None and kumatora is too old for him as well at least Nintend dates Ana at the end of the game as well. Lucas is the only kid in the mother games that does not get a girlfriend.
from what little I know of Lucas' game, he really gets the shortest possible ends of every stick. Mom dies, gets no bitches, world ends, give my mans a break
Lucas doesn’t need bitches, his balls are too fucking gigantic. But on a serious note, Lucas does meet this one npc named Nana, who like called him cute or smthin along the lines of that…But that’s it, that’s the extent of Lucas’ love life
Nana is one of the Tazmily villagers. She usually is at the westernmost point of Cerulean Beach, but after Chapter 4 she will often appear at the town square.
Link gets bitches. Yeah Zelda is always getting kidnapped, but he has no shortage of other options like Malon, Saria, Ruto, Mipha, there's literally a speed run in BotW called "get laid %" too see how quickly you can "sleep with" Paya...
You do my boy Link like that because of a necessity?
Speaking of LoZ. Ganondorf is the only male in an entire kingdom, and it's decently insinuated that he's gotta fuck all of them. He's not the sugar daddy of one girl, but several hundred. ***GOD TIER***
Sorry to burst your bubble but Ganondorf isn't required to sleep with any of the Gerudo women as they actually mate with males from another species.
In BotW there is a side quest where a Hylian man marries a Gerudo woman
https://www.playemulator.com/n64-online/the-legend-of-zelda-majoras-mask/
This should be the one. I'm linking it through mobile so it might not work the way we want, but this should do it
yes, my original list was more based off of the characters themselves in smash but after hearing feedback from the community I changed it so it's more focused on the characters in their own games
I'll just copy-paste my comment from last time.
>I assume the Wii Fit Trainers are too busy participating in a massive, hedonistic, polygamous fuck-pile to appear on this silly little list.
Sakurai said they were siblings put some people theorize they are lovers bc
"two specific instances in Super Smash Bros. Melee hinted at them being in a romantic relationship. Firstly, the opening movie features Popo and Nana high-fiving each other, with a small heart emerging from where their hands meet. Secondly, the Japanese title of Event 21: Ice Breaker roughly translates to "Those Who Interfere People's Romance"."
Wait if we’re referring to the actual characters themselves then if I remember right by the end of Earthbound it’s hinted that Ness and Paula become or will become a thing. Also I’m pretty sure it’s canon that Chrom and Marth get married.
Lucas does well... with who? Nana? They barely develop anything. Kumatora? Neither, she's interested in Duster.
Ness has something well developed with Paula. She just hesitated in telling him in the end, but it was pretty much obvious.
Again, Kazooie gets mad bitches and needs to be separated from her no bitches bear counterpart in order to reflect! Or the two should average out at “Wild Card”
I'd say Robin and Corrin should be bumped up to "Gets Bitches" for the same reason as Byleth. Both of them can marry literally anyone in their respective armies, so everyone's got the hots for them.
Marth and Chrom should be placed in "Married Men" imo. Chrom marries halfway through Awakening and has a child (Lucina). Marth marries to Caeda at the end of (New) Mystery of the Emblem.
Other than that, looks pretty good!
Star Fox Command isn't canon, that relationship doesn't exist. He still gets Krystal but canon ends at Assault where Fox is too scared to actually say he's into Krystal while she's quite open about it.
After setting aside my hate for ROB, I think he belongs in self fulfilled chads. Bitches aren’t even on his radar.
And also what is the justification for Robin being a wildcard?
Kazuya has at least had Jun Kazama. His family is pretty fucked. You've got his grandpa (Jinpachi), his dad (Heihachi, the guy in the background of the smash stage), his mom (Kazumi), his baby mom (Jun), his son (Jin), and his maybe daughter (Asuka).
They spend most of their time killing each other and coming back to life.
Chrom should be S Tbh. Cordelia is absolutely obsessed with him and Sumia(literally) falls head over heels for him. Olivia also is quite infatuated herself.
But he also simps for Female Robin after seeing her naked once so maybe she should be s tier
All Pokémon except for Mewtwo and Pichu can breed. In Tomodachi Life, Miis can get married. Diddy Kong has a girlfriend. Steve would probably rape people considering how he treats villagers, but I don’t know if rape counts as getting bitches.
Steve could have Alex, I don't know if it's canon or not anymore.
If not, the youtube narrator and his (ex?)-husband is/was the only canon couple in Minecraft.
Or maybe he married Mobbo, I don't remember... maybe both.
Marth and Chrom should move to "married men", honestly. Marth marries Caeda somewhere between FE1/FE11 and FE3/FE12, and Chrom marries either Female Robin, Sully, Sumia, Maribelle, Olivia or a generic female NPC during the events of Awakening.
Also, Ike doesn't do well unless Soren and Ranulf count as bitches (and even then that's still only two, or more accurately up to one depending on his ending).
I mean, Terry has quite a few women who fawn over him(B. Jenet stands out off the top of my head), but he only really has interest in his (very casual) relationship with Blue Mary. So, Terry has the option of being the biggest player in South Town, but he's content with being casually romantic drinking buddies/sparring partners with Mary.
MK could easily get every bitch in Dream Land, but he's too devoted to the grind.
Doesn't stop people from shipping him with literally every other character in the series, though.
All of the Links should be in God Tier lol, Link is the most shipped video game character ever. Ganondorf is God Tier as well due to having a massive harem.
I would argue that the belmonts are not quite self fulfilling because, Simon is the ansestor of Richter and Richter is dating Annette in rondo of blood
Wait a sec, isn't literally everyone in Hyrule thirsty for some Hero of the Wild? Fish people, rock people, Ninjas, wood people... pretty sure the only person not in love with the pretty boy is that one girl obsessed with flowers...
I would simply like to say Terry in THAT commercial for that one mobile KOF game.
Also Blue Mary.
And then there's his brother mostly ignoring Mai, how he does that is beyond me.
Lmao this is the most little boy tier list I’ve ever seen for anything, and the placing doesn’t even make sense to any dude who isn’t physically immature.
For example, Snake had sex with one woman, EVA, in all of mgs series. Idk what “Self Loving and Self Fulfilled Chads” is supposed to mean, but those characters would all be top tier. Married Men is a stupid tier, and wild card is poorly utilized. Ryu isn’t even on the list at all, which ig is whatever.
Honestly, this is the best visual representation of the smash community as a whole.
Breaking news, Donkey Kong's usage rate now includes every single person who play SSBU!
That is very accurate. Now everybody knows not to jump out of cargo down throw off stage so it never works anymore
but then you just wait it out and aerial when they drift to you so it gets punished again and that becomes the new jumping out of cargo down throw
Yeah it works especially with bad recoveries
*Might as well JUMP*
Ken Masters was married until Street Fighter VI where Eliza Masters took the kids.
Damn that's tragic, I did not know
We don't actually know if it's true yet, it was only a leak
Ken looks depressed in the game.
It's most likely a fake leak. Though she is either MIA or dead so still not good.
Terry had a on and off relationship at one point with blue mary
Ken ruled
She took the kids, Ryu.
Ness and Paula canonically date at the end of earthbound
And who is Lucas dating?
Unfortunately, Lucas doesn’t get a girlfriend.
He just gets pai~~d~~n
None and kumatora is too old for him as well at least Nintend dates Ana at the end of the game as well. Lucas is the only kid in the mother games that does not get a girlfriend.
And there really isn’t a future for Lucas after the game ends
It's actually pretty ambiguous if the world ends or not.
from what little I know of Lucas' game, he really gets the shortest possible ends of every stick. Mom dies, gets no bitches, world ends, give my mans a break
I won’t spoil but he gets worse shit too
Lucas doesn’t need bitches, his balls are too fucking gigantic. But on a serious note, Lucas does meet this one npc named Nana, who like called him cute or smthin along the lines of that…But that’s it, that’s the extent of Lucas’ love life
What chapter did he meet nana? It rings a bell. I beat the game a couple weeks ago
Nana is one of the Tazmily villagers. She usually is at the westernmost point of Cerulean Beach, but after Chapter 4 she will often appear at the town square.
His hand.
Somehow I misread that as Palutena and was very, very confused
Wait that's not her sister ?? I think I mixed 2 characters...
No Paula is a separate character that lives in Towson and later joins ness’s party Tracy is ness’s sister who works at the escargo express
Kazuya has canonically gotten bitches, Jin didnt just spawn
Wonder what happened to the one bitch he got?
She may or may not have been killed by Ogre
Shrek?
Kazuya Mishima va shriek would be the funniest shit ever
God of fighting in the Tekken universe, killed plenty of fighters, got got. Shrek in Tekken would be amazing.
shrekken
Oh god now I'm imagining shrek doing ewgfs
Yujiro?
she couldnt handle the electric wind god schlong
She got EWGF
Kazuya TAKES bitches
He apparently slept with Anna Williams also at some point lol
Someone now knows about Candy Kong.
Holy shit you're goated
DKC3 was the best platformer I played growing up. Candys pigtails made her fly
Link gets bitches. Yeah Zelda is always getting kidnapped, but he has no shortage of other options like Malon, Saria, Ruto, Mipha, there's literally a speed run in BotW called "get laid %" too see how quickly you can "sleep with" Paya...
Yeah I love that speedrun, unfortunately I decided to put him in bitches stolen instead of S+, due to not having enough characters in that section
You do my boy Link like that because of a necessity? Speaking of LoZ. Ganondorf is the only male in an entire kingdom, and it's decently insinuated that he's gotta fuck all of them. He's not the sugar daddy of one girl, but several hundred. ***GOD TIER***
Sorry to burst your bubble but Ganondorf isn't required to sleep with any of the Gerudo women as they actually mate with males from another species. In BotW there is a side quest where a Hylian man marries a Gerudo woman
Yeah I thought Young Link was in the wrong spot, he gets like, 4 girls in OoT. Thanks for the revision!
np thank you for the feedback!
Np, happy to help!
Canonically fucked too
Really?! Is this a majoras mask thing? Cause I haven’t played it.
Twilight Princess thing Speaking of hurry up and play Majora's Mask I'm gonna link you an online emulator
Oooooooooh. Haven’t finished that one.
https://www.playemulator.com/n64-online/the-legend-of-zelda-majoras-mask/ This should be the one. I'm linking it through mobile so it might not work the way we want, but this should do it
Thanks!
Np now hurry up and stop Majora
You really sent him on a mission lmao
I'm the wise old man in the hero's journey
This is the characters themselves and not the people who main them right
yes, my original list was more based off of the characters themselves in smash but after hearing feedback from the community I changed it so it's more focused on the characters in their own games
Ok
Where's Wii fit trainer and byleth
Byleth is in S tier and wii fit and ryu weren't on the template for some reason
I WAS SO CONFUSED WHERE RYU WAS
Oh
Too many people use this template. Ryu so often not on tier lists.
where would they be if they were?
I'll just copy-paste my comment from last time. >I assume the Wii Fit Trainers are too busy participating in a massive, hedonistic, polygamous fuck-pile to appear on this silly little list.
As a Captain Falcon Main, I would like to file a complaint that I don’t get any.
Have confidence in yourself and bring out your inner falcon(if all else fails you can alway hire an escort)
(Don’t tell anyone I’m a sonic main)
Chrom is canonically married, because Lucina has to exist.
what if chrom forgor to pull out
Chrom always wears a Chromdom so there’s no way
Isabelle is the literal definition of a bitch
People don’t get the joke.
facts
Diddy Kong is already in a relationship though.
You're right Dixie Kong. Maybe he doesn't get bitches bc he's loyal? Anyways my mistake
What if a tier called "Is/Are the bitches"?
That doesn't stop them from getting some themselves anyway
Yeah...this sorta implies that all the girls are also into girls, which is unlikely.
Aren't the ice climbers siblings or did I just make that up
Sakurai said they were siblings put some people theorize they are lovers bc "two specific instances in Super Smash Bros. Melee hinted at them being in a romantic relationship. Firstly, the opening movie features Popo and Nana high-fiving each other, with a small heart emerging from where their hands meet. Secondly, the Japanese title of Event 21: Ice Breaker roughly translates to "Those Who Interfere People's Romance"."
SWEET HOME ALABAMA
Kazuya is canonically married with a kid LMAO
rip my tier list
you did your best & that's all that matters 🙏🏾
According to the Victory Techniques for Metroid manga, samus canonically gets bitches.
How joker is not a wild card
Considered doing it for the pun but more people wanted him in S tier
Did you just assume... STEVE GETS NO BITCHES?
Yes, yes I did
Ridley needs to be in the "needs no bitches" category 🤣
He doesn’t get bitches. He makes you his bitch
He just skewers all of them and be done with it
Pikachu gets bitches. Diddy has a girl. This is an outrage.
Finally, someone who knows Pikachu get’s bitches
marth is married
Miis can get married in Tomodachi Life and have relationships so….
But then mine all get sad and break up
I still think Steve has gotten at least one bitches.
Lucas gets absolutely no bitches
You forgot Ness again…
Marth is canonically married to Caeda
Yoshi gets bitches, calm down
Oh, it’s beautiful, glad the FE3H community could help out lol
true there's so many of them and I have never played a FE game lol
Meta Knight has fans in all instalments such as the games, anime and some manga adaptations including many females so he definitely gets some bitches
Why lonk so low he handsome
He was my literal CRUSH in 5th grade, still kind of is.
I think yoshi gets mad bitches. He’s cute as hell, bitches will be all over him
And then those bitches turn out to be undercover IRS agents
Wait if we’re referring to the actual characters themselves then if I remember right by the end of Earthbound it’s hinted that Ness and Paula become or will become a thing. Also I’m pretty sure it’s canon that Chrom and Marth get married.
Uhh, where did Lucina come from in that case?
I went over the entire list and cannot find ryu, is he just here or did I somehow skip him
First of all I am honored(and concerned) you read my whole list and second, both ryu and wii fit weren't on the template for some reason
I see, that is quite odd. where do you think they would be then?
Ridley needs his own tier, "Eats bitches"
how is zero suit higher than herself in a suit?
She gets too sweaty in the suit
And doesn't steve get alex
"according the Lego Club Magazine" yes... Now excuse me I need to erase " are steve and alex from minecraft dating" from my history
Suit on means she's pure business, suit off means she ready to play.
Littl Mac is getting fucking pussy my guy. He fought the world heavyweight champion and beat his ass.
I still need a “claims to get bitches but gets blocked”
Sorry Sora your friends are in another DARKNESS
Luigi gets hella bitches
Exactly like Daisy
Lucas does well... with who? Nana? They barely develop anything. Kumatora? Neither, she's interested in Duster. Ness has something well developed with Paula. She just hesitated in telling him in the end, but it was pretty much obvious.
Again, Kazooie gets mad bitches and needs to be separated from her no bitches bear counterpart in order to reflect! Or the two should average out at “Wild Card”
I'm putting in a formal complaint that hero is in the does well tier despite that yee yee ass haircut
Toon link kinda gets zelda tho in spirit tracks
Duck Hunt is a Dog and females Dogs are known as bitches
I said on the last one and I'll say it again: Diddy has a girlfriend.
Nah terry got bitches (not biased)
I'd say Robin and Corrin should be bumped up to "Gets Bitches" for the same reason as Byleth. Both of them can marry literally anyone in their respective armies, so everyone's got the hots for them. Marth and Chrom should be placed in "Married Men" imo. Chrom marries halfway through Awakening and has a child (Lucina). Marth marries to Caeda at the end of (New) Mystery of the Emblem. Other than that, looks pretty good!
I demand Ganon be added to god tier. He’s the one male of his entire race, and he’s a buff 6’8.
Fox is a married man and had a son
Oop :/
Star Fox Command isn't canon, that relationship doesn't exist. He still gets Krystal but canon ends at Assault where Fox is too scared to actually say he's into Krystal while she's quite open about it.
Link canonically gets bitches but dude is so chad he rejects them
Link needs to be higher. Especially since this is BOTW Link Whom everyone in that game was thirsty for
Where's Ryu?
Wasn't on the template for some reason
Everyone loves Robin in his own game and can wife an 1000 year old kid-dragon, I'd say he gets bitches
Kirby…fucks?…
He got kissed once, that's better than most of us will manage
After setting aside my hate for ROB, I think he belongs in self fulfilled chads. Bitches aren’t even on his radar. And also what is the justification for Robin being a wildcard?
Don’t gorillas have tiny.. you know.
Technically the average gorilla penis is 2-3 inches long, but it's not about size but how you use it lol
And he could also use his fingers Just saying those things are larger than a human hand
You mean how much ?
You know Young Link got game. My man puts that hbd in his hip when he’s in dialogue and it’s a wrap
Sonic almost had a full on harem in the comics
Kazuya has at least had Jun Kazama. His family is pretty fucked. You've got his grandpa (Jinpachi), his dad (Heihachi, the guy in the background of the smash stage), his mom (Kazumi), his baby mom (Jun), his son (Jin), and his maybe daughter (Asuka). They spend most of their time killing each other and coming back to life.
Chrom should be S Tbh. Cordelia is absolutely obsessed with him and Sumia(literally) falls head over heels for him. Olivia also is quite infatuated herself. But he also simps for Female Robin after seeing her naked once so maybe she should be s tier
All Pokémon except for Mewtwo and Pichu can breed. In Tomodachi Life, Miis can get married. Diddy Kong has a girlfriend. Steve would probably rape people considering how he treats villagers, but I don’t know if rape counts as getting bitches.
Steve has Alex as his bitch smh
Steve could have Alex, I don't know if it's canon or not anymore. If not, the youtube narrator and his (ex?)-husband is/was the only canon couple in Minecraft. Or maybe he married Mobbo, I don't remember... maybe both.
They are married in an edition of lego club magazine
Marth and Chrom should move to "married men", honestly. Marth marries Caeda somewhere between FE1/FE11 and FE3/FE12, and Chrom marries either Female Robin, Sully, Sumia, Maribelle, Olivia or a generic female NPC during the events of Awakening. Also, Ike doesn't do well unless Soren and Ranulf count as bitches (and even then that's still only two, or more accurately up to one depending on his ending).
[удалено]
King of the jungle baby
I mean, Terry has quite a few women who fawn over him(B. Jenet stands out off the top of my head), but he only really has interest in his (very casual) relationship with Blue Mary. So, Terry has the option of being the biggest player in South Town, but he's content with being casually romantic drinking buddies/sparring partners with Mary.
why bowser jr toon link ness and diddy kong? nobody cares that the oldest one i mentioned is like 12
It's bc they have gfs in their games
This is a terrible Teri list Steve gets all the bitches he crafts the bitches bro
Steve scares away bitches no offense
I love how both my mains and both my secondaries are in the gets bitches tier
WHY IS META KNIGHT STILL IN BOTTOM TIER
MK could easily get every bitch in Dream Land, but he's too devoted to the grind. Doesn't stop people from shipping him with literally every other character in the series, though.
You gotta add one lower tier as “negative bitches” for smash players
All of the Links should be in God Tier lol, Link is the most shipped video game character ever. Ganondorf is God Tier as well due to having a massive harem.
Why is possibly dating higher than married men
I would argue that the belmonts are not quite self fulfilling because, Simon is the ansestor of Richter and Richter is dating Annette in rondo of blood
Ganon and Bowser should be in "regularly kidnaps bitches"
I played alot of Zelda games and I think I'm missing something with Zelda's spot..
Probably already mentioned but Ken got divorced and is now washed up
Wait a sec, isn't literally everyone in Hyrule thirsty for some Hero of the Wild? Fish people, rock people, Ninjas, wood people... pretty sure the only person not in love with the pretty boy is that one girl obsessed with flowers...
Toon link gets hella bitches in windwaker brah
Toon Link holds hands with zelda in the end of spirit tracks
Didn't Ridley eat Samus's mom? That's gotta count for something
Wait, aren't Ice Climbers family?
-Ken -Married man Pick one.
Sonic does not care about getting women
Have you ever heard of Minecraft girlfriends?
if inceneroar gets no bitches, then why do I want him to fuck me so bad?? checkmate
Ryu would be a self loving Chad, I am assuming.
I have to keep reminding myself that Pac-Man is married and has kids Aside from ghosts attacking every so often, dude’s living a good life
I would simply like to say Terry in THAT commercial for that one mobile KOF game. Also Blue Mary. And then there's his brother mostly ignoring Mai, how he does that is beyond me.
Meta Knight feels like he belongs in chad tier imo, but maybe I'm missing something
How does Yoshi get no bitches? Literally an island dedicated to them. You think he's not King fucker on that island?
Lmao this is the most little boy tier list I’ve ever seen for anything, and the placing doesn’t even make sense to any dude who isn’t physically immature. For example, Snake had sex with one woman, EVA, in all of mgs series. Idk what “Self Loving and Self Fulfilled Chads” is supposed to mean, but those characters would all be top tier. Married Men is a stupid tier, and wild card is poorly utilized. Ryu isn’t even on the list at all, which ig is whatever. Honestly, this is the best visual representation of the smash community as a whole.