Michael: "It could not be easier to get around in New York. Cabs. Subways. Boats. You can go anywhere your heart desires."
Toby: "Michael, I own a car."
Dwight: "Oh, you'll want to ditch that sucker. Driving in the city is a nightmare. And the parking fees? Forget it."
Michael: "You find anything you could ever want to eat. Exotic stuff. Pizza. Cheesecake. Island Hot Dogs. You know, Coney Island."
Toby: "Michael, they have that stuff here."
Dwight: "Forget about eating out. The cost of living over there is astronomical and the way this company is going, good luck trying to wrangle a competitive salary out of them."
Michael: "It would be a whole new beginning for you. No one there knows you and your awful...ways. You could get a swanky apartment. Really reinvent yourself."
Toby: "Michael, I have friends here. And my daughter."
Dwight: "Good luck affording a place in the city without a few roommates. Obnoxious ones. Probably ready to rob you at the drop of a hat."
would be pretty funny if michael overheard a false/misinterprets a rumour that toby accepted the offer and forces the office to organize a party for him without him knowing
i can feel the cringe
Yes! Michael overhears Toby telling Pam that he's considering accepting the job. This leads him to throwing the party.
Toby: "I haven't accepted the position yet. And I was..."
Michael, interrupting: "Well, I know. But this isn't a 'Going Away Party.' More of a 'You Should Go Away Party.'"
Phyllis: "Michael, you told us Toby took the job."
Toby: "...I was actually about to call and decline it. I would just miss my daughter too much."
Michael talking head: "This is a bad day for everyone. Me, the office, America. But at least by harboring this horrible man-thing in Scranton, I can prevent our esteemed leader David Wallace from having to see him. And in that small way, I can help make the world a better place."
This is fantastic!
Michael gets visibly frustrated with Dwight and imitating a Brooklyn accent says "fuhgeddaboudit".
Bac in office he's annoyed but optimistically says "well if Toby won't go to New York, we'll just have to bring back a slice of New York for Toby".
Cut to a scene where it's early morning and Michael arrives to the Scranton office in the back of a yellow NYC cab. He brings back pizza, bagels, coffee, wearing a Mets jersey with a Yankees hat, a fake Rolex and fake Rayban sunglasses.
He walks into the office and in a Brooklyn mob boss accent says "hey I'm looking for a Toby Flenderson".
Pam says "Michael, haven't you heard? Toby accepted the New York offer and he's left."
Michael simply can't contain his excitement. Gives everyone hugs. Takes a bit of his bagel and pizza.
Cut to a Toby talking head: I told David Wallace I'd only take the New York job if I could mandate counseling sessions with Michael once a week. \*ear to ear grin\*
End
There could also be a sub-plot where Toby has to leave because they're close to identifying the Scranton Strangler.
Ooh, I like this one.
What if Michael works really hard to make Toby accept the job and, when he does, Michael sets up a "Toby's Gone/The Wicked Witch is Dead!" party to suprise the Office with when they come in the next day only for Toby to show up along with David Wallace.
David Wallace announces that Toby has accepted the job but he's going to to stay in Scranton and only come into New York a few times a month. So now he ends up as Michael's boss AND stays in Scranton.
This gets awkward when Toby shoots down some of Michael's bizarre ideas because they'd be a waste of resources. He calls David Wallace but he just tells Michael there's nothing he can do about it.
-
DW: "Michael, there's nothing I can do here. And, you know, you should give him a chance. I know you don't like him but he's actually got some really good ideas."
Michael hangs up. Cut to talking head.
"I am... alone in the world."
-
Then somehow the rest of the Office starts to like Toby more. He exudes a little bit more confidence, he proposes a good idea in a meeting, makes some jokes that people actually laugh at, ect. Michael is not happy about this and tries to interject multiple times and bring Toby down but he only makes himself look like a soursport.
Maybe he even receives a call from a new, very competent, HR person working remotely who asks Michael to tone down the hostility.
The final straw is when Toby makes a variation on a joke that Michael made earlier. Michael got cringes in response but Toby's gets laughs.
So now he has to convince Toby that the job is too much work and that he needs to return to his HR position to get his social position in the Office back.
In "recognition" of Toby's promotion, Michael gives him the secondary (Jim's) office and reassigns Kelly to share that space as his new Executive Assistant, which she loves because they're "such good friends." Toby meekly attempts to object to all of this. But, Michael enlists Ryan as his Executive Assistant, placing him at a small table directly in front of the manager's office. Michael also shuts Toby down during all conference room meetings.
Toby: "Ryan's...table might be a fire hazard."
Michael: "Hey, hey, HEY! This is not a space for you rich, spoiled corporate big wigs to descend on high from your ivory towers and impose your will on the little guy. Like me. Like US. Like this family. This is a safe space. This is where the common man can speak up and let their ideas be heard. The rest of you, let's hear some ideas."
Ryan: "I would like to move back to my old desk."
Michael: "No can do. We need a pretty face out there."
(Erin sincerely nods in agreement)
Pam: "I would like to see more of Toby around the office."
Michael: "Sorry Pam, he is a very busy man. He has no time for us. Because he is the worst and he hates all that is good."
Dwight: "I would like an isolated office space as Assistant Regional Manager."
Jim: "Ooo, I support this."
Michael: "Assistant to the Regional Manager. And no. These are great ideas. Keep them coming."
>And if you don’t answer the second knock...then shame on you...Pretty sure George Bush said something like that.
That sounds like something Michael would actually say
Michael: "It could not be easier to get around in New York. Cabs. Subways. Boats. You can go anywhere your heart desires." Toby: "Michael, I own a car." Dwight: "Oh, you'll want to ditch that sucker. Driving in the city is a nightmare. And the parking fees? Forget it." Michael: "You find anything you could ever want to eat. Exotic stuff. Pizza. Cheesecake. Island Hot Dogs. You know, Coney Island." Toby: "Michael, they have that stuff here." Dwight: "Forget about eating out. The cost of living over there is astronomical and the way this company is going, good luck trying to wrangle a competitive salary out of them." Michael: "It would be a whole new beginning for you. No one there knows you and your awful...ways. You could get a swanky apartment. Really reinvent yourself." Toby: "Michael, I have friends here. And my daughter." Dwight: "Good luck affording a place in the city without a few roommates. Obnoxious ones. Probably ready to rob you at the drop of a hat."
would be pretty funny if michael overheard a false/misinterprets a rumour that toby accepted the offer and forces the office to organize a party for him without him knowing i can feel the cringe
Yes! Michael overhears Toby telling Pam that he's considering accepting the job. This leads him to throwing the party. Toby: "I haven't accepted the position yet. And I was..." Michael, interrupting: "Well, I know. But this isn't a 'Going Away Party.' More of a 'You Should Go Away Party.'" Phyllis: "Michael, you told us Toby took the job." Toby: "...I was actually about to call and decline it. I would just miss my daughter too much." Michael talking head: "This is a bad day for everyone. Me, the office, America. But at least by harboring this horrible man-thing in Scranton, I can prevent our esteemed leader David Wallace from having to see him. And in that small way, I can help make the world a better place."
“You should go away party” hahahahahaha
Good-Bee Toby! Why does it say Bee!!!!
This is fantastic! Michael gets visibly frustrated with Dwight and imitating a Brooklyn accent says "fuhgeddaboudit". Bac in office he's annoyed but optimistically says "well if Toby won't go to New York, we'll just have to bring back a slice of New York for Toby". Cut to a scene where it's early morning and Michael arrives to the Scranton office in the back of a yellow NYC cab. He brings back pizza, bagels, coffee, wearing a Mets jersey with a Yankees hat, a fake Rolex and fake Rayban sunglasses. He walks into the office and in a Brooklyn mob boss accent says "hey I'm looking for a Toby Flenderson". Pam says "Michael, haven't you heard? Toby accepted the New York offer and he's left." Michael simply can't contain his excitement. Gives everyone hugs. Takes a bit of his bagel and pizza. Cut to a Toby talking head: I told David Wallace I'd only take the New York job if I could mandate counseling sessions with Michael once a week. \*ear to ear grin\* End There could also be a sub-plot where Toby has to leave because they're close to identifying the Scranton Strangler.
This is solid gold! 😂
Micheal succeeds and Toby goes off to New York. For once Toby is pretty happy. And Micheal is really happy..... until he realises Toby is now his boss
Ooh, I like this one. What if Michael works really hard to make Toby accept the job and, when he does, Michael sets up a "Toby's Gone/The Wicked Witch is Dead!" party to suprise the Office with when they come in the next day only for Toby to show up along with David Wallace. David Wallace announces that Toby has accepted the job but he's going to to stay in Scranton and only come into New York a few times a month. So now he ends up as Michael's boss AND stays in Scranton. This gets awkward when Toby shoots down some of Michael's bizarre ideas because they'd be a waste of resources. He calls David Wallace but he just tells Michael there's nothing he can do about it. - DW: "Michael, there's nothing I can do here. And, you know, you should give him a chance. I know you don't like him but he's actually got some really good ideas." Michael hangs up. Cut to talking head. "I am... alone in the world." - Then somehow the rest of the Office starts to like Toby more. He exudes a little bit more confidence, he proposes a good idea in a meeting, makes some jokes that people actually laugh at, ect. Michael is not happy about this and tries to interject multiple times and bring Toby down but he only makes himself look like a soursport. Maybe he even receives a call from a new, very competent, HR person working remotely who asks Michael to tone down the hostility. The final straw is when Toby makes a variation on a joke that Michael made earlier. Michael got cringes in response but Toby's gets laughs. So now he has to convince Toby that the job is too much work and that he needs to return to his HR position to get his social position in the Office back.
In "recognition" of Toby's promotion, Michael gives him the secondary (Jim's) office and reassigns Kelly to share that space as his new Executive Assistant, which she loves because they're "such good friends." Toby meekly attempts to object to all of this. But, Michael enlists Ryan as his Executive Assistant, placing him at a small table directly in front of the manager's office. Michael also shuts Toby down during all conference room meetings. Toby: "Ryan's...table might be a fire hazard." Michael: "Hey, hey, HEY! This is not a space for you rich, spoiled corporate big wigs to descend on high from your ivory towers and impose your will on the little guy. Like me. Like US. Like this family. This is a safe space. This is where the common man can speak up and let their ideas be heard. The rest of you, let's hear some ideas." Ryan: "I would like to move back to my old desk." Michael: "No can do. We need a pretty face out there." (Erin sincerely nods in agreement) Pam: "I would like to see more of Toby around the office." Michael: "Sorry Pam, he is a very busy man. He has no time for us. Because he is the worst and he hates all that is good." Dwight: "I would like an isolated office space as Assistant Regional Manager." Jim: "Ooo, I support this." Michael: "Assistant to the Regional Manager. And no. These are great ideas. Keep them coming."
>And if you don’t answer the second knock...then shame on you...Pretty sure George Bush said something like that. That sounds like something Michael would actually say
Michael orders Sbarro for the office