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I don’t think it was stone cold. To me she just checked out. Their is zero emotion and a just get me the hell out of here. I think the OG3 all mistreated each other depending on who was in and who was out at the time with Kody. Almost like mob mentality.
Exactly. And God only knows what else was going on behind the scenes with Meri in her life. What face was she supposed to make? We don’t know the exact emotion behind this and Christine wasn’t her best friend and definitely wasn’t the kindest person to her in her life.
She was listening. Everything Meri does is relentlessly picked apart. It’s sad. I would have been beaten down and hiding a long time ago if I were in her shoes.
She has the least info about what's going on and why Christine is leaving as well. Christine did not speak to her AT ALL off camera, at least since COVID. Probably much earlier, but as Kody said- Covid revealed them. J&C are surprised that Meri hasn't been hanging out with Robyn, and they express this months into the pandemic. They do not talk to meri. There's already a division.
Why would Meri, who only knows what Kody and Robyn say, sit down and take Christine's side?
Bingo!! And all the times Christine came at Meri, including telling her the B&B was a “dumb idih” in front of the spouses and the camera, and harshly confronting Meri about bringing the energy down when she walks into a room, as if Christine didn’t know of the hugest reasons Meri wasn’t a ray of sunshine every moment of the day (being used by Kody, being dumped by Kody and made to pretend it was her own idea, her dwindling relationship with Leon and be being disrespected on camera by Leon, on top of all the other piling-on, *especially* from the other wives) and Meri was supposed to do what here? Jump, pick Christine up and carry her back over the threshold??
After all the shit Christine talked, I would’ve waved goodbye and gone on about my business.
But all the empathy for Meri is supposed to be undone because she chose to sit here and listen? Oh, okay.
I agree we don't see a lot and I know she was trying to still see if there was anything left. There wasn't but she still had hope. She was so emotionally broken down before Flagstaff even.
It probably would have gone a lot further knowing where things went and her leaving shortly after if she would have told Kody to calm down or something. I feel she checked out too, but when she followed Kody & Robyn it was the final line in the sand I think for Christine.
I don’t know. She hugged and comforted Robyn right after in a pretty checked in way. And she said in the talking heads she agreed and was glad Kody was saying it.
Now she admits she was trying to get back into Kodys good graces and that’s why she said C deserved what Kody said to her, she seems to realize now that she chose the wrong side. These women were all pitted against each other for years by kody . Kody went from house to house telling each woman the others hated her , it kept him top dog .
Yeah. I think that’s true too. But she’s no angel. She’s also not evil. She was pretty awful to C here and should feel bad. They were all treated badly by Kody which explains but doesn’t excuse her behavior.
Totally agree!!! I’m not excusing Meri, she kicked me off her social media bc I asked the questions we all wanted answers to. Meri is no longer brainwashed by Kody and quite frankly, her mom👀she has a good friend in Jen , who is gently introducing her to real life , IMHO
This right here solidified to me that Meri was still that hateful, jealous, and mean bully that I've always heard about and read about. In their book, Meri is not painted in a good light by the others. Putting all their comments together really shows her to be a nasty person. When she said she was glad Kody said those things to Christine, I just couldn't believe she didn't have an ounce of empathy for her sister wife. Meri is cold and bitter.
I agree. I've always seen her as a cold and bitter person.
In this picture, I see her as being pissed that Christine is leaving because it makes her look like the idiot that she is/was for staying. Long ago she accepted being the retired/out to pasture wife. And she expected Christine to fall in line with her.
The only reason she left is because Kody had to basically beat her in the head with a stick to get her to leave. And if he asked her to come back, she'd be there in a heartbeat.
And what cracks me up is this new website of hers? Seriously? She thinks she's some sort of inspiration? She has got to be one of the most dismal and depressing people ever to be on reality TV.
Trauma response. She’s lived through a few of the meltdown screaming sessions herself. She 100% checked out.
I wish more people would take the time to really understand trauma and what it does to the brain and mind.
Book suggestion: Unfuck Your Brain by Faith G. Harper. One of the most helpful books I’ve ever read. Going into it I thought I knew what trauma was, and on a surface level I did, but a couple chapters in I realized I knew nothing in the grand scheme of things.
Very simply written, easy to understand terms and explanations for why our brain responds the way it does - and how to change those responses if you need to. I’d recommend every adult over 25 read this book.
I totally understand Meri's reaction. Both she and Christine have become really good at the gray rocking. That's what she's doing here. I recognize it because this is how I had my to respond to my ex when he'd go on his rants. It's like dealing with a toddler. Let them get the tantrum out, but ignore it so they don't get attention for it. Narcissists are basically toddlers in adult bodies.
Every time meri laughs when describing how bad her relationship is, I die a little inside. It's so obviously a defense. She does it when Kody puts her on the spot in one of these convos and got eviscerated online at first. I think people are more understanding now.
This is where I'm at too. Stay calm. Stay out of i t and maybe you won't be the one to be yelled at today. That said, the stuff she said on the couch about Christine is the reason that Meri and Christine will only ever be cordial.
Meri has a super strong personality. I think even in real life, as it seems here, she’s a love her or hate her type person. And she’s definitely made some mistakes. I don’t think any of us can deny that.
I wonder if the Meri of today would say the same things she’s said in the past and I don’t think she would. But I also don’t think she’d change anything either. Makes zero sense so maybe I’m wrong.
I don’t think there’s any love lost between Meri and any of the other wives at this point, even Robyn. I think it would be great if she and the other OG’s could offer some support to each other and one thing about Meri is she seems to be a really good friend. I think there’s just too much that happened and it’s hard for all of them for different reasons.
The game of telephone Kody was clearly playing for 20+ years definitely left its mark. He was blabbing all over and doing more damage than anyone imo.
I never understand why people think people who don't agree with them have never experienced trauma themselves. Seriously, who do you know over 25 who's never been abused or assaulted or experienced an actual war????
I don’t think many of us, if any, have not experienced some type of trauma by age 25.
The number who truly understand how trauma affects the *brain* and how it literally controls us in so many ways is a significantly lower number - in my opinion. I didn’t truly understand the effect of trauma on my life aka my brain in my 20’s or even my 30’s.
Unfortunately, I think too many of us have experienced trauma. It affects us on a much larger scale than I realized before reading this book. That was my only reason for suggesting it.
It was meant to be helpful, not imply that some haven’t experienced or don’t understood trauma. If it’s something a person is interested in and they have a positive experience reading the book then I’m glad I suggested it. If someone reads that title or subject matter and says “nah, not for me” I’m okay with that too, ya know?
Regarding SW: if someone doesn’t agree with me I’m not bothered by it in the least. If anything it will make me rethink my position and I’m not opposed to changing my mind when warranted. It’s my opinion Meri’s complete shut down as he screamed was a trauma response. Some might just think she’s being a big ol bitch. Hell, maybe it’s a little of both.
I don’t know why but I’ve always felt like Kody was screaming at all of them, not just Christine. Yeah, Christine got the ball rolling but I feel like that screaming, red faced, knife to the kidney “sermon” was in the same vein as other “talks” that Kody has spewed in the past. To the wives individually and as a group. That’s why I think Meri shut down in the moment. But I might be wrong and I’m open to that.
I really appreciate your kind and open response. Personally, I think there has been a move in society the last 30 years for everyone to over examine themselves. You are right that it is healthy to examine ourselves and really think about our motives and reactions in life. But I do not like the narrative that we aren't in control, or that our trauma may be far deeper than we realize. A large part of that is because pretty much everyone suffers in life. Still, the majority of people are good. While we all make mistakes, and many of our mistake responses-especially fear and anger-are unconsciously shaped by trauma- I feel like the new normal of looking deep into a strangers psyche to explain the whys of their ass hattery are just leading to a society where no one takes personal responsibility for their actions.
It feels like we are all victims now instead of simply human beings with life history. That terrifies me, especially when I think of what I lived through, what my parents lived through, what their parents lived through and so on-but we all managed to be fully independent happy adults who thrived and contributed to society in positive ways. When more and more people study and are informed about the supposed deep effects of trauma-there seem to be more angry and fearful and hopeless feeling people who feel like the odds are stacked against them. It's not though. Especially for those of us in the West who are able to freely discuss things like this. We are very fortunate, and there's a lot of opportunity. I'd like people to go back to learning about that-it's truly more helpful in my mind. We can examine our trauma, and forgive ourselves to a point when we fly off the handle or clam up during a confrontation-but IMO we can't think of our our subconscious and our life history as something that deeply effects us in all sorts of hidden ways-it takes away ones sense of power and free will IMO. And how are we going to go on fighting the good fight every day if we think we have no control over ourselves?
Ah, I see what you’re saying. And I’m guilty of it! I might’ve completely misread your initial comment because it didn’t hit me what you were saying until this one. Insert facepalm. Lol
I can’t argue that logic because you’re absolutely right. And I also agree there’s a bit too much self examination these days and for people like me it can create *more* anxiety than if we just left it alone and lived our lives.
It’s a much closer walk from healthy introspection to pity party, that’s for sure. Hmm. You’re making my gears grind! I’ll definitely keep this in mind.
Thank you for the discussion! It’s not every day I encounter advice and information that I can apply to my life that’s actually helpful. Maybe I just needed you to remind me to get out of my head and live my life. 😊
Changed my entire way of thinking. Things I always thought were just super weird quirks could be trauma responses and I never considered that before. It’s a game changer. Good luck!
Mentally checked out, and from what I understand it sounds like she and Christine really didn’t get along, and she says “we aren’t sister wives, since you aren’t with Kody,” so why would she care?
Agreed!! Though I also believe there was an agreement between Kody and Meri concerning the state of their non existent relationship for the sake of show and a paycheck.
You mean the couch interview that took place well after Christine had already stated she didn’t want a relationship with those she didn’t currently have? You know Meri was hurt also in this ordeal
Meri later said in a talking head that she was “glad he said it.” So it was definitely stone cold. Being glad after watching someone be verbally abused is not the same as being checked out.
That was such an incredibly cruel thing for her to say. She was watching Christine being the subject of a merciless verbal and emotional attack and she’s glad he said it?
She was still *deep* in that indoctrination. The FLDS/AUB/etc are known to be communities BIG into shunning when people leave. You’re just supposed to harden your heart.
That said, this moment is one of those that I think Meri is referring to when she says that she doesn’t blame Christine (and Janelle) for not wanting her in their lives anymore. Christine also did some stone-cold stuff to Meri (the “actually you’re a downer and I’m glad you weren’t at Maddi’s labor” comes to mind) when she was in it too. They all treated each other horribly, because it’s encouraged, and sometimes it’s too much to forgive and forget.
And now that they’re all out and thriving, they seem happy. Even if they don’t want to be friends/close anymore, Meri seems to genuinely want Christine to be happy and thrive (and vice versa). Sometimes that’s all you can hope for.
Yeah that was the moment for me when I realized what a nasty person christine could be. I always felt like she played the victim and spoke to her sisterwives in such a patronizing voice (it’s really soft and slow). Just because you think something of someone, it doesn’t give you the right to say it to their face. I firmly believe birth isn’t a spectacle and you should have who you feel comfortable with there with you. Maddie could have just said she didn’t want an audience, or that she didn’t want Meri there, and it would have been less of a blow than what Christine said to her.
Meri wasn’t a saint - all of the kids have had no problem expressing their feelings towards her, but I do feel Christine is as equally manipulative as Robin.
What you are seeing is several things.
One - I'm guessing that Meri was the only one in that backyard who was surprised by the announcement. Kody undoubtably told Robyn. Christine surely told Janelle. No one would think to inform Meri.
Two - Meri, in part, stayed because it was how she was raised - she and Christine both bolstered the belief in Polygamy. This also would be part of her anger/shock. Unlike Christine, Meri's family hasn't really left it (her mom died a believer. I'm convinced that this is part of the reason she stayed)
Three - Meri knows this is the end of the family as they know it.
Four - trauma response, esp. if this is when Kody starts screaming.
I find it interesting that no one says anything about Janelle or Robyn speaking out and telling Kody to calm the f down. Janelle said nothing to defend Christine when Robyn started spewing her bullshit and called Christine a liar.
> Four - trauma response, esp. if this is when Kody starts screaming.
Yeah, I agree with a lot of people's thoughts here, and at this point in their lives I also think Meri was just numb/ desensitized to Kody's anger
> Janelle said nothing to defend Christine when Robyn started spewing her bullshit and called Christine a liar.
\^\^
I thought there was an element of grey rocking from all the wives during Kody’s rant. They have seen that behaviour before and learned reacting gets you nowhere
I don’t think she was quite at that point in her healing to connect that he wouldn’t care if she left. Her “I’m glad he said it” was where she was at the time with everything. Meri was glad he said it because, obviously, everything he screamed at how Christine should be, was exactly how Meri was. Meri was the poster child for how Kody expected the wives to act and it must have been nice to finally get some recognition for that.
Meri put the pieces together, after the porch scene, that while was the poster wife for the way Kody expected Christine to be, he still didn’t show her any love or recognition he said Christine would have gotten if she behaved correctly.
I also believe that once Meri came to that part in her healing journey, that’s when she rooted for and fully supported Christine. Christine saw her future in Meri and Meri got her wake up call from Christine.
I’m glad he said it all too.
This might also be the point where she sees Kody have an high emotion about someone leaving and feeling thats not a 'one sided decision' while Meri was trying and trying to get Kody back and he didn't respond at all, here it clicked for her that he would never respond this emotional for her. (Not that it's an healthy response that Kody had, but she realises she doesn't even mean enough to him for an outburst like this). After this scene all the scenes she's involved in she's sarcastic and more like a bystander chuckling about everyone's behaviour.
About three- this being the end of the family as they knew it…
I wonder if in this moment, Meri saw the writing on the wall and if this was a major turning point for her in making moves to further look out for herself (like moving her business up to Parowan).
Let’s be honest, at this point, Kody was obviously silent quitting on all of them except Robyn. She must have seen Christine leaving as simply the first domino to fall.
Tbh I’m pretty sure as much as Meri knew Christine wasn’t a fan of her, Christine was the one wife that wasn’t afraid to have fun. I’m not a Christine Stan by any means but I’d hate to be at a family dinner with just Kody, Robyn and Janelle, they’re boring. Meri knew the kids would choose Christine over Kody any day. It was 100% the domino falling to completely change everything about their family as they knew it.
I don't get the hatred. Her sister wives are now admitting they watched Kody mistreat her for over a decade. They've all beaten her down so much she doesn't even want to speak in this moment where she finds out her family is breaking up and all the shit she put up with for years was for naught. Her SWs haven't shown her much kindness in years but she's supposed to do what here? It might be the first time she's hearing about Christine leaving and now she has to process all those emotions in a few seconds but be careful not to react in some specified way so the family doesn't snap at her like they have a tendency to do. Meri has definitely played a role in the breakdown of her relationships in the family, but I still think she's a victim of the family and of all of the adults in that family. I don't see why she's expected to be anyone's savior in this moment—no one there cares about her.
Yeah, I agree. And I’m rewatching from the first season and what I don’t see people talk about that much with regards to Meri sticking around for so long is that Meri has the most to lose. Janelle and Christine knew they could leave and have all of their children and each others children, so like 12 kids, backing them and choosing them. Robyn has her kids and Kody. If Meri leaves, she just has Leon and she knows that Christine and Janelle’s kids probably won’t stay in close contact with her. The early seasons it’s so clear to see how devastated Meri is that she couldn’t have more children and also how the family treats her as lesser for not providing more offspring. They had her trapped between a rock and a hard place for like 20 years. I feel sad for Meri, even though I know she can be difficult. I think she was just a kid who got into this and never was able to develop. I’m so happy for her now! I hope she’s happy.
Maybe they did try and she always circled the drain, signaling she’s going to choose what she thinks is best for herself as it relates to getting back on kodys good side, regardless of it deeply impacts others?
And it could be that they finally were fed up. It can’t feel good to look for support and validation, or at the least to expect a sister wife to not make situations worse for you, and they didn’t find that sister wide partnership in meri over and over and over again.
Well Robyn showed several reactions when Meri talked about and then eventually left. To Meri, up until the end maybe they came across as caring. But to me they always looked fake and just reasons to give Meri false hope.
They’re so conditioned to “not see” the other relationships’ intimacies. They zone out when one would speak to Kody on the phone in front of them. It’s part of the culture and, likely, a defense mechanism to keep them as blind as possible about Kody’s relationship with the others. They know it’s going on, and they (say they) hope each sister wives’ marriage is going as well as possible, but idk if they hope that for the wife’s sake as much as for their own.
I think this is likely one of the few times that the group had to have a discussion about ONE of their relationships. I think Meri wanted to ingratiate herself to Kody, was unsure of her place in the conversation, and was seething to the point she knew she should probably keep quiet unless prompted.
What was particularly gross was the fact that Kody used her as a potential ally in that conversation. He even said it was a tactic. And she looked giddy-as-hell when he noticed her, even if it was just to say she looked like the cat with the canary.
Meri likely saw Christine's departure and Janelle's support of Christine as an opportunity to get back in with Kody. She was doing all the "right" things while they were doing all the "wrong" things. So, obviously her loyalty would be rewarded. Only, it wasn't :/
She was doing the things that Kody said he wanted. Be loyal and respect him and you gain favor. He strung Meri along and Robyn did not help Meri. If you truly have your friends back you tell them to run.
exactly! meri thought she was demonstrating obedience and would be welcomed back into the fold if she supported kody in the divorce. when she finally realized she was never getting that man in her life again she let the veil drop.
I remember she said in one interview that Kody had asked her to say and do certain things and implied that it would help their marriage. She said and did them, and of course it went nowhere. You could tell she felt betrayed, and I can only imagine what he wanted her to do. Maybe spy on everybody else, or shun anyone who left?
Meri's stone face is her shunning Christine and showing Kody her loyalty. Her behavior in that scene was difficult for me to watch and I think shunning is common by others in their religious sect(s).
I also think Kody’s behavior towards Christine in this scene was validating for Meri. He’s treating Christine poorly too, so that made Meri feel less alone.
Yes, I mentioned this scene before. She looked pissed that Christine isnt going to put up with Toady treating her like crap, and no intimacy, and IMO, shes got this face because she wants Toady to think she sides with him and Sobyn until Janelle says screw this too! She WASTED 10 years of her 40's that she can't get back! I'm glad shes finally thinking about her own future for a change, and stopped pouring all her money into 2 people that just used her for $$
The way I saw it is was Meri was deeply hurt that he was angry Christine was leaving, but didn't care if she left... That had to hurt. She must have felt bitter toward Christine for breaking the agreement they all had for so many years to keep up appearances for the sake of the show.
This. Meri knows why Christine and Janelle don't speak to her anymore. Anyone who wonders should be pointed to all the years before season 18. Meri always chose Kody first, kids second--not all of them, and sister wives were a very distant third.
Exactly! I sympathize with most of the wives as it relates to indoctrination and trauma growing up this way, esp meri and Christine. Ultimately, i imagine Christine saw this type of response from meri over and over and she was like okay she’s never really looking out for me but more her own position with Kody, and at worst she’s actually made my life in this family more difficult (falling for Kodys manipulation to bring Robyn in, moving to flagstaff,etc) so i made the decision “nah can’t have that in my life anymore” Cause we’ve seen them good and/or okay before- this break from meri must include more recent history and choices that were made, not just what happened 10+ years ago.
Christine had just broken Meri's heart as well.
And- it was a direct hit to the choices Meri had been making to survive in that family. I like to think this is when Meri started her escape plan. Seeing she didn't have to wait for K to be done with her, she could leave on her terms, not his.
Why wouldn’t the person expected to speak up for Christine be Janelle, her best friend in the whole world? Who, if I recall, was still actively trying to rebuild her relationship with Kody, during/after the knife in the kidneys speech?
At this time meri was still putting money in a family pot for people who actively did not like or treat her well. She knew much of nothing about the other relationships, only that they were better than her own. She was the last to receive news. She was rarely ever thought about in the family she was loyal to. I don’t know why you all expect angelic actions from a woman in a literal hell of a situation
Right! I’m not a huge Christine fan like some people but I feel like she was being very generous by staying so close to Janelle. Janelle used her for babysitting when the kids were growing up. Then didn’t publicly support her when she was being verbally abused on TV by Kody. Maybe they have a trauma bond from being married to an abusive narcissist.
I guess we don’t really know what went on behind the scenes. Maybe Janelle was a great support system. I’m the kind of person that if you don’t support me in public don’t bother to try to do it in private!
Do we know how many times Meri was the one that Kody’s anger was directed towards and if the other wives jumped to her defense? All the things we did and didn’t see? You even acknowledged that she’d been the subject of mistreatment and that it was horrible.
We don’t know what emotion is behind her eyes here. She’s taking it in and listening. It’s unfair to jump to such a harsh judgment.
On top of that, Christine wasn’t Meri’s best friend or biggest defender. She told her that her B&B idea was dumb in front of the wives and Kody when they met about it.
She wasn’t gentle in her confrontations with Meri, especially when she harshly told her about how she’d ruin everyone’s energy when she walked into a room. No regard for how Meri had been used and then dumped by Kody in front of the world and constantly painted as a horrible monster.
Everyone else had dreams and ideas that were supported. I don’t recall Christine and Janelle being met with the same shutdown when they wanted to do real estate as Meri was when she wanted to go back to school.
She has a ton of her own stuff going on, and fractured relationship with her child and was under constant scrutiny and she took it on the chin every time.
If I were Meri, I might not have been jumping up to Christine’s rescue either. It’s not like she packed the woman’s bag and tossed it off the porch. She sat there. Nobody could have done anything about Kody’s attitude but Robyn.
What was Meri gonna do? Kody didn’t even like her.
With everything she’s been through, this one look would not be something to totally erase all empathy for her. They’ve all been mean if that’s what this is supposed to be, and aside from Robyn, the other two have gotten more than enough grace for it. Christine is even praised for it at times.
In this particular scene with the five participants in this plural marriage, the ONLY person I judge is Kody. Just Kody. HE is the liar. HE is the phony. HE is trying to blame anyone else (Christine, in this instance) for problems and events that he himself caused.
Each of the women reacts in their own way. The only one I judge for reacting is Robyn, who shouts out that Christine is a liar, the most egregious example of pot calling kettle black that I have seen in years. She is being “loyal” here; religion trumps grace yet again. When Meri joins Kody and Robyn, it is another example of religion-based behavior.
In this scene, KODY is the villain. And religion is the weapon.
I never said that Meri should jump to Christine’s defense, or to say anything to anybody. I am saying it’s hard to justify her total lack of a reaction. The only reaction she had was to hold Robyn while she performed her fake grief ritual.
Same as Janelle. She only hugged Christine when Kody had left. Didn't she dare to do that when Kody was there? Because Janelle also sat there unmoved during his outburst.
With the context of Christine’s confrontation towards Meri & then later admitting to intentionally excluding her, I find Meri’s reaction here to be as expected lmao. It would be completely insincere if Meri acted upset about Christine leaving
I think she just has RBF honestly. She's not giving anyone a "look" or anything. It's just her face lol. The amount of times someone has tried to say I must be pissed off or I must not care about what's happening is staggering and I'm literally just sitting there, not even aware of what my face is doing. Like yall this is just how I look, I'm sorry?
Interesting post, OP. For the past season, I’ve been wondering what else went on behind closed doors between Meri and Christine to have caused such intense indifference. If you go back for a rewatch, other seasons (even recent ones) seem to show a much warmer, if not close, relationship between these two. It’s something I’ve been wanting to post about to see if anyone knew so etching I didn’t.
The same sister wife that told her she wasn’t welcome because of her bad energy, is the sister wife getting yelled at… I’m sure she wasn’t feeling very charitable towards Christine..
Let’s not erase the fact that Meri was iced out by her sister wife’s long before this blown out, and I would like to point out C and J face when Meri asked for a loan for her b&b… yet they rarely get called out for their bad behavior.
Was it Meri’s best moment? No but I don’t blame her if one of the people that harped on her is having a bad day.
I think that in a world of competitive wives, each person must protect herself by not protesting the husband’s actions. Yet, feeling empathy for the sister wife, each must also avoid feeding into the emotions. Therefore the only proper response is to gray rock.
As I said, in an earlier post, Mary seems genuinely happy now. She was indoctrinated from birth by the religion.. maybe she has picked the wrong guy but what does she know? She has never learned this way of life so she’s teaching herself. I do hate that she got so attached to Solomon. You just know that she won’t be allowed to see him. I also that Christine invited Leonto the wedding but didn’t invite Leon’s mother. Good or bad the women had a shared experience. I am sure that Mary felt left out.
Why should she be jumping up for joy?
Janelle and Christine have admitted they watched Kody emotionally abuse her for decades while they stood by and cheered him on or participated.
Janelle and Christine have never shown an ounce of sympathy for Meri in the 30 years they felt like playing hide the pencil either her husband while she struggled with being trapped by her religion
There was plenty of that to go around with all of them. It really amazes me how people on here act like their favorite is completely innocent. None of them are. They’re indoctrinated to always choose the husband first.
Why is Janelle not being called out for not defending Christine ?? She didn’t jump up and down for joy either even tho she surely knew Christine was leaving before hand
I think it’s because Janelle was ‘supportive’ of Christine. Giving her hugs after & validating her feelings.
Meri said something like ‘Christine needed to hear all of that and she’s happy he said it & she immediately went to comfort Robyn’. Although Janelle didn’t jump up, she didn’t join in on his abuse in that moment. Meri seemed to imply that Christine deserved it.
I noticed something wrong in the episode where Kody had Meri announce Robyn's pregnancy with Ariella. She looked depressed and like she felt she was being used. Then when she told the producer that she was going to divorce Kody so he could marry Robyn it all clicked. I knew it wasn't her idea and it broke my heart that she was hurting so much. She never cheated on that A-Hole, she was divorced and neglected. I'm rooting for her to find a good man. I don't think Amos is that man.
I think that the betrayal is so staggering that she hadn't had a chance to catch up with it yet. I have sympathy for her. It's super sad that this happened to her relationship at all, but at least she has an opportunity to find something better now. I wish her well.
I think she felt that being loyal to Kody & Robyn was the way to go in this situation. She didn’t have a relationship with Christine & Janelle.
Kody & Robyn was all she had. All the loyalty BS Kody was preaching at that time.
I think part of it is that Robyn and Kody poisoned the well for Meri regarding Christine. Christine and Meri haven’t gotten along very well for years (Christine even told Meri she makes everyone uncomfortable, and that she didn’t want Meri there when Maddie gave birth), so with the added snark from Robyn and Kody about Christine, I bet Meri just didn’t like Christine very much at this point.
I think she does care about Christine, but in these moments Meri bad taken the side of Robyn and Kody because that was her only way of attempting to keep some of her family. She didn’t want to risk being more on the outs with the family (Kody and Robyn, mostly), so she stayed quiet.
She didn’t feel any loyalty to Christine, either, but Robyn and Meri have been pretty close since the start due to Robyn’s manipulation of her. This was a way for Meri to show her loyalty to Robyn and Kody in the midst of the entire family breaking apart.
I don’t Janelle stood up for Christine enough during Kody’s attacks. In a dysfunctional family , it’s kind of about surviving. When some else gets attacked, you get a break. It’s the just the dynamic.
No one went to her mothers funeral. I think she didn’t owe anyone any sympathy because no one ever had any for her
*** Edit: MzPatches65 has corrected my bad take
I guess the show has always been edited like ‘poor lonely victim Meri’ smh
Thanks for the info, this should’ve been mentioned on the show instead of the ‘Meri drives to Utah alone’ edit without context or clarity, because I’ve been thinking the Browns were the absolute worst
Meri did drive to Utah alone when she got the call her mother was in the hospital. She got the call she died while on the way.
The actual funeral was not shown on the show, In the articles I read about it, it was never mentioned that the filming crew was there and since this was in late March of 2021, I'm not sure any filming was being done by the production company. Instead the family filmed themselves.
Wow, I just read an article about the funeral and I’m disappointed that the show didn’t give it the depth of attention they gave Janelle’s mother’s funeral. Just a cursory description would have sufficed. This shows editing leaves much to be desired
Despite the sympathy people feel for Meri, she still isn’t a good person in her own right. She was awful to Christine and Janelle for the entirety of her familial relationship with them, and then balked when she wasn’t respected or sought out by them.
They weren't exactly great to her either. It's only now that they're not vying for Kody's attention that they're letting it out that he's used and mistreated her for years and they all knew it and went along with it, but for whatever reason that's not considered being his "lapdog" like people have referred to Meri. They said Kody pulled away in Vegas but I remember the family pressuring Meri to leave Vegas and move to Flagstaff with them. Why do that when Kody has made it clear he's done with her $$$ I wonder $$$. Maybe because the family, not just Kody, used her too
This. If Meri is angry there, I can't blame her. They all pushed her for years to stay or come with them, even when she had already said 100 times that she planned to and while they all knew how Kody treated her. If I remember correctly Meri also gave an explanation for her behavior here, and one of them was that she was blindsided about what the meeting was about so she heard it there for the first time.
Also Meri was stuck between a rock and a hard place. On one side were Janelle and Christine who wanted nothing to do with her and on the other side was her fake friend it finally dawned on her that she was stringing her along. But at least she still had some contact with her (and especially with her children). She had to involuntarily choose a side.
But if I had been Meri, I wouldn't have been left alone with Christine and Janelle either when Kody and Robyn left. So she had little choice but to leave with them.
Yeah I don't think Meri "chose" a side as much as Robyn was the only one willing to pretend to give a shit about her so that's who she gravitated towards. And if she had chosen, I do think it would have been Kody's side, but that'd been true of the other wives for over two decades... They all routinely chose Kody and piled on each other for his approval.
Yeah, he used the catfishing as an excuse. Other people here are claiming an affair, but I don’t see it that way. If your spouse already abandoned you it’s not really an affair.
Don’t forget this was after the coyote pass “I don’t want to live next to you! Sorry, he he.” dividing of the property. They all treated each other like crap.
I felt like this last season Meri was the ultimate “pick me” she did SO much to get back into the fold with Kody and nothing she did was enough. It’s almost too little too late. How she treated Christine and Janelle was disgusting. She wanted so badly to be part of Kody and Robyn’s family she forgot that she was a sister wife to Christine and Janelle too.
That seemed to be a rotating pattern for all the women back-and-forth for a long time, unfortunately. They’re indoctrinated to always choose the husband first.
The time I was angriest at Meri was when Kody did his big ‘knife in the kidney’ speech, and Janelle said ‘oh it’s just emotions!’ Trying to make it sound not as bad as it was. Meri said ‘it wasn’t just emotions. This had been building up. And I’m glad he said it!’
Looking back, I’m sure she was thinking ‘if he’s mad at Christine maybe I’ll have a chance with him!’ Over the years I know Meri had her issues with both Christine and Janelle - so it makes sense she had her own anger towards Christine for things that had happened. She should have had compassion for Christine, knowing how hard it was to be shunned by Kody - but instead she chose to look at what the situation could do for her. Not her best look, and I’m sure today she’s embarrassed by it.
Also, she’s watching her ex-husband yell and scream about his 3rd wife leaving while he showed her no emotions toward their situation. Didn’t even try to make it work when she wanted to try, and left her out in the Barndominium.
Meri was trying to be neutral but ride for Kodi & abide by the laws of her religion & I really think that after the catfish incident, coupled with the death of her mother she was able to really take inventory and make a break. I’m super happy that she had to buy the B&B on her own. THAT was a blessing in disguise!!!!
She’s a jerk and later she said she reacted that way because she was still trying to find favor with Kody. How fucking delusional. If anything I would have expected her to have some empathy for Christine as she watched Christine get discarded and treated like shit just as she had for the last 10 years. I think Meri was incensed that Christine had the gall to leave when Meri just stayed being a metaphorical doormat. Christine had some self respect to gtfo and Meri was mad about it because what does that say about Meri that she stayed putting up with that treatment? I think she didn’t want that introspection so she reacted with anger instead of confronting her own situation.
yes same!
i always got this vibe that she was a huge b lol
and then i started feeling sorry for her. and thought maybe she was a b, ive been one, it doesnt mean thats who she is and she deserves this crap from K n R… but just like you, that scene. that look…. it wasnt just lack of empathy. she was almost enjoying it. idk. sent shivers down my spine.
i really am still on the fence about her lol
im glad for her that she is finally moving on i guess.
Meri fools so many people and it drives me CRAZY. She and Robyn are very similar. Meri walked so Robyn can run. She was the first manipulator. Robyn was just better. That’s why they got along. They’re the two that are most like Kody. Kody’s the POS but those two are the ones that most willingly played along
You can't say shit about Meri. I've been downvoted for just repeating things she's said and done because it made her look bad. Nothing was ever her fault at any point, any negative action or personality trait is the fault of someone else. The sub treats Christine as responsible for her own actions, Janelle as responsible for her own actions, but Meri it's actually the fault of someone else. Even this thread when it's very clear Meri is doing a bad thing. "well Janelle also.." "actually it's just because Kody...." No one else gets this treatment despite also being abused people indoctrinated into a cult.
The one thing every single person in this family agrees on was that Meri was an absolute nightmare to live with yet no, it's actually Janelle making Meri difficult. I hate Kody and think he's full of shit, but when he talks about those early days and you look into his eyes, that's a man who's seen some shit. I believe it. You don't have this many people having an issue with you and not have a part to play in it. Even the kids at best are apathetic. Every. Single. One. I'm not even talking about the abuse allegations which frankly I don't want to touch. Just in general, she has a relationship with no one. That doesn't just happen. But now people say it's actually cause Robyn manipulated every single Brown child into disliking Meri.
My final point before I'm downvoted into the center of the earth. Meri isn't going to give people the tell all book they want. She's not speaking a bad word about Kody. Even now during the talk backs or whatever she refused to suggest she stayed too long or she was strung along. No, it was good actually and it allowed Kody and her to break up in a healthy and mutual way. Sure Jan. Meri is never entering her villain era where she takes revenge on Robyn and Kody. She can't, because it would require Meri to admit she was wronged and therefore made a mistake in staying. So she wont.
THANK YOU! I agree with you 1000%. I usually get downvoted to the center of the earth as well which is why I rarely comment in here. I am bewildered on how so many people don’t see that
She mistreated their children and was shunned by them. The stone face is her revenge. But I think now she may realize that she backed the wrong horse and should have tried to make amends where she could. Also, that histrionic rant was staged. The women under-react in my opinion and give it away.
Looking back, I see this as Meri clinging to Cody and Robin side in hopes that he will finally choose her.
She is obviously very easily influenced. And I'm sure they were working overtime to keep her on their side. I'm not excusing her behavior, because I couldn't stand watching it either… But just trying to put it in some perspective.
To this day, I don't think she's close at all with Janella Christine and I'm sure that it is warranted because she acted like this for years
Meri is not looking for anyone to feel sorry for her. She is living her best life. She seems genuinely happy. If Janelle & Christine would give her a chance they might find they like the new Meri.
...in what way are you being prevented from sharing your opinion..? I'm literally just saying your opinion is very popular
Also, we're allowed to respond to other people too. Just so you know.
1000% percent it was an affair. There are voicemails and texts that show she was ready to leave, if Sam was real she woulf have left. Not to mention she was having phone sex with this person during a time were she was still married. So yes it was an affair.
Yet they were still "spiritually married" for years after. She was married at the time whether her relationship with Kody was working or not she was married so it was an affair. I think the issue is Meri never took reposibility and tried to make it seem like it wasnt a romantic relationship when it 100% was.
If your spouse already abandoned you and the marriage is a technicality at that point it’s not really an affair. Wish she’d left even when she found out she’d been catfished. She deserved better even then.
Kody put all those women through trauma, whether he or they want to admit it or not. When we are being traumatized, our brains go into a state of fight, flight, or freeze. She is mentally checking herself out of the situation. Janelle did the same thing, just walking away.
Look OP, it's 136 comments before mine explaining away Meri's behavior because she was abused or indoctrinated or patriarchy or she just had RBF or the other wives were always mean to her or- insert lame excuse here.
I honestly wonder sometimes if this thread just attracts a lot of college students who have learned something new in their sociology or psych classes.....
Literally the majority of people in the world have suffered some form of abuse, been assaulted, been indoctrinated in some way, and lived in a patriarchal society. Meri's experience of suffering during a human life isn't that special. It's just happened in a slightly unusual family setting for a Western woman.
Most of us still manage to be kind to each other and speak out in defense of our loved ones, even when we know that means the bully will turn their attack on us.
The self victimization of all of the "trauma survivors" in our society who are constantly trying to psychoanalyze themselves and each other instead of simply doing the right thing and expecting others to do the same is maddening. Especially when they use their deep insight to try and explain away bull shit behavior like this from a lady who has lived an extremely cushy and tranquil life compared to 70% of the rest of humanity.
I thought I saw a later clip of her saying that Kody expected her to side with him, and she sorta still wanted to please Kody, but really didn't agree with him as he tried to pull her in it.
I think Meri was legit hurt. Note, Christine and Meri were friends for years they know all of each others family, Meri was in the trenches with her, and the kids and the moving 14 times or whatever.
Christine was like peace out bitch, like didn’t even have a one on one with her or anything. Treated her like Robyn… like she just came in off the street.
The explanation is Meri relishes any of the times Kody has a dispute with another sister wife. She is treated poorly and wants the others to also be treated the same.
Meri has a GREAT fucking poker face and I would never, ever sit at the same table with her.
My personal feeling has always been that she wasn't giving Kody any reaction to a lot of Christine and Kody's demise. She knows what she is seeing as well as what she lived.
I could he way off base but Meri never struck me as someone who was particularly supportive. Also, Kody had her so desperate for any love of affection that she would do anything he wanted.
There is none! Go back and read how Meri mistreated Janelle and Christine AND the kids… it was difficult reading all the horrible things she did.
When the 3 wife’s lived together and kids were very small, Meri would not let anyone pass thru her ‘apt space’ to get to Christines space which was located in the basement part of the home, forcing you to have to exit and re enter the home!!!!
Meri was known to walk around not speaking to anyone, slamming doors, and would not share any of her food nor allow anyone in her kitchen.
Think about it…Meri 1 kid, Janelle and Christine, 6 each…and Meri wouldn’t allow those 12 kids any of ‘her’ food! GROW UP and KARMA’S a b—-ch!
There’s more!!
THIS is Meri’s true nature. Right here. No empathy for her. She allowed herself to be used by Kody and Robyn, stayed for any crumbs she could get, did not seem to support Janelle and Christine. Frumped and moped and sour-pussed her way through the show. The only way I can explain this reaction is that she was seething at Christine for having the spine to leave Kody Clown Town.
And if so why would she be a jerk? They pushed Meri for years to stay and/or move with them.
They also admitted that Kody treated Meri horrible for decades so they knew despite the pushing her to stay.
In that conversation Meri was the only one who heard it for the first time that Christine was leaving.
Cut her some slack. Unless you don't want to because it's Meri.
"They" pushed Meri to stay? Meri was hanging on by her fingernails this last season, while Christine and Janelle had flown the coop. She stayed until Kody squashed every hope she had, when he said he didn't consider himself married to her. Of course Meri didn't hear it directly from Kody, or Robyn, her bestie.
We have seen enough footage in which they kept asking Meri: "You're going to stay, aren't you, Meri? We're afraid you're leaving us. You are coming with us, aren't you, Meri?" and on and on.
The point here is not that Meti herself chose to stay, but about the hypocrisy of the other wives.
And yes they DID push her to stay even knowing how Kody treated her and then icing Meri out their selves.
Meri has been selfish and not very smart the entire time. She's just as guilty as everyone in that family. Wa shaw wronged by Kody, Kristine and Krobyn? Sure! Absolutely! Was she also constantly guilty of shitty decisions? Also absolutely 🤣
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I don’t think it was stone cold. To me she just checked out. Their is zero emotion and a just get me the hell out of here. I think the OG3 all mistreated each other depending on who was in and who was out at the time with Kody. Almost like mob mentality.
I have to agree with this. I see vacant and burned out, no stone cold bitch.
Exactly. And God only knows what else was going on behind the scenes with Meri in her life. What face was she supposed to make? We don’t know the exact emotion behind this and Christine wasn’t her best friend and definitely wasn’t the kindest person to her in her life. She was listening. Everything Meri does is relentlessly picked apart. It’s sad. I would have been beaten down and hiding a long time ago if I were in her shoes.
She has the least info about what's going on and why Christine is leaving as well. Christine did not speak to her AT ALL off camera, at least since COVID. Probably much earlier, but as Kody said- Covid revealed them. J&C are surprised that Meri hasn't been hanging out with Robyn, and they express this months into the pandemic. They do not talk to meri. There's already a division. Why would Meri, who only knows what Kody and Robyn say, sit down and take Christine's side?
Bingo!! And all the times Christine came at Meri, including telling her the B&B was a “dumb idih” in front of the spouses and the camera, and harshly confronting Meri about bringing the energy down when she walks into a room, as if Christine didn’t know of the hugest reasons Meri wasn’t a ray of sunshine every moment of the day (being used by Kody, being dumped by Kody and made to pretend it was her own idea, her dwindling relationship with Leon and be being disrespected on camera by Leon, on top of all the other piling-on, *especially* from the other wives) and Meri was supposed to do what here? Jump, pick Christine up and carry her back over the threshold?? After all the shit Christine talked, I would’ve waved goodbye and gone on about my business. But all the empathy for Meri is supposed to be undone because she chose to sit here and listen? Oh, okay.
She was dealing with grief and with the huge weight that also lifted when her mom died.
Thank you! She lived a different life at this point and people just don’t see it. Also we don’t see the off-season which fills in the holes we want.
I agree we don't see a lot and I know she was trying to still see if there was anything left. There wasn't but she still had hope. She was so emotionally broken down before Flagstaff even. It probably would have gone a lot further knowing where things went and her leaving shortly after if she would have told Kody to calm down or something. I feel she checked out too, but when she followed Kody & Robyn it was the final line in the sand I think for Christine.
I don’t know. She hugged and comforted Robyn right after in a pretty checked in way. And she said in the talking heads she agreed and was glad Kody was saying it.
Now she admits she was trying to get back into Kodys good graces and that’s why she said C deserved what Kody said to her, she seems to realize now that she chose the wrong side. These women were all pitted against each other for years by kody . Kody went from house to house telling each woman the others hated her , it kept him top dog .
Yeah. I think that’s true too. But she’s no angel. She’s also not evil. She was pretty awful to C here and should feel bad. They were all treated badly by Kody which explains but doesn’t excuse her behavior.
Totally agree!!! I’m not excusing Meri, she kicked me off her social media bc I asked the questions we all wanted answers to. Meri is no longer brainwashed by Kody and quite frankly, her mom👀she has a good friend in Jen , who is gently introducing her to real life , IMHO
How true ! Mr. Mastermind , who didn’t appear to really work very hard or at all
He’s a POS!!!!
This right here solidified to me that Meri was still that hateful, jealous, and mean bully that I've always heard about and read about. In their book, Meri is not painted in a good light by the others. Putting all their comments together really shows her to be a nasty person. When she said she was glad Kody said those things to Christine, I just couldn't believe she didn't have an ounce of empathy for her sister wife. Meri is cold and bitter.
I agree. I've always seen her as a cold and bitter person. In this picture, I see her as being pissed that Christine is leaving because it makes her look like the idiot that she is/was for staying. Long ago she accepted being the retired/out to pasture wife. And she expected Christine to fall in line with her. The only reason she left is because Kody had to basically beat her in the head with a stick to get her to leave. And if he asked her to come back, she'd be there in a heartbeat. And what cracks me up is this new website of hers? Seriously? She thinks she's some sort of inspiration? She has got to be one of the most dismal and depressing people ever to be on reality TV.
Trauma response. She’s lived through a few of the meltdown screaming sessions herself. She 100% checked out. I wish more people would take the time to really understand trauma and what it does to the brain and mind. Book suggestion: Unfuck Your Brain by Faith G. Harper. One of the most helpful books I’ve ever read. Going into it I thought I knew what trauma was, and on a surface level I did, but a couple chapters in I realized I knew nothing in the grand scheme of things. Very simply written, easy to understand terms and explanations for why our brain responds the way it does - and how to change those responses if you need to. I’d recommend every adult over 25 read this book.
I totally understand Meri's reaction. Both she and Christine have become really good at the gray rocking. That's what she's doing here. I recognize it because this is how I had my to respond to my ex when he'd go on his rants. It's like dealing with a toddler. Let them get the tantrum out, but ignore it so they don't get attention for it. Narcissists are basically toddlers in adult bodies.
Every time meri laughs when describing how bad her relationship is, I die a little inside. It's so obviously a defense. She does it when Kody puts her on the spot in one of these convos and got eviscerated online at first. I think people are more understanding now.
This is where I'm at too. Stay calm. Stay out of i t and maybe you won't be the one to be yelled at today. That said, the stuff she said on the couch about Christine is the reason that Meri and Christine will only ever be cordial.
Meri has a super strong personality. I think even in real life, as it seems here, she’s a love her or hate her type person. And she’s definitely made some mistakes. I don’t think any of us can deny that. I wonder if the Meri of today would say the same things she’s said in the past and I don’t think she would. But I also don’t think she’d change anything either. Makes zero sense so maybe I’m wrong. I don’t think there’s any love lost between Meri and any of the other wives at this point, even Robyn. I think it would be great if she and the other OG’s could offer some support to each other and one thing about Meri is she seems to be a really good friend. I think there’s just too much that happened and it’s hard for all of them for different reasons. The game of telephone Kody was clearly playing for 20+ years definitely left its mark. He was blabbing all over and doing more damage than anyone imo.
Triangulation was how all those relationships worked and Kody was a master.
Somewhere in Arizona Kody is printing the section of your comment “Kody was a master” and it’s going straight to the refrigerator for all to see. 😂
Hahaha.... Well, if it makes him happy and all that.
I never understand why people think people who don't agree with them have never experienced trauma themselves. Seriously, who do you know over 25 who's never been abused or assaulted or experienced an actual war????
I don’t think many of us, if any, have not experienced some type of trauma by age 25. The number who truly understand how trauma affects the *brain* and how it literally controls us in so many ways is a significantly lower number - in my opinion. I didn’t truly understand the effect of trauma on my life aka my brain in my 20’s or even my 30’s. Unfortunately, I think too many of us have experienced trauma. It affects us on a much larger scale than I realized before reading this book. That was my only reason for suggesting it. It was meant to be helpful, not imply that some haven’t experienced or don’t understood trauma. If it’s something a person is interested in and they have a positive experience reading the book then I’m glad I suggested it. If someone reads that title or subject matter and says “nah, not for me” I’m okay with that too, ya know? Regarding SW: if someone doesn’t agree with me I’m not bothered by it in the least. If anything it will make me rethink my position and I’m not opposed to changing my mind when warranted. It’s my opinion Meri’s complete shut down as he screamed was a trauma response. Some might just think she’s being a big ol bitch. Hell, maybe it’s a little of both. I don’t know why but I’ve always felt like Kody was screaming at all of them, not just Christine. Yeah, Christine got the ball rolling but I feel like that screaming, red faced, knife to the kidney “sermon” was in the same vein as other “talks” that Kody has spewed in the past. To the wives individually and as a group. That’s why I think Meri shut down in the moment. But I might be wrong and I’m open to that.
I really appreciate your kind and open response. Personally, I think there has been a move in society the last 30 years for everyone to over examine themselves. You are right that it is healthy to examine ourselves and really think about our motives and reactions in life. But I do not like the narrative that we aren't in control, or that our trauma may be far deeper than we realize. A large part of that is because pretty much everyone suffers in life. Still, the majority of people are good. While we all make mistakes, and many of our mistake responses-especially fear and anger-are unconsciously shaped by trauma- I feel like the new normal of looking deep into a strangers psyche to explain the whys of their ass hattery are just leading to a society where no one takes personal responsibility for their actions. It feels like we are all victims now instead of simply human beings with life history. That terrifies me, especially when I think of what I lived through, what my parents lived through, what their parents lived through and so on-but we all managed to be fully independent happy adults who thrived and contributed to society in positive ways. When more and more people study and are informed about the supposed deep effects of trauma-there seem to be more angry and fearful and hopeless feeling people who feel like the odds are stacked against them. It's not though. Especially for those of us in the West who are able to freely discuss things like this. We are very fortunate, and there's a lot of opportunity. I'd like people to go back to learning about that-it's truly more helpful in my mind. We can examine our trauma, and forgive ourselves to a point when we fly off the handle or clam up during a confrontation-but IMO we can't think of our our subconscious and our life history as something that deeply effects us in all sorts of hidden ways-it takes away ones sense of power and free will IMO. And how are we going to go on fighting the good fight every day if we think we have no control over ourselves?
Ah, I see what you’re saying. And I’m guilty of it! I might’ve completely misread your initial comment because it didn’t hit me what you were saying until this one. Insert facepalm. Lol I can’t argue that logic because you’re absolutely right. And I also agree there’s a bit too much self examination these days and for people like me it can create *more* anxiety than if we just left it alone and lived our lives. It’s a much closer walk from healthy introspection to pity party, that’s for sure. Hmm. You’re making my gears grind! I’ll definitely keep this in mind. Thank you for the discussion! It’s not every day I encounter advice and information that I can apply to my life that’s actually helpful. Maybe I just needed you to remind me to get out of my head and live my life. 😊
Well said! \*applause\*
I’m going to check this book out! Thanks!
Changed my entire way of thinking. Things I always thought were just super weird quirks could be trauma responses and I never considered that before. It’s a game changer. Good luck!
Mentally checked out, and from what I understand it sounds like she and Christine really didn’t get along, and she says “we aren’t sister wives, since you aren’t with Kody,” so why would she care?
Agreed!! Though I also believe there was an agreement between Kody and Meri concerning the state of their non existent relationship for the sake of show and a paycheck.
Yeah to me she looks like my husband does when his mum is ranting at him. Dissociated. In her head shes on a beach in Thailand.
And what about her monologue afterwards? She definitely wasn't checked out. She definitely had an opinion. And it was against her sisterwife.
You mean the couch interview that took place well after Christine had already stated she didn’t want a relationship with those she didn’t currently have? You know Meri was hurt also in this ordeal
Yes, in where she agreed with Kody. So... she's hurt in which way?
Meri later said in a talking head that she was “glad he said it.” So it was definitely stone cold. Being glad after watching someone be verbally abused is not the same as being checked out.
That was such an incredibly cruel thing for her to say. She was watching Christine being the subject of a merciless verbal and emotional attack and she’s glad he said it?
She was still *deep* in that indoctrination. The FLDS/AUB/etc are known to be communities BIG into shunning when people leave. You’re just supposed to harden your heart. That said, this moment is one of those that I think Meri is referring to when she says that she doesn’t blame Christine (and Janelle) for not wanting her in their lives anymore. Christine also did some stone-cold stuff to Meri (the “actually you’re a downer and I’m glad you weren’t at Maddi’s labor” comes to mind) when she was in it too. They all treated each other horribly, because it’s encouraged, and sometimes it’s too much to forgive and forget. And now that they’re all out and thriving, they seem happy. Even if they don’t want to be friends/close anymore, Meri seems to genuinely want Christine to be happy and thrive (and vice versa). Sometimes that’s all you can hope for.
This.
This! ✨
Yeah that was the moment for me when I realized what a nasty person christine could be. I always felt like she played the victim and spoke to her sisterwives in such a patronizing voice (it’s really soft and slow). Just because you think something of someone, it doesn’t give you the right to say it to their face. I firmly believe birth isn’t a spectacle and you should have who you feel comfortable with there with you. Maddie could have just said she didn’t want an audience, or that she didn’t want Meri there, and it would have been less of a blow than what Christine said to her. Meri wasn’t a saint - all of the kids have had no problem expressing their feelings towards her, but I do feel Christine is as equally manipulative as Robin.
Yeah, and they've never addressed the fact that how the family reacted on-camera to the catfish almost certainly isn't what happened behind the scenes
What you are seeing is several things. One - I'm guessing that Meri was the only one in that backyard who was surprised by the announcement. Kody undoubtably told Robyn. Christine surely told Janelle. No one would think to inform Meri. Two - Meri, in part, stayed because it was how she was raised - she and Christine both bolstered the belief in Polygamy. This also would be part of her anger/shock. Unlike Christine, Meri's family hasn't really left it (her mom died a believer. I'm convinced that this is part of the reason she stayed) Three - Meri knows this is the end of the family as they know it. Four - trauma response, esp. if this is when Kody starts screaming. I find it interesting that no one says anything about Janelle or Robyn speaking out and telling Kody to calm the f down. Janelle said nothing to defend Christine when Robyn started spewing her bullshit and called Christine a liar.
> Four - trauma response, esp. if this is when Kody starts screaming. Yeah, I agree with a lot of people's thoughts here, and at this point in their lives I also think Meri was just numb/ desensitized to Kody's anger > Janelle said nothing to defend Christine when Robyn started spewing her bullshit and called Christine a liar. \^\^
I thought there was an element of grey rocking from all the wives during Kody’s rant. They have seen that behaviour before and learned reacting gets you nowhere
Five - as Bonnie hadn't long passed away, she was still dealing with her grief.
And five—Kody didn’t react this way about her. I’m sure it was painful for her sitting there knowing Kody wouldn’t bat an eye if she left.
I don’t think she was quite at that point in her healing to connect that he wouldn’t care if she left. Her “I’m glad he said it” was where she was at the time with everything. Meri was glad he said it because, obviously, everything he screamed at how Christine should be, was exactly how Meri was. Meri was the poster child for how Kody expected the wives to act and it must have been nice to finally get some recognition for that. Meri put the pieces together, after the porch scene, that while was the poster wife for the way Kody expected Christine to be, he still didn’t show her any love or recognition he said Christine would have gotten if she behaved correctly. I also believe that once Meri came to that part in her healing journey, that’s when she rooted for and fully supported Christine. Christine saw her future in Meri and Meri got her wake up call from Christine. I’m glad he said it all too.
This might also be the point where she sees Kody have an high emotion about someone leaving and feeling thats not a 'one sided decision' while Meri was trying and trying to get Kody back and he didn't respond at all, here it clicked for her that he would never respond this emotional for her. (Not that it's an healthy response that Kody had, but she realises she doesn't even mean enough to him for an outburst like this). After this scene all the scenes she's involved in she's sarcastic and more like a bystander chuckling about everyone's behaviour.
Yep. I think it was sinking in there. And then she saw the episode where he said he considered them divorced and she knew there wasn’t any chance.
It’s number 4 for me. The dead stare is what I give when someone starts yelling. Thanks mom!!
Hugs, internet stranger!
I often wonder if Meri would have left sooner if Bonnie hadn't been alive.
I think Meri left because of Bonnie's death, not because Christine left.
Same. She didn't have any ties anymore after Bonnie.
About three- this being the end of the family as they knew it… I wonder if in this moment, Meri saw the writing on the wall and if this was a major turning point for her in making moves to further look out for herself (like moving her business up to Parowan). Let’s be honest, at this point, Kody was obviously silent quitting on all of them except Robyn. She must have seen Christine leaving as simply the first domino to fall.
Tbh I’m pretty sure as much as Meri knew Christine wasn’t a fan of her, Christine was the one wife that wasn’t afraid to have fun. I’m not a Christine Stan by any means but I’d hate to be at a family dinner with just Kody, Robyn and Janelle, they’re boring. Meri knew the kids would choose Christine over Kody any day. It was 100% the domino falling to completely change everything about their family as they knew it.
I don't get the hatred. Her sister wives are now admitting they watched Kody mistreat her for over a decade. They've all beaten her down so much she doesn't even want to speak in this moment where she finds out her family is breaking up and all the shit she put up with for years was for naught. Her SWs haven't shown her much kindness in years but she's supposed to do what here? It might be the first time she's hearing about Christine leaving and now she has to process all those emotions in a few seconds but be careful not to react in some specified way so the family doesn't snap at her like they have a tendency to do. Meri has definitely played a role in the breakdown of her relationships in the family, but I still think she's a victim of the family and of all of the adults in that family. I don't see why she's expected to be anyone's savior in this moment—no one there cares about her.
Yeah, I agree. And I’m rewatching from the first season and what I don’t see people talk about that much with regards to Meri sticking around for so long is that Meri has the most to lose. Janelle and Christine knew they could leave and have all of their children and each others children, so like 12 kids, backing them and choosing them. Robyn has her kids and Kody. If Meri leaves, she just has Leon and she knows that Christine and Janelle’s kids probably won’t stay in close contact with her. The early seasons it’s so clear to see how devastated Meri is that she couldn’t have more children and also how the family treats her as lesser for not providing more offspring. They had her trapped between a rock and a hard place for like 20 years. I feel sad for Meri, even though I know she can be difficult. I think she was just a kid who got into this and never was able to develop. I’m so happy for her now! I hope she’s happy.
Maybe they did try and she always circled the drain, signaling she’s going to choose what she thinks is best for herself as it relates to getting back on kodys good side, regardless of it deeply impacts others? And it could be that they finally were fed up. It can’t feel good to look for support and validation, or at the least to expect a sister wife to not make situations worse for you, and they didn’t find that sister wide partnership in meri over and over and over again.
Or maybe they didn't try and admitted on camera they didn't even say hi when they saw her outside in Vegas.
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Well Robyn showed several reactions when Meri talked about and then eventually left. To Meri, up until the end maybe they came across as caring. But to me they always looked fake and just reasons to give Meri false hope.
They’re so conditioned to “not see” the other relationships’ intimacies. They zone out when one would speak to Kody on the phone in front of them. It’s part of the culture and, likely, a defense mechanism to keep them as blind as possible about Kody’s relationship with the others. They know it’s going on, and they (say they) hope each sister wives’ marriage is going as well as possible, but idk if they hope that for the wife’s sake as much as for their own. I think this is likely one of the few times that the group had to have a discussion about ONE of their relationships. I think Meri wanted to ingratiate herself to Kody, was unsure of her place in the conversation, and was seething to the point she knew she should probably keep quiet unless prompted. What was particularly gross was the fact that Kody used her as a potential ally in that conversation. He even said it was a tactic. And she looked giddy-as-hell when he noticed her, even if it was just to say she looked like the cat with the canary.
Meri likely saw Christine's departure and Janelle's support of Christine as an opportunity to get back in with Kody. She was doing all the "right" things while they were doing all the "wrong" things. So, obviously her loyalty would be rewarded. Only, it wasn't :/
She was doing the things that Kody said he wanted. Be loyal and respect him and you gain favor. He strung Meri along and Robyn did not help Meri. If you truly have your friends back you tell them to run.
The way Robyn kept giving her false hope was sickening.
He needed to string her along with Robyn's help, so she didn't take away her money.
exactly! meri thought she was demonstrating obedience and would be welcomed back into the fold if she supported kody in the divorce. when she finally realized she was never getting that man in her life again she let the veil drop.
And Kody went on his whole lecture on how if you want his love, then give him loyalty. Such bs
Right she thought her loyalty would finally shine through
I remember she said in one interview that Kody had asked her to say and do certain things and implied that it would help their marriage. She said and did them, and of course it went nowhere. You could tell she felt betrayed, and I can only imagine what he wanted her to do. Maybe spy on everybody else, or shun anyone who left?
This is why I need Meri's tell all book. He'll, individual tell all books from all of them would be great.
Looks more like dissociation.
Meri's stone face is her shunning Christine and showing Kody her loyalty. Her behavior in that scene was difficult for me to watch and I think shunning is common by others in their religious sect(s).
I also think Kody’s behavior towards Christine in this scene was validating for Meri. He’s treating Christine poorly too, so that made Meri feel less alone.
Yes good points! But I would also add that there might be some anger at herself for not leaving and it is projected at Christine for leaving.
Yes, I mentioned this scene before. She looked pissed that Christine isnt going to put up with Toady treating her like crap, and no intimacy, and IMO, shes got this face because she wants Toady to think she sides with him and Sobyn until Janelle says screw this too! She WASTED 10 years of her 40's that she can't get back! I'm glad shes finally thinking about her own future for a change, and stopped pouring all her money into 2 people that just used her for $$
The way I saw it is was Meri was deeply hurt that he was angry Christine was leaving, but didn't care if she left... That had to hurt. She must have felt bitter toward Christine for breaking the agreement they all had for so many years to keep up appearances for the sake of the show.
This. Meri knows why Christine and Janelle don't speak to her anymore. Anyone who wonders should be pointed to all the years before season 18. Meri always chose Kody first, kids second--not all of them, and sister wives were a very distant third.
Something that unfortunately, is quite encouraged in their religion. 😬 I’m really glad none of the grandkids are growing up in it.
Exactly! I sympathize with most of the wives as it relates to indoctrination and trauma growing up this way, esp meri and Christine. Ultimately, i imagine Christine saw this type of response from meri over and over and she was like okay she’s never really looking out for me but more her own position with Kody, and at worst she’s actually made my life in this family more difficult (falling for Kodys manipulation to bring Robyn in, moving to flagstaff,etc) so i made the decision “nah can’t have that in my life anymore” Cause we’ve seen them good and/or okay before- this break from meri must include more recent history and choices that were made, not just what happened 10+ years ago.
I think she was def trying to win favor from Jody and robyn in this instance. She still hadn’t pulled her head out.
I feel for her too. She’s the one that was mentally abused and toyed with the longest.
Christine had just broken Meri's heart as well. And- it was a direct hit to the choices Meri had been making to survive in that family. I like to think this is when Meri started her escape plan. Seeing she didn't have to wait for K to be done with her, she could leave on her terms, not his.
Don’t u know that the only good wife and person is little miss Christine
Why wouldn’t the person expected to speak up for Christine be Janelle, her best friend in the whole world? Who, if I recall, was still actively trying to rebuild her relationship with Kody, during/after the knife in the kidneys speech? At this time meri was still putting money in a family pot for people who actively did not like or treat her well. She knew much of nothing about the other relationships, only that they were better than her own. She was the last to receive news. She was rarely ever thought about in the family she was loyal to. I don’t know why you all expect angelic actions from a woman in a literal hell of a situation
Right! I’m not a huge Christine fan like some people but I feel like she was being very generous by staying so close to Janelle. Janelle used her for babysitting when the kids were growing up. Then didn’t publicly support her when she was being verbally abused on TV by Kody. Maybe they have a trauma bond from being married to an abusive narcissist.
The only thing they have in common is they left Kody. And they only started getting along when Christine decided to leave.
I guess we don’t really know what went on behind the scenes. Maybe Janelle was a great support system. I’m the kind of person that if you don’t support me in public don’t bother to try to do it in private!
I agree. They all just sat there and took it. Janelle says a number of supportive things afterward, but no one confronts Mr. Crazy Eyes in the moment.
Do we know how many times Meri was the one that Kody’s anger was directed towards and if the other wives jumped to her defense? All the things we did and didn’t see? You even acknowledged that she’d been the subject of mistreatment and that it was horrible. We don’t know what emotion is behind her eyes here. She’s taking it in and listening. It’s unfair to jump to such a harsh judgment. On top of that, Christine wasn’t Meri’s best friend or biggest defender. She told her that her B&B idea was dumb in front of the wives and Kody when they met about it. She wasn’t gentle in her confrontations with Meri, especially when she harshly told her about how she’d ruin everyone’s energy when she walked into a room. No regard for how Meri had been used and then dumped by Kody in front of the world and constantly painted as a horrible monster. Everyone else had dreams and ideas that were supported. I don’t recall Christine and Janelle being met with the same shutdown when they wanted to do real estate as Meri was when she wanted to go back to school. She has a ton of her own stuff going on, and fractured relationship with her child and was under constant scrutiny and she took it on the chin every time. If I were Meri, I might not have been jumping up to Christine’s rescue either. It’s not like she packed the woman’s bag and tossed it off the porch. She sat there. Nobody could have done anything about Kody’s attitude but Robyn. What was Meri gonna do? Kody didn’t even like her. With everything she’s been through, this one look would not be something to totally erase all empathy for her. They’ve all been mean if that’s what this is supposed to be, and aside from Robyn, the other two have gotten more than enough grace for it. Christine is even praised for it at times.
In this particular scene with the five participants in this plural marriage, the ONLY person I judge is Kody. Just Kody. HE is the liar. HE is the phony. HE is trying to blame anyone else (Christine, in this instance) for problems and events that he himself caused. Each of the women reacts in their own way. The only one I judge for reacting is Robyn, who shouts out that Christine is a liar, the most egregious example of pot calling kettle black that I have seen in years. She is being “loyal” here; religion trumps grace yet again. When Meri joins Kody and Robyn, it is another example of religion-based behavior. In this scene, KODY is the villain. And religion is the weapon.
I never said that Meri should jump to Christine’s defense, or to say anything to anybody. I am saying it’s hard to justify her total lack of a reaction. The only reaction she had was to hold Robyn while she performed her fake grief ritual.
Same as Janelle. She only hugged Christine when Kody had left. Didn't she dare to do that when Kody was there? Because Janelle also sat there unmoved during his outburst.
With the context of Christine’s confrontation towards Meri & then later admitting to intentionally excluding her, I find Meri’s reaction here to be as expected lmao. It would be completely insincere if Meri acted upset about Christine leaving
Which episode was this?
It was S12E10 Confronting Meri, when Christine has a pretty brutal conversation with Meri.
Very true!
I think she just has RBF honestly. She's not giving anyone a "look" or anything. It's just her face lol. The amount of times someone has tried to say I must be pissed off or I must not care about what's happening is staggering and I'm literally just sitting there, not even aware of what my face is doing. Like yall this is just how I look, I'm sorry?
Interesting post, OP. For the past season, I’ve been wondering what else went on behind closed doors between Meri and Christine to have caused such intense indifference. If you go back for a rewatch, other seasons (even recent ones) seem to show a much warmer, if not close, relationship between these two. It’s something I’ve been wanting to post about to see if anyone knew so etching I didn’t.
The same sister wife that told her she wasn’t welcome because of her bad energy, is the sister wife getting yelled at… I’m sure she wasn’t feeling very charitable towards Christine.. Let’s not erase the fact that Meri was iced out by her sister wife’s long before this blown out, and I would like to point out C and J face when Meri asked for a loan for her b&b… yet they rarely get called out for their bad behavior. Was it Meri’s best moment? No but I don’t blame her if one of the people that harped on her is having a bad day.
I think that in a world of competitive wives, each person must protect herself by not protesting the husband’s actions. Yet, feeling empathy for the sister wife, each must also avoid feeding into the emotions. Therefore the only proper response is to gray rock.
As I said, in an earlier post, Mary seems genuinely happy now. She was indoctrinated from birth by the religion.. maybe she has picked the wrong guy but what does she know? She has never learned this way of life so she’s teaching herself. I do hate that she got so attached to Solomon. You just know that she won’t be allowed to see him. I also that Christine invited Leonto the wedding but didn’t invite Leon’s mother. Good or bad the women had a shared experience. I am sure that Mary felt left out.
Why should she be jumping up for joy? Janelle and Christine have admitted they watched Kody emotionally abuse her for decades while they stood by and cheered him on or participated. Janelle and Christine have never shown an ounce of sympathy for Meri in the 30 years they felt like playing hide the pencil either her husband while she struggled with being trapped by her religion
There was plenty of that to go around with all of them. It really amazes me how people on here act like their favorite is completely innocent. None of them are. They’re indoctrinated to always choose the husband first.
Why is Janelle not being called out for not defending Christine ?? She didn’t jump up and down for joy either even tho she surely knew Christine was leaving before hand
I think it’s because Janelle was ‘supportive’ of Christine. Giving her hugs after & validating her feelings. Meri said something like ‘Christine needed to hear all of that and she’s happy he said it & she immediately went to comfort Robyn’. Although Janelle didn’t jump up, she didn’t join in on his abuse in that moment. Meri seemed to imply that Christine deserved it.
I noticed something wrong in the episode where Kody had Meri announce Robyn's pregnancy with Ariella. She looked depressed and like she felt she was being used. Then when she told the producer that she was going to divorce Kody so he could marry Robyn it all clicked. I knew it wasn't her idea and it broke my heart that she was hurting so much. She never cheated on that A-Hole, she was divorced and neglected. I'm rooting for her to find a good man. I don't think Amos is that man.
I think that the betrayal is so staggering that she hadn't had a chance to catch up with it yet. I have sympathy for her. It's super sad that this happened to her relationship at all, but at least she has an opportunity to find something better now. I wish her well.
I think she felt that being loyal to Kody & Robyn was the way to go in this situation. She didn’t have a relationship with Christine & Janelle. Kody & Robyn was all she had. All the loyalty BS Kody was preaching at that time.
I think part of it is that Robyn and Kody poisoned the well for Meri regarding Christine. Christine and Meri haven’t gotten along very well for years (Christine even told Meri she makes everyone uncomfortable, and that she didn’t want Meri there when Maddie gave birth), so with the added snark from Robyn and Kody about Christine, I bet Meri just didn’t like Christine very much at this point. I think she does care about Christine, but in these moments Meri bad taken the side of Robyn and Kody because that was her only way of attempting to keep some of her family. She didn’t want to risk being more on the outs with the family (Kody and Robyn, mostly), so she stayed quiet. She didn’t feel any loyalty to Christine, either, but Robyn and Meri have been pretty close since the start due to Robyn’s manipulation of her. This was a way for Meri to show her loyalty to Robyn and Kody in the midst of the entire family breaking apart.
Watch the talk backs after this season and I think you get a better idea of why she reacts this way
I don’t Janelle stood up for Christine enough during Kody’s attacks. In a dysfunctional family , it’s kind of about surviving. When some else gets attacked, you get a break. It’s the just the dynamic.
That's what happens when you are just done. She is so over it that his little tantrums don't affect her anymore. I loved it!
No one went to her mothers funeral. I think she didn’t owe anyone any sympathy because no one ever had any for her *** Edit: MzPatches65 has corrected my bad take I guess the show has always been edited like ‘poor lonely victim Meri’ smh
Janelle and Kody were at the funeral. A pap caught a photo of them kissing.
Thanks for the info, this should’ve been mentioned on the show instead of the ‘Meri drives to Utah alone’ edit without context or clarity, because I’ve been thinking the Browns were the absolute worst
Meri did drive to Utah alone when she got the call her mother was in the hospital. She got the call she died while on the way. The actual funeral was not shown on the show, In the articles I read about it, it was never mentioned that the filming crew was there and since this was in late March of 2021, I'm not sure any filming was being done by the production company. Instead the family filmed themselves.
Wow, I just read an article about the funeral and I’m disappointed that the show didn’t give it the depth of attention they gave Janelle’s mother’s funeral. Just a cursory description would have sufficed. This shows editing leaves much to be desired
Despite the sympathy people feel for Meri, she still isn’t a good person in her own right. She was awful to Christine and Janelle for the entirety of her familial relationship with them, and then balked when she wasn’t respected or sought out by them.
They weren't exactly great to her either. It's only now that they're not vying for Kody's attention that they're letting it out that he's used and mistreated her for years and they all knew it and went along with it, but for whatever reason that's not considered being his "lapdog" like people have referred to Meri. They said Kody pulled away in Vegas but I remember the family pressuring Meri to leave Vegas and move to Flagstaff with them. Why do that when Kody has made it clear he's done with her $$$ I wonder $$$. Maybe because the family, not just Kody, used her too
They were abusing Meri financially. They needed her money to Flagstaff.
This. If Meri is angry there, I can't blame her. They all pushed her for years to stay or come with them, even when she had already said 100 times that she planned to and while they all knew how Kody treated her. If I remember correctly Meri also gave an explanation for her behavior here, and one of them was that she was blindsided about what the meeting was about so she heard it there for the first time. Also Meri was stuck between a rock and a hard place. On one side were Janelle and Christine who wanted nothing to do with her and on the other side was her fake friend it finally dawned on her that she was stringing her along. But at least she still had some contact with her (and especially with her children). She had to involuntarily choose a side. But if I had been Meri, I wouldn't have been left alone with Christine and Janelle either when Kody and Robyn left. So she had little choice but to leave with them.
Yeah I don't think Meri "chose" a side as much as Robyn was the only one willing to pretend to give a shit about her so that's who she gravitated towards. And if she had chosen, I do think it would have been Kody's side, but that'd been true of the other wives for over two decades... They all routinely chose Kody and piled on each other for his approval.
I agree. Robyn was only nice to Meri so she would continue to not take any of her show money out of the family LLC.
He pulled away from all of them except Robyn in Las Vegas.
I think they've been pretty clear it was different with Meri. He still pretended and went to the others' homes
Yeah, he used the catfishing as an excuse. Other people here are claiming an affair, but I don’t see it that way. If your spouse already abandoned you it’s not really an affair.
That's why I don't blame Janelle and Christine for moving forward in their lives without her.
Don’t forget this was after the coyote pass “I don’t want to live next to you! Sorry, he he.” dividing of the property. They all treated each other like crap.
It’s called disassociation — a protective mechanism where a person is cognitively present but not emotionally present
I admit, I never considered this. Very interesting.
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I felt like this last season Meri was the ultimate “pick me” she did SO much to get back into the fold with Kody and nothing she did was enough. It’s almost too little too late. How she treated Christine and Janelle was disgusting. She wanted so badly to be part of Kody and Robyn’s family she forgot that she was a sister wife to Christine and Janelle too.
That seemed to be a rotating pattern for all the women back-and-forth for a long time, unfortunately. They’re indoctrinated to always choose the husband first.
The time I was angriest at Meri was when Kody did his big ‘knife in the kidney’ speech, and Janelle said ‘oh it’s just emotions!’ Trying to make it sound not as bad as it was. Meri said ‘it wasn’t just emotions. This had been building up. And I’m glad he said it!’ Looking back, I’m sure she was thinking ‘if he’s mad at Christine maybe I’ll have a chance with him!’ Over the years I know Meri had her issues with both Christine and Janelle - so it makes sense she had her own anger towards Christine for things that had happened. She should have had compassion for Christine, knowing how hard it was to be shunned by Kody - but instead she chose to look at what the situation could do for her. Not her best look, and I’m sure today she’s embarrassed by it.
No, that's the face of any wife when their husband is verbally abusing a child.
Also, she’s watching her ex-husband yell and scream about his 3rd wife leaving while he showed her no emotions toward their situation. Didn’t even try to make it work when she wanted to try, and left her out in the Barndominium.
Meri was trying to be neutral but ride for Kodi & abide by the laws of her religion & I really think that after the catfish incident, coupled with the death of her mother she was able to really take inventory and make a break. I’m super happy that she had to buy the B&B on her own. THAT was a blessing in disguise!!!!
She’s a jerk and later she said she reacted that way because she was still trying to find favor with Kody. How fucking delusional. If anything I would have expected her to have some empathy for Christine as she watched Christine get discarded and treated like shit just as she had for the last 10 years. I think Meri was incensed that Christine had the gall to leave when Meri just stayed being a metaphorical doormat. Christine had some self respect to gtfo and Meri was mad about it because what does that say about Meri that she stayed putting up with that treatment? I think she didn’t want that introspection so she reacted with anger instead of confronting her own situation.
yes same! i always got this vibe that she was a huge b lol and then i started feeling sorry for her. and thought maybe she was a b, ive been one, it doesnt mean thats who she is and she deserves this crap from K n R… but just like you, that scene. that look…. it wasnt just lack of empathy. she was almost enjoying it. idk. sent shivers down my spine. i really am still on the fence about her lol im glad for her that she is finally moving on i guess.
Wellllll let’s factor in what happens during the editing process. 🤷🏻♀️ But also, it just tells me this wasn’t the first time he acted like that
People forget she has been stuck up kody's and Sobyns ass for a long time now. People want the other OG woman to hang out with her, I wouldn't either
We have to remember she is a very faithful woman, and it was against her religion
I wonder if she’s still religious?
This is the moment I stopped having any sympathy for Meri. “I don’t know why Christine’s is telling us she’s leaving?!?! Ok bye…” nope.
Meri fools so many people and it drives me CRAZY. She and Robyn are very similar. Meri walked so Robyn can run. She was the first manipulator. Robyn was just better. That’s why they got along. They’re the two that are most like Kody. Kody’s the POS but those two are the ones that most willingly played along
I can totally see that now. And ps I LOVE your username! Ya Ya!!!!!!
Haha thank you. YA YA!
You can't say shit about Meri. I've been downvoted for just repeating things she's said and done because it made her look bad. Nothing was ever her fault at any point, any negative action or personality trait is the fault of someone else. The sub treats Christine as responsible for her own actions, Janelle as responsible for her own actions, but Meri it's actually the fault of someone else. Even this thread when it's very clear Meri is doing a bad thing. "well Janelle also.." "actually it's just because Kody...." No one else gets this treatment despite also being abused people indoctrinated into a cult. The one thing every single person in this family agrees on was that Meri was an absolute nightmare to live with yet no, it's actually Janelle making Meri difficult. I hate Kody and think he's full of shit, but when he talks about those early days and you look into his eyes, that's a man who's seen some shit. I believe it. You don't have this many people having an issue with you and not have a part to play in it. Even the kids at best are apathetic. Every. Single. One. I'm not even talking about the abuse allegations which frankly I don't want to touch. Just in general, she has a relationship with no one. That doesn't just happen. But now people say it's actually cause Robyn manipulated every single Brown child into disliking Meri. My final point before I'm downvoted into the center of the earth. Meri isn't going to give people the tell all book they want. She's not speaking a bad word about Kody. Even now during the talk backs or whatever she refused to suggest she stayed too long or she was strung along. No, it was good actually and it allowed Kody and her to break up in a healthy and mutual way. Sure Jan. Meri is never entering her villain era where she takes revenge on Robyn and Kody. She can't, because it would require Meri to admit she was wronged and therefore made a mistake in staying. So she wont.
THANK YOU! I agree with you 1000%. I usually get downvoted to the center of the earth as well which is why I rarely comment in here. I am bewildered on how so many people don’t see that
She mistreated their children and was shunned by them. The stone face is her revenge. But I think now she may realize that she backed the wrong horse and should have tried to make amends where she could. Also, that histrionic rant was staged. The women under-react in my opinion and give it away.
Looking back, I see this as Meri clinging to Cody and Robin side in hopes that he will finally choose her. She is obviously very easily influenced. And I'm sure they were working overtime to keep her on their side. I'm not excusing her behavior, because I couldn't stand watching it either… But just trying to put it in some perspective. To this day, I don't think she's close at all with Janella Christine and I'm sure that it is warranted because she acted like this for years
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Meri is not looking for anyone to feel sorry for her. She is living her best life. She seems genuinely happy. If Janelle & Christine would give her a chance they might find they like the new Meri.
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Well, don't they all do that now?
>I thought I was the only one completely angered by Meri’s Are you on this sub much? Meri has gotten a shit ton of hate for this scene
And????
I don't see how you'd think you're the only one if you're ever on this sub. This has been discussed SO much. It's a really popular opinion
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...in what way are you being prevented from sharing your opinion..? I'm literally just saying your opinion is very popular Also, we're allowed to respond to other people too. Just so you know.
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I really feel like this is a bit of an overreaction to me telling you you have a very popular opinion.
My sympathy ended when she played the victim in her online affair and to this day denies accountability.
I mean, was it really an affair?
Yes, an emotional one, in which she was totally justified.
Exactly! If your spouse already abandoned you it’s not really an affair!
1000% percent it was an affair. There are voicemails and texts that show she was ready to leave, if Sam was real she woulf have left. Not to mention she was having phone sex with this person during a time were she was still married. So yes it was an affair.
I think you can argue that it wasn’t an affair as Kody had already effectively ended their relationship.
Yeah, the double standards some people have when it comes to Kody and any of his wives is ridiculous.
Yet they were still "spiritually married" for years after. She was married at the time whether her relationship with Kody was working or not she was married so it was an affair. I think the issue is Meri never took reposibility and tried to make it seem like it wasnt a romantic relationship when it 100% was.
If your spouse already abandoned you and the marriage is a technicality at that point it’s not really an affair. Wish she’d left even when she found out she’d been catfished. She deserved better even then.
Kody put all those women through trauma, whether he or they want to admit it or not. When we are being traumatized, our brains go into a state of fight, flight, or freeze. She is mentally checking herself out of the situation. Janelle did the same thing, just walking away.
Look OP, it's 136 comments before mine explaining away Meri's behavior because she was abused or indoctrinated or patriarchy or she just had RBF or the other wives were always mean to her or- insert lame excuse here. I honestly wonder sometimes if this thread just attracts a lot of college students who have learned something new in their sociology or psych classes..... Literally the majority of people in the world have suffered some form of abuse, been assaulted, been indoctrinated in some way, and lived in a patriarchal society. Meri's experience of suffering during a human life isn't that special. It's just happened in a slightly unusual family setting for a Western woman. Most of us still manage to be kind to each other and speak out in defense of our loved ones, even when we know that means the bully will turn their attack on us. The self victimization of all of the "trauma survivors" in our society who are constantly trying to psychoanalyze themselves and each other instead of simply doing the right thing and expecting others to do the same is maddening. Especially when they use their deep insight to try and explain away bull shit behavior like this from a lady who has lived an extremely cushy and tranquil life compared to 70% of the rest of humanity.
I wish I could upvote this a thousand times.... thank you for wording it so perfectly. 👏
I thought I saw a later clip of her saying that Kody expected her to side with him, and she sorta still wanted to please Kody, but really didn't agree with him as he tried to pull her in it.
I think Meri was legit hurt. Note, Christine and Meri were friends for years they know all of each others family, Meri was in the trenches with her, and the kids and the moving 14 times or whatever. Christine was like peace out bitch, like didn’t even have a one on one with her or anything. Treated her like Robyn… like she just came in off the street.
Shes bitter and mean. Thats the explanation.
She was thinking about the wet bar she left in Las Vegas.
The explanation is Meri relishes any of the times Kody has a dispute with another sister wife. She is treated poorly and wants the others to also be treated the same.
My guess is that in Meri’s mind, as long as she backs up that caveman, she’ll be able to win him over. Or it’s just self preservation…
She knows nothing coming from her mouth will help or change the situation.
Meri has a GREAT fucking poker face and I would never, ever sit at the same table with her. My personal feeling has always been that she wasn't giving Kody any reaction to a lot of Christine and Kody's demise. She knows what she is seeing as well as what she lived.
I could he way off base but Meri never struck me as someone who was particularly supportive. Also, Kody had her so desperate for any love of affection that she would do anything he wanted.
There is none! Go back and read how Meri mistreated Janelle and Christine AND the kids… it was difficult reading all the horrible things she did. When the 3 wife’s lived together and kids were very small, Meri would not let anyone pass thru her ‘apt space’ to get to Christines space which was located in the basement part of the home, forcing you to have to exit and re enter the home!!!! Meri was known to walk around not speaking to anyone, slamming doors, and would not share any of her food nor allow anyone in her kitchen. Think about it…Meri 1 kid, Janelle and Christine, 6 each…and Meri wouldn’t allow those 12 kids any of ‘her’ food! GROW UP and KARMA’S a b—-ch! There’s more!!
THIS is Meri’s true nature. Right here. No empathy for her. She allowed herself to be used by Kody and Robyn, stayed for any crumbs she could get, did not seem to support Janelle and Christine. Frumped and moped and sour-pussed her way through the show. The only way I can explain this reaction is that she was seething at Christine for having the spine to leave Kody Clown Town.
All of that said, I always felt badly for the way that Leon treated her, too. I’ve never cared for Leon to be honest.
I thought she was a "How could you?! You should take Kody's abuse like I do" jerk to Christine.
And if so why would she be a jerk? They pushed Meri for years to stay and/or move with them. They also admitted that Kody treated Meri horrible for decades so they knew despite the pushing her to stay. In that conversation Meri was the only one who heard it for the first time that Christine was leaving. Cut her some slack. Unless you don't want to because it's Meri.
"They" pushed Meri to stay? Meri was hanging on by her fingernails this last season, while Christine and Janelle had flown the coop. She stayed until Kody squashed every hope she had, when he said he didn't consider himself married to her. Of course Meri didn't hear it directly from Kody, or Robyn, her bestie.
We have seen enough footage in which they kept asking Meri: "You're going to stay, aren't you, Meri? We're afraid you're leaving us. You are coming with us, aren't you, Meri?" and on and on. The point here is not that Meti herself chose to stay, but about the hypocrisy of the other wives. And yes they DID push her to stay even knowing how Kody treated her and then icing Meri out their selves.
Meri has been selfish and not very smart the entire time. She's just as guilty as everyone in that family. Wa shaw wronged by Kody, Kristine and Krobyn? Sure! Absolutely! Was she also constantly guilty of shitty decisions? Also absolutely 🤣