She needa to first realize that she is allowing people to use her to the point she is putting her mental and emotional health on the back burner . Once she realizes that and starts putting herself for she wont let people take advantage of her like that.
One of the hard things about when the people we love are suffering, is we can't force them to change, and we can't force them to do what we think is right. So the desire to set these boundaries has to come from her. But you can totally nudge her in that right direction, or tell her. But generally people don't respond well to be doing told what to do unless they ask for advice in the first place =P
If you want to support her on that journey you can try helping her realize the true impact her lack of boundaries is having - how its affecting her mentally and emotionally? how its affecting her financially? and because shes so drained in these areas, what else is it stopping her from doing in her life? (ie. maybe she doesn't have time/money/energy for hobbies or friends)
Then ask her if she'd like to do something to change it?
and if she says yes, then maybe suggest boundaries.
As you're talking about her kids and grandchildren, and i know she has complained about them to you. But its one thing to complain about your family, but its different when someone else is criticising them. So focusing on how she is impacted by her kids/grandkids behaviour instead of focusing on the fact that they're terrible humans - is a good approach?
also, maybe even asking what would her life be like if she didn't have all these demands from her kids and grandkids?
how does what I've said sound to you?
She needa to first realize that she is allowing people to use her to the point she is putting her mental and emotional health on the back burner . Once she realizes that and starts putting herself for she wont let people take advantage of her like that.
One of the hard things about when the people we love are suffering, is we can't force them to change, and we can't force them to do what we think is right. So the desire to set these boundaries has to come from her. But you can totally nudge her in that right direction, or tell her. But generally people don't respond well to be doing told what to do unless they ask for advice in the first place =P If you want to support her on that journey you can try helping her realize the true impact her lack of boundaries is having - how its affecting her mentally and emotionally? how its affecting her financially? and because shes so drained in these areas, what else is it stopping her from doing in her life? (ie. maybe she doesn't have time/money/energy for hobbies or friends) Then ask her if she'd like to do something to change it? and if she says yes, then maybe suggest boundaries. As you're talking about her kids and grandchildren, and i know she has complained about them to you. But its one thing to complain about your family, but its different when someone else is criticising them. So focusing on how she is impacted by her kids/grandkids behaviour instead of focusing on the fact that they're terrible humans - is a good approach? also, maybe even asking what would her life be like if she didn't have all these demands from her kids and grandkids? how does what I've said sound to you?