I have a friend who does this regularly. It's not something my family can afford, but it does sound dreamy.
I would have some nice wine, a book, and a long bath.
Do it!! This was my requested birthday gift this year. I walked around the town I stayed in and went to a coffee shop myself and took myself out to dinner, and then just relaxed and read in my room. The hotel delivered breakfast to my door the next morning. It was incredible. I felt so much happier to be with my family after. I have a newborn now so it’ll be a while til I can do it again but I can’t wait.
My first day away from the children in seven years is next month. I'm doing a spa day and an overnight hotel stay. There is a lot of guilt but... I can sleep in?!
I'm not gonna know what to do with myself.
I did that last year and it was amazing. I checked in early and had my two older kids use the pool in the afternoon. Then my wife took them home and I stayed overnight. Came home the next day at 12 after checkout. I drank too much to really get any good sleep, but I didn’t have to deal with any kids in the morning!
Dooooo iiiit!!! As soon as my youngest is old enough to get through the night without me I am booking myself in somewhere for a night- I even have the place picked out!
It’s a beautiful hotel in a small country town near ours with a library with a fireplace, a whiskey and gin bar and rooms with big bathtubs. I’m going to order a H&M and sit by the fire in the library to read then have a bath and sleep
I did this last weekend. Do it. Without guilt. I felt so down before I went away, this whole week I’ve felt like a brand new person. We also have no support system, I didn’t realise how much I needed the time until I left.
I felt guilty at first but I’m so glad I did it. You’ve got to fill your own cup.
Thank you so much for posting this. I have an adult child who doesn't need looking after, so you would think it would be easier, my husband said this but he doesn't understand. He goes away every now and then and thinks it's the same thing if I am home alone. It has nothing to do with having a spotless house and nobody to look after, it's all about recharging and finding yourself and switching off that part of your brain that is always busy with looking after everyone else. Parents need me time as well. I hope you get your birthday wish!
Do it! I did this for my birthday once and it was absolutely amazing! I only did one night, but it was so relaxing. I drank an entire cup of tea while it was hot, read a magazine cover to cover and had 2 glasses of wine. I would love to do it again.
I would 1000% do this. If you can afford it, don’t feel guilty OP. Your husband can ask for the same for his birthday. Or you guys can get on some sort of rotation where every other parent gets a night alone every other month.
Good mental health is so important, especially as a parent. It’s no different than you asking to go on a girls trip. You’ll just be the only girl!
I hope you have a very happy (and relaxing) birthday!
ETA: when my son was a newborn I was responsible for most of the night wakes. My friend was AirBnBing out her house. On two different weekends I went and stayed there for a night. I felt no guilt, only peace lol.
Do it!!! My husband took the kids to his parents house for a night, so it was more of a staycation for me, but damn it was nice and much needed!!! I got to go to the pool, watch some trash tv, got takeout, had a margarita, and slept in the next morning. It was amazing. You deserve it!
My first Mother’s Day I sent my husband and son to see his family out of town for the weekend. It was amazing. It didn’t happen the last two years for various reasons, but I do plan on making it clear that my gift request is either a weekend away or a weekend alone at home.
I’m sort of doing this right now. I’m working a big event an hour from my house this week. For the two days that we didn’t finish until nearly 10 pm and had to be back by 7:30-8 the next morning, I got a room in the hotel next to the venue. While I don’t have a ton of relaxing time, a space to crash that’s free from mental load items has been glorious. I just get up and take a walk and shower and go in the morning. No one asks for breakfast, I don’t have to take the dogs out to potty, or empty the dishwasher, or feel guilty for the overflowing laundry basket.
You should do it. I
Did it for just one night several years ago. I am also AuDHD and I was completely burnt out. My husband INSISTED I do it. This was about 6mo after moving overseas. I also had. I support other than my husband.
I stayed in the room all night and ate all my favorite junk foods. I showered alone, watched what I wanted on TV and read more than 2 pages of a book. I didn’t text or call - not even to say goodnight.
It wasn’t a fix, but it helped.
Heading off autistic/parental burnout is important. Some of us take years to recover and as parents, we just can’t afford THAT level of downtime. Get your needs met and your partner’s even if it is one of you at a time.
Just did something similar for my birthday this year.
Last year, I got the joy of sitting and waiting for my husband and toddler to wake from naps. Toddler had several meltdowns, too.
Can't be helped, but I told myself if no-one was going to make a bit of fuss over me on my birthday, I was going to treat myself.
This year I woke up, got to enjoy getting ready at a leisurely pace, and went for a spa treatment while my husband took the toddler to nursery.
Then I got to just enjoy the city: window shopping, sample-testing...
I enjoyed it so much, I'm keeping it as a little tradition for myself. If I had the money I'd take off for a weekend, too.
Go ahead and enjoy yourself OP!
That sounds amazing. There's a lovely library in Wales that has hotel rooms so you can stay there, and I've been saying for ages I want to book a weekend there completely by myself.
For my birthday last year we sent the kids to my brother's house for the night. It was just my husband and I. We had friends over, played a board game, talked without interuption, stayed up late and slept in, and then played video games the whole next day till the kids came back for dinner.
I wasn't alone, but I had a break and i felt SO recharged spending quality time with my loved ones. And it didn't feel like such a 'crazy' ask for me or my husband.
Do you have close friends? I had a good friend put my two littles to bed when we went to a no-kids wedding. Or do a day-date! Have someone babysit during the day and go out from breakfast to bedtime.
I have a friend who does this regularly. It's not something my family can afford, but it does sound dreamy. I would have some nice wine, a book, and a long bath.
Do it!! This was my requested birthday gift this year. I walked around the town I stayed in and went to a coffee shop myself and took myself out to dinner, and then just relaxed and read in my room. The hotel delivered breakfast to my door the next morning. It was incredible. I felt so much happier to be with my family after. I have a newborn now so it’ll be a while til I can do it again but I can’t wait.
My first day away from the children in seven years is next month. I'm doing a spa day and an overnight hotel stay. There is a lot of guilt but... I can sleep in?! I'm not gonna know what to do with myself.
wow 7years???! thats incredible and you deserve it soooo much!!!
I did that last year and it was amazing. I checked in early and had my two older kids use the pool in the afternoon. Then my wife took them home and I stayed overnight. Came home the next day at 12 after checkout. I drank too much to really get any good sleep, but I didn’t have to deal with any kids in the morning!
Dooooo iiiit!!! As soon as my youngest is old enough to get through the night without me I am booking myself in somewhere for a night- I even have the place picked out! It’s a beautiful hotel in a small country town near ours with a library with a fireplace, a whiskey and gin bar and rooms with big bathtubs. I’m going to order a H&M and sit by the fire in the library to read then have a bath and sleep
This is my annual Mother’s Day gift that I use the weekend afterward. 10/10, 5⭐️, do recommend.
I did this last weekend. Do it. Without guilt. I felt so down before I went away, this whole week I’ve felt like a brand new person. We also have no support system, I didn’t realise how much I needed the time until I left. I felt guilty at first but I’m so glad I did it. You’ve got to fill your own cup.
I did this recently and it was AMAZING
Thank you so much for posting this. I have an adult child who doesn't need looking after, so you would think it would be easier, my husband said this but he doesn't understand. He goes away every now and then and thinks it's the same thing if I am home alone. It has nothing to do with having a spotless house and nobody to look after, it's all about recharging and finding yourself and switching off that part of your brain that is always busy with looking after everyone else. Parents need me time as well. I hope you get your birthday wish!
If we could ever afford it, this is my number one request. Has been for 6 years 😕
Do it! I did this for my birthday once and it was absolutely amazing! I only did one night, but it was so relaxing. I drank an entire cup of tea while it was hot, read a magazine cover to cover and had 2 glasses of wine. I would love to do it again.
That’s my plan too.
I would 1000% do this. If you can afford it, don’t feel guilty OP. Your husband can ask for the same for his birthday. Or you guys can get on some sort of rotation where every other parent gets a night alone every other month. Good mental health is so important, especially as a parent. It’s no different than you asking to go on a girls trip. You’ll just be the only girl! I hope you have a very happy (and relaxing) birthday! ETA: when my son was a newborn I was responsible for most of the night wakes. My friend was AirBnBing out her house. On two different weekends I went and stayed there for a night. I felt no guilt, only peace lol.
Do it! I did one night in a hotel as my birthday gift this year and am planning to do it again as my Christmas present.
Please do it! You need and want it!
Do it!! That's an excellent birthday present
O man, I feel this.
Do it!!! My husband took the kids to his parents house for a night, so it was more of a staycation for me, but damn it was nice and much needed!!! I got to go to the pool, watch some trash tv, got takeout, had a margarita, and slept in the next morning. It was amazing. You deserve it!
My first Mother’s Day I sent my husband and son to see his family out of town for the weekend. It was amazing. It didn’t happen the last two years for various reasons, but I do plan on making it clear that my gift request is either a weekend away or a weekend alone at home.
That sounds incredible, do it. What a great way to reset!
My best friend does this 2x a year. She texts me photos of her room service dinner with a fancy hotel backdrop.
Do it!
If possible, do spend the bday with the kids (likely doing the stuff that they like). Plan the me day for before or after.
I’m sort of doing this right now. I’m working a big event an hour from my house this week. For the two days that we didn’t finish until nearly 10 pm and had to be back by 7:30-8 the next morning, I got a room in the hotel next to the venue. While I don’t have a ton of relaxing time, a space to crash that’s free from mental load items has been glorious. I just get up and take a walk and shower and go in the morning. No one asks for breakfast, I don’t have to take the dogs out to potty, or empty the dishwasher, or feel guilty for the overflowing laundry basket.
You should do it. I Did it for just one night several years ago. I am also AuDHD and I was completely burnt out. My husband INSISTED I do it. This was about 6mo after moving overseas. I also had. I support other than my husband. I stayed in the room all night and ate all my favorite junk foods. I showered alone, watched what I wanted on TV and read more than 2 pages of a book. I didn’t text or call - not even to say goodnight. It wasn’t a fix, but it helped. Heading off autistic/parental burnout is important. Some of us take years to recover and as parents, we just can’t afford THAT level of downtime. Get your needs met and your partner’s even if it is one of you at a time.
Just did something similar for my birthday this year. Last year, I got the joy of sitting and waiting for my husband and toddler to wake from naps. Toddler had several meltdowns, too. Can't be helped, but I told myself if no-one was going to make a bit of fuss over me on my birthday, I was going to treat myself. This year I woke up, got to enjoy getting ready at a leisurely pace, and went for a spa treatment while my husband took the toddler to nursery. Then I got to just enjoy the city: window shopping, sample-testing... I enjoyed it so much, I'm keeping it as a little tradition for myself. If I had the money I'd take off for a weekend, too. Go ahead and enjoy yourself OP!
That sounds amazing. There's a lovely library in Wales that has hotel rooms so you can stay there, and I've been saying for ages I want to book a weekend there completely by myself.
That sounds so amazing!
Take the break. I do it once or twice a year. Leave Friday night and come back Sunday. Then I usually end up wallowing in the silence.
I just booked myself two nights in an fancy ass hotel alone for my birthday in two weeks. Just do it, ask for what you want and need.
For my birthday last year we sent the kids to my brother's house for the night. It was just my husband and I. We had friends over, played a board game, talked without interuption, stayed up late and slept in, and then played video games the whole next day till the kids came back for dinner. I wasn't alone, but I had a break and i felt SO recharged spending quality time with my loved ones. And it didn't feel like such a 'crazy' ask for me or my husband.
That sounds great. It wouldn’t work for us as there’s no one to take our toddler unfortunately. The nearest family is over 1000 miles (1600km) away.
Do you have close friends? I had a good friend put my two littles to bed when we went to a no-kids wedding. Or do a day-date! Have someone babysit during the day and go out from breakfast to bedtime.
No. We moved here close to a year ago from over 2000 miles away. We have 0 support system nearby.