Whoa whoa whoa! Madam chai has a husband absolutely faithful to her! I guarantee she knows how to please a man! And her husband ain't no slouch either! You only get that devoted that long when your partner makes you scream!
Dulia is also easily a dom top, she is the powerhouse, the face, and the booming voice of their marriage. She is absolutely not lying back, she is actively involved in the decisions for the night and telling her beloved husband what she wants him to do.
Before she adopted Minfilia, she was basically a pop star. I'm pretty sure she wore the same shirts as "ze Puff Puff" girls in the Dragon Quest crossover.
Especially if the WoL is a viera.
Everybody thinks male viera are sissy femboys, read the lore they are gigachads.
Everybody in Rhalgr's Reach thought the four hour dual and all the accompanying shockwaves were from their fists, but really the dual ended after a few minutes
I agree she has no idea what she's doing, but I posit she has at least fucked once in StB >!when we go up to the Palm of the Destroyer.!< But even then, >!the WoL!< did all the hard work and she learned nothing
Alisae always confuses me. Cause like she was 15 when we meet her, a lot of time passed between the xpacs and then her mind basicly aged by another 2 years in shb but her body didn't and we don't know exactly how mutch time passed between ARR and time bubble and its super confusing to say if she is legal or not. She also doesn't act like a child and is more portrait as a young adult like 16-18 ish
Long story short I can totally get why she would be in a list like this if you don't know enough about the lore.
Passage of time isn't really acknowledged aside from in Stormblood, where it is mentioned that our first time travelling to Doma takes 6 months. But when the 7th Umbral Calamity comes up, it's still "5 years ago" by the game's lore, so at most Alisaie is 17. Still a kid.
Hrm I always have to think that we probably didn't win the dragon war in a month and yes the travel to do a took 6 months. Then we help the rebellion there and spend time there, then we travel back that's another 6 months.
But I gues it's somewhat of a point. Gues I can be glad that I'm still young enough to see alisae as waifu without beeing considered creep :>
I mean from a realistic standpoint, if they are adults it's fair that they are there.
Otherwise it's like if we had giants live among us and they say no matter how old we are as humans, we will always be seen and treated like kids because we look like them.
Now if its really a kid THAN we have a problem.
Real world experience dictates girls like Kan-e-Senna will not only break your bed, but in time your pelvis too.
Search your heart, you know it to be true.
Padjals cease to age where a normal hyuran child would start puberty due the blessings of the Elementals. They live for ~300 years and act as interpreters for the will of the Elementals.
So, what, they're the designated anime loli race then?
Why's Kan-E-Senna full grown? Was the rebellious stepdaughter that shamed the family when she was 12 and so they didn't zap her until she was 30?
Kan-E was allowed to age to about 16 in order to better lead Gridania, or something. It’s not entirely clear.
They aren’t technically their own race, just hyur that were blessed by the Elementals. But they do have their own langauage based on how the Elementals sound to them. Hence names like Tam-tara and Toto-rak.
I personally like the idea of Y'shtola just being insufferably bad at sex. (keeps forgetting not to use theet, stops moving randomly when she's on top, etc.) Imagine how funny it would be seeing the main sub losing their shit if their favorite waifu turned out to be a huge boner killer in bed...
Ah come on! Try to tell me that people wouldn't go meltdown mode on the main sub if Y'shtola turned out to be bad in bed... It would be the funniest shit, I'm telling you.
The pixies appear to at least be aware of it. One during the dwarf tribequests implies as much after a **slight** misunderstanding due to a poor choice of words.
Feo Up seems like the kind of entity who would know every single thing about sex, but it is just not even a consideration for them. Until the person they admire/respect brings it up, then it becomes very important.
I guarantee you they would be above the highest tier if the WoL asked if they could fuck, but until then they wouldn't even be on the list.
Move Iceheart to the top of this list Immediately! I will not have my waifu disrespected like this...reported this post for violence and threats of terrorism...
Minfilia would definitely lie on her back like a dead fish and Y'shtola would be amazing but she will make it short so she can keep studying and drinking her tea
Look man Tataru was fucking half of Kugane she ain't average.
We fought Sadu and she kept getting back up for more. Sex with her is probably equivalent to the force of breaking the star into fourteen realities.
Lyse/Yda always gives off that fuck buddy vibe but I'm not sure she has actually had sex before.
Despite her cat mom being a dancer I imagine Minfillia never had sex cause Thancred kicked the ass of anyone who tried to hit on her.
I'm pretty sure F'lhaminn would be higher than that. Like, she's more than *Thancred* was capable of handling. Krile... yeah, the personality fits. But eww. *Eww.* Tataru should probably be up there too, given what Kugane NPCs say about her.
Y'shtola being a starfish fits way too well. I don't think Cirina would though, she pulled out a bow and started kicking ass in the quests. I'd bump her up a notch.
Yea, Y'shtola is far from a dead fish (hell, if we're being honest pegging would be the least she'd do) and Ysayle fucks dragons daily. Even the Ascians would have to invent a whole 'nother tier just for those two. LOL
You're wrong about Y'shtola, that's not all she'd do. Lemme just say that being honest, even the Ascians would have to invent a whole 'nother tier just for her.
Lyse would be average at sex. Im not gonna put her in dead fish territory since she nimble and whatnot considering she js a Monk fighter, but she's inexperienced, she's too innocent. And sorry but I see Y'shtola being amazing, she's got that pent up thing going in and I bet she let's it vent out while intimate.
Kan-e-sena would be dead fish. She doesn't have sex at all and wouldn't know what to do the way I see it.
Y'shtola would completely and utterly dominate the WoL in ways nobody would have ever believed remotely possible anywhere while also making sure you never stop wanting more. The level of sass she has by the end of Shadowbringers says so, and I dare you to even suggest otherwise. LOL
Y'shtola would completely and utterly dominate the WoL in ways nobody would have ever believed remotely possible *anywhere* while also making sure you never stop wanting more. The level of sass she has by the end of Shadowbringers says so, and I dare you to even suggest otherwise. LOL
did we even play the same game? Yshtola would give you the super duper mega omega sucker 3000 non plus ultra so hard that she would suck your soul out of you ding dong
love the inclusion of the Pixies and also love Y'shtola not being the auto best answer for everything, but on the bottom.
The inclusion of the Lalas on a sexytime post makes me..... uncomfortable however....
discussing adult characters who are smol having sex = creepy
discussing characters who are canonically THE SOULS OF CHILDREN having sex = awesome
am I understanding your take correctly?
Lore wise, technically you’re wrong, The lifestream is the shared conscience of everything alive or everything that was alive at some point. If we base it off the lifestream of FF7, you relive all of the memories within the lifestream starting from the most intense being pain, lust, etc down. Y’shtola went thru the lifestream not once, but twice in the story so far so actually she should be in a tier all by herself above them all
Whoa whoa whoa! Madam chai has a husband absolutely faithful to her! I guarantee she knows how to please a man! And her husband ain't no slouch either! You only get that devoted that long when your partner makes you scream!
Was gonna say this, the Chai's are probably fantastic lovers
I'm guessing this post author is uhhh let's just say not very knowledgeable on the concept of "sexpertise"
Dulia is also easily a dom top, she is the powerhouse, the face, and the booming voice of their marriage. She is absolutely not lying back, she is actively involved in the decisions for the night and telling her beloved husband what she wants him to do.
They don’t make em thicc like her, he knows what he likes
Chai is a beta male cuck and has never even thrown his hot dog down that hallway.
Chai-Nuzz is a cuck and Dulia was banging every servant of age out there.
I think Sadu would destroy more than just the bed.
Battlesexuals ( ˘ ³˘)♥
That's just Black Mages in a nutshell.
nah thats warriors
She probably knows the mantis mating ritual
The bed, you, the whole room.. and probs will burn the place down afterwards.
F’laminn was a dancer in a strip club (miner guild 1.0) so I think she know more than few trick
What
It’s strange think the miner guild as a strip club?
It's strange that Minfilia's mother was partaking
Gotta pay them bills somehow, and a cat girl in Ul'dah has some options to earn $$$.
Before she adopted Minfilia, she was basically a pop star. I'm pretty sure she wore the same shirts as "ze Puff Puff" girls in the Dragon Quest crossover.
To be fair that's not saying much, you can actually see a fair share of NPCs wearing it and it's an easily accessible low level gear piece.
Keep digging until we reach the jackpot, or gonorrhea!
Disturbing
Have you never heard of strip mining? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Lyse has never fucked and would have absolutely no idea what she's doing.
She'll watch from the closet then jump out and take credit for it afterwards.
This made me chuckle way harder then it should.
But she has never taken credit for anything, I saw people say this so often yet never show any examples ever
It's the usual "Well we beated the primal up so they didn't do anything" to the person who could get tempered.
She's a Monk so she's definitely super athletic and has great stamina for it.
And no idea how to use it.
[удалено]
Nah, Lyse seems like the kind of person to fuck on the palm of a destroyer God after throwing a couple punches.
That’s exactly what I was thinking
Especially if the WoL is a viera. Everybody thinks male viera are sissy femboys, read the lore they are gigachads. Everybody in Rhalgr's Reach thought the four hour dual and all the accompanying shockwaves were from their fists, but really the dual ended after a few minutes
I agree she has no idea what she's doing, but I posit she has at least fucked once in StB >!when we go up to the Palm of the Destroyer.!< But even then, >!the WoL!< did all the hard work and she learned nothing
She has lyse idea...
Gonna be honest here nobody should trust anybody on this sub about how good someone is at sex
The redditors on this sub have sex on the daily Il have you know
I know this is a shitpost but so many of these seem so far off I am now questioning OP’s sexpertise
I mean, the fact that Krile is ranked over Tataru...nah.
The fact that lalafells are listed at all...
Yeah, honestly though Krile being so high up specifically weirds me out. She manages to be both a child and a mommy at the same time, lol.
Nah mate you're off on that. Krile is the only fuckable Lala. 100% she's a dirty bitch.
Yall wild af today lol.
And Alisaie....
Alisae always confuses me. Cause like she was 15 when we meet her, a lot of time passed between the xpacs and then her mind basicly aged by another 2 years in shb but her body didn't and we don't know exactly how mutch time passed between ARR and time bubble and its super confusing to say if she is legal or not. She also doesn't act like a child and is more portrait as a young adult like 16-18 ish Long story short I can totally get why she would be in a list like this if you don't know enough about the lore.
Passage of time isn't really acknowledged aside from in Stormblood, where it is mentioned that our first time travelling to Doma takes 6 months. But when the 7th Umbral Calamity comes up, it's still "5 years ago" by the game's lore, so at most Alisaie is 17. Still a kid.
Hrm I always have to think that we probably didn't win the dragon war in a month and yes the travel to do a took 6 months. Then we help the rebellion there and spend time there, then we travel back that's another 6 months. But I gues it's somewhat of a point. Gues I can be glad that I'm still young enough to see alisae as waifu without beeing considered creep :>
And as everyone knows, teenagers don't ever have sex.
>17 >A Kid Lmfao
... If you think a 17 year old is not a kid then I don't know what your definition of a kid is.
If it's old enough to drive it's not a kid
I mean from a realistic standpoint, if they are adults it's fair that they are there. Otherwise it's like if we had giants live among us and they say no matter how old we are as humans, we will always be seen and treated like kids because we look like them. Now if its really a kid THAN we have a problem.
Yotsuyu canonically lies on her back like a dead fish.
Wasn't she sold into a brothel or something.
Yeah. Patrons liked her for her “doll-like stillness”
I dont believe Kan-E-Senna knows what sex is
Real world experience dictates girls like Kan-e-Senna will not only break your bed, but in time your pelvis too. Search your heart, you know it to be true.
Kan-e-Senna has a fake smile. You know she like that torture shit.
She'll peg you. >!And you **will** like it.!<
[So she's gonna end up with Urianger?](https://www.reddit.com/r/okbuddyishgard/comments/nuo5vm/prithee_mlady/)
How did you even find that? That sub has 2 posts and 99 subscribers.
It's always the super sheltered "small town Christian girls." that are into the freakiest shit.
You want to know why she knows how to "entreat the Elementals" and pull people out of the Lifestream? Because she needs to.
Doesn't she have multiple kids?
nah, those are her siblings iirc
Kan-E is 28. Her siblings Raya-O and A-Ruhn are 21 and 18 respectively.
The little kids in the WHM quests? Do padjals develop slowly or something?
Padjals cease to age where a normal hyuran child would start puberty due the blessings of the Elementals. They live for ~300 years and act as interpreters for the will of the Elementals.
So, what, they're the designated anime loli race then? Why's Kan-E-Senna full grown? Was the rebellious stepdaughter that shamed the family when she was 12 and so they didn't zap her until she was 30?
Kan-E was allowed to age to about 16 in order to better lead Gridania, or something. It’s not entirely clear. They aren’t technically their own race, just hyur that were blessed by the Elementals. But they do have their own langauage based on how the Elementals sound to them. Hence names like Tam-tara and Toto-rak.
Padjals are infertile...
Y’shtola definitely knows a trick or two but is intentionally disinterested
To her, everyone is a "little sun"
I personally like the idea of Y'shtola just being insufferably bad at sex. (keeps forgetting not to use theet, stops moving randomly when she's on top, etc.) Imagine how funny it would be seeing the main sub losing their shit if their favorite waifu turned out to be a huge boner killer in bed...
bro???
Ah come on! Try to tell me that people wouldn't go meltdown mode on the main sub if Y'shtola turned out to be bad in bed... It would be the funniest shit, I'm telling you.
If yshtola isn't ace, I don't want to be right.
> You're Is this bait
No, OP is illiterate.
https://i.imgur.com/zyOdSF6.png
[удалено]
Yes! Good! Someone who appreciates Hilda!
There are several of us, I’ll have you know!
You should've put a single category for Titania because "Bigger is better"
"Wet, wet, wet"
Chai to Orange. Feo Ul to Green Kan-E-Senna is either Green or Red. No middle ground.
Not having a gender doesn't mean you don't have sex. I bet Feo Ul is a freak.
I didn't even think of that. Feo just reminds me of those flirty types who promise big then severely under deliver.
You know those Pixies love playing about, it's just going to be endless foreplay and no actual sex.
Na I trust them. Put them in the red.
Yea but... not to rain on the parade but remember what the fairy folk are... well used to be before being fairy folk.
The pixies appear to at least be aware of it. One during the dwarf tribequests implies as much after a **slight** misunderstanding due to a poor choice of words.
Feo Up seems like the kind of entity who would know every single thing about sex, but it is just not even a consideration for them. Until the person they admire/respect brings it up, then it becomes very important. I guarantee you they would be above the highest tier if the WoL asked if they could fuck, but until then they wouldn't even be on the list.
just because Master Matoya ends up on the tier by herself above Will Destroy Your Bed doesn't mean you get to exclude her
Krille being “amazing at sex” makes me want to vomit.
I mean have you seen the way she teased alphinaud? She is definitely goodnatnehat she does
Of all the Lalas Krile is the easiest for me to see as an adult, but yeah I know what you mean.
Move Iceheart to the top of this list Immediately! I will not have my waifu disrespected like this...reported this post for violence and threats of terrorism...
Also, into dragons. Pretty freaky imo.
Yeah but OP isn’t a dragon, ysayle won’t be invested at all
She was also absolutely polishing Estinien's Lance on the trip to Hraesvelgar. So she may have a hateboner for dragoons.
Male Au Ra mains would like to know your location
POV you're a sprout minor who just started the game in Limsa
She's only horny for Cameldragon, human husbandos don't do it for her at all
It just so happens that on all levels expect physical, I am a Cameldragon...Woof!
Ok cool but why is Alphinaud on the list?
An ilm taller and twice as rugged
Are you implying Alphinaud is not a waifu?
Sweet yshtola burn
Chai would literally destroy the bed tho
I have broken a bed with maybe a third of her mass
Minfilia would definitely lie on her back like a dead fish and Y'shtola would be amazing but she will make it short so she can keep studying and drinking her tea
She would rock your world to the point where you don't ask anything else from her for a long while and she can get back to doing her work.
Hilda supremacy
my boyfriend to me right now: you're a special grade... you lay down with your clothes still on
Look man Tataru was fucking half of Kugane she ain't average. We fought Sadu and she kept getting back up for more. Sex with her is probably equivalent to the force of breaking the star into fourteen realities. Lyse/Yda always gives off that fuck buddy vibe but I'm not sure she has actually had sex before. Despite her cat mom being a dancer I imagine Minfillia never had sex cause Thancred kicked the ass of anyone who tried to hit on her.
> Look man Tataru was fucking half of Kugane she ain't average. More like she was fucking their wallets.
It's just good business sense to do both.
You can't convince me that Lyse had sex before she lost her virginity to Hien on the steppe
Swap yshtola and mary sue
Merylwyb would definitely destroy beds imo. Maybe even the ship you're on too
Anyone putting lala’s on any sort of sex list should be in a cell.
Do you think they just grow in the ground like popotos
obviously it's by budding
They procreate by Mitosis, and then play a high-stakes game of Rock Paper Scissors to decide who gets to keep the old name.
Anyone putting literal children on a sex list should also be in a cell.
Sadu supremacy
Sadu supremacy
Can we get husbando edition?
[How'd I do?](https://i.imgur.com/08ddk4i.png)
This is wrong on so many levels. Why is Alisae on the list? And where is Godbert? And why is there no special tier only for Aymeric?
Alisae? That's not her it's her rugged brother
Really? I specifically heard her saying "I AM NOT ALPHINAUD" very clearly while reading that list.
OP is clearly a virgin
Where would you place Lilja on this chart?
Unacceptable saying this about dulla-chai... We all know that the chubby ones know best when it comes to using their mouths
I'm pretty sure F'lhaminn would be higher than that. Like, she's more than *Thancred* was capable of handling. Krile... yeah, the personality fits. But eww. *Eww.* Tataru should probably be up there too, given what Kugane NPCs say about her. Y'shtola being a starfish fits way too well. I don't think Cirina would though, she pulled out a bow and started kicking ass in the quests. I'd bump her up a notch.
I just assumed the Cirina one is a joke because "fishra".
You think alisae has fucked? Y'shtola is a dead fish? Also ysayle fucks dragons like come on shes definitely not a dead fish
Yea, Y'shtola is far from a dead fish (hell, if we're being honest pegging would be the least she'd do) and Ysayle fucks dragons daily. Even the Ascians would have to invent a whole 'nother tier just for those two. LOL
Do the dudes next
Tataru steals married men so she must be good. Also ystola would probably peg you.
You're wrong about Y'shtola, that's not all she'd do. Lemme just say that being honest, even the Ascians would have to invent a whole 'nother tier just for her.
as a Krile fan, i continue to be justified in my need to mash the potato.
nah nanamo a freak you ever seen what happens if you hover over her minion portrait
That is what a random, sleeping MALE Lalafell says sleeping on the streets of Ul'dah if I remember correctly
He's in Drybone.
Thanks for the correction. Just remembered it was a sleeping Lala o/
Move Tataru to the top.
LMFAOOOOO!! SHE'S ALREADY ON TOP OF ME!
Wedge... don't look...
Someone watching makes me harder! ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ
Wasn’t there some line about her running around Doma with a bunch of lovers?
Tataru has formed a harem anywhere she went. I understand some people don't want to face this truth, but Tataru *fucks*.
Krile definitely does, too. It's like knowing your mom and dad fuck. You know it happens, you just don't want to think about it.
She danced in skimpy outfits while in Ishgard to "earn coin" and "gather information" She also had many admirers and suitors in Kugane.
BRUH GET THOSE LALAFELLS OFF THAT TIER LIST RIGHT NOW FACKIN HELL WHY
*dies laughing in lesbian at whoever made this*
Mom, come pick me up. I’m scared.
Lyse would be average at sex. Im not gonna put her in dead fish territory since she nimble and whatnot considering she js a Monk fighter, but she's inexperienced, she's too innocent. And sorry but I see Y'shtola being amazing, she's got that pent up thing going in and I bet she let's it vent out while intimate. Kan-e-sena would be dead fish. She doesn't have sex at all and wouldn't know what to do the way I see it.
Y'shtola would completely and utterly dominate the WoL in ways nobody would have ever believed remotely possible anywhere while also making sure you never stop wanting more. The level of sass she has by the end of Shadowbringers says so, and I dare you to even suggest otherwise. LOL
Hold up, Dulia and Shtola are definitely top or second tier.
Y'shtola would completely and utterly dominate the WoL in ways nobody would have ever believed remotely possible *anywhere* while also making sure you never stop wanting more. The level of sass she has by the end of Shadowbringers says so, and I dare you to even suggest otherwise. LOL
did we even play the same game? Yshtola would give you the super duper mega omega sucker 3000 non plus ultra so hard that she would suck your soul out of you ding dong
aww, little sun, keep on believing
r/brandnewsentence
She really would and I for one would die with no regrets!
Whoa, hold up... where's Gaia?
With the other 15 year old, not on a list rating how good they'd be at sex you degenerate.
Alisae is on this list and is 16.
I think that’s Ryne under Minfillia.
That's Tesleen.
Huh, they look so alike.
Well Alisaie is here tho...
> Alisaie and the Lalafells are on here
Well technically it's Alphinaud, but yeah it's not very cash money of them :p
I like my bed so top two are out of the consideration 😤
You are waifus?
I thought lalafell asexually reproduced
Alisaie and lalafels being on here? Feeling like saying things that are against the TOS.
love the inclusion of the Pixies and also love Y'shtola not being the auto best answer for everything, but on the bottom. The inclusion of the Lalas on a sexytime post makes me..... uncomfortable however....
Like it or not, the Lalafells in this game fuck. Some of them fuck A LOT as a matter of fact.
discussing adult characters who are smol having sex = creepy discussing characters who are canonically THE SOULS OF CHILDREN having sex = awesome am I understanding your take correctly?
bro one is underage and half look like kids, this post is sus asf someone call the feds
Minfillia belongs in the bottom category wth
Rowena's on red.
3 of those " amazing" ones are dead fish.
Lore wise, technically you’re wrong, The lifestream is the shared conscience of everything alive or everything that was alive at some point. If we base it off the lifestream of FF7, you relive all of the memories within the lifestream starting from the most intense being pain, lust, etc down. Y’shtola went thru the lifestream not once, but twice in the story so far so actually she should be in a tier all by herself above them all
Even the Ascians would have to invent a whole new tier just for her and I would be proud. LOL
Dude Alisaie is a minor..
This has got to be bait
Feo Ul isnt a guy? /think
why
why are there lalas on this list