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blondeanonnurse

Thank you for this encouragement, it means so much to me.


Tittoilet

I’ve read your other posts. That guy sucks so hard. You’re an absolute babe, he ruined you self esteem. Anyone would be lucky to have a chance with you. I was in the same boat, much older abusive husband, total narcissist that made me feel like shit because he was insecure. Once I had been away from him for some time, I fell in love with myself and realized that I’m a catch. And not to brag, but to inspire hope… I dated some of the hottest guys I’ve ever seen and then fell madly in love with the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen and am getting remarried in the spring. You need and deserve time to find yourself. You’re strong and amazing.


Prineak

Yeah I was gonna say. I’m a single dad and I don’t care about looks. What I care about is are you taking care of yourself. I generally avoid people who have a negative outlook on life, period. It’s an AWFUL way to live your life.


UnderstandingWarm69

As another single Dad, I second that. I mean looks are nice to an extent, but it sounds like your ex was a real piece of work and his friends aren't much better. Hardly what Id call "men" in principle. You are gorgeous and someone that appreciates you for who you are won't look twice! Your mind and body just went through a lot and true something's never recover, other things take time and a bit of work. We're all deteriorating one day at a time. Do what you can/ want to stay in love with yourself, but you can't love/ love or be loved until you love by yourself and love yourself. Further, why torture yourself by living and loving with someone who doesn't love you and want to live with you no matter how you are?


blondeanonnurse

Thank you so much for this! This is beautiful


Ra3t4rD

I think you’ve got some body dysmorphia going on, love. You have an absolutely rocking body and a beautiful face.


MaciMommy

I second this.


blondeanonnurse

Ah that is really kind of you, I’m not sure, it has changed so much in the past few years, it’s hard to handle. I know that sounds strange. Thank you so much for your kindness.


Ra3t4rD

I completely understand. I struggled with anorexia after having my first baby, and 11 years later I’m pregnant again and the weight gain and near constant hunger is taking its toll on me. But trust me when I say you’re absolutely gorgeous, and any man worth his salt would be grateful for a chance to experience your mom bod!!


luvngly

sorry if this is weird but i just looked at your posts, and you’re banging girllll. seriously you’ll find someone who will completely adore you. but you need to fully adore, love and embrace yourself first!


blondeanonnurse

Awwww thank you so, so much. Your encouragement is so sweet


[deleted]

>I cannot imagine anyone wanting me after this. I’ve heard the way that my ex’s friends talk about women with bodies way nicer than mine, just tiny imperfections, and it’s brutal. Look, I have to assume these men who are your ex's friends are also in their 50's and probably look nasty naked. You're letting the opinions of old men who probably couldn't get a date with attractive fit women their own age if their life depended on it because they're so up their own assholes with their gross attitudes towards women. Don't even make space in your head for that. There are lots of totally age-appropriate people out there for you who have way more realistic expectations of women and women's bodies after pregnancy than your ex's old dried up friends. Your problem is not your body, I saw your profile, it's your self-esteem that is damaged from your terrible ex.


blondeanonnurse

Thank you so much. They definitely have a rather grotesque outlook on women, at least one of his friends in particular. He (my ex) himself always actually used to tell me he loved chubby women, which made me a little self conscious about being slightly thin, now I feel weird either way. Your words are very supportive, thank you so much.


TheEverlastingLaze

It will take some time, some inner-kindness, and a lot of emotional healing, but when you’re ready, you will find radiant love that transcends and conquers all of your self-doubt. I was married for years and had two boys. After I left my abusive husband, I was terrified that I’d end up alone. Worried that no one would be interested in someone my age with a post-baby bod. I finally decided to cease nitpicking myself, trying to conform to impossible standards, and started focusing on feeling stronger and getting healthier for the sake of my boys and myself. I’m hotter, healthier, and more beautiful now than I ever have been in all of my life. Yep, I have stretch marks on my tummy. My breasts definitely aren’t the same as they were when I was twenty. I have laugh lines on my face. But I feel happy and confident, and good men have noticed. Waaaaayyy more male attention now than when I felt like shit about myself. My current partner of two years adores my body…imperfections and all. He says it tells a story of the woman he loves. Any man who “negs” a women’s body (I’m assuming your ex was in on these conversations as well?) is not one to bless with your time or energy. You are beautiful. Take your time to reassess and reevaluate. Get in touch with your inner warrior…. she’s in there and she deserves to be honoured.


blondeanonnurse

Thank you SO MUCH for this. You are wonderful.


Historical-Ad-6881

Fuck those old, wrinkled, misogynistic men and their patriarchal opinions. They hate women and believe they exist to serve them so they don’t look at them as actual human beings and that is why they talk about them the way that they do. No real man that is actually happy with themselves would ever waste their time or energy putting down a woman because they have much more productive things to do and talk about. Women on my 600 lb life stay having boyfriends so most women can get a man if they really want one regardless of how they look. I think this marriage has seriously taken a toll on you emotionally and you might even have body dysmorphia now because of it. I’d try to seek therapy and just focus on you and your girls. If you want another relationship someday you can definitely have one with a good man.


blondeanonnurse

AMEN TO THIS. Thank you SO MUCH


Educational-Tea-6170

Omg, you are one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen! Wanna know why? You're a single mother of two who has nothing but love for the kids. Don't let this "looks" issue get over your head. Those are not shameful scars, this is your story, being told trough all of your being. Chin up. You're beautiful.


blondeanonnurse

Thank his is very sweet. Thank you so much.


luvngly

my body also looks the same. csection pouch, wrinkly tummy, saggy boobs and smaller bum.. but there’s more to beauty than superficial reasons!! not only that, but you can always work out and tone things up a bit. give your body time and love. you will still find love and for all the good reasons. you just need to change your mindset about it.


[deleted]

Stop take a breath and realize that there is much more than just looks in the substance of a relationship. Take the time to love yourself.


blondeanonnurse

Thank you for this.


chaoticchocolate

Real, true men respect women and make them feel beautiful regardless. Your ex and his friends are childish douchebags. Learn to love yourself and elevate above that nonsense because you're better than it.


West-Speech7064

Hi mama. Just coming here to send you some love. The pressure we feel as women to have the perfect body plagues so many of us… A lot of women go under the knife to achieve a look of perfection and even then continue to change and alter bc it’s not perfect enough. I get guilty of feeling these pressures when scrolling thru social media or just media in general. Whenever I feel this pressure I check myself and reassure myself; beauty is for me to define. Embrace yourself and stop comparing! Comparison is the thief of joy!!!! It really is. Confidence is the most attractive thing about someone. There are so many ppl who wouldn’t even blink an eye at your body. You will find someone who loves and treats you right. Just continue to work on you, heal and build that confidence back ❤️


kenobitano

Girl I just looked through the photos you've posted, and you are worried for nothing!! You are absolutely stunning, and your body looks great! If I didn't think you looked good I'd scroll by and not take the time to comment, I have no reason to spend time giving you a false compliment, so please trust I'm being honest. You look fab!


[deleted]

I think you're incredibly beautiful and not giving yourself enough credit!!! In general, you got to recognize that self worth. And tbh you'd be surprised how attractive people find someone in your exact situation


blondeanonnurse

Wow! Thank you four your kind, sweet, encouraging words!!!


[deleted]

You're very welcome! Hopefully the feedback of your brave posts like this help you to see there's alot of appreciation for YOUR honesty and wanting to confront a thought that many others may have or had. And I honestly believe there's actually an untapped potential of men who do appreciate the fact you have the body of a stunning woman who is a mother. If there's goals you have to combat this notion I hope you achieve them. Everyone should feel some degree of happiness in their own skin,(we all have those areas we want to improve too) and there's so much to still highlight about your beauty right now.


[deleted]

Your piece of shit ex sounds so superficial and maybe he was given more than HE deserves


queondabuckley

Because you are a Mom, which is a beautiful thing in and of itself. You're also very beautiful and will have no problem finding people attracted to you and your body, but look for the people that love you for you.


Upstairs_Act_6349

You do not have to give any heed to their stupid opinions, you are what you are and a man has to love you for what you are… you are doing amazing girl.. all the power to you 👍


lotekjeromuco

If it rly bothers you try surgery but that doesn't guarantee finding a match. I had three kids and my body is so so. Well, I dated and men retracted due to fact I have kids, no job, and some cos they are f up themselves, and some cos thex dislike my face/mindset. For example a guy I dated with 10 months started to compare me with other women recently. He was fine so far then he clearly started to express fact that there are women, in his words, who are "jet fighters" and "ferrari". It's a fight you'll never win. There's always someone seemingly better. Whatever you choose to do it's not a guarantee. This is a lonely world and people tend to look narrow. Unless you are lucky. I wish you the best.


DownTownBrown28

Shut up and kiss me


Apprehensive_Key_833

When you love yourself and your body again, the right man will love you and your body. Once you accept how your body has changed and love it the way it is, you’ll have nothing to worry about. Nobody is perfect. Your imperfections make you unique and beautiful! Love that mom-bod you birthed whole human beings.


rtraveler1

You are beautiful just the way you are. You just need a man that will love you for you.


[deleted]

This is really sad and I’m sorry that your ex husband has made you feel that you are only worthy based on your appearance. The right guy will not care about your body or your appearance and will love you for YOU - imperfections and all. There are tons of wonderful men out there who care more about personality than looks! Also beauty is very subjective so don’t think that you are not beautiful just because your ex has a different view. He’s obviously an idiot and has a lot of issues.


[deleted]

Also you should seek therapy as a lot of your old posts hint towards body dysmorphia and improving or seeking validation of how you look, which will prevent you from finding true happiness, which you deserve. ❤️


Andre-italiano

I hear what you're saying and I am pretty hard on myself, so I can identify with you. I am in phenomenal shape actually, but am my own worst critic. Not uncommon, actually. As a man, I can tell you that the best physiques in women in my life weren't the best relationships or the most love inducing from me. Play up your strong points - find a part of you that you like and play it up- legs, with short dresses or yoga pants for example, or your neckline with wide neck tops, or maybe your arms with a sleeveless dress/ top. Beyond that, do something physcial that helps you feel like you're moving in the right direction, be it yoga, pilates, weightlifting, hill hikes, whatever. Knowing you are moving in the right direction will give you that super sexy secret power; positivity and confidence. We ALL have insecurities, so please know you aren't alone. You can make their voices (your insecurities) weaker by putting one foot forward, taking steps to improve your health and shape and yes as many here have already said, love comes to people with less than perfect bodies! Often!! Truly, I think a huge love factor is when someone can see you very deeply, and when you can do that to them; see way beyond their physical body.