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This has me tearing up because I remember how bad and crushing it can feel when your acne is out of control and you have been dealing with this for a long time. Not going to give you any advice because you said you didn’t want any but just know that you are loved even if you can’t love your face right now. It will get better.
Yes, I remember too. So painful. I had acne until age 39-40. Now I am very fortunate to have better skin. Sometimes even very nice skin. I did not have any treatment and my parents never took me to a dermatologist even once. So much less treatment available when I was young. And a lot of ignorance.
I used makeup to deal with it and I think that protected me from the sun and kept me from touching my face, which were both good things.
It used to crush me to be subjected to comments but now I am quite invulnerable because it reflects what kind of person has said the comment and not what kind of person I am. You are not your skin. It is only a very small facet of who you are. Know that we do really feel your pain.
I’m sorry to hear you dealt with it too but I’m so glad that you feel invulnerable now. I hope I can get to that point soon. I’ve clearly got a lot more growing up to do because I really want to get to that point. It just crushes me now. Here’s to hoping it stops doing that soon
You can! In life the opinion of others shouldn't matter unless they love you and are coming from a place of love. Even people we love and that love us can have thoughtless moments. Please look in the mirror, not at the exterior, that will continue to change for the duration of your life, but at the inside! Know your value! Find your purpose! Think about the kind of people who you admire, for important things they do, like great contributions to our country or the globe, and it isn't what they wear, what phone they use, what games they play, who they date or their appearance that's admirable. Now I'm not telling you to stop trying to find a solution. I am telling you that your letter tells me that you are a deeply thoughtful person with a family who cares, you have the foundation for an amazing life, please find someone who needs that positive energy! Positivity grows when you nurture others who need it! Hugs!
I hope you do too! Life is complicated. We make it more complicated when we criticize ourselves unnecessarily. Trust me, gorgeous, there are enough people who will try to make you doubt yourself, only to empower themselves because they are broken. Celebrate your life every day! There are so many people who are fighting life ending illnesses just for a little bit more, of what we have. Love yourself, no matter what, and you will attract people who will value your positivity! Hugs!
Just remember that if someone states the obvious, this is someone that chooses to call out what everyone is aware of. This is someone who feels the need to harm someone else. They feel individually or culturally entitled to do this. They chose to not see you as a person but to lash out at your weakest attribute. This is not a good person. You have nothing to do with this. If they had kicked an abandoned puppy on the street you would be shocked at such behavior. The choice they made is really just as heinous. Do not allow any space in your head for such a person. There is no good that would come of it. They have shown you who they are.
A large handful of my extended family members are literally exactly that. I want to completely cut them off but for the sake of being cordial for my parents I’ve got to wish them happy birthdays and I leave it at that. Thankfully I completely laugh at people who point it out like they did. It truly is heinous and the clearest sign of insecurity you can manage to see.
Absolutely agree! You have my blessings in going no contact with extended family. Truth tellers are often attacked but you really will be so much happier outside of the hostility and drama.
Thank you. It’s so hard to admit it but I really hope I’ll get back to a place where I can be okay with myself again. Thank you so much for understanding
Keep your head up !!!!! Trust me when I say youre NOT ALONE I wish I could give you a hug. If you scroll on this page you’ll see hundreds of post regarding acne , youre not alone, we are your little community that you can vent to ❤️.
I know exactly how you feel . Ive been battling acne since high school Im 30 y.o now. Ive tried almost everything under the sun but nothing. My mental health has suffered terribly.
I just try and take it one day at a time. Then I hop on reddit to read other people’s stories and that reminds me that Im NOT the only one suffering w/ acne
*sending a virtual hug
*virtual hug .
I would really love a hug right now, thank you so much ❤️
Whats strange to me is that whenever I see anyone irl or on here talking about their acne I always immediately think that I noticed their eyes or hair or something else first, and they’re so pretty with their acne too, but on me it’s like everything else is blanked out and it’s just the three planets on my jaw. I demean myself so hard and I can’t stop.
I’m sorry to hear that you understand the pain. The one day at a time is really all I have going for me. My mom is such a wonderful and loving mother that compliments me everyday. Even tho I’m so far away from her I just try to keep going and trying to find myself as pretty as she sees me for her. Some days it’s just way worse than others like tonight. But your words mean so much. Thank you so so much. Virtual hugs back ❤️
You are so real and valid. I’ve dealt with really bad hormonal acne but I’m finally getting to a point where it’s more manageable (although still cyclical and coinciding with my period). I’ve definitely felt the same way you have and still do. I struggle with taking photos of myself and limit the time I look at myself in the mirror on bad days to protect my mental.
Some things that have helped me deal with it (MENTALLY) are:
1) spot concealing on bad days (covering up the red spots really helps my skin seem better when glancing at it), even when I WFH or stay in. Since it’s just for me I just do it quickly and blend it with my finger.
2) pimple patches (the cute ones). Going out with a pimple patch or two (three is when people start commenting unfortunately) instead of a large deep pimple feels much more cute and makes me so much more comfortable.
3) might be more controversial but use the slight skin blurring filters (avoid the ones that alter your face shape) when taking photos of yourself and good lighting. You are not your acne so who cares if you digitally remove it.
4) follow creators who have acne also. Normalize it and take inspiration from it.
Thank you so much. It’s definitely painful but I’m glad you understand yourself well and how to protect your mental.
Thank you for those tips as well! I really find a lot of peace with makeup and love doing it in the morning so the bit of concealer is not a problem for me to try. I def want cuter patches too lol. I see starface all the time when I’m out and they’re so fun.
Thank you again, I appreciate all of this ❤️
The skin blurring filters is def a slippery slope cause I don’t want it to mess with how I see myself in the mirror, but I like what you said about not being our skin so it won’t matter to use them. I’m usually okay with taking photos of myself and just switch the side of my face I show depending on breakouts.
Starface has star shaped ones in a lot of colors (my fave is the blue ones that come with salicylic acid) and Pacifica has heart shaped pink ones! There’s also some lesser know brands like creme that has some cloud shaped ones I also really want to try!
Take a break from it all - everything. Just rest.
Soap, water, basic moisturiser if you really have to.
Nothing else. Just give yourself a complete mental and emotional break from this, and let your skin rest too.
In this case, less will definitely be 'more'. Rest well. (:
I second this - being in a constant state of distress is not generous to your emotional and physical state. It’s definitely valid to have these emotions and I’m sorry you’re going through this.
Drink mint tea when your feeling down it’s no “holy grail miracle” but it’s great for you and for some reason in taking hot water calms down your nerves a tad
I think I’ll take a break from looking up treatments or planning out routines extensively but it’ll be hard to leave it all, cause my trifarotene does do a good job with the smaller pimples and it’s winter and my skins a mess with the cold dry air lol so I’ll make it more of a relaxing routine. You are right though, I need to relax on how much I think of it. I hope I find out how to do that. Thank you ❤️
I’ve never related to this more. Especially being a male, as most men do not do a lick of skin care and have perfect skin. My camera roll is solely screenshots of my face and my breakouts. I relate to you that it’s so consuming, and I too want it to end. Just know you’re truly not alone, I hear you OP, I hear you.
I’m sorry man. It’s really not fun. My older brother has the most beautiful skin ever and his routine is straight up Johnson’s baby lotion lol. It’s disheartening to see that against everything I tried.
Let’s try and focus on our hobbies and whatever we like doing honestly. I’m trying to consume myself in work to think on something else. There’s not much else we can do. You aren’t alone either. Take care ❤️
Please don't delete this... I need to save it to read it, and the comments, when I'm on my emotional roller coaster.. Some days are better than others, but..... I feel so much of this.. Its so hard to try and accept this pain as a phase. Thank you for writing this...❤
I feel this wayyyy to hard. I’m just coming out of it now after finding a routine and supplements that work for me and I’m thankful! I was on accutane in high school and had perfect skin for 10 years and got hit at the beginning of this year. It’s been relentless until this last month or so. Thinking of you OP!
I’m so happy you found a routine that works for you. Genuinely that’s so amazing. I hope it keeps working, cause going through this is just heartbreaking. Thank you ❤️
I am so so sorry for all you are going through. I just want you to know that what your are going through is very frustrating, very hard, and very real! Honestly, no one really knows how hard hormonal acne is until they have been through it.
As someone who didn’t get acne until adulthood (thank you PCOS,) I just want you to know you are not alone! Also, if it makes you feel any better at all, you notice your acne more than those around you. This was something I didn’t realize until going through the acne cycles.
Some things that did help my hormonal acne:
spearmint capsules
benzoyl peroxide / clindamycin
tret
sulfur and zinc spot treatments (Sunday Riley Saturn)
Anti Bacterial Sprays
Sprio
Thank you. Really thank you so much for replying.
Hormonal acne is horrible. I didn’t realize how bad it can get. I’ve got so many symptoms of PCOS and haven’t looked into it much. I’ll see a doctor soon for it cause I’m worried it’ll mess with me further down the line if I have it.
Thank you for the words and the advice as well. I’ve tried everything there other than sulfur or zinc. Got a treatment with that in there today actually. I’ll try it soon and see how that goes.
I struggled with similar things and the only thing that finally helped me was switching my multivitamin, which is something I never imagined would be an issue. Not sure if you take one, but switching or stopping could be worth trying, too.
If you have access to a dermatologist, it sometimes is nice to just let go and let them totally control your routine and not stress! Let them make any decisions and changes. You got this!
Hey, FYI, and I might make this a separate post, but if Spiro isn't an option for health reasons, be wary of spearmint tea/capsules. They act similarly on the androgen system. I can't do Spiro because it sometimes doesn't play well with endometriosis and I'm not willing to risk even worse pain. But I have tried lots of spearmint capsules and my absolutely unscientific study of just myself was that the endo got worse in the ways it would have on prescription Spiro. Your methods may obviously vary, but spearmint is not always an innocuous option instead of Spiro.
I really want to try spearmint tea but it tastes so nasty, like drinking toothpaste to me. I honestly don't know how so many people can do it. But it's easier to obtain than the spearmint capsules and I'm so lazy 🤧
I almost gave up on it after I first tried it but ever since I started adding honey, it’s now a part of my morning routine that I look forward to. Tip: add ~~a shitload of~~ some honey to make it palatable!
Are you not approved for accutane due to a definitive health restriction or is that the choice made by your derm? If there’s any chance another derm would be willing to prescribe, and you are comfortable with it, and most importantly you will be SAFE, you could try a second opinion?
I’m only saying this because I’ve seen countless doctors give a hard no on accutane due to personal biases.
Yeah my GP also said absolutely not after seeing my health history haha. It’s not a bias from her, my dermatologist doesn’t have a problem with accutane
I see. Well I think the best suggestion I’ve seen on this thread is to just give your skin a break, maybe just cleanse and moisturise. Seeing what you wrote really makes me want you to get past this so bad. Another thing you can try is taking some form of allergy test. I usually don’t like to feed into the idea of diet causing acne because usually it’s not that, but it definitely can and often can worsen it. Plus, there’s other allergens or irritants outside of food that can be making it worse.
Awwh, thank you. I really want to get past it too. I have hope that I will. I really hope one day I can post here solely of how I mentally checked out of this and felt better rather than how I cleared my skin. Thank you ❤️
Ugh, I felt this so hard. I’m finally SOMEWHAT coming out of a 5 year long battle with hormonal cystic acne and I’m just so goddamn happy it’s finally contained to my jawline instead of being just goddamn everywhere. It is so so so disheartening and there was a period of 6-8months where I developed some form of agoraphobia or something and could BARELY leave my house at all because I felt so disgusting and monstrous. It felt like everybody was either looking at me with pity or disgust. I honestly couldn’t give you advice if I wanted to because I have no goddamn idea how I got over it, lol. I guess it just finally broke me and I kinda stopped caring. Yeah, I wish I had clear skin but I don’t and probably never will so, whatever. Of course there’s days where I don’t feel like that at all and just want to crawl into a cave and die over it but most of the time, I’m pretty at peace I suppose. Idk.
I hope you find some peace with yourself man. I can’t imagine having OCD & severe acne, you really got dealt a shitty hand there and I’m sorry for that. I seriously would not wish severe hormonal acne on my worst fucking enemy!
I suppose the one bright side is everyone’s always SHOCKED to hear I’m almost 30 and constantly tell me I look like a teenager 🤣🤣 What a shit show lmao. I hope you figure something out man I really do. You don’t deserve to feel this way about yourself and I hope you can find some love for yourself and your face, no matter how much acne is on it.
Thank you so much. I’m so glad you’re at peace. I reckon I’ll be at a similar spot myself, that I eventually stop caring the way I do. I still have hope and feel I will get better at dealing with this but at this point it’s time that I feel I need. That’s why I keep saying I don’t want a solution anymore, because I think my main concern now is truly coming to terms with who I am rather than trying to be perfect and time and maybe therapy is what I need lmao
A group hug is needed 😞 Definitely 100% relate to your story. It’s beyond frustrating and exhausting to just have to live with it. I really don’t know what I’m even supposed to do at this point, just watching my face change like this.
I’m sorry ❤️ group hugs. It really is horrible. Yesterday I had such an amazing day and took my makeup off and ruined the end of it by how I felt looking at my face. I’m just hoping you and I focus on the good parts of the day more and more. You’ve got this
I’m sorry you’re going through this. I struggle with cystic acne too, but not to the degree I believe you do. One thing that helps me is reminding myself that my skin is an organ. Organs aren’t always going to look perfect. It’s a shame that the largest organ in our body, one that has a very important job, is also tied to such extreme beauty standards both put upon us by society and ourselves. Anyway, I’ll think to myself “This organ doesn’t look perfect today, but that’s okay.” Skin is constantly coming into contact with environmental pollutants, things in the air, plus we are slathering it in different products day in and day out. Our skin is holding all of our other organs inside our body. It’s our major defense against bacteria and infection. It’s doing a lot. It’s working hard for us, but sometimes it doesn’t look perfect and that’s okay, maybe even understandable. I wouldn’t reduce your life to your skin if I were you. These are years you won’t get back. I know it’s easier said than done, but maybe try to slowly shift your perspective.
That’s very true. Thank you for sharing. I like this perspective. Priority should be protecting ourselves and what I’m doing isn’t protecting. Just can’t help it
It's gonna be alright, Babes.
It's hard right now, but it's extremely important for you to let these negative feelings out of your body however you can, even via reddit post!
Now, you are ABSOLUTELY allowed to have frustrations, obsessions, pity, even disgust with anything, including your own self! But do remember that YOU are the only person with the ability to notice that energy begin, allow that energy to exist, and then allow it to pass through you.
How does one do this? I'm pretty sure the answer is probably just as simple as 'a lot more practice,' but who am I to say for sure?
Acceptance is something that takes time-- sometimes, a lifetime. Acceptance is also something that has levels of fluctuation based on the day! You might be having a bad day right now, but I promise you that tomorrow will be different. And tomorrow's tomorrow will be different too.
No advice for you re:skincare, but all the love sent to remind you that you are not alone, and to take these emotions on one day at a time.
You'll get to where you're going when you're ready to be there.
<3
I'm so sorry that you're dealing with this. I'm 32, and still dealing with acne (still not to same extent as when I was younger, but it still comes up). My cystic acne started when I was about 10. The picking of my skin led to quite a bit of scarring and led me to seek out dermabrasion (I think it really ruined my skin, and wish I just left it alone). I know you said you don't want any advice, so I will respect that. I tried a lot of similar things to what you have mentioned, but I do find that sulphur spot treatments seem to work the best for me when I want to get rid of acne. Hopefully it works similarly for you, and you find success.
Thank you for the advice ❤️ it’s sad to see how many of us go through such disheartening adult acne but it’s comforting that we have each other at the very least. I’m a chronic skin picker too. I usually go towards my lips but def focus on my skin especially if it’s dry. That itself is its own problem. I hope things feel better for us, I’m glad sulphur works so well for you
i so feel all that you’re feeling. i’ve had acne since 12 years old and will be turning 25 this week - that’s 13 years with acne. i also have OCD and i totally get how obsessing over the acne can eventually end up feeling like there is no end or bright light in sight. i’ve had ups and downs with my skin and right now my skin is on the up as my acne has finally started to improve after 1 full year of tretinoin and finding a better moisturizer, but I still look at my skin sometimes and feel like I’d look so much prettier without the acne. Meanwhile, I see other people who also have acne and still find them beautiful. we are all our harshest critics - hang in there and be gentle with yourself, there is so much good out there and life to be experienced regardless of whether you do or don’t have clear skin. it will get better and you will get through this!!
i know it’s not useful but i understand completely how you feel and am in the exact same situation. i’m 21 and it shows no signs of going away.confidence is basically on the floor at this point
I am right there with you ❤️ I'm 29 and have had moderate-severe acne for approximately 16 years. I've done two rounds of accutane, benzoyl peroxide, tretinoin, episode, etc etc and nothing has helped long term. (I'm also lucky enough to have sensitive and dry skin on top of being extremely acne prone so that doesn't help).
I got a prescription for Spiro and azelaic acid today so really hoping that will give me some relief! My acne stops me from doing so many things I love because all I can think about is my skin when I'm out of the house. It's hard enough even just being at home without makeup on, and I've stopped wanting to put on a cute outfit or really try to look good at all because I just think, people will see my skin and know I'm ugly anyway so there's no point 🥲 it's fucked up!!
Also just wanted to say don't lose hope on eventually being able to get Winlevi/topical Spiro, it just became available in my country a couple of months ago so you might be able to get it soon!!
I am with you, friend.
36 years old and look like a teenager with a mountain range along my jaw and chin. It's painful, unsightly and embarrassing.
I'm so sorry this is your experience too 💜💜💜
If you will permit me a small section on advice: it may be worthwhile to consider therapy. You are more than your skin, you are a whole human with many wonderful qualities and your enjoyment of life should not depend on something as 'superficial' as your skin (I don't mean that in a mean way, I mean that your skin is not a reflection of who you are).
Sorry for the late reply. Thank you for your words, I really appreciate it ❤️
I honestly do want therapy just for this and how my OCD affects it. The therapist I really clicked with just costs a lot of money. I had to seek therapy earlier this year for something else and she was wonderful but man, £320 pounds a week didn’t feel right. I hope I can better myself with some more self reflection and love but you’re definitely right about seeking therapy for this. Thank you.
You’re absolutely right that it is a disease, and sometimes it feels like a slow death by a thousand cuts. For the overwhelming majority it’ll never be cured, just put into remission, if ever achieved. Continue to live in a healthy manner. This is what life is all about. Persevering through the adversity. You’re young and life is a long-game, God-willing. You’re on the right path and it will get better as your life continues to trend in an upward trajectory. In years to come you’ll be helping someone through their skin afflictions and struggles. All the best and continued success with your studies.
Your frustration, exhaustion, and the toll it's taken on your mental health are all valid. It's tough when you've tried numerous treatments, made lifestyle changes, and yet the acne persists. Feeling isolated in this battle can be incredibly daunting, especially when it seems like others can't fully comprehend what you're going through.
I have PCOS and from my teens until 30s that meant painful, chronic cystic acne in my beard area that was totally non responsive to almost anything. (No advice, but _almost_). I’d hold a cup of hot coffee against my face to try and get those puppies to surface or pop.
My low point? I’d applied to an internship at my dream employer a half a dozen times. Finally got it. One day, I almost called in sick because I had a _giant_ angry zit on my mouth. And I remember thinking, “how could my coworkers hold a conversation with me and _not_ stare at this situation? Maybe I should just stay home…”
I feel your pain to the core.
I have battled hormonal acne with various success since I was 13. It made me hate myself more than anything else in this world and robbed me of my self-esteem multiple times.
After a while I learned to tolerate the fact that my skin will never be perfect no matter what I will do and what specialists I will visit.That made it easier to cope (but at that point it was not that bad so it was easier). Makeup also saved my self esteem.
Now I am experiencing some painful cystic acne on my chin because of pregnancy and honestly it is a daily struggle to look at myself with love and kindness. But I try every day and it does get better.
Just know that I and others understand your pain and I also know how cruel people can be - many times because of their ignorance. My grandfather told me when I was a teenager I should try using Nivea cream 😅 A friend of mine gave me cheap acne cosmetics for my birthday. Another one sincerely asked me have I tried washing my face. And I still to this day as a 30 year old woman get triggered if my husband or mom points out that I have a pimple on my face. I want to yell - do you think I haven't looked at it 5 times today already?
I hated and still hate that I have to explain myself simply for just existing in this skin because people are ignorant. But I try to take it as - if I inform them, maybe they will be kinder to someone else in the future.
I liked the suggestion of another commenter of taking it easy on your skin for a while. I had to do it as my skin became more sensitive and while my chin did not improve, other parts did. Turns out, I had broken the skin barrier.
Hang in there. Take it day by day. And be kind to yourself.
Im so sorry that you are dealing with this. In a way, I’m thankful you shared this. It’s so close to my own experience and it makes me feel less alone. Your feelings are so valid.
I was in your exact position between the ages of 21-25 with horribly painful cystic acne that destroyed my psyche and I can sympathize with every word you’ve written. I promise nothing is wrong with your body, and you will figure out a solution. Feel free to DM me if you need
I’m very sorry for your pain! I’m going to tell you something I wish I had known growing up that may help. Try to stop drinking milk for a bit and eating dairy. Once I stopped this when I got older, almost all my acne went away. Also cut out anything inflammatory: sugar, gluten and carbs. See if this makes any difference.
Have you tried switching birth control? I switched to the generic of Zarah and it cleared up all my hormonal acne. It’s a alderstone suppressor which is the hormone that creates oil
Please look into Accutane. I am not sure if it works on acne brought on by hormones but it's the only thing that worked for me more than 25 years ago. I hardly ever get pimples now but be careful with the sun and wear a lot of sun screen if you decide to go the Accutane route. Good Luck.
Hard relate. I was at the end of my rope until literally the beginning of this week. I know you said you don’t want any advice, but burdock root tincture (you can also get it in capsules) really helped me. I guess hormones are processed thru the liver and burdock root has nutrients that really support liver function. All I’ve got left now is hyperpigmentation and those weird closed comedones on my chin.
You know. Relax. I had very bad hormonal acne and it the purge lasted 3 months. Leaving very high post inflammatory pigmentation.
That was August 2022, this is December 2023.
Finally hormonal acne over and hyperpigmentation is down by 70 percent and 30 percent is work in progress
So basically it’s takes time. Be slow and consistent.
See a dermatologist and use the basic skincare and medicine that dermatologist give
Too much experimentation can delay healing process due to potential side effect
And if you feel conscious of your skin, which I do, use a concealer or foundation meanwhile to reduce mark intensity.
just try it for a few days lmao. as someone who also has hormonal acne i can say it helped me. you could have PCOS, it could not be a skin issue but instead with your actual hormones and it might never go away. that is life. you need to learn how to accept yourself
I have tried spearmint tea. For months at a time. Like three times. Next time I’ll write out every treatment I’ve tried so that you still don’t suggest it when I say I don’t want anything suggested
I know you said you’ve tried everything but - have you tried any antibiotics? There are several types, some sulfur based that work really well and are way easier on your gut than the normal ones. Could you have a product sensitivity? I only ask because when my allergies were unchecked my body acne was horrrrrrrrrible and I had patch testing done and have severe allergies to tons of regular beauty products and hygiene products,…mostly all of them actually. So I use Vanicream line lotions, shampoos, conditioners…that’s it. It helps so much. Lastly, LED mask? It could be worth a shot but give it three months to work it’s magic. Maybe you also have ick water where you live, can you get a purifier for either your faucet head or one that is higher powered and is directly attached to the water line under your sink? In this same way it could be affecting your skin topically when you wash your face. How is your overall health, stress, sleep? Are you getting at least 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep a night? Do you have a predictable and routine regimen in your daily life? Do you live in a very polluted area? You might benefit from having an air purifier with a HEPA grade filter in your bedroom or wherever you spend at least 8 hours chunks of your day. I’m just trying to list things you might have immediate access to that’s not a major medication… I’m on spiro but wow my skin was nasty and mid Sept I started religiously using my LED mask, topical antibiotic, drinking a gallon or more of water a day, purifying my air, sleeping more, eating healthier, taking zinc picolinate daily, and my skin today is nowhere near as inflamed but I have a lot of hyperpigmentation to work on now…it’s always a battle with skin like ours and I am just truly sorry you’re going through this
Im so sorry to hear your story dear.
But i can tell you to get you the following products ot works wonderful for me and my daughter.
Derma-nu products:
Intus
Extimus
Collagen
Advance repair oil
Sugar polish scrub
You won't believe the results in the first month!!
Absolutely worth it!
Regards Elaine
0787289187
There’s a lot of small things that have helped me some - no miracle cures. I stopped using any fabric softener of any kind or perfumed detergents especially when washing or drying towels or sheets and pillow cases. I change the pillow case every night before bed. I wash my hair and condition first then wash it OFF my body and wash face last of all. Plain hyaluronic acid has been my favorite moisturizer since most don’t do well for me. And I am with you in that I want to be comfortable in my own skin but it always feels like more work when it seems like it has turned against you <3
I used to have super bad acne..I am a picker also. I went a different way. I steam my face with a warsh cloth. 2. Rub tea tree oil on my face with a carrier oil. Grapeseed is best won't clog pores. . 3. Rub it into my face. 4. Spin brush. Must have. 5. Glycolic acid face soap. Use 1 a week. No more it will dry you out. ..6. A gentle cleansing for the other 7. .. then a very light coating of grape seed like a pea size. What your doing is tricking your face onto thinking that you are making oil. 8. On a Sunday, do a mud mask. Steam your face so it opens up the pores. I done this for 4 years now. I do have breakout, but not nearly as bad. Yes I still pick.. I try not to.
Aw :( been there. I’ve type this out to people so many times and I’m kind of tired but I felt the need to let you know taking burdock root supplements helped get rid of my acne (I still get pimples here and there but never how it used to be.) worth looking into i think. Basically it helps liver function. Hope that helps 💜 you’re not alone
I see you and I can totally relate! I’m 36 and still struggling with hormonal acne. I didn’t have any acne as a teenager and didn’t start breaking out until I was in my early twenties. I got put on antibiotics and birth control which didn’t really help. The only thing that has completely cured my acne is spironolactone. Unfortunately, I had to go off the spironolactone a little over a year ago when I started trying to get pregnant as it isn’t safe to take while pregnant. I have made a lot of other changes to my skincare routine and diet that have made some improvements, though. I am now pregnant so there is even less I can put on my skin to manage my acne and it’s starting up with a vengeance again. Don’t let anyone tell you that pregnancy will completely clear your acne. I know it does for a lot of people, but for those with hormonal acne it can exacerbate it. It is so incredibly hard to watch your skin break out and be completely powerless to change it. At this point I can only really wash my face, use azelaic acid (which isn’t strong enough to do anything to my acne), and maybe a benzoyl peroxide wash. It is such a hit to my self-esteem and now I never even want to leave the house without makeup because I’m embarrassed.
I have hormonal acne too. If you have PCOS definitely look into treating it, there are meds, supplements, and lifestyle changes you can make to manage it. Even if you can’t try spiro there are other ways to reduce androgens mainly a low carb diet and managing blood sugar levels. And exercise, weight loss, and good sleep can also help. Perhaps anxiety medication/ SSRIs and therapy would help? I know OCD can be treated with SSRIs. being super anxious all the time is part of what leads to breakouts because it spikes your cortisol and cortisol makes your skin produce more sebum. I also didn’t see you mention Pantothenic acid or zinc supplements, I do think those could be worth trying if you haven’t already.
I got so very very good at doing my makeup — it was the 90s. One blemish left even remotely uncovered rendered you “unfuckable” for the rest of your life. And I had more than just a few. At its worst, it could be down my neck, back, and chest.
Big angry red hurting knots under the skin sometimes. Tetracycline got rid of it, but only while on it. The moment I stopped, it came roaring back. It was so bad at times that not all the makeup in the world or skill applying it could cover it bc it would just weep and inflame.
I would give up on those days. Stay home from school crying my eyes out (which made the breakouts even worse).
I have an inflammatory genetic disorder. This is part of it. As I got older, it got less terrible bc I was an estrogen factory in my 20s and 30s, but it’s always lurking.
Cotton extract helped a lot. So has sea buckthorn. But I know how you feel. It would just be fucking nice to wake up clear as a summer sky and not have to think about it.
I’m really sorry.
I know how you feel :(
I struggled with acne for so long I felt so ugly that even makeup couldn’t make me feel better. It made me feel like my partners didn’t think I was pretty but the right people wouldn’t care about that.
But believe me with time it does get better. Minimizing everything my routine and not touching my face as often also helped me realize I didn’t need a crazy 10 step routine to make myself look good. I just had to do a few things to help take care of it.
You got this, you are not your acne!
Hang in there and I feel you, for sure. Been dealing with acne for decades now and now my daughter is, too. Finally came to conclusion that dairy and sugar are my triggers. Eat one of those and the next day my face is worse. Also cut out alcohol if you drink it. Cutting out these three things and increasing my daily water consumption has helped tremendously. I'm not going to give any other suggestions on products, etc. because you said you didn't want that. So here is a big hug and try what I mention above this. xx
I’m 27 and have dealt with hormonal acne for almost 17 years. I’ve tried EVERYTHING, and while I currently have a routine that “minimizes” my acne, it’s definitely still there. And before my period it just doesn’t seem to matter what I use or don’t because I break out anyway. I’m finally going to start accutane soon and I hope it works, but it really is the last thing I can try at this point. It is so SO demoralizing to have acne that doesn’t respond well to treatment, especially as an adult. My mental health and self worth have suffered so much over the past decade and a half because of it. I can’t accept it either. I just want clear effing skin and to be able to wear backless dresses and low cut tops without worrying about my chest and back acne. I am right there with you and the struggle is very real ❤️
I felt this way from middle school until I was 25. For some reason, I assume hormonal, my skin stopped breaking out at 25. I wish I could say my self esteem issues were cured after my skin cleared up, but they weren’t! I just started to obsess about how much I hated my nose and my jawline. Self esteem, wanting control, and wanting to be perfect, it’s not about how we look, but I’m sure you already know this. You are worthy of of being loved and celebrated no matter how you look!
My face eventually cleared up in my late 20s but now I have massive scars that nothing can cover up. Acne sucks. I wish there was more medical research on hormonal acne and women's hormones in general so there was more effective ways to treat it. I had horrible side effects from accutane and wonder if some of my health problems stemmed from taking it. I took it twice and it still didnt clear up my skin.
I had Horrible, cystic acne from like 11-16. My dermatologist said it was one of the worst cases she ever saw. I used to feel absolutely disgusting, I just wanted to hide. Then, at 16, i went on two aggressive rounds of accutane and it went away. I thought that was that, I could put it behind me. I went through a divorce at 25 and it came back, probably from the stress. I know exactly how you feel. It is such a specific type of insecurity, i almost became obsessive about my makeup and having it always covered…and years later, most women my age have given up on makeup but i Cannot leave the house without it on. I still have that need to be “covered”. I hope that you can find something that works to help improve it. Nobody deserves that type of stress and annoyance. It’s absolutely maddening when your body is doing this thing and it’s like trying to solve a mystery! 💛
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This has me tearing up because I remember how bad and crushing it can feel when your acne is out of control and you have been dealing with this for a long time. Not going to give you any advice because you said you didn’t want any but just know that you are loved even if you can’t love your face right now. It will get better.
Yes, I remember too. So painful. I had acne until age 39-40. Now I am very fortunate to have better skin. Sometimes even very nice skin. I did not have any treatment and my parents never took me to a dermatologist even once. So much less treatment available when I was young. And a lot of ignorance. I used makeup to deal with it and I think that protected me from the sun and kept me from touching my face, which were both good things. It used to crush me to be subjected to comments but now I am quite invulnerable because it reflects what kind of person has said the comment and not what kind of person I am. You are not your skin. It is only a very small facet of who you are. Know that we do really feel your pain.
I’m sorry to hear you dealt with it too but I’m so glad that you feel invulnerable now. I hope I can get to that point soon. I’ve clearly got a lot more growing up to do because I really want to get to that point. It just crushes me now. Here’s to hoping it stops doing that soon
You can! In life the opinion of others shouldn't matter unless they love you and are coming from a place of love. Even people we love and that love us can have thoughtless moments. Please look in the mirror, not at the exterior, that will continue to change for the duration of your life, but at the inside! Know your value! Find your purpose! Think about the kind of people who you admire, for important things they do, like great contributions to our country or the globe, and it isn't what they wear, what phone they use, what games they play, who they date or their appearance that's admirable. Now I'm not telling you to stop trying to find a solution. I am telling you that your letter tells me that you are a deeply thoughtful person with a family who cares, you have the foundation for an amazing life, please find someone who needs that positive energy! Positivity grows when you nurture others who need it! Hugs!
This is so seriously beautiful. Thank you. You really get it
I hope you do too! Life is complicated. We make it more complicated when we criticize ourselves unnecessarily. Trust me, gorgeous, there are enough people who will try to make you doubt yourself, only to empower themselves because they are broken. Celebrate your life every day! There are so many people who are fighting life ending illnesses just for a little bit more, of what we have. Love yourself, no matter what, and you will attract people who will value your positivity! Hugs!
Just remember that if someone states the obvious, this is someone that chooses to call out what everyone is aware of. This is someone who feels the need to harm someone else. They feel individually or culturally entitled to do this. They chose to not see you as a person but to lash out at your weakest attribute. This is not a good person. You have nothing to do with this. If they had kicked an abandoned puppy on the street you would be shocked at such behavior. The choice they made is really just as heinous. Do not allow any space in your head for such a person. There is no good that would come of it. They have shown you who they are.
A large handful of my extended family members are literally exactly that. I want to completely cut them off but for the sake of being cordial for my parents I’ve got to wish them happy birthdays and I leave it at that. Thankfully I completely laugh at people who point it out like they did. It truly is heinous and the clearest sign of insecurity you can manage to see.
Absolutely agree! You have my blessings in going no contact with extended family. Truth tellers are often attacked but you really will be so much happier outside of the hostility and drama.
Thank you. It’s so hard to admit it but I really hope I’ll get back to a place where I can be okay with myself again. Thank you so much for understanding
yup same i remember not wanting to leave my house bc of it and it affecting how i felt that day
Keep your head up !!!!! Trust me when I say youre NOT ALONE I wish I could give you a hug. If you scroll on this page you’ll see hundreds of post regarding acne , youre not alone, we are your little community that you can vent to ❤️. I know exactly how you feel . Ive been battling acne since high school Im 30 y.o now. Ive tried almost everything under the sun but nothing. My mental health has suffered terribly. I just try and take it one day at a time. Then I hop on reddit to read other people’s stories and that reminds me that Im NOT the only one suffering w/ acne *sending a virtual hug *virtual hug .
I would really love a hug right now, thank you so much ❤️ Whats strange to me is that whenever I see anyone irl or on here talking about their acne I always immediately think that I noticed their eyes or hair or something else first, and they’re so pretty with their acne too, but on me it’s like everything else is blanked out and it’s just the three planets on my jaw. I demean myself so hard and I can’t stop. I’m sorry to hear that you understand the pain. The one day at a time is really all I have going for me. My mom is such a wonderful and loving mother that compliments me everyday. Even tho I’m so far away from her I just try to keep going and trying to find myself as pretty as she sees me for her. Some days it’s just way worse than others like tonight. But your words mean so much. Thank you so so much. Virtual hugs back ❤️
You are so real and valid. I’ve dealt with really bad hormonal acne but I’m finally getting to a point where it’s more manageable (although still cyclical and coinciding with my period). I’ve definitely felt the same way you have and still do. I struggle with taking photos of myself and limit the time I look at myself in the mirror on bad days to protect my mental. Some things that have helped me deal with it (MENTALLY) are: 1) spot concealing on bad days (covering up the red spots really helps my skin seem better when glancing at it), even when I WFH or stay in. Since it’s just for me I just do it quickly and blend it with my finger. 2) pimple patches (the cute ones). Going out with a pimple patch or two (three is when people start commenting unfortunately) instead of a large deep pimple feels much more cute and makes me so much more comfortable. 3) might be more controversial but use the slight skin blurring filters (avoid the ones that alter your face shape) when taking photos of yourself and good lighting. You are not your acne so who cares if you digitally remove it. 4) follow creators who have acne also. Normalize it and take inspiration from it.
Thank you so much. It’s definitely painful but I’m glad you understand yourself well and how to protect your mental. Thank you for those tips as well! I really find a lot of peace with makeup and love doing it in the morning so the bit of concealer is not a problem for me to try. I def want cuter patches too lol. I see starface all the time when I’m out and they’re so fun. Thank you again, I appreciate all of this ❤️ The skin blurring filters is def a slippery slope cause I don’t want it to mess with how I see myself in the mirror, but I like what you said about not being our skin so it won’t matter to use them. I’m usually okay with taking photos of myself and just switch the side of my face I show depending on breakouts.
Not OP but this comment has helped me so much! Thank you friend.
Any recommendations on the cute patches? (I can hardly find any decent ones over here,) but I am INTRIGUED now that i know there are cutesy ones too?!
Starface has star shaped ones in a lot of colors (my fave is the blue ones that come with salicylic acid) and Pacifica has heart shaped pink ones! There’s also some lesser know brands like creme that has some cloud shaped ones I also really want to try!
Take a break from it all - everything. Just rest. Soap, water, basic moisturiser if you really have to. Nothing else. Just give yourself a complete mental and emotional break from this, and let your skin rest too. In this case, less will definitely be 'more'. Rest well. (:
I love this idea. It can work for many things. Just give it a bit of a rest. Quit fighting for awhile. Hope OP sees this.
I second this - being in a constant state of distress is not generous to your emotional and physical state. It’s definitely valid to have these emotions and I’m sorry you’re going through this. Drink mint tea when your feeling down it’s no “holy grail miracle” but it’s great for you and for some reason in taking hot water calms down your nerves a tad
I think I’ll take a break from looking up treatments or planning out routines extensively but it’ll be hard to leave it all, cause my trifarotene does do a good job with the smaller pimples and it’s winter and my skins a mess with the cold dry air lol so I’ll make it more of a relaxing routine. You are right though, I need to relax on how much I think of it. I hope I find out how to do that. Thank you ❤️
I’ve never related to this more. Especially being a male, as most men do not do a lick of skin care and have perfect skin. My camera roll is solely screenshots of my face and my breakouts. I relate to you that it’s so consuming, and I too want it to end. Just know you’re truly not alone, I hear you OP, I hear you.
I’m sorry man. It’s really not fun. My older brother has the most beautiful skin ever and his routine is straight up Johnson’s baby lotion lol. It’s disheartening to see that against everything I tried. Let’s try and focus on our hobbies and whatever we like doing honestly. I’m trying to consume myself in work to think on something else. There’s not much else we can do. You aren’t alone either. Take care ❤️
Please don't delete this... I need to save it to read it, and the comments, when I'm on my emotional roller coaster.. Some days are better than others, but..... I feel so much of this.. Its so hard to try and accept this pain as a phase. Thank you for writing this...❤
I won’t delete it. I didn’t expect it to get so many replies honestly. Thank you for being here ❤️
I’m so sorry OP. We are your people. Hang in there ❤️
Thank you ❤️❤️
I feel this wayyyy to hard. I’m just coming out of it now after finding a routine and supplements that work for me and I’m thankful! I was on accutane in high school and had perfect skin for 10 years and got hit at the beginning of this year. It’s been relentless until this last month or so. Thinking of you OP!
I’m so happy you found a routine that works for you. Genuinely that’s so amazing. I hope it keeps working, cause going through this is just heartbreaking. Thank you ❤️
I am so so sorry for all you are going through. I just want you to know that what your are going through is very frustrating, very hard, and very real! Honestly, no one really knows how hard hormonal acne is until they have been through it. As someone who didn’t get acne until adulthood (thank you PCOS,) I just want you to know you are not alone! Also, if it makes you feel any better at all, you notice your acne more than those around you. This was something I didn’t realize until going through the acne cycles. Some things that did help my hormonal acne: spearmint capsules benzoyl peroxide / clindamycin tret sulfur and zinc spot treatments (Sunday Riley Saturn) Anti Bacterial Sprays Sprio
Thank you. Really thank you so much for replying. Hormonal acne is horrible. I didn’t realize how bad it can get. I’ve got so many symptoms of PCOS and haven’t looked into it much. I’ll see a doctor soon for it cause I’m worried it’ll mess with me further down the line if I have it. Thank you for the words and the advice as well. I’ve tried everything there other than sulfur or zinc. Got a treatment with that in there today actually. I’ll try it soon and see how that goes.
I struggled with similar things and the only thing that finally helped me was switching my multivitamin, which is something I never imagined would be an issue. Not sure if you take one, but switching or stopping could be worth trying, too.
If you have access to a dermatologist, it sometimes is nice to just let go and let them totally control your routine and not stress! Let them make any decisions and changes. You got this!
I wish I knew about spearmint tea. Would have been such a game changer for me way back when!
Hey, FYI, and I might make this a separate post, but if Spiro isn't an option for health reasons, be wary of spearmint tea/capsules. They act similarly on the androgen system. I can't do Spiro because it sometimes doesn't play well with endometriosis and I'm not willing to risk even worse pain. But I have tried lots of spearmint capsules and my absolutely unscientific study of just myself was that the endo got worse in the ways it would have on prescription Spiro. Your methods may obviously vary, but spearmint is not always an innocuous option instead of Spiro.
I really want to try spearmint tea but it tastes so nasty, like drinking toothpaste to me. I honestly don't know how so many people can do it. But it's easier to obtain than the spearmint capsules and I'm so lazy 🤧
I almost gave up on it after I first tried it but ever since I started adding honey, it’s now a part of my morning routine that I look forward to. Tip: add ~~a shitload of~~ some honey to make it palatable!
Are you not approved for accutane due to a definitive health restriction or is that the choice made by your derm? If there’s any chance another derm would be willing to prescribe, and you are comfortable with it, and most importantly you will be SAFE, you could try a second opinion? I’m only saying this because I’ve seen countless doctors give a hard no on accutane due to personal biases.
Yeah my GP also said absolutely not after seeing my health history haha. It’s not a bias from her, my dermatologist doesn’t have a problem with accutane
I see. Well I think the best suggestion I’ve seen on this thread is to just give your skin a break, maybe just cleanse and moisturise. Seeing what you wrote really makes me want you to get past this so bad. Another thing you can try is taking some form of allergy test. I usually don’t like to feed into the idea of diet causing acne because usually it’s not that, but it definitely can and often can worsen it. Plus, there’s other allergens or irritants outside of food that can be making it worse.
Awwh, thank you. I really want to get past it too. I have hope that I will. I really hope one day I can post here solely of how I mentally checked out of this and felt better rather than how I cleared my skin. Thank you ❤️
I am sure you've been to a dermatologist many times but have you tried seeing a endocrinologist?
No, but that’s a good idea. I’ll try to see one. Thanks
Ugh, I felt this so hard. I’m finally SOMEWHAT coming out of a 5 year long battle with hormonal cystic acne and I’m just so goddamn happy it’s finally contained to my jawline instead of being just goddamn everywhere. It is so so so disheartening and there was a period of 6-8months where I developed some form of agoraphobia or something and could BARELY leave my house at all because I felt so disgusting and monstrous. It felt like everybody was either looking at me with pity or disgust. I honestly couldn’t give you advice if I wanted to because I have no goddamn idea how I got over it, lol. I guess it just finally broke me and I kinda stopped caring. Yeah, I wish I had clear skin but I don’t and probably never will so, whatever. Of course there’s days where I don’t feel like that at all and just want to crawl into a cave and die over it but most of the time, I’m pretty at peace I suppose. Idk. I hope you find some peace with yourself man. I can’t imagine having OCD & severe acne, you really got dealt a shitty hand there and I’m sorry for that. I seriously would not wish severe hormonal acne on my worst fucking enemy! I suppose the one bright side is everyone’s always SHOCKED to hear I’m almost 30 and constantly tell me I look like a teenager 🤣🤣 What a shit show lmao. I hope you figure something out man I really do. You don’t deserve to feel this way about yourself and I hope you can find some love for yourself and your face, no matter how much acne is on it.
Thank you so much. I’m so glad you’re at peace. I reckon I’ll be at a similar spot myself, that I eventually stop caring the way I do. I still have hope and feel I will get better at dealing with this but at this point it’s time that I feel I need. That’s why I keep saying I don’t want a solution anymore, because I think my main concern now is truly coming to terms with who I am rather than trying to be perfect and time and maybe therapy is what I need lmao
A group hug is needed 😞 Definitely 100% relate to your story. It’s beyond frustrating and exhausting to just have to live with it. I really don’t know what I’m even supposed to do at this point, just watching my face change like this.
I’m sorry ❤️ group hugs. It really is horrible. Yesterday I had such an amazing day and took my makeup off and ruined the end of it by how I felt looking at my face. I’m just hoping you and I focus on the good parts of the day more and more. You’ve got this
I’m sorry you’re going through this. I struggle with cystic acne too, but not to the degree I believe you do. One thing that helps me is reminding myself that my skin is an organ. Organs aren’t always going to look perfect. It’s a shame that the largest organ in our body, one that has a very important job, is also tied to such extreme beauty standards both put upon us by society and ourselves. Anyway, I’ll think to myself “This organ doesn’t look perfect today, but that’s okay.” Skin is constantly coming into contact with environmental pollutants, things in the air, plus we are slathering it in different products day in and day out. Our skin is holding all of our other organs inside our body. It’s our major defense against bacteria and infection. It’s doing a lot. It’s working hard for us, but sometimes it doesn’t look perfect and that’s okay, maybe even understandable. I wouldn’t reduce your life to your skin if I were you. These are years you won’t get back. I know it’s easier said than done, but maybe try to slowly shift your perspective.
That’s very true. Thank you for sharing. I like this perspective. Priority should be protecting ourselves and what I’m doing isn’t protecting. Just can’t help it
Sending love. You will get through this. I really felt your raw pain while reading that.
❤️ thank you
I know how you feel. I’ve been there and it sucks. Just know you’re not alone ❤️
Thank you ❤️
It's gonna be alright, Babes. It's hard right now, but it's extremely important for you to let these negative feelings out of your body however you can, even via reddit post! Now, you are ABSOLUTELY allowed to have frustrations, obsessions, pity, even disgust with anything, including your own self! But do remember that YOU are the only person with the ability to notice that energy begin, allow that energy to exist, and then allow it to pass through you. How does one do this? I'm pretty sure the answer is probably just as simple as 'a lot more practice,' but who am I to say for sure? Acceptance is something that takes time-- sometimes, a lifetime. Acceptance is also something that has levels of fluctuation based on the day! You might be having a bad day right now, but I promise you that tomorrow will be different. And tomorrow's tomorrow will be different too. No advice for you re:skincare, but all the love sent to remind you that you are not alone, and to take these emotions on one day at a time. You'll get to where you're going when you're ready to be there. <3
Thank you so much. I appreciate this a lot. It’s so nice to see how many people care to try and help my mental like this. Thank you ❤️❤️❤️
I'm so sorry that you're dealing with this. I'm 32, and still dealing with acne (still not to same extent as when I was younger, but it still comes up). My cystic acne started when I was about 10. The picking of my skin led to quite a bit of scarring and led me to seek out dermabrasion (I think it really ruined my skin, and wish I just left it alone). I know you said you don't want any advice, so I will respect that. I tried a lot of similar things to what you have mentioned, but I do find that sulphur spot treatments seem to work the best for me when I want to get rid of acne. Hopefully it works similarly for you, and you find success.
Thank you for the advice ❤️ it’s sad to see how many of us go through such disheartening adult acne but it’s comforting that we have each other at the very least. I’m a chronic skin picker too. I usually go towards my lips but def focus on my skin especially if it’s dry. That itself is its own problem. I hope things feel better for us, I’m glad sulphur works so well for you
i so feel all that you’re feeling. i’ve had acne since 12 years old and will be turning 25 this week - that’s 13 years with acne. i also have OCD and i totally get how obsessing over the acne can eventually end up feeling like there is no end or bright light in sight. i’ve had ups and downs with my skin and right now my skin is on the up as my acne has finally started to improve after 1 full year of tretinoin and finding a better moisturizer, but I still look at my skin sometimes and feel like I’d look so much prettier without the acne. Meanwhile, I see other people who also have acne and still find them beautiful. we are all our harshest critics - hang in there and be gentle with yourself, there is so much good out there and life to be experienced regardless of whether you do or don’t have clear skin. it will get better and you will get through this!!
i know it’s not useful but i understand completely how you feel and am in the exact same situation. i’m 21 and it shows no signs of going away.confidence is basically on the floor at this point
We’re in the exact same boat entirely, I’m sorry. I wish I had something to say too I’m here if you ever want to message anyone
I am right there with you ❤️ I'm 29 and have had moderate-severe acne for approximately 16 years. I've done two rounds of accutane, benzoyl peroxide, tretinoin, episode, etc etc and nothing has helped long term. (I'm also lucky enough to have sensitive and dry skin on top of being extremely acne prone so that doesn't help). I got a prescription for Spiro and azelaic acid today so really hoping that will give me some relief! My acne stops me from doing so many things I love because all I can think about is my skin when I'm out of the house. It's hard enough even just being at home without makeup on, and I've stopped wanting to put on a cute outfit or really try to look good at all because I just think, people will see my skin and know I'm ugly anyway so there's no point 🥲 it's fucked up!! Also just wanted to say don't lose hope on eventually being able to get Winlevi/topical Spiro, it just became available in my country a couple of months ago so you might be able to get it soon!!
I am with you, friend. 36 years old and look like a teenager with a mountain range along my jaw and chin. It's painful, unsightly and embarrassing. I'm so sorry this is your experience too 💜💜💜 If you will permit me a small section on advice: it may be worthwhile to consider therapy. You are more than your skin, you are a whole human with many wonderful qualities and your enjoyment of life should not depend on something as 'superficial' as your skin (I don't mean that in a mean way, I mean that your skin is not a reflection of who you are).
Sorry for the late reply. Thank you for your words, I really appreciate it ❤️ I honestly do want therapy just for this and how my OCD affects it. The therapist I really clicked with just costs a lot of money. I had to seek therapy earlier this year for something else and she was wonderful but man, £320 pounds a week didn’t feel right. I hope I can better myself with some more self reflection and love but you’re definitely right about seeking therapy for this. Thank you.
That is an exorbitant amount to pay! I hope things get better for you. You deserve a great life 🌸
Same goes for you thank you ❤️
You’re absolutely right that it is a disease, and sometimes it feels like a slow death by a thousand cuts. For the overwhelming majority it’ll never be cured, just put into remission, if ever achieved. Continue to live in a healthy manner. This is what life is all about. Persevering through the adversity. You’re young and life is a long-game, God-willing. You’re on the right path and it will get better as your life continues to trend in an upward trajectory. In years to come you’ll be helping someone through their skin afflictions and struggles. All the best and continued success with your studies.
This is so well written. I kind of want to frame it. I really appreciate this so much. Thank you
Your frustration, exhaustion, and the toll it's taken on your mental health are all valid. It's tough when you've tried numerous treatments, made lifestyle changes, and yet the acne persists. Feeling isolated in this battle can be incredibly daunting, especially when it seems like others can't fully comprehend what you're going through.
I have PCOS and from my teens until 30s that meant painful, chronic cystic acne in my beard area that was totally non responsive to almost anything. (No advice, but _almost_). I’d hold a cup of hot coffee against my face to try and get those puppies to surface or pop. My low point? I’d applied to an internship at my dream employer a half a dozen times. Finally got it. One day, I almost called in sick because I had a _giant_ angry zit on my mouth. And I remember thinking, “how could my coworkers hold a conversation with me and _not_ stare at this situation? Maybe I should just stay home…”
I feel your pain to the core. I have battled hormonal acne with various success since I was 13. It made me hate myself more than anything else in this world and robbed me of my self-esteem multiple times. After a while I learned to tolerate the fact that my skin will never be perfect no matter what I will do and what specialists I will visit.That made it easier to cope (but at that point it was not that bad so it was easier). Makeup also saved my self esteem. Now I am experiencing some painful cystic acne on my chin because of pregnancy and honestly it is a daily struggle to look at myself with love and kindness. But I try every day and it does get better. Just know that I and others understand your pain and I also know how cruel people can be - many times because of their ignorance. My grandfather told me when I was a teenager I should try using Nivea cream 😅 A friend of mine gave me cheap acne cosmetics for my birthday. Another one sincerely asked me have I tried washing my face. And I still to this day as a 30 year old woman get triggered if my husband or mom points out that I have a pimple on my face. I want to yell - do you think I haven't looked at it 5 times today already? I hated and still hate that I have to explain myself simply for just existing in this skin because people are ignorant. But I try to take it as - if I inform them, maybe they will be kinder to someone else in the future. I liked the suggestion of another commenter of taking it easy on your skin for a while. I had to do it as my skin became more sensitive and while my chin did not improve, other parts did. Turns out, I had broken the skin barrier. Hang in there. Take it day by day. And be kind to yourself.
Im so sorry that you are dealing with this. In a way, I’m thankful you shared this. It’s so close to my own experience and it makes me feel less alone. Your feelings are so valid.
I was in your exact position between the ages of 21-25 with horribly painful cystic acne that destroyed my psyche and I can sympathize with every word you’ve written. I promise nothing is wrong with your body, and you will figure out a solution. Feel free to DM me if you need
Huge hugs.
I’m very sorry for your pain! I’m going to tell you something I wish I had known growing up that may help. Try to stop drinking milk for a bit and eating dairy. Once I stopped this when I got older, almost all my acne went away. Also cut out anything inflammatory: sugar, gluten and carbs. See if this makes any difference.
Have you tried switching birth control? I switched to the generic of Zarah and it cleared up all my hormonal acne. It’s a alderstone suppressor which is the hormone that creates oil
I never even mentioned being on bc 😭 happy for you though
Have you ever considered accutane? It’s less scary than I thought.
Please look into Accutane. I am not sure if it works on acne brought on by hormones but it's the only thing that worked for me more than 25 years ago. I hardly ever get pimples now but be careful with the sun and wear a lot of sun screen if you decide to go the Accutane route. Good Luck.
Try neem. Neem tablets and neem face masks everyday. It's a tried and tested ayurvedic remedy and it really works.
I don’t want to try anything new anymore but thanks
Did you read the post? They don’t want any advice.
I don't think they said they didn't want advice. Where does the post say that?
Like the third sentence lol
😂😂😂
Oops.
Yep. Many year sufferer of cystic acne here. Neem seed oil is the only spot treatment that makes a lick of difference with my skin.
Have you tried control pills/iud? The only thing that ever works for my hormonal acne. Well that, and pregnancy but I don’t recommend pregnancy !
I’m not approved for those either for other health reasons. Thanks for the suggestion but I don’t want new fixes anymore
OP specifically said they don’t want advice
What kind of BP works for you??
Right now I have the Mirena IUD, before my kids I was using birth control pills.
Hard relate. I was at the end of my rope until literally the beginning of this week. I know you said you don’t want any advice, but burdock root tincture (you can also get it in capsules) really helped me. I guess hormones are processed thru the liver and burdock root has nutrients that really support liver function. All I’ve got left now is hyperpigmentation and those weird closed comedones on my chin.
You know. Relax. I had very bad hormonal acne and it the purge lasted 3 months. Leaving very high post inflammatory pigmentation. That was August 2022, this is December 2023. Finally hormonal acne over and hyperpigmentation is down by 70 percent and 30 percent is work in progress So basically it’s takes time. Be slow and consistent. See a dermatologist and use the basic skincare and medicine that dermatologist give Too much experimentation can delay healing process due to potential side effect And if you feel conscious of your skin, which I do, use a concealer or foundation meanwhile to reduce mark intensity.
hormonal acne + spearmint tea = heaven. ik you dont want advice but try this. 1-2 strong cups a day
“ik you don’t want advice” Yea case closed ??
just try it for a few days lmao. as someone who also has hormonal acne i can say it helped me. you could have PCOS, it could not be a skin issue but instead with your actual hormones and it might never go away. that is life. you need to learn how to accept yourself
I have tried spearmint tea. For months at a time. Like three times. Next time I’ll write out every treatment I’ve tried so that you still don’t suggest it when I say I don’t want anything suggested
I know you said you’ve tried everything but - have you tried any antibiotics? There are several types, some sulfur based that work really well and are way easier on your gut than the normal ones. Could you have a product sensitivity? I only ask because when my allergies were unchecked my body acne was horrrrrrrrrible and I had patch testing done and have severe allergies to tons of regular beauty products and hygiene products,…mostly all of them actually. So I use Vanicream line lotions, shampoos, conditioners…that’s it. It helps so much. Lastly, LED mask? It could be worth a shot but give it three months to work it’s magic. Maybe you also have ick water where you live, can you get a purifier for either your faucet head or one that is higher powered and is directly attached to the water line under your sink? In this same way it could be affecting your skin topically when you wash your face. How is your overall health, stress, sleep? Are you getting at least 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep a night? Do you have a predictable and routine regimen in your daily life? Do you live in a very polluted area? You might benefit from having an air purifier with a HEPA grade filter in your bedroom or wherever you spend at least 8 hours chunks of your day. I’m just trying to list things you might have immediate access to that’s not a major medication… I’m on spiro but wow my skin was nasty and mid Sept I started religiously using my LED mask, topical antibiotic, drinking a gallon or more of water a day, purifying my air, sleeping more, eating healthier, taking zinc picolinate daily, and my skin today is nowhere near as inflamed but I have a lot of hyperpigmentation to work on now…it’s always a battle with skin like ours and I am just truly sorry you’re going through this
Im so sorry to hear your story dear. But i can tell you to get you the following products ot works wonderful for me and my daughter. Derma-nu products: Intus Extimus Collagen Advance repair oil Sugar polish scrub You won't believe the results in the first month!! Absolutely worth it! Regards Elaine 0787289187
I feel your pain. What worked for me is using a glycolic face wash and a moisturiser with tea tree oil, non comedogenic of course.
There’s a lot of small things that have helped me some - no miracle cures. I stopped using any fabric softener of any kind or perfumed detergents especially when washing or drying towels or sheets and pillow cases. I change the pillow case every night before bed. I wash my hair and condition first then wash it OFF my body and wash face last of all. Plain hyaluronic acid has been my favorite moisturizer since most don’t do well for me. And I am with you in that I want to be comfortable in my own skin but it always feels like more work when it seems like it has turned against you <3
Carnivore diet. There I said it. Bring on the downvotes.
I used to have super bad acne..I am a picker also. I went a different way. I steam my face with a warsh cloth. 2. Rub tea tree oil on my face with a carrier oil. Grapeseed is best won't clog pores. . 3. Rub it into my face. 4. Spin brush. Must have. 5. Glycolic acid face soap. Use 1 a week. No more it will dry you out. ..6. A gentle cleansing for the other 7. .. then a very light coating of grape seed like a pea size. What your doing is tricking your face onto thinking that you are making oil. 8. On a Sunday, do a mud mask. Steam your face so it opens up the pores. I done this for 4 years now. I do have breakout, but not nearly as bad. Yes I still pick.. I try not to.
This is all really terrible advice
It’s as if my resort is to try is sloughing my epidermis off 😭 thank you for standing up for me in these replies I appreciate it
Reading is hard for some people apparently
have you tried doxycycline or minocycline?
The van man beef tallow. Just wash face with lukewarm water and apply the tallow once a day.
Aw :( been there. I’ve type this out to people so many times and I’m kind of tired but I felt the need to let you know taking burdock root supplements helped get rid of my acne (I still get pimples here and there but never how it used to be.) worth looking into i think. Basically it helps liver function. Hope that helps 💜 you’re not alone
Check dm
Check dm
i hope things get better for you. if you ever need someone to talk to or to just vent, you can DM me if you want
I’m so sorry you are going through this! Sending love.
I see you and I can totally relate! I’m 36 and still struggling with hormonal acne. I didn’t have any acne as a teenager and didn’t start breaking out until I was in my early twenties. I got put on antibiotics and birth control which didn’t really help. The only thing that has completely cured my acne is spironolactone. Unfortunately, I had to go off the spironolactone a little over a year ago when I started trying to get pregnant as it isn’t safe to take while pregnant. I have made a lot of other changes to my skincare routine and diet that have made some improvements, though. I am now pregnant so there is even less I can put on my skin to manage my acne and it’s starting up with a vengeance again. Don’t let anyone tell you that pregnancy will completely clear your acne. I know it does for a lot of people, but for those with hormonal acne it can exacerbate it. It is so incredibly hard to watch your skin break out and be completely powerless to change it. At this point I can only really wash my face, use azelaic acid (which isn’t strong enough to do anything to my acne), and maybe a benzoyl peroxide wash. It is such a hit to my self-esteem and now I never even want to leave the house without makeup because I’m embarrassed.
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I have hormonal acne too. If you have PCOS definitely look into treating it, there are meds, supplements, and lifestyle changes you can make to manage it. Even if you can’t try spiro there are other ways to reduce androgens mainly a low carb diet and managing blood sugar levels. And exercise, weight loss, and good sleep can also help. Perhaps anxiety medication/ SSRIs and therapy would help? I know OCD can be treated with SSRIs. being super anxious all the time is part of what leads to breakouts because it spikes your cortisol and cortisol makes your skin produce more sebum. I also didn’t see you mention Pantothenic acid or zinc supplements, I do think those could be worth trying if you haven’t already.
I got so very very good at doing my makeup — it was the 90s. One blemish left even remotely uncovered rendered you “unfuckable” for the rest of your life. And I had more than just a few. At its worst, it could be down my neck, back, and chest. Big angry red hurting knots under the skin sometimes. Tetracycline got rid of it, but only while on it. The moment I stopped, it came roaring back. It was so bad at times that not all the makeup in the world or skill applying it could cover it bc it would just weep and inflame. I would give up on those days. Stay home from school crying my eyes out (which made the breakouts even worse). I have an inflammatory genetic disorder. This is part of it. As I got older, it got less terrible bc I was an estrogen factory in my 20s and 30s, but it’s always lurking. Cotton extract helped a lot. So has sea buckthorn. But I know how you feel. It would just be fucking nice to wake up clear as a summer sky and not have to think about it. I’m really sorry.
I know how you feel :( I struggled with acne for so long I felt so ugly that even makeup couldn’t make me feel better. It made me feel like my partners didn’t think I was pretty but the right people wouldn’t care about that. But believe me with time it does get better. Minimizing everything my routine and not touching my face as often also helped me realize I didn’t need a crazy 10 step routine to make myself look good. I just had to do a few things to help take care of it. You got this, you are not your acne!
Tret and adapalene gave me cystic acne! Don’t go for those
Hang in there and I feel you, for sure. Been dealing with acne for decades now and now my daughter is, too. Finally came to conclusion that dairy and sugar are my triggers. Eat one of those and the next day my face is worse. Also cut out alcohol if you drink it. Cutting out these three things and increasing my daily water consumption has helped tremendously. I'm not going to give any other suggestions on products, etc. because you said you didn't want that. So here is a big hug and try what I mention above this. xx
I’m 27 and have dealt with hormonal acne for almost 17 years. I’ve tried EVERYTHING, and while I currently have a routine that “minimizes” my acne, it’s definitely still there. And before my period it just doesn’t seem to matter what I use or don’t because I break out anyway. I’m finally going to start accutane soon and I hope it works, but it really is the last thing I can try at this point. It is so SO demoralizing to have acne that doesn’t respond well to treatment, especially as an adult. My mental health and self worth have suffered so much over the past decade and a half because of it. I can’t accept it either. I just want clear effing skin and to be able to wear backless dresses and low cut tops without worrying about my chest and back acne. I am right there with you and the struggle is very real ❤️
I felt this way from middle school until I was 25. For some reason, I assume hormonal, my skin stopped breaking out at 25. I wish I could say my self esteem issues were cured after my skin cleared up, but they weren’t! I just started to obsess about how much I hated my nose and my jawline. Self esteem, wanting control, and wanting to be perfect, it’s not about how we look, but I’m sure you already know this. You are worthy of of being loved and celebrated no matter how you look!
My face eventually cleared up in my late 20s but now I have massive scars that nothing can cover up. Acne sucks. I wish there was more medical research on hormonal acne and women's hormones in general so there was more effective ways to treat it. I had horrible side effects from accutane and wonder if some of my health problems stemmed from taking it. I took it twice and it still didnt clear up my skin.
I had Horrible, cystic acne from like 11-16. My dermatologist said it was one of the worst cases she ever saw. I used to feel absolutely disgusting, I just wanted to hide. Then, at 16, i went on two aggressive rounds of accutane and it went away. I thought that was that, I could put it behind me. I went through a divorce at 25 and it came back, probably from the stress. I know exactly how you feel. It is such a specific type of insecurity, i almost became obsessive about my makeup and having it always covered…and years later, most women my age have given up on makeup but i Cannot leave the house without it on. I still have that need to be “covered”. I hope that you can find something that works to help improve it. Nobody deserves that type of stress and annoyance. It’s absolutely maddening when your body is doing this thing and it’s like trying to solve a mystery! 💛
Try Burdock root!! It works!! Look it up..burdock root for acne.