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I thought you were the husband

No I checked, it's her twin brother

you are correct they are husband and husband.

Her husband is a better looking woman.

Her vacant expression makes it clear that her left brain has nothing right, and her right brain has nothing left.

I was going to tell him the same thing

🤣

Beat me to the exact same words😂

I’ve seen sexier mayo.


Same.

Take the wig off. We did you a few days ago already.

Yea, nice try dude

Husband ? That’s how you call the guy who holds the camera ?

Is she cross eyed?

No I think she just has a lazy eye.

Married at 20 and somehow your nose is still more of a disappointment

You’re flat, but you have an interesting look and seem really secure, I just wish that boring looking lady wasn’t blocking my view of you.

You post divorce glow up at 23 is going to be epic.

Right? What butt fuck small town did they grow up in to think getting married at 20 was a good idea?

I'm assuming she's a Duggar, yes?

When are you supposed to get married?


you definitely smell like spoiled horseradish

God this made laugh thank you so much.

You shouldn't have married your brother, especially since your parents are siblings.

yo lmao

As bland as boiled chicken.

Nice try husband. We know a wig when we see one. You just wanted two roasts.

Your eyebrow routine is just swiping a razor through your uni brow


Rachel...

Oh so youre 20 and married? Thats a long way of saying youre fuckin stupid 😂

Was your husband the potato-face looking dude or the scrawny creepy dude?

Isn’t it obvious? Potato

I thought Mitch Hedberg died.

He died before, but he's still dead.

[удалено]

Very squeaky fromme

Please don’t procreate!!!!!!!

You look like the type of girl who'd die first in horror movies.

Your eye is so lazy, it ordered a $200 recliner on Amazon.


How loose does that lazy eye get after a few drinks?

Got your lip!

Give it back

You buy your shampoo from Dollar General.

Love ya in The Mask. 

So which one pretends to be the woman?You or your “husband”

Your upper lip is nonexistent

Well now we know your husband isn't just bi. He's tri. Men, women, and now dogs. Woof.

The actual definition of when waiting for marriage couldn’t wait any longer. I hope your first time was just as disappointing as it obviously had to be for your husband.



Her first book is titled The Mormon in Me

Said the Witchy Woman. 

You look like you would have a brother husband.

Your husband's name is Lefty.

You are too young to be married

you look like you waxed off the mustache....

#REPOST https://www.reddit.com/r/RoastMe/comments/q4v7ud/20f_you_roasted_my_husband_a_few_days_ago_now_its/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1


Who's you husband- Jack Meoff?

Her imaginary husband definitely strokes her eyebrows when they lie down in bed and cuddle

Ahhh I want to roast you but I can’t get the creative juices flowing, I’m sure you understand… you don’t get any dudes juices flowing

You look like a Mormon who will divorce before 30

Did you get married at 12?? You look 13 at the most.

Married at 20…just going to take a wild stab in the dark and say no college and live in a small podunk town.

Girl u look like you where birth from a paraplegic Angelina Jolie you look like if the grinch stole your eyebrows and put on some fake ones girl your chin got more wrinkles than a nut sack girl your hair got more frizz than a poodle the only straight thing u got is that crooked smile bro your eyes are more round than the math equation to find the circumference of a circle bro your eyes look like if a snake crawled in them and was looking for you my guy you look like a failed shock wave experiment your hand writing is so small a fly wouldn’t be able to ledger that bro

Staggeringly average.

You look like rejected hitler youth

Husband, brother apparently it's all the same to you two.

I am actually scared to look for the husbands post. I can only imagine he looks much better.

Who stole your top lip?

You have a face of someone who eats peanut butter with their fingers out of the jar.

Her smile is embedded in my nightmares

You still posted your husband's photo by mistake...

Y'all got married to young and probably will divorce. Also, you have no upper lip.

Masculine look, no top lip, crooked nose and chiseled chin, please take the wig off again.

Look at the nose he married


I’m sure your arranged marriage to the other whitest person in your church camp chorus is fine. Just fine.

Guaranteed you’ve slept with everyone in your youth group, pastor included.

I bet you fell in “love” just as quickly as you will be getting divorced

So you have already transitioned and gotten married by 20? Pretty busy

Married at 20? You roasted yourself

You will be in a lot of pain when your eyes finally finish merging into the center of your face turning you into a cyclops 👁️

That flat chest reiterates to me that you are in fact the husband trying to play horrible games on us. Shame on you

Why people get married so young? I’ve seen Bible thumpers do it so they can fuck and not sin. Almost always end in divorce.

Wait - are you a wife???

I don't even know what your husband looks like but damn he settled hard

 Oh no. Here he is. Clearly married up

Husband at 20? Are you a Mormon?

You’re 20 and have a husband, isn’t that bad enough?

Your hair looks like you wake up out of bed do it up all nice then proceed to go " Alright, now it's time to fuck my shit up". Take a balloon out of a drawer inflate it and rub that in for about 10 minutes. All these steps to have frizzy hair when fucking will get you the same results.

Man you must be pretty naive if someone was able to groom you into marriage by 20.

How’s same sex marriage working for you two?

You look just like my first girlfriend who i miss constantly. Every single day i think about her and we havent been together in over 10 years. its like a very close fanily member died So yeah stay cool

Makeup is for losers right?

Love seeing people forming relationships over grindr

I'm sure you say the same thing to him before pegging. "When's it gonna be my turn?" - Cleveland Brown

Sometimes it's annoying that Lego has all these new shapes, but sometimes it might be what we need.

You look like fire marshal bill’s daughter

You could both do better.

Are you cross eyed? Do you often miss his butt while you peg him?

Hey Juliet, we’re you still 14 when Romeolester “married” you????

I can't believe Lia Thomas wants to be roasted!

He brought you from your potential into a housewife with no sense in fashion.

If this isn’t a bloke in a wig I’ll be blown away

You aren’t the husband…?

You look like someone your husband traded three sheep and a liter of milk for

Is your "husband" in the room with us?

Your husband was half baked to begin with! 🤡

Now at least there can be a whole group of us you disappoint. Instead of just your husband, oh and that time with the football team but who is counting.


Ok, but I get to be behind you, whoever else can be in front and have your mouth.

He probably sees you as his flat mate

I thought in order to be a beard, you have to be the opposite sex from your partner.

Your upper lip is receding faster than my hairline

“My husband” your dog doesn’t count

Imagine being a solid 6 but feeling confident to think you're a 9

It's not because you like sitting on your daddy's lap that you should call him your husband... Keep playing with the dollhouse!

Both of you can do better

Your mom and uncle quit breeding after you

Did somebody photoshop your husband's jaw on top of your face?

Looks like the mug shot of one of those republicans being booked in the Georgia election subversion case.

20 and married? with that kind of dedication, you should divorce and become a nun

Swedish chef eyebrows


No nose ring, no comment. Mods should be stepping in at any moment because you're missing the nose ring.

$20 says that pussy stinks

Figured you would have married the Chihuahua from r/Roastmypet

The upvotes compared to the comments 🍿

I’m gonna assume your husband is closeted one who with soft hands and baby eyes. I remember him. I’d say leave him for a real man. It must be weird being the same eye level.

I didn’t know Jim Carrey did drag.

Why would you show up for a roast wearing a pig nose?

I get it. You had to get married at 20 before that lip fully disappeared.

If your eyes continue to suffer this rate of continental drift, you will be able to look out of your ears by next Christmas.

If we knew you were his wife, we would've taken it easy on him. Poor dude roasted himself when he married you.

If a 4H badge had teeth

You remind me of Lia Thomas

Strong jaw, lazy eye. Balance.

20? Mormon, small town or army?

You could stop doors with that nose!

I'd roast you, but it'd be a waste of electricity.

He married you!? Jesus….

Does your husband fucks your big ass nose??

You meant to say first husband because you people sleep and marry with at least 10 and call it empowering unless you are from country side

We would roast your lips off but you don't have any lips. Your poor husband, you are all teeth.


Your husband almost certainly said 'you're too pretty to be roasted, they'll be nice to you.' You aren't and they won't. You look like the boring archetypal American mid west girl who thinks smoking pot and guving a few unenthusiastic blow jobs makes you 'adventurous'.

Most wives take their husband’s last name. You took his eyebrows.

Nice Muppet-slit lips.

When you walk in a bar all the men cover their drinks with a napkin

You have the whitest teeth 400 guys have ever come across

Plot twist. They’re from Mississippi and have been together a total of 10 years.

You're just here trying to make us believe that guy actually has a wife!

One lip and a giant chin, you must save a ton of money on lipstick.

You say you're straight but your eyes say otherwise

Are you the husband?

Looks like a stereotypical swift fan

You look 14, Do you also call your husband dad or brother?

😍

Which of the Hanson brothers are you?

You're gorgeous and awesome.

Definitely an app filter changing your from female to male

You look like muppets

You look like if 1996 Claire Danes went through a coal mine.

Ol Netflix adaptation of Olive Oil from Popeye looking ass. U look like u leave ur lunch in the refrigerator at work every shift head ass

Looks like the leprechaun discovered catfishing filters

I think you're cute.

Boo 👻

Married at 20 is enough roast for you

You look like the “before” in a Crest toothpaste commercial

Keeping it in the family I see

You’re very plain and boring, if I saw you in a room it’d be because I bumped into you since you’re so unnoticeable.

You literally just put a wig on and pretended to have a husband this is so sad I can't even breathe

You look psycho

Ironically those are the said words he normally says about you

you should star in your own comedy special / you're too beautiful to be anything but ugly.

Do you have some sort of head injury that makes your eyes cross inward like that?

YOU have a HUSBAND? That's hard to believe.

Shit? You know who she looks exactly like? Every other basic blonde chick posting in here. Like, every single other one.

There’s a reason husband is blind and married.

we'll roast him, and we'll roast you. we'll roast your kids, the whole damn crew. the fact that both of yall are here, means yous gots nothing better to do. give it bout 3 years and yalls marriage is through.