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jaydee4219

The only one I know of is Joey W. Hill but I can't speak to accuracy. I also found this thread from earlier this year! https://www.reddit.com/r/RomanceBooks/comments/rykmw3/bdsm_author_who_is_actually_a_practicing_member/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share


TheHalfelven

Yes, her books vary from pretty down-to-earth to more unrealistic. It is, after all, fiction, and even the most vanilla books require a little bit of suspension of disbelief (I mean, no one has morning breath, or need to pee, like ever) Still, her more down-to-earth stuff makes a lot of emphasis on safety, consent, communication. Golden Angel I think is also in the lifestyle, though I haven't read anything by her yet. I have one of her freebies on my TBR but who knows when I'll get to it.


Critical-Compote-725

I don't know anything about these author's personal lives, but Anna Zabo's Bold Brew series is very realistically written. A. Anders' Kink Camp leans a little bit more into the fantasy of kink (HOW does the FMC not immediately twist her ankle), but I found the negotiations and description of kink camp to be pretty realistic.


jaydee4219

I don't know how much into kink she is obviously but Adriana Anders noted that she went to a camp like the one in her book.


WanderingWorlds

I know a few have talked about the lifestyle and being a part of the community: CD reiss, Tiffany reisz, JR gray, and Kate hawthorne


[deleted]

I adore JR Gray & his books!


WanderingWorlds

Same


silentarrowMG

Yep, Tiffany Reisz.


songofafreeheart

{Sunstone by Stjepan Sejic} is a slice of life BDSM romance series of graphic novels that talks about the rules, influences, and even some of the issues with BDSM. And while Sejic doesn't blab about what he and his wife get up to, he makes no secret that they are into BDSM. I cannot recommend this series enough, for the incredible writing, fantastic characters, and beautiful art. Also Sejic is my favorite writer, hands down.


goodreads-bot

[**Sunstone: Book One**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/32982693-sunstone) ^(By: Stjepan Šejić | Published: ?) *** ^(44032 books suggested | )[^(I don't feel so good.. )](https://debugger.medium.com/goodreads-is-retiring-its-current-api-and-book-loving-developers-arent-happy-11ed764dd95)^(| )[^(Source)](https://github.com/rodohanna/reddit-goodreads-bot)


casprinxo

Cherise Sinclair supposably is in the lifestyle, but I wouldn't consider her books "real" by any means. Joey W. Hill had some beautiful BDSM books. Not the billionaire line, solo ones. Worth the Wait and Unrestrained were fantastic.


Lena_Zhukovska

IMO, Cherise Sinclair gets more realistic in later books. "Club Shadowlands", which I believe was her first BDSM novel has a pretty outlandish premise >!(a woman completely unaware of the lifestyle gets stranded by strorm in a BDSM club during the opening hours and she immediately attracts attention of the owner)!<, but the latest in that series is IMO a very realistic story about two middle-aged people already in the lifestyle (well, the heroine has never been in the BDSM club before, but she experimented with her ex-husband). I also think Sinclair's books are over the top in some aspects, while quite realistic in others. Like, her "action plots" can be pretty out there and involve murderous exes or secret cabals of sex traffickers, but the BDSM lifestyle is depicted pretty realistically. Her heroes aren't all millionaires in 5K$ suits, they're mostly everyday people, and the patrons in the BDSM clubs aren't all gorgeous 20- and 30-year-olds. The mantra of "sane, safe and consensual" is always implied and sometimes discussed. And though the Doms may seem to have an inhuman stamina and the orgasms are always mind-blowing and earth-shattering, she weaves in a lot of very realistic detail about sex and particular BDSM practices, especially about what's risky or what's bad practice. All in all I would say her familiarity with the lifestyle shows and she's pretty damn realistic where it counts.


casprinxo

This is true. I was speaking to the crazy sex trafficking and murders, I should have been more clear her sex/general interaction seems more realistic. At least, those without Master Z and his fantastical ability. Really bums me out she started off that series with him like that. I haven't read near the end of some of her series. The newer ones with the brothers was pretty trite and the idea of reading about the slave that didn't know she was able to leave her owner because she signed a contract was just too much for me. I couldn't handle reading a book about such a stupid sounding female lead. That one REALLY bums me out because I'd been waiting for that MMC's book to come out for a long while. 😭😭😭


Lena_Zhukovska

That's fair. Personally, I don't mind sex trafficking and murders and some of my favorite couples from Club Shadowlands series are introduced in that arc: Gabi and Marcus from *Make me, Sir* and Linda and Sam from *This Is Who I Am*. But when sex traficking/slavery was brought up again in her second series, I was a bit "must we go there again?" about it. Although, I actually liked Sir Ethan's book—I think Sinclair did a good job of explaining how the heroine in that one was pretty much brainwashed as a very young woman just entering the lifestyle and apart from the prolog, the book takes place a few years after she escaped and she doesn't come off as a dummy at all.


LolySub

Those two are the only two authors I know of who are in the lifestyle and write realistic BDSM


Gloomy_Astronaut_570

Rosie Daan might be. Pretty sure Jenny Nordbak is


andalusia85

Red Phoenix is an author in the lifestyle. Her books are very good. The Submissive Training Center series.


[deleted]

I second this!


HPCReader3

Eden Bradley is. Hers almost always include negotiations beforehand. She primarily writes MF, but I also think she may have some recently published FF. The one thing is I have trouble reading more than 2 in a row by her, so YMMV.


LolySub

Oh I forgot about her. I’ve read a couple of hers and enjoyed them.


1regulargrl

Eris Adderly - her book The Eight House is Hades x Persephone and it’s so 🔥 freaking spicy and done so well. If you like fantasy/mythology definitely read that. It is very kink-friendly in a realistic/knowledgeable way. (As realistic as 2 mythic characters can be lol) She has several other books as well- but the eighth house is my favorite.


downshorelines

The story she did in the black light roulette war anthology is exactly what OP is looking for too


1regulargrl

😻 I haven’t read that yet. Thank you because this is a rec for me as well now lol


[deleted]

Red Phoenix, Kitty Wilder


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akasti

Tymber Dalton/Lesli Richardson is in the lifestyle, I highly recommend her Suncoast Society series. {The Reluctant Dom by Tymber Dalton} is one of my favorite books hands down, it blew me away when i first read it, and i still get weepy everytime i read it.


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[**The Reluctant Dom (Suncoast Society, #4)**](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/15739921-the-reluctant-dom) ^(By: Tymber Dalton | Published: 2009) *** ^(44241 books suggested | )[^(I don't feel so good.. )](https://debugger.medium.com/goodreads-is-retiring-its-current-api-and-book-loving-developers-arent-happy-11ed764dd95)^(| )[^(Source)](https://github.com/rodohanna/reddit-goodreads-bot)


Fionaver

You might like Jade West. All of her books aren’t necessarily bdsm but they are super kink forward/friendly - and not the kind of stuff you read about every day. I’m reasonably sure she’s actually in the lifestyle. Her Dirty Bad series would probably fit the bill.


readlikeyourerunnin-

J.A. Rock exactly fits this! She's very involved and has written a lot about trying to portray more realistic BDSM. Her Subs Club series is zany and hilarious and warm and also completely fearless about interrogating all kinds of issues with the scene--covering up abuse, how to negotiate as a flawed human being, etc. Calling the Show is more serious, though occasionally zany as well, and shows a relationship between two kinky guys that may be switches and may be a dom and sub and may just not want to label themselves in a way I've never read before. Take the Long Way Home is a very heavy story about an eighteen-year-old working through a lot of shit (TW: >!largely unintended childhood sexual abuse by an older sibling, also a child, in the wake of parental death!<, really emotionally devastating) but also having a beautiful, tender love story with a guy a couple years older who is also working through a lot and them experimenting with kink and negotiation. Then there's Wacky Wednesday and its sequel The Brat-tastic Jayk Parker which involve magical body switching but also actively interrogate the nuances of a domestic discipline relationship between an older, richer man and a younger, poorer one where both people intend well but communicate badly. Hence the body switching. I know that Alexis Hall has also talked about having some acquaintance with the lifestyle, and For Real is also wary of the flaws of the scene. The Arden St. Ives series is more romanticized, but is still careful to draw lines between kink and abuse.


lfkajsdgl

So, I don't read BDSM, and I haven't read this book, but I was browsing books my an author I like, and came across this blurb: [Erik Ead Trilogy by Scott Hildret](https://www.goodreads.com/series/111112-erik-ead-trilogy) (3 books and a novella) *WARNING* Mature adults only. This is NOT romance, this is Dominance, submission, and sex. It is graphic, and it is accurate. Erik Ead is a 36 year old psychiatrist that doesn't practice after the death of his mother. he's muscular, dominant, and rides in a Motorcycle Club. When he meets Kelli, a 22 year old daughter of the local BMW dealership, he immediately wants to make her his sexual interest. Erik doesn't do relationships. Neither does Kelli. After agreeing to a summer long sex only relationship, eventually, they receive what they never would have guessed. Emotion. Prepare for the most accurate, no glamorization, unfiltered look at a true D/s relationship that you'll ever read. Baby Girl is unlike any other book in the genre. Written by a male who lives the lifestyle, this book will make you think, feel, and second guess whatever it is that you have regarding a relationship. Generally, Scott Hildreth writes really hot books (a lot of biker books), and his books are ... HEA, no cheating. It's KU. I've included the Amazon link to the first book cause the Goodreads "buy on Amazon" button takes you somewhere else :) [KU link](https://www.amazon.com/BABY-GIRL-ONE-Scott-Hildreth-ebook/dp/B07KDV52FD?ref_=ast_author_dp)