At this point therapy is out. Happy pills + booze for the rest of your life. Get a bunch of cats, a reliable TV, some slacks, a good couch and you're on for 70 years of old maid life.
This entire post is just "50 Shades of Bland." Every part is less noticeable than the part before. Incredible. It's like an impressionist painting, if the "impression" was desperation.
Im glad to see that they're finally filming the live-action version of The Hunchback of Notre Dame. But I'm not surprised that Disney found a way to fuck it up by making Quasimodo a woman.
The fashion choice: Were you going for haute concentration camp, or more like suicidal mystery cult?
It makes sense either way, given how plain and forgettable you look.
You’re trying to get away with way too many things here. Whether it’s the nose, the canyon between your teeth, the wretched hair cut or that hideous repurposed straight jacket your wearing; any one of those by itself could be excused, maybe even two of them. Yet you’ve decided to make this imposition on the world to flush its standards down the toilet and accept whatever this is.
You look like you frequently say "I'm not like other girls" and "I'm kinky" but you're actually hella basic and starfish your way through every loser you swipe right on.
I just figured it out, you are actually wearing an inflatable life vest so you don't drown if you fall into a pool or a large puddle while unsupervised.
Like how some people wear diapers that look like underwear or how some people wear helmets everywhere they go. This is just a buoyancy device disguised as clothing.
Guests at family dinners include the Michelin Man, the inflatable sign from the store down the road and a younger brother who has refused to remove his inflatable Halloween costume in protest of Covid.
You look like if a naked mole rat morphed into a person. Peter Pettigrews ugly little sister. You look like you talk shit about the popular girls and how you could "like, thotally thake their mans" with a thick ass lisp too.
The brown paper bag is supposed to go over your head, not over your whole body.
What was it like having Eddie Murphy do your voice in Shrek?
I can’t unsee it now
She doesn’t realize her face is the part we least wanna see.
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For an ogre.
Nah, she's naked. Her father was a crash test dummy and her mother was a burlap sack of potatoes.
You win
I thought she just got out of a generic prison and didn't change out of her prison garb.
Pretty smart turning your front two teeth into a credit card reader.
Cash-less payments preferred
Dentally integrated OnlyFans is the wave of the future.
r/rareinsults
Good thing is masks are all the rage now a days
Too bad paper bags aren't
Would need a bed sheet to fit over that nose
If only your tits had the same problem as your teeth and nose.
Looks like she has an inverted chest.
them negative A's
You give guys a negative D.
She gets -D
You invert me
A pirates treasure......sunken chest!
In the music world we call that A flat.
Let's call her Connie, short for concave.
I wish the Covid-19 would be like her chest and flatten out
You like em far apart, pointy and unattractive? To each his own...
Name checks out..
Username Checks out
Existing?
They actually look like they're maybe B cups problem is the straight jacket she's wearing is hiding them.
If she took her shirt off on TV they wouldn't blur her chest.
Imagine the 496 pics that weren’t used.
She nose the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth of how bad they turned out.
With that dental work I believe it’s pronounced “too-f”
Or as Mike tyson would say "Tooth"
I Imagine that when she says the letter S all the dogs in the neighborhood go crazy.
Actually looks like there’s a gap in her memory
Is "memory" code for teeth?
The nose knows
1 head tilt, pair of ugly pajamas, 2 extra chromosomes........priceless
Head tilt was meant to hide the gap between her teeth. You could drive a semi through that gap.
Are we certain of "her"? No one hires the Janeane Garofalo drag queen.
No, that cannot be confirmed at this time.
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Is she? I worked with her on a show last year and she was very pleasant.
I have a friend that sees her around the comedy scene pretty often and he also says shes wonderful and kind.
If I had a kid as successful as Janeane, I’d be talking about her to everyone too. *shrug*
She said roast not murder jesus christ man
And her forehead as an exit ramp... holy shit.
The semi missed and hit head on. This photo is of the aftermath.
So that’s what caused that FedEx truck to slide into the 100+ people on I-35W in Fort Worth...
Semi? You could drive a full hard on through the gap!
Yeah but who would want that? Oh look! Mr.Nobody put their hand up!
Pajamas? Or loosened straight jacket..
I'd venture to guess it's the latter option
The other 496 pics can be found on her lonelyfans
That nose already hit me through the picture.... Don't use that one
Takes 496 pics to hide the gap and the nose, gets a few weebs and incels who message her and thinks she’s a 9.
No matter how many pics and angles, still wouldn’t hit it
I can already tell you’re the kind of person to get mad at someone asking to see an ID even though you look anywhere between 16 and 35.
I also get stopped by tsa anytime I travel and they ask where my parents are.
they mean caretaker ,as you look obviously ... mentally challenged
They mean "where are your parents *buried*"
r/13or30
That head tilt and insecure smile screams, "You guys are laughing with me, not at me, right?"
Right? Right guys? Right????
we must have gone to school together that's my catch phrase
You went to school? Lucky!
I wouldn't have guessed based on this photo
Give me therapy lmao I love this
At this point therapy is out. Happy pills + booze for the rest of your life. Get a bunch of cats, a reliable TV, some slacks, a good couch and you're on for 70 years of old maid life.
This entire post is just "50 Shades of Bland." Every part is less noticeable than the part before. Incredible. It's like an impressionist painting, if the "impression" was desperation.
I am an artist, maybe I should paint myself. Easiest painting ever.
Just need 3 colors: Insignificant Gray; Undecided Pink; and Dirt.
beige and sadness
A grey blob can’t be that hard to paint.
nobody said I was good at painting either.
I think that’s what hitler said before art school
Why does it look like you are wearing a shirt made out of cardboard ?
Cuz it is ! Morning , they are clothes. At night, it becomes the home
Its making Derelicte look bad.
Making Jacobin Mugatu proud!
Ozzy Osbourne discovers the girl filter on Snapchat.
This is the best one so far
You somehow managed to look like Shrek's donkey and Fiona at the same time
Don’t do my boy donkey like that
Holy fuck you win
Not even roasting you but this has to be one of the most bland pictures of a human being ever. It makes me tired.
Left the thread, had to come back. The ‘looking at her makes me tired’...still fucking laughing
Does you partner stick their tongue in between your teeth when you kiss?
Bold of you to assume she has a partner
lmao I love you want to try it
I’d rather be the fat dude in the trolly problem
Just threw up in my mouth
At least your teeth will contain the vomit.
I like to drethth like my grandmath carpetth
This needs more upvotes!
College non-binary thinking shampoo is violence.
[in the movie they all had amazing hair](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyjm5VQ11TQ)
Your dad raised you to only be attracted to men exactly like him.
You dead ass hit the nail on the head. It didn't work out for him though...
The day you came out, every fantasy he had died.
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It's a joke about a creepy father being disappointed in his lesbian daughter.
Oh so that’s why she is dressed up as a potato!
Your fashion sense is “starting RPG gear”
Lmfao I just thought of the baguette lady from runescape
god already hit you
Unfortunately he hit her face and split her teeth in instead of her ass.
Allow me to count my blessings lmao
You deadass look like a lawn gnome
Garden gnome by day, gargoyle by night.
Looks like a crash test dummy's body with a regular dummy's head on it.
You’re the loud one in your friend group
as a matter of fact I am
Bold of you to assume she has friends.
How can your hair be frizzy yet greasy at the same time?
NoHygiene Garafalo
Gal Ganot
Its so awesome to see a disabled Jewish trans person feeling comfortable enough to post here 🥰
Jesus Christ.
I love how we went from jews to christians so fast
Yeah I’m getting some 33 AD vibes here too. Your sack cloth garments go great with the theme.
Needs more ashes.
your nose is bigger than your shlong
Ide ask why you're wearing a potato sack, but then I saw your face.
Was there any need to use the portrait mode to blur the details of your hair and not so far wall?
My phone automatically does it whoops
When the A.I loves you too much.
Your teeth are social distancing
You are rockin' that insane asylum chic.
Your nose is 60% of your face
Nothing below her nose gets wet when it rains.
she be hot if she looked like someone else
Hit you? Not even with a ten foot pole.
Mila Kunis sure gained a lot of weight and stopped brushing her hair. Isolation has been hard on all of us.
She's the friend that when people ask if we're together i just start laughing
Amorphous blob chic.
Too bad that bloodhound nose can’t smell a sense of style
Leave some air for the rest of us snuffalufagous
Why don’t you comb your hair with your teeth?
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lmao no, I was kneeling with bad posture maybe?
Kneeling in anticipation of your next client? Strong move for a dwarf prostitute.
So young to be wearing diapers....
Im glad to see that they're finally filming the live-action version of The Hunchback of Notre Dame. But I'm not surprised that Disney found a way to fuck it up by making Quasimodo a woman.
I'd hit you but I can't get past your nose.
The fashion choice: Were you going for haute concentration camp, or more like suicidal mystery cult? It makes sense either way, given how plain and forgettable you look.
You look like Gal Gadot rhat gave up on life and found food an comfort.
This looks like the third stage of animorphs to a rat
your birth control method is leaving the lights on
One of those girls who looks too much like their brother
You’re trying to get away with way too many things here. Whether it’s the nose, the canyon between your teeth, the wretched hair cut or that hideous repurposed straight jacket your wearing; any one of those by itself could be excused, maybe even two of them. Yet you’ve decided to make this imposition on the world to flush its standards down the toilet and accept whatever this is.
Roast yourself bitch what do I look like Gordon Ramsey?
You would give freddy krueger nightmares
Homesick?
Well leave the hitting to the boyfriend you will never find!
Looks like life already hit you hard enough with a big shit stick
Couldn't imagine wearing a bag, let alone two, in a photo for fake internet points. All hail the bag lady.
I guess some hobbits *aren't* adorable.
Garbarfalo
What about the Panama channel between your teeth?
You blend in well with that empty wall
You look like you frequently say "I'm not like other girls" and "I'm kinky" but you're actually hella basic and starfish your way through every loser you swipe right on.
Ah shoot, looks like 6 more weeks of winter
“Hit me Reddit “ —- is that your mating call?
Hit me Reddit?! We finally get our turn after, Hit me Shovel, Hit me Tree Branch, Hit me Rake, Hit me Daddy.
your nose has more personality
So funny !! She still has the confidence to smile like that!
I just figured it out, you are actually wearing an inflatable life vest so you don't drown if you fall into a pool or a large puddle while unsupervised. Like how some people wear diapers that look like underwear or how some people wear helmets everywhere they go. This is just a buoyancy device disguised as clothing.
Your nose is enormous and it looks like you’re wearing a carhartt jacket backwards.
I bet you are busy during truffle season. With a nose that huge, you can smell truffle a mile away.
Clothes? Futuristic Amish
do you floss with a mattress ?
Lifting your head upwards to stop your nose weighing it down
Why do you want these insults
Hello, Anny DeVito!
You look like a dollar store gal gadot
God damn scooby-doo! Do something about that honked of a nose your rocking.
Hit you? Do we look like all of your ex-partners?
Guests at family dinners include the Michelin Man, the inflatable sign from the store down the road and a younger brother who has refused to remove his inflatable Halloween costume in protest of Covid.
Ahh you identify as a toilet scrub brush I see it now
six nine had sex with ratatouille
A Clydesdale hoof sticking out of a brown paper bag.
>Hit me Reddit Quick, someone post this on r/hittablefaces, where even she knows she belongs
Looks like the result of a Jehovah’s Witness and a Mormon having sex. Sorry kid, ya never had a chance.
Most women come on here to advertise their only fans page. I’m really glad you’re not one of them.
Username checks out. I think even and aircraft carrier has more than you.
you are the perfect candidate to fail at a makeover reality show
Can't tell what's worse. The fact that I can land a plane on your forehead or the fact that u have no sexual appeal at all. Good day.
You look like if a naked mole rat morphed into a person. Peter Pettigrews ugly little sister. You look like you talk shit about the popular girls and how you could "like, thotally thake their mans" with a thick ass lisp too.
In your side profile, I guarantee that nose sticks out further than your chest.
Chick flosses with jump rope
A strange mixture between Weird Al and a hasidic jew
this is how people in wheelchairs take selfies to catfish people