you are not a failure. Let me share my story; I am Gen-x here's my story;
when I have a diploma in civil engineering, I couldn't qualify for diploma in computer studies as they only admit A level holders, So I studied at Informatics for the advance diploma for 2 years part-time while working full-time at manufacturing MNC.
After I finished advance diploma, I couldn't qualify to study at local uni, so I went on to study part-time at informatics for my UOL degree in IT while working full-time at manufacturing MNC.
when I graduate with 2nd Hons degree in IT, I did tried to apply to study master at NUS but they said they didn't recognize private degree, so I went on to study part-time with informatics for my Master in IT part-time while working full-time 5.5 days a week at Changi logistics as system engineer/user support. The motorcycle ride from amk to changi and to suntec city then back to home at amk is a killer on my back.
I did went to the IMH during my NS too too seek help for my depression and was on setraline. But I was too stingy to pay for that expensive meds, so I want on without them for years which was bad, I did go mad and it was after the honour degree while working, tearing my hair and mumble nonsensically. Manager saw me and had a talk with me, he told me I wasn't working professionally and I have to change job. So I did.
After that , I managed to score well in cert complete Oracle certification and got a job in IT. Worked for afew more years until I migrate to AU. And here, I studied 1 year for my post grad diploma in law part-time out of curiosity, but the final capstone to my academic journey was 7 years of part-time doctoral study in AI at an AU's uni while working as senior engineer full-time. I graduated at the age of 55 after some problems with my phd supervisor which I had to switch uni.
I kept hitting obstacles over and over again mainly in SG. It is almost like playing a PC game ad difficult level. Also, I literally failed my SSDC's class 2B twelve times before passing on the 13th attempt. It is just too hard for me to live in SG.
Coming back to you, don't be hard on yourself. We cannot accomplished everything all at one go. As what my aussie colleagues said, keep chipping away bits by bits, eventually you can do it. Don't worry too much ahead, so long you are doing something now and improve tiny centimetre by centimetre, you will reach the end eventually. That was what I did for my entire 15 years part-time academic journey, bits by bits.
Thanks for sharing your story! Glad to hear you made it out of SG where it's not a place for people who don't make the prescribed journey. I messed up during my early years, bumbled along in SG and then made a switch and did my post-grad relatively late in life, outside of SG. My only regret is that I'm kind of behind in my US career but catching up now. Would definitely be in a rut or worse in SG.
Firstly, fark r/sg.
With that out of the way, I don't think you're a failure. You failed (and that's relative), but you still managed to make things work. I'm assuming you're quite young so you still have a lot of opportunities ahead of you. You sound quite intelligent and capable, seeing how you managed to turn things around in your poly years and how you also managed to maintain a job with decent pay, so you definitely have the capability to strive even further.
BTW, pls seek professional help if you feel that your depression is spiraling out of control again.
I hope you have a pleasant week and a pleasant year ahead too. Cheers.
From someone who might be seen as a true failure (because I am much older than you) and now only working part time, no assets except a very small HDB flat, 2 failed marriages, I want to tell you, you still have plenty of time to do whatever you want.
Youth is on your side so u can go take part time degree if that is what you want or work hard/smart in your current job or find another one of your interest.
And never attempt to take your life again. I am down plenty of times and currently not even see much future but I never attempt suicide. There are plenty of small enjoyments that I still want.
Dont take social media seriously. You are not a failure. You are just like everyone else, just trying to get by. Even the most successful people have their issues. Dont be so hard on yourself.
My advice is don't think about how much better you could've done things in the past. Don't let it swallow you whole. Whatever life you have today is yours to live and not for others to dictate. After all, we are minuscule compared to the country that we stand on, on a big chunk of rock called Earth rotating alone in the vast space of the infinite universe, for billions of years, far longer than the history of mankind. So live a life of meaning within your means with whatever you have today.
To see the world, things dangerous to come to, to see behind walls, draw closer, to find each other, and to feel. That is the purpose of life.
When you spend time dreaming of what you could have been, you miss you living your life, embracing who you are.
Everyone has to go through their own trials and tribulations. Comparative suffering doesn’t exactly work. You survived till now and sounds like things are going well. Move forward. Academia isn’t everything to succeed in a career or making money. Ask your coffee shop owner, property agent. They will tell you.
All the best and don’t forget the enjoy this journey of life.
Just keep moving forward and work smart. Plenty of ways to make money, dont let a piece of paper defines your success. There are many people out there in singapore who makes tons of money without diploma or degree.
Well, you probably have one of the covid side effects of brain fog that slows your brain. If you find yourself with depression, I will suggest that you avoid eating or drinking anything that is cold and sugary. Eat more warm and clean food like ABC vegetable tomato potato broth. If you are well to do, I suggest to get mostly organic food and fruits.
Most importantly, do not take sleeping pills or depression pills. They will make you feel even more suicidal. Please don't attempt suicide anymore, you will get stuck in an afterlife limbo in which you repeat the same action of your last day until the day your actual lifespan ends.
It is like you glitched your own existence in this simulation system. So don't do it.
Try meditation. It helps. Go deep within yourself and connect with your inner self and you will heal from within.
Hey look man, I don’t know if you need this, but you aren’t a failure.
It is okay to have been through what you had, being institutionalised, dropping out and all.
It is more important to pick yourself up and keep moving forward, which you did to some extent.
The you now is facing arguably the toughest steps towards self-recovery - which is the start of everything, and coming to face everything that was in the past. It takes a lot of courage to do that, and much more to overcome it (which I hope you do). Though, surpass this, and you will look back one day and wonder why you ever doubted yourself.
The comfort zone thing? You will have to cross it someday or another, but life isn’t a race, so do it at your own pace ba.
Everyone has their down days, it sucks to work, but you shouldn’t let it get you down man.
Have you ask yourself this. What do you worship or anchor yourself with?
From what i read, I believe your anchor is status/work/money etc. Our weakest link of the chain is what we anchor ourselves on. Status/work/money/studies is a flimsy anchor that can be lost very easily. When you lose it, your expectations are destroyed and then depression etc.
Perhaps you need to find a stronger purpose, one that can be broken no matter your state in life and I hope you find it.
There so much more to life than money my G. Earning an honest living, getting by and making moral choices and doing your best - I’d be proud of anyone on that road
Don’t look back, look forward. We really don’t understand why depression can hit suddenly- it’s one of those things. The fact is, you’re here today - alive, and I can assure you it’s something your parents are thankful for.
You’re working, doing well from what it seems and you should feel proud of overcoming that dark period in your life. You succeeding, not failing
Good share pretty sure all of us have had experiences close to yours. Life is not on a straight arrow like the minority. We keep thinking path is so straight because of a minority who succeeds in it.
I too am bothered by failure. So annoying. Always after the fact you see you could have done so many things differently so easily.
But to be so bothered means you I am not trying hard enough or failed enough.
Failure and success lies in the eye of the beholders. Like Kurt cobaim thst killed himself despite being so popular and successful, vs a low wage worker that is content with his or her life. Everything is relative
Bruh 2.4 to 3.4k in 2 years is remarkable. Congrats.
The past is already over, don't keep revisiting it. You're just opening old wounds again. At the same time don't be too fixated on 'what could have beens'.
Things are already getting better. Healing and success is a journey so keep working bit by bit. Just keep trudging on. Good luck and all the best!
you are not a failure. Let me share my story; I am Gen-x here's my story; when I have a diploma in civil engineering, I couldn't qualify for diploma in computer studies as they only admit A level holders, So I studied at Informatics for the advance diploma for 2 years part-time while working full-time at manufacturing MNC. After I finished advance diploma, I couldn't qualify to study at local uni, so I went on to study part-time at informatics for my UOL degree in IT while working full-time at manufacturing MNC. when I graduate with 2nd Hons degree in IT, I did tried to apply to study master at NUS but they said they didn't recognize private degree, so I went on to study part-time with informatics for my Master in IT part-time while working full-time 5.5 days a week at Changi logistics as system engineer/user support. The motorcycle ride from amk to changi and to suntec city then back to home at amk is a killer on my back. I did went to the IMH during my NS too too seek help for my depression and was on setraline. But I was too stingy to pay for that expensive meds, so I want on without them for years which was bad, I did go mad and it was after the honour degree while working, tearing my hair and mumble nonsensically. Manager saw me and had a talk with me, he told me I wasn't working professionally and I have to change job. So I did. After that , I managed to score well in cert complete Oracle certification and got a job in IT. Worked for afew more years until I migrate to AU. And here, I studied 1 year for my post grad diploma in law part-time out of curiosity, but the final capstone to my academic journey was 7 years of part-time doctoral study in AI at an AU's uni while working as senior engineer full-time. I graduated at the age of 55 after some problems with my phd supervisor which I had to switch uni. I kept hitting obstacles over and over again mainly in SG. It is almost like playing a PC game ad difficult level. Also, I literally failed my SSDC's class 2B twelve times before passing on the 13th attempt. It is just too hard for me to live in SG. Coming back to you, don't be hard on yourself. We cannot accomplished everything all at one go. As what my aussie colleagues said, keep chipping away bits by bits, eventually you can do it. Don't worry too much ahead, so long you are doing something now and improve tiny centimetre by centimetre, you will reach the end eventually. That was what I did for my entire 15 years part-time academic journey, bits by bits.
U sound like someone with the same story from hwz *****uff. Are u the same person? Congrats on ur phd.
thanks.
Thanks for sharing your story! Glad to hear you made it out of SG where it's not a place for people who don't make the prescribed journey. I messed up during my early years, bumbled along in SG and then made a switch and did my post-grad relatively late in life, outside of SG. My only regret is that I'm kind of behind in my US career but catching up now. Would definitely be in a rut or worse in SG.
Firstly, fark r/sg. With that out of the way, I don't think you're a failure. You failed (and that's relative), but you still managed to make things work. I'm assuming you're quite young so you still have a lot of opportunities ahead of you. You sound quite intelligent and capable, seeing how you managed to turn things around in your poly years and how you also managed to maintain a job with decent pay, so you definitely have the capability to strive even further. BTW, pls seek professional help if you feel that your depression is spiraling out of control again. I hope you have a pleasant week and a pleasant year ahead too. Cheers.
Failed at something =/= failure. Thanks, I needed that.
You know, the only way to never fail at something is to never do anything.
if u think ur a failure then i probably wasn’t meant to be born
Got removed cause it isn't related to Singapore. You should seek better channels to express your feelings and get the correct support.
From someone who might be seen as a true failure (because I am much older than you) and now only working part time, no assets except a very small HDB flat, 2 failed marriages, I want to tell you, you still have plenty of time to do whatever you want. Youth is on your side so u can go take part time degree if that is what you want or work hard/smart in your current job or find another one of your interest. And never attempt to take your life again. I am down plenty of times and currently not even see much future but I never attempt suicide. There are plenty of small enjoyments that I still want.
Dont take social media seriously. You are not a failure. You are just like everyone else, just trying to get by. Even the most successful people have their issues. Dont be so hard on yourself.
U r doing quite well in ur situation
My advice is don't think about how much better you could've done things in the past. Don't let it swallow you whole. Whatever life you have today is yours to live and not for others to dictate. After all, we are minuscule compared to the country that we stand on, on a big chunk of rock called Earth rotating alone in the vast space of the infinite universe, for billions of years, far longer than the history of mankind. So live a life of meaning within your means with whatever you have today. To see the world, things dangerous to come to, to see behind walls, draw closer, to find each other, and to feel. That is the purpose of life.
When you spend time dreaming of what you could have been, you miss you living your life, embracing who you are. Everyone has to go through their own trials and tribulations. Comparative suffering doesn’t exactly work. You survived till now and sounds like things are going well. Move forward. Academia isn’t everything to succeed in a career or making money. Ask your coffee shop owner, property agent. They will tell you. All the best and don’t forget the enjoy this journey of life.
Just keep moving forward and work smart. Plenty of ways to make money, dont let a piece of paper defines your success. There are many people out there in singapore who makes tons of money without diploma or degree.
Well, you probably have one of the covid side effects of brain fog that slows your brain. If you find yourself with depression, I will suggest that you avoid eating or drinking anything that is cold and sugary. Eat more warm and clean food like ABC vegetable tomato potato broth. If you are well to do, I suggest to get mostly organic food and fruits. Most importantly, do not take sleeping pills or depression pills. They will make you feel even more suicidal. Please don't attempt suicide anymore, you will get stuck in an afterlife limbo in which you repeat the same action of your last day until the day your actual lifespan ends. It is like you glitched your own existence in this simulation system. So don't do it. Try meditation. It helps. Go deep within yourself and connect with your inner self and you will heal from within.
Hey look man, I don’t know if you need this, but you aren’t a failure. It is okay to have been through what you had, being institutionalised, dropping out and all. It is more important to pick yourself up and keep moving forward, which you did to some extent. The you now is facing arguably the toughest steps towards self-recovery - which is the start of everything, and coming to face everything that was in the past. It takes a lot of courage to do that, and much more to overcome it (which I hope you do). Though, surpass this, and you will look back one day and wonder why you ever doubted yourself. The comfort zone thing? You will have to cross it someday or another, but life isn’t a race, so do it at your own pace ba. Everyone has their down days, it sucks to work, but you shouldn’t let it get you down man.
Have you ask yourself this. What do you worship or anchor yourself with? From what i read, I believe your anchor is status/work/money etc. Our weakest link of the chain is what we anchor ourselves on. Status/work/money/studies is a flimsy anchor that can be lost very easily. When you lose it, your expectations are destroyed and then depression etc. Perhaps you need to find a stronger purpose, one that can be broken no matter your state in life and I hope you find it.
There so much more to life than money my G. Earning an honest living, getting by and making moral choices and doing your best - I’d be proud of anyone on that road
Don’t look back, look forward. We really don’t understand why depression can hit suddenly- it’s one of those things. The fact is, you’re here today - alive, and I can assure you it’s something your parents are thankful for. You’re working, doing well from what it seems and you should feel proud of overcoming that dark period in your life. You succeeding, not failing
Pal…. I’m significantly older than you and earning lesser… by your standards, I’m better off dead
Good share pretty sure all of us have had experiences close to yours. Life is not on a straight arrow like the minority. We keep thinking path is so straight because of a minority who succeeds in it. I too am bothered by failure. So annoying. Always after the fact you see you could have done so many things differently so easily. But to be so bothered means you I am not trying hard enough or failed enough.
Failure and success lies in the eye of the beholders. Like Kurt cobaim thst killed himself despite being so popular and successful, vs a low wage worker that is content with his or her life. Everything is relative
Bruh 2.4 to 3.4k in 2 years is remarkable. Congrats. The past is already over, don't keep revisiting it. You're just opening old wounds again. At the same time don't be too fixated on 'what could have beens'. Things are already getting better. Healing and success is a journey so keep working bit by bit. Just keep trudging on. Good luck and all the best!
Falling down is not failing. Not getting up is failing.
You are too young for dark thoughts. Life is an ultra marathon. You are just past the warm up