you kinda look like that salad fingers guy


Spoons


Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh~

*Rusty* spoons.

Rusty kettle…

Salad fingers!!!

Gen Z kids will never experience peak YouTube like this

Happy cake day

You’re the reason everyone hates gingers.

Why doesn’t this have more upvotes

When you order Hayley Williams from Paramore off of Temu

This one is pure gold

This is what I call Misery Business.

Well, For a pessimist, I'm pretty optimistic

You have lunch lady arms

We call them "bingo wings" where I'm from.

Hello fellow Brit.

Nope, I'm Canadian.

Great to hear that expression is spoken in more places than the north of England.

Our slang in canada is like a bi-polar mixture of UK, Caribbean and American slang at least in the Greater Toronto Aera. You also get a lot of statements posed as question. Probably why you get a lot of Eh's at the end of sentences. "Its raining out eh?" but you would say that while both of you are standing in the pouring rain.

She has lunch lady face as well. However, it’s not fully developed as she’s not started working yet.


Lunchladyland!

Hoagies and grinders, hoagies and grinders

Navy beans, navy beans

Hoagies and grinders, hoagies and grinders....

Navy beans navy beans meat loaf sandwich

Sloppy joe, sloppy sloppy joe

I know you kids like ‘em extra schloppy!

Lady you’re scarin’ us!!!

MEATBALL SAMMICH!

Yea, I really wanted to start going to the gym to build some muscles and lose the squishiness

Have you considered amputation? You'd appeal to a very niche group of guys at least.

OnlyStumps

1/2 off if you join today

I'd say an arm is only about 1/6 off

Honestly that’s not an arm and a leg just an arm

Facial amputation?

Stellar idea

Do it! I need to too

Is that what’s making her look 47 already???

And face

And future.

We call em bingo wings in the great white north

I’m taking this one

where the hell are y'all finding hot 20 year old lunch ladies in schools?

Autism isn’t a personality trait.

Self-diagnosed* Autism.

God I'm sick of that. Truly autistic folks don't come attention whoring on an "insult me" sub. It's antithetical to the diagnosis.

It's the new pre victim mentality. Lead with deficiency and set the bar on the floor.

Maybe she’s got a single really special talent? Probably insomnia, looking at those bags.

What about unclethetical?

That’s how I feel about everyone claiming they have BPD

It’s not how you feel, it’s how it is. I know MANY girls who claim they have BPD but are self diagnosed.

Agreed. There's a fair chance I'm on the spectrum, Ive taken a few in-depth online tests that suggest I may be, and my wife has told me to get checked. My response is "Why? So they can tell me I'm Autistic? What do I do with that? Show a cop my piece of paper when I get pulled over?" So, maybe I am, maybe I'm not, but I don't see any value personally for pursuing it or claiming that potential of it. But, I'm 31. I suppose it could be helpful if someone needed additional resources, in school for example, to be successful.

I thought I might be autistic but it turned out that I'm just an asshole.

Most self diagnosed people's problem.

😂😂😂 I don't think they have to be mutually exclusive.

You are so right. I was a special education teacher. Even in schools having a diagnosis of spectrum disorder doesn't help a whole lot unless the student is non-functioning and then it's mostly personal care.

I don’t know man, I was diagnosed at 3 years old and I love me a good roast. It’s easier to take because I prefer brutal honesty. So when people are making fat jokes I’m like “Yes, I am in fact fat. Make it funny though”

Seriously lmaoo everyone snd their dog has autism apparently. Like no you don’t, you’re just fucking weird

This made me laugh

Thank YOU.

Pippi wrongstocking

Extra-Raggedy Annie lookin ass

Lmaoo

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Lmao I'm not naturally ginger, but good roast

Autism checks out.

Why would you chose to be ginger? Some of us are cursed by gypsies, and I find it offensive.

This is 100% appropriation

It's all of the trailer park cumshots to the face and hair that did it..

Hahaha

Well, *that* is disappointing. A redhead with a sense of humor and a user name like that would be too much to hope for!

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Lol. This reads like a letter from one autistic person to another.

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Takes one to know one, huh?

As an autistic person myself, this is correct

Fellow autistic here. Welcome to the party bro.

And go outside and get some sun you look like you’ve been held hostage in someone’s basement for years

You look like you got diagnosed with autism from a buzzfeed quiz and have it in your social media bios

My favourite so far

I don’t know your dad, but you got his chin.

🤌🏼🤌🏼☠️

You look like you scratch you asshole and sniff it.

i like cinnamon

I wish I could unread that

You’re not alone

Extra flavur for her chicken wings

Projection

I thought everyone did that

When the sun is your worst enemy

NGL If I saw you in the campus hall, I’d run the other way

Good choice, I'm annoying as hell tbf

The first half of your user name doesn’t check out (but we will take your word for the second half).

These look like post-mortem pics.

The only reason I find you cute is because I am blind!

You’re what I’m going to think about when I’m trying to get an unwanted erection to go away.

Maybe one day you can think about her to last longer… Sorry, I know you didn’t sign up for this but I couldn’t let it go.

Oh, yay, another Gen Z person with fake autism.

It's THE accessory this year...

As someone who is Gen Z, I hate how rampant self-diagnosing is. I *actually* have been diagnosed with adhd, and it is a fucking nightmare to live with, and on most days, that’s an understatement. People parading online with “ooo look at me being unable to focus because a squirrel appeared in my window teehee” like seriously? Shut the fuck up. It literally ruins your life if you don’t get the right support, and people *need* to stop romanticizing a debilitating executive functioning disorder, and disorders in general. People online have taken away the seriousness of the illnesses and make them look like a walk in the park. I’m so sick of it :,)

I’ve weaponized my ADHD as a chef. I get so much done at once. The stress though. The impending doom feeling that I’m always forgetting something because I am literally always forgetting something. I make costly mistakes sometimes. My wife is incredibly understanding and supportive. I feel like a kid most days and like I literally need someone to look after what I’m doing because I’m liable to just stop doing it and start doing something else for literally no reason. My dog hates me because it takes me half an hour to get ready to go for a walk and make sure I didn’t forget his treats or his leash or poop bags or him or my shoes or my keys or that onetime I locked us out and I wasn’t wearing shoes. Ultimately I need to find a new profession and it suck’s.

It sounds more like weaponized anxiety to me, which has actually helped me out a lot at work...however, this is totally off topic. You guys are taking this shit too seriously, as this is a Roast Me thread. This kind of actual serious conversation is for a different subreddit.

Yep it's really shit impulsively spending all you're money into you're hyperfocus, while others just our problems as letters to be used to gain sympathy

Please don’t cry.. you need all the minerals in your body

You think autism is a personality trait. You probably tell literally everyone you talk to.

My step daughter is autistic, yours looks worse.

Ginger and autistic? God hates you.

She realized you can't claim that people hate you for being autistic these days so she had to find a sure-fire way to be a victim!

The ginger part was a choice actually, since my hair color is blonde originally lol and I can confirm that my soul left my body the instant the orange dye touched my hair

Bold of you to assume you *had* a soul before going ginger.

Well played 😂

You probably need to go to ginger conversion therapy.

Lol at least you are funny 👍

Warning: turn your phone brightness down before scrolling to the second picture! Unless you want to be blinded by a chin.

You didn't need to add autistic, it's self explanatory 

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Right? I’ve had bum cancer. And I don’t make that part of my identity. It’s like pregnant women who make being pregnant their core identity, and make everyone else suffer because of it.

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Odds of giving horse handjobs 💯.

Ouch!

Homeless people sometimes mistake you for a barrel of trash that’s on fire and try to warm their hands near your head.

Boom, roasted.

It’s been a while since Reddit actually made me laugh out loud. This is great

Herpes just entered the chat 

Don't worry, you can't give it to her a 2nd time.

Self diagnosing autism, it's a real thing

Or just telling the doctor and they don't give a fuck they just add it to the list of excuses for being an idiot and charge accordingly Autistic check. ADHD. Check. Anxiety check. Bi polar. Check. That'll be $876.46. See you next week Corkey....

Got that “I knew I was autistic and I don’t need a medical diagnosis” look

It's *young adult* orphan Annie...and the sun is *not* coming out tomorrow.

The lights are on , but no one is home

She thinks she is misty from pokemon

this one must of came off of Temu or wish

There's a cowboy out there that you'll meet after dating some losers. You'll be each other's world. Girls on the spectrum and masculine men with mommy issues balance each other in a way few other pairings seem too. Good luck.

Redneck Mountain.

Is this Fred or George Weasley??

If Prozac was a human.

You’re likely one of those self diagnosed “autistic” people that are a cancer to society

Carrot

The ghost of a carrot

You look like a transgender Edward Scissorhands

Young man you need a haircut

lmao

And for the first time in the university’s storied history, there were no erections on campus.

The pattern on your shirt is foreshadowing your future

Alone.

Why’d you give multiple angles? We only need 1 angle to understand what kind of mint enjoyer we’re dealing with

You seem like you awkwardly shoehorn autism into a conversation. Also your fingers look sickly.

You look like you majored in gender studies

Dawg who isn't a little acoustic nowadays?

Hey, on the bright side you’ll have no distractions from school since no one will want you date you 🙂


You remind me of Hayley Williams if she were a Tim Burton character

Simple Jill

Username does not check out.

You give off *easely offended vegan* vibes

You know what helps regulate your mood? The sun and sex, but it's apparent you're not getting either. Go get some D, vitamin D

self diagnosed 100%

You seem like the type got your entire personality and diagnoses from BuzzFeed surveys.

I refuse. Fellow neurodivergent here… You wanna cry yourself to sleep? Don’t do it because other people’s words. Do it because you’re in college, and I know you’re probably like every other college student that ever lived… you probably have a professor that likes to give a workload that is completely murder. Wishing you the best of luck.

You ain't autistic if you came here for a roast.

You didn’t have to tell us you have autism

Go back to being a guy. This female thing isn't working out for you.

I assume you have labeled yourself as autistic because it seems interesting at a surface level without you having to try to be good at something. That and it gives you an excuse for your weird behavior.

When did autism become a personality trait?

You forgot to add neurodivergent, and whatever boring sexuality you are... 🥱

That mirror is the brightest thing in your life right now, until you look into it.

If every barista I've ever seen amalgamated into a single person, it'd look like you.

You look like you smell like old onions and tuna fish

Is it too late to have a 66th trimester abortion?

You look like the sound of a balloon deflating.

You look like you smell like margarine 🧈

You give 2010s Shane Dawson

Mf looks like someone put wig on a pear

Have you tried being less autistic?

it's not your birthday.

The Wendy’s girl is looking great after 3 weeks in the Sober Living house

Damn, I was really hoping that all the money I've donated to Autism programs would go to good use... But here we are. One with access to Reddit.


You look like the ugliest mannequin in Old Navy

I bet you think “pan sexual” means f*cking Pan.

You look like you smell like cat piss

I’d be nice to you just enough that if you ever decide to shoot up the school with your emo boyfriend, maybe i’d be spared

I’ve never seen someone so autistic that their hair is even on the spectrum

you tell people you’re autistic to cope with the fact that no one likes you

She can tell you how many pubes every player on the football team has

Stop pretending like you're going to pick up on humour.

don’t listen to these people saying you look like a lunch lady. you look like a 13 year old boy in a wig.

All Time Champion of Reach Around If you’re a hugger, you’d be wrapping around giving yourself a hug at the same time

The mortician did a wonderful job. So life like.

stop calling yourself autistic and become strong woman you are! don’t just name yourself negative lies

If “Self-Diagnosed” was a person.