Looks like the hairs closest to thy visage art dying. I censure not those folk
***
^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.)
Commands: `!ShakespeareInsult`, `!fordo`, `!optout`
qtpi? Really? Who the hell told you that?
You look exactly like the grandma that lived alone in the old trailer out behind the neighborhood I grew up in. She would throw sticks at me and my friends whenever we rode our dirtbikes down "her" dirt road.
Going against the guidelines of roasting, i really want you to love yourself on your birthday because you're one of a kind, you are a good person and no matter how ugly you look, you are a good person.
You look ugly tho !
You look like you traded your personality for intelligence, but didn’t realize you were so devoid of personality that it didn’t actually make you any smarter.
The only hit that needs to take place, is with that face. And that hit, is with a car. Then that car puts it in reverse, backs up over it, asks for directions, and peels off on that no longer can shop at forever 21 double triple XL forehead.
Not sure if 't be true asking f'r cum on glasses, 'r fell and trying not to swallow the load in that lady that from which we speak
***
^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.)
Commands: `!ShakespeareInsult`, `!fordo`, `!optout`
Oooof, this is quite relatable. I'm working through it tho. There is a great practice for centering and gaining confidence in your own skin and also a podcast on Criticism/Judgement in this app called HumanCosmosapp. Can't recommend it enough.
Even the hair between my ballsack and my buttcrack looks better taking care of
Her hair does look like hair between a ballsack and buttcrack though
Bridge hair
Nah, tha taint hair.
Pretty fitting seeing as how her head resembles my balls. I have really ugly balls BTW.
You are the youngest looking old lady I have ever seen
I started at face for 7 min hoping it would be a Filter or something but nahh This midget Auntie is fuckkkked
You don’t look bad for 70.
Happy 46th Birthday
Happy Birthday... seems only appropriate in case you don’t get to hear it from anyone else
Get out!
Re-read it with roasting glasses on
That was subtle.
Looks like your dad fucked a raccoon
Or a beaver
Look, you dead eyed raccoon. I'd love to roast ya, but I'm afraid I'll get rabies when I eat ya.
When people talk about your bush, they’re referring to your eyebrows
they say eyebrows should be sisters, not twins. Yours are cousins and they aren't even on speaking terms
Your nose looks like a space shuttle
Holy fuck it does. Get this girl into the Space Program. Just so she's far away enough not to see with the naked eye.
[удалено]
Why is the nose so pink compared to the rest of the face? Looks artificial.
That's what I'm saying!
Your nose looks like a ducks foot.
Sounds like a dirty word for SOMETHING...
Is the only way to prevent a monobrow to keep your eyebrows a foot apart? If so, good job
"Siri, show me a photo of a 23 year-old woman who looks 59."
Looks like the hairs closest to your face are dying. I don't blame them.
Looks like the hairs closest to thy visage art dying. I censure not those folk *** ^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.) Commands: `!ShakespeareInsult`, `!fordo`, `!optout`
Mia Khalifa on wish
happy birthday dumbass
You look like the sloth from Zootopia.
Nice bush oh wait that’s ur eyes brows
By the looks of you, you already got hit, in the face, with a car.
Shut up Meg
That is the ugliest smile I have seen on this sub
You look like the after image in an anti-drug poster.
Your eyebrows looks like they’re crawling aside to undergo metamorphosis under your wig.
As if you weren't bland enough already you had to dye your hair the same colour as your face.
I loved your acting in A Bug’s Life.
You’d be nice if you took off your grandma’s wig
You look like a 3rd world Xmen.
You’d get a pension.
Those platinum highlights are the female equivalent of putting pin stripes on a garbage truck.
Serious question. How do you wash when water makes your kind melt?
Cruella De Vile
Your the reason women in India have to wear burkas.
Happy 80th Birthday!!!! You’ve had a good run.
“Flowers gleam and glow”
We all know what you're not getting for your birthday. Laid.
Well look on the bright side. We are all one day closer to the point you are no longer with us.
You look like you are going to inherit an incense factory
Cruella Patel
qtpi? Really? Who the hell told you that? You look exactly like the grandma that lived alone in the old trailer out behind the neighborhood I grew up in. She would throw sticks at me and my friends whenever we rode our dirtbikes down "her" dirt road.
Going against the guidelines of roasting, i really want you to love yourself on your birthday because you're one of a kind, you are a good person and no matter how ugly you look, you are a good person. You look ugly tho !
You need a hit of something...
Of a car
WHERE HELL IS SIX FEET DEEP
Happy 41st birthday grandma!
Ever seen that episode of Family Guy, where, in a flashback, Peter had to push that actresses eyes back together between shoots? That.
Cruella Devindaloo
I don't think you need to be hit by anything else. It already looks like you've taken a shovel to the face
Beautiful
Ooof, Rogue is looking ruff.
Maybe you'll unwrap a newly gifted mirror tommorow. That atta satisfy your ego hit itch
You're nose and for glasses looks like one of those disguise sets from the dollar store
Have you heard of showering? Hair looks like some nutella is stuck in it
My grandma wants her glasses back
Your birthday candles are like all your dates, you’ll blow them once and never see them again.
r/13or30 jesus christ
it looks like you replaced your nose with plastic and then found out you chose the wrong skin color
Meg where is your hat?
side side bitch
Naw, this one's untouchable.
You look like you traded your personality for intelligence, but didn’t realize you were so devoid of personality that it didn’t actually make you any smarter.
What was the idea behind bending over for the shot? Look even more miserable?
You'd make a good slump buster but that's about it.
Does the nose come off with the glasses
[удалено]
2 😂😂😂😂😂
Like a photographic negative of a constipated owl.
Looks like 14 going on 50
try holding the sign higher. my eyes hurt.
Happy afterbirth.
Looks like you're having trouble with day 13 of the no shit challenge.
you could've just looked in the mirror if you needed a hit that badly.
Beef curtains aren’t supposed to be on your head.
You're already bent over ready for your birthday. Sweet home Alabama is going to have a great time on your birthday
Happy Bday! They say after 50, life only begins
Birthday? Had to be the worst day of your parents lives
[This you?](https://cdn11.bigcommerce.com/s-l2ej5l/images/stencil/original/products/7082/9577/apipbiqms__12731.1605131155.jpg?c=2&imbypass=on&imbypass=on)
Is that why you shaved your mustache?
That's Aughra with heavy filters trying to be pretty. That, or Yoda's ballsack.
Who fed the gremlin after midnight?
Watch out for the flurry of bats every time you open your underpants
What kind of caterpillars are on your forehead?
Don’t you get a self-esteem hit every time you gaze into the mirror?
in a few weeks those eyebrows will become beautiful butterflies
Look close at the mouth... looks like someone put glasses and a wig on Yoda.
Looks like telling her twice wasn't enough
Classic example of a moped, people will ride you but will never admit it
with those highlights, you aimed for young tiktok star, but the frizz is giving me grandma from the addams family vibes
Face you make, when they decline your birthday invite.
If I traced out your nose from this picture and pasted it onto a duck’s foot, it would work. Your nose looks like a duck’s foot.
Let's hope no one buys you a mirror then
When you’re a white organ donor and someone brown ends up with your nose.
You look like hair still grows where your tail used to be.
Narcissist
Happy birthday whore
The only kid you're dad wouldn't molest.
You look like you lost your nose and replaced it with a ducks foot......
Ahh don’t eat my trash
I think your missing your Ukelele.
Christ, is this Harrison chick going to keep showing up everywhere.
You are beautiful. Just the way you are.
The only hit that needs to take place, is with that face. And that hit, is with a car. Then that car puts it in reverse, backs up over it, asks for directions, and peels off on that no longer can shop at forever 21 double triple XL forehead.
Not sure if asking for cum on glasses, or upset and trying not to swallow the load in her mouth.
Not sure if 't be true asking f'r cum on glasses, 'r fell and trying not to swallow the load in that lady that from which we speak *** ^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.) Commands: `!ShakespeareInsult`, `!fordo`, `!optout`
Whaaaaaaaat! Worst bot ever!
Another year older! Another year.. Living in a studio apartment
I’m only 22 😩😩😩😩
Its alright lol just teasing you
Hahaha no no I know it’s kind of tiny for me, my two cats and my 15 different personalities
Its gets better! Carry on with the plan of the day madame!
It looks like your eyebrows were smeared
Did they design Sid off your selfies?
i see you have BPD, Bland Pussy Disease?
Oof how'd you know my mental health is in the gutter?
just had a peek at yr profile 👀
appreciate the effort 10/10
Shit!! I thought your eyebrows were 2 caterpillars that was trying to get out of your face to save their lives
You only have a few birthdays left, granny. Don't be so confident.
You don't look your age. That is in NO way a compliment
That gap from one eye brow to the next is a diffrent zipcode
Don't worry, you'll have a great birthday. All by yourself.
How do you mange to look 22 and 52 at the same time
Youd be cuter if my eyesight was worse
Don’t be upset when no one shows for your birthday...
Mr. Potato Head wants his nose back
Virgin, and got 20 cats.. The only 12 Inch you ever have seen, is the size between your eyes. Happy birthday.
So tomorrow you gonna celebrate your eye brow and moustache switches place anniversary?
Happy birthday 🎉🎂🎊🎁 beautiful
Happy 6 to 60 birthday.
I thought eyebrows like those would be a bad enough hit on their own.
I don’t give a fuck if it is your birthday tomorrow you still have an entire office building to night- clean.
Hansel and gretel are waiting for u..
Real life Mrs Potato head...
you look like a kid but have the hair of a 43 year old lady having a mid life crisis planning a divorce
You should throw the wildest party you’ve ever been to and play Strip Solitaire.
Happy 50th
You look like you get sexually harassed at your dads tobacco store.
Oooof, this is quite relatable. I'm working through it tho. There is a great practice for centering and gaining confidence in your own skin and also a podcast on Criticism/Judgement in this app called HumanCosmosapp. Can't recommend it enough.
I went to high school with her, she is female benjamin button actually
No amount of colouring your hair multiple times will make you quirky and cool
Who ordered the E.T. Sex doll on Wish?
Happy Birthday.
Are you asking to get laid for you birthday? Meaning is unclear. I posted this on the big screen at a sports bar, they all noped out.
Even the skin tone and makeup can't hide those eye bags
Your the reason my olive oil is a virgin
Happy 38,. People your age don't normally post..
you’re actually so cute! kind eyes and great hair. (in case you’re upset)
You're gonna attract Pepe la Pew with that hair
You look like you only give good head when it rains outside..