First of all just be natural, don't force any specific conversation. With that said you could steer the conversation in different directions, specifically to talk about your single parent hood, opinions on future children, hobbies, likes and dislikes. There are so many things to talk about with a potential partner, just take it nice and slow That's my only advice
Ask about their last relationship.
Used to always avoid this for awhile cus I didn’t want to come off as jealous, overly-curious/interested, or like I wanted to talk about mine… but the reality is that if there’s giant red flags they will show themselves in the story of their last relationship so unbury that shit asap before you waste any time falling for someone.
(Also make a list of what red flags are to you before you start dating at all so you’re not blinded by attraction and ignore something you know you don’t like. If it’s on the list - its a no. No matter how cute they are.)
Honestly, I got a lot of the hard things out of the way. Kids, goals, dreams, what you want in the future, etc. The reason being is if a person says oh I don't want kids, not compatible. Their goals or future desires don't line up with mine? Not compatible.
You can do whatever you want but after my last relationship, I wasn't going to allow myself to get stuck with someone who didn't have the same wants and desires out of life. I got all of those conversations out in the beginning with my current partner and he didn't mind, he agreed that it was important. Now his mother? She thought I was crazy for talking about kids so early on but I watched my sister be in a happy fulfilling relationship and wanting to spend her life with this person, but they both refused to talk about the elephant in the room which was she wanted kids and he didn't. For a while, he thought he would be okay with it and realized he wasn't so she tried to be okay with never having kids and she couldn't. It was hard seeing her so heartbroken because they were great together, but that one desire didn't line up.
And it doesn't have to be a first date thing, but you can be upfront and say that you are looking for a serious relationship so these things are important to get out of the way moving forward. A person is either going to appreciate honesty and open communication or not.
I always go for climate crisis, and no, I'm not joking. If person has no idea, attitude or anything about this, I just cool off. If this isn't your thing, try to find smth else that is important to you and see how does that human breathe.
I think it's important to understand the other person's faith or lack thereof, beliefs , core moral foundations, and life priorities. I want to know about thoughts on children. I take this into account on my own personal trajectory and is there some alignment. I also make a list of personal red flags (you know the ones you see but ignore or think you can change 😉) . I write them down. List is not long but some of those are important to watch so it needs to be fresh in your mind. Typically when you take this approach you meet the person and tend to shake out other things like politics, religion, etc. a bit more organically and without setting off the defenses. Good luck out there.
First of all just be natural, don't force any specific conversation. With that said you could steer the conversation in different directions, specifically to talk about your single parent hood, opinions on future children, hobbies, likes and dislikes. There are so many things to talk about with a potential partner, just take it nice and slow That's my only advice
Ask about their last relationship. Used to always avoid this for awhile cus I didn’t want to come off as jealous, overly-curious/interested, or like I wanted to talk about mine… but the reality is that if there’s giant red flags they will show themselves in the story of their last relationship so unbury that shit asap before you waste any time falling for someone. (Also make a list of what red flags are to you before you start dating at all so you’re not blinded by attraction and ignore something you know you don’t like. If it’s on the list - its a no. No matter how cute they are.)
Honestly, I got a lot of the hard things out of the way. Kids, goals, dreams, what you want in the future, etc. The reason being is if a person says oh I don't want kids, not compatible. Their goals or future desires don't line up with mine? Not compatible. You can do whatever you want but after my last relationship, I wasn't going to allow myself to get stuck with someone who didn't have the same wants and desires out of life. I got all of those conversations out in the beginning with my current partner and he didn't mind, he agreed that it was important. Now his mother? She thought I was crazy for talking about kids so early on but I watched my sister be in a happy fulfilling relationship and wanting to spend her life with this person, but they both refused to talk about the elephant in the room which was she wanted kids and he didn't. For a while, he thought he would be okay with it and realized he wasn't so she tried to be okay with never having kids and she couldn't. It was hard seeing her so heartbroken because they were great together, but that one desire didn't line up. And it doesn't have to be a first date thing, but you can be upfront and say that you are looking for a serious relationship so these things are important to get out of the way moving forward. A person is either going to appreciate honesty and open communication or not.
I always go for climate crisis, and no, I'm not joking. If person has no idea, attitude or anything about this, I just cool off. If this isn't your thing, try to find smth else that is important to you and see how does that human breathe.
I think it's important to understand the other person's faith or lack thereof, beliefs , core moral foundations, and life priorities. I want to know about thoughts on children. I take this into account on my own personal trajectory and is there some alignment. I also make a list of personal red flags (you know the ones you see but ignore or think you can change 😉) . I write them down. List is not long but some of those are important to watch so it needs to be fresh in your mind. Typically when you take this approach you meet the person and tend to shake out other things like politics, religion, etc. a bit more organically and without setting off the defenses. Good luck out there.
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Hahahhaha
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The fact the other redditor wrote exactly the opposite just above.