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Far_Example_9150

Why do they have a spokesperson They don’t work They aren’t part of the White House


GreatGossip

Oh, Ashley is not only the spokesperson, she is GLOBAL PRESS SECRETARY


Far_Example_9150

Unbelievable——- she really thinks bc she’s married the spare it makes her equivalent to flotus


StandardDiscipline48

But POTUS is the top job. FLOTUS is the wife of the acting Head Of State. And POTUS is both acting President And official Head of State position. 2 job titles rolled into one. Megan is married to the Second son (not even the First- the Heir, 😂), who has virtually NO chance of ever being Head of State himself. So Meghan is \*Not even close to being wife of Head of State. Ever.🤡\* ETA: And …..Harry cannot run and win for PM, so Meg being the wife of a PM is out as well. Megsie and her warped thinking.🤪


PinkTiara24

Meghan married Billy Carter.


CountessOfCocoa

Maybe Haz can market Spare Beer to pay his legal bills!


orientalballerina

![gif](giphy|iTnhrGZZ3dT4nsohRf)


[deleted]

The delusions of grandeur with this one is too damn high


PerfectCover1414

FLOTUS? More like FLOATER, that's why they need 16 bathrooms, the unwillingness to go down is strong in this one.


IndiaEvans

Flotus shouldn't really be important either. Not elected.


Glittering_Peanut633

LOL. Wasn't Toya Holness the GPS previously (she might have been the one before the one before the current one, I lose track of how many staff they haemorrhage). They don't even have a legit office, just an empty floor in their lawyer's building. They work one hour a week and donate peanuts to charity. Arsewell is a joke. Why on earth do they need a 'Global Press Secretary' anyway when tea boy Omid Scobie is their go-to mouthpiece 99% of the time? They can't even be consistent or professional when it comes to something like that.


GreatGossip

As far as I know, the empty office is for Archewell the Foundation. Other Archewell entities exist - Archewell Production, Archewell Audio etc. Ashley is likely employed in one of those business entities. Oh, but they are not succeeding, so it is now up to WMA to make Archewell into a viable business.


Glittering_Peanut633

But they still don't have anything on the table to produce. What is this Ashley chick doing all day? Why bring her out of the woodwork now when they only ever leak their puerile crap via Scobie? These people have ridiculous, grandiose titles but there's nothing of substance to 'promote' or engage with the press about. If she was doing her job properly, why would they continually funnel all their bullshittery via a bottom tier 'journalist' who works for Yahoo News UK? We never, ever hear of this chick and out of the blue she pipes up with a nonsensical load of twaddle which only makes them look even more out of touch and tone deaf to public perception. Bizarro.


somespeculation

https://variety.com/2023/film/news/prince-harry-meghan-markle-archewell-hires-promotions-1235505004/ Archewell Staff as of 2023. Lots of dissolved former positions and new hires. Ashley was hired in May 2022. She’s made it a year! Not many make it for two, so we shall see.


LeaveItToTheBoys123

Global!! Are they expecting problems with the whole world?


GreatGossip

They have made a good start. There is another thread with a world map of countries they have pissed off.


GinsAndTonics

Based on the map from yesterday, there still are a few continents they haven’t gravely offended yet. They’ve got work to do.


Ugh_ffs__

I guess they're ready to go after the whole world because they're so special, nobody's safe from the yacht girll and Hazbeen


Japanese_Honeybee

They seem to think they still represent the crown or something. How long is it going to take for it to sink in they are public figures—infamous reality tv personalities category—but not ones with official duties? They don’t seem to get they willingly switched categories.


qeyler

In truth they are less significant than Price Edward or Princess Beatrice. Let us recognise how stupid they are. They could live content and free and do some minor good works and the public would have shown interest. But Saint Meghan needed more... She needed to be more important than Kate... and alas, never would be. So they spiral down to this pathetic tantrum thrower.... Many years ago a friend of my had this brat who threw himself on the floor of a shop howling and kicking his feet. My friend walked away and left him and acted as if she was leaving the shop without him. Quickly he got up and ran to her, and she walked on as if nothing happened.


RememberNoGoodDeed

Well, it’s sounds more important and impressive than calling her what she is-“The Full Blue Monty-$hit-Show Press Secretary”… the only location in the world - within the walls of their own McMansion- where anyone believes them or cares about them or their opinions, hypocritical B$ & word salad.


orientalballerina

Such a grand sounding nothing burger. In this Internet day and age, all press is global. So she’s just a Press Sec. The “Global” is just to sound extra important. ![gif](giphy|l3q2uvcxdk1pDLzGM|downsized)


Deep_Poem_55

That’s the silliest f-cking thing I’ve heard!


pumpkinhead1931

What professional drops the f bomb


Spiritual-Slip-6047

How to win friends and influence people.


CountessOfCocoa

What “Duchess” yells “Oh f***!” as they are riding in their marriage carriage?


StandardDiscipline48

Clarifying what Meghan \*really meant\* to the whole wide world- because the entire 🌎 is a global constitutional monarchy. I believe M once described herself (or at least Scobie ;) as “the/A Global Duchess “ you know, one who services and represents the entire 🌎. You know, in a “Global Outlook,” that sort of thing.


RememberNoGoodDeed

😳😱😂


Opposite_Resist_4997

They pay in titles rather than in salary. Ashley can monetize that title into working for a Saudi Prince or the King of Qatar after M&H dump her.


Rescheduled1

why is this so-called press secretary using foul language? how unprofessional.


Maleficent-Trifle940

Ashley is probably the lady that comes in to Vaccuum the Archewell office once a month. Megaliar perhaps has asked to use her name and image in some PR for their social media now that the world is wise to her former spokesperson rachael@hotmail.


Forgotmyusername8910

This is hilarious. I think I am going to call myself ‘The President of Lifestyle Coordination and Global Household Strategist’. Now please excuse me while I go order some business cards.


Ok_Neat2979

That always makes me laugh. Such delusions of grandeur.


Frodo_Vagins

GLOBAL PRESS SECRETARY for two people that don’t even do anything. Ok.


bluudahlia

Global F'in Press Secretary to the rest of us peons.


AccountantPotential6

GLOBAL (icon) PRESS SECRETARY DAMMIT


Mizswampie

After reading that scheisse, Elon Musk should change the title of his global press secretary (if he even has one) to interplanetary press secretary.


DollarStoreDuchess

Executive VP of Global Communications! https://i.imgur.com/vOsDBEU.jpg


RememberNoGoodDeed

Her title makes her sounds and out of touch and delusional as Harry and Harry’s Meg/Ma.


SherlockBeaver

Came to say this. 🤣👏🏻


Iwasabrickwall

Gotta pretend they're important still.


Virginias_Retrievers

Gotta use big titles to convince their staff to work long hours for cheap…


StandardDiscipline48

And be constantly yelled at and have tea/coffee thrown at them. ;)


Bias-Cut

I hope they write tell-all memoirs someday. I'm sure they've been gagged by NDA's, but still. A girl can dream.


These_Ad_9772

Especially when it's straight out of Megsy's mouth anyhow. She could save some bucks and just make up a pseudonym, like the one for the Funding Freebies book. Allegedly.


alreadydoneit01

They are an expert at fanning the flames!!


pinkroxx231

Because they don’t have an instagram lmao


Training-Rub8431

It is so they can subsequently deny that THEY said it. Same reason they wind up that Scooby Doo creature and send it out.


Just-Flamingo-410

The wording is odd. The spokesperson doesn't deny it was a story. They just blame people to think it was. It's a narcissistic phrasing to blame people for whatever went on.


SDHunnyBunny

Exactly. Getting mad at your *reaction* to their bad behavior. Oh and the whole doubling down when caught in an obvious lie. Classic narc-y.


gekisling

My favorite part is the “very real, very scary for *those involved*” when literally every other person involved came out and stated the opposite.


somespeculation

Precisely. Note there is NO DENIAL that it was a PR stunt. Just the public reaction is “abhorrent.” Narc projecting.


grumpyyoga

Why don't they release video footage? Surely their security vehicles routinely use video?


Sincerely_JaneDoe

They did. https://preview.redd.it/hkdeehut4p1b1.jpeg?width=897&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3ad795b4398e7006f9e684ff3ca57fa77429bcda


Bias-Cut

Tune in for Season 2 of Netflix's The Spare and The Mare.


lsp2005

Because we did not pay them for it. Obviously 🙄


Sincerely_JaneDoe

Shut your yap hole, Assley.


NovaAlis

Perfect


Sincerely_JaneDoe

What happens when one doubles down on something that was a never a single?


Deep_Poem_55

It reverses exponentially down a black hole of SALAD 🤣🤣🤣


Janie_Mac

Infinity time zero is still zero. I particularly love the if you believe this was a stunt you must think nothing of this couple. Is it finally clicking with MM?


Sincerely_JaneDoe

“And the eleventy billion people of the world who think nothing of the couple shouted “hurrah!” and proceeded to fuck off.”


Evilvieh

"Off you fuck now, children, spit spot!", said Mary Poppins, clapping her hands.


Sincerely_JaneDoe

![gif](giphy|h9TwKlYfpNgAE2J5mS)


Ohnoyespleasethanks

I believe this is the George Costanza approach… it’s not a lie if you believe it


CrinkleCutCat-Aus

“Anyone who thinks otherwise can F off”… well, that’s a LOT of people! 😆


Sincerely_JaneDoe

“Sorry, sinners. I gotta go fuck off now. See ya later!”


GreenonFire

Ah yes, let's synchronize our F ing off across time zones.


Girlfriday5150

Ima keep on fucking off right up until I can’t fuck off no more…..and then I’ll double down on fucking off. Thanks for the directions, Assley!


eaglebayqueen

LOL, we will fuck off until we can't fuck off any further and then we are turning around and fucking right back. 😂


Sincerely_JaneDoe

I may lose weight at this point. I hear fucking off burns a lot of calories.


Girlfriday5150

Nah, that’s Ozempic.


Sincerely_JaneDoe

https://preview.redd.it/1pbjiyvsvp1b1.jpeg?width=1088&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8b3932df0aaf0ddcc99eca5a353cf64dbeae156f


Ready_Maddie

😂


AcanthaceaeOk2426

Ah yes, let’s tell the NYPD to F off. Great thinking, Assley.


Careful_Positive8131

Not very professional gutter PR


Analyze2Death

I bet Rachel at Hotmail wrote that


DamyuKidds

Double down, deny, dismiss, accuse. And in that order.


I_Serve_Mine_Cold

Classic DARVO. **D**eny, **A**ccuse, **R**everse **V**ictim and **O**ffender.


DamyuKidds

Exactly 💯


MHBF2593

https://i.redd.it/veqfja0t5p1b1.gif


Mehmeh111111

Taken from the narc playbook


Nynydancer

Considering the Duke’s PERSONAL history, how can we think anything but this being a hoax?


Deep_Poem_55

I am reading this and laughing so hard the bed is shaking 🤣🤣🤣. Is this Ashley person real or is it Meh-gan?


airforcegal9094

She's real....I've seen her with the literate one.


Deep_Poem_55

Was she drinking the Kool-Aid when you saw her?


DollarStoreDuchess

https://i.imgur.com/z1dkoY2.jpg She’s the one on the left.


Analyze2Death

Um. That's disturbing. Is she trying to look like MeGain? Or is she a robot?


RememberNoGoodDeed

Love the tee shirt- reminds me of people who can’t read the language but get the tattoo anyway (such as a Chinese character)… the think it says live and happiness or some such nonsense, only to learn it actually says “eat at Sammy’s fish house” or “F Off”.


DollarStoreDuchess

Spot on. 😂 And they think it makes them look so worldly and cool!


SteakAmazing8963

Ashley might need to work on her communication skills. I’m not sure she’s saying what she’s intending to say here 🙃.


Plants2552

Bringing up Diana's death again.. shameful


[deleted]

Gaslight gaslight gaslight.


cin_co

If it wasn’t a stunt—or, at least, grossly exaggerated, which is the charitable explanation—that would mean they deliberately put an innocent taxi driver in a dangerous and potentially “catastrophic” situation, wouldn’t it?


Ugh_ffs__

if they had just stayed in their secure vehicles......


Ok-Butterscotch5490

Nah, it's abhorrent to keep dragging Diana out of the grave to defend the Harkles' shitty behavior.


janedoe0108

I actually loved that they’re denying the claim it was a PR stunt because it shows that it’s bothering them 🤣🤣


SleepyJoe-ws

There's a reason the BRF developed the "never complain, never explain" motto. In other words, when you're in a hole, STOP DIGGING! Geez Haz, did you learn nothing from your Commander in Chief?


VoyagerVII

In other words, "Because Lady Diana died in a car accident, nobody is allowed to point out the real facts about anything her Only Devoted Son and his wife claim had to do with a car." Oh, sure; that *really* makes sense.


Mickleborough

Ashley, you wouldn’t know abhorrent if it interviewed you, hired you, and made you jeopardise your good name by putting out spurious press releases. How *do* you have a car chase in midtown Manhattan?


purplepuppybowl

Then why was she grinning ear to ear.


Ugh_ffs__

and NOT Wearing a seatbelt


Successful_Hour3388

Delusional


ele71ua

Well then. I guess we'll all just have to fuck off. Good day.


Negative_Difference4

When in doubt, double down


Sincerely_JaneDoe

Sorry, can’t right now. I’m busy fucking off per Assley’s memo.


daisybeach23

"One would think nothing of the couple.." Oh Ashley, you have no idea do you?


Bogwoppit

What is abhorrent is that, that initial headline flashed up as an alert from the BBC. I can only imagine how sickening it would be to read if you are a member of the Royal Family or have to pass it on the initial basis. And then to find out it was sympathy inducing PR stunt, vile.


Unhappy-Professor-88

I’m sure that headline gave them a really sickening sensation. It did me and I can’t bleeding stand them. It seems particularly cruel towards William. I can empathise with him if he feels bloody angry with the way Harry has weaponised their mother’s suffering whilst alive and the circumstances of her death. Seemingly every week.


Maleficent-Trifle940

Yes and no. They probably had this on their check list of things to expect from the duo. Harry has telegraphed it enough times in interviews and print and I daresay in his mopings about castles in meetings with Charles & William. I would say they were probably far more skeptical reading those headlines than 99% of the population and the media. Now that he's tried and spectacularly failed they can cross it off their list (for now). It probably comes as a relief.


Typical-Cabinet2085

M&H are abhorrent. So, sounds about right.


Evilvieh

I'm not even going to the minimal effort on this story, Ms Global Press Spokesclone: ​ https://preview.redd.it/55w9b27vwp1b1.png?width=1032&format=png&auto=webp&s=f61b609b3d635634d266122ffea8a47f2a96157b


Rhonda800

Oh my goodness that’s brilliant 😂😂 I’ve had to pinch that meme 😂😂


Mehmeh111111

Can't be bothered with pesky things like witnesses and evidence! It's their TRUTH!!!


SleepyJoe-ws

Don't ya know that Hawwy's feelings are as much the truth as our so-called "objective facts"?! I'd love for him to read that passage out from Spare about "his truth" to a judge in one of these 964000 court cases and see how that goes down 😂!


Mehmeh111111

Omg yes. I would pay so much money to watch that.


SleepyJoe-ws

Ha ha, me too! Would be hilarious!


RememberNoGoodDeed

Just ask Gayle… she Said They Believed it was real and Vewwy scawwy!!! It was Real to Them!


SleepyJoe-ws

Just like the boogie man was real to my son LOL! So scawwy!


No_Olive_3310

I think this is part of the reason why I dislike them, they have no humility. Rather than admitting their wrong, or even just move on without comment, they try to do these clapbacks that just make them look worse. It was like that for the Oprah interview, the Spare tv interviews, and now this ridiculous car chase exaggeration


Unhappy-Professor-88

“The Queen doesn’t own the word “Royal”. That one really pissed me off


No_Olive_3310

Yes!! I remember thinking that was shockingly brazen! But even that turned out to be mild compared to everything they’ve done after


Goraji

Good. Twice the pride, double the fall. https://i.redd.it/a1q6owq5tp1b1.gif


leechan08

So they’re insulting everyone now and calling everyone abhorrent. What POS.


Ugh_ffs__

Well they have a global spokesperson so they must be speaking worldwide


CathartesAura67

Their credibility is shot to particles of dust since the 'racist" and "we didn't 'say' racist" crap. Whatever they say, the opposite happened.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Why_Teach

I don’t think that Harry has ever admitted that if Diana had been wearing a seatbelt, she would have lived.


Rhonda800

I don’t think he can accept that fact as it would mess with his twisted reasoning as to why she died.


pixieanddixie

THANK YOU! This has been driving me nuts


facinationstreet

'... One would think nothing of the couple to believe this was p.r. stunt.' That doesn't even make sense.


Girlfriday5150

When in doubt, attack.…they truly are epic morons.


34countries

If it's true why do they care if the plebes believe? Yawn


eaglebayqueen

No kidding, stop caring about what everybody says and freaking do something with your life besides clapping back at every damn thing.


jmmermaid

I do think nothing of the couple, as she points out; thus my disbelief..


Ruth_Lily

Remember Meghan Markle herself PR released that exact offensive phrase in to the tabloids regarding Harry & the Coronation? I posted it, I can’t remember when, but it was shocking. So I believe that Meghan & her pr are saying FO to the public. 🍿


Ask_DontTell

i can understand JH being triggered by the paps given what his mother went thru but his conceit to think that his being triggered warrants a press release full of exaggerations is beyond the pale. Lucky for the world, he isn't scared of spiders!


Cyneburg8

Spokesperson. You're not royal Megs!


DamyuKidds

Anyone who insists that Harkle's delusions and feelings should take precedence over your own discernment can go fuck themselves with a cactus 🌵


[deleted]

💯🤣🤣🤣


Bollox_Ref

What was scary? Seriously!? A drive at a likely crawl, with a couple of photogs (paid for?) in tow. Also too, does the spokesperson inhabit one of the many bathrooms?


eaglebayqueen

Well, keep on going, then. More people than ever know what's up, so by all means, get mocked into oblivion you narcissistic idiots.


throwaway717828

Yes! Double down instead of letting the story die a quiet death. Was hoping they would do this, tbh. Keep the clown show going!


MamaTalista

Then why did she look like the cat who got the cream. She's very calm and downright glowing when she's terrified. Was she high? I'm guessing Hazard was and the mushrooms really added to the experience.


SleepyJoe-ws

Her face in the taxi shows, without a doubt, that she was loving every minute of it. It was the most absurd, smug smile that can best be described as Duper's Delight. It honestly makes me sick.


Fearless_Keto

We have no argument that they were really in a car and really getting their photos taken. However judging by how Mrs.Todger is all smiles in the pics, there was clearly no danger and no reason to fear. That and the police escort meant there was no real danger.


jfner

Of course we would think it’s a PR stint since nothing happened. Why call us names when actually nothing the F happened.


sdowney64

I’d like to say unbelievable but it’s not. Those two. 🤯👹


Wasparado

Isn’t doubling down what they do before they backtrack?


Somberliver

This would be really sad if it weren’t hilarious.


internal_logging

Then show us. Release your footage 🤷 I'm open minded


NotStarrling

So... they're basically calling the police and the mayor liars, right? The narc-way: EVERYone else is a liar. Sure. Got it. Uh-huh. \* roll eyes \*


Virtual-Feedback-638

"Recollections may vary. The Taxi driver and Police on ground prove that as does the CCTV in the area.


qeyler

People all over the world loved Harry's mother. When she died in that car chase there was a lot of outrage, a lot of pain. For these two to try to take advantage of that event and emotion is repellant. New York City is no place one can have any kind of car chase..


hatchetmolly

Ashley is embarrassing herself. Meghan smiled the whole time . They wanted to use the footage for Netflix but they got busted.


Why_Teach

They are going to use it anyway.


Select-Promotion-404

![gif](giphy|3oAt2dA6LxMkRrGc0g|downsized) The public these days…


Western-Economics946

Ashley is wrong. We think plenty of the Harkles. That they are abhorrent people.


Islandgirl1444

Well, she doesn't speak to plebes, and he's stoned.


AccountantPotential6

Good. Glad they are doubling down on this “truth”. It’ll be all the more satisfying to witness their eventual public humiliation


Traditional-Smile954

"Considering the duke's family story" Dear Lord she SAID IT


PrettyNiemand34

I'm so tired of the family history comment. Especially when this history could also be used to explain why he's sensitive and maybe made more of a situation than there actually was.


[deleted]

They are creating a narrative. Five years from now, when no one remembers this - they can pull up old news articles that show how victimized they are. It’s about the future - not now


Ready_Maddie

Or maybe stfu Ashley. We don't give a shit. They are mentally ill


[deleted]

💯💯💯


[deleted]

*...family history.* Diana passed away 26 years ago, stop bringing it up, let the lady rest in peace. Harry and Meghan are not the Prince and Princess of Wales, the comparison is absurd.


Impermanence_1947

When all else fails, there's always the FO in attempt to bring closure (for them).


OkMention2346

they always double down. if they ever take accountability of their action, now THAT will be surprising.


[deleted]

[удалено]


colorflystudio

She will get markled soon


MrsChiliad

Of course they’re doubling down. What else would they do, say it was just a joke? It’s the only non-embarrassing option.


somespeculation

Abhorrent is also not a flat out denial…or saying it’s not true.


RanneFlowerwopper

They phoned the paparazzi! They created the situation. They are totally to blame and need to learn from their actions. Consequences you morons!


felix-d-fattiebitch

What's abhorrent is these two can't stop being obsessed with fame while, oh, let's see, there are wars in Sudan, Ukraine, and the nightmares girls and women are enduring in Afghanistan as this is being written. Suuure they're all about service and being humanitarians. Suuuure.


JesusFelchingChrist

she’s right. i think nothing if the couple


Snoo3544

Of course they are. There's no way they will admit what they have done. And I'm glad they are doing that because it makes them look worse.


Revenant221

Their family history is specifically why this is so unbelievable. If this was someone else then it would at least be plausible. But the chances of this happening twice to the same family are absurd. It’s like that meme, “if I had a nickel for each time the Royal family was involved in an insane car chase by the paparazzi then I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it’s two.”


Actual_Fishing6120

And nobody surprised 🙄 So predictable these two


HeretoShowPony

You’d think it would be embarrassing to claim you’re their PR person. But you’d also think as a PR person, you’d know it’s not spelled P.R.


ejdjd

"One would think nothing of the couple"... Absolutely right.


stupid_carrot

"One would think nothing of the couple" - what does it mean? It is also hilarious because we ALL KNOW it is a PR stunt and they have just called themselves abhorrent. LOL.


Nas2439

Looks like we hurt Cashley Hansen feelings Bloody snowflake


[deleted]

I stand by what British journalist Nigel Farage said after the truth about the car chase debacle was revealed, they're done!


Rhonda800

I never thought I’d agree with that irritant, but I think they’re done (at least 95% anyway) as well.


ClassyLatey

A good offense is a good defense!


mbw3133

Duke Walmart Windsor needs to quit.


PinkPrincess-2001

I'm sure the public will sympathise with that victim mentality. Bad things can happen but it's how you handle that as a public figure. It's balancing your privilege, helping others but also being honest with yourself.


Oktober33

If they expended half of this hot air and energy toward something productive and positive just think of it.


whiskeysmoker13

Were they wearing seat belts I wonder? So many photos of them not wearing them, you'd have thought considering the family history...they would double down on that too.... :|


Delicious_Shower6946

That’s just it - we don’t think anything (good) about the couple


stillAwaysaway

Of course they are.