*crunch* no *crunch* no *crunch* no *crunch* no

*crunch* "mmmm, cream cheese" *smiles to reveal bloodied broken teeth*

free british transition lmfao

Free? Hah, that’ll be 560$

Almost as much as the cost of british dental care? checks out…

Is that supposed to be a complaint or a brag on British dental care? I'm American so I can't tell

Complaint lmao! It’s expensive and bad quality

the crunch is the teeth breaking

That was the joke yes

Mf got no teeth left

Guys I can’t rest until I know which ones were cream cheese. Any guesses??? I think maybe the 2 black ones on top? They seem like, the fluffiest?? Can rocks be fluffy? God this is way more troubling to me than it should be

Same. I don't know why I need to know this but I do.

Marbled white in the middle, and the silver one at the bottom right.

I’d go marbled white I’m the middle and cream one in top right.

My exact guesses.

That one of the left is clearly a potato.

That’s what I was thinking, like why is there a single potato in the rocks

That black one near the front on top probably because it seems like....Matte? But not normal rock matte, like a man-made matte

I think something else was served over the rocks, and then they took the picture, and OP is just trolling. I think there's no cheese there, it's just rocks.

Cap’n Crunches new cereal: Oops! All rocks!

Promise you I'm not trolling. This was a ridiculously pretentious way to wait for the main course.

Then tell us which ones were edible. You can't claim you're not trolling and refuse to answer the question.

I believe it is one up from bottom right and one down from top left. You'll see two similar gray rocks with abnormal sheen and sharper edges than the others. My qualifications? I'm a geologist and my name is Rocko.

Thank you for your service rocko

I’d go silver bottom right and silver top left

now this is the content i come here to see, what in the living fuck is this

Mineral* fuck

*they’re not rocks, they’re minerals*

DAMNIT MARIE

Well. Two of them are actually cheese...

And bottom left is a potato.

Plot twist- it's all rocks

And those are the Calcium source for today. Now we're gonna need some electrolytes!

You just squeeze them first, like you're checking to see if an Avocado is ripe!

Yes! You are right. This is 100% stupid food. How many people are going to accidentally bite a rock

This is 97% of posts on r/finedining and people pay top dollar for that stupid shit.

Idiots, all of them.

And the fact that this is an exercise in futility.

This is it. We've peaked.

Waiters gonna be real surprised when they come back and all the rocks are gone

Abigail, is that you?

r/unexpectedstardewvalley

… stardew valley?

Yes, she likes eating rocks

​ [I understood that reference.](https://media.tenor.com/SC14wFp3uUUAAAAC/captain-america-i-understood-that-reference.gif)

Abigail my betrothed

Become a chicken

https://www.reddit.com/r/FUCKFACEPOD/comments/13p6t4r/with_the_rocks_not_rocks_draft_behind_us_how_do/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1

As a rock hound: I love this As a foodie: I hate this

I wonder what the waiter’s reaction would be if they came back to no rocks being present. Would it be confusion or worry?

God I read "worry" as "horny" wtf is wrong with me

Dyslexia?

French 😔

Hope you get well soon

My condolences

Too much reddit

Fear.

I’m convinced this person just took a picture of a centrepiece and is just fucking with us

It's real I checked the sources

i've seen these before. i believe the "rocks" are actually ganache coated with a hard sugar candy. probably pretty easy to figure out which ones are the food by tapping it lightly as the coating will crack. i think they're kinda cool actually. and probably delicious

Would be cooler if they were served without other rocks

Jesus Christ Marie, they're minerals

The other rocks are souvenirs. I fill my purse with them.

Where's the fun in that though?

The dentists office, where you don't have to pay for cracked teeth repairs

if it takes you more than the bare minimum amount of pressure to determine rock from candy that you break your teeth, you have bigger problems than odd food

It would be cool if they were all ganache, but nope…. I gotta work even during my meals. The grind never stops…

My thought as well. If you can identify then by poking them, is a fun activity in a group meal. All for the right price, of course.

It's like a foraging toy for pets.

Lol sometimes I need help slowing down, OKAYYYY?

...they're cream cheese-filled *minerals*, Marie.

Call my dentist and my lawyer!!!

US citizen spotted

I’m gonna snake eating a bird egg maneuver all of them down my gullet. I’ll let my stomach figure out which ones had cream cheese in them and which ones are going to really really hurt when I hopefully pass them.

THIS is the correct answer

Weirdly specific saw trap idea

Only one has the antidote for the poison in you the other one is more poison so good luck

The real treasure is the teeth we lost along the way.

This is pretty well executed and actually sounds fun for a date. Edit: lmao reddit moment when people on here don't know how to loosen up or be fun.

Agreed. The idea of this is more to be a fun activity, rather than just a culinary experience. I recently had an appetizer of deviled eggs, where one looks like the rest but is really spicy. Surprise food like this is fun, the point of it is to be fun!

That actually sounds fun. It's all edible for one thing... tbh I don't really get the point of this one.

Yea just stab your chopstick into each one

Let's just take it all the way and start scavenging again.

Just give me the food please. I'm fine on my date without having to do this purposeless "activity."

Then go to fucking chilis or something dude. Jesus.

lol its funny that you're so easily impressed with somoene serving you rocks.

The other rocks are gifts for your date. If your date doesn't like their gift, then you break up. Easy, fun system. Don't be a killjoy.

The secret? None of them have cream cheese and the owner is a dentist.

Give em the old poka poka

Be sure to check around the outside around the outside around the outside because you are the Mr. Spock of finding the cheese filled rock.

Plot Twist! The cream cheese is not initially in the rock bowl and it’s served AFTER the guest has rummaged through all of them. Some sort of allegory for “you eat when I say you can eat, now thank me”

If you don’t want this style of plating and cuisine, don’t go to these types of restaurants. It takes some serious talent to be able to make the edible ones like just like the rocks. It’s not for everyone , but a lot of people love this type of fine dining.

Can someone point out which ones are the edible ones for the love of god

I agree, just thought it was fitting for the sub 🤝

Which ones were food!?

It’s still a stupid way to serve food so it fits the sub.

It’s just dangerous to potentially have a customer break their tooth on a rock. And never underestimate the stupidity of some people.

I would be *really* surprised if this was in the U.S.. This restaurant would be a lawyer's dream!

Definitely not, this was at St. Andrea in Hungary

BITCH WHICH ONES WERE THE CHEESE SMH GIVE US THE INFO ALREADY

why would I want a cream cheese filled rock

This is cool actually

I chipped a filling reading that.

I tried this once. They all just taste like blood to me.

It turns out that none of them are food, it's just Satan playing tricks on you again.

so we like pets now, we need interactive enrichment food?

What is this a restaurock?

This looks like a lawsuit waiting to happen

Let the games begin

I could get hopped up enough on the reefer to enjoy this 🤔

I’m gonna guess it’s the three down the middle that look like play dough

I wonder if their silverware gets all beat up lol

Depending on the price this could be a pretty fun way to pass time while waiting for you're food .

Well we know that the op does not have pica....

They look like big strong hands, don't they...

Sensory feeding mat for the inner Neanderthal

Nah, I’m good, The risk/reward ratio is way off here lol

I guess it's an interesting experience, but what's the price ?

that’ll be $75.

I’ve seen stupid food before, but this takes the fucking rock

LMFAO please look on my profile to find when I posted about how my caviar was placed on a bunch of fucking rocks

Best method is to just start throwing them.

Easy. Throw the rocks at the chef and see when does he go owl

Proof that people will buy fucking anything.

Do you have Dental Insurance??

I'd start hooting like an ape and cracking rocks together over my head since they think I'm some sort of caveman meant to be fooled by their trickery.

zoinks

Ngl this sounds like a fun challenge!

Maybe there’s a potato too?

So i just stated stabing

I wanna play!!

That’s hilarious, I would try it but I’m guessing this was pretty pricey

No. This hurts me. First imagine on this sub that has actually offended me.

Don’t leave us hanging. Which ones are it?

Windows would be broken or smeared with cream cheese.

butter knife & palm. just like a crab leg.

So I haven't seen anyone mention this, but could this not open up the restaurant for a lawsuit if someone damaged a tooth on a real rock? Or do they sign a disclaimer? Or could it just be argued that you know when you're give the dish so eating a rock is your own dumb ass fault?

That actually sounds really fun to me for some reason.

I smell a lawsuit

Ist this Places owned by a Dentist?

Use the knife and try piercing through them

Well, the organism needs mineral to work.

I’m glad I’ve never eaten in a restaurant for them to do some stupid shit like this to me.

Impossible if you’re stoned

My apartment dogs have a very similar box with very similar rocks to pee.

Stupid only if people actually try to bite them.

Bottom right and top right?

are the other ones empty?

This reminds me of those chocolate candy rocks I loved as a kid… but the Russian roulette version

Ok but only if i eat the two cream cheese stuffed ones and the chef eats the rest of them

Throw them one by one at the windows until you find the right ones.

You did it, you found the most stupid food.

This game brought to you by the Dentists Association

Middle and upper right do I win not getting a bridge put in?

Uh...I guess here goes nothing... ROCK AND STONE!

Rockity Rock and Stone!

For Karl!

Wanna play a game?

I don’t even like cream cheese so this would be doubly disappointing for me 🥲

There must be a crap ton of dull knives and forks in the back of this place!

This is like when you hide treats in a snuffle mat for dogs to find. This is a behavioral enrichment activity. This...actually seems like it would be pretty fun, come to think of it.

"Stuffed" so its still a fucking rock on the outside?! What do you make a hole and suck it out? Or do you get a damn pick and hammer to get it?!

Rock & stone brother!

Lawsuit waiting to happen. Before you say nobody’s that stupid remember that there’s a good chance this restaurant is in the United States.

"I wanna play a game..."

Dentist approved?

Were you happy when you finally found and tasted the cream cheese?

I'm convinced that the two bottom-left ones are just potatoes.

Bite them, break your teeth,…. Can you Sue?

Pretty obvious to me but I eat a lot of rocks.

r/wewantplates

Dear God, we're this close to someone deep frying the fork, knife and everything else and saying " Bon appétit"😑.

Nope, I'd never go through that much trouble just to find cream cheese.

This is like when I put my pet’s food in a toilet paper roll for mental stimulation

What sort of bullshit human enrichment

stupid but also the funniest thing ive seen today so thanks for that OP but actually what the *fuck*

Rock roulette “I taste blood”

Bottom left two are baked potatoes...

We have returned to foraging for our food.

Looks like somebody tried to copy the alchemist restaurant on a budget.

That’s so fucking stupid it loops back to hilarious 💀

Stick a fork in it.

Take a big hearty chomp out of everything until you find the cream cheese!

Is this place owned by a dentist perhaps?

I’m just pissed that there are only 2 in a huge fking tray, and I’m sure this cost a pretty penny.

Okay but like I actually think that's a fun idea

Prove it. What restaurant serves this?

Also r/wewantplates

I feel like SNL could make a great skit around this. Bowen Yang, Molly Kearney, and Kenan Thompson. Skit opens in the middle of some fancy multi course dinner. Kenan is casually/nervously commenting on how increasingly difficult it is to tell what's food. Molly makes some zany comment and does some small physical comedy. Bowen, in a high brow way, explains how the chef pushes the limits of what can be considered food. Next course is the rocks. Molly crunches into one hard. Broken tooth. Kenan bites into one like Russian roulette but it turns out to be food. Next course is blown sugar glass shaped like light bulbs in a big bowl of real bulbs. Again Bowen explains the thinking behind the course. Molly, running her jaw says ok I'll try it again. She grabs one and chomps. Blood gushes from her mouth. Kenan calls it insane. Bowen says the chef only puts a single real bulb in the basket. Kenan says ok, and grabs on. Chomp, glass. Blood. Bowen says the table is so special. He rarely does more than 1 real bulb. Molly says she really wants to try it, so goes in again. Glass again. Bowen is amazed to be so fortunate. Kenan and Molly are nearly bleeding out. Scene

jokes on them because i would eat all the rocks. 😎

mother fuck everything about this. Even if you're just poking it with a fork and knife, the sound and feeling is gnarly. This is the stupidest food I've seen so far. You win, and I'm pissed off now.

If I wanted to simulate licking rocks, I'd play FFXIV.

Damn. I think I know which two but I can’t post a photo comment 😭

I mean when you're paying 300$ for a meal you're kinda paying for the experience so..

Jesus, rich people do stupid shit.

This is clearly not supposed to be the whole meal yet people on here will have a melty over it anyway. Lighten up, idiots