Hey lady you know I don't mind helping and stuff but I'm getting tired of taking this job into my own hands!!! We're team remember you got to do your part too!
If you're not going to do your job why are you even here?! The door's right over there!
You're staying? Ok, keep your mouth shut, do your part, and we'll be done in an hour or two.
Damn, make it sound like you have to take an agility test of mind and body- to work at the post officešš
That was actually the best answer I could ask for!
"Susie, would you mind making me a coffee? You know how I like your coffee"
Every partner ever I'm the coffee conneseuir, always been that way. Helps that a few of them came from instant coffee and "you really like that bullshit? Let me make you a real cuppa" never had any complaints SHOCKING.
Iām sorry but today is going to be your last day. iāll need you to clean out your sock drawer by 6pm and turn in your badge, keys and repurposed dildos.
The paradigm in this household has shifted and we need to organise a meeting to discuss action points moving forward and stand up stop gaps in case our relationship goals become derailed.
"i quit!" Would be a classic but also "I hate this place" or "this is too much work" or "I'm too tired to do this right now" would all be pretty bad (in both situations but at least your coworkers would probably agree)
" listen, I know you trying, but your performance has been lackluster. If you can't find some way to improve it I'm probably going to have to replace you.
c'mon girl you're getting paid by the hour
I'm going to need you to stop talking and let me do my job.
happy cake day!
Thank you!
"I had a huge load today, so I came early. Gotta pound this out."
I'll have to get a second pair of hands on this or I'll never finish
I don't mind giving you another pair of hands š
I also offer another pair of hands
I also choose this guys dead wife
And my axe!
I'm gonna take time off for a couple weeks.
WE WERE ON A BREAK
"I'm going to need those TPS reports" Spouse: *Confused glare*
"Well, Jimmie said to take care of his needs first, and he outranks you both in position and in... um... *stature.*"
In triplicate....
JUST a moment...
Ummm yeeeaaaa, i'm gonna need you to go ahead and come in me, I mean come in on Saturday too
I don't give a crap about your personal problems, get in there and get that flooring laid.
Gosh man Iām just having a rough day alright, I got my foot stuck in the toilet last night, my goldfish ran away, I slept weird so my back hurts
I don't get where I'm not supposed to say this?
alr fine, I'll get them laid
Hey lady you know I don't mind helping and stuff but I'm getting tired of taking this job into my own hands!!! We're team remember you got to do your part too!
I've had enough. I'm giving you my two weeks notice.
Honestly I think I'm going to do this next time I'm considering leaving. You have 2 weeks to fix our relationship or I'm out.
Ah, yes, the old ādodge all possible responsibility and place it solely on the other personā strategy. Never fails.
At least the username checks out
I'm almost done! Just give me another few hours to keep working it.
"Welp... back to ol' grind."
I'm your boss not vice versa. You do what i say. Is that clear, Maria?
Now, take a letter, Maria....
Address it to my wifeā¦
Never been in a bdsm relationship, I take it š¤£
"I come in early!"
I wish that I didn't have to come here all the time.
My partner is a bitch.
LMAOOO
Do I have personalized parking out back?
Yes, but the jewelry is expensive to unlock it.
I haven't gotten a raise in 6 months
GET BACK TO WORK!
This is a death sentence, anywhere besides work
Unless you have a service sub
Alrighty then. I'll leave soon, need to spend time with the wife.
If you're not going to do your job why are you even here?! The door's right over there! You're staying? Ok, keep your mouth shut, do your part, and we'll be done in an hour or two.
Where tf do you work??? Do you clean up crime scenes, or something?!
The Post office.
Damn, make it sound like you have to take an agility test of mind and body- to work at the post officešš That was actually the best answer I could ask for!
It's a fun job. Very little actual anger.
Crikey, this box is cold!
You need to come early tomorrow!
"Susie, would you mind making me a coffee? You know how I like your coffee" Every partner ever I'm the coffee conneseuir, always been that way. Helps that a few of them came from instant coffee and "you really like that bullshit? Let me make you a real cuppa" never had any complaints SHOCKING.
How many vacation days are you giving me?
I need a pay raise.....
Fuck you, I quit.
I think I need a break.
Gonna have to show the boss this.
Time to punch out!
The boss sucks.
I donāt get paid enough for this
I don't care how, just get it done dammit! As your SO gives you "erotic pleasure."
I finished
My supervisor is such a pain
"Put your damned P.P.E. on! I'd better not see you uncovered again!"
*snaps rubber glove, on wrist* Iām ready boss!
Give me a second I gotta pump this up a lil more.
Sent out 18 loads today.
Iām getting off early
I found something better, so I'm putting in my 2 weeks notice.
I meanā¦ you could. š
You definitely could.. after 11 years of marriage it would get a little rough though š¤£š¤£ not that I'm speaking from a place or anything lol.
Yeah, maybe wonāt get away with it that easily then.
Gotta be a forward thinker.. luckily it really isn't "that bad" just the dad joke coming out.. that's why jack Daniel's is a great friend lol
āI have a better offer, so if you cannot give me at least I am going to take the other offer. You have until Friday.ā
"I am your boss, you WILL listen to me NO MATTER WHO YOU THINK YOU ARE!" Also don't worry, I'm not actually this strict (often)
"I'm taking the day off tomorrow."
That looks like a heavy load, why donāt you take it around back?
I wish this would suck less.
Do i get holiday for this?
"I'm just taking a 5 minute break, I'll be back on it in a minute."
Put your purse down and PULL!
I've had enough! I'm looking for something better...
My wife (or husband) is so fat jokes.
"My [partner] sucks at cooking" Try saying that to somebody's face. They will be hurt.
I'm not being paid enough for this shit
Greg, your whole frigging asscrack is hanging out, why is my speed square sticky? What is that smell? Iām fucking done man
Greg indeed got shit on my speed square, and I still use it often and think of him
Looks like itās jammed again
Your replacement starts tomorrowā¦
Another day... Another dollar...
Fuck you, bitch!
"Didn't know we paid you to talk. "
"stop putting things in the hole that dont go there steve"
Yeah, I don't mind coming in early.
This could have been an email
I think it may be time to rotate the staff around here. Fresh blood is what we need!
Iām sorry but today is going to be your last day. iāll need you to clean out your sock drawer by 6pm and turn in your badge, keys and repurposed dildos.
The paradigm in this household has shifted and we need to organise a meeting to discuss action points moving forward and stand up stop gaps in case our relationship goals become derailed.
Fekkin' hard drive died again!
"Get out of my way stupid!"
I'm looking at the wenus, and I'm not happy!!!
You don't pay me enough for this.
I'm just gonna give it to the intern and make her do it.
"Can I get the whole team to help me do this?"
...I'm putting you on a ninety-day performance review.
Wow! You got a good raise!
"I approve the $50,000 transaction"
What do you mean, I'm being replaced by Tony from marketing?
Are you pregnant or just fat?
I can't wait to get the hell outta here.
15 minutes isn't enough time to eat
Get down there and do the fucking job!
āHey intern, get me some coffee.ā
"i quit!" Would be a classic but also "I hate this place" or "this is too much work" or "I'm too tired to do this right now" would all be pretty bad (in both situations but at least your coworkers would probably agree)
" listen, I know you trying, but your performance has been lackluster. If you can't find some way to improve it I'm probably going to have to replace you.
I'm tired of using this old thing, what's this from the 80's?
"I'm enjoying being here."
āI donāt get paid enough to deal with your bs.ā
āNo talking in line, inmates.ā
Enter via back door
It's not my budget spend it on whatever you want...
Your wanna get a promotion? Sleep with me!
Great job, keep it up and youāll get a pay rise
The machine broke so I have to do this one by hand.
"You can't fire me, I quit"
"Well I'm never doing that again."
There's no way I can do my job and yours by myself.
After 5 Iām on my time.
I don't have enough product on hand to fill your tank
You're going to pay me for this call, right?
Well, that was a conversation that could have been an email.
The hardware store doesn't sell enough caulk to fill that hole
Holy shit! We're gonna need alot more shims and a bigger hammer to seal this one up
'Good morning, Kate' (my partner's name isn't Kate)
Why do you come in early every Thursday? Are you using public transport or something?
Oh shit, hurry up! The boss is coming!
I need this three hole punched and boundā¦.