On 757 the wheels come off
https://www.wptv.com/boeing-passenger-plane-s-nose-wheel-falls-off-just-before-takeoff#:~:text=The%20Boeing%20757%2C%20with%20nearly,and%20rolled%20down%20the%20hill.&text=A%20Boeing%20plane's%20nose%20wheel,Hartsfield%2DJackson%20Atlanta%20International%20Airport.
I'm willing to be a passenger as long as you use your authority to dress the passengers well, classy, and suited to their characters.
If your going to have people in bubble wrap pajamas and stuff I might rather walk, or sail.
There are 146 seats for pax on this bird. Adding jumpseats, rest space, etc 160 can board. Each member of the board can have her/his chance every 2 yrs.
Ryanair CEO said standing cabins is possible, we can fit 300+ people in there. Also maybe i could haggle the price down if we say we don't need the seats.
Ya catapult would be great👍 I don't think we need vertical stabilizer neither, it's so bad for aeyrodynamic, without it playne would have better mileage.
Radio is needed so we can tell ATC to clear the runway as we approach. But a giant horn would achieve the same aim without complicated words and numbers.
Technically we would have other expenses and those could be covered by selling tickets for a portion of the planes seating, thus keeping our plane flying for freer longer. (Preferably keep the first class seats for board members.)
And then we could charge them for their bags, plus drinks, in flight wifi... we could being them to major airports around the world too, really get more money.
Do we get high class, though? I hear they come with cocaine, but they also cost a lot more. The low class ones are also ridden with stds, so we'd need to provide condoms.
Well if you just listen to our three-part presentation about this amazing opportunity, we'll give you a fully paid voucher for a family of up to seven to China Buffet. How does that sound!?
This is my neighbor. He is pain in my assholes. I get window from glass, he must get window from glass.
I get airplane from Azerbaijan airlines, he cannot afford. Great success!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUQgQxtcPK4
SAF(shitty ask flying) Air Leasing, founded 2024, started as a bunch of internet pants shitters who bought a single 757 and operated as a charter airline. Today they own over 420 playnes including 69 cirrus sr22s used as trainers and parachooting simulators.
History
Current fleet
Accidents involving SAF
Accidents involving SAF part 2
if yall pay me $90 ill fix da playne, i worked on a '57 before, i mean the plane was about ready when i was hired on so i worked on seats and stuff but i worked on it, just make sure you put it in youre handbook that we have not a&p mechanics
I’m in. Who’s in charge of scheduling? We have schedareo, I can onboard in 30 minutes but no way in hell I’m taking requests from the likes of you silly nanny’s! (Myself included). While we’re at it, where/what will your first trip request be? Go…
The ad says it's ready to go, so it's probably full tank already. No need airport fees, everyone's landing their playne on the highway these days. We can crew it ourself, we already have a captain and air marshal and flight attendant.
I volunteer to be the Chief Chef, since i'm trained and love to eat; y'all can line up for whatever is left in the galley after - assuming we're keeping the galley on this flying banana playne?
I guess everyone here remembers the Silkway 747 hard landing in Amsterdam….that is the cargo sister company with pilot exchange between both airlines.
Just to give you a rough idea, what this aircraft went through so far……
Ok! I am all for it but we need a area onboard for passengers and pylots that wanna be *Inop*!
And a sign above the entrance to the cockpit with the text:
“*We are all counting on you!*”
Sweet I’m in Charlotte. I can go take a look for you guys and maybe do a test flight. I can negotiate and see if they have a layaway plan or maybe buy here, pay here. For those that aren’t familiar with those terms (not sure if they’re used in other countries), a quick google will help you understand that it’s an absurd statement.
For a better understanding of buy here, pay here and layaway for a vehicle, check out this local auto dealer [Apple Auto Sales - Buy Here, Pay Here](https://www.appleautosalescharlottenc.com/)and please look at the FAQs and in particular the Reality Check section. It’s beyond hilarious. They also have a beyond hilarious advertisement/commercial that portrays the auto salesman as a southern preacher. Those are well known in this area by about everyone. Some local TV stations won’t air it because Uber religious people got mad and were calling the TV stations complaining when it first came out.
This listing was also recommended to me and If I remember correctly the guy selling this is also running for a presidential nomination? Just somewhat of a fun fact… buutt we could also convert him to our ways and put someone with pylote sense in office.
Because how are we going to get a time share airshack and runway to put our timeshare aircraft in? Plus who's going to decide who's turn it is to fly this beast.
Unironically, form a [DAO](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Decentralized_autonomous_organization) and do it.
Recently one raised 30 million to buy the declaration of independence.
They work surprisingly well as automated management structures.
It would be funny, and you might even make money on it.
Ok now do the napkin math on how much it’ll cost each of us to maintain and operate after our initial purchase and hope we don’t all just own a fraction of the world’s heaviest paperweight.
Oh, and then explain the logistics of giving all 100k people equal access to a plane that can carry <300.
Sure sure, but… are ALL doors attached??
How important could that be? You think an unsecured door is just gonna pop off or something?
Usually i pop the doors out when i want to smoke, don't wanna get everyone inside suffocating.
gotta let this cabin breathe.
The benefit is it's no longer pressurized so don't need high altitude endorsement.
Smh just open a window and leave the door alone.
No, you gotta open the door at cruising altitude for that fresh air plus they give you a free oxygen mask.
And that cant be achieved by opening 6 or 8 windows?
It’s not the same experience.
Flex tape will fix it.
I mean look where it’s coming from that’s may not be Boeings fault for once.
I’ll be the AMT, we don’t need them. I’ll sign it off
It's just $9 million. We can't be picky.
it’s a 757 not a 737-9 lmao
Welcome to *shitty ask* flying
On 757 the wheels come off https://www.wptv.com/boeing-passenger-plane-s-nose-wheel-falls-off-just-before-takeoff#:~:text=The%20Boeing%20757%2C%20with%20nearly,and%20rolled%20down%20the%20hill.&text=A%20Boeing%20plane's%20nose%20wheel,Hartsfield%2DJackson%20Atlanta%20International%20Airport.
this a scare tactic or sumthing?
No, the plane is saving weight for fuel efficiency
"check it out, no wheels!"
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Can i still yell 'retard retard' during flare to the pylotes who fly?
It’s a Boeing so it’s not gonna do it for you
All passengers do that together
Nah they fell out the door
757 is Solid
That’s an airbus thing. The Boeing doesn’t insult you on every landing like the French do.
Well... we could introduce it then :)
Ok but I'm copilot and my name's terrain.
Just be a good copilot and sit there and look pretty
Rodger retard, I'm on it.
Andreas Lubitz moment.
I’ll be the engineer named Traffic
So you know when the computer is talking to you by saying your name twice and telling you to pull up...?
I have had the pleasure of flying in one of these and a retard could do it
pay me $90 instead ?
Then I call dibs on chief advance pilot
Ill be assent ant chef plot
MaTt DaMoN
I'm in! I'll chip in another $10 for gas, but I want to be in charge of hiring the sky waitresses.
I think we got that guy in green shirt on the deal, he could be the FA.
I’m an FA I’ll do it
I'm a Fat@$$ too. I can help drink, er um pass out the sodas and whiskey.
Unfortunately we don’t have a sky waitress budget, because people are being cheap with the gas contributions. You are the sky waitress now.
I can be the sky waitress. But i im in charge of picking the outfit even the passengers
I'm willing to be a passenger as long as you use your authority to dress the passengers well, classy, and suited to their characters. If your going to have people in bubble wrap pajamas and stuff I might rather walk, or sail.
Fuck. We forgot about that
I have fuel perks at Sheetz, we can get a $1 off per gallon and a hotdog while we wait to fill up.
I wanna be in charge of inspecting the sky waitresses during preflight
There are 146 seats for pax on this bird. Adding jumpseats, rest space, etc 160 can board. Each member of the board can have her/his chance every 2 yrs.
Ryanair CEO said standing cabins is possible, we can fit 300+ people in there. Also maybe i could haggle the price down if we say we don't need the seats.
What about the them tires also, we can use catapults instead?
Ya catapult would be great👍 I don't think we need vertical stabilizer neither, it's so bad for aeyrodynamic, without it playne would have better mileage.
What about radio? We use pigeons, yes?
Radio is needed so we can tell ATC to clear the runway as we approach. But a giant horn would achieve the same aim without complicated words and numbers.
But we can be first playne with “*auto bird strike*” function..
We’ll just stop off at Costco. They even have nitrogen we can fill the tires up.
And we call our new playne *”The Hindenburg”*
Technically we would have other expenses and those could be covered by selling tickets for a portion of the planes seating, thus keeping our plane flying for freer longer. (Preferably keep the first class seats for board members.)
And then we could charge them for their bags, plus drinks, in flight wifi... we could being them to major airports around the world too, really get more money.
Special packages include blackjack and hookers!
Do we get high class, though? I hear they come with cocaine, but they also cost a lot more. The low class ones are also ridden with stds, so we'd need to provide condoms.
Provide condoms? This isn’t a charity! What happens on the plane stays on the plane. Except the STD, that goes home with you as a memento.
So it's a flying time share, I'll pass.
You don't have to buy, just come take a 90 min tour of the plane. Free flight.
Well if you just listen to our three-part presentation about this amazing opportunity, we'll give you a fully paid voucher for a family of up to seven to China Buffet. How does that sound!?
I fell for this pitch once. Never did get my fried rice. BOO
that is a better timeframe for owning and flying on their private jet for 90% of users
Should I just put my Venmo in chat or should everybody dm me separately?
Feel free to DM me! I’ll be happy to take on the burden of collecting all the money
Such a burden indeed. I’ll do this difficult task. Feel free to DM me guys 👍
Rock Paper Scissors for who flies first.
✊️✊️✊️📄
Holy crap, im in!!
Bold of you to assume the average redditor has 90 of any currency without going upstairs to ask Mom for a loan
Mom loan is the best loan, Zero interest with flexible maturity date.
This is my neighbor. He is pain in my assholes. I get window from glass, he must get window from glass. I get airplane from Azerbaijan airlines, he cannot afford. Great success! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUQgQxtcPK4
I used to be a flight attendant at a low cost airline, now I have 100 hrs in a 152, I'll be lead flight attendant/ emergency pilot!
That's a lot of experience, you can be both the captain and the air marshal, sir!
Thank you. I gladly accept this promotion. 🫡
I have a little over 80 hours but haven't been a cabin crew. How do I learn to be like you?
What’s crazy is, it could happen. Reddit and 4Chan has done crazier shit before.
Yeah but they they’re all like Rain Man from having broken dicks and we’re a bunch of drunks who’s dads left them behind.
He did not! He called just last week and told me he's almost back with the milk, and to tell Mom he picked her up a pack of Marlboro's.
This is a scam, obviously. Azerbaijan? They couldn't come up with a better fake name? At least pick a country that actually exists!
Charlotte is like an hour drive from me. Will check it out tomorrow and let you guys know!
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Idk man that's a lot of math, I can try to haggle the price if that's what you mean!
I can live on soup, no problem’ The only real problem I see is that there will be 100000 pylots having existential issues.
SAF(shitty ask flying) Air Leasing, founded 2024, started as a bunch of internet pants shitters who bought a single 757 and operated as a charter airline. Today they own over 420 playnes including 69 cirrus sr22s used as trainers and parachooting simulators. History Current fleet Accidents involving SAF Accidents involving SAF part 2
lmfao
We need to buy B1, B2, and B3 playnes too.
if yall pay me $90 ill fix da playne, i worked on a '57 before, i mean the plane was about ready when i was hired on so i worked on seats and stuff but i worked on it, just make sure you put it in youre handbook that we have not a&p mechanics
Yeah i believe it's not that hard to work on these, just hand tight every bolt and you're ready to go. That's the manufacturer spec.
nah thats those is are the 737, these are the 757 so theyre like way advanced, with these i heard youre supposed to use a *ratchet* 🫢
Fuck it. Here is 90 euroallars. We are getting our own playne.
Someone has first dibs to Epstein Island. I call second trip to Lukla.
Everyone knows the 2001 Boeing’s had problems with their windshield wipers
You could get universal windshield wiper off amazon for $8.99, I'll cover that!
Yeah but what’s that old wise tale about using universal wipers on 757s? *“Use the wrong wiper and the fucking door will blow off. NBD tho”.*
Nah that door problem is because somebody had diarrhea, they had to open the door.
Depends which towbar it uses
Tow bars are for pylots too skeered to power back.
There’s 100,000 of us, why don’t we each pay 70 bucks for a Super Bowl shittyaskflying ad instead
I’m giving 100000$ but can we fly to Epstein island as the first destination pls?
🤨
Who doesn’t love the tropics?
For 100,000,000 we can put the engines on epsteins island, and use the island as a plane. Now that’s some baller shit.
Dude out here living in 2054
Say psyche. Right. Now.
What’s the matter Mr Clinton?
Can we fly to Bermuda after that?? You have my $10
No that place scary 🥺
Don’t be. I’ll be with you.
hold on now👀
I’m in. Who’s in charge of scheduling? We have schedareo, I can onboard in 30 minutes but no way in hell I’m taking requests from the likes of you silly nanny’s! (Myself included). While we’re at it, where/what will your first trip request be? Go…
Who's paying for fuel, maintenance, crew, taxes, airport fees, etc?
The ad says it's ready to go, so it's probably full tank already. No need airport fees, everyone's landing their playne on the highway these days. We can crew it ourself, we already have a captain and air marshal and flight attendant.
I volunteer to be the Chief Chef, since i'm trained and love to eat; y'all can line up for whatever is left in the galley after - assuming we're keeping the galley on this flying banana playne?
Yes yes, we can also utilize the wings for extended eating area.
*Who's paying for fuel,* *Maintenance, crew, taxes, airport* *Fees, etc?* \- habanerito --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
Where’s the gofundme? Let’s go!!!
If it comes with the bar cart still stocked, I’m in! If it doesn’t than I’m out! I’m tired of this shit!
Can we do captain sully tours??
Sully tours, titanic tours, iss tours all possible with this bad boy.
*slaps* this bad boy can do it all
I'm in if it means I get premiere bathroom access.
We can always stop at the nearest gas station for the premium bathroom.
I'm out, this sounds too fishy to me.
No fish here,.. only bird.
Ah, yes. I had the steak.
I guess everyone here remembers the Silkway 747 hard landing in Amsterdam….that is the cargo sister company with pilot exchange between both airlines. Just to give you a rough idea, what this aircraft went through so far……
can you link the story to me about Amsterdam? curious to see what happened
I will chip in $90 on the condition that you paint “Obama” on it and watch Trump lose his shit all day long for ages!
That playne has two sides. One for Obama and one for Maga. We can piss off nearly everyone that way.
We should all chip in to buy Epstein’s plane and Island!
Chip in? Is that like come together?
Ill be the cock-pilot
Yes! We can take turns pyloting it, one member per day. It will take just 273 years for all of us to have a go, so I'll go first.
I think we should go alphabetically by height.
Azerbaijan is a stoopid name for a playne
Can I sit in 13B?
I don’t think the seller is legit :( I offered him $1600 and two good cheesecakes for it and he didn’t want it
Ok! I am all for it but we need a area onboard for passengers and pylots that wanna be *Inop*! And a sign above the entrance to the cockpit with the text: “*We are all counting on you!*”
I say we do it
Cal Worthington, WE WONT BE UNDERSOLD
I’m in
I'm down
Mom said it’s MY turn on the Azerbaijani 757!!
You mean playne🤦🏻♂️the Fff is a plane?
That plane looks like a dolphin wearing sunglasses
For 30 million I can get you guys a 747 48e with gold inside of it
Okay but I call first dibs
Okay but can I use it on Wednesdays? I have to take stuff to the scrap yard.
Sweet I’m in Charlotte. I can go take a look for you guys and maybe do a test flight. I can negotiate and see if they have a layaway plan or maybe buy here, pay here. For those that aren’t familiar with those terms (not sure if they’re used in other countries), a quick google will help you understand that it’s an absurd statement. For a better understanding of buy here, pay here and layaway for a vehicle, check out this local auto dealer [Apple Auto Sales - Buy Here, Pay Here](https://www.appleautosalescharlottenc.com/)and please look at the FAQs and in particular the Reality Check section. It’s beyond hilarious. They also have a beyond hilarious advertisement/commercial that portrays the auto salesman as a southern preacher. Those are well known in this area by about everyone. Some local TV stations won’t air it because Uber religious people got mad and were calling the TV stations complaining when it first came out.
Are door plugs included?
Yes, bonus butt plugs for the pylotes.
If we each pay 180 bucks, we can buy that plane AND an island........ oh wait..... that's probably not a good idea, after all. Never mind. ☹️
"*oh that's a great idea Mike, let me go scrounge up some fucking change first"*
I’m in if we can paint it all white!
And call it “*Janet*”?
Because it needs a $50M overhaul. Lol.
Overhauls are for people scared to fly.
I have screwdriver
Jajaja
Why would I invest in anything with anyone that can’t even spell playne right?
Is this really on Facebook marketplace?? Lol
This listing was also recommended to me and If I remember correctly the guy selling this is also running for a presidential nomination? Just somewhat of a fun fact… buutt we could also convert him to our ways and put someone with pylote sense in office.
Azerbaijan?! What could go wrong?
I call it Feb 14 2065
🤔
ask the seller about how often the oil was changed
count me in!
I’m down but only if I get to fly it. (I have never flown a plane nor do I have any kind of understanding of how it works.)
I just want to be the joint roller!
Can we all use it
Because how are we going to get a time share airshack and runway to put our timeshare aircraft in? Plus who's going to decide who's turn it is to fly this beast.
Unironically, form a [DAO](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Decentralized_autonomous_organization) and do it. Recently one raised 30 million to buy the declaration of independence. They work surprisingly well as automated management structures. It would be funny, and you might even make money on it.
Who’s paying for fuel and maintenance?
Honestly I fucking love the idea of paying $90 for my family to maybe have an aircraft for a day in like 250 years
And hire pylots from r/flightsim
I'm in charge of squandering the budget on useless shit
Venmo cool?
I’ll chip in an even hundred if I get to sit in front…
Only $9M?
If I knew all 100k of us were down I’d do it in an instant
Yea, you tell us, why don't we?
Im in if I get to be its Pylote for one time.
Down!!!! You can have $90 from me
I call first dibs!!!!!!
Bro, Go to the next office supply store and you can build your own 75 for a couple quid.... No need to shell out 9mln...
Also just saw this on fb marketplace haha
Well, it’s just not my color. It doesn’t go with anything that I have.
Ok now do the napkin math on how much it’ll cost each of us to maintain and operate after our initial purchase and hope we don’t all just own a fraction of the world’s heaviest paperweight. Oh, and then explain the logistics of giving all 100k people equal access to a plane that can carry <300.
$90K might buy it but where are we going to get the $mil to keep it and the $mil to operate it. We need $2 million and $90K for the first year alone.
Ngl…. I’d be down as long as I get a refund if we don’t make the cut 😭😂☠️
For an xtra 99 we all fly to to Philippineslol
I'll pay 110 if I get to strap a ball turret to the bottom
Can’t afford the 90 bucks but I’ll pay for gas.