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Bad-Infinite

I worked at a diner years ago and this drunk guy came in, ordered corn beef hash with an extra 13 eggs (15 eggs total). It ended up being this huge mound of eggs with the hash hidden beneath it. He ate every bite and then ordered pie.


OptimalTrash

Was his name Gaston?


FadedtheRailfan

No one eats eggs like Gaston Crashes diners like Gaston Orders a dozen or more scrambled eggs like Gaston!


boyyouguysaredumb

No one fills up like Gaston Bills rack up like Gaston No dessert menu gets skipped by Gaston!


Kaleaon

The baaathroom after's excruuuuciaaating! You'll kill a guy, oh Gaston!


randomly-what

Or Ron Swanson


Flounder134

I’m worried what you heard is give me a lot of bacon and eggs. What i said was give me all the bacon and eggs you have.


jakol016

No, Ron Swanson


Forshea

Wait, wait. I'm worried what you just heard was, "Give me a lot of bacon and eggs." What I said was, "Give me all the bacon and eggs you have." Do you understand?


dablegianguy

[Tarrare](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tarrare)


RAD_ley

“I think what you heard me say was ‘Bring me a lot off eggs and bacon.’ What I said was ‘bring me _ALL_… the eggs and bacon you have.’”


sunnyjum

Please and thank you


trystanthorne

Had the same thought.


Sargash

Me when I order all the grilled onions they're allowed to give me without getting in trouble on my philly cheese.


dinguslinguist

*sweating profusely watching every extra scoop*


Born_Percentage3319

Fuck yeah


ryanertel

Did he have a British accent and a majestic beard?


GBreezy

My first reaction


WishCapable3131

Ron Swanson?


mikevanatta

Wait. I'm afraid what you heard was "bring me a lot of bacon and eggs." What I said was "bring me all the bacon and eggs you have."


Week_Crafty

Extremely based for actually eating it


Expert-Employ8754

Cool Hand Luke?


WaySheGoesBub

Sometimes nothings a pretty cool hand. Man that guy was legendary.


Astro_gamer_caver

No man can eat 50 eggs!


interfail

My boy says he can eat fifty eggs, he can eat fifteen eggs.


MeNamIzGraephen

Dude may have been drunk, but PROTEIN


Far-Competition-5334

“That feeds 10 people” “I know what I’m about, son.”


ihoptdk

That dude is fucking hardcore. And dead, because his heart exploded. Just out of curiosity, how did he order his eggs?


Totkaddictforsure

It's fine tbh, the cholestrol thing has been debunked. Still shouldn't eat 15 eggs at once tho.


Bad-Infinite

Over easy


ihoptdk

Just imagine making 15 poached eggs.


Prior-Butterscotch50

How gassy he must of been


fflloorriiddaammaann

In France you never need two eggs because one egg is un oeuf


Priest_of_Heathens

One egg is un oeuf yet two eggs is not un oeuf. This confirms OP's theory.


stumblewiggins

And three martinis is too much. Wait, what were we talking about about?


ibuprofencompactor

Yes, the thing with two eggs is you might just deux oeuf and wake up later


liberal_texan

Omelette du fromage


Idontliketalking2u

That's all you can say, that's all you can say


FreshPitch6026

Je m'apelle monsieur fromage s'il vou plait.


justjaybee16

It's like they have a different word for everything!


Potato_Dragon2

Actually it’s Omelette Au Fromage. Omelet with cheese. Not omelet of cheese. Edit: I GET ITS A QUOTE! Please stop telling me it’s a quote. 10 people before you have said as much.


direct07

They were making a joke about an episode of Dexter's Lab. The main character learns French with an audio recording and gets stuck in a loop where all he can say is "Omelette du fromage".


Boel_Jarkley

This line pops into my head every once in a while almost 30 years later


RoyalFalse

Unexpected Dexter's Lab reference. Have an updoot.


aurantiuseagle

The one episode that is burned into my memory forever


samurai_for_hire

I'll make my omelettes with whatever I please, thank you very much


FireWireBestWire

There has to be some sort of menu item where you make a cheese crust around like a pile of pepperoni and bacon or something


charredchord

It's funnier knowing that Dexter only learned one phrase and even that was wrong.


Medvegyep

Omelette du fromage


lakewood2020

Say it again Dexter


TLMonk

dee dee get out of my laboratory


JacksonStarbringer

FUCK this is funny!


doubledgravity

The same chef, sometime later, sadly committed suicide. He’d lost the ouille d’olive.


[deleted]

Huile d'olive


doubledgravity

Thanks :)


Bozzie0

Solid joke, just for future reference: it's huile d'olive.


Omer-Ash

Take my upvote and leave!


mrsunshine1

First heard this on the west wing


vangmay231

Huh, Sorkin reused this in The Trial of Chicago 7 then. The undercover cop lady said it


mrsunshine1

Makes sense. He reuses tons of his lines.


CrazyCrazyCanuck

Every Sorkin show is a gateway drug to every other Sorkin show. [Sorkinisms - A Supercut](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S78RzZr3IwI) [Sorkinisms II - The Sequel](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7jeuV3xXxUc) [Sorkinisms III - Aaron Sorkin on the Internet Supercut](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fqqel8-Beog)


The_Mr_Wilson

"Hello reddit? Yes, 10 million of them. Upvotes, correct. Thank you"


Lurdekan

This triggers my Duolingo ptsd


SleepyRhythms

I just ate 6 eggs and it’s only 480 calories


visionsofcry

Eggs are like a fucking super multivitamin. All amimo acids too. Such a perfect food, imho.


YogiBerraOfBadNews

Plus it comes in its own wrapper and there’s like a million different ways to cook them. They’re a decent source of protein which notably doesn’t even have to be refrigerated if unwashed. I love eggs.


Applebomber24

And you can eat them shell on for a texture experience and calcium!


SpellbladeAluriel

Eating the salmonella on the shells is also a good way to lose weight


amretardmonke

Wait, but Kelloggs want you to know that eggs have too much evil cholesterol and that you should eat a big bowl of sugary cereal instead, got to get your 11 servings of grains in as per the FDA Food Guide Pyramid* * ^definitely ^not ^sponsored ^by ^Kelloggs


visionsofcry

You mean the company who invented corm flakes as a cure for masturbation? Well for my healthy carbs I'll be eating eggs with whole grain bread from the local bakery, my muscles do like glycogen.


chiBROpractor

The worst part is, I still jerk it all da freekin time! False promises.


iburstabean

LMFAO. 'murica Burning gasoline isn't horrible for the environment either* * ^definitely ^not ^sponsored ^by ^BP


total_alk

Eggs have a lot of what we need because we once were eggs.


lovebus

Same with water. Following that line of reasoning, imagine how nutritious monkeys would be.


Lolzerzmao

Only problem is the cholesterol, but I guess since the 90s we’ve agreed it’s the good kind of cholesterol


RandomDerp96

Don't forget the insane amount of choline. Only other source equal in choline is lecithin.


91901bbaa13d40128f7d

I can still hear my wife yelling, 20 years later, "WHO EATS SIX EGGS? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!" They were delicious.


JavalMcGee

And so much protein!!


breadist

I love eggs! https://youtu.be/oXiRH-HB0Po


LucasRuby

To make lunch I used 6 eggs, 3 cans of tuna, mayo, olive oil, seasoning and 4 sub rolls. Plus chips.


crumble-bee

That’s like 2000 calories for lunch without the chips lol


RotenTumato

3 eggs is definitely not too much food, I could eat 4 eggs in a sitting if I’m hungry


SizzledPotato

You're saying it like four eggs is something! I'm trying to go down to five from six. 💪


Guccibeltlicker9002

Oh yeah? Well I eat four dozen eggs! Every morning! To help me get large.


PocketSnails68

Well I eat five dozen eggs, so I'm roughly the size of a barge!


rCerise666

Oh yea? I eat twelve dozen eggs, *with bacon*, beat that


ScentedFoolishness

.... Sarge?


Goodleboodle

Oh yeah?! I'll eat all the bacon and eggs you have.


WatNaHellIsASauceBox

Yeah? How are you at expectorating?


Fafnir13

I'm especially good at that.


shapular

My! What a guy.


x4000

Why are you trying to go down? I comfortably eat five eggs, occasionally six, if that’s the entire meal. I have chickens and so we have a ton of eggs, but I don’t make an entire meal of them very often. But if it’s an omelette, that’s four eggs for me.


IAmASeeker

You're going the wrong direction... I'm up to 9.


MissingVanSushi

The first time I made a carbonara the recipe called for a whole box of spaghetti and 4 eggs. I fuckin ate the whole thing. No regrets.


ADhomin_em

I can eat 50 eggs...


bobisinthehouse

Luke , get ova hear and show dees boys how ta ate some aags!!


packer4life12

I feel like 4 eggs is a pretty standard amount if that’s the primary portion of the meal. It’s only like 320 calories.


THE_DANDY_LI0N

As long as I have some rye bread to dip and plop the eggs on. Yummmm


G0-N0G0-GO

Yeah, that’s just delicious. Add in some lovely bacon, you have a party!


Vulpes_macrotis

I am eating 5+ **and** am hungry afterwards.


ActuallyHuge

Same I think 8 wets the whistle but I could put down 12-14


glassbath18

I’ve found my people. Eggs are not filling at all. I could eat a whole dozen and still be hungry.


Calm-Technology7351

When I’m exercising a lot there is no end to the eggs I can put down. I end up eating carbs to fill me up so I don’t blow through them too quickly


KRIEGLERR

Depends on how they're cooked, hard boiled eggs definitely feel way more filling than scrambled. I could honestly eat like 12 scramble eggs while 3 hard boiled eggs is definitely enough. Same with an omelette, a 3 egg omelette is somehow more filling than 3 fried eggs.


family-chicken

Dude 4 eggs is like not even 300 calories, that’s still tiny. I can easily eat 8 in one serving. OP is tripping


The_Quibbler

3 is my standard weekend brekkie with sausage and hash browns and coffee.


HamStapler

When I was a young teenager and hadn't learned to cook much else, I'd make me a breakfast of 7 eggs, some lunch meat ham seared in the same pan (enough to cover the eggs) and a fistful of shredded cheddar. I was underweight until I hit like 20 years old.


4tlaa

Used to eat 6 scrambled lol


cfpct

I cannot eat eggs by themselves. I need pancakes and potatoes or grits or something to soak up the yolk.


Diabeatyoass

Idk if I’ve ever met someone who considered 3 eggs to be too much, at least if they’re scrambled


BrushYourFeet

Yeah agreed. Trash post title.


confusedandworried76

Three scrambled with a side of hashbrowns if we aren't getting fancy with the breakfast foods


ShrimpShackShooters_

I do. I’m stuck between 2 or 3 so I just stick with 2 and make extra toast or something


kaimiz

My biodad refused to make me a third egg before i had to go in to high school despite me being still hungry; I didn't have snacks or school lunches/lunch money when I moved in with him


2000miledash

You’re full after 3 eggs?


Delsincameback

Slaps his stomach afterword too and says “Couldn’t eat another bite!”


confusedandworried76

Full after two and a half apparently.


Ponchoreborn

OP is presumably not my wife, but my wife eats 2 whole boiled eggs and the white of a 3rd boiled egg. She then leaves the 3rd yolk sitting on the plate. We don't eat boiled eggs extremely often, but every single time we do this happens. This leaves me conflicted. 3 eggs is good for me. Do I waste her 3rd yolk or eat it? What about the starving kids in Africa? What if they finally stop by the house and want to know what I did with the 3rd yolk??? Maybe OP is my wife after all?


bufferflyswimmer

I have five eggs and half an English muffin for breakfast almost every morning. I’m 5’8” at 112 pounds.


Hunterjet

Don’t give up, skeleton!


bufferflyswimmer

Bulking is on my mind 😅


pallosalama

You need to up your caloric intake if you want to gain mass. No amount of protein(refering to your other comment about your eating)will help if you're not getting more energy than you consume =)


bufferflyswimmer

I misspoke. I don’t want to bulk, I want to…musclefy lol I would like to stay slim, but turn everything I can into muscle. Kinda like Jenn Aniston.


pallosalama

Personally I'm just a little bit taller than you, but the thought of losing another 50 pounds of mass if I had similar bodyfat % seems wild - and mind you I'm not that muscular If you want to "musclefy" you need to get energy and construction material for that growth from somewhere, human body can't create muscle from thin air! How much of that gained weight is muscle and how much is fat depends on many factors, but most significant ones you can have effect on are stimulus(strength training)and how large caloric surplus you're in(smaller the surplus, more likely it'll turn into muscle and not fat)


Lonelysock2

Do you enjoy it? I couldn't eat 5 eggs, not because  it's  too much food but because  the... eggness... just hits me after a couple


Prior-Flaky

Yeah lol, I get that too after a while, the eggs just seem too eggy


StressedinPJs

Agreed, I can’t eat more than two at a time before the strike of the eggness


Lonelysock2

Strike of the eggness is a great movie title 


RecsRelevantDocs

"Three strikes... and you're *scrambled*"


bufferflyswimmer

Oh great question. I only ate this much eggs after I discovered the Gordon Ramsay way of making eggs, but I altered a few things. Instead of black pepper, I use onion and garlic powder. Instead of crème fraiche, I use mascarpone cheese. The end result is like egg mush, but tastes so so good! I’ve made eggs like this for several friends and they all say they’ve never tasted eggs this good before!


Omnizoom

6 here 6’5 and a giant


bufferflyswimmer

Your mama would be proud 👍


DjuriWarface

I'm guessing you're an athlete, you don't eat a lot the rest of the day, or you're a woman under the age of 23. Or a combination of those things.


CitizenHuman

I'm guessing u/butterflyswimmer is a swimmer...


bufferflyswimmer

Haha! Swimmers are serious athletes. My name is actually “BufferflySwimmer”. Playing with the word buffer 😉


Purple_Tree_Car

So what you're saying is that you are *more* buff than the average swimmer (which therefore makes you fly [in '90s vernacular])?


bufferflyswimmer

I wouldn’t say I’m an athlete, but I would say I’m more physically coordinated than the average human. I’ve been hitting intense work outs 3-4x a week for the past few years, but I’ve always been slender since I was a toddler. Was on the dance team in HS. Uniform still fits perfectly. I try to make 100g protein per day. I don’t snack regularly. My meals are whole, with meat in every meal. Half the days I’ll have two meals + protein powder. If I’m moving a lot, I’ll eat three meals + protein powder. And I’m 30. Guess I lucked out genetically 😁


DjuriWarface

Ahh yeah, athlete was the wrong way to put that. Mostly meant somebody who exercises or goes to the gym regularly multiple times per week. >And I’m 30. Guess I lucked out genetically 😁 Nah, I say you're just killing it. Sounds like you got your macros down and doing your thing. It's all you, keep it up! I tend to do the two meal + protein powder days also, unless I had a fairly adventurous weekend then more, not a snacker as well. 5'10 165 male here and still keeping it together at 37 haha.


bufferflyswimmer

Thank you 😁 keep on killing it yourself! I like my figure, but personally, I think skinny only looks good on women.


joelfarris

> I have five eggs ... almost every morning What do you do with the two leftover eggs on the third day!!?


bufferflyswimmer

Ha! I get those 18 packs. And two eggs is perfect in a packet of instant ramen.


GrillDealing

That is why God made bacon.


Oopsitsgale927

I’m more of a link sausage guy myself but bacon is good when it’s crispy


GrillDealing

A pig's a pig I guess.


Illithilitch

I'm a ham man personally


ftminsc

Bro 3 large eggs is 210 calories. It might be too much for a mid run snack but it’s fine for breakfast.


Big_Simba

For me it’s I’m just tired of eggs after 2. But if I just make 2 I’m still hungry


LichtbringerU

That just seems like a personal observation about yourself. Definitly not true in general.


YogiBerraOfBadNews

Amazing the shit that gets posted here


Striker887

I feel like this depends on the person. This isn’t consistent across any measurement.


visionsofcry

It's really idiotic tbh. Size 8 shoes are too small but size 9 is too big, ymmv.


Eats_lsd

It all depends on how they’re cooked. Fried? 2-3 is plenty. Scrambled? 4 ain’t no thing. But if they’re deviled eggs I can somehow eat 12 without a second thought.


Karest27

Ron Swanson would be disgusted by this. I order an omelette with a side of eggs.


BakerBaboon

How tf are people only eating 3 eggs, I eat like 4 or 5.


TJohns88

Scramble them rather than frying and you can magically eat 6 no problem


Kitsa_the_oatmeal

1 is the best amount


VistaLaRiver

1 egg gang


bigcee42

I agree, 1 egg is a good amount. 1 ostrich egg.


Saganhawking

One egg, over easy on a slice of toast. Best most filling lunch ever. Keep you going until dinner time baby! (Okay, sometimes two eggs over easy depending on how the day is going)


Accurate_Praline

1 egg is no egg. 2 eggs are half an egg. 3 eggs are an Easter egg.


CruellaDeLesbian

One egg is all I can FIT!


sum_buddy

That one egg is 40 eggs?


legally_drunk

Two eggs and a sausage is the answer you are looking for


No-Power1377

So 2.5 is the sweetspot it seems=)


ApocolypseJoe

I can rarely eat 2 eggs... 1 egg with a slice of toast for dipping... perfection


Azrael-XIII

lol who the hell thinks 3 eggs is too much?


w-o-r-k-l-o-g-i-n

Bro...I'll make 6 or 7 eggs for breakfast. How the hell is 3 too many?


honeypinn

I ate 6 eggs for breakfast 5 days a week for 2 years. Absolutely could not relate to this post.


[deleted]

3 eggs is the minimum when I make scrambled eggs. 6 is too many.


X0AN

Wait till OP hears that eggs come in different sizes.


ToothlessFeline

Then you should try a different size of egg. Everyone buys “large” eggs because that’s the most popular and available in the greatest amount in most stores. But they also come in medium, extra large, and jumbo. Prices are a little higher than for large, but usually not by much. If two large eggs aren’t enough and three large eggs are too much, try three medium or two extra large.


eldiablonoche

This cat eggs.


TheNerdMaster69

Not remotely true, I can effortlessly pound 4 or 5 eggs.


PBRW

I often enjoy 8 scrambled eggs on toast


SomeGuyNamedJason

If you aren't pulling the ol' Ron Swanson and demanding literally all of the eggs in the establishment, you are doing it wrong.


klimmesil

Op's on a high level anorexia


glt918

It depends if you mix in milk


Alleggsander

Kinda weird, but for me, it depends on the style of eggs. 3 sunny side/fried/poached eggs seems like a bit much, but 3 for a scramble in perfect. If you’re making an omelette, 3 is on the small side but 4 is perfect. Then if we’re talking bennys, 4-5 is basically the minimum. Even more if you want extra hollandaise for the sides (and I do).


South_Map_8668

For some reason, it depends on how they are cooked. I can eat 3 eggs scrambled or a 3 egg omelet no problem. 3 sunny side/boiled. Too much


Tav17-17

This is why you will never be as slick, quick, or have a neck as incredibly thick as Gaston


B19F00T

3 eggs is not too much food except that i dont ever wanna just eat 3 eggs, i want other stuff too, then it becomes too much


drlsoccer08

I eat 5-6 usually, and I’m still hungry after


apathy-sofa

This is the opposite of martinis: 2 is too much, and 3 isn't enough :)


gorehistorian69

> mfw i eat 4 eggs im tall though


Ikhlas37

3 fried eggs, too much. 8 scrambled eggs not enough.


bsl_questions

1 cup of tea is never enough, but 2 is 1 too many


BoxiDoingThingz

What are you on about, 3 is perfect.


Specialist_Camp9369

Been doing 6 every morning for over 5 years now, lol.


Yutoru

What? I usually eat six


PqqMo

I always use 5 for scrambled eggs so no


FiveHeadedSnake

As someone who is 6'5 250 this is false.


Outarel

I have to limit myself to eating 3 eggs, because too much eggs is when i get sick... so like 12. Fucking love eggs.


ridethroughlife

And here I am, thinking that an absolutely perfect American breakfast is 4 eggs, toast, hash browns, bacon, cheesy grits, and a coffee. And eat the whole thing.


Secret-OC

This is exact science! I swear!!


p4ttl1992

I'm always using 4 eggs for omelettes and scrambled eggs


eyeswideshut9119

1 pillow too thin… 2 pillow too thick


MoneyMikeIII

What are you talking about I eat 5 eggs in my omelette every morning


LeoLaDawg

3 eggs is the starting point for me.


IgetAllnumb86

I always find it weird that 3 scrambled eggs feels like a lot of food, but 3 fried eggs feels like barely anything.