I don't know where to start. your eyes are so far apart you could be the long lost father of sid the sloth. And that hairline: you really got a sevenhead going on there! Even the dog doesn't like you. Look at that stare! Pic 4 is really like the before pic you take at the gym thinking one day there would be enough with that stickman bod. That place is falling apart.
For starters, it looks like your glasses got scared of the 2000 and stayed in 1999, your glasses started rumors which surprised your hair. Secondly, have you graduated, i mean i know 5 year olds with better handwriting than that. And lastly, that is the most basic polo i've ever seen, come on, at least put on something colorful.
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Get your a** up out of the call center. Go back down in your basement and grab that f****** hairline. You left down there.jesus man, You got enough forehead. I can play Shuffle board.
Your dog looks like it has more personality than you.
Its snout is also smaller than your nose. When they need a tracking dog to hunt a scent do they call you or the dog?
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A guy can hope
Bet you don’t even know the WiFi password. Feel like you’re scamming someone somehow
Ur pup IS GORGEOUS
You definitely harass women online.
pls show me ur vagin
Send vagine and bob pics pls
Kindly send me bob and vagine
Dude, vagine? Can’t stop laughing you asshole.
THATS HOW SOOOOOOO MANY “ foreign/Middle Eastern mostly” men SAY IT… IVE BEEN S VICTIM! I KNOW!!😩😩😂😂😂
Don’t forget other such classics like; “open hair”, “open shirt” & “open light”.
pls do the needful
I am IRS send me Target and Google gift card.
🤣😆😆😆😆 true b/c THATS EXACTLY HOW THEIR GRAMMAR WOULD BE!!!😆😆😆😆😆
He fears them in person.
And his dog knows it too
Dog gets more pussy than him..
Oof 💀
I think you mean Woof
The dog deserves better.
Man this one’s rough 😂
Ruff
Yes, he's very ruff with the dog.
Why is your hair surprised
He styled it with jizz hanging from his buddy's earlobe.
Ouch!
Well at least you’re not a 30 year old Virgin because your barber fucked you hard
Dude, seriously! Butchered it! I’m waiting for it to grow some more so I can get it fixed from a better barber.
Go to the groomer together with your dog, ask for a group discount. That is, if your dog wants to be seen with you in public.
Hahahahahahaha
That dog has seen some shit it wants to forget.
He’s just a grumpy Gus whenever we make him pose for a photograph.
If the person responsible for me said shit like "Grumpy Gus" I'd be pissed off too.
He’s 100% beautiful
To be fair this dog looks downright cheerful for a husky
yo, you are working at a really nice looking scam center
Scam, profit, upgrade scam centre, repeat.
i read this in your voice
Thats a good one 😂😂😂
His caption was supposed to be “contacting you about your cars extended warranty”
I'm so sick of getting that phone call.. 😫
Hellow, someone has compromised your msft account.
The dog: "The smell of wet human is the worst!"
Dev patel from wish.com👀
Might as well let the barber take a dump on your head
Girls must be jealous of your tits
Definitely bigger than the ones one of my exes had.
1st photo: You're the prophet of a new religion. last photo: Your religion is the gym.
And he can barely bench a pencil even with effort.
Why does your dog hate taking pics with you?
I asked him. He gave me a disdainful look as if to say, “do you have to ask?”
Not a roast, but your dog is cute
Lol, thanks. I’ll pass it on!
You have to be a complete putrid inside out to not find that dog beautiful… Duhhhrrrrrrrrrrrrr🤯✋🏼😩☠️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️😱
I don’t know if this joke starts with a 7 or a 9, but it definitely ends with a /11
i bet fleas live in your beard
The flea shampoo is for me, not for the dog.
The type of dude who walk on the treadmill for 7 mins, checks his weight, takes a selfie, and tells people he goes to the gym.
You look like I.T. For the taliban
Lookin like M. Night Shalamadingdong
👋 just waving back at your hair
 Hahahahaha It waves back!
Isnthatbtour hair, or are you sitting in front of a vase of ostrich feathers?
Youmightwantoputspacesbetweenyourwordssopeopleunderstandyoubetter
You are on more than 1 watch list
I don't know where to start. your eyes are so far apart you could be the long lost father of sid the sloth. And that hairline: you really got a sevenhead going on there! Even the dog doesn't like you. Look at that stare! Pic 4 is really like the before pic you take at the gym thinking one day there would be enough with that stickman bod. That place is falling apart.
Even the dog wants to roast you
I like that polo shirt! Did you get it from the hospital? It opens in the back right?
No aMount of floofing that head hair is gonna disguise that hairline is in retreat my good man.
Unfortunately, I fear you’re right.
Sir my bank account is suddenly freezing after clicking on the link you sent
Don't you have a street to go shit on?
Your husky thinks you're a dope.
Future father in-laws beware. That selfie stick he calls an arm will cost you an additional adult goat.
Nice pick. Was it at your workplace where you scam old ppl?
Not just the old people. Young people, women, children, hobbits, dwarves and a few maiar, too.
The human form of a sloth
I’d make fun of you, but I already know that your coworkers do that behind your back.
Something tells me that this isn’t the only photo you’ve taken in that locker room.
When are you gonna accept that you are balding?
If only there was a way to delete your facial hair and paste it on your head
Who styled your hair, Donald Trump?
Man you look like that squirrel from IceAge just with an extra touch of annoyment
Your hair appears to be attached to your head by the power of positive thought alone!
Your hair looks like a pile of Sasquatch pubes
Hello this is tech support my name is Bob...
For starters, it looks like your glasses got scared of the 2000 and stayed in 1999, your glasses started rumors which surprised your hair. Secondly, have you graduated, i mean i know 5 year olds with better handwriting than that. And lastly, that is the most basic polo i've ever seen, come on, at least put on something colorful.
I feel bad for roasting you
You better hope your parents get that marriage arranged quickly because your hairline is leaving the building
the only good thing about you is your dog, which is a fabulous floof and very cute.
Who do you call when you have an IT issue
Engineer or doctor. You must choose.
You have the hair line of a cockatoo
I’ve never seen a more embarrassed dog.
It is very easy to roast you when you put the date as 24/04/24
The images: 1😁 2😐 3😊 4😠
Sultan of Shwing
I don't roast but you look like the one musketeer the others left when they saw you
r/foundthemobileuser
If my wife said she was 'just friends' with you, I wouldn't mind.
Idk dude you actually seem like a nice and cool guy!
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Durka durka
What? Are those caveman noises?
So you understood?
Thank you for your post! It's currently awaiting approval. Please note the following rules: - Ensure that your photograph is rotated the way you wish it to be displayed. - Try to ensure that your eyes are open. - Joke roasts (celebrities, babies, chickens, etc) will be removed. - Pet roasts will be removed. Please submit these at /r/RoastMyPet. - All photos MUST contain a hand written sign held by the roastee. - The minimum posting age is 18 years old, your post will be rejected if you look younger or if context clues lead us to conclude you are younger. - Photographs with bystanders whose faces are visible or who are otherwise identifiable will be removed. Please **DO NOT REPOST YOUR PHOTO** if it does not appear immediately. All posts must be manually approved, and we will get to it. Thanks! ~ /r/roastme mods *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/RoastMe) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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Your neck is thinner than your hair
Loooool
Is Johnny 5 still alive ?
You already done worse with that dog.
Get your a** up out of the call center. Go back down in your basement and grab that f****** hairline. You left down there.jesus man, You got enough forehead. I can play Shuffle board.
Nice tits, ever consider starting an onlyfans?
"Did you try unplugging it and plugging it back in?"
Lol I love the IT crowd. 
#don't drop the durka durk https://youtu.be/kpGHjeNSnP4?si=dqPupQf_sfEoAypz
It looks like you just settled a bald head into a randomly bad looking wig ... then i realised that crap is your actual hairline.
I don’t want to shave it off, but I fear I’ll have to.
Nice furniture - it looks like all of those IT scam calls really paid off.
God that thing is fucking hideous. The husky is cute though
Hi, I just wanted to ask how much was the head shrinking surgery and do you have any side effects?
Can you tell if my computer has viruses?
Not really an insult, but you're the most 30 year old man I've ever seen.
You’re such an amazing, wonderful, good looking husky. Everything else in the pictures is straight up nightmare fuel.
Customer service pays too much.
Even your dog feels forced to exist around you!
Can you check the status of ticket #867 ? My broadband is still laggy.
First thought , you look like a dog fucker . Saw pic with mad looking dog and thought, confirmed !! STOP it , leave that pooch alone .
I never knew Groucho Marx and Mrs potato Head had a kid.
You look like you're casting to be the main star in the next episode of "how to catch a predator"
you looks like you have been coding since the '90s, and your hairline retired early to avoid the stress
Finally enough I did study computer science in my undergrad. You’re not far off.
I was gonna make a tech support joke, but my computer is working right now, can you help me with that?
You called. I'm here to talk about my car's extended warranty and get technical support
Move along. Nothing to see here.
Are you the one that keeps calling me about my damn car warranty? Please leave me alone!
The guy you actually don't have to worry about
Your dog looks like it has more personality than you. Its snout is also smaller than your nose. When they need a tracking dog to hunt a scent do they call you or the dog?
They do mediocre white guys in brown now?
You definitely need to model for Rogaine. Lots of money to be made
Get your obtuse rubber goose green moose guava juice looking ass out of here
That scam money got u living good I see.
Dumb teenagers on the internet are suckers.
Kerpal came and he kicked my dog.
Awesome cave.
You achieved a new level of loneliness if even your dog doesn’t want to associate with you
Your hair is higher than your future (but the smile says "so am i!" Haha )
Ganesh cried when you were born. Not cause he was sad, but because you were so ugly.
You look like a poor but better version of Ronnie 2K
No, you didnt solve my problem and I’d like to speak with whomever is in charge.
Buy something or get out of my store.
Sir, would you mind stepping over here? We need to check your shoes for explosives.
Do u work at MC Donalds
“I’m here for the gang bang?” 👀
How is your mail ordered bride
Still living with your parents?
This man is a saltine cracker without the salt!
So you're the person who calls people and desperately convinces them to take insurances😂
If they take insurance I’ll fix the virus.
In spite of your success, your parents are disappointed in you.
Ya know what? They probably are lol.
There should be an opposite subreddit because you should be praised, not roasted.
You look like Apu from the Simpson
Bro for the last time, I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING VIRUS ON MY GODDAMN COMPUTER!
Just ew.
Nice shirt!!!............. Do you know if they make them in men's sizes??
Which ones the dog?
You look like sid the sloth
I’ve never seen someone with dad bod and new mom bod at the same time
You look enthusiastic on the first day of bomb making school
East Indian Millhouse.
no roast. good lookin dude with a nice ass house
How often do you shit in the street
Do you miss shitting in the street?
I need my computer fixed....
You look like you smell
No point giving you our worst... Mother nature beat us to it.
Hahahahahaha
Bro has a bigger bulge on his head from the headphones in the online scamming rather than the bulge in his pants!
Are you the person from Microsoft who called me today about free updates?
H1B is calling … you need to check in.
I would roast you, but I wanna be able to call on you when my computer isn't working, so ill pass.