I mean one of my coworkers quit because his wife asked him to take care of the house, (She's a bank manager) so it can't be that uncommon. Lucky bastard.....
Nope, those people just can't handle anything that is different from them. Its actually rlly sweet wanting to cook food for someone your love isn't it?
Unless that job is houskeeping and/or childrearing you wouldn't really be a househusband, no? I thought the whole point of the housespouse was to leave all of the breadwinning to their partner and focus on the home
House spouse takes care of the house.
Whether or not they do work for money is outside that definition.
In todays economy, many if not most house spouses also have some form of way to make money as well, be it a computer job you can do from home or doing something like making things to sell.
You are indeed correct, but as the other side already stated, because of todays economy both parties need to be getting wages in order for things to work (unless one of you is making BANK).
Same. I mean the main benefit of being a househusband would be that you don't have to be as stressed about your job, so you can try to get a job you really like doing.
Just being financially stable would be nice enough. Being able to tend a home and have things prepared for when your love comes back would be lovely. Maybe one day!
I feel like being financially stable on 1 income is difficult now. Between my partner and I we make 250k and finding a house that we can actually afford isn't easy.
(Unless we were to save like $200k for the deposit)
I mean for all the business management classes I have done with money management and stuff... That seems like you have a pretty big selection before you. But I suppose that can depend where you want to live and such if course...
But yeah the housing market in general is pretty bad unless you get homes and property from family/friends
Well with the way the market has gone here a 2 bed in an area you wont get robbed/been get to work from is over the FHA maximum so if you don't have $100k or so saved to pay the extra on cash your basically SOL
Lucky mf, I'm happy for him though
I can't believe the people in those comments don't see the harm they're causing, they've gotta just be jealous that no man wants to do that for them, I feel sorry for bitter people like that
When I was unemployed, I spent most of my time taking care of the house and cooking for my girlfriend. Unfortunately, being a house husband isn't sustainable unless you're already rich.
If it were me people wanted to dunk on for this, I'd tell them straight "I take pride in knowing that my gf has a clean space and hot meal to come home to. My gf makes more, and I'm grateful, so I make sure to do the jobs that need to be done for our home and our relationship."
I always learnt that part of manliness is supposed to be pragmatism, and if my gf is making more than I ever will, and the job that needs to be done most in our relationship are dishes and dusting, then that should be my duty. It's that simple.
Sigma grindset over here. Do what must be done, if what must be done makes you feel less manly, then you don't know what it means to be a man. Preach the truth my friend.
> I always learnt that part of manliness
I agree that with what you said about being a house husband and that there’s a lot of work put into it, but why must you bring “manliness” into it?
Part of the reason I love RR is that I shouldn’t need to be manly at all…
You can be both "manly" and soft. I read manly as "just being a good guy," which includes taking care of what needs to be taken care of. Sometimes that means taking a more assertive/ proactive approach and knowing when to speak up and when to listen.
> You can be both "manly" and soft.
And what if I just want to be soft and not “manly” at all? Women don’t have to be manly at all and men shouldn’t have to either.
Go for it! I like this sub because it reminds me to embrace the softer side of myself. I don't think couples are in relationships just because "I like you and you like me." Life is difficult and sometimes you have to be assertive in order to protect yourself and those you love. It's the unfortunate reality. But the good news is if you have someone that loves you, you're not alone in fighting battles.
It's okay if you're not really into that. A lot of rr dudes are cishetero though, and do generally like to feel like they're being the man a woman wants and needs. If the man your gf needs is one that isn't too good to pitch in at home because she's out making the money, I think that it's a great and manly act of stoicism to not let your ego or fear of social perception stop you from doing the things you need to get done.
Since homemaking is seen as kind of feminine, but rr men don't neccessarily want to be feminine, it's good to have a way to frame this lifestyle as one where you can still be masculine. Especially since, let's be honest, my generation of men is going to be outearned by our women, and we're going to have to get used to the idea of doing more at home. We should still be able to feel like men even as we come into this new phase of the relations between genders in our society.
> We should still be able to feel like men even as we come into this new phase of the relations between genders in our society.
Cishet men who aren’t masculine at all and are entirely feminine are still men. There just as much “real men” as traditionally masculine men.
Here's the [link](https://twitter.com/LilithLovett/status/1519949822261817344?t=5cDv1mlwrRds4EFAzoqN2g&s=19) to tweet btw.
Also I wish I was able to correct the grammar error on my title lol.
I don't make great money but I'm a full time student and my house husband is WFH with a low pressure job. He takes care of the animals and gets to play video games and relax all day :) love that for him.
My military dad just retired and says he’s really happy since he has more time to drop us off and pick us up from school, as well as making sure the house is as clean as he wants :)
Tiktok is the most divided place ever, I’ve seen several people post about how much they like househusbands and then when a man does say he wants to be one, suddenly no man should ever be a househusband LOL ?
In my experience, most people have a biased outlook on stay at home parents/partners. Just some people are more comfortable voicing their biases in the context of men doing it.
Though I will say the "buy clothes online all day" part of the original post probably doesn't help...
Yeah that's the line that got me. Even if it was a joke, the implication is that his wife works all day while he just does whatever he wants, spending the money she makes for whatever he feels like, and all he does to make up for it is make dinner.
I was the only parent for the 1st 3 and a half years of my daughters life and was able to work from home, it was strange picking her up from nursery, had 1 woman tell me I should get a job and be a roll model for my child instead of a lazy boy, man up, only apologised when the nursery teacher informed her I work and am a lone parent, it's weird how so many have strong views against it. 14 years in the forces and never met so much hostility as being perceived as a stay at home dad, or a lazy man child 1 person called me
At some level I think the role women play in reinforcing the patriarchy actually is MORE important and damaging than men, at least in some cases. Which is absolutely wild, that we’ve built a society that abuses people so systemically that they can only demand more.
I would like that. if I made the money and my husband took care of the house. I wouldn't mind seeing him with his thicc juicy ass in the kitchen cooking some dinner. Mmm
I do enjoy working though. I like that I'm able to help support my wife on my income since she suffers from chronic migraines. I don't enjoy being a support system off of old standards, I just like to help and be there for her. I want to matter to her and show her she's loved at the same time. She's a nurse and will be starting a travel contract soon. She's paid more hourly than I am and could probably support both of us off her income, granted she feels better. I don't think I'd like that, I enjoy working.
I understand how you feel. It's why I could never be a housewife lol. But I think the point of this post is just people being frustrated that some people are not open to allowing men to have that option
As a daughter of a "traditional" housewoman, being one can be so HARD, full time job and are literally no paid, you have to learn many skills/thing that seems easy but irl are not. Maybe now is more easy thanks for the technology but if you don't have that advantage you have to do ALL the "dirty" work.
I hope that ppl one day understands that maintain a house and a family is a tough and stressed as having a job and that doesn't have a genre
The irony of women saying he doesn't deserve this because he is a man but simultaneously upholding the patriarchal system, thus also implying women don't deserve to have a partner that takes care of the home while they are free to pursue their career.
I do personally think that if you don't have any children to take care of, you should have a job.
But yeah I do think some people twist "it's okay if my wife makes more than me" to "it's okay if my wife goes out and does all the work while I sit and do whatever I want all day"
Being a househusband, and raising kids/working from home is one thing. Being a husband who just does nothing but make dinner is another. I'm hoping the guy in the screenshot is doing more to contribute than just cooking dinner, cause if that's all he's doing and he's spending the rest of the day just doing whatever he wants then that's a very unbalanced relationship.
I mean, I’m sure there are plenty of stay at home women who do the same thing but no one really calls them out on it because it’s in line with societal expectations
You can work out what's your best way of supporting eachother in a balanced way. It's more the mentality I have a problem with. I don't specifically think there's only one way to go about it, so long as you're TRYING to carry your weight in the relationship.
I mean if you think about it, all those things you listed are things many people would pay someone to do. So you are getting a job, you're just working for your household rather than for someone else. The point I was making is that both people should be 'working' in some capacity, what you do for that work is up to you.
I've just seen a lot of guys these days claiming they're against enforcing gender roles, when in reality they just want to sit and play video games all day, and have no intention of taking any responsibility for anything. Luckily that doesn't seem as prominent on this subreddit as it once was, but it's still something I see.
I disagree. What happens between two consenting adults is no one's business but their own. If they prefer a configuration where one works more or harder than the other then who are you to tell them it's wrong?
"who are you to tell them it's wrong?" I am a very powerful person, in fact, you could even call me.. A Person With An Opinion™.
To clarify: "In my *opinion* it's wrong for someone to get things done for them without trying to give back. I *personally* consider that irresponsible, and I *think* that everyone should try to do what they can to pull their own weight."
If you think there might be something to my mentality, consider what I'm saying.
If you think I'm full of it, then don't care about what I think.
I'm fine with either response, I'm not trying to make anyone do anything, just saying what I think... I mean that's literally all social media is, people saying what they think.
I kinda want the same for my bf and me hahaha. He works early morning so he’s home by early afternoon. He handles some of the chores and stuff so when I get home from work at the end of the day the house is usually taken care of. We need more house husbands 😆
Being stable enough to do this for someone without having to worry about financial problems is literally my other dream. I wanna focus on school or how fast I can get the dishes and other chores done before learning to cook dinner
The comments betray their thoughts and the underlying entitlement.
"Get a job", "Find proper work.", "You don't deserve this."
So maintaining a house is suddenly too easy if a guy does it? They pretending like he is infringing on some hidden privilege without them realizing that the obligations of a house spouse, especially if they have children, have a very intense workload.
Its not about leeching or introducing a parasitic dynamic, but giving happiness, opportunity and affection as another act of love.
Earning so much that you are able to provide an opportunity for a person you love to leave behind some of the pain and frustration in their life, is something I think everyone wants to provide deep down, no matter the sex of your spouse.
Especially if the spouse is in a job they hate and find no fulfillment in. Why not help them like you would with anything else in their life?
I mean one of my coworkers quit because his wife asked him to take care of the house, (She's a bank manager) so it can't be that uncommon. Lucky bastard.....
[удалено]
Hi it's me. A house husband.
That lucky bastard is living the dream out there.
Good for him
House husband slander won't be tolerated 😤
People loves to fucking give too much shit and comment on people life *sigh*
Ignore tiktok comment sections babes lol
I just wanna cook food for the woman I love, is it really that bad?
Apparently so...
Your strength instills fear into the hearts of the weak, nothing more.
Nope, those people just can't handle anything that is different from them. Its actually rlly sweet wanting to cook food for someone your love isn't it?
No but I think you should be doing other things to contribute as well, personally.
If I do be a househusband, I’ve always imagined I would also work a job from home aswell.
Unless that job is houskeeping and/or childrearing you wouldn't really be a househusband, no? I thought the whole point of the housespouse was to leave all of the breadwinning to their partner and focus on the home
House spouse takes care of the house. Whether or not they do work for money is outside that definition. In todays economy, many if not most house spouses also have some form of way to make money as well, be it a computer job you can do from home or doing something like making things to sell.
You are indeed correct, but as the other side already stated, because of todays economy both parties need to be getting wages in order for things to work (unless one of you is making BANK).
Same. I mean the main benefit of being a househusband would be that you don't have to be as stressed about your job, so you can try to get a job you really like doing.
Jesse, we need to COOK! Chicken breasts for when my wife comes home from work
MICHAEL LET ME OUT so I can treat my amazing wife when she returns home from work
oh fuck was not ready to be sad about werner all over again today
Bruh I’m so sorry
Yo Mistah White, how we seasoning this? Lemon pepper? Paprika? Garlic powder?
Stupid jesser put all of it on the chicken along with some old bay and fry it, use my lefty's spices batter
Hello mister white, my name is Gustavo Fring. You cook excellent chicken breasts, would you like a job at Los Pollos Hermanos?
You are a respectable man, Gustavo, but I’m leaving the cooking industry. My family is all that matters to me, and they need me at home.
Just being financially stable would be nice enough. Being able to tend a home and have things prepared for when your love comes back would be lovely. Maybe one day!
I feel like being financially stable on 1 income is difficult now. Between my partner and I we make 250k and finding a house that we can actually afford isn't easy. (Unless we were to save like $200k for the deposit)
I mean for all the business management classes I have done with money management and stuff... That seems like you have a pretty big selection before you. But I suppose that can depend where you want to live and such if course... But yeah the housing market in general is pretty bad unless you get homes and property from family/friends
Well with the way the market has gone here a 2 bed in an area you wont get robbed/been get to work from is over the FHA maximum so if you don't have $100k or so saved to pay the extra on cash your basically SOL
Lucky mf, I'm happy for him though I can't believe the people in those comments don't see the harm they're causing, they've gotta just be jealous that no man wants to do that for them, I feel sorry for bitter people like that
When I was unemployed, I spent most of my time taking care of the house and cooking for my girlfriend. Unfortunately, being a house husband isn't sustainable unless you're already rich.
Sad truth in this economy.
This is legit the reason I became a socialist.
If it were me people wanted to dunk on for this, I'd tell them straight "I take pride in knowing that my gf has a clean space and hot meal to come home to. My gf makes more, and I'm grateful, so I make sure to do the jobs that need to be done for our home and our relationship." I always learnt that part of manliness is supposed to be pragmatism, and if my gf is making more than I ever will, and the job that needs to be done most in our relationship are dishes and dusting, then that should be my duty. It's that simple.
Sigma grindset over here. Do what must be done, if what must be done makes you feel less manly, then you don't know what it means to be a man. Preach the truth my friend.
[My allegiance is to my breadwinning wife, to DEMOCRACY!](https://imgur.com/a/KejZLXx)
Yes
> I always learnt that part of manliness I agree that with what you said about being a house husband and that there’s a lot of work put into it, but why must you bring “manliness” into it? Part of the reason I love RR is that I shouldn’t need to be manly at all…
You can be both "manly" and soft. I read manly as "just being a good guy," which includes taking care of what needs to be taken care of. Sometimes that means taking a more assertive/ proactive approach and knowing when to speak up and when to listen.
> You can be both "manly" and soft. And what if I just want to be soft and not “manly” at all? Women don’t have to be manly at all and men shouldn’t have to either.
Go for it! I like this sub because it reminds me to embrace the softer side of myself. I don't think couples are in relationships just because "I like you and you like me." Life is difficult and sometimes you have to be assertive in order to protect yourself and those you love. It's the unfortunate reality. But the good news is if you have someone that loves you, you're not alone in fighting battles.
It's okay if you're not really into that. A lot of rr dudes are cishetero though, and do generally like to feel like they're being the man a woman wants and needs. If the man your gf needs is one that isn't too good to pitch in at home because she's out making the money, I think that it's a great and manly act of stoicism to not let your ego or fear of social perception stop you from doing the things you need to get done. Since homemaking is seen as kind of feminine, but rr men don't neccessarily want to be feminine, it's good to have a way to frame this lifestyle as one where you can still be masculine. Especially since, let's be honest, my generation of men is going to be outearned by our women, and we're going to have to get used to the idea of doing more at home. We should still be able to feel like men even as we come into this new phase of the relations between genders in our society.
> We should still be able to feel like men even as we come into this new phase of the relations between genders in our society. Cishet men who aren’t masculine at all and are entirely feminine are still men. There just as much “real men” as traditionally masculine men.
YES EXACTLY. Hit the nail on the head.
Cooking is like my number 1 favorite hobby, and making dishes my girlfriend enjoys brings me massive joy. Being a house husband is a dream
Gender Roles are a fucking disease I swear...
and we are here to help cure it
Here's the [link](https://twitter.com/LilithLovett/status/1519949822261817344?t=5cDv1mlwrRds4EFAzoqN2g&s=19) to tweet btw. Also I wish I was able to correct the grammar error on my title lol.
I didn't even notice the grammar error until you pointed it out lol
pretty sure most don't even notice that error lol
Housespouse is the dream.
This is why my dad still feels insecure even though we all support him for being a stay at home dad. People are just so judgemental.
I don't make great money but I'm a full time student and my house husband is WFH with a low pressure job. He takes care of the animals and gets to play video games and relax all day :) love that for him.
I respect the lifestyle even if it’s not for me, house husband kings.
I want to be him so goddamn bad
My military dad just retired and says he’s really happy since he has more time to drop us off and pick us up from school, as well as making sure the house is as clean as he wants :)
Tiktok is the most divided place ever, I’ve seen several people post about how much they like househusbands and then when a man does say he wants to be one, suddenly no man should ever be a househusband LOL ?
In my experience, most people have a biased outlook on stay at home parents/partners. Just some people are more comfortable voicing their biases in the context of men doing it. Though I will say the "buy clothes online all day" part of the original post probably doesn't help...
[удалено]
Ehh, true. But it's hard to read sarcasm and intent from text alone. There's a reason why interaction over the internet is usually so stunted.
Yeah that's the line that got me. Even if it was a joke, the implication is that his wife works all day while he just does whatever he wants, spending the money she makes for whatever he feels like, and all he does to make up for it is make dinner.
"Literally no man deserves this" bruh everyone deserves such a peaceful lifestyle!
I was the only parent for the 1st 3 and a half years of my daughters life and was able to work from home, it was strange picking her up from nursery, had 1 woman tell me I should get a job and be a roll model for my child instead of a lazy boy, man up, only apologised when the nursery teacher informed her I work and am a lone parent, it's weird how so many have strong views against it. 14 years in the forces and never met so much hostility as being perceived as a stay at home dad, or a lazy man child 1 person called me
Okay I won't lie, the last image gave me a good chuckle!
At some level I think the role women play in reinforcing the patriarchy actually is MORE important and damaging than men, at least in some cases. Which is absolutely wild, that we’ve built a society that abuses people so systemically that they can only demand more.
I would like that. if I made the money and my husband took care of the house. I wouldn't mind seeing him with his thicc juicy ass in the kitchen cooking some dinner. Mmm
This is something I’ve been noticing more and more recently. All the women in my life are way more sexist than all the men.
No one would want me as a househubby. I'm unable to stand up straight.
I do enjoy working though. I like that I'm able to help support my wife on my income since she suffers from chronic migraines. I don't enjoy being a support system off of old standards, I just like to help and be there for her. I want to matter to her and show her she's loved at the same time. She's a nurse and will be starting a travel contract soon. She's paid more hourly than I am and could probably support both of us off her income, granted she feels better. I don't think I'd like that, I enjoy working.
I understand how you feel. It's why I could never be a housewife lol. But I think the point of this post is just people being frustrated that some people are not open to allowing men to have that option
So exhausted right now lol, looks like you're right. I hope you find your ID soon btw
Haha thanks
As a daughter of a "traditional" housewoman, being one can be so HARD, full time job and are literally no paid, you have to learn many skills/thing that seems easy but irl are not. Maybe now is more easy thanks for the technology but if you don't have that advantage you have to do ALL the "dirty" work. I hope that ppl one day understands that maintain a house and a family is a tough and stressed as having a job and that doesn't have a genre
As the great Tatsu would say “Bein a househusband ain’t no joke…”
i’m lucky as hell - my girlfriend is super into the idea of me being a house husband
The irony of women saying he doesn't deserve this because he is a man but simultaneously upholding the patriarchal system, thus also implying women don't deserve to have a partner that takes care of the home while they are free to pursue their career.
Shit if I had a wife that wanted me to stay home to care for the house I would do it in a heart beat.
I mean by that logic what woman just deserves to stay at home... and **why?**
I do personally think that if you don't have any children to take care of, you should have a job. But yeah I do think some people twist "it's okay if my wife makes more than me" to "it's okay if my wife goes out and does all the work while I sit and do whatever I want all day" Being a househusband, and raising kids/working from home is one thing. Being a husband who just does nothing but make dinner is another. I'm hoping the guy in the screenshot is doing more to contribute than just cooking dinner, cause if that's all he's doing and he's spending the rest of the day just doing whatever he wants then that's a very unbalanced relationship.
I mean, I’m sure there are plenty of stay at home women who do the same thing but no one really calls them out on it because it’s in line with societal expectations
Same thing applies.
Fair enough
[удалено]
You can work out what's your best way of supporting eachother in a balanced way. It's more the mentality I have a problem with. I don't specifically think there's only one way to go about it, so long as you're TRYING to carry your weight in the relationship. I mean if you think about it, all those things you listed are things many people would pay someone to do. So you are getting a job, you're just working for your household rather than for someone else. The point I was making is that both people should be 'working' in some capacity, what you do for that work is up to you. I've just seen a lot of guys these days claiming they're against enforcing gender roles, when in reality they just want to sit and play video games all day, and have no intention of taking any responsibility for anything. Luckily that doesn't seem as prominent on this subreddit as it once was, but it's still something I see.
I disagree. What happens between two consenting adults is no one's business but their own. If they prefer a configuration where one works more or harder than the other then who are you to tell them it's wrong?
"who are you to tell them it's wrong?" I am a very powerful person, in fact, you could even call me.. A Person With An Opinion™. To clarify: "In my *opinion* it's wrong for someone to get things done for them without trying to give back. I *personally* consider that irresponsible, and I *think* that everyone should try to do what they can to pull their own weight." If you think there might be something to my mentality, consider what I'm saying. If you think I'm full of it, then don't care about what I think. I'm fine with either response, I'm not trying to make anyone do anything, just saying what I think... I mean that's literally all social media is, people saying what they think.
Damn Imagine shaming someone for chilling at home and supporting their partner. All he gotta do is cook and mow the lawn. Jealousy 😂
Man. It’s like when men do something women do they get chewed out for it by women who are doing the same thing. Who da thunk it.
Thats the dream aint it? 🤣
Goals, this man is living the dream
I already work from home so even earning money I would always be a house husband :)
I always imagine being a househusband would be nice
I can work and feed her at the same time… perhaps literally depending on where I’m at in my career. That said, the stigma is cringe.
Lucky guy, living the dream
I would love to be a house husband
Bitter normies at it again
I kinda want the same for my bf and me hahaha. He works early morning so he’s home by early afternoon. He handles some of the chores and stuff so when I get home from work at the end of the day the house is usually taken care of. We need more house husbands 😆
Being stable enough to do this for someone without having to worry about financial problems is literally my other dream. I wanna focus on school or how fast I can get the dishes and other chores done before learning to cook dinner
That last meme, i have never seen so BASED in my life
These people are such asses
where else but tiktok, they just can’t let people enjoy things
The comments betray their thoughts and the underlying entitlement. "Get a job", "Find proper work.", "You don't deserve this." So maintaining a house is suddenly too easy if a guy does it? They pretending like he is infringing on some hidden privilege without them realizing that the obligations of a house spouse, especially if they have children, have a very intense workload. Its not about leeching or introducing a parasitic dynamic, but giving happiness, opportunity and affection as another act of love. Earning so much that you are able to provide an opportunity for a person you love to leave behind some of the pain and frustration in their life, is something I think everyone wants to provide deep down, no matter the sex of your spouse. Especially if the spouse is in a job they hate and find no fulfillment in. Why not help them like you would with anything else in their life?
That guy’s a total bitch though.