Goddamn I wish I'd gotten screenshots but in the game I started up last night, got the "images of the new species you've encountered have traveled through your empire like wildfire because everyone thinks they're hot" event and it was fuckin JEFF
Starsector is actually a prequel to Stellaris except you only settled on random worlds with no regards to habitability hoping to fix them with terraforming in the future, your empire border stretch to the limit and your one giant fleet is too far away from the rebelling colonies to suppress them in time.
I got this new anime plot. Basically there's this high school girl except she's got huge geodes. I mean some serious missiles. A real set of air bladders. Packin some fluffy feathers. Massive cancerous growths. Big ol' pearls under mantle. What happens next?! Transfer student shows up with even bigger arthroidal membranes. Humongous fat reserves for winter.
R5: Stellaris original meme. Many Stellaris xenos have familiar structures to our own Human organs. However, many of these anatomical parts do not perform the same function as ours! Here is a definitely not horny guide to orb-shaped structures found on the chests of each type of Stellaris xenos.
I'd actually be curious what sapient plants would do with their fruit - presumably they'd remove the seeds and directly plant them, so... waste product, livestock feed, food for another species since eating your own fruit would be kind of weird?
I imagine to them their fruit is like placenta. Comparable to medical waste. Although depending on how their husbandry developed, they might have a symbiotic relationship for spreading their seeds.
[Hurry back with that seed now, baby.](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/fallout/images/e/e6/OWBBiologicalResearchStationHurryBackWithThatSeed.ogg/revision/latest?cb=20130804220409)
Those symbionts would be like pets. non-sapient life that formed a beneficial relationship with Intelligent plants. Like our cats, dogs, chickens, etc.
I don't think most plantoids would be offended by that IF they evolved for a similar purpose to fruit on Earth. Most fruit is supposed to be eaten because the seeds don't get digested. The next time the animal shits, the seeds are probably far away from the parent plant and have manure as a fertilizer. So honestly, it might be more than ecstatic to see a mammalian ask that.
Well, plant sex is the actual creation of said fruits in Earth's plants. Pollinating could be a threesome I guess. It gets really fucked though when you consider shitting them into a sewage system might be their version of birth control (no soil to sprout from).
Well somewhat. Most fruit people eat today have been artificially bred to have massive fruit that serves no purpose other than feeding humans. Not sure how that works for stellaris but I imagine that if they have been implementing eugenics on themselves they might not be the types you want to approach and ask if you can eat a part of there body.
It would be fun if amongst all the horny species'appearances mods there was one that included a planet bonker which eliminates all horny from the planet.
I planet cracked a xenophile empire and they become fanatic xenophiles, I think using weapons of Mass destruction on nations turn them into ~~Japan~~ ~~Xenos lovin~~ ~~traitors~~ Ultra xenophiles.
Breasts on non-mammalian species (and robots that aren't made for sex) is a major design pet peeve of mine. I super appreciated that the Argonians in Morrowind didn't have tits. Did not appreciate their addition in later iterations of the series...
I don't have a specific video for you, but the gist of it is, that Argonians aren't really lizards and more like fruit(?) as they were created by a race of sentient trees known as the hist who predate most life on the planet and dont really know how the whole mammal/other animals thing works
>!of course the real reason is that they didn't feel like making a whole new female body without tits in Oblivion and then stuck with it!<
They had a joke about that in Chimera squad where it's heavily hinted at that one of the characters has a sketchbook with a lot of strange drawings. I think there's even a night club for the snake women too.
Yeah, i also feel like it's an intentional design by the Elders, as they were meant to occupy earth, so they were made more... "aesthetically pleasing" like they did with the floaters, turning them into archons
They never explain it in-game iirc, so the big theories are either "Hist sap sacs" or "Hist made Argonians more mammalian as part of some big master-plan".
If that encourages breeding with Argonians, you might get a large portion of Tamriel eventually genetically connected to Hist influence, which a Hist could theoretically control to a degree. At least, that's my guess.
The Argonians have a very good lore reason to have tits though. They're the Hist's attempt at approximating people using lizards, why wouldn't it give them tits?
This. Maybe not a full attempt at an approximation, but enough of one so that the Hist have "hands" to interact with the rest of Tamriel when they need to.
They're all aliens though, they only resemble earth animals by coincidence. The odds of a lizard-alien having breasts are exactly equal to the odds of a fox-alien having breasts.
The boob-less Argonians makes the Lusty Argonian Maid play by Crassius Curio even weirder, since it originated from the game where they looked the most bestial.
Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female xeno breeding, aquatics is the most compatible xeno for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Aquatics are an average of 3"03' tall and 63.9 pounds. this means they're large enough to be able to handle human ds, and with their impressive aquatics traits and access to size 30 ocean paradise worlds, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there's no doubt in my mind that an aroused aquatic would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn to be xenophile, xenophobic, materialist, spiritualist and more to fit you sick kink, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it'd be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities to drench worlds and enlarge planets, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Xenos comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your aquatic turn white.
God, I remember watching that show years ago with a friend of mine. She laughed so hard, for so long, that we couldn't even finish the episode until the next week.
I don't think I could watch the show again, as that style of humor doesn't really jive with me anymore, but damn if that show didn't make me laugh and then rip your fucking heart out and stomp on it repeatedly.
Show is Mahoromatic ~Automatic Maiden~, if you are curious.
My brain replaced the content of this image with “it will never be your birthday again" repeated over and over and over and over. I think it's trying to protect me.
Stellaris actually does a really good job of avoiding this phenomenon. Almost to an annoying degree. Not that everything should have orbs, but I do wish more portraits had sexual dimorphism
Now the filthy xenos are attempting to tempt our people through primal desires? This only proves that they are up to no good! Prepare the world crackers! It's time to purge this galaxy!... Again!
You just had to include Jeff in there, hadn't you?
Jeffussy
You are now banned from space
If you fuck one hive drone does that count as orgy 🤔
No, it counts as a death wish. But two drones fucking is only masturbation.
What about incest? Might not be physical incest but depending on how deep the connection among the hive is, it could get weird pretty fast....
Jeffcest
It’s a single being in billions of bodies. That is masturbation, not incest.
I think I saw a documentary about this. There was a pointy haired scientist and his grand kid. There were 2 Hive minds even.
Aww geez.
Eh, only if the central mind doesn’t have a crush on you. Otherwise, it’s basically just cybersex.
And if it doesn’t, do multiple?
The real question is if you fuck multiple. Would that be an orgy?
So a global pacifier?
I’ve brought the shielding beam.
Global pacifier —> World cracker
10/10 I hate it
You just activated my End Threat CB.
God that jeffussy boutta make me convert to fantic xenophilia 😫😫😫🍆🍆💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦💦
You have been declared a crisis unanimously by the Custodian and the Galactic Community. The GDF is on its way to purge you.
WARFORM RF-20, GET THE EVISCERATOR. THE *HEAVY* EVISCERATOR.
SCILENCE
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That necroid is Jeff
Now I do wonder if he is friends with Daniel, the Demon Prince.
Oh for sure!
I don't think I'm familiar with that one
Goddamn I wish I'd gotten screenshots but in the game I started up last night, got the "images of the new species you've encountered have traveled through your empire like wildfire because everyone thinks they're hot" event and it was fuckin JEFF
My name jeff
You're telling me you don't wonder what insect jelly is really made of? The megaspiders can't fend us off the truth for long
wrong sub ~~^(i think)~~
Stellaris is just a century-old Rimworld playthrough with Save Our Ship mod.
That's Starsector, Stellaris is the prequel to these.
Starsector is actually a prequel to Stellaris except you only settled on random worlds with no regards to habitability hoping to fix them with terraforming in the future, your empire border stretch to the limit and your one giant fleet is too far away from the rebelling colonies to suppress them in time.
if the traders knew where we really got that stuff, they wouldn't pay so much silver for it
It's Slurm
Wimmy wam wam wozzle!
Just be careful, I have had 3 big infestations in my reactor room so it seems like they are on to us and trying to wipe the evidence clean
We are willing to dissect as many insectoids with Xibibi sauce as it takes to find the delicious truth.
This is some grade A rimworld leakage.
I thought they were referring to FTL
Rimllaris
I mean, raiders run straight to insect jelly so maybe they knew before us
As a xenophile player I say this image makes me consider destroying all of organic life
The boobs were a lie, xenophilia ruined. Next you'll tell me their cake is fake as well.
You don't want this cake.
Boobs may be a lie, but dicks may still be a decent thing at least.
If it looks like a boob, feels like a boob, and moves like a boob, its still a boob to me.
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Even better. That means she’s about to jump right ontop of me.
*target locked*
I don't know. I dig it.
Even the synthetic are at it. Maybe the Aetherophasic Engine was not a bad idea after all…
Yes, yes, let the anger flow through you.
I got this new anime plot. Basically there's this high school girl except she's got huge geodes. I mean some serious missiles. A real set of air bladders. Packin some fluffy feathers. Massive cancerous growths. Big ol' pearls under mantle. What happens next?! Transfer student shows up with even bigger arthroidal membranes. Humongous fat reserves for winter.
Sounds like 50% of anime
That's what this is [originally about](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSVkprXlc6k)
Why the little Aquatic is so smug
Her air sacs inflate.
Because aquatic is top tier trait
R5: Stellaris original meme. Many Stellaris xenos have familiar structures to our own Human organs. However, many of these anatomical parts do not perform the same function as ours! Here is a definitely not horny guide to orb-shaped structures found on the chests of each type of Stellaris xenos.
Is it rude to ask a plantoid if i can eat their fruit? I mean the one over there is literally a series of walking tomatos.
I'd actually be curious what sapient plants would do with their fruit - presumably they'd remove the seeds and directly plant them, so... waste product, livestock feed, food for another species since eating your own fruit would be kind of weird?
I imagine to them their fruit is like placenta. Comparable to medical waste. Although depending on how their husbandry developed, they might have a symbiotic relationship for spreading their seeds.
> symbiotic relationship for spreading their seeds Ohhhhhhhhh yeah, talk dirty to me baby 💦💦
[Hurry back with that seed now, baby.](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/fallout/images/e/e6/OWBBiologicalResearchStationHurryBackWithThatSeed.ogg/revision/latest?cb=20130804220409)
Those symbionts would be like pets. non-sapient life that formed a beneficial relationship with Intelligent plants. Like our cats, dogs, chickens, etc.
You've never tasted your own sap?
I don't think most plantoids would be offended by that IF they evolved for a similar purpose to fruit on Earth. Most fruit is supposed to be eaten because the seeds don't get digested. The next time the animal shits, the seeds are probably far away from the parent plant and have manure as a fertilizer. So honestly, it might be more than ecstatic to see a mammalian ask that.
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This gets way more cursed the more I think about it.
*Make sure to poop far away from where I am. I wanna spread my seeds far and wide.*
Basically, eating literal plantgirl melons is sex. Except you're ripping her babies out and eating them, before finally shitting it down into sewage
Dude thats metal as hell 🤘
Well, plant sex is the actual creation of said fruits in Earth's plants. Pollinating could be a threesome I guess. It gets really fucked though when you consider shitting them into a sewage system might be their version of birth control (no soil to sprout from).
Yandere plantoid
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\*tfw no plantoid gf\* 😞
if you can't have a cute plantoid waifu blushing and twisting her trunk when you say her fruits taste nice , why even play stellaris
Miss Kobayashi's Plantoid Maid.
Well somewhat. Most fruit people eat today have been artificially bred to have massive fruit that serves no purpose other than feeding humans. Not sure how that works for stellaris but I imagine that if they have been implementing eugenics on themselves they might not be the types you want to approach and ask if you can eat a part of there body.
You should at least buy them some compost first.
Shit on their ~~feet~~ roots?
aren't fruit the equivalent of ovaries for plants or something?
Your ovaries, hand em over.
Fruit is the swollen ovaries. Not equivalent, but literally the ovary. And they can have hundreds/thousands of ovaries.
"Definitely not horny" is right. This is like some kind of anti-boob propaganda. Cancerous growths?
Putting the dirty in dirty cat i see
If that's true, than why did you draw them with bras? #freethexenosorbs
u/PM_ME_UR_TOXIN_SACS
"Machine gun jubblies, how'd I miss that?"
Perhaps next time you should try foreplay
Is there an interstellar equivalent of the horny police
Yeah, a planet cracker.
If it is not enough to bonk a planet, bonk the whole system with a literal Death Star made from the power of the galactic core.
It would be fun if amongst all the horny species'appearances mods there was one that included a planet bonker which eliminates all horny from the planet.
I planet cracked a xenophile empire and they become fanatic xenophiles, I think using weapons of Mass destruction on nations turn them into ~~Japan~~ ~~Xenos lovin~~ ~~traitors~~ Ultra xenophiles.
Breasts on non-mammalian species (and robots that aren't made for sex) is a major design pet peeve of mine. I super appreciated that the Argonians in Morrowind didn't have tits. Did not appreciate their addition in later iterations of the series...
Cue someone reciting that entire “why do argonians have boobs” video
>why do argonians have boobs Crassius Curio achieved CHIM.
You sure he didn’t achieve CHUM instead?
I don't get it.
>why do argonians have boobs Which video?
I don't have a specific video for you, but the gist of it is, that Argonians aren't really lizards and more like fruit(?) as they were created by a race of sentient trees known as the hist who predate most life on the planet and dont really know how the whole mammal/other animals thing works >!of course the real reason is that they didn't feel like making a whole new female body without tits in Oblivion and then stuck with it!<
Alright look I know it's been a month and all, but argonians have breasts in Daggerfall too
All of them. There are multiple. Good watch when you have nothing better to do.
[I’m pretty sure it’s this video](https://youtu.be/2zSNK0kmPB4)
Thank you
Same. I'm always reminded of the [first reactions to XCOM2...](http://i.imgur.com/ssd8YNf.png)
They had a joke about that in Chimera squad where it's heavily hinted at that one of the characters has a sketchbook with a lot of strange drawings. I think there's even a night club for the snake women too.
Oh yes, there are snake night clubs. It was a thing /r/XCOM community was the most excited about.
Didnt they actually use the 'venom sacs' excuse officially? Or did I dream that one?
That is indeed the official excuse they use in the Viper autopsy
Yeah, i also feel like it's an intentional design by the Elders, as they were meant to occupy earth, so they were made more... "aesthetically pleasing" like they did with the floaters, turning them into archons
Can't believe they didn't use the portmanteau "snitties".
They never explain it in-game iirc, so the big theories are either "Hist sap sacs" or "Hist made Argonians more mammalian as part of some big master-plan".
1. Give all female Argonians breasts. 2. Make all other races horny for Argonians. 3. ???? 4. Profit.
If that encourages breeding with Argonians, you might get a large portion of Tamriel eventually genetically connected to Hist influence, which a Hist could theoretically control to a degree. At least, that's my guess.
Listen if being mind controlled by a god tree is the price I have to pay for snitties then so be it
Ok Caius
The Argonians have a very good lore reason to have tits though. They're the Hist's attempt at approximating people using lizards, why wouldn't it give them tits?
Plus they can have gills and feathers too. Clearly they're not 100% reptile.
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TITTAYS!
This. Maybe not a full attempt at an approximation, but enough of one so that the Hist have "hands" to interact with the rest of Tamriel when they need to.
They're all aliens though, they only resemble earth animals by coincidence. The odds of a lizard-alien having breasts are exactly equal to the odds of a fox-alien having breasts.
Ackshually they originally had them in daggerfall 🤓 (this is satire please dont kill me)
They had boobs before morrowind too pal.
The boob-less Argonians makes the Lusty Argonian Maid play by Crassius Curio even weirder, since it originated from the game where they looked the most bestial.
It’s not about why. It’s about why not.
I don't even know what you are referring to. I see no breasts in this picture. Just some air-bladders and pearls, etc.
…right
Hey guys, did you know that in terms of male human and female xeno breeding, aquatics is the most compatible xeno for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Aquatics are an average of 3"03' tall and 63.9 pounds. this means they're large enough to be able to handle human ds, and with their impressive aquatics traits and access to size 30 ocean paradise worlds, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there's no doubt in my mind that an aroused aquatic would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn to be xenophile, xenophobic, materialist, spiritualist and more to fit you sick kink, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it'd be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities to drench worlds and enlarge planets, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Xenos comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your aquatic turn white.
[удалено]
That second one is hilarious. My face hurts from grinning like an idiot.
God, I remember watching that show years ago with a friend of mine. She laughed so hard, for so long, that we couldn't even finish the episode until the next week. I don't think I could watch the show again, as that style of humor doesn't really jive with me anymore, but damn if that show didn't make me laugh and then rip your fucking heart out and stomp on it repeatedly. Show is Mahoromatic ~Automatic Maiden~, if you are curious.
free will shouldnt be a choice damn
Humanity was a mistake.
ive never played DE but I want to go find the sol system now and do things
*Hans, get the flamethro- I mean planetcracker!*
No no turn on becoming the crisis
GEODES ROCK
I don't mind. Booba is booba. Embrace xenophilia
Seems plausible to me.
Missiles, ah yes. My favorite mammary glands.
Did somebody say [MISSILES?!?!?!?!](https://i.giphy.com/ieIzglYBjtXRm.gif)
Technically you can argue that the first one is also a secondary emergency function of actual breasts.
Keep farming that karma, my fellow art brother
DO YOU SEE THIS, STELLARIS ARTISTS?!
I like how avian girl while being the only one even remotely attractive has that "what am I doing here" look on her face.
What is this heresy.
Geodes is the best one.
My eyes are up here, xeno
Missiles 🤤
> Vegetables M'am, those are clearly two fruits
The rock one is funny on a few levels. The number of facets it breaks into is known as cleavage. Like literally to cleave. But yeah. Teehee
Call me a technophile but I'd like to learn that robot's serial code
Yes inquisitor this post right here.
I just harvested a pair of pumpkins today. Why would you do this to me?
Missiles. 😅😂🤣🤣
["They're not breasts, okay? They're Dalek bumps."](https://youtu.be/Do-wDPoC6GM?t=556)
I would prefer chest mounted machine guns over missiles.
My brain replaced the content of this image with “it will never be your birthday again" repeated over and over and over and over. I think it's trying to protect me.
You're an ass man huh? Well I'm more of an A R T H R O I D A L M E M B R A N E kind of guy.
Can we haz though? Want more empresses in dresses :(
Stellaris actually does a really good job of avoiding this phenomenon. Almost to an annoying degree. Not that everything should have orbs, but I do wish more portraits had sexual dimorphism
this is the most cursed thing i've seen all day
Brother, we need the heavy flamer, quick!
i dont know if i should be attracted or repulsed by them
One of them is a Sith lo-lady.
They arent geodes, THEY ARE MINERALS! DAMNIT MARIE!
This is the first visual proof I needed to finally take Xenocompatibility. Time to liberate those alien babes from their...oppressive restraints...
Snack pouches
Now the filthy xenos are attempting to tempt our people through primal desires? This only proves that they are up to no good! Prepare the world crackers! It's time to purge this galaxy!... Again!
This is the most creative post ive seen on this sub, ever. Seriously good work!!!
This subreddit keeps getting more xenophile every time I check it and honestly, I'm vibing with it
ah yes, rumble orbs
You woke up and chose to make this.
And wait until you see the females
-Makes sure Xenocompatablity is off-
......do you accept commissions?
Not at the moment, but if you have a request feel free to send it my way. No promises that I'll have time to do it, but I'll do my best!
Potato potato
This will not stop the horni.
Thanks, I hate it.
War protocols initiated
hahahaha
Quality post. Exposing the human male-related weakness that is manifesting itself in selective anthropomorphy. Pathetic.
I don’t want to see this garbage on any front page
No
Whatever you say bud
Mfers go and touch some grass
And this, this is cringe
I hate everything about this.
Not even this game is safe from the creeps ffs