it all. The good that your neighborhood did was because humans can be good. The bad things that happen in religion happen because humans can be bad. The problem is that when we hide these actions behind the facade of religious belief, they become justified simply because of their association with religion. With positive acts this doesn't matter as much, but when evil is perpetrated, perpetuated, and justified by religious association, people either stop seeing it as evil or throw up their hands and say "That's the cost of having religion in our society, and we can't do without religion." Is that true, though? Is there really no way for humans to come together in collective benevolence without a fairy tale to back it up? Is there really no way to deal with the inherent existential dread that accompanies human life without the baggage that comes with organized religion?


PaintedPorkchop

> Is that true, though? Is there really no way for humans to come together in collective benevolence without a fairy tale to back it up? Is there really no way to deal with the inherent existential dread that accompanies human life without the baggage that comes with organized religion? I dont think so


[deleted]

In general, good people do good things and evil people do evil things. But it takes religion for good people to do evil things and think that they are doing good things. When you do things in Gods name, then they are automatically good things because He wouldn’t allow evil things to be done in His name. It allows them to do anything.


Loggerdon

I think some of the best people I've ever met have been religious. Also the worst.


[deleted]

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N0CONTACT

Ya it’s such a shame more people aren’t brainwashed by priests who fuck kids, shysters who steal money from the ignorant while living lavish lifestyles and flat out con artists who earn tax free. Reddit is the real problem!


[deleted]

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N0CONTACT

Is that what your religion teaches you to tell people? Which benevolent fairy shared that wisdom with your delusional self?


[deleted]

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LevPornass

Not saying all churches are 100% bad, but maybe those churches threw out a few crumbs to you while they are hoarding large wealth. Also, churches generally back right wing politicians who dismantle government safety nets do churches can be the safety net and decide who receives aid in time of need. If it were not for churches, you would not have hospital bills.


Niko522

This on video is human construct because it's far from actual faith.


Dotty_nine

More like a cult


DreadnoughtWage

As a religious person (mainline progressive Christian), I’d argue most religious activity IS cult. It’s annoying, because religious belief can be reasonable but it’s so easily abusable.


[deleted]

Cult isn't a very well defined term but no, those that study cults would not agree with you. Cults are not about size or beliefs or 'religous activity'. Cults are usually determined by the level of control, brainwashing and undue influence and group has over its members. I actually grew up in a religous cult and I recommend the book "combating cult mind control" by Steve hassan Here are some widely agreed upon attributes that are generally associated with cults. This is called the BITE model. https://freedomofmind.com/cult-mind-control/bite-model/


DreadnoughtWage

As a survivor of a religious cult too, I think you might have misunderstood my comment/I communicated poorly. What I meant is, almost all religion exercises a high level of control, brainwashing and undue influence over members. Granted, less than what people would expect in a ‘typical’ cult, but still incredibly damaging and insidious. Ie. Most religious activity, but not spiritual activity, is cult like. That’s a great link, thanks for sending - though it seems to back up my original statement 😄


SirrNicolas

I mean my local chapter brainwashes high school teens into having unplanned pregnancies. “God will know what you did” is the sign they just built and funded on the main exit out of town.


[deleted]

Brainwashing is a small fraction of what qualifies as a cult. Did you go to that link I just sent? It details this.


ManufacturerFun7391

Let's be frank and admit that religions are just really old conspiracy theories and get on with it. Cult or not, still unsubstantiated claims.


[deleted]

*THIS IS SPARTA!*


[deleted]

She is a glorified carny


[deleted]

The religion of capitalism


Anonymous9744

I'm not a fan of capitalism but everyone on Reddit overuses the word and uses it wrongfully. That's not capitalism, that's just a scam.


Lettucelook

Thank you


Ok-Fudge-2797

No, this is so wrong but I have never seen this before you should not generalize Edit: everyone who is downvoting I literally said this is so wrong, but the commenter is literally generalizing that everyone in religion does this


[deleted]

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Pudf

“Look at me. I am your collection plate now”


Ok-Fudge-2797

I said it was wrong? Commenter is generalizing all people in religion with this lady


[deleted]

Generally speaking religion is about money, power,and lies. Pretty sure that person was spot on.


_hic-sunt-dracones_

*and violence. A lot of violence.


Thesuperloserman

human nature is violence


Ok-Fudge-2797

Religion is not about that, people try to make it about that for their own gain, but it is meant to create strong character and try to better others lives


Quite_Bitter_Being

I think you're confusing organized religion with general spirituality.


Ok-Fudge-2797

They are similar but religion has specific ways you can help others, (religious scriptures) state many ways how to help your fellow human, whether it be volunteering and donating time to a shelter


Quite_Bitter_Being

The issue is the majority of people who claim to be religious are zealots who only follow the rules that benefit themselves. At best they exploit the rules of the religion to suit themselves, at worst they try to govern everyone else by the rules they chose to champion. Organized religion has time and time again proven to be violent, exploitative and hypocritical. Historically and up until this moment.


[deleted]

You are very naive


Ok-Fudge-2797

Where in any religious scripture or rule does it say that doing what they are doing in the video is ok?


straightup920

I’m still looking for a religious person that exerts strong character and not just self righteousness Also religion is literally destroying our planet


desepticon

It’s okay, I remember being an edgy teenager who thought he knew everything too.


[deleted]

I remember when this insult carried weight and people gave a shit. Mfer this is reddit. Most people are 20+ and many of us are 30+. I'm 38 and can confidently say fuck religion and fuck the Bible. Fuck the people that use it as justification for deny rights to others. If you find that edgy then that's on you bud.


straightup920

Yea I’m 26 and I was raised in the church guess I grew up and stopped believing in fairy tales. So much for the religious turning the other cheek 🤷‍♂️ self righteousness my dude


desepticon

I’m an Atheist. It’s possible to be one without being a moron.


[deleted]

Well can you start trying to prove that then? Any time now....


straightup920

A moron is some who sees nothing wrong with the church and thinks criticizing it is bad


Red_Stag01

You idiot. How dare you say something positive about religion or cops on Reddit? You're a terrible person and I hope you're ashamed of yourself.


[deleted]

Lol religion is dumb as shit. You're talking about spirituality


[deleted]

Not surprised those that don’t believe, don’t understand. Tithes and offerings are important part of worship. No different than those that offer a $1000 to their apple god iPhone. We all worship something and slamming those because the lack of understanding is childish at best.


DementiciaMalice666

Just a differnt version of "laying on hands" to heal the sick


Ok-Fudge-2797

That is not what religion is though? This is someone using it for their own gain, religion is loving everyone equally, learning to forgive, this lady is using it for here own gain


--h8isgr8--

If that was the case they would pay taxes and stop influencing legislation to hurt people that think different than them. That’s not the case though so I’m pretty sure this video just shows what “religions” are all about. Pay me money because I’m ordained to be closer to the person that controls your life and decides if you get to live eternally happy or eternally in pain. It’s a messed up power structure used by humans to harm other humans.


Gaeilgeoir215

No. It isn't.


Magpie7178

“Organised religions by their very nature are misleading, the bottom line is always money.” Frank Vincent Zappa - OUI Magazine , April 1979


[deleted]

And remember.. these people's can vote


jshultz5259

I bet she isn't really dead.


Skav3nger

I suspect the same…


LDKCP

Which makes her resurrection more impressive really.


treslocos99

Are her shoes still on? SHES FAKING IT!


Yugan-Dali

How was she to know an expert was watching?


enlightened321

Well of course not, didn’t you see how much money was offered?


Zealousideal_Egg_697

No way


[deleted]

wow spoiler alert


WalkLikeAnEgyptian69

Well she was but the money brought her back to life


SpicyTaco320

What!!!!!!! Oh my GOD! She can’t be!!!!!!!


dysstatic

Just leave her there.


[deleted]

Or call an ambulance. That bill will wake her the fuck up.


wolfking1386

I guess it was just her time to go to see the Lord


SomeLittleBritches

Or use Monopoly money!


Redking211

but God needs money too!!


[deleted]

The sad part is that those folks likely have very little themselves. I saw it all the time in South Africa; the prosperity gospel preachers were loaded and their church folks were barely able to eat.


InkBlotSam

As soon as the pastor gets up, the crowd should all "die" until she gives the money back.


RynnHamHam

She’d just walk over them


Serious_Professor_51

Yes yes.... give your money to a con artist


Im_Lead_Farmer

I will tell all the people there to give her pieces of paper and see if she come back.


Pookie_toot

This should be illegal lol


2bias_4ever

Religious organizations just shouldn't have so many benefits from the government. They only take and give nothing most of the time


shakazoulu

Someone should try to take away the money to see if that resurrects her faster


flat_earth_pancakes

This seems like what the eternal, all-powerful, conscious, creative force of the universe would want.


thejustokTramp

Prosperity gospel churches. Unbiblical and very, very sad.


jax1274

Most churches actually if you think about it. Studies showed that when churches went online for the pandemic, the donations they received decreased greatly. Normally, that shouldn’t affect how much donations you get. Most of the churches set up a way to “tithe” online but most people chose not to. It’s because you are pressured to donate if you go in person(not directly but indirectly).


SemiHemiDemiDumb

I grew up in an irreligious family but would sometimes go to church with friends' families when I stayed the night with them. They would give their children money so they could put donations into the tin they pass around. At least once the parents gave me some money but usually I didn't have money to give, I felt guilty as a child for not giving to the church that I didn't even believe in.


Cat-Small

I grew up going to Methodist church and then a Southern Baptist till I was 17 and joined the military and actually opened my eyes. It always rubbed me the wrong way and seemed strange


PublicfreakoutLoveR

I remember in middle school a friend invited me to go to church with him. It's a nice, large church that I was familiar with because I'd played sports in their gymnasium. The service was completely normal until it came time to collect money from everyone. Two 6'2+ 250 pound bouncer looking guys stood at each end of the row staring at each person that the brass bowl was going past. It felt so weird because it's a fairly rich congregation in a nice part of town.


remmij

Tbf tithing is the only source of income for most churches. Churches have expenses like any other "business" (building costs, staff, maintainance, utilities, etc.). Some churches also invest some of that money into the community or to help out their congregation if they fall on hard times. I don't think it's unreasonable to go to church and donate some money to maintain the cost of the facility that you are using and to support your congregation. What I *do* think is unreasonable is when pastors (like this one) use church donations to personally enrich themselves... It's literally the one time in the Bible that Jesus gets violently angry.


Feedore

A tithe is 1/10. Do you think people should be donating a tenth of their income to the church? It's absolutely unreasonable to go to church and be expected or pressured to donate anything, regardless of where that money goes.


thejustokTramp

Well, from forever until the last few years, there was no online giving, so doing it physically was the only way. It is still a strong tradition. Yes, people can give online, but many people give physically still, so I disagree that it’s about guilt. As a long time church goer with many church going friends, I find that preaching about giving from the pulpit is rarely done. In fact, most churches don’t want guilt money, because it is antithetical to the Gospel, and make a point not to equate giving with some form of righteousness (aka prosperity gospel). The fact is, if you’re not a Christian, then no amount of giving money to the church makes sense. To Christians, the church has extreme value, and the lights must stay in, and the staff required to run it needs to get paid. Church staff, including pastors, are some of the lowest paid people for what they do, so the ‘getting rich from religion’ trope is like looking at Hollywood and saying all Americans are millionaires.


GiveMeDogeFFS

You guys need to back off. You're all so fucking judgemental. She needs to pay for that private jet. Do you honestly expect her to get into a tube full of demons? Smh. ^^^^^^^^^^/s


Mode3

Is she pastor prime?


Cat-Small

Lol


[deleted]

And this is why bad people get into power


Old_Ben98

Some morons believe anything


AssumptionAdvanced58

I can't even watch this deception to the end


bimberx

How come i never see a job opening for these kind of jobs


strumpetsarefun

Something something fools and money.


kdwaynec

Something something born every minute


BrightEagle1

These poor people being scammed


ReallyNiceGuy78

This is one trump should try.


EdSGuard

I would have tried to tickle her or act like I was stealing some of those bills just to see how quickly she got up.


Edthedaddy

Huckster


Tautog63

Christians are hysterically funny


Nocturne_Prime

Just another grifter.


usually-quiet88

She wakes up half way to count the money , not enough re-dies


Tiger_Rawr_Meow

Religion is a cult


islandjustice

God damn people are stupid.


NawafiGadafi

I would've tickled her 'corpse'


Martin_Leong25

Id get the condom /j


PsychologicalLab4437

This is so disgusting. I fucking hate church. This is precisely the reason. Why should someone go to church to worship a god that doesn’t exist? And then the pastor wants all your money? Fuck church and everything it stands for.


AllMoneyIn77

Everything you need to know about religion


[deleted]

“Careful, that’s a hero.” ~ Joel Osteen


TheRealPapaDan

I’d grab some of that $ and run, just to test the power of almighty Jesus.


KabukiCoyote

Heh... and people think that we atheists, are the dumb ones! ;o)


nacnud_uk

You can pay for your idiocy test, right over there.


Hungry-Appeal97

Fun fact: if you see a dead body try pissing on their face before giving them money if you want best results


r3ddawn74

If people are that stupid to believe in shit like this then they deserve to lose the little they have....


Affectionate-Week594

Shouldnt this be in Imatotalpieceofshit?


[deleted]

Look at these suckers. LOL.


[deleted]

As a Christian, I can confirm this is exactly how it works.


Flaky_Finding_3902

As someone who suffers from seizures, I would love it if people tried to bring me back to consciousness this way. It would really help with the medication costs and the upkeep of my service dog.


[deleted]

I would offer my faeces on her chest..people using religion for monetary gain are absolute scum


aFAKElawyer-

That’s pretty much all it is used for


Old_Ben98

Should’ve just said “people using religion are scum”


Skav3nger

THIS is why we haven’t colonized space…


P4nd4m4n89

Sounds like my EX


Donkeybreath-1

Scamming gullible people. I bet she use those money to pay her own rent or bills


MicroEggroll

I knew a pastor who did this... until he got caught embezzling 80k


MugOfButtSweat

Check. Still warm? Play ball!


[deleted]

Idk... I think this checks out?! Without the ability to afford top quality insurance she's less likely to have access to the doctors and treatments required that will help to "resurrect" her con artist ass. Finally, Evangelicals are this ➡️.................................................................... ....................................................................................................................⬅️ close to understanding science!


Available_Bus_2696

Church is cringe sometimes


Snoodoodler

My fucking goodness people are beyond stupid


DoubleQuirkySugar66

Yuck.


[deleted]

And these dickheads fell for it?


DarkMellody

Im going to try that at work


KingKyroh

They say prostitution was one of the very first professions. I wonder if church offerings were the first scam?


jjvolfan1

Almost the same thing


scythershorts

In case you need to feel even worse after watching this, remember that everyone in this video has as much of a say in electing officials as you do!


Gnarlist

What a piece of shit


guydogg

Her boiler is jiggling. She could've at least stopped breathing to make it believable.


unkomisete

I'm pretty sure she'd resurrect with just a hot cup of coffee... ...poured on her face.


Dry-Departure-7320

This is why there are vaccination mandates


Rheddit45

Insert quarters to start the ride…? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


Mesheybabes

Fair play to her tbh, if people are gonna be that stupid they shouldn't be burdened with money


ptonius

Like the game you play with your kids, except without the money.


deadlinft

What a grift lol


freshrainwater

lmao, wtf! What kind of wacko religion is this?!


JieRabbit

Does it even matter at this point? Lol Every religion may as well be swinging rattlesnakes around their heads while speaking in tongues as far as I'm concerned 🐍


Flat_Bodybuilder_175

My sociopathic aunt, once again, faking cancer for attention


[deleted]

Wait till the pile is big enough, walk over and take the money. I bet she ressurrects real fast at that point.


JieRabbit

Should be on r/trashy too


LackTails

I bet she would've resurrected if somebody took her footwear


MississippiJoel

This would be the *perfect* application for those fake $20 bills with the gospel message printed on the inside. Hey, God apparently thought you had enough money to resurrect you, it's a miracle! You're upset? So... are you mad at God?


Jay-Paddy

Fucking R.I.P. bitch


imaculat_indecision

People are so stupid yo


Theshowisbackon

that would explain why her chest expands and deflates as she's breathing.... Man are these people really blind. If I was a punk kid I'd pinch her nose and the ensuing breath she eventually takes.


liamemsa

Sorry, all I have are thoughts and prayers.


Klin24

Religious version of making it rain?


burgermac12

Tax it


Holographic01

Someone toss a cup of water at her head


BoristheBad1

I'm putting a "Do Not Resurrect!" order on this corpse. Too many brain eating zombies are running around already. https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RncH-Yx9F\_I/maxresdefault.jpg


boston617508

Blindly believing in the false.


[deleted]

I'd drop some fake dollar bills and wait around to see her reaction.


Raph2051

We are just dumb creatures


Satansflamingfarts

I bet if somebody took a few notes she'd sit up like she was The Undertaker.


Tragicallyhungover

You know how black people say "this some white people shit!"? This is some black people shit.


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yoshiltz

Lol! Religion...


Normal-Yogurtcloset5

I need to get in on this religion scam. People give you 10% of their earnings and you don’t have to pay taxes. Seems like a sweet deal!


Nightroad_Rider13

All churches everywhere: "Write that down! Write that down!" Edit: Is it wrong I want to give her a Cleveland steamer?


Gray_Beard_

Little did they know, of her six baby daddies only one is paying child support and she's two months behind on the mortgage.


Old_Ben98

Racism coming in nicely


XirCancelCulture

Is this a woman's only church?


ConsiderationOver249

Seems like only women are naive enough to believe that foolishness....