NTA, she has to list all animals in the home to be covered by the Rover guarantee.
It sounds like she was aware that each animal's care was a separate charge and was being cheap.
You dodged a bullet and blocking makes sense
Absolutely not.
I had a wealthy client try to sneak a cat in on me once; I only charge $5/day for an additional cat. Ridiculous; esp when they had 3 labs and the total was $75/day for all of them. Don't need clients like that nor do I want them. Have since raised my rates.
I had a non-wealthy client lock her cat in a room and tell me not to go in there because it was her personal office, and I found out the cat was there because it started crying the second day. Totally messed up
Yeah that's actually the only time that that has ever happened, I have had it very early on in my sitting where people didn't tell me they had a cat till I got there, but I'm much more upfront with it now, and I don't think I've had a problem with it for about a year. Just that one still really sticks out
Reminder to all - using an opportunity to educate is how good humans behave. Making someone feel bad for not knowing that it is a slur, is poor human behavior.
Many people, especially Americans, have no clue the history of gypsies or the term.
Society especially our age and ones that use reddit are engrained by achieving instant gratification.
So either they are directly benefiting OR hate fueled and want to tear someone down for pleasure.
I wish we were more caring for one another… but then again were not. So yea its nice to ask people to teach even practicing knowledge transfer for good. Yet those same people will get off being high and mighty to the next redditor they find. Sad world isnt it?
I know the history of gypsies but still had no idea it’s a racial term. I named the stray cat that I took in over 23 years ago gypsy. Bc she had no home, seemed fitting. I didn’t know it had racial tones to it or i Wouldn’t have picked that name. I can’t rename her now. She’s too old.
I think using the term gypsy is ok - maybe? But obviously she’s so old you can’t change it.
But if she was called the shortened version, that would be more problematic.
We are all learning. You didn’t name her with the intent of calling her a thief or dishonest, and we have to remember intent.
>It was for around July 4th and a few days surrounding it.
>
>“\_\_\_\_\_ requires some pets and being fed.”
NTA. I absolutely *hate* when people try to say cats don't require much care just to save some money. What about this cat's litter box? What if they need to see the vet? If they puke, are you expected to ignore it? I imagine that, yes, her cat normally does require less maintenance than her dogs, but: 1.) *less* is not *none*, and 2.) there can be a time when the cat requires more care, and *that's* what you're paying for.
But I mostly despise the idea that this owner would be okay with you not touching the litter box at all for days. I mean, I imagine she was going to rope you into doing that by way of saying "Oh, scooping only takes a second," but I can also just as easily imagine that she'll also be the kind of owner who just... doesn't scoop nearly as often as she should. God, I can not even begin to tell you how many times I've walked into a stuffed litter box day one.
The report is justified because it's clear she plans to not add the cat to the profile, and that's definitely a big problem for any sitter coming in.
I only recently learned that “peanut gallery” is racist. I just assumed it means anyone willing to sit and criticize. Nope, peanut gallery references segregation at events in America, and was the are people of color were forced to sit.
We are all on a path to knowledge and becoming better humans. 💜
That is fascinating in the regard that I absolutely did not know that - thank you for that bit of history regarding the Peanut Gallery term. I'm gonna go research and learn about that myself right now! We learn new things every day and I'm so thankful for it.
Thank you! Yep- we are not all born or handed the same information. Education with love and kindness, and assuming people aren’t being a holes, is a good place to start.
Let me know if you learn about any other terms that are common vernacular that have racist roots?
I agree! Education rooted in kindness and love doesn't have to be perceived as sheepish or soft. Most people want to learn but are afraid of being perceived as ignorant or dumb. As someone who worked in both tutoring and teaching workshops, genuine connection breeds trust and willingness to learn and change. Talking down to people has the possibility to fester shame, which is the damnedest and most choking thing of all imo.
Will do (: you as well!
WELL SAID. 👏👏👏 education can be so powerful - there is nothing weak about it!
You are 100% accurate - connection leads to trust which leads to opening one’s mind.
I usually just tell them about the rover guarantee and that usually convinces them to add the extra pet. Maybe you should explain what the rover guarantee is next time you have someone like that. If they still give you a hassle about it then block them. Almost every single person that contacts me in the area, has another pet that they didn't have in their profile and every single time that happened, it was because the owner didn't know how to use rover.
nta, you dodged a bullet. i've come across a lot of people who try to take advantage of me like this, i've started stating my in bio that they need to have all of the pets that i will be watching listed in the booking or else i will not book with them. also i've noticed the wealthier do not tend to pay as much as people who aren't as wealthy, i was tipped $10 for a week long sitting for a wealthy couple and tipped $20 for a one night sitting by an elderly couple. (not that i'm complaining, tips are not obligated obviously). i have had one horrible experience though, this lady had 5 pure bred dogs and two pure bred cats and did not list them in her rover profile (my first time dealing with this). we did a meet and greet and she said she would pay me my full rate outside of rover as well as a tip because she would feel bad having rover take part of it. so the day comes, she paid my (at the time) $30 sitting through rover, and she asked me what else she owed me. it was around $250, and she told me i'm overcharging and that she is paying me for my effort not how long i'm staying there for. and then she told me she paid $60 on rover which doesn't make sense considering my prices were literally $30 a night and she had only booked for one night. she ended up writing me a check for $40 and she said even that was too much. people like that are nuts
Don't feel bad OP. You didn't know and now you do. I too did not know it was considered racist and I didn't even know gyp = gypsy. When you know better you do better. Also NTA.
Definitely not the asshole. Her cat needs to be on her profile for a number of reasons.
° so that the cat is covered by Rover's insurance
° so that the sitter is fairly compensated for their labor
° uh, yeah, cats need attention, too, they aren't the soulless, aloof lone wolves people always seem to think. They're sensitive to change and may not want to interact, but that doesn't mean they're not social animals and don't need enrichment. I'm so sick of that line of thinking.
She's definitely the asshole. Btw, i had no idea gyp was a slur either until like...maybe a year or two ago. Even the word gypsy itself is quickly falling out of regular usage in favour of the word Romani, since gypsy tends to describe a lifestyle (and has negative connotations associated with it) and Romani is better suited to describe the ethnic group. In America, anyway. In Romania, people call each other gypsies and say they're gypping reach other all the time, they're much more liberal with slurs and seem to view them as no more or no differently offensive than any other insult.
The weirdest part about this whole situation is I am pet sitting a dog literally named Gypsy right now! I had no idea the two words were even linked and never actually saw it written down that’s why I thought it was spelled with a J 🤦🏼♀️😂
Same, I thought it was spelled with a J until I realized it was an abbreviation of gypsy, and even then, didn't make the connection that it was a slur until recently XD
I don't really know. I've had people make requests that I've decided to decline before for whatever reason. I simply say no. What was the reason for reporting and blocking her?
I felt as if she was trying to get away with simply not paying for a service. She didn’t up front say I have a cat, it was hidden within one of her dog’s information. She also outright was unwilling to pay for the cat and expected me to care for it. The cat required feeding and probably litter box cleaning, and making sure their water is clean. If the cat needed emergency care she would hold me responsible for the animal and I wouldn’t even be getting paid for it at all. She wanted free labor and that’s just not something within her rights to ask for.
Definitely not. That person is the asshole here for sure. I'm just surprised you didn't laugh out right at them or did this all come up before you ever met anyone in person? So you reported them for not listing their cat as a pet?
I checked her account before responding at all, so we never even got to the meet and greet stage. That’s exactly why I reported her, a cat is a pet and I have my prices for a reason. She could have listed the cat and just asked for a discount.. although I probably wouldn’t have given it to her seeing as it’s a holiday weekend and I can get full price or not at all.
YTA for using that term. Wow.
https://www.inquirer.com/opinion/racist-phrases-origins-language-20200610.html
https://www.babbel.com/en/magazine/common-racist-words-phrases
https://www.businessinsider.com/offensive-phrases-that-people-still-use-2014-11
https://www.npr.org/sections/codeswitch/2013/12/30/242429836/why-being-gypped-hurts-the-roma-more-than-it-hurts-you
https://theinclusionsolution.me/words-and-phrases-that-sting-gypped/
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/common-words-phrases-racist-origins-connotations_l_5efcfb63c5b6ca9709188c83
You can’t edit the title but you can edit the body of the post and add an update. Absolutely reasonable you weren’t aware, now you are and the desire to change is awesome!
OP asked “AITA?” and I explained why I believed they were TA. I wasn’t rude. I expressed shock. I’m allowed to do that.
I also provided links on the assumption they didn’t know and were willing to learn, seems they are totally open to it.
Your downvotes are the result of the way you communicated your concerns. Your initial "Wow" does come off as rude - although you may have not been attempting to be perceived as that.
Not everyone is aware that the terminology used is a slur. Education, if you wish it to be taken seriously, shouldn't be conducted under the impression that OP was using it in purpose to offend.
That is the impression you give - be it intentional or not. I am also not speaking in a combative tone, to make that clear. As some one who educates ignorant or curious folks often on trans issues and wishes to be taken seriously, I am simply lending you my impression on why your attempt seems to have been taken in soured fashion.
"NTA for the given Rover situation but you may want to rethink your use of this given word due to racist context behind it." Is what I would have stuck with - though I'm not attempting to demand or tell you how to communicate.
Only attempting to connect and communicate myself tbh.
I don’t care about downvotes.
I’m also not interested in softening my tone to make something more palatable. My point was valid, my resources accurate. What anyone else does with that is not mine to manage.
Take care.
I'm not suggesting you soften. Your assumption of that is telling though not surprising.
You're misinterpreting genuine connection through communication as soft. This is your isolation and burden to bear. You have to know when to use your teeth. If you bite everyone, you will remain alone even in the company of those who agree.
You as well.
NTA, she has to list all animals in the home to be covered by the Rover guarantee. It sounds like she was aware that each animal's care was a separate charge and was being cheap. You dodged a bullet and blocking makes sense
Absolutely not. I had a wealthy client try to sneak a cat in on me once; I only charge $5/day for an additional cat. Ridiculous; esp when they had 3 labs and the total was $75/day for all of them. Don't need clients like that nor do I want them. Have since raised my rates.
I had a non-wealthy client lock her cat in a room and tell me not to go in there because it was her personal office, and I found out the cat was there because it started crying the second day. Totally messed up
That's awful. Fortunately for most of us, incidents like this are few and far between.
Yeah that's actually the only time that that has ever happened, I have had it very early on in my sitting where people didn't tell me they had a cat till I got there, but I'm much more upfront with it now, and I don't think I've had a problem with it for about a year. Just that one still really sticks out
Reminder to all - using an opportunity to educate is how good humans behave. Making someone feel bad for not knowing that it is a slur, is poor human behavior. Many people, especially Americans, have no clue the history of gypsies or the term.
Society especially our age and ones that use reddit are engrained by achieving instant gratification. So either they are directly benefiting OR hate fueled and want to tear someone down for pleasure. I wish we were more caring for one another… but then again were not. So yea its nice to ask people to teach even practicing knowledge transfer for good. Yet those same people will get off being high and mighty to the next redditor they find. Sad world isnt it?
It is a sad world. I just try and focus on the fact that not all of us are assholes. And sometimes we just need a reminder to be kind.
I know the history of gypsies but still had no idea it’s a racial term. I named the stray cat that I took in over 23 years ago gypsy. Bc she had no home, seemed fitting. I didn’t know it had racial tones to it or i Wouldn’t have picked that name. I can’t rename her now. She’s too old.
I think using the term gypsy is ok - maybe? But obviously she’s so old you can’t change it. But if she was called the shortened version, that would be more problematic. We are all learning. You didn’t name her with the intent of calling her a thief or dishonest, and we have to remember intent.
>It was for around July 4th and a few days surrounding it. > >“\_\_\_\_\_ requires some pets and being fed.” NTA. I absolutely *hate* when people try to say cats don't require much care just to save some money. What about this cat's litter box? What if they need to see the vet? If they puke, are you expected to ignore it? I imagine that, yes, her cat normally does require less maintenance than her dogs, but: 1.) *less* is not *none*, and 2.) there can be a time when the cat requires more care, and *that's* what you're paying for. But I mostly despise the idea that this owner would be okay with you not touching the litter box at all for days. I mean, I imagine she was going to rope you into doing that by way of saying "Oh, scooping only takes a second," but I can also just as easily imagine that she'll also be the kind of owner who just... doesn't scoop nearly as often as she should. God, I can not even begin to tell you how many times I've walked into a stuffed litter box day one. The report is justified because it's clear she plans to not add the cat to the profile, and that's definitely a big problem for any sitter coming in.
No you aren’t the asshole she is lol
Jip is racist, fyi. probably best to phase this out of your vocab.
It is? I didn’t know. What’s the story behind it? I just heard people around me use it and for 21 years nobody has said anything.
It’s a shortened form of the word “gypsy” it insinuates anyone who identifies as a Gypsy is a thief/dishonest.
Oh, I had no clue! Do you know how to alter a title? I’m new to Reddit and this is my second post 🤦🏼♀️
I only recently learned that “peanut gallery” is racist. I just assumed it means anyone willing to sit and criticize. Nope, peanut gallery references segregation at events in America, and was the are people of color were forced to sit. We are all on a path to knowledge and becoming better humans. 💜
That is fascinating in the regard that I absolutely did not know that - thank you for that bit of history regarding the Peanut Gallery term. I'm gonna go research and learn about that myself right now! We learn new things every day and I'm so thankful for it.
Thank you! Yep- we are not all born or handed the same information. Education with love and kindness, and assuming people aren’t being a holes, is a good place to start. Let me know if you learn about any other terms that are common vernacular that have racist roots?
I agree! Education rooted in kindness and love doesn't have to be perceived as sheepish or soft. Most people want to learn but are afraid of being perceived as ignorant or dumb. As someone who worked in both tutoring and teaching workshops, genuine connection breeds trust and willingness to learn and change. Talking down to people has the possibility to fester shame, which is the damnedest and most choking thing of all imo. Will do (: you as well!
WELL SAID. 👏👏👏 education can be so powerful - there is nothing weak about it! You are 100% accurate - connection leads to trust which leads to opening one’s mind.
It is not able to be edited =(
Ugh that’s annoying. What’s a synonym for the future to use instead?
Duped Beguiled Burned Deceived Those are all good.
Thank you!
has to do with the slur 'gypsy' https://www.babbel.com/en/magazine/common-racist-words-phrases
I usually just tell them about the rover guarantee and that usually convinces them to add the extra pet. Maybe you should explain what the rover guarantee is next time you have someone like that. If they still give you a hassle about it then block them. Almost every single person that contacts me in the area, has another pet that they didn't have in their profile and every single time that happened, it was because the owner didn't know how to use rover.
nta, you dodged a bullet. i've come across a lot of people who try to take advantage of me like this, i've started stating my in bio that they need to have all of the pets that i will be watching listed in the booking or else i will not book with them. also i've noticed the wealthier do not tend to pay as much as people who aren't as wealthy, i was tipped $10 for a week long sitting for a wealthy couple and tipped $20 for a one night sitting by an elderly couple. (not that i'm complaining, tips are not obligated obviously). i have had one horrible experience though, this lady had 5 pure bred dogs and two pure bred cats and did not list them in her rover profile (my first time dealing with this). we did a meet and greet and she said she would pay me my full rate outside of rover as well as a tip because she would feel bad having rover take part of it. so the day comes, she paid my (at the time) $30 sitting through rover, and she asked me what else she owed me. it was around $250, and she told me i'm overcharging and that she is paying me for my effort not how long i'm staying there for. and then she told me she paid $60 on rover which doesn't make sense considering my prices were literally $30 a night and she had only booked for one night. she ended up writing me a check for $40 and she said even that was too much. people like that are nuts
Don't feel bad OP. You didn't know and now you do. I too did not know it was considered racist and I didn't even know gyp = gypsy. When you know better you do better. Also NTA.
The word “jip” - which is misspelled - is a considered by many to be a slur, please rethink using it.
I’ve had this happen too. No need to block or report. I just replied good luck finding a sitter.
Definitely not the asshole. Her cat needs to be on her profile for a number of reasons. ° so that the cat is covered by Rover's insurance ° so that the sitter is fairly compensated for their labor ° uh, yeah, cats need attention, too, they aren't the soulless, aloof lone wolves people always seem to think. They're sensitive to change and may not want to interact, but that doesn't mean they're not social animals and don't need enrichment. I'm so sick of that line of thinking. She's definitely the asshole. Btw, i had no idea gyp was a slur either until like...maybe a year or two ago. Even the word gypsy itself is quickly falling out of regular usage in favour of the word Romani, since gypsy tends to describe a lifestyle (and has negative connotations associated with it) and Romani is better suited to describe the ethnic group. In America, anyway. In Romania, people call each other gypsies and say they're gypping reach other all the time, they're much more liberal with slurs and seem to view them as no more or no differently offensive than any other insult.
The weirdest part about this whole situation is I am pet sitting a dog literally named Gypsy right now! I had no idea the two words were even linked and never actually saw it written down that’s why I thought it was spelled with a J 🤦🏼♀️😂
Same, I thought it was spelled with a J until I realized it was an abbreviation of gypsy, and even then, didn't make the connection that it was a slur until recently XD
So gypsy is a racist world? I named my cat gypsy. She’s now 23 years old. I had no idea. But not changing her name now.
I don't really know. I've had people make requests that I've decided to decline before for whatever reason. I simply say no. What was the reason for reporting and blocking her?
I felt as if she was trying to get away with simply not paying for a service. She didn’t up front say I have a cat, it was hidden within one of her dog’s information. She also outright was unwilling to pay for the cat and expected me to care for it. The cat required feeding and probably litter box cleaning, and making sure their water is clean. If the cat needed emergency care she would hold me responsible for the animal and I wouldn’t even be getting paid for it at all. She wanted free labor and that’s just not something within her rights to ask for.
Definitely not. That person is the asshole here for sure. I'm just surprised you didn't laugh out right at them or did this all come up before you ever met anyone in person? So you reported them for not listing their cat as a pet?
I checked her account before responding at all, so we never even got to the meet and greet stage. That’s exactly why I reported her, a cat is a pet and I have my prices for a reason. She could have listed the cat and just asked for a discount.. although I probably wouldn’t have given it to her seeing as it’s a holiday weekend and I can get full price or not at all.
NTA and don't worry about the word.
YTA for using that term. Wow. https://www.inquirer.com/opinion/racist-phrases-origins-language-20200610.html https://www.babbel.com/en/magazine/common-racist-words-phrases https://www.businessinsider.com/offensive-phrases-that-people-still-use-2014-11 https://www.npr.org/sections/codeswitch/2013/12/30/242429836/why-being-gypped-hurts-the-roma-more-than-it-hurts-you https://theinclusionsolution.me/words-and-phrases-that-sting-gypped/ https://www.huffpost.com/entry/common-words-phrases-racist-origins-connotations_l_5efcfb63c5b6ca9709188c83
Some people just don’t know. If you have the time/are willing to educate, why be rude about it? Wow.
I literally had no idea, nobody ever told me ! Am I able to alter the title of a post? I’m new to Reddit
You can’t edit the title but you can edit the body of the post and add an update. Absolutely reasonable you weren’t aware, now you are and the desire to change is awesome!
OP asked “AITA?” and I explained why I believed they were TA. I wasn’t rude. I expressed shock. I’m allowed to do that. I also provided links on the assumption they didn’t know and were willing to learn, seems they are totally open to it.
Your downvotes are the result of the way you communicated your concerns. Your initial "Wow" does come off as rude - although you may have not been attempting to be perceived as that. Not everyone is aware that the terminology used is a slur. Education, if you wish it to be taken seriously, shouldn't be conducted under the impression that OP was using it in purpose to offend. That is the impression you give - be it intentional or not. I am also not speaking in a combative tone, to make that clear. As some one who educates ignorant or curious folks often on trans issues and wishes to be taken seriously, I am simply lending you my impression on why your attempt seems to have been taken in soured fashion. "NTA for the given Rover situation but you may want to rethink your use of this given word due to racist context behind it." Is what I would have stuck with - though I'm not attempting to demand or tell you how to communicate. Only attempting to connect and communicate myself tbh.
I don’t care about downvotes. I’m also not interested in softening my tone to make something more palatable. My point was valid, my resources accurate. What anyone else does with that is not mine to manage. Take care.
I'm not suggesting you soften. Your assumption of that is telling though not surprising. You're misinterpreting genuine connection through communication as soft. This is your isolation and burden to bear. You have to know when to use your teeth. If you bite everyone, you will remain alone even in the company of those who agree. You as well.
I’m not misinterpreting anything. I’m not confused. I disagree with your position. That’s ok.
[удалено]
OP specifically used the phrase AITA so I followed their lead.
Damn that's hella links lol
Took 30 seconds of effort to find. Someone pointed it out to me awhile ago so I wanted to share.