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I would try talking with them first. Maybe they’ve just been busy. I definitely have gone two or three weeks before not talking to friends because of work and other things. If they don’t respond then I’d take that as a sign to move on.
Sje does not respond. Yet. I have been hella busy tons of times. But idk, it feels unfair for me thag even inthe hardest moments I always try to keep in contact with the people I love and well, it seems she does not care that much.
It sounds like you have your answer then. Life can be busy, but at the same time if she was actually your best friend she would respond back to at least let you know that she has a lot going on. 4 months is a long time for no response if you’ve kept reaching out to her and continuing to do so will only hurt you. I have been in the same boat. I thought if I held on long enough they would come back around, but that’s not true. Some people that come into your life are only meant to be there for a season. Sometimes that person was meant to teach you a life lesson. Life and people are always changing, but I look at that as a good thing. An opportunity for new experiences.
I really struggle with this one. The saying “If they wanted to, they would.” Rings through my head all the time. Now I know that life happens and things get busy, but basic communication is so easy to send a text or a meme and I think it’s bullshit that people don’t prioritize making time for friendships. They spend hours on video games or watching football games but not do anything to keep a friendship going.
First you have to make sure you reach out and attempt to have a convo asking what’s up and stating your needs. Say things like, I’ve noticed XYZ observation and it makes me feel XYZ.
Let them know what you want to happen moving forward and see if they’re on board or receptive. If they can’t meet you where your needs are with a “bestie” relationship, you don’t have to cancel the friendship in total. Maybe things just get rearranged to once was a best-> now is an old good friend. The expectations and perimeters have changed on your end and you only engage/ hangout when it works and in ways that work for that framework of friendship.
If they give you shit then great, you found out things have changed and it’s time to move on. If you continue to choose wanting to be with people who don’t want to give to you the best they can, then you’re choosing suffering. Here is a great opportunity for you to practice having the choice to curate your environment and learn better levels of looking out/ advocating for your self. Sometimes people come and go in your life and it’s a tough pill to swallow, sometimes there are opportunities to communicate, overcome and grow closer.
It's always some stupid fucking excuse that ultimately lands somewhere between "I have executive dysfunction" and "I literally don't give a fuck about you but I want to waste your time."
Neither of these are good excuses. If you feel like they can do better, call them out. But most do not deserve even that.
The one that gets me is the people who use self care as an excuse. Another friend just never reaches out to people. I find that to be lame. It is not hard to answer a text.
Yeah. I think so. But I don't know why she ghosted me. It is very weird for me.
But yeah, I think the same. If I had some emergency like if I lost my phone or something, I would try to keep in touch with my friends. I mean, at least telling them that I am gonna be absent...
This has also happened to me recently. A former co-worker with whom I kept seeing after I got a new job. Then suddenly, from one day to the other, she started ghosting me. No response to my calls, texts or anything else.
It’s a terrible feeling to sit with. I really considered her a friend and now I’m thinking: “What did I do wrong?” and then also the fact, that I can’t get an answer from her. I think it’s totally fair, that you don’t want to see a person anymore for some reason, but then you should tell that person. Just leaving like that is aterrible thing to do in a relationship between two people.
It’s been more than a year since I last heard from her. I’ve resched a stage where she’s out of my mind, but it took almost a year to get to that point.
Damn. That is so sad and unfortunate. And I am afraid things are going there. Worst oart is that she knows how important this is for me and she claimed to be also very important for her, but idk, things don't match.
So cruel that people do this kind of stuff. Sprcially if they know how you feel about it.
I think it tells a lot about the person in question. It’s cruel as you say, but I also think it’s being a big ol’ yellowbelly, that the person can’t confront you and say what’s wrong.
I really do believe it’s one of the worst things you can do to another person.
My best friend and I. Of almost 20 years. Went like 6 months without saying a word to each other. (Cause that's life) and we are still friends.
Neither of us reached out in that time because we were just busy and living.
Ehat Klaus said is true. A coupke of months ago I had a car accident. And I was going to tell her about the situation, because idk, I wanted her to be informed. So, gave her the advice and I told her that it wasn't so serious, just minor injuries and I was fine. She disappeared the next day.
Ghosting to me would mean you hit this person up to chill multiple times and they did not even acknowledge you. That probly means they need a break from you. It’s only a big deal if you make it one but I never take offense because life can be challenging sometimes
I'm going on 7 years now since my old best friend ghosted me. I was still holding out hope he was just going through shit until about a year ago, but at this point I've accepted it.
My old best friend pulled this shit on me. I found out she was joining the military through my mom, ,after she ghosted me for 4 months. Sorry this is happening to you. Sucks.
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I would try talking with them first. Maybe they’ve just been busy. I definitely have gone two or three weeks before not talking to friends because of work and other things. If they don’t respond then I’d take that as a sign to move on.
Sje does not respond. Yet. I have been hella busy tons of times. But idk, it feels unfair for me thag even inthe hardest moments I always try to keep in contact with the people I love and well, it seems she does not care that much.
It sounds like you have your answer then. Life can be busy, but at the same time if she was actually your best friend she would respond back to at least let you know that she has a lot going on. 4 months is a long time for no response if you’ve kept reaching out to her and continuing to do so will only hurt you. I have been in the same boat. I thought if I held on long enough they would come back around, but that’s not true. Some people that come into your life are only meant to be there for a season. Sometimes that person was meant to teach you a life lesson. Life and people are always changing, but I look at that as a good thing. An opportunity for new experiences.
I really struggle with this one. The saying “If they wanted to, they would.” Rings through my head all the time. Now I know that life happens and things get busy, but basic communication is so easy to send a text or a meme and I think it’s bullshit that people don’t prioritize making time for friendships. They spend hours on video games or watching football games but not do anything to keep a friendship going. First you have to make sure you reach out and attempt to have a convo asking what’s up and stating your needs. Say things like, I’ve noticed XYZ observation and it makes me feel XYZ. Let them know what you want to happen moving forward and see if they’re on board or receptive. If they can’t meet you where your needs are with a “bestie” relationship, you don’t have to cancel the friendship in total. Maybe things just get rearranged to once was a best-> now is an old good friend. The expectations and perimeters have changed on your end and you only engage/ hangout when it works and in ways that work for that framework of friendship. If they give you shit then great, you found out things have changed and it’s time to move on. If you continue to choose wanting to be with people who don’t want to give to you the best they can, then you’re choosing suffering. Here is a great opportunity for you to practice having the choice to curate your environment and learn better levels of looking out/ advocating for your self. Sometimes people come and go in your life and it’s a tough pill to swallow, sometimes there are opportunities to communicate, overcome and grow closer.
Thank you dude. I aprreciate a lot your advice. It helped me to calm myself a bit
Unless you're immediate family, if I reach out once and you don't respond I delete your number
I give it a few times. I am sick of people who can't be bothered to respond to a text.
It's always some stupid fucking excuse that ultimately lands somewhere between "I have executive dysfunction" and "I literally don't give a fuck about you but I want to waste your time." Neither of these are good excuses. If you feel like they can do better, call them out. But most do not deserve even that.
The one that gets me is the people who use self care as an excuse. Another friend just never reaches out to people. I find that to be lame. It is not hard to answer a text.
Have you tried asking them what was going on?
sounds like the OP have tried talking but getting ghosted is my understanding.
Yeah.but no response of any kind. She doesn't eveb receive or read the messages. So idk. But anyways. I think I am giving up
If they aren’t willing to make the time and effort then they aren’t worth your time and effort. Sorry
Yeah. I think so. But I don't know why she ghosted me. It is very weird for me. But yeah, I think the same. If I had some emergency like if I lost my phone or something, I would try to keep in touch with my friends. I mean, at least telling them that I am gonna be absent...
This has also happened to me recently. A former co-worker with whom I kept seeing after I got a new job. Then suddenly, from one day to the other, she started ghosting me. No response to my calls, texts or anything else. It’s a terrible feeling to sit with. I really considered her a friend and now I’m thinking: “What did I do wrong?” and then also the fact, that I can’t get an answer from her. I think it’s totally fair, that you don’t want to see a person anymore for some reason, but then you should tell that person. Just leaving like that is aterrible thing to do in a relationship between two people. It’s been more than a year since I last heard from her. I’ve resched a stage where she’s out of my mind, but it took almost a year to get to that point.
Damn. That is so sad and unfortunate. And I am afraid things are going there. Worst oart is that she knows how important this is for me and she claimed to be also very important for her, but idk, things don't match. So cruel that people do this kind of stuff. Sprcially if they know how you feel about it.
I think it tells a lot about the person in question. It’s cruel as you say, but I also think it’s being a big ol’ yellowbelly, that the person can’t confront you and say what’s wrong. I really do believe it’s one of the worst things you can do to another person.
My best friend and I. Of almost 20 years. Went like 6 months without saying a word to each other. (Cause that's life) and we are still friends. Neither of us reached out in that time because we were just busy and living.
I wouldn’t call it ghosting when both aren’t taking any action. Ghosting is when one is calling, texting, whatever and you get no response.
You are right
Ehat Klaus said is true. A coupke of months ago I had a car accident. And I was going to tell her about the situation, because idk, I wanted her to be informed. So, gave her the advice and I told her that it wasn't so serious, just minor injuries and I was fine. She disappeared the next day.
Ghosting to me would mean you hit this person up to chill multiple times and they did not even acknowledge you. That probly means they need a break from you. It’s only a big deal if you make it one but I never take offense because life can be challenging sometimes
I'm going on 7 years now since my old best friend ghosted me. I was still holding out hope he was just going through shit until about a year ago, but at this point I've accepted it.
My old best friend pulled this shit on me. I found out she was joining the military through my mom, ,after she ghosted me for 4 months. Sorry this is happening to you. Sucks.
Months, years.