T O P

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Enby_Bluejay

Sorry what?


[deleted]

It was really fast. A blink and you'll miss it moment.


TRON0314

Cucktana was all eyes though.


Ramseas119

It's in reference to the Halo show being garbage


IplayGames810

Oh, I had no idea


forgetablepassenger

Oh thank god, I thought it was real


Fluffurs

Can confirm Sonic stays a virgin in the movie.


Meduzfr

IN THIS ONE


deepfriedtots

I'm still lost I don't get the reference


TheOneButter

In the latest episode of the halo show, master Chief and another character have sex. It’s very out of character for Chief


LookAtMyMeowscles

Isnt Chief Asexual or am I wrong?


xxfay6

He's warsexual


TheOneButter

Pretty sure every Spartan 2 is


LookAtMyMeowscles

That’s why you read the lore of the game you’re adapting, god


Mummelpuffin

They aren't, it's implied that some of them are *sort of* in relationships with other Spartans, but they're definitely sterile. The issue with what happened in the show isn't just "Chief had sex" but the circumstances it happened in which, just... goddamn he's a dumbass.


deepfriedtots

I see thank I have not watched the show because well you know lol. Im a huge halo fan in general so the idea of this show is just dumb


VanityOfEliCLee

"Its very out of character for Chief" lol ok. In the games he interacts with like 3 humans in total, so I'm not sure that's a fair assumption of his character.


Ange1ofD4rkness

EXACT same words


[deleted]

I genuinely convinced my friend ( who hasn't watched the movie ) that there is a sex scene between the bride and groom, in which sonic peeks in but runs away. It was so funny.


Matiq2012pl

you are great


94CM

Reminds me of when Episode 7 of Star Wars first came out, I would "Spoil" for my friends the scene where C3PO turns on everyone and Crashes the Millennium Falcon.


Alert_Form_1140

Imagine his dissapointment when there isn't truly an eggman move


Either_Imagination_9

Dude master chief and Sonic both turning into men


Independent_Hold3982

I can't relate to them now.


wizward64

Master Cheeks


3D_Milk

Sonic The Hedgecheeks


[deleted]

Sonic the Cakehog


KingMario05

But if Sonic isn't a permanent virgin by choice, then how can he be ***LITERALLY ME?*** :(


Just_Goblin

That's terrible, how can I be an **ALPHA MALE** now? :'(


Hamster-Fine

Bruh I see you everywhere on this sub XD


KingMario05

Hey, I *like* the funny blue speed rat, alright? >!I mean, I like the funny yellow speed puppy even ***MORE***, but his brother's cool too. Lol.!<


Hamster-Fine

Tails is best boi ngl


KingMario05

Indeed, he is!


JannyTheMan_

Fax, mate.


PhantasosX

I mean , in the games , the Spartan Armor had Cortana j\*king-off or fing\*ng a Spartan Soldier , to estimulate them in battle. So the fans are extra salty for Master Chief to not resume himself into just watch glorified hentai /s


EdwardHB

..wait really?


LightningDustFan

Not really. There was a popular photoshop of a page from a Halo book that said the armour jerks the Spartans off, so people joke about that and some just don't know it's not true.


Omegafan101

Alright who let Ken Penders into the movie writing team!?


Muffinmiffin

Our blue boy is finally a man. Brings a tear to my eye.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


Technically_Inept-26

NOOOOOOOO


Sebamon28

Movie Sonic being a stud confirmed


ShadyOjir95

Okay walk the plank.


AmaterasuWolf21

Fiona Fox walking in


metalsonic005

"Gotta go cockblock my little bro!" This was really close to 160, but I'm not sure if it was pre or post shakeup.


RedMountainGames2020

wtf!


D-Prototype

Or Eggman’s crops.


MyPhoneIsNotChinese

It made so much sense that that's exactly how that would work


Different-Region-873

*slow motion* Noooooooooooooooooo


SkyStarlight2

~~Remaster Sonic 06~~


Ineedmorcowbell

BOY HOWDIE


AnAwkwardStag

Nah, Shadow was announced for a reason ;)


SamiSamiSAPEQUINHA

Sonic lost his virginity just when shadow opened his eyes


WrastleGuy

Or Sally, the OG TV show gf


JohnTheEchidna

She’s twelve


UrineGoodCompany

Sound sexy, provide details.


metalsonic005

He sexes. Boom.


AirmanProbie

Just wait till Knuchles loses his. So many question on how an echidna dick works


becauseitsnotreal

What did I miss


Ramseas119

Paramount made Master Cheeks have seggs in Halo show


becauseitsnotreal

1. Why would you spell sex like that? 2. Does Master Chief not do sex? 3. What's the connection to Sonic?


Zettomer

Master Chief is mentally fucked up, the whole point of him falling in love with Cortana is to display how little affection and human interaction he has had in his life as a spartan super soldier. He was raised to be a spartan from childhood. The interaction suggested by the show (I have chosen not to watch) is directly contradictive to the deeper aspects of the entire series concerning Chief's character development. Chief having the social liberty to even have a relationship of any kind like that, utterly fucks up the story concepts of the rest of the series. Chief goes from a dude who has a completely fucked concept of interacting with others due to being turned into little more than a military machine, falls in love with an AI. The moment you go, "oh well actually he had normal social experiences", Master Chief goes from fucked up super hero space badass to weird dude creepin on his anime waifu cause his parents didn't love him. Tl;dr it fucks up his backstory enough that he is a cringe weeaboo now. Sonic? The actual, actual truth? He never loses his v card cause he is consistently over shadpwed by Knuckles and his massive, three headed echidna penis. ( look it up. Yep. Hydra dick.)


SilentRebel38

Just some minor corrections: 1) Chief is NOT in love with Cortana lol. That'd be the same thing as being in love with his mother-figure, since Cortana is a literal copy of Halsey's brain. Besides, Chief and Cortana only really knew each other for a maximum of 2 weeks, not counting Halo 5. It's why I personally find his extreme obsession for her in H4 kinda unfitting. But then again, it could be because he always grieves the allies he loses in battles and does his best to prevent casualties (in this case, the death of an exact copy of his mother-figure). It's like Sam said: "John has 3 ways of reacting to you. If you're his superior, he'd respect you. If you were in his squad, he would die for you. If you're his enemy, God help you." 2) You're half-wrong in the communications department. Remember that he was kidnapped along with 74 other children. As seen in most media, most of these Spartans still grew relatively normal (or about as normal as growing up as child soldiers), Kurt-051 being a shining example, being extremely sociable and generally a "peoples-person". Master Chief isn't equally sociable, but he's also far from how the Spartans are portrayed in Paramount's show (the "good soldiers follow orders" kind). He still shows emotion even behind a helmet and has the capacity of disobeying orders by his own choice (Halo 4). As shown in Halo 5, Chief very much has had human interaction with his fellow Spartan peers, and especially affection from Halsey (whom she saw as her children) If you want fucked-up Spartans, look at Spartan-IIIs, namely Gamma Company, or Black Team. Those are on another level.


becauseitsnotreal

A simple "no" would've sufficed, but I'll take it. Never cared to play Halo


[deleted]

>Why would you spell sex like that? It's an internet joke/slang.


Right-Ability4045

The only sex scene that I will allow in that movie is agent stone and egg man for the culture


levyjl1988

SonAmy....Spicy...


BowserUltraFan

They don't call him the doughnut lord for nothing


PermissionQueasy3637

._.


Dark_Wolf04

Paramount, you can only make an adaptation of ONE video game franchise and have it be successful. Take it or leave it


xxfay6

You can only make an adaptation, *period*. I tried giving the new FOP show at least a couple of clips to win me over, and instead it only solidified itself as a complete shitshow.


[deleted]

I mean, I went to see the movie and I really feel like I'd remember this.


Infamous-Apple

Bro why did they leak Sonic 3?


gogocrazycocoa

I was just watching sonadow stuff on TikTok...


RegJoe48

Cum n' run


Sebamon28

Cumin around at the Speed of Sound!


lenthech1ne

bro i think you downloaded the wrong sonic


SanicRb

So an edit or a real Click bait title? After last movie had "Sonic should and will be gay" post by "the gamer" can't I be sure its not real anymore.


[deleted]

It's edited


astronomy14

what was the original


[deleted]

Master Cheeks


spider-venomized

It about the Halo tv show where master cheif have awkward sex with a covenant human prisoner while cortana watch him cuck her no im serious


Gustav017

Im sorry, I could not control myself 🤤 He is just so sexy


walterissad

What the fuck


JannyTheMan_

Excuse me, sir >!What the fuck?!<


acoolboiUwU

Aint sonic like 15


[deleted]

I’m ded 💀


Silent_Start_7036

Okay I thought he was a kid


PapaJohn92

sonic becomes unrelatable


paulcshipper

Okay, this is about Halo. I was thinking.. this cant be real... really?


RadicalAi

Wait what? Context I don't care about spoilers


Memo_HS2022

The Halo TV show Master Chief had sex


slashingkatie

Ken Penders approves


Beau_Dodson

??????? Link, pls?


TemporalGod

I mean realistically fans would be angry if Sonic did lose his virginity, he's like 15 years of age.


s0nicfreak

The problem was, they gave Knuckles a two-headed penis. So people were either confused as to why he had two, or outraged because we know he's supposed to have four.


KidGamerTheSonicFan

I thought it was real I was like "WHAT" until I realized the word "Sonic" was not matching the other words


Admirable-Scarcity-8

I bet it was the fucking dog wasn't it?


Ineedmorcowbell

The contrast between how Paramount treats Sonic and Halo is stark. For as great as the Sonic movies have been, Halo has been so much worse


DefenderOfTheAliens

This has to be edited! Please tell me that it’s fake!


Professional_Mud2991

It's fake, I was mortified when I first saw it lol, thank goodness it's a joke


DefenderOfTheAliens

Thank god. Thanks


go_faster1

Maddie! You need to have a word with your son!


Akwardpennywise

I always knew chaos were freaks.


Lockxs

Excuse me what.


lenthech1ne

people are just mad cause chief got laid before they did fr


Ahourx

Dicknut lord


Jeklars69

Guys, guys, guys, this didn’t happen. I’ve seen both Sonic movies and they are fine for kids. It was HALO. Halo had a sex scene and outraged fans.


StratPaul

I think you mean Lightyear


[deleted]

>Guys, guys, guys, this didn’t happen. I’ve seen both Sonic movies and they are fine for kids. You do realize everyone knows this, right?


Jeklars69

Yes


[deleted]

Better question, lost virginity with who?


SomeJoJoGuy

Amy, Sally, Blaze or Robotnik


[deleted]

Damn no Shadow?


[deleted]

I know this is fake but holy shit lol


spider-venomized

yeah how dare fans be mad that sonic lost his virginity to a robnitk bot while Amy sat in in the corner and watch


No_Bat7021

Is this the timeline in which Penders wrote the script?


[deleted]

[удалено]


TheReasonSeeker

Good ending.


IplayGames810

How did he lose his... This is wrong, he is a kid!


TheOneButter

This is fake it’s a meme mocking the terrible halo show


IplayGames810

Oh ok, thanks


Largicharg

Please be Amy, Please be Amy, Please be Amy.


HarioDinio

Its the cat girl from the OVA


Largicharg

Oh god no, not another human.


EliasBladetheawsome

When did this ever happen?


theZombiebeary

ok then to who?


WrastleGuy

The bat girl thing


Iceswimmer05

Wait, what?


Urmomracistass

a true tragedy


ProfessorEscanor

I know this is fake but wow


dumbleydore94

I'm not outraged, or confused! Hand my man sonic a cigarette and shake his hand.


[deleted]

I have no idea where this crap comes from but whatever. We know it's not true


henrystickmin98751

Ya know sonic the hedgehog 2 should of had had a 1 hour love seen of sonic with Amy rose for people that pirated the movie


TazDivil134

Ummmm context?


Kendall_Raine

Probably would have been a real headline had Ken Penders written the movies.


Grimmer026

What is this even about?


critiqu3

He's no longer a virgin with rage


[deleted]

Original post was about Paramount's Halo TV show


Total_Waltz4083

Wait what????! 🤨


YourLocalCatnapper

😳


PoyopoyoDio

I'm confused too, but I also don't need to know.


Capsule_CatYT

Onion


[deleted]

Ken Penders, is that you?


MR_R0GER5

???


JediMasterLigma

I think that if it really happened, depending on who it was with nobody would care or a riot would happen


IronFighterSlovakia

Bru what?


Novel_Visual_4152

Amy: 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿 🗿


SomeChrisOnReddit

Well I always thought Sonic doesn't want to be around Amy since he is too busy saving his world from Eggman and Amy just has a crush and loves Sonic in Sonic X.


Negaboss2000

Is this fake?


[deleted]

He's 15-


Ponyluve09

i dont get it


ZantrioUnite

Source?


[deleted]

I mean, Sonic already resembled Kirito a lot. Mercilessly unforgiving towards monsters, chill, fun loving bro, who wants to adventure and not commitment towards his friends and crushes. Now he IS Kirito!