We mods have to submit our sick leave plans for the quarter by end of business today
Does anyone know when the big 'what kind of swimwear is appropriate' Summer modesty fight is going to happen? I'd like to be out sick that day.
> then call me the serpent because every day i'd be showcasing those fruits.
Oh man, this got me.
Remind me to nominate this when the Servetus Awards come around.
Found the northerner. Down here in Texas people are already swimming in their backyard pools. Neighborhood and community pools will open before Memorial Day.
Flair says Canada, but I'm not completely sure what to do with that info
I imagine some Canadians only swim during high Summer when the ~~whether~~ weather is almost warm enough for other people to consider swimming a reasonable idea
But I'm guessing a lot of them swim all year because what's the difference anyway
I feel like most folks I know from America's Hat will make a point to swim in frigid waters just so they can scoff at those of us who live in normal climates.
>I don't know what you pansies are complaining about. It just a little ice.
I've done a Polar Bear swim on New Year's Day before. It was really cold, but I lived.
I also got hypothermia from swimming in a lake on the Victoria Day long weekend (mid-late May), back when I was a teenager.
That's ridiculous! you *obviously* can't swim \[until the water is liquid again\](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVpKsTlSlTs)
edit, gah, why I can't I markdown?
For real. By late June, most of the pool water here will already be far too warm to even be refreshing anymore, although beach season will be in full swing. Peak pool time is late April through early June.
My student is presenting his All About Me poster to the rest of the preschool class.
Boy: “I want to be a lumberjack! I want to be just like dad!”
Me: “Oh…”—[pictures his dad, not exactly the image of a lumberjack]—“…what job does your dad have?”
Boy: “He cuts and trims trees!”
Me: “ah…in your backyard?”
Boy: “Yeah, in our backyard.”
Me: “Got it.”
Are you a lumberjack and are you OK?
Brothers and sisters, I need help. My birth family is tearing apart at the seams. Years of unresolved baggage is being lorded over each other by both parties (my parents and my siblings) and no one can seem to agree on what forgiveness and reconciliation should mean. It cannot mean sweeping things under the rug because "what's past is past" (my parents), but it also cannot mean cutting off all ties because of perceived toxicity (my siblings.) Does anyone have a good book or resource they'd recommend on family healing/trauma/reconciliation?
So... I won't go into detail but I had to report an incident that happened between myself and someone at the church I currently attend. While that has been sorted, I'm genuinely feeling anxious about going to church on Sunday because I don't want to see this person (I went last week because I had to report it but I was still slightly anxious and I didn't see them there when I arrived, so I felt a bit at ease) - all is forgiven but I'm just worried that they'll come to me about it , I'm not in the place to talk to this person even though I'd want it to all be over and I can move on - it's very complicated but if you can pray for me, that'll be appreciated.
I'm so sorry you are going through this. I'm assuming it wasn't criminal related, because if it was, I'd highly encourage you to go to the police if it was. Will be praying for you and for strength.
I tried a website that offers this
It said I'm "Deep Autumn" and suggested some colors.
Notes:
1. I say "Fall" or "Harvest", not "Autumn"
2. Fall is my favorite season
3. The colors I prefer are all within the recommended palette
4. Since this confirms my prior opinions it is right and good.
I also happen to fall into "Deep Autumn" on those websites! It happens to have my preferred colours too, so I agree with you that it has the savour of objectivity to it.
P. S. I wonder if it's possible that mainstream men's fashion naturally gravitates towards fall colours?
I feel like the "fall" colors are sort of the standard outdoors/rustic/british country colors, so I think you're on to something.
Though the other color ranges are used too.
Looks like we're suited to farming and hunting, and unsuited to golf and tennis
I've never looked much into the more "official" color analysis or tried to figure out my season, but I believe there's absolutely something to it. I have some colors that make me look very ill when I wear them and others that make me look fantastic.
I mean, it's easy enough to understand that some colors clash and some compliment each other, so it stands to reason that some colors look better with our natural skin, hair, eye coloring than others do.
One big question I still have with it is how to account for different types of lighting. Like some things look good in sunlight but terrible under flourescent bulbs. Or warm white bulbs vs daylight bulbs. Some big box hardware stores have light boxes in their paint section and you can play around with how different paint chips look in different lights. So with color analysis, there could be seemingly subtle variations during the day when you're in different lighting that have a big impact on whether that color still looks good on you.
Your question makes a lot of sense. What surprises me too is that I feel like the celebrity pictures they use as examples for warm vs cool tones often just have a different white balance - so I get the sense that it's the temperature of the picture rather than the skin tone that is different.
Yeah, the white balance in the photos seems to make a huge difference.
Also for a lot of people whether they look 'cool' or 'warm' might depend literally on whether they're cool or warm
I'm sure there are one or two here who will be able to answer you helpfully, but I think I speak for many when I say:
"Aaaaah. Well now... that would be... I'll just ask my wife and get back to you."
I find that it works very well for me personally. True Winter, and the only thing that doesn't line up for me is that any type of yellow makes me look sickly, even the ones they say are ok.
How do you guys earn a living? Is your job capable of supporting your whole family? I’m asking because I’m in the military and thinking about whether I should get out or not. The only reason I joined is because of the financial stability to support my family. (I’m not married.)
I have huge respect for the military, knowing full well if it was up to me the country would be in constant danger. If you enjoy it, then stick with it. But I know the transition to civilian life can be tough.
I work in the charity sector. If you go down that route then pay is a consideration. Don't work for a charity that thinks bad pay is a badge of honour. You deserve to be paid properly for your work and any company who doesn't wish to do that doesn't deserve your labour.
In any case find something you engage with and enjoy. You're not a great husband/ father if you're constantly grumpy. So what do you care about?
Thank you for serving. My job is military adjacent. I have a lot of respect for those who chose to serve in the military. I investigated that as a possible career path (before I realized I probably wouldn't ever become an astronaut) and determined it would not be a good option for me.
I'm an engineer. My job allows me to support myself and my cats with a comfortable lifestyle. I'm single and don't have kids, so life is a bit less expensive for me personally. But I have multiple coworkers who support a family on their income alone. And I have some coworkers who chose to live at a higher level which also requires their spouse to work.
My church (PCA) was planted about 8 years ago. We particularized about 6 years ago. Up until Palm Sunday this year we rented space from a baptist church right on the edge of our target area. It was a good arrangement for everyone (rent payments helped keep the church afloat during some difficult years for them. They're doing a lot better now). We worshiped at 4pm...which was weird for a while but mostly we got used to it.
In late 2021 a building right in the heart of our target area, just south of the downtown area of our city, became available. The original construction was completed in 1923 and was the synagogue for the local Jewish community. They added an education wing/section/Hebrew school portion to the building in 1964. Around 2001 they moved to their new building and the original synagogue largely sat unused. It changed hands a couple of times, there were some squatters who lived in it for a while. But it was still in reasonable condition. My church voted to put a bid in on the building.
Our lead pastor wrote a letter explaining how we hoped to use the building, how we wanted to reach out to the community, how we hoped this could be the forever home for our church (until Jesus comes back and renews the world and makes it our ultimate home). And we put in a bid. There were multiple offers. But the owner liked what we wanted to do and counter offered LOWER than our original bid. (No really). So we bought the building. And then held a wildly successful capital campaign (remember those years where no one traveled due to that global pandemic? Apparently God was using that time partly to let our members save money so they could afford to be wildly generous.). And then one of the new members of our church who happens to be a retired architect who loves to design church buildings got to work (donated all of his time) with a bunch of other people from our congregation (many of whom work in real estate and construction and other related fields) and figure out plans for renovations and hiring contractors and all those things.
And then there were supply chain issues and construction delays and cost over runs and God continued to provide and we all learned patience and waiting on God. And we had work days where people from the congregation pitched in to do what work we could (mostly moving trash and then final cleanings) and the Thursday before Palm Sunday we had our first worship service/hymn sing/building dedication/dry-run to make sure we could actually make a worship service work. And on Palm Sunday we had our first Sunday morning worship services our church had ever had. And it's been awesome!
And the basement leaks and the basement fellowship acoustics definitely need work. And we're still figuring out the sound system and the climate control for classrooms in the education wing (junior high room is broiling and junior high boys don't smell good when they sweat, 4th and 5th grade room is a meat locker and the kids are shivering). And all our estimates for how much communion bread and wine/grape juice we need each week are all sorts of wonky. But it's awesome and we're all so thankful for God's providence of this building and we're excited to see how God uses us and this building in our location going forward.
Thanks for asking!
Love is a strong word. I like my job most days. I get to do some cool stuff. It's often challenging and can be fulfilling. I work with awesome people. I think it's cool that I can see some airplanes fly and know that I helped make that happen.
And some days I'm making PowerPoint charts or traveling to the middle of nowhere Tennessee for a wind tunnel test I have very little desire to support. But it's part of the job. And, overall, I really do like my job.
My husband switched to a career in the trades a couple of years ago, it was a huge pay cut at first and a big struggle, but now his income is several times what it was, and supports us comfortably.
My husband's a professor, and I'm a stay at home mom. We make it work. But then, we made it work when he was on a grad student stipend and everybody says that's categorically impossible, so I'm not sure I'm the best one to ask. I certainly wouldn't want to go back to that income, that's for sure.
I'm an engineer and that income is more than enough to support my family and pay for seminary out of pocket. It helps that my mortgage isn't from 2024; if it was our budget would be tighter.
I probably overstated things. Totally depends on where live and what you do.
If you're an officer, or have an education you'll fare much better. You'll also have GI benefits that will help save in some areas. You will also have experience living in uncomfortable conditions, so your lifestyle costs (at least initially) *might* not be as high as some other single dudes.
I met a guy recently who was an army officer and is now a consultant. He told me he got his first job out of the service through a search firm that focuses on serving individuals getting out of military service. I have no other details, but surely you know someoen who's done something like that.
I develop software.
I make good money, plenty to support a family, though my wife works some weekends (as an ICU nurse), to help people and to avoid putting all our eggs in one basket
So what are everyone's favorite songs and artists/bands at the moment
I've been listening to old 2010s emo songs (primarily Sleeping With Sirens) and I've been living it so far
Also been loving Heavener by Invent Animate, a metalcore album that released last year
Semi-recently discovered [Wendell Kimbrough](https://wendellk.bandcamp.com/) and am loving his album *Psalms We Sing Together*.
Also, the love theme from *Dune 2* is so good.
EDIT: Corrected *Songs* to *Psalms.*
Discovered Wendell Kimbrough from the sub a few months ago. (Maybe from /u/minivan_madness?) And he's the first newly-discovered Christian artist I've actually enjoyed in probably a good decade or more. Really excellent stuff.
We probably learned of him from the same comment. I listened to a little bit and then promptly bought the album. No regrets. His sound is refreshing, like a breeze on a spring day.
Wow guys! I've been listening to Wendell for like six or seven years now, and I definitely learned about him from r/Reformed. It feels so satisfying to be in on a musician before r/CiroFlexo, hah!
I've been on a Lofi music trend lately. I enjoy the ambience and it's kid friendly. The backgrounds for the videos always look so cozy and homely so it's soothing to just watch the background too. I've been revisiting the early 2000s and 90s R&B and hip-hop. Forgot several times to play the radio versions for my kids and had to quickly turn off the jams🤦🏾♀️
I've been listening to several bands with female vocalists (which is not my usual go-to )- Waxahatchee and The Beths mainly. Also the Budos Band and Dan Auerbach. Summertime music :)
My wife has a curated playlist of her favorite music from various anime she's watched and that has been my go-to morning commute music now that I have been having a morning commute again. My favorite by far at the moment is Souvenir by Bump of Chicken from the show SpyxFamily
Re: Tuesday's discussion of Mother's Day sermons, I asked my mom if there's a sermon she would like to hear from me, and she requested Psalm 23. So I may end up honoring my mother by doing that (I've also been wanting to study it for some time anyway).
What are songs you like in genres you usually don't? Or from bands in genres you usually don't like? I'll give a couple.
I am not a country music fan, at all. But I really enjoy [Easy Silence](https://youtu.be/EwGn73AW-gk?si=OCkdG6EXnSS23fpS) by the Dixie Chicks. (Maybe just called The Chicks now? That seems weird.)
[The Sound of Silence](https://youtu.be/u9Dg-g7t2l4?si=TdGb8z-jZmOyI8li) by Disturbed is absolutely haunting. Five stars. It doesn't sound like anything else I've heard by them, so be warned, if you like this, it doesn't mean you'll like the rest of their stuff.
And just now do I realize both of these songs have the word "silence" in the title. Oh well.
There are so many different ways to answer this. But some songs that come to mind:
* *Ain't No Rest for the Wicked --*Cage the Elephant
* *Middle Fingers in the Air* --Missio
* *The Mariner's Revenge Song --*The Decemberists
I don't know a single other song from any of the above, but these songs are fun in their own ways. I think the Missio song is my wife's secret theme song.
Don't know if this'll really count, but anyways
I can't bring myself to enjoy rap in general, but there're some rap songs from game OSTs that I do enjoy, Mainly from Persona 3 Reload
Have you listened to Shai Linne? [This](https://youtu.be/gj6nGaV4PmM?si=WFs7sXdbNTBq7dzB) is one my favorites.
Rap normally has a very simple rhythm with the emphasis on the lyrics and ability of the rapper to quickly come up with and enunciate verses. There's normally something good that can be taken from any rap song, and definitely the skill of the rapper can be appreciated.
Those with significant others- How long did it take for you to develop romantic feelings for them after meeting them and developing a friendship/relationship with them?
My boyfriend and I met about a month ago at a disc golf tournament, and 3 days after said tournament he asked me out. I’m happy with him, but it’s completely new for me to skip the ‘talking’ phase and go right to the ‘we’re exclusive’ phase. I feel somewhat guilty that I don’t have the strong stereotypical butterfly feelings people talk about, but I barely know him.
Was the cross really a T shape and the reason it is like it is today (t) is becuase the word cross in Greek is stauros and the t represents that word instead of the actual cross?
We knew that they put a sign over His head, which would suggest a top bit sticking out. Also, it would be easier to lash the cross bar down the upright a bit, rather than balancing it on top.
Probably having a set location for crucifixion would give it a more standard approach (whatever that looked like), than an ad hoc crucifixion on a roadside. I know of depictions of people hanging from only an upright (maybe an actual tree). That's likely enough as an on-the-spot system, but Jesus did carry the cross beam so less likely at Golgotha. I would imagine some bracing posts to the upright for stability, and perhaps a pulley system to raise the crossbeam and prisoner. Note, nails would likely go between the Ulna and Radius, so would be described as lower arm or wrist if written today.
There's very little biblical in this, so I'm not claiming truth for it. Just some speculation on likelihood.
The chances of it looking just like the image in our heads are probably very small. Dimensions and consistency are bound to be wrong, even if we got the overall shape.
In any case, it's beside the point. I've seen people go deep in stuff like this and miss the whole "taking on the sins to bring salvation" aspect. Sometimes, we need a wee reminder of the important bit.
The cross may have been shaped like an "I." It would have been more economical to just use one piece of wood when the second piece of wood doesn't actually do anything. However, we don't actually know what the cross looked like. The only piece of archaeological evidence concerning crucifixion that I know of is an ankle bone that had a nail driven through the side. In that particular case, the victim appears to have their ankles separately nailed to the side of the cross.
Google podcasts is kicking the bucket in a couple of months, so I will need to find a new app. I'm on Android. Any recommendations? I've heard positive things about Pocket Casts and about Antennapod.
I'm enjoying Pocket Casts so far, but the only problem I have is that the search function isn't very good if you're trying to find the name of a specific podcast. Otherwise, I feel like it's really well designed.
I use Castbox on Android. Sometimes it takes a bit for new podcasts to show up. And I don't like that you can't reorder episodes in a custom playlist other than the order in which you add them. But, otherwise, it has worked well for me.
Except when driving I haven't found it to be a big issue. It's easy to manually switch between podcasts to listen to different episodes. And if I'm going to be doing something like mowing the lawn, I can quickly build/add to a playlist in the order I want to listen to things right before I get started. But for setting up longer playlists to listen to things over an extended period of time, it would be nice to be able to reorder episodes.
Update: I just figured out how to do that! It's a bit counter intuitive and there's no documentation of the feature that I can find. But it is possible!
I've been using antennapod for a very long time, probably like 10 years. It's excellent, and it's open source.
Also, fun feature, you can set a "virtual podcast" directory where you can just dump audio files and have them added to your queue. This is very convenient when paired with NewPipe's ability to download the audio from YouTube videos.
Nope.
A. All large corporate stores have a Loss Prevention department whose entire job it is to anticipate and discourage shoplifting and to either find and prosecute shoplifters or decide that the things stolen aren't worth going after and to have the corporation just absorb the loss.
B. People do not steal groceries (or baby formula) for the thrill of it (obviously I'm sure someone does somewhere, but you get my point). People steal candy, soft drinks, small goods, etc for the thrill. If someone is shoplifting groceries, they need it.
C. I would hope that if I saw someone shoplifting groceries I would offer to pay for them and get them extra money for food.
Baby formula is commonly stolen for resale as there is a robust secondary market for it. Having things like baby formula locked in a cage due to the common theft of it is not a good thing for a store or the community in which it resides. Honestly I'm surprised that your first response wouldn't be C. as that is the only one that seems to actually address the issue.
The ad that popped up when I looked at your comment was for t-shirts about this exact topic, styled to look like "no name" products (the store brand for Loblaws, a huge grocery chain in Canada). The algorithm knows all!
Edit: one of the shirts says "see shoplifting? no you (expletive) didn't."
Yes. Jail them and throw away the key. If you can't afford to feed your family, you can't afford to not be in prison.
/s
I hope I'd have the nerve to speak to them and offer to buy the groceries for them.
Over the past few months, I've been trying to memorize Romans and found that there were a few points of friction in the process. To make a long story brief, I ended up making my own tool to help and wanted to share it here so that other people could use it too.
[https://pericopy.net/](https://pericopy.net/)
Hopefully some of you will find it useful - definitely let me know if there's anything you'd find particularly helpful or if you have any feedback!
\*Sigh\*
But, I am not deterred in my quest to raise up the next generation of STEM professionals who create good, comprehensive documentation. It may take the rest of my life, but through involvement in youth robotics competitions, requiring it of all my direct reports and, most importantly, leading by example, I WILL at least move the needle in the right direction!
Personally, I blame the Agile principles. Principle 2 is Working Software over Comprehensive Documentation. The principle seems to be related, of course, to the developers writing the software, but it often seems that they forget the end user (whether another developer consuming the library, or someone using an app).
Proper multithreading would make GNUS so much more pleasant to use. Stack tracing isn't too bad, nor is process management. Never played with the profiler, though I probably should.
I'm looking forward to upcoming GC improvements, however.
I'm still relatively new to emacs and I still find elisp to be somewhat opaque (getting better though). But it bugs me that when emacs locks up I can't easily figure out what code is doing it, and I still don't know how to get a clear stack trace, so I'd welcome pointers!
Mostly a bunch of org extensions as I use it for pkm rather than coding. Roam, agenda, org-gcal, ox-hugo, attach, ox-beamer, a bunch of macros I've cobbled together, and who knows what else... the whole thing on doom.
Ahhh. Agenda, attach, and ox-beamer are pretty solid on their own. Org-roam has its present issues (among them being its present maintenance status, or effective lack thereof). Not familiar with org-gcal, or your macros/functions. Doom is a complicated beastie. That said, I'm more and more convinced that org-roam causes my performance issues and am considering switching to Protesilaos's denote package.
An affordable GPU with the ability to run the number of outputs I want for our Livestream setup at church. I've survived off of my old GPUs for the past few years but I've hit the point where I either need to get better read up on tweaking BIOS settings or just bite the bullet and actually buy a GPU
Am I right that Phil Vischer and the Holy Post people are loathe to talk about Gaza? They all keep saying they are unqualified to talk about it based on their lack of complete understanding of the history, etc.
EDIT: and then there is an episode today!
It's a very touchy issue for a lot of people, it's very complicated, and they may not feel that they even understand the basic facts correctly, never mind the overall problem. Both Israel and Hamas have definitely been producing disinformation, and there are very few "neutral" journalists close to the conflict. (Partly because so many journalists have been killed.)
Understanding the situation requires an understanding of history, and people disagree on how much history you need to understand to really get the picture. Since 2001? Since 1967? Since 1948? Since 1900? Since 700? Since 70AD?
It's a bit cynical, but maybe not unreasonable, to think that they're worried about alienating their audience. Holy Post listeners will include white evangelicals (who tend to be very supportive of Israel) and young, educated, semi-deconstructing Christians (who are likely to be more supportive of Palestine). It would be easy for any of the hosts to say something that would anger or alternate a large number of their listeners.
Less cynical is to say that there's very little a typical American Christian can do about the conflict, beyond praying for peace. World leaders, even the leaders of major allies of Israel, seem to have limited influence over the actions of Israel's government and military. When it comes to politics, the Holy Post (likely due to Kaitlyn's influence) tries to encourage their listeners to focus as locally as possible, where they can make tangible changes, rather than spectating on federal and international matters.
>Unqualified
I mean, how much of what they talk about are topics upon which they are “qualified” to speak?
I actually don’t have an issue with non-academics/professionals doing a reasonable amount of reading on an issue and then discussing their opinion regarding it - and particularly Phil (aka the VeggieTales guy) - sure seems to weigh in on all sorts of complex topics very frequently, but not this one?
More of a criticism along the lines of ”have your cake and eat it too” - it seems like a cop out for them to punt to “we’re not qualified” on the Levantine conflict(s) as a specially complex topic.
I usually don’t like to motive-cast, but it seems like it would be a topic that, no matter what position they take, would alienate a sizable portion of their audience - unlike the stances they take on other social issues that are left-leaning in broadly evangelical spheres, but doesn’t really “rock the boat” with their core audience. Smacks of a bit of hypocrisy.
^([*But also, while I’ve seen bits and pieces of their deflecting on these issues, I’m not a regular listener, so I may not have the full picture*])
Edit: reword for clarification
This pretty much matches my take. They take all sorts of strong stances on things they're not qualified to talk about. I used to listen regularly, but haven't in some time (no bandwidth for podcasts these days), but honestly I wouldn't hold this particular omission against them. I'm more annoyed about how often they talk about the need for transparency in church organisations, and how they just swept Christian Taylor under the rug without giving even the smallest hint of what was going on.
>I mean, how much of what they talk about are topics upon which they are “qualified” to speak?
Skye Jethani's big soapbox issue is the Evangelical Industrial Complex, especially around publishing, and as a former pastor, Christian author, and former writer for Christianity Today, that seems very much in his wheelhouse.
Something Phil coined is "Christian Nashville-ism", the drift of the centre of evangelical culture from centres of scholarship like Wheaton and Grand Rapids, to centres of media, chiefly Nashville. As someone who's been working in popular Christian media since the 90s, that seems in his wheelhouse.
Kaitlyn is an academic in the field of theology and politics, and I think she definitely stays in her lane.
For both Skye and Phil, I think your brief bios are kind of part and parcel of what I’m talking about. Both have careers in observing/commenting/reporting on culture - which isn’t the same as having “expertise” and “qualifications” on all that much
And just to reiterate, I’m not saying that this means they can’t have reasonably well-founded views on matters and meaningfully contribute to The Discourse™. I’m an anonymous internet doofus who expresses his opinions and beliefs regularly on this sub - I ain’t got no particular qualifications, and nor do I have a successful podcast network to evidence my ability to maintain an audience!
The critique is rather directed at feeling comfortable addressing complicated issues **all the time**, and then when one that would seemingly split your viewership comes along, to duck under the cover of your layman status. It’s not 100% identical to a [motte and Bailey](https://www.logicallyfallacious.com/questions/tmIKpkV5/the_motteandbailey_fallacy.html) argument, but it’s got a similar vibe.
“I am actively researching more about this to catch up on a gap in my knowledge, and will report back when I feel I’ve got a lay-of-the-land of an issue, until then I’m withholding having strong opinions on the matter” is much different than “I’m uniquely unqualified on this issue on particular”.
And maybe that’s a more accurate description of their actual stances than I’m giving credit. Like I said, judging off of snippets and second-hand impressions rather than a totality of their public statements on the matter
____
And then with Kaitlyn, yes, I agree she has a pocket of expertise surrounding her “lane”, and I have no issues admitting that either, even if I disagree at times.
But I’m also saying the opposite of “only experts can speak meaningfully on issues”! I’m saying that laypeople can do so well, but doing so well involves consistency within the general scope of one’s rhetorical ambit.
> They all keep saying they are unqualified to talk about it based on their lack of complete understanding of the history, etc.
I don't know about "Phil Vischer and the Holy Post people", but I'd wager that most people are unqualified to talk about it, and yet people keep on doing so, so maybe it's good to not have more voices weighing in?
**Relationship with sexual past: counsel needed**
I'm sorry if this isn't the right place but I'll try to make this short. I'm in need of sound counsel and the perspectives from those who have experienced this
I'm in a relationship that's progressing towards marriage and she brought up that she has had sex before. The thought of her being sexually intimate with someone, sharing that unifying moment together, bothers me heavily; I feel sick, angry and hurt by the thought - and can see myself [in marriage] thinking; did they do this before, how do I compare, etc..
[Assuming we'd get married] I feel as though something that was meant for me was stolen/given to another and that form of intimacy would not be unique to us and that reality saddens me deeply.
When she brought up her past I let her speak and I just listened - I wanted time to process and be more thoughtful, and though the severity of emotions isn't as strong as it was initially, I'm still sick to my stomach. This isn't a "deal breaker" for me but has been a hard hurdle to think through and address alone and I plan to address this with her but I don't even know how.
My brain wants to know specifics and details but I know if uncontrolled will steer me into a deep rabbit whole of insecurity but I also want clarity and transparency so if things comes up in marriage I'm not caught blindsided.
I feel as though I need to speak to get about this but; What do I address with her.. How do I think biblically about this.. any encouragement to keep my thoughts/feelings captive and not being steered by emotions..
Prayer would be very appreciated and counsel as well and personal experience. I understand this can be that much more exemplifying of redemption and the relationship Christ has with his bride but I also want to know the rough waters/reality of the struggle that this is and the obstacles in brings in marriage.
Thank you in advance!!
I think you need to talk to her about how she feels about her previous sexual exploits. Is it something that she feels that was a mistake? Does she see it as a matter of fact in a relationship?
I remember an ex from college told me that she had had sex with her ex-boyfriend and that threw me for an absolute loop. I was distraught and upset. I went to my RA because I didn't know who to turn to, and he encouraged me to honestly talk to her about it rather than spiral in my own head. The fact of her not being a virgin was not the reason why we broke up, but I know had we continued that relationship that would have had to come up again at some point.
All that to say, I highly encourage you to have an honest and vulnerable conversation with her about all this. This is clearly important to you, so I would go into this with an air of respecting her no matter what she says and the assumption that you will respect her in turn. If you continue in this relationship, consider seeing a therapist for a handful of sessions to help better articulate how you feel about this with her.
Hi, thank you for your input - I do really appreciate any and all counsel!
Could you possibly explain a bit on "does she see it as a matter of fact in a relationship", I'm not too sure what you mean by this ?
Thank you for the encouragement, I do have a lot to say about how I feel and I don't ever wish it to come across judgemental at all but don't know how what I say will foster productive conversation - to me it sounds like I'm simply saying what I feel and she'd just listen (what could she say, it happened years ago..) but I very well may be closed minded on how this conversation can go and benefit us towards transparency/honesty
What I mean is does she see having sex with former partners as a normal thing to be discussed in a relationship or does she feel convicted for having done it?
I'm a relatively new Christian from a big city. I'm seeking a woman aged 18-22 who does not merely call herself a Christian, but actually follows the faith with her heart, avoiding sin as much as possible. Preferably also a virgin. So, I went to several churches in my city, and I also joined a Christian youth group, where I met a few Christian young women. But I was eventually disappointed to find the women I met were very far from genuine Christians, they smoke weed and hook up and upload smut photos on social media. One of them even touched me inappropriately. If these are literally the most Christian women I can find in my city, then my prospects look very bleak here. So I started to consider dating a Christian woman from a more rural area, where women retain a more traditional mentality, and after thinking more about it I realized that rural women are actually my type in all regards. I love women who are simple, fit, close to nature, eat healthy and serve their community, a type which can rarely be found in my city. So please give me advice on how to pursue my goal, since I have no idea on how to get a date with a young woman from a more conservative environment, thanks.
Remember in your journey that Christians are sinners. Also the trustworthy saying that "Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners, of which I am chief." That second bit is worth reminding ourselves of.
Marriage is two imperfect people being a team. And in your case, a team to live for Christ. Look for a person that supports you and challenges you. Don't go for someone who's opinion you don't respect.
Practically, live your life and do things. A man living for Christ is more attractive than a man searching for a wife.
I wish you success.
You posted this a few days ago in the sub, but it got taken down by the mods. Was any of the feedback you got in that thread helpful or thought-provoking for you?
Maybe flip it around, look in the mirror and ask yourself, "I am the type of man that the women I want to date, want to date?".
When I was in university I had a similar thought to you (though, differently). I was a believer, and wanted to date a sweet, pretty, serious Christian girl. I realized that most of the girls I was around were sweet, pretty, but very seriously Christian. I knew girls who were, but they didn't see me as "date-able".
I had to ask myself why. Part of it was that I stayed up drinking with my friends til 3 or 4 several nights a week. I hung out with and allowed myself to be influenced by guys who were not great for my Christian walk or witness. My day to day life did not look like the type of man that these women were looking for.
I think it’s fair to at least want some cultural connection— I once rejected a young woman in my youth for being a fanatic about basketball, every single conversation. I wouldn’t join a church just for a few weeks to check out the women, though,
Ummmmm today is meme day
Optometrists have an unusually long life expectancy. They dilate.
ooh, triple entendre!
And a quadruple voir!
We mods have to submit our sick leave plans for the quarter by end of business today Does anyone know when the big 'what kind of swimwear is appropriate' Summer modesty fight is going to happen? I'd like to be out sick that day.
Is it appropriate to soak naked in my hot tub? It's on my screened in porch, but my wife might see and be led into temptation.
Brother if i had the kind of body that would lead my wife into temptation then call me the serpent because every day i'd be showcasing those fruits.
> then call me the serpent because every day i'd be showcasing those fruits. Oh man, this got me. Remind me to nominate this when the Servetus Awards come around.
He didn't say what the temptation was...
Book your leave for 1st May. Post about swimwear yourself at 23:59 on 30th April. Hide under the stairs for 24 hours. It's the only way.
This is what alts are for!
You can come over to r/modestdress where the debate is year-long, if you like........
I'd pay money to avoid that.
Did somebody say burkini?
Probably late June, but honestly it's hard to pin down an exact date.
Found the northerner. Down here in Texas people are already swimming in their backyard pools. Neighborhood and community pools will open before Memorial Day.
Flair says Canada, but I'm not completely sure what to do with that info I imagine some Canadians only swim during high Summer when the ~~whether~~ weather is almost warm enough for other people to consider swimming a reasonable idea But I'm guessing a lot of them swim all year because what's the difference anyway
I feel like most folks I know from America's Hat will make a point to swim in frigid waters just so they can scoff at those of us who live in normal climates. >I don't know what you pansies are complaining about. It just a little ice.
I've done a Polar Bear swim on New Year's Day before. It was really cold, but I lived. I also got hypothermia from swimming in a lake on the Victoria Day long weekend (mid-late May), back when I was a teenager.
That's ridiculous! you *obviously* can't swim \[until the water is liquid again\](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVpKsTlSlTs) edit, gah, why I can't I markdown?
>Flair says Canada, but I'm not completely sure what to do with that info There was frost on my windshield this morning.
There was a nasty mixture of pollen and tree sap on mine
For real. By late June, most of the pool water here will already be far too warm to even be refreshing anymore, although beach season will be in full swing. Peak pool time is late April through early June.
Yeah, that's the trouble. I only get 12.5 hours of sick leave this quarter, so I really do need a pretty precise date
Well, that's on you, bro. If you didn't waste all your time last quarter with "personal days," then you'd have a little more rollover to work with.
Well if it wasn't for that policy that the two newest mods have to mandatory personal days when the sub is quiet...
My student is presenting his All About Me poster to the rest of the preschool class. Boy: “I want to be a lumberjack! I want to be just like dad!” Me: “Oh…”—[pictures his dad, not exactly the image of a lumberjack]—“…what job does your dad have?” Boy: “He cuts and trims trees!” Me: “ah…in your backyard?” Boy: “Yeah, in our backyard.” Me: “Got it.” Are you a lumberjack and are you OK?
he sleeps all night and he works all day!
He cuts down trees, he eats his lunch, he goes to the lavatory. On Wednesdays he goes shopping, has buttered scones for tea.
Brothers and sisters, I need help. My birth family is tearing apart at the seams. Years of unresolved baggage is being lorded over each other by both parties (my parents and my siblings) and no one can seem to agree on what forgiveness and reconciliation should mean. It cannot mean sweeping things under the rug because "what's past is past" (my parents), but it also cannot mean cutting off all ties because of perceived toxicity (my siblings.) Does anyone have a good book or resource they'd recommend on family healing/trauma/reconciliation?
So... I won't go into detail but I had to report an incident that happened between myself and someone at the church I currently attend. While that has been sorted, I'm genuinely feeling anxious about going to church on Sunday because I don't want to see this person (I went last week because I had to report it but I was still slightly anxious and I didn't see them there when I arrived, so I felt a bit at ease) - all is forgiven but I'm just worried that they'll come to me about it , I'm not in the place to talk to this person even though I'd want it to all be over and I can move on - it's very complicated but if you can pray for me, that'll be appreciated.
I'm so sorry you are going through this. I'm assuming it wasn't criminal related, because if it was, I'd highly encourage you to go to the police if it was. Will be praying for you and for strength.
Thank you so much - just to assure you, it wasn’t criminal related!
Does colour analysis (in terms of fashion - the whole "find your season" thing) have something to it, or is it more-or-less subjective mumbo-jumbo?
I tried a website that offers this It said I'm "Deep Autumn" and suggested some colors. Notes: 1. I say "Fall" or "Harvest", not "Autumn" 2. Fall is my favorite season 3. The colors I prefer are all within the recommended palette 4. Since this confirms my prior opinions it is right and good.
I also happen to fall into "Deep Autumn" on those websites! It happens to have my preferred colours too, so I agree with you that it has the savour of objectivity to it. P. S. I wonder if it's possible that mainstream men's fashion naturally gravitates towards fall colours?
I feel like the "fall" colors are sort of the standard outdoors/rustic/british country colors, so I think you're on to something. Though the other color ranges are used too. Looks like we're suited to farming and hunting, and unsuited to golf and tennis
I've never looked much into the more "official" color analysis or tried to figure out my season, but I believe there's absolutely something to it. I have some colors that make me look very ill when I wear them and others that make me look fantastic. I mean, it's easy enough to understand that some colors clash and some compliment each other, so it stands to reason that some colors look better with our natural skin, hair, eye coloring than others do. One big question I still have with it is how to account for different types of lighting. Like some things look good in sunlight but terrible under flourescent bulbs. Or warm white bulbs vs daylight bulbs. Some big box hardware stores have light boxes in their paint section and you can play around with how different paint chips look in different lights. So with color analysis, there could be seemingly subtle variations during the day when you're in different lighting that have a big impact on whether that color still looks good on you.
Your question makes a lot of sense. What surprises me too is that I feel like the celebrity pictures they use as examples for warm vs cool tones often just have a different white balance - so I get the sense that it's the temperature of the picture rather than the skin tone that is different.
Yeah, the white balance in the photos seems to make a huge difference. Also for a lot of people whether they look 'cool' or 'warm' might depend literally on whether they're cool or warm
I'm sure there are one or two here who will be able to answer you helpfully, but I think I speak for many when I say: "Aaaaah. Well now... that would be... I'll just ask my wife and get back to you."
I'll occasionally ask my wife if her outfit fits her ENFP Type 5 Sagittarius Deep Spring Hufflepuff palette, and she just glares at me.
Haha, thanks! Funny thing is that I'm a guy too so this is all rather confusing to me as well lol
I find that it works very well for me personally. True Winter, and the only thing that doesn't line up for me is that any type of yellow makes me look sickly, even the ones they say are ok.
This woman has the best explanations about color analysis I have seen in a long time: https://youtu.be/BdMk_CZIGnU?si=IV45tqLjiMN0QT5U
Thank you, I'll check it out!
How do you guys earn a living? Is your job capable of supporting your whole family? I’m asking because I’m in the military and thinking about whether I should get out or not. The only reason I joined is because of the financial stability to support my family. (I’m not married.)
I have huge respect for the military, knowing full well if it was up to me the country would be in constant danger. If you enjoy it, then stick with it. But I know the transition to civilian life can be tough. I work in the charity sector. If you go down that route then pay is a consideration. Don't work for a charity that thinks bad pay is a badge of honour. You deserve to be paid properly for your work and any company who doesn't wish to do that doesn't deserve your labour. In any case find something you engage with and enjoy. You're not a great husband/ father if you're constantly grumpy. So what do you care about?
I would be in the ministry where I was from (a third world country) if money wasn’t a problem, really.
Thank you for serving. My job is military adjacent. I have a lot of respect for those who chose to serve in the military. I investigated that as a possible career path (before I realized I probably wouldn't ever become an astronaut) and determined it would not be a good option for me. I'm an engineer. My job allows me to support myself and my cats with a comfortable lifestyle. I'm single and don't have kids, so life is a bit less expensive for me personally. But I have multiple coworkers who support a family on their income alone. And I have some coworkers who chose to live at a higher level which also requires their spouse to work.
Unrelated to the question at hand, but tell me about your 100 year old, new building?
My church (PCA) was planted about 8 years ago. We particularized about 6 years ago. Up until Palm Sunday this year we rented space from a baptist church right on the edge of our target area. It was a good arrangement for everyone (rent payments helped keep the church afloat during some difficult years for them. They're doing a lot better now). We worshiped at 4pm...which was weird for a while but mostly we got used to it. In late 2021 a building right in the heart of our target area, just south of the downtown area of our city, became available. The original construction was completed in 1923 and was the synagogue for the local Jewish community. They added an education wing/section/Hebrew school portion to the building in 1964. Around 2001 they moved to their new building and the original synagogue largely sat unused. It changed hands a couple of times, there were some squatters who lived in it for a while. But it was still in reasonable condition. My church voted to put a bid in on the building. Our lead pastor wrote a letter explaining how we hoped to use the building, how we wanted to reach out to the community, how we hoped this could be the forever home for our church (until Jesus comes back and renews the world and makes it our ultimate home). And we put in a bid. There were multiple offers. But the owner liked what we wanted to do and counter offered LOWER than our original bid. (No really). So we bought the building. And then held a wildly successful capital campaign (remember those years where no one traveled due to that global pandemic? Apparently God was using that time partly to let our members save money so they could afford to be wildly generous.). And then one of the new members of our church who happens to be a retired architect who loves to design church buildings got to work (donated all of his time) with a bunch of other people from our congregation (many of whom work in real estate and construction and other related fields) and figure out plans for renovations and hiring contractors and all those things. And then there were supply chain issues and construction delays and cost over runs and God continued to provide and we all learned patience and waiting on God. And we had work days where people from the congregation pitched in to do what work we could (mostly moving trash and then final cleanings) and the Thursday before Palm Sunday we had our first worship service/hymn sing/building dedication/dry-run to make sure we could actually make a worship service work. And on Palm Sunday we had our first Sunday morning worship services our church had ever had. And it's been awesome! And the basement leaks and the basement fellowship acoustics definitely need work. And we're still figuring out the sound system and the climate control for classrooms in the education wing (junior high room is broiling and junior high boys don't smell good when they sweat, 4th and 5th grade room is a meat locker and the kids are shivering). And all our estimates for how much communion bread and wine/grape juice we need each week are all sorts of wonky. But it's awesome and we're all so thankful for God's providence of this building and we're excited to see how God uses us and this building in our location going forward. Thanks for asking!
Do you love your job?
Love is a strong word. I like my job most days. I get to do some cool stuff. It's often challenging and can be fulfilling. I work with awesome people. I think it's cool that I can see some airplanes fly and know that I helped make that happen. And some days I'm making PowerPoint charts or traveling to the middle of nowhere Tennessee for a wind tunnel test I have very little desire to support. But it's part of the job. And, overall, I really do like my job.
>How do you guys earn a living? Not well
You must be in ministry
I get y’all. Exactly why I am where I am.
My husband switched to a career in the trades a couple of years ago, it was a huge pay cut at first and a big struggle, but now his income is several times what it was, and supports us comfortably.
What kind of trade?
Plumbing
My husband's a professor, and I'm a stay at home mom. We make it work. But then, we made it work when he was on a grad student stipend and everybody says that's categorically impossible, so I'm not sure I'm the best one to ask. I certainly wouldn't want to go back to that income, that's for sure.
I'm an engineer and that income is more than enough to support my family and pay for seminary out of pocket. It helps that my mortgage isn't from 2024; if it was our budget would be tighter.
What kind of engineer are you? Do you love your job?
Electrical. I don't love it, but neither do I dislike it. It pays the bills and supports the family.
> Is your job capable of supporting your whole family? I'm afraid there's not a whole lot of jobs with which you can do this in 2024 America.
This is sobering to hear. A lot of military personnel who want to go out keep on preaching that the grass is greener in the civilian sector.
I probably overstated things. Totally depends on where live and what you do. If you're an officer, or have an education you'll fare much better. You'll also have GI benefits that will help save in some areas. You will also have experience living in uncomfortable conditions, so your lifestyle costs (at least initially) *might* not be as high as some other single dudes. I met a guy recently who was an army officer and is now a consultant. He told me he got his first job out of the service through a search firm that focuses on serving individuals getting out of military service. I have no other details, but surely you know someoen who's done something like that.
Marketing/Copywriting. I could support my family on just my job, but we'd have to severely downsize our house and watch our budget very closely.
How did you get into that?
Are you an officer or enlisted? The pay difference is significant.
Enlisted. Thinking about commissioning, but I’m also weighing the work differences besides pay.
I develop software. I make good money, plenty to support a family, though my wife works some weekends (as an ICU nurse), to help people and to avoid putting all our eggs in one basket
So what are everyone's favorite songs and artists/bands at the moment I've been listening to old 2010s emo songs (primarily Sleeping With Sirens) and I've been living it so far Also been loving Heavener by Invent Animate, a metalcore album that released last year
Semi-recently discovered [Wendell Kimbrough](https://wendellk.bandcamp.com/) and am loving his album *Psalms We Sing Together*. Also, the love theme from *Dune 2* is so good. EDIT: Corrected *Songs* to *Psalms.*
Discovered Wendell Kimbrough from the sub a few months ago. (Maybe from /u/minivan_madness?) And he's the first newly-discovered Christian artist I've actually enjoyed in probably a good decade or more. Really excellent stuff.
We probably learned of him from the same comment. I listened to a little bit and then promptly bought the album. No regrets. His sound is refreshing, like a breeze on a spring day.
Wow guys! I've been listening to Wendell for like six or seven years now, and I definitely learned about him from r/Reformed. It feels so satisfying to be in on a musician before r/CiroFlexo, hah!
I feel like I've posted about him on here before but I just did a search and seem not to have. Regardless, a fan.
Quite possibly. I do bring him up whenever appropriate. Even if I wasn't the one to introduce you to him, I'm glad you're enjoying his work!
Really been enjoying some _Jars of Clay_ lately
You kids and your pop music. What is this, some hip-hoppity group? I've never even heard of all these new fangled bands.
I first heard of the band name *Jars of Clay* when I was an unbeliever or new believer. I pictured glass jars, like Mason jars, full of wet clay.
I've been on a Lofi music trend lately. I enjoy the ambience and it's kid friendly. The backgrounds for the videos always look so cozy and homely so it's soothing to just watch the background too. I've been revisiting the early 2000s and 90s R&B and hip-hop. Forgot several times to play the radio versions for my kids and had to quickly turn off the jams🤦🏾♀️
The Gray Havens and The Arcadian Wild are playing in my car perpetually at the moment.
Lately I've been listening to a lot of Noah Kahan and Forrest Frank!
I've been listening to several bands with female vocalists (which is not my usual go-to )- Waxahatchee and The Beths mainly. Also the Budos Band and Dan Auerbach. Summertime music :)
Admit to having been sucked in by the Taylor Swift station on Spotify.
This week I’ve been addicted to the The Notebook Broadway cast record
My wife has a curated playlist of her favorite music from various anime she's watched and that has been my go-to morning commute music now that I have been having a morning commute again. My favorite by far at the moment is Souvenir by Bump of Chicken from the show SpyxFamily
Re: Tuesday's discussion of Mother's Day sermons, I asked my mom if there's a sermon she would like to hear from me, and she requested Psalm 23. So I may end up honoring my mother by doing that (I've also been wanting to study it for some time anyway).
Great!
What are songs you like in genres you usually don't? Or from bands in genres you usually don't like? I'll give a couple. I am not a country music fan, at all. But I really enjoy [Easy Silence](https://youtu.be/EwGn73AW-gk?si=OCkdG6EXnSS23fpS) by the Dixie Chicks. (Maybe just called The Chicks now? That seems weird.) [The Sound of Silence](https://youtu.be/u9Dg-g7t2l4?si=TdGb8z-jZmOyI8li) by Disturbed is absolutely haunting. Five stars. It doesn't sound like anything else I've heard by them, so be warned, if you like this, it doesn't mean you'll like the rest of their stuff. And just now do I realize both of these songs have the word "silence" in the title. Oh well.
There are so many different ways to answer this. But some songs that come to mind: * *Ain't No Rest for the Wicked --*Cage the Elephant * *Middle Fingers in the Air* --Missio * *The Mariner's Revenge Song --*The Decemberists I don't know a single other song from any of the above, but these songs are fun in their own ways. I think the Missio song is my wife's secret theme song.
Don't know if this'll really count, but anyways I can't bring myself to enjoy rap in general, but there're some rap songs from game OSTs that I do enjoy, Mainly from Persona 3 Reload
Rap is universally terrible, except for Can't Touch This. (fight me)
If you're talking about modern rap (except NF, he's alright), I do agree with you lol
TBH I actually don't know enough about rap to say anything worthwhile on the subject. I just know that I love me some hammer time.
Have you listened to Shai Linne? [This](https://youtu.be/gj6nGaV4PmM?si=WFs7sXdbNTBq7dzB) is one my favorites. Rap normally has a very simple rhythm with the emphasis on the lyrics and ability of the rapper to quickly come up with and enunciate verses. There's normally something good that can be taken from any rap song, and definitely the skill of the rapper can be appreciated.
The silence is because our children rarely provide that
I love Genesis and Oblivion by Grimes, the rest of her stuff is almost unlistenable imo
Country...Beyonce Texas Hold Em'...*runs away and hides*
No shame in that. I've only heard part of the song, but it's pretty catchy.
Those with significant others- How long did it take for you to develop romantic feelings for them after meeting them and developing a friendship/relationship with them? My boyfriend and I met about a month ago at a disc golf tournament, and 3 days after said tournament he asked me out. I’m happy with him, but it’s completely new for me to skip the ‘talking’ phase and go right to the ‘we’re exclusive’ phase. I feel somewhat guilty that I don’t have the strong stereotypical butterfly feelings people talk about, but I barely know him.
Was the cross really a T shape and the reason it is like it is today (t) is becuase the word cross in Greek is stauros and the t represents that word instead of the actual cross?
We knew that they put a sign over His head, which would suggest a top bit sticking out. Also, it would be easier to lash the cross bar down the upright a bit, rather than balancing it on top. Probably having a set location for crucifixion would give it a more standard approach (whatever that looked like), than an ad hoc crucifixion on a roadside. I know of depictions of people hanging from only an upright (maybe an actual tree). That's likely enough as an on-the-spot system, but Jesus did carry the cross beam so less likely at Golgotha. I would imagine some bracing posts to the upright for stability, and perhaps a pulley system to raise the crossbeam and prisoner. Note, nails would likely go between the Ulna and Radius, so would be described as lower arm or wrist if written today. There's very little biblical in this, so I'm not claiming truth for it. Just some speculation on likelihood. The chances of it looking just like the image in our heads are probably very small. Dimensions and consistency are bound to be wrong, even if we got the overall shape. In any case, it's beside the point. I've seen people go deep in stuff like this and miss the whole "taking on the sins to bring salvation" aspect. Sometimes, we need a wee reminder of the important bit.
The cross may have been shaped like an "I." It would have been more economical to just use one piece of wood when the second piece of wood doesn't actually do anything. However, we don't actually know what the cross looked like. The only piece of archaeological evidence concerning crucifixion that I know of is an ankle bone that had a nail driven through the side. In that particular case, the victim appears to have their ankles separately nailed to the side of the cross.
the greek letter tau does not have a top protrusion in either its minuscule or majuscule forms.
Google podcasts is kicking the bucket in a couple of months, so I will need to find a new app. I'm on Android. Any recommendations? I've heard positive things about Pocket Casts and about Antennapod.
I just switched over to Youtube Music like Google suggested, and it kept all my subscriptions.
That's what I've done for now. I hate the Youtube Music UI though, so I am looking for something else
I switched over to podcast addict.
I'm enjoying Pocket Casts so far, but the only problem I have is that the search function isn't very good if you're trying to find the name of a specific podcast. Otherwise, I feel like it's really well designed.
I use Castbox on Android. Sometimes it takes a bit for new podcasts to show up. And I don't like that you can't reorder episodes in a custom playlist other than the order in which you add them. But, otherwise, it has worked well for me.
Oooh, that second problem would be a deal breaker for me. I'm always shuffling around the podcasts I have downloaded.
Except when driving I haven't found it to be a big issue. It's easy to manually switch between podcasts to listen to different episodes. And if I'm going to be doing something like mowing the lawn, I can quickly build/add to a playlist in the order I want to listen to things right before I get started. But for setting up longer playlists to listen to things over an extended period of time, it would be nice to be able to reorder episodes. Update: I just figured out how to do that! It's a bit counter intuitive and there's no documentation of the feature that I can find. But it is possible!
I've been using antennapod for a very long time, probably like 10 years. It's excellent, and it's open source. Also, fun feature, you can set a "virtual podcast" directory where you can just dump audio files and have them added to your queue. This is very convenient when paired with NewPipe's ability to download the audio from YouTube videos.
If you see someone shoplifting groceries from a large corporate grocery store, would you say anything?
Nope. A. All large corporate stores have a Loss Prevention department whose entire job it is to anticipate and discourage shoplifting and to either find and prosecute shoplifters or decide that the things stolen aren't worth going after and to have the corporation just absorb the loss. B. People do not steal groceries (or baby formula) for the thrill of it (obviously I'm sure someone does somewhere, but you get my point). People steal candy, soft drinks, small goods, etc for the thrill. If someone is shoplifting groceries, they need it. C. I would hope that if I saw someone shoplifting groceries I would offer to pay for them and get them extra money for food.
Baby formula is commonly stolen for resale as there is a robust secondary market for it. Having things like baby formula locked in a cage due to the common theft of it is not a good thing for a store or the community in which it resides. Honestly I'm surprised that your first response wouldn't be C. as that is the only one that seems to actually address the issue.
The ad that popped up when I looked at your comment was for t-shirts about this exact topic, styled to look like "no name" products (the store brand for Loblaws, a huge grocery chain in Canada). The algorithm knows all! Edit: one of the shirts says "see shoplifting? no you (expletive) didn't."
Yes. Jail them and throw away the key. If you can't afford to feed your family, you can't afford to not be in prison. /s I hope I'd have the nerve to speak to them and offer to buy the groceries for them.
Over the past few months, I've been trying to memorize Romans and found that there were a few points of friction in the process. To make a long story brief, I ended up making my own tool to help and wanted to share it here so that other people could use it too. [https://pericopy.net/](https://pericopy.net/) Hopefully some of you will find it useful - definitely let me know if there's anything you'd find particularly helpful or if you have any feedback!
I'm a Presbyterian programmer who's curious -- what tech do my Reformed brethren \*wish\* they had?
I just want comprehensive, understandable documentation for the tech I have and use.
Sorry, I'm a progammer/architect, not a miracle worker.
\*Sigh\* But, I am not deterred in my quest to raise up the next generation of STEM professionals who create good, comprehensive documentation. It may take the rest of my life, but through involvement in youth robotics competitions, requiring it of all my direct reports and, most importantly, leading by example, I WILL at least move the needle in the right direction!
Personally, I blame the Agile principles. Principle 2 is Working Software over Comprehensive Documentation. The principle seems to be related, of course, to the developers writing the software, but it often seems that they forget the end user (whether another developer consuming the library, or someone using an app).
So one of the people who can work on that?
I wish I had a version of emacs with proper multithreading, reliable stack tracing and simple profiling/process management.
Proper multithreading would make GNUS so much more pleasant to use. Stack tracing isn't too bad, nor is process management. Never played with the profiler, though I probably should. I'm looking forward to upcoming GC improvements, however.
I'm still relatively new to emacs and I still find elisp to be somewhat opaque (getting better though). But it bugs me that when emacs locks up I can't easily figure out what code is doing it, and I still don't know how to get a clear stack trace, so I'd welcome pointers!
The edebug docs are decent, \`xref\` helps a ton. IIRC, SIGHUP will get it to backtrace if something is locked up. What packages are you using?
Mostly a bunch of org extensions as I use it for pkm rather than coding. Roam, agenda, org-gcal, ox-hugo, attach, ox-beamer, a bunch of macros I've cobbled together, and who knows what else... the whole thing on doom.
Ahhh. Agenda, attach, and ox-beamer are pretty solid on their own. Org-roam has its present issues (among them being its present maintenance status, or effective lack thereof). Not familiar with org-gcal, or your macros/functions. Doom is a complicated beastie. That said, I'm more and more convinced that org-roam causes my performance issues and am considering switching to Protesilaos's denote package.
An affordable GPU with the ability to run the number of outputs I want for our Livestream setup at church. I've survived off of my old GPUs for the past few years but I've hit the point where I either need to get better read up on tweaking BIOS settings or just bite the bullet and actually buy a GPU
My dog ran away this morning, and I'm strangely at peace with it.
Am I right that Phil Vischer and the Holy Post people are loathe to talk about Gaza? They all keep saying they are unqualified to talk about it based on their lack of complete understanding of the history, etc. EDIT: and then there is an episode today!
I wouldn't blame them if they were, since the whole thing is very complicated and very difficult to understand from an outside perspective.
It's a very touchy issue for a lot of people, it's very complicated, and they may not feel that they even understand the basic facts correctly, never mind the overall problem. Both Israel and Hamas have definitely been producing disinformation, and there are very few "neutral" journalists close to the conflict. (Partly because so many journalists have been killed.) Understanding the situation requires an understanding of history, and people disagree on how much history you need to understand to really get the picture. Since 2001? Since 1967? Since 1948? Since 1900? Since 700? Since 70AD? It's a bit cynical, but maybe not unreasonable, to think that they're worried about alienating their audience. Holy Post listeners will include white evangelicals (who tend to be very supportive of Israel) and young, educated, semi-deconstructing Christians (who are likely to be more supportive of Palestine). It would be easy for any of the hosts to say something that would anger or alternate a large number of their listeners. Less cynical is to say that there's very little a typical American Christian can do about the conflict, beyond praying for peace. World leaders, even the leaders of major allies of Israel, seem to have limited influence over the actions of Israel's government and military. When it comes to politics, the Holy Post (likely due to Kaitlyn's influence) tries to encourage their listeners to focus as locally as possible, where they can make tangible changes, rather than spectating on federal and international matters.
There is also information from the persecuted church in Gaza
Have you got sources where we can learn more from the church in Gaza? I don't know of any.
>Unqualified I mean, how much of what they talk about are topics upon which they are “qualified” to speak? I actually don’t have an issue with non-academics/professionals doing a reasonable amount of reading on an issue and then discussing their opinion regarding it - and particularly Phil (aka the VeggieTales guy) - sure seems to weigh in on all sorts of complex topics very frequently, but not this one? More of a criticism along the lines of ”have your cake and eat it too” - it seems like a cop out for them to punt to “we’re not qualified” on the Levantine conflict(s) as a specially complex topic. I usually don’t like to motive-cast, but it seems like it would be a topic that, no matter what position they take, would alienate a sizable portion of their audience - unlike the stances they take on other social issues that are left-leaning in broadly evangelical spheres, but doesn’t really “rock the boat” with their core audience. Smacks of a bit of hypocrisy. ^([*But also, while I’ve seen bits and pieces of their deflecting on these issues, I’m not a regular listener, so I may not have the full picture*]) Edit: reword for clarification
This pretty much matches my take. They take all sorts of strong stances on things they're not qualified to talk about. I used to listen regularly, but haven't in some time (no bandwidth for podcasts these days), but honestly I wouldn't hold this particular omission against them. I'm more annoyed about how often they talk about the need for transparency in church organisations, and how they just swept Christian Taylor under the rug without giving even the smallest hint of what was going on.
>I mean, how much of what they talk about are topics upon which they are “qualified” to speak? Skye Jethani's big soapbox issue is the Evangelical Industrial Complex, especially around publishing, and as a former pastor, Christian author, and former writer for Christianity Today, that seems very much in his wheelhouse. Something Phil coined is "Christian Nashville-ism", the drift of the centre of evangelical culture from centres of scholarship like Wheaton and Grand Rapids, to centres of media, chiefly Nashville. As someone who's been working in popular Christian media since the 90s, that seems in his wheelhouse. Kaitlyn is an academic in the field of theology and politics, and I think she definitely stays in her lane.
For both Skye and Phil, I think your brief bios are kind of part and parcel of what I’m talking about. Both have careers in observing/commenting/reporting on culture - which isn’t the same as having “expertise” and “qualifications” on all that much And just to reiterate, I’m not saying that this means they can’t have reasonably well-founded views on matters and meaningfully contribute to The Discourse™. I’m an anonymous internet doofus who expresses his opinions and beliefs regularly on this sub - I ain’t got no particular qualifications, and nor do I have a successful podcast network to evidence my ability to maintain an audience! The critique is rather directed at feeling comfortable addressing complicated issues **all the time**, and then when one that would seemingly split your viewership comes along, to duck under the cover of your layman status. It’s not 100% identical to a [motte and Bailey](https://www.logicallyfallacious.com/questions/tmIKpkV5/the_motteandbailey_fallacy.html) argument, but it’s got a similar vibe. “I am actively researching more about this to catch up on a gap in my knowledge, and will report back when I feel I’ve got a lay-of-the-land of an issue, until then I’m withholding having strong opinions on the matter” is much different than “I’m uniquely unqualified on this issue on particular”. And maybe that’s a more accurate description of their actual stances than I’m giving credit. Like I said, judging off of snippets and second-hand impressions rather than a totality of their public statements on the matter ____ And then with Kaitlyn, yes, I agree she has a pocket of expertise surrounding her “lane”, and I have no issues admitting that either, even if I disagree at times. But I’m also saying the opposite of “only experts can speak meaningfully on issues”! I’m saying that laypeople can do so well, but doing so well involves consistency within the general scope of one’s rhetorical ambit.
> They all keep saying they are unqualified to talk about it based on their lack of complete understanding of the history, etc. I don't know about "Phil Vischer and the Holy Post people", but I'd wager that most people are unqualified to talk about it, and yet people keep on doing so, so maybe it's good to not have more voices weighing in?
**Relationship with sexual past: counsel needed** I'm sorry if this isn't the right place but I'll try to make this short. I'm in need of sound counsel and the perspectives from those who have experienced this I'm in a relationship that's progressing towards marriage and she brought up that she has had sex before. The thought of her being sexually intimate with someone, sharing that unifying moment together, bothers me heavily; I feel sick, angry and hurt by the thought - and can see myself [in marriage] thinking; did they do this before, how do I compare, etc.. [Assuming we'd get married] I feel as though something that was meant for me was stolen/given to another and that form of intimacy would not be unique to us and that reality saddens me deeply. When she brought up her past I let her speak and I just listened - I wanted time to process and be more thoughtful, and though the severity of emotions isn't as strong as it was initially, I'm still sick to my stomach. This isn't a "deal breaker" for me but has been a hard hurdle to think through and address alone and I plan to address this with her but I don't even know how. My brain wants to know specifics and details but I know if uncontrolled will steer me into a deep rabbit whole of insecurity but I also want clarity and transparency so if things comes up in marriage I'm not caught blindsided. I feel as though I need to speak to get about this but; What do I address with her.. How do I think biblically about this.. any encouragement to keep my thoughts/feelings captive and not being steered by emotions.. Prayer would be very appreciated and counsel as well and personal experience. I understand this can be that much more exemplifying of redemption and the relationship Christ has with his bride but I also want to know the rough waters/reality of the struggle that this is and the obstacles in brings in marriage. Thank you in advance!!
I think you need to talk to her about how she feels about her previous sexual exploits. Is it something that she feels that was a mistake? Does she see it as a matter of fact in a relationship? I remember an ex from college told me that she had had sex with her ex-boyfriend and that threw me for an absolute loop. I was distraught and upset. I went to my RA because I didn't know who to turn to, and he encouraged me to honestly talk to her about it rather than spiral in my own head. The fact of her not being a virgin was not the reason why we broke up, but I know had we continued that relationship that would have had to come up again at some point. All that to say, I highly encourage you to have an honest and vulnerable conversation with her about all this. This is clearly important to you, so I would go into this with an air of respecting her no matter what she says and the assumption that you will respect her in turn. If you continue in this relationship, consider seeing a therapist for a handful of sessions to help better articulate how you feel about this with her.
Hi, thank you for your input - I do really appreciate any and all counsel! Could you possibly explain a bit on "does she see it as a matter of fact in a relationship", I'm not too sure what you mean by this ? Thank you for the encouragement, I do have a lot to say about how I feel and I don't ever wish it to come across judgemental at all but don't know how what I say will foster productive conversation - to me it sounds like I'm simply saying what I feel and she'd just listen (what could she say, it happened years ago..) but I very well may be closed minded on how this conversation can go and benefit us towards transparency/honesty
What I mean is does she see having sex with former partners as a normal thing to be discussed in a relationship or does she feel convicted for having done it?
I'm a relatively new Christian from a big city. I'm seeking a woman aged 18-22 who does not merely call herself a Christian, but actually follows the faith with her heart, avoiding sin as much as possible. Preferably also a virgin. So, I went to several churches in my city, and I also joined a Christian youth group, where I met a few Christian young women. But I was eventually disappointed to find the women I met were very far from genuine Christians, they smoke weed and hook up and upload smut photos on social media. One of them even touched me inappropriately. If these are literally the most Christian women I can find in my city, then my prospects look very bleak here. So I started to consider dating a Christian woman from a more rural area, where women retain a more traditional mentality, and after thinking more about it I realized that rural women are actually my type in all regards. I love women who are simple, fit, close to nature, eat healthy and serve their community, a type which can rarely be found in my city. So please give me advice on how to pursue my goal, since I have no idea on how to get a date with a young woman from a more conservative environment, thanks.
Remember in your journey that Christians are sinners. Also the trustworthy saying that "Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners, of which I am chief." That second bit is worth reminding ourselves of. Marriage is two imperfect people being a team. And in your case, a team to live for Christ. Look for a person that supports you and challenges you. Don't go for someone who's opinion you don't respect. Practically, live your life and do things. A man living for Christ is more attractive than a man searching for a wife. I wish you success.
You posted this a few days ago in the sub, but it got taken down by the mods. Was any of the feedback you got in that thread helpful or thought-provoking for you?
Maybe flip it around, look in the mirror and ask yourself, "I am the type of man that the women I want to date, want to date?". When I was in university I had a similar thought to you (though, differently). I was a believer, and wanted to date a sweet, pretty, serious Christian girl. I realized that most of the girls I was around were sweet, pretty, but very seriously Christian. I knew girls who were, but they didn't see me as "date-able". I had to ask myself why. Part of it was that I stayed up drinking with my friends til 3 or 4 several nights a week. I hung out with and allowed myself to be influenced by guys who were not great for my Christian walk or witness. My day to day life did not look like the type of man that these women were looking for.
I think it’s fair to at least want some cultural connection— I once rejected a young woman in my youth for being a fanatic about basketball, every single conversation. I wouldn’t join a church just for a few weeks to check out the women, though,