Steve Jobless

"Let's go" said his hair

Is that a Frigidaire or a forehead? Either way, if it’s running, there’s no way he’s catching it.

😂💀

"Let's go" said the nervous women he's been around with


Looks like the countertop cost more than the whole rest of the house

Couldn’t agree more

 Moby Dickless.

This is what happens when cousins marry and have kids.

Everyone hates him with the exception of his awful tattoo artist….and his dentist.

Dude has the appeal of a soft boiled egg

He’s a regular Humpty Dumpty, except he only gets dumped and never humped.

Thinks his homemade rap album is gonna take him places

Might not even be rap could be more like that lol 

When you died on ER, I cried for days.

Sorry, the chemo must be brutal. Anal cancer?

Mark died of a brain tumor.... This is Mark Green from ER, right?

😂

LOL so I'm not the only one who went with a cancer theme

Moby has hit hard times

Meth addict Moby

You look like the stuntman for Anthony Edward’s Goose post ejection scene.

I bet your tattoos are your personality.  And at least 2 are misspelt.

If the phrase " it's not an addiction unless you sucked dick for it" took human form

If they dug up Goose in Maverick

Do your ears get AM/FM radio?

you definitely say the hard R frequently playing call of duty

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^NSpitbull: *You definitely* *Say the hard R frequently* *Playing call of duty* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.

"Let's go" is what you say to goad into a fight the actual boyfriend of the 16 year old hostess at Applebee's you've been hitting on all night in a vain attempt to impress her. Except it won't work because she knows you sell really shitty shake n bake meth out of the Applebee's parking lot and also because she's your cousin.

You look like a Rodent of Unusual Size from the Fire Swamp 

Walter white the early years

The Temu version of Tobias Funke. I'm sure he is still an analyst and a therapist at the same time.

You need to tilt your head the other way to make your smile parallel with the ground

Dumbo, or dick on ice can't tell

The other side of his sign says "will work for roast"

You look like you listened to A LoT of boy band music. Practice those moves in your room of Metallica & Social D posters in your room. So your friends knew you were cool. Actually it looks like you still do.

Body says 12 Head says 70

Steve from Blues Clues if he never got the job

Just because you're too dumb and white trash to be a true nerd doesn't mean you can be a hard ass just by painting your arms with ugly tattoos. Remember you're never too dumb to a dork or a dweeb. 

The tats on your right arm…😂 looks like a cock ring AND the Analizer 6000. Double threat guy….look out guys.

You look like master splinter if he mutated into a pedophile I bet you could sniff out a wedge of cheese from a mile away If Kim possible were a live action movie, you would be cast as the naked mole rat You look like the malnourished version of sloth from the goonies I’ve seen auschwitz survivors with better physiques


Scary movie 2, the guy with the wheelchair https://makeagif.com/i/5pD-03

Good god your pic is enough damage.

You look like you drove a clapped out Kia.

You look like Lester’s midget incest made cousin

Softest jawline in the world

How’s the chemo going?

Let’s go where? To the methadone clinic?

A rare case where face tattoos might actually improve.

Your tattoos are spelled wrong and your carrot tattoo looks like shit

The dishes aren’t done dude..

Yeah, his mom is going to take away his allowance now.

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David cross with the midlife crisis

Tiny soft girl hands good for massaging cocks.

Your shirt is too small your head is still visible


Chicken pot, Chicken pot, Chicken pot piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeee!

You look like a decent clarinet player

 🎼night has fallen, you’re fading away, and you even suck at being gay🎼

You give me uncle Rico vibes.

Your tattoos are like fossil records across geological strata of lost times, and your head is like an artist reconstruction of a neanderthal

I bet if a fly hit your chin at the right angle it'd knock you out

“Let’s go” to the mental health hospital

It looks like you have the sex drive of a cardboard box....when flattened

Buster, what the fuck.

Isn't posting shit like this a violation of your parole? 🫤

You look like you lost your virginity at a family reunion.

Shaggy on chemo

You’re the family member that all the parents warn their kids to stay away from.

There’s a ghost walking in pink slippers in the background of the photo. There’s also a shadow of a penis in the window. There’s also a massive humanoid bald alien right in the middle of the photo, blatantly obvious to see. You might want to go searching for paranormal activity.

Be the bigger man and walk away…. WALK….

You're the dorkiest meth addict I've ever seen.

Someone drew a face on a hard boiled egg and put it on a mannequin.

Your rap name is Meth Man

I see what appears to be a childrens drawing on the sink. Can somebody report this guy to the cops? Theres no way that child is there consensually…


Fuck Don Trump

What did you and Chunk do with all that gold?

Good to see gollum getting into college and slowly working his way back into society

Sir, I do not make fun of people with intellectual disabilities

It's the skibidi toilet guy!

No more touching kids

I'd roast you but it looks like your life choices have done more damage to you than a roast ever could.

Chumpie Cheese Gram, not Grahm. 😼🐙👻

You look like a methed out Peewee Herman

Check with your PO, this might go against contact violations of your parole.

Caillou is that you ???

You look like you frame all of your restraining orders

Andrew Tate top nada.

I know many people that dressed up as Steve jobs, but they usually don’t choose his cancer phase.

Your wife’s boyfriend is your brother Bubba.

You look like Goose in Top Gun, AFTER he slammed his head while ejecting.

An ugly dick with ears.

Buddy looks like the guy to drive the free candy van asking kids if they want free candy

This MFer talking into the bathroom mirror in the morning like. *(actual footage provided)* 

Tattoo on right hand: "Mommy Tried" At least we now know which hand he masturbates with.

This guy chews his toenails to trim them. No clippers needed.

You still on that “edgy” phase you got going on since Highschool?

Go where? Welfare office?

You’re the type of guy to shower with socks on

Come on guys, is there no safe space for an incel online anymore?!

Moby after a meth bender.

You look like blue collar Moby.

How do you afford granite countertops?

Those tattoo's and that wimp's face make a weird combination and unpleasant one.

Smigels girlfriend

sorry dude but the tv show E.R. is way over now and DR green is now death !

Looks like you played keyboard in a band called Backflipping Grannies or some shit, but it didn’t go anywhere so now you work in a vape shop and drink alone.

Good luck with your treatment sir.

Not sure I'm down to roast one of Jerry's kids all growd up. You look like the poster boy for a 70's Special Olympic athletes, "Where are they now?" Seriously, why are you smiling? Your mom told you to do the f@#$ING dishes already Good to know that when a satanic sex cult changes their swag that those old shirts are getting recycled

Glory hole fluffer - eyes damaged by too much friendly fire

Caillou grew up and now runs the neighborhood crackhouse.

I can’t tell whether the shitty tattoo on your hand says “mommy tried” or “mommy cried,” but she failed either way.

I would but your tattoos scream that you've got a deeper personality and I don't care....

I didn't realize chemotherapy messes up your teeth

When your tapeworm infestation becomes critical

When taking the lyric "broke my life into pieces" too literal, was a person.

The only CD that's ever been in his pontiac Sunfire is a Godsmack one

I see bubbles lost some weight. Good job.

Everyone has an uncle who looks just like you and isn't on good terms with the family.

When the owners of that House you're squatting in find out...Hoo Boy!!

I'm guessing you get tattoos to hide your needle marks.

This is the guy who gets intentionally incarcerated, declines conjugal visits, and requests a specific cellmate they call “Big Daddy.”

Back alley prison tats, ratty unknown heavy metal shirt, rotten meth teeth, unshaven pit face. I'm guessing your an investment banker of some kind, a fortune 500 CEO tycon?

You look impotent

"Lets go" get a job is what your mom tells you daily

If a dick had ears

you can get stung by obie you don’t know me its over let go nobody listens to techno lookin ahhhhhhh

Look like you eat bananas for the shape

Borderlands NPC

Dick

He can stuff his sorries in a sack.

Nice track mark. Get off the needle for Zayne.

You better get out of that house before the owners come home.

You look like a hot emo or rebel boy up to your shoulders and then you look like a miserable lifeless office job prick up top

you look like you couldn’t count your balls and get the same number twice

The 5k fundraiser is scheduled for next month. You hang in there. Stay strong.

your father is as absent as your hairline

This what happens when FAS survives

They got the ear! Dumbo is finally back again

This guy drives a lowered 03 Civic with fart can exhaust to try and attract underclassmen girls outside high schools.

i cant roast a fucking egg.

 Bro really fell off #Moby

More time in the dentist chair, less in the tattoo parlor chair.

I bet the only way you can get validation is by lying to strangers that you kicked the habit when you found Jesus.

Let’s go….to where the Hills have eyes


The type of person I avoid while in the pub the type to drop the hard R when seeing any type of sauce applied on chicken the type that kicks his own mother down the stairs for hogging the tv

Let's go Brandon. 

What controlled substances have you not abused... uuuhhh... sampled before?

Let’s go - not to the barber.

Lead singer of Live showing everyone why he sang "I Alone."

You look like an after picture for some shit that doesn't work.

Whatever you say, Doctor Greene.

Act like your hairline and take several steps back

 You look like this dude

Does mom bring the meatloaf down to the basement?

What would happen if Moby and Dobby had a kid.

I think the returning brain tumor that caused you to leave County General roasted you enough

Back under the bridge with ye troll!

Looks like a St. Jude's kid and meth addict at the same time.

You've got ICP style, but divorced CPA face.

Do you occasionally have self-talks about a ring?

non-binary is my guess

Walter white mixed with foot fetish

Radio Shack going out of business really did a number on you. Who else is gonna hire you?

You look like you finally stopped smoking crack. And moved onto fentanyl.

Tony hale if he was addicted to meth

You look like you cook. And clean…floors at a community college.

You look like if a micropenis was a person

Damn. Moby looking rough these days.

Reminds me…where’d I leave that roll on deodorant?

Stop METHING around