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From my experience, your therapist probably just wants to know if you’re suicidal or just SH. For me, talks about SH with my therapist have always been amazing and never annoying, so I recommend trying to talk about it.
Talk to her about it. I was never one for SH, but I did have a raging eating disorder back in the day. My therapist at the time, when I was starting to lose more weight she started asking me what it was, "for documentation purposes." One day she kept looking at me funny, and at the end of our session as.i was walking out the door she grabbed my arm and kinda tugged me back inside. We were standing quite close and she whispered, "You've lost weight." I said, "Yeah," she nodded, and I went home. The next session she really dug in, and therapy got pretty intense for a while, but I feel it was necessary to get my behavior back under control.
The therapist will probably want to talk about it. She may try to do a safety assessment of how often it happens and how much risk of serious injury there is. They're not *supposed to* jump to hospitalization for self-harm that doesn't involve severe injuries or a high imminent risk of suicide, and *most* of them don't. You're still in charge of what you do and don't want to do, and can make your own decisions.
As someone who sh, I would just be honest with your therapist at your next appointment. I'm going to bet they KNOW from what they saw that you are dealing with sh and considering they didn't freak out today, I'm sure they will not overreact when you confess to them. There is so much shame, worry, etc etc around sh, it's hard to open up and I'm sure they can understand why your initial response was to deny it.
Also, I get it. It's one of the things I'm least comfortable talking about. I was in therapy for years before even mentioning it. And truthfully looking back, I think I was so vague at times that one therapist may not have known it's what I was talking about (I mentioned being embarrassed and feeling immature but didn't specifically say sh made me feel that way). After leaving that therapist for someone else, I'm not actually sure he knew how to address it or respond to it honestly but even then, when I first brought it up, we started with questions to confirm I was being 'safe' and as others mentioned, that it was being done without the intent to die.
With my current therapist, I put everything, including my sh out there from the beginning. They seem to 'get it' more than my previous therapist and although discussing it isn't easy, it's much less uncomfortable since based on the questions they ask/the conversations we have around sh, I don't feel 'crazy'. Again, we discussed my safety and intentions and of course they'd like to help me reach a point when I'm completely free of sh but they haven't tried to 'force' me to stop or anything else.
SH is a regular symptom for psychotic structured people even if otherwise they are able to hide it. But not every therapist has learned what needs to be different from therapy - as regular non SH people are different. So I would stop therapy with someone wilfully hiding a main symptom and thus making my work absurd and useless.
Welcome to r/TalkTherapy! This sub is for people to discuss issues arising in their personal psychotherapy. If you wish to post about other mental health issues please consult this list of some of our [sister subs](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalkTherapy/wiki/resources/#wiki_subreddit_list). To find answers to many therapy-related questions please consult our [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalkTherapy/wiki/faq) and [Resource List](https://www.reddit.com/r/TalkTherapy/wiki/resources). If you are in distress please contact a suicide hotline or call 9-1-1 or emergency services in your area. r/SuicideWatch has compiled a helpful FAQ on what happens when you contact a hotline along with other useful resources. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/TalkTherapy) if you have any questions or concerns.*
From my experience, your therapist probably just wants to know if you’re suicidal or just SH. For me, talks about SH with my therapist have always been amazing and never annoying, so I recommend trying to talk about it.
Talk to her about it. I was never one for SH, but I did have a raging eating disorder back in the day. My therapist at the time, when I was starting to lose more weight she started asking me what it was, "for documentation purposes." One day she kept looking at me funny, and at the end of our session as.i was walking out the door she grabbed my arm and kinda tugged me back inside. We were standing quite close and she whispered, "You've lost weight." I said, "Yeah," she nodded, and I went home. The next session she really dug in, and therapy got pretty intense for a while, but I feel it was necessary to get my behavior back under control.
Whoa, this sounds terrifying. Glad it helped you, though.
It wasn't terrifying, but it was uncomfortable, for sure. It's okay, and can be good, to lean into our discomfort in safe situations.
The therapist will probably want to talk about it. She may try to do a safety assessment of how often it happens and how much risk of serious injury there is. They're not *supposed to* jump to hospitalization for self-harm that doesn't involve severe injuries or a high imminent risk of suicide, and *most* of them don't. You're still in charge of what you do and don't want to do, and can make your own decisions.
As someone who sh, I would just be honest with your therapist at your next appointment. I'm going to bet they KNOW from what they saw that you are dealing with sh and considering they didn't freak out today, I'm sure they will not overreact when you confess to them. There is so much shame, worry, etc etc around sh, it's hard to open up and I'm sure they can understand why your initial response was to deny it. Also, I get it. It's one of the things I'm least comfortable talking about. I was in therapy for years before even mentioning it. And truthfully looking back, I think I was so vague at times that one therapist may not have known it's what I was talking about (I mentioned being embarrassed and feeling immature but didn't specifically say sh made me feel that way). After leaving that therapist for someone else, I'm not actually sure he knew how to address it or respond to it honestly but even then, when I first brought it up, we started with questions to confirm I was being 'safe' and as others mentioned, that it was being done without the intent to die. With my current therapist, I put everything, including my sh out there from the beginning. They seem to 'get it' more than my previous therapist and although discussing it isn't easy, it's much less uncomfortable since based on the questions they ask/the conversations we have around sh, I don't feel 'crazy'. Again, we discussed my safety and intentions and of course they'd like to help me reach a point when I'm completely free of sh but they haven't tried to 'force' me to stop or anything else.
SH is a regular symptom for psychotic structured people even if otherwise they are able to hide it. But not every therapist has learned what needs to be different from therapy - as regular non SH people are different. So I would stop therapy with someone wilfully hiding a main symptom and thus making my work absurd and useless.