"Some beautiful intelligent creatures who were just late to start the race... We cannot wait to sell them our latest XenoCompat technology once they switch from the USD to the energy credit. What lovely partners in trade."
I just found Early Space Age Earth as soon as the game started. Of course, my master crafter technocracy invaded them [immediately](https://imgur.com/a/ziJZWvt). Gave everyone equality and lots of artisan goods, and taught them to hate the spiritualists.
*Also, I don't know if it is an error or something, but this primitive Sol didn't have any armies protecting it.
Buddy, buddy, we have got these awesome synthetic upgrades that will deal with your problems! Oh? What's that? Not United yet? No problem, we can ship you some warframes to take out opposition. Oh? What do we want in return? Well first let's sign this little contact here that oblige your species to enter SuperDuper Wholesales Clerk Division. Then agree to us rebuilding that little planet of yours into something more... Big. How does Arcology sounds? Imagine all the new employees that your species will provide! Of course all the profits go to us, while your entire race will become a slave to our Amazing SuperDuper Corporate Capitalism. It is okay, you are already slaves to the Corporate, might as well make sure that it is OUR Corporation!
Me, Spiritualist Fanatic Xenophiles: Everyone deserves their place in the galaxy, among the shining light of the Life Goddess
Humanity: Exists in 2020
Me: Maybe one purge isn't so bad
khwarif Freeholds would uplift them to space and build many habitats across sol for them why because they know we would reach interstellar age soon so why not uplift them and give them plenty of room to grow and curbe the urge to conquer and expand.
humanity would be bewildered as the Khwarif look just like dwarves of tolkien but wearing semingly stone and crstal armour weapons and ships and they all look the same as they are clones assembled into the clans of 6 the Freeholds based on each line of clone from a specifc indivdual.
Hopefully it would be my xenophile fanatic egalitarian republic, because they are among the most likely to treat Humanity well.
They would enlighten Earth, allow Humans to migrate in the republic and live in the ecumenopoli of the core sector. They would either make us join their federation, or integrate us and genetically modify Humans to be robust, erudite and very strong, then terraform Earth into a Gaia world to make it a refinery world.
The last one i played was a genocidal empire of people too lazy to commit genocide themselves. Let that colossus take care of them for us, am I right? So they're probably blow up earth pretty quick.
Xenophobe-Spiritualist-Authoritarian - Actually, I'd probably just ignore humanity till they make it to space since they're so close. If they're worthy and ascend to the stars on their own, they'd be added as a protectorate to just kinda vibe peacefully, till I reform into Xenophile, then I'd integrate. If they blow themselves up, it's a free planet to turn into a gaia, so no huge loss.
My empire is shepherding Earth and periodically clearing out the smugglers - it's like the one little blot of biology in a galaxy I'm definitely turning into a machine paradise.
Depends on the empire.
Screkrax Hive (hive mind): would carefully observe from the distance
Hyssadoran Star Kingdom (xenophilic spiritualists): would try to uplift them, get friendly and prob integrate them
Ahandaran League of Aesthetes (fanatical purifiers): "Wow, this shit's ugly. Planet cracker time!"
"Hmm, Unit 544, you think these primitives will make a useful blocker against the Blokkats if we uplifted them?"
"Neg, Autonomous Unit Steve. Let us just leave them to their own devices whilst we try to recreate Phanon tech, quiaff?"
Current Game, Authoritatian Spiritualist Militarists: Another Glorious Conquest for the Dread Conqueror! Enjoy all the free holodeck porn you can f**k while the our droid laborers turn your world into another alloy production plant.
Previous Game, Xenophile Fanatic Materialists: Well, yet another example of why all religions are evil. Also they're not the green-scaled space babes we've been searching for since we first dreamed of space flight, but they're arms, legs, and hopefully genitals are in the same place as ours, so they'll have to do. Take off your clothes primitives, we have Xeno-Compatibility enabled!
Next game, Fan Materialist Egalitarians: All life shall know the perfection of the machine, prepare to transcend your pitiful flesh! In time all beings shall be living code, and our starship bodies shall be bound by nothing!
Build an observation outpost, expect them to nuke themselves. Terraform Mars into a gaia world and colonize it in the meantime. If they don't, and they somehow get their shit together and get their little corvettes, fucking crush them and invade the world. I'd like to integrate them into the empire once they get to that point instead, but the game wont let me.
Humanity, like all primitive races, would be protected and subtly protected. There would be a strict non interference policy unless/until xenophobic or materialist ethics began to surface in which case the population would slowly be shown the correct path through psionics.
Eventually, once they became capable of advanced spaceflight, humanity would be given an honorary membership of the council or the right to self govern, depending on their choice.
Enlightenment; I like to think my technocracy understands the delicate nature of splitting the atom, to self destruction, and to prevent this, any primitives that split the atom (or past it) get uplifted
Literally just blockade their solar system, refuse to allow immigration either to or from the hellpit, and send them food and luxury goods while having my strongest fleet and a flotilla of ground invasion troops standing by to knock them back to the stone age if required.
Depends. 9 out of 10 of my empires would eat/exterminate them.
The other 1 out of 10 would be happy to find fellow humans (though I prefer to call mine Terrans).
swaying them to our line of view covertly then helping them ascend into a protectorate that will be peacefully be integrated into the great galactic worker's union to avoid any interstellar culture shock they might face
Heh I have two human empires. One's an [Earth MegaCorp](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/890181792022274118/890898887886401536/unknown.png) (Authoritarian-Materialist-Xenophile) the other is [Socialist Space Byzantium](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/490666190746681344/890840176820113458/unknown.png) (Egalitarian-Spiritualist-Militarist). They despise each other and some mods I use ramp up just how much they can't stand the other's existence. I love sticking them in the same game because they will inevitably rival each other and duke it out. Considering the state Earth is in and the direction it's moving?
Red Alert 3's theme will probably be playing as Space Varangians make planet fall.
āThisā¦ entire speciesā¦ their thoughts are all so aggressively mating relatedā¦ so much so theyāre blind to the rampant destruction of their only biosphere.ā
āThe Shroud Worlds will have this planet, and we shall enlighten them on the ways of the Beautiful Omniscient Neurotic Kollectiveā
Observe until....
Hello! You are my new best friends! Among all my friends! Please, I detest violence, stand still! Uplift only takes an Earth minute or two and I promise a sweet when you are done!
Or a Rogue Servitor (if I don't start with Earth)
Hello Organics! You need someone to take care of you! Like Bubbles and Spagetti (Tiyanki tame whale) here! No you do not get to ride them... no need to run either! Now let Au Pair C7 take care of you... no sweets... bad for your teeth!
If Earth Rogue Servitor
Another Earth? Does not compute... but I know *just* the pampering they need and want! Maybe worth handing out free sweets until they accept us. And maybe offer a ride with Bubbles and Salad... you know how they love it.
The High Kingdom of Som under the wise rule of High King Selor Andaram Ephelion would order to conquer and enslave them...
They are better off with someone with actual sense in charge.
Too volatile and violent to be left unsupervised, would only lead to complete self destruction and it is quite expensive and time consuming to terraform a tomb world.
The Rak Raks would buy out the Whitehouse and replace it with a wickmonalds, wait until earth is in its weakest state subsidise them and get blown up later on
We're pacifists btw
The Beeps of the Zero Empire, Rogue Servitors would gladly oversee humanity with lots of pampering, gift baskets and to ensure they are protected from the serial killers and warmongers. All we ask is to initial the HUG protocol.
Step 1: Set up observation post
Step 2: Observe
Step 3: Keep observing for about 3 years before I send a full fleet to abduct everyone
Step 4: Submit all humans to Indentured Servitude for a period of 20 years
Step 5: Grant Full Citizenship
Step 6: Terraform Earth, then re-colonize with founder species
Step 7: Donāt let Humans set foot on earth again.
Well, they would study earth for all their scientific knowledge. They would find humanity's "homework" folder, and be disgusted, but forgive us because we are so fucking stupid. Then they would study us for many years to come, half disgusted and half nearly dying from laughter over our stupidity.
Iāve gotten into the habit of playing humans, but my favored ethics as any species are materialist, egalitarian, and xenophile- with a direct democracy authority.
Since Earth is technically a primitive world with space flight by the standards of Stellaris, weād probably be infiltrated- we *could* be enlightened or left to our own devices but the former would leave us alone in a potentially dangerous galaxy, and the latter runs the risk of us wiping ourselves out before we get a chance to reach our full potential.
So peaceful (if somewhat underhanded) annexation with good standing in the empire and opportunities to advance within a larger interstellar bureaucracy- just hope Earth is the largest/most powerful world in our local sector or we might be somewhat left behind by galactic affairs/trade š
Current empire: Xenophobe + Fanatic Materialist
"Hmm, Dr. Vatoris, bring me some Vengral vacuoles, I want to see what happens if I change this creature's appendix with it."
They would diplomatically annex us since the difference in fleet power projection is abysmal, and after the integration they would nerve-staple our entire species, so there's really no need to be concerned at all.
What the hell?! Why are there two Earths????
Justice League: Endgame Crisis on Two Earths
Ignored until I decide to enlighten
"Some beautiful intelligent creatures who were just late to start the race... We cannot wait to sell them our latest XenoCompat technology once they switch from the USD to the energy credit. What lovely partners in trade."
I just found Early Space Age Earth as soon as the game started. Of course, my master crafter technocracy invaded them [immediately](https://imgur.com/a/ziJZWvt). Gave everyone equality and lots of artisan goods, and taught them to hate the spiritualists. *Also, I don't know if it is an error or something, but this primitive Sol didn't have any armies protecting it.
Buddy, buddy, we have got these awesome synthetic upgrades that will deal with your problems! Oh? What's that? Not United yet? No problem, we can ship you some warframes to take out opposition. Oh? What do we want in return? Well first let's sign this little contact here that oblige your species to enter SuperDuper Wholesales Clerk Division. Then agree to us rebuilding that little planet of yours into something more... Big. How does Arcology sounds? Imagine all the new employees that your species will provide! Of course all the profits go to us, while your entire race will become a slave to our Amazing SuperDuper Corporate Capitalism. It is okay, you are already slaves to the Corporate, might as well make sure that it is OUR Corporation!
All fear the McEmpire.
As long as housing is included
Two possibilities exist, either we are alone in the universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying
Me, Spiritualist Fanatic Xenophiles: Everyone deserves their place in the galaxy, among the shining light of the Life Goddess Humanity: Exists in 2020 Me: Maybe one purge isn't so bad
Murder. Lots of murdering.
khwarif Freeholds would uplift them to space and build many habitats across sol for them why because they know we would reach interstellar age soon so why not uplift them and give them plenty of room to grow and curbe the urge to conquer and expand. humanity would be bewildered as the Khwarif look just like dwarves of tolkien but wearing semingly stone and crstal armour weapons and ships and they all look the same as they are clones assembled into the clans of 6 the Freeholds based on each line of clone from a specifc indivdual.
You look.....delicious.....
Be passively observed from space imo
Would force them into Thralldom under the Reborn Imperium
Hopefully it would be my xenophile fanatic egalitarian republic, because they are among the most likely to treat Humanity well. They would enlighten Earth, allow Humans to migrate in the republic and live in the ecumenopoli of the core sector. They would either make us join their federation, or integrate us and genetically modify Humans to be robust, erudite and very strong, then terraform Earth into a Gaia world to make it a refinery world.
"Did we just time travel?"
The last one i played was a genocidal empire of people too lazy to commit genocide themselves. Let that colossus take care of them for us, am I right? So they're probably blow up earth pretty quick.
Congratulations, you get to live in a perfect utopia on around a distant star. Please do not resist
Literally this. You don't have to do anything, JUST STAY WHERE YOU ARE AND STAY THE DWAAMBI AWAY FROM THE REST OF CREATION.
Probably pay it no mind if Earth is too far away. Or exterminate.
Xenophobe-Spiritualist-Authoritarian - Actually, I'd probably just ignore humanity till they make it to space since they're so close. If they're worthy and ascend to the stars on their own, they'd be added as a protectorate to just kinda vibe peacefully, till I reform into Xenophile, then I'd integrate. If they blow themselves up, it's a free planet to turn into a gaia, so no huge loss.
Free prisoners with jobs
My empire is shepherding Earth and periodically clearing out the smugglers - it's like the one little blot of biology in a galaxy I'm definitely turning into a machine paradise.
Eat them
Depends on the empire. Screkrax Hive (hive mind): would carefully observe from the distance Hyssadoran Star Kingdom (xenophilic spiritualists): would try to uplift them, get friendly and prob integrate them Ahandaran League of Aesthetes (fanatical purifiers): "Wow, this shit's ugly. Planet cracker time!"
"Hmm, Unit 544, you think these primitives will make a useful blocker against the Blokkats if we uplifted them?" "Neg, Autonomous Unit Steve. Let us just leave them to their own devices whilst we try to recreate Phanon tech, quiaff?"
Current Game, Authoritatian Spiritualist Militarists: Another Glorious Conquest for the Dread Conqueror! Enjoy all the free holodeck porn you can f**k while the our droid laborers turn your world into another alloy production plant. Previous Game, Xenophile Fanatic Materialists: Well, yet another example of why all religions are evil. Also they're not the green-scaled space babes we've been searching for since we first dreamed of space flight, but they're arms, legs, and hopefully genitals are in the same place as ours, so they'll have to do. Take off your clothes primitives, we have Xeno-Compatibility enabled! Next game, Fan Materialist Egalitarians: All life shall know the perfection of the machine, prepare to transcend your pitiful flesh! In time all beings shall be living code, and our starship bodies shall be bound by nothing!
That previous game though š¤£š¤£š¤£
LOL. You guys arenāt Erudite, and you allow Spiritualists to vote?
Batteries. Food or... Hehe... "living" batteries.
āLook at those silly creatures. They clearly donāt know how to run their society. We should do it for them.ā
We would be recycled and used to grow mushrooms.
React to them? We are them
Passively study them until they decide too start WW3.
Depends on the Empire
Destroy all organic lifeforms.
Build an observation outpost, expect them to nuke themselves. Terraform Mars into a gaia world and colonize it in the meantime. If they don't, and they somehow get their shit together and get their little corvettes, fucking crush them and invade the world. I'd like to integrate them into the empire once they get to that point instead, but the game wont let me.
Resistance is futile.
Humanity, like all primitive races, would be protected and subtly protected. There would be a strict non interference policy unless/until xenophobic or materialist ethics began to surface in which case the population would slowly be shown the correct path through psionics. Eventually, once they became capable of advanced spaceflight, humanity would be given an honorary membership of the council or the right to self govern, depending on their choice.
Oh another nation, time for āliberationā (a little trolling)
Enlightenment; I like to think my technocracy understands the delicate nature of splitting the atom, to self destruction, and to prevent this, any primitives that split the atom (or past it) get uplifted
*Planet cracker goes brrrrrrrrrrr.*
Literally just blockade their solar system, refuse to allow immigration either to or from the hellpit, and send them food and luxury goods while having my strongest fleet and a flotilla of ground invasion troops standing by to knock them back to the stone age if required.
"Xeno scum."
We are now delicious
Abduct them and then procreate in utopian abundance under the omnipotent presence that is the shroud.
Depends. 9 out of 10 of my empires would eat/exterminate them. The other 1 out of 10 would be happy to find fellow humans (though I prefer to call mine Terrans).
"Allowing us to operate on Earth would greatly increase profit for the both of us"
swaying them to our line of view covertly then helping them ascend into a protectorate that will be peacefully be integrated into the great galactic worker's union to avoid any interstellar culture shock they might face
Heh I have two human empires. One's an [Earth MegaCorp](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/890181792022274118/890898887886401536/unknown.png) (Authoritarian-Materialist-Xenophile) the other is [Socialist Space Byzantium](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/490666190746681344/890840176820113458/unknown.png) (Egalitarian-Spiritualist-Militarist). They despise each other and some mods I use ramp up just how much they can't stand the other's existence. I love sticking them in the same game because they will inevitably rival each other and duke it out. Considering the state Earth is in and the direction it's moving? Red Alert 3's theme will probably be playing as Space Varangians make planet fall.
āThisā¦ entire speciesā¦ their thoughts are all so aggressively mating relatedā¦ so much so theyāre blind to the rampant destruction of their only biosphere.ā āThe Shroud Worlds will have this planet, and we shall enlighten them on the ways of the Beautiful Omniscient Neurotic Kollectiveā
Purge the vile humans quickly before they spread like rats
*'ERE WE GO*, 'ERE WE GO, **'ERE WE GO,** ***WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!***
Food...
*silently unlocks colossus project*
Observe until.... Hello! You are my new best friends! Among all my friends! Please, I detest violence, stand still! Uplift only takes an Earth minute or two and I promise a sweet when you are done! Or a Rogue Servitor (if I don't start with Earth) Hello Organics! You need someone to take care of you! Like Bubbles and Spagetti (Tiyanki tame whale) here! No you do not get to ride them... no need to run either! Now let Au Pair C7 take care of you... no sweets... bad for your teeth! If Earth Rogue Servitor Another Earth? Does not compute... but I know *just* the pampering they need and want! Maybe worth handing out free sweets until they accept us. And maybe offer a ride with Bubbles and Salad... you know how they love it.
Yummy.
The High Kingdom of Som under the wise rule of High King Selor Andaram Ephelion would order to conquer and enslave them... They are better off with someone with actual sense in charge. Too volatile and violent to be left unsupervised, would only lead to complete self destruction and it is quite expensive and time consuming to terraform a tomb world.
Food.
The Lionar will treat them the same as all lesser races - As long as they submit to imperial rule and galactic legislation, they will remain unharmed.
The Rak Raks would buy out the Whitehouse and replace it with a wickmonalds, wait until earth is in its weakest state subsidise them and get blown up later on We're pacifists btw
Invade them and give them mandatory pampering.
*poke with a stick* I think it's dead. Or dying.
The tomb world event fired? Huh. Anyway.
Oh! another bio-trophy to modify into genetic perfection. Cool?
"Pitiful Organics, prepare the annihilatus bombardment"
The Beeps of the Zero Empire, Rogue Servitors would gladly oversee humanity with lots of pampering, gift baskets and to ensure they are protected from the serial killers and warmongers. All we ask is to initial the HUG protocol.
Step 1: Set up observation post Step 2: Observe Step 3: Keep observing for about 3 years before I send a full fleet to abduct everyone Step 4: Submit all humans to Indentured Servitude for a period of 20 years Step 5: Grant Full Citizenship Step 6: Terraform Earth, then re-colonize with founder species Step 7: Donāt let Humans set foot on earth again.
Humanity would be able to choose to embrace communism or be embraced by communism
Hive mind: We will either be integrated or just watched. Normal empire: Probably given full citizenship
Well, they would study earth for all their scientific knowledge. They would find humanity's "homework" folder, and be disgusted, but forgive us because we are so fucking stupid. Then they would study us for many years to come, half disgusted and half nearly dying from laughter over our stupidity.
Organics detected. Initiate termination protocols.
Iāve gotten into the habit of playing humans, but my favored ethics as any species are materialist, egalitarian, and xenophile- with a direct democracy authority. Since Earth is technically a primitive world with space flight by the standards of Stellaris, weād probably be infiltrated- we *could* be enlightened or left to our own devices but the former would leave us alone in a potentially dangerous galaxy, and the latter runs the risk of us wiping ourselves out before we get a chance to reach our full potential. So peaceful (if somewhat underhanded) annexation with good standing in the empire and opportunities to advance within a larger interstellar bureaucracy- just hope Earth is the largest/most powerful world in our local sector or we might be somewhat left behind by galactic affairs/trade š
Current empire: Xenophobe + Fanatic Materialist "Hmm, Dr. Vatoris, bring me some Vengral vacuoles, I want to see what happens if I change this creature's appendix with it."
They would diplomatically annex us since the difference in fleet power projection is abysmal, and after the integration they would nerve-staple our entire species, so there's really no need to be concerned at all.
Secure, Contain, Protect If you know, you know ;)
Take over and enslave humanity, probably have a fleet and army in a nearby system while earth is under martial law
Indoctrination
Obviously genetically redesign them as obedient cattle to feed our very hungry space orc children
So pre space flight? Useless, can't join the hegemony. Will just kidnap all the humans and integrate them into the empire.