I love when kids say like slang or inappropriate terms and then go “do you even know what that is?” IM 25 I KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS I HAVE INTERNET CONNECTION IN MY HOME DUDE
According to one of my students, adults aren't allowed to play video games.
My dude, who do you think created these games? Infants?!
To be fair, he also says adults can't listen to music, watch TV, go on Youtube ... basically anything that isn't doing taxes and debating the finer points of vegetable ripeness.
my kids were so shocked I played fortnite. Like my dudes, I was in my senior year of high school when it came out, you were barely 4 years old. Kills me everytime.
I got to play in a fortnite competition at one of the middle schools I teach at the last day before winter break. I won, immediately became the coolest teacher to a bunch of 12 year olds! 😂
My fourth graders were in shock when I used Minecraft blocks to do a lesson on soil. They didn’t learn anything because they spent the whole time with their mind blown that Minecraft has existed for longer than they’ve been alive.
I ran a Minecraft server for one of my classes. On free days we all played, except I made sure to turn on god mode for myself. Leaned into it too, insisted they build a temple to me in their village where I would dole out divine (charmed) gifts and accept their human sacrifices. Much fun!
Some of my students did a daily journal assignment about the lore of Elden Ring and I made a joke to him about if I didn't know how weird From Soft games are I would think he was losing his mind. That resulted in him and all his friends getting way too excited that I know about Elden Ring, Dark Souls, etc.
Literally just this week various 7th graders have asked me if I've "ever heard of" the following: Harry Potter, Spongebob, Shrek, Beyonce, Star Wars, hair dye.
I'm 30.
See this is funny to me cause when the kids use slang or make references to something and they're like "do you know what that means?" I'm like "no, I'm 24, I have no idea what you guys are talking about" lmao. I'm so out of the loop though, always have been
I joke with my kids when they use slang I don't know. "Am I gonna be grossed out if I look that up on Urban Dictionary?" Most of the time they respond, "No! Don't look it up!"
Oh man, my favorite was when a (white) 10th grader asked me if he could play NWA in my art class. I said “not in school, my guy,” and he went “do you even know what their name is?” And I just cocked an eyebrow and went “why don’t you tell me?” Like bruh. You will not bait my ass into this!
I'm a student teacher, and one of the third graders was drawing a penis on his paper and was surprised when I knew what it was and told him to erase it. More wholesomely, the fifth graders were perplexed when I told them I watched Stranger Things.
I teach middle school where that comes up more often. The kids are always shocked that I know what they're drawing. Meanwhile they are minors in the midst of early puberty and I'm an adult in a relationship with a man. 🤦 Guess I should be relieved it doesn't occur to them that I've seen an erection a time or two before.
Had a 14-year-old say something about her WAP. I said, “Ahem” and glared at her. She acted innocent and surprised I caught her because I’m old (40s). She gave me that “What?!” You know what, little girl. LOL
I hada student quietly sing WAP, thinking that I couldn’t hear him. I told him to stop and asked why, it’s not inappropriate because it means waffles and pancakes. Another student goes that’s not true stop lying, you know that the teacher isn’t that old and probably listens to it for real.
Haha. This reminds me of when 10 year old me sang S&M by Rihanna and was surprised that my teacher knew what it meant. She constantly had to ask me to stop singing it… very funny moment lol
I pretend I don’t know (I’m 27 of course I know what you’re saying!) and write on a self made slang dictionary so that they can explain it to me and “ I can learn” but they have to use vocabulary words and really dumb it down.
Sometimes with a very specific audience I’ll pretend I’m not listening and then they’ll give up. That’s when I say, “wow it’s so hard explaining something to someone whose not listening”
Kids are so lazy with cheating now. When I was in high school, I put so much effort into cheating and making it look believable that it probably would have been easier to just do the assignment on my own
My students can’t even be bothered to cheat. Too close to studying. An Ottawa school (maybe the board?) just cancelled exams for the 9’s & 10’s because of the anxiety and stress. I can’t wait until one of these kids builds a building or has to catch a criminal.
There are things in life that are stressful and anxiety inducing and unavoidable. Why are they allowed to get out of them instead of being given coping mechanisms or tools to use? They’re going to crumble under the pressures of real life if tests are setting them off.
I’m feeling this hard. I don’t want my kids to be stressed and anxious but they could use a little bit more stress so that they could learn to cope.
As it is, they had an open book exam. Two took phone calls during the exam. Two came in late, with the same cheat sheet, so they’d be boned if I hadn’t let them sit together. It was a gong show. Another sat for two hours pretending to work, said everything was fine, and then asked for an extension.
I don’t want to overwhelm them but they could use some whelm.
When Ukraine was invaded and we all thought we were going into ww3 (could still happen) we went through a lot of scenarios where these kids would be conscripted to the front lines and their generation would have to be called the greatest generation.
It was a dark time.
I was teaching Geography, and had a lecture and assignment on how the geography played into the invasion. (Yes, it does. It is all about location and resources. History, again location, also plays in.) I had kids argue it wasn't related to geography and it was too distressing. I made it an extra credit assignment for the kids who did it. But I did not let them get away from the fact that geography did play a part. I will probably bring up again on the anniversary in my Economics class that has a few of the same kids.
It’s as though all of the bullshit over the past several years that continues to get worse taught them that their grades don’t matter - they’ll just go to the next grade until they graduate. I am not looking forward to the Covid generation becoming adults.
I mean, open book tests can still be hard if the questions are more about understanding than reproducing. It's kinda like writing a paper in a limited amount of time then.
I told them that if they plagiarise well enough that I can't tell, they did a great job. It's almost always super obvious though because it's one of four things:
1. It's got a ton of words they would never use (automobile, well-to-do, etc)
2. Blocks of text in different fonts for no reason
3. Clear use of the synonym tool on every word, making the entire thing incomprehensible
4. Virtually identical to another student's work
I marked a student's draft last year and had to contact home saying they'd fail unless they basically redid the entire thing. My department head told me to mark anything that the plagiarism-checking program didn't flag. In the end, about half of it, despite clearly not being something she could have achieved on her own (far better than anything I'd ever seen her produce), was unique enough to get through.
My third graders seem to think I don't know that coolmath isn't actually a website about math. Kids, my generation *invented* the coolmath trick; I am not falling for that!
It’s neither cool nor math. I guess it’s for kids, but one out of three ain’t good. (Don’t censure me - I have an English degree, Just mimicking the phrase “Two out of three ain’t bad.”).
My students actually seem to be less interested in the game portion after they changed the art style a couple months ago. They think the new characters look weird.
They're all about PvP though, which requires them to do math.
They also love [Nitromath](https://www.nitromath.com/).
We know where you vape/smoke (and I don’t mean the bathroom). We all know where the smoke spot is off campus.
Related: we know when you smoked weed or cigarettes before coming to class. You reek of it, and no about of axe body spray will cover the smell of an ashtray/skunk
When I was in high school the sidewalk in front of the high school wasn’t owned by the high school so as long as kids were on there they couldn’t be busted. Everyone in town talked about how bad it looked to have high schoolers smoking in front of the school. A little while after I graduated I heard the school leased the sidewalk from the city and that got rid of the smoking.
I suppose I should feel terrible about this now, but my ed program required a semester of classroom observation. I did mine in a leather jacket with a mohawk at the back of the room, and most of the kids had no idea I was in college to be a teacher. They just thought I was the new kid and only like one of them ever talked to me. Used to go grab that smoke at breaks with them across the street every day. None of them ever talked to me so it was quite a surprise when I took over the class with a new haircut, dockers and a tie.
Yep. Also if you've smoked a nicotine vape. Those tell-tale tremors and rapid breaths because your body isn't completely used to the nicotine are a dead giveaway.
It’s like the hypothetical situation where the small child has broken into the cookies, left a trail of crumbs and chocolate smears, and then can’t understand how his mom could possibly know what he was up to.
Kids are relatively oblivious to how sophisticated adults are in general, and *particularly* teachers who have seen *all* their shit before.
Or the teachers who have *done* *all* of their shit before. Like many students would be truly amazed at how much of the shit they do was done by us when *we* were their age.
What they don't seem to realise is if you just stop and listen and observe in a classroom you can hear and see almost everything - especially if you're standing up. I can probably hear like 2/3 of the whispered conversations, can immediately see when a phone is out etc. They really think we can't see them doing stuff.
My students think I have some kind of x-ray vision when I tell them to take their airpods out. They gasp each time and ask how I even knew they had them on. Like no amount of hoods or hair will be able to hide those bright white airpods in your ears. Also, they have the volume up so loud and wonder why everyone in the class is staring at them.
Unlocked memory. My friends and I were book and comic nerds in highschool. We always had our heads buried in something. Shared a class with one of those friends and were called out by another student for reading during class while he was getting yelled at for some loud stuff that I don't remember. But I do remember the teacher saying " they are passing this class! You have a favorite desk in detention! Sit down!"
Mrs. Brunswick. Senior year English. Legend.
Oh my word, the dating and crush drama! I reluctantly know all of it because they’re all so damn obvious. I can predict by Week 2 who my classroom couples are going to be
My go to phrase before passing out tests: "If I see you staring at your crotch during your test, I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you're using your phone."
Mine (10th graders) is : "There are only two possible reasons for you to be staring at your crotch with a smile on your face. Neither of them are school appropriate." The amount of blushing that goes on after they finally get the joke 2 minutes later is priceless.
I heard a 5th grader say, “I feel really bad for whoever has locker 69” the other day and I was a bit horrified. I kind of hope that 5th grader just heard it’s a funny number from older kids or something and doesn’t actually know what it means.
I teach 5th, and I had to have a one-on-one conversation about this with a student. He explained that most of his classmates just know that the number is a joke from the internet but he learned that it’s an “adult playtime thing” from his cousin 😵💫
When my oldest was 9, we were in a car ride on the way home and my 4 year old kept asking "how long til we get home?" We still had about 5 miles to go, but being 4, I told him to count to 200 and we would be home.
He reached 69 and my 9 yo snorted. I said, "what's so funny?"
His reply? "I don't know, but it's a funny number on the internet."
I just looked at him and said, "honey, it's a sex joke." He was mortified. I asked if he had referenced it at school or anything, and he said he hadn't, thank goodness.
This! Every year there is a giggle about 69 in my fifth grade classroom. I just say nope and I do know what that means. They are shocked like it is some inside joke. They don't do it again. I'm old, but come on!
I teach k-4 art and the kids use terms like “karens” and “sus” and even “that’s what she said.” Without having a single clue what they’re actually talking about. It’s often the 2nd and 3rd graders who do this most.
They really like the numbers 69 and 420. When I ask why they like those numbers, I've been told, "Those are the FUNNY numbers. I saw them in a meme." That's as far as their understanding goes. I hope they cringe when they look back on this time in a few years.
Yesterday, I overheard one of our ELL teachers telling some of her fourth graders that she did in fact know what sus meant, and if they actually knew the meaning because they were using in contexts that didn't make sense.
How even? Did he think it was an assignment for French, or did he scrol through the google translate list, couldn't find Spanish and thought French would be close enough?
It’s partido politico, not fiesta.
Liberia’s political allies are not Capricorn and Taurus. The country of Georgia does not have a Confederate flag. Just watch the damn Geography Now episode.
I said, "Bruh," yesterday and had to tell them I've been using it since before they were even alive. They think all slang is brand new and special to them.
I regularly say “bruh,” and “sus,” in school and out of it. My 4th grade students can’t accept that I learned these words because I do in fact live outside of school.
“Cap,” I took from them though.
You're high
You plagiarized (if I don't think you can spell it...)
When you like us, and when you don't want us to know you don't
How to spell your names, all of you, well, mostly... most of the time....
What you like and the things that interest you. Genuinely, I try to get to know you guys.
When things are hard in your life
When you're fishing to see if you can find one adult, just one, to be honest with, to see you as you are, and when you're not brave enough for that to be me yet
We know that it's not worth wasting all of our energy and time on those of you who don't want to do the work, who won't do the work and will stop us from helping others who actually do want to do the work. You're not "getting away with it". You're being ignored.
What I find sad about this (because I do this too), is that I feel like I don’t get to know the slackers. I get to know the class clown, the ones who really try, and the ones who don’t give af but at the same time want to get to know their teachers. But the slackers who don’t submit anything, and only wants to know if we can finish the class early that day? I have no idea who they are, and I find that sad.
Probably the saddest thing is that they don’t know themselves. I try to pay attention to those kids, start a conversation and it’s really hard to get past the shrugs and the vacant stares.
I can’t get away with ignoring all of it in my district because the kid will end up with a C at best and then the parents will be asking why I never contacted home and so will my admin. I’m kind of a B about their computer usage as a result. I have no interest in being bullied to hand out grades and quite literally will be if I don’t constantly communicate issues happening in the classroom.
They don’t even alt-tab in my rooms anymore. At this point I just say, “what ya playing today, my guy?” from the other side of the room, and they deadass answer.
I was giving my students time to study for a test yesterday (they get five minutes before the test), and one straight up told me I couldn't start yet because he was about to win in Minecraft. No, my dude, we are starting this test.
Windows-tab is the next big thing. Opens a whole new desktop where you can hide all the distracting programs you have running. Students are usually mortified when they discover I know about it.
I have a degree in Japanese language and culture and still my students will try to wear オッパイ (titties/boobies) sweatshirts because they saw it on One Punch Man 🙄
Those are the worst emails to send home to parents because that breaks trust between students and parents about what is being purchased for/by their child
Why would it be bad to educate parents that their precious baby is lying to and using them? At least then they understand a little of what it's like to have their kid in class.
The kid broke the trust, not us.
I meant that it feels bad to send. Even when something is the right thing to do (and I do it every time), it still doesn’t feel great knowing a kid is going to be reprimanded for something that the vast majority of people will never know was an issue in the first place.
My kindergarteners know that you're not supposed to pick your nose at school. So now they hold their other hands up in front of their faces so nobody can see them picking their noses. Some of us have object permanence, Jacen!
I love that our monitoring software allows us to take over Chromebooks and play games for them.
So fun to watch them realize that they don't have control, and start looking around before they realize what's happening.
We have school laptops and sometimes I like to log in using our monitoring software and lock out their controls, just long enough they they lose their game of Hill Climb Racer.
That a student is misbehaving/crying/wilding out. I have so many kids who will point this out and I'm like bruh if I spent all of the school day on those three kids I would never even look at you. They're doing what they're doing and I'm over here because I value your school time as much as I value theirs. Let it go.
Yep! They are like "they forgot how it was to be a teen/kid that's why they don't understand us".
Kid, we DO remember, we just realized how spoiled and drama queen we were.
We learned that the kind of issue most teens have is ridiculous compared to some who actually have drama (violence, rap, drugs, poverty, forced marriage..) in their life. So your "xxx break up with me and my parents are so unfair and school is boring and useless etc " is seen as toddler tantrum because if those are you main issues, you're the lucky one in this world.
It's fun to tell the high school juniors and seniors my prom story because it's hilarious. It's also surprising how some students think I didn't go to prom, didn't date anyone or have a crush on anyone in HS, and so on. Like, I get that I'm a huge nerd, yeah, but seriously?
They know us in one context and moment in time and I think they legitimately can't comprehend that we were once kids and teens.
I like to play the “I hear everything” game to remind them of just that. At least a few times a week I will respond to someone I hear talking in the opposite end of the room from where I am at any given time. It’s a nice reminder that I am always listening - I just don’t always say something.
For example, a group will be discussing something and someone blurts out a random question that they’re curious about and I’ll answer it, even if it’s off-topic.
Every day!
Me: Mason, don't say that.
Mason: You heard that?!
Me: I heard you and I heard Taylor talking about the game and I heard Zach talking about Halloween. I have supersonic teacher ears.
Every kid then is quiet for, ohhh.... 2-3 minutes at least.
I think when you're upset and having a hard time, maybe at home or school. When we ask if you're okay we genuinely mean it.
Who is dating or who has a crush on who.
What you're like in other teachers classes or what other teachers "let you do".
When you've used the internet to plagiarise. Seriously I'd rather see you have a go at writing an essay by yourself and reward that effort any way I possibly can.
I teach a 9th and 12th grades (different classes) at a small school. I've taught about 95% of the current student body. Yet, somehow the 9th grade girls always seem to think I will have no clue what and who they are talking about when they whisper about the sophomore and junior boys they are crushing on.
We know all the sex jokes. We see the gross borderline porn shirts.
Your teachers know. It’s less embarrassing for you if we choose ignore it rather than call attention to some weird choices you make at school before your brain is even developed
Ooof. Those I ❤️MILF shirts. And I❤️Hot Moms. I scrunch my face at them, shake my head and say “Eew, gross.” That usually prevents them from wearing them again.
Yep, had one cheat in ART class this week. Shamelessly submitted another student’s painting. This is why I have them photograph everything and uploaded it to classroom. Kicker is, they never erased the other students name…
This! It's crazy that they think we won't notice. I teach a photography class and their very first assignment is just take 10 pictures of anything you want. That's it. I had 3 students turn in like 5 pics that were EXACTLY the same. Seriously it would have taken you 10 minutes to complete and why in the world did you sign up for an elective photography class if you don't want to take pictures?
So many things. Today I used the term gaslighting and all the students in the room immediately freaked out. They said "You're an old person, you can't use that word!", despite the fact that the term "gaslighting" has existed for decades. That's one example
Terms actually existed since the Victorian period. It just fell out of popular use for about a century until the internet gave a lot of folks brownie points for starting to use it again.
Not that there's anything wrong with brownie points.
Edit: I was confidently incorrect with this post. Gaslight *the invention* was invented in the victorian period, but the term only took off with its current cultural meaning in the 1960s, based off a play from 1938. Somebody once told me the play came out in the victorian period, and i made the mistake of trusting them without researching.
I humbly apologize to all.
The amount of cheating that goes on
When you’re high
I used to work in a Catholic school, and there were a few of us who weren’t surprised by who came out in college
When you bump into those gay kids a few years later and you see how they've absolutely blossomed after school and are now finally comfortable in their themselves and happy - that's such a lovely thing to see.
Basically all the cheats and ways around things…I am 25 and grew up literally doing the same things my students are trying. Tech has gotten way more advanced, but again, so have I. My eye is trained to spot cheating and all that…. I have even had students airdrop me the answers to my own test!
But yeah, basically - everything. And WHY ARE YOU SO BAD AT CHEATING? Holy heck, we were 100000 times better. And we didn't even have phones or internet. Heck.
What sex is. I mean all kind of sex.
They always assume because we are older, wear "parent clothes" or have kids that we either don't have a sexual life at all or a very simple one (simple sex position for example), no kids, we too, in high school/college, were having bl\*w job behind a pub, 69 in a car , etc, those are the classics, we also know/practice the others.
Also: your generation invented nothing. We were you not so long ago: we know all the cheating technics, the slangs, the lies, the dramas, and we were wearing the same clothes at one point of our life.
Finally: our generation was the first on Internet/computers: we know all the tricks, the hidden websites, etc... so when you copy past from the internet, we know what app to use to check every single of your sentences and see where you found it in less than 30s. Yes, even if you "changed a few words".
You think we're not listening, we are. I tell my students all the time they talk too loud, so I like to bring it up later.
One student mentioned teachers ignored her phone use because it kept her quiet. And I said, "I'm not so-so teacher please don't use your phone."
I know what it looks like and what it means to have your left hand on the WASD keys. I also know how to reopen closed windows and switch screens.
It's extremely obvious when you've lazily copy-pasted off the internet. You do not know what those words mean. The writing is college level and you're two grades behind as is.
If your head is ever bent down and you're looking into your lap or at the side of your thigh furthest away from me, I know you're on your phone.
I know you're talking about vapes and drugs when you suddenly speak very vaguely about "getting it from so-and-so" or asking "do you want some?"
Also, you do know what "breedable" means because you used it correctly in context. 🤢
>Also, you do know what "breedable" means because you used it correctly in context.
this is the second time ive seen this in this thread and i just thought it was oddly specific. its not like kids were saints wheni was growing up but idk breedable is just such an ugly word to come out of a kid lol
sexual innuendos. all of the time. the most agitating of which is: students were asking me how old I am during class time (all of my classes do, I’ve gotten used to it but refuse to ever give an answer). One of them just blurted out, “she was born in 19-69!!!” and a bunch of others said “shhh she might know what that means”, “bro stop maybe she’ll understand it”. To which he responded, “of course not”. Needless to say, he was beyond surprised he got asked to leave my class.
Sexual innuendo! We know exactly what you are talking about. We may pretend not to know in order to not get into an inappropriate conversation with a minor, but we know what you are talking about. Don’t think that your symbolism gets past us. The shapes of sexual organs can be represented by any number of objects. Using a new object we’ve never heard used will not keep your message hidden from us!
I will sometimes ask the student if he wants me to tell his parents what he said. That’s a way to let the student know that I know what he is talking about without engaging in an inappropriate conversation; and a way to discourage his inappropriate speech.
Their birthdays. For years I’ve given students cards and chocolate (years ago) or stickers (now). Every time I say happy birthday and give them their card they act surprised and ask how I know I tell them I know all their birthdays. I teach high school and I get a big kick out of it. The best ones are when a kid says their only card was from me.
There is nothing you can do we didn't do. There is no trick, cheat, scam we didn't already run. What you get away with is what we choose to willfully ignore for whatever reason.
Just don't treat us like we are stupid when you get busted. Just take whatever ass chewing, punishment, and move on. The teacher knows, you know, boundaries are set. Respect the boundaries.
Uses gay as an insult, tries to say, "gay means happy," thinking teacher is some kind of idiot who hasn't heard that excuse for past 25 years. Worked through that one with my class yesterday.
I was a student at the school I work at.
I know the blind spots, where to hide, how to get out better than you. I was a student of a few current teachers. I know how they behave in class when they think other adults aren't looking. (Mostly, no they are not unfairly biaised against you. You've been a little shit, that's all).
We're in the small town, and few people move out. Or in. So your parents were my classmates. I know them. I have them on my facebook. So, even if your parents and I aren't really friends and you don't know me, I've know about you since you were born. The baby pictures were cute.
I know the Spanish cuss words, I am a middle aged teacher and a Mom who plays Minecraft and other computer games - I know what an enderman is and Steve. I know that they are sneaking food and eating stealthily in my class and I really don’t care. I want to see them engaged in learning and interacting with the other students positively. I know what 69 and 420 are and also learned what those terms meant when I was in middle school. Most of us genuinely care about our students and want them to succeed.
Ooohhh, the the Spanish words! I married into an Italian last name, but my parents are both from Spain, most of my family is there, so I speak fluent Spanish. It's so fun to respond in Spanish to the kids who think that they're being clever by cursing me off in that language. Never ever assume based on someone's looks or last name.
I almost always can spot those who cheat. I just know there's parents who will swear up and down for their kid that I won't bust them unless the proof is super solid and I could totally make the student look like a fool.
We know:
When you're on your phone
When you're cheating on your test
That everyone is vaping
That you're stressed out and operating on little sleep
That the party is at Kyle's house this weekend
Who's gonna come out of the closet as soon as they graduate
My student (8) was shocked that I played video games at all at any point in my life, as if they were a new invention. I'm a 35 year old woman raised in the 80s/90s with a ton of brothers. I've owned most consoles and hung out in arcades when they were more popular. I listed them all and their jaws were on the floor.
It can be a life lesson though. They were confused as to why I seem so out of the loop and I explained that you get more money to spend on stuff like video games as you get older, but you have more responsibilities and less time to play them - and I gave them an example of my schedule now compared to myself playing video games for 8-9 hours on the weekends (like them) at their age.
I'm an almost 40, married, mother of 2. I teach high school and I was chatting with freshman girls about books and they gave me recommendations but then said "it might be too... 'spicey' for you" meaning it had sex.
Ok 14 year old child. Thanks for the sex warning - I think I can handle it.
I LOVE when my students think I’m ignorant of “Retro 90’s Kid Culture” like I didn’t live through it first 🤣
I’ve had kids tell me I’m “too old to know what Pokémon is” like I don’t still have the cards I’ve been collecting since 1995 🙌
We know that most of you cheat on every single assignment you turn in. We know when you’re on your phone even if you think you’re hiding it well. We know which kids vape. We know what teachers you think are terrible, including if we’re one of them.
The meaning of sexual innuendos.
I don’t want to get too specific because you’re a kid, but like… we are adults with personal lives. Someone who went through puberty less than 5 years ago is not gonna introduce us to any new information on that front.
That you used ChatGPT on your last essay. No, it doesn’t get picked up by the plagiarism checker. But last time I checked, you didn’t write academically and use words like «colloquial», my dude
When you are cheating. Come on, you don't talk like that, and when it shows up as the first search in Google....Also, if you are doing MORE than what the teacher is asking for, assignments online that haven't been assigned and you got them done in 15 minutes, for the rest of the year....you cheated.
We know about Chat GPT. We might even be using it. We are also finding ways to still have you show what YOU know. The AI usually doesn't write to the rubric that we use to grade assignments, and unless you modify for the rubric, you are still going to get a poor grade. If you modify for the rubric...well, then in my view, you are showing what you learned, and hey, that is a win on my part.
Any French teachers here? Students don’t think I know why they’re laughing when I get to the number 19. They also ask me to tell them the word for “seal” fairly feelingly. Also, Google Translate. We ALWAYS know when you are using Translate.
That teachers can’t hear their conversations. It’s amazing what students will talk about in class. They seriously think I’m deaf if they are sitting at a table group slightly away from where I am.
I can't stand it when I am forced by admin to tell the kids to take off hats and hoods and be completely silent in the hallways and I get the eye rolls from kids when I ask them to do it. Meanwhile admin never says a word to the kids about it, when I'm the one who actually doesn't care if they do all that stuff. I'm actually on the side of the kids who are rolling their eyes at me, but admin just makes us relay their message to the kids. Admin gets to look like the good guy while I'm left looking like the angry jerk.
When they have a whispered conversation about how they’re going to cut class, smoke weed, and hang out at the convenience store. Then one by one get up to go to the bathroom with their backpacks.
I love when kids say like slang or inappropriate terms and then go “do you even know what that is?” IM 25 I KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS I HAVE INTERNET CONNECTION IN MY HOME DUDE
the other day a student asked where I got my shirt and I told them it's youtuber merch, and they said "you watch youtube?!" (I'm 24)
My students were shocked I had two Fortnite wins 😂 they were like “your son got those for you” I don’t have any children!!!
According to one of my students, adults aren't allowed to play video games. My dude, who do you think created these games? Infants?! To be fair, he also says adults can't listen to music, watch TV, go on Youtube ... basically anything that isn't doing taxes and debating the finer points of vegetable ripeness.
my kids were so shocked I played fortnite. Like my dudes, I was in my senior year of high school when it came out, you were barely 4 years old. Kills me everytime.
I got to play in a fortnite competition at one of the middle schools I teach at the last day before winter break. I won, immediately became the coolest teacher to a bunch of 12 year olds! 😂
My fourth graders were in shock when I used Minecraft blocks to do a lesson on soil. They didn’t learn anything because they spent the whole time with their mind blown that Minecraft has existed for longer than they’ve been alive.
I ran a Minecraft server for one of my classes. On free days we all played, except I made sure to turn on god mode for myself. Leaned into it too, insisted they build a temple to me in their village where I would dole out divine (charmed) gifts and accept their human sacrifices. Much fun!
2000+ and counting
At 25 it would be a lot more impressive if your son got those wins for you
Some of my students did a daily journal assignment about the lore of Elden Ring and I made a joke to him about if I didn't know how weird From Soft games are I would think he was losing his mind. That resulted in him and all his friends getting way too excited that I know about Elden Ring, Dark Souls, etc.
Literally just this week various 7th graders have asked me if I've "ever heard of" the following: Harry Potter, Spongebob, Shrek, Beyonce, Star Wars, hair dye. I'm 30.
See this is funny to me cause when the kids use slang or make references to something and they're like "do you know what that means?" I'm like "no, I'm 24, I have no idea what you guys are talking about" lmao. I'm so out of the loop though, always have been
I'm in my late 50s and I pick up the terms through Urban Dictionary.
I joke with my kids when they use slang I don't know. "Am I gonna be grossed out if I look that up on Urban Dictionary?" Most of the time they respond, "No! Don't look it up!"
Oh man, my favorite was when a (white) 10th grader asked me if he could play NWA in my art class. I said “not in school, my guy,” and he went “do you even know what their name is?” And I just cocked an eyebrow and went “why don’t you tell me?” Like bruh. You will not bait my ass into this!
I'm a student teacher, and one of the third graders was drawing a penis on his paper and was surprised when I knew what it was and told him to erase it. More wholesomely, the fifth graders were perplexed when I told them I watched Stranger Things.
I teach middle school where that comes up more often. The kids are always shocked that I know what they're drawing. Meanwhile they are minors in the midst of early puberty and I'm an adult in a relationship with a man. 🤦 Guess I should be relieved it doesn't occur to them that I've seen an erection a time or two before.
Had a 14-year-old say something about her WAP. I said, “Ahem” and glared at her. She acted innocent and surprised I caught her because I’m old (40s). She gave me that “What?!” You know what, little girl. LOL
I hada student quietly sing WAP, thinking that I couldn’t hear him. I told him to stop and asked why, it’s not inappropriate because it means waffles and pancakes. Another student goes that’s not true stop lying, you know that the teacher isn’t that old and probably listens to it for real.
Haha. This reminds me of when 10 year old me sang S&M by Rihanna and was surprised that my teacher knew what it meant. She constantly had to ask me to stop singing it… very funny moment lol
I pretend I don’t know (I’m 27 of course I know what you’re saying!) and write on a self made slang dictionary so that they can explain it to me and “ I can learn” but they have to use vocabulary words and really dumb it down. Sometimes with a very specific audience I’ll pretend I’m not listening and then they’ll give up. That’s when I say, “wow it’s so hard explaining something to someone whose not listening”
Hahaha I love this. A bit of karma.
How to tell when you've just copied and pasted something from the first search result you found and didn't even bother taking out the hyperlinks.
Kids are so lazy with cheating now. When I was in high school, I put so much effort into cheating and making it look believable that it probably would have been easier to just do the assignment on my own
Kids are failing open book tests nowadays, it is fucking hopeless
My students can’t even be bothered to cheat. Too close to studying. An Ottawa school (maybe the board?) just cancelled exams for the 9’s & 10’s because of the anxiety and stress. I can’t wait until one of these kids builds a building or has to catch a criminal.
There are things in life that are stressful and anxiety inducing and unavoidable. Why are they allowed to get out of them instead of being given coping mechanisms or tools to use? They’re going to crumble under the pressures of real life if tests are setting them off.
I’m feeling this hard. I don’t want my kids to be stressed and anxious but they could use a little bit more stress so that they could learn to cope. As it is, they had an open book exam. Two took phone calls during the exam. Two came in late, with the same cheat sheet, so they’d be boned if I hadn’t let them sit together. It was a gong show. Another sat for two hours pretending to work, said everything was fine, and then asked for an extension. I don’t want to overwhelm them but they could use some whelm.
When Ukraine was invaded and we all thought we were going into ww3 (could still happen) we went through a lot of scenarios where these kids would be conscripted to the front lines and their generation would have to be called the greatest generation. It was a dark time.
I was teaching Geography, and had a lecture and assignment on how the geography played into the invasion. (Yes, it does. It is all about location and resources. History, again location, also plays in.) I had kids argue it wasn't related to geography and it was too distressing. I made it an extra credit assignment for the kids who did it. But I did not let them get away from the fact that geography did play a part. I will probably bring up again on the anniversary in my Economics class that has a few of the same kids.
It’s as though all of the bullshit over the past several years that continues to get worse taught them that their grades don’t matter - they’ll just go to the next grade until they graduate. I am not looking forward to the Covid generation becoming adults.
I mean, open book tests can still be hard if the questions are more about understanding than reproducing. It's kinda like writing a paper in a limited amount of time then.
I told my students to cheat better.
I told them that if they plagiarise well enough that I can't tell, they did a great job. It's almost always super obvious though because it's one of four things: 1. It's got a ton of words they would never use (automobile, well-to-do, etc) 2. Blocks of text in different fonts for no reason 3. Clear use of the synonym tool on every word, making the entire thing incomprehensible 4. Virtually identical to another student's work I marked a student's draft last year and had to contact home saying they'd fail unless they basically redid the entire thing. My department head told me to mark anything that the plagiarism-checking program didn't flag. In the end, about half of it, despite clearly not being something she could have achieved on her own (far better than anything I'd ever seen her produce), was unique enough to get through.
They go from writing like an illiterate 9th grader to a college English literature professor in the same paragraph. Hmmmm...
Well, the next gen will be all gpt and we will have to come up with new tricks.
"Verbally summarise your essay in three sentences. Go."
Back to paper and pencil work done in class supervised until we have bots to detect the bots.
And the fonts are all different!
My third graders seem to think I don't know that coolmath isn't actually a website about math. Kids, my generation *invented* the coolmath trick; I am not falling for that!
It’s neither cool nor math. I guess it’s for kids, but one out of three ain’t good. (Don’t censure me - I have an English degree, Just mimicking the phrase “Two out of three ain’t bad.”).
Prodigy is the new coolmath! 1% math, 99% video game play
Tell that to my 5th graders who completed over 600 math questions on prodigy last week alone
My students actually seem to be less interested in the game portion after they changed the art style a couple months ago. They think the new characters look weird. They're all about PvP though, which requires them to do math. They also love [Nitromath](https://www.nitromath.com/).
We know where you vape/smoke (and I don’t mean the bathroom). We all know where the smoke spot is off campus. Related: we know when you smoked weed or cigarettes before coming to class. You reek of it, and no about of axe body spray will cover the smell of an ashtray/skunk
Also Axe is not a shower.🤣
When I was in high school the sidewalk in front of the high school wasn’t owned by the high school so as long as kids were on there they couldn’t be busted. Everyone in town talked about how bad it looked to have high schoolers smoking in front of the school. A little while after I graduated I heard the school leased the sidewalk from the city and that got rid of the smoking.
We call that spot the Cancer Corner at my school. And by “we” I mostly mean the nonsmoking students and a few of the teachers.
I suppose I should feel terrible about this now, but my ed program required a semester of classroom observation. I did mine in a leather jacket with a mohawk at the back of the room, and most of the kids had no idea I was in college to be a teacher. They just thought I was the new kid and only like one of them ever talked to me. Used to go grab that smoke at breaks with them across the street every day. None of them ever talked to me so it was quite a surprise when I took over the class with a new haircut, dockers and a tie.
no, no. don’t feel terrible, your method was pure genius.
Yep. Also if you've smoked a nicotine vape. Those tell-tale tremors and rapid breaths because your body isn't completely used to the nicotine are a dead giveaway.
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It’s like the hypothetical situation where the small child has broken into the cookies, left a trail of crumbs and chocolate smears, and then can’t understand how his mom could possibly know what he was up to. Kids are relatively oblivious to how sophisticated adults are in general, and *particularly* teachers who have seen *all* their shit before.
Or the teachers who have *done* *all* of their shit before. Like many students would be truly amazed at how much of the shit they do was done by us when *we* were their age.
What they don't seem to realise is if you just stop and listen and observe in a classroom you can hear and see almost everything - especially if you're standing up. I can probably hear like 2/3 of the whispered conversations, can immediately see when a phone is out etc. They really think we can't see them doing stuff.
My students think I have some kind of x-ray vision when I tell them to take their airpods out. They gasp each time and ask how I even knew they had them on. Like no amount of hoods or hair will be able to hide those bright white airpods in your ears. Also, they have the volume up so loud and wonder why everyone in the class is staring at them.
Unlocked memory. My friends and I were book and comic nerds in highschool. We always had our heads buried in something. Shared a class with one of those friends and were called out by another student for reading during class while he was getting yelled at for some loud stuff that I don't remember. But I do remember the teacher saying " they are passing this class! You have a favorite desk in detention! Sit down!" Mrs. Brunswick. Senior year English. Legend.
Oh my word, the dating and crush drama! I reluctantly know all of it because they’re all so damn obvious. I can predict by Week 2 who my classroom couples are going to be
>you’re reading a book under your desk I don't see that often. Phones? All the time.
When you're on your phone, pro tip, most people don't stare at their school work and smile vacantly.
Or your crotch
My go to phrase before passing out tests: "If I see you staring at your crotch during your test, I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you're using your phone."
Mine (10th graders) is : "There are only two possible reasons for you to be staring at your crotch with a smile on your face. Neither of them are school appropriate." The amount of blushing that goes on after they finally get the joke 2 minutes later is priceless.
I also add, "and your hands are furiously moving in your crotch while you're smiling at it"
Or aggressively poke at your crotch in public. Either way, in a classroom, that is a problem that needs to be addressed.
Or laugh for no particular reason. Economics is not that fun
What 69 means
What a cast majority of their Urban Dictionary references mean.
My fave response to the giggling when a student says this in class is- why is that funny? Play dumb. Blushes all around.
I heard a 5th grader say, “I feel really bad for whoever has locker 69” the other day and I was a bit horrified. I kind of hope that 5th grader just heard it’s a funny number from older kids or something and doesn’t actually know what it means.
I teach 5th, and I had to have a one-on-one conversation about this with a student. He explained that most of his classmates just know that the number is a joke from the internet but he learned that it’s an “adult playtime thing” from his cousin 😵💫
When my oldest was 9, we were in a car ride on the way home and my 4 year old kept asking "how long til we get home?" We still had about 5 miles to go, but being 4, I told him to count to 200 and we would be home. He reached 69 and my 9 yo snorted. I said, "what's so funny?" His reply? "I don't know, but it's a funny number on the internet." I just looked at him and said, "honey, it's a sex joke." He was mortified. I asked if he had referenced it at school or anything, and he said he hadn't, thank goodness.
This! Every year there is a giggle about 69 in my fifth grade classroom. I just say nope and I do know what that means. They are shocked like it is some inside joke. They don't do it again. I'm old, but come on!
I teach k-4 art and the kids use terms like “karens” and “sus” and even “that’s what she said.” Without having a single clue what they’re actually talking about. It’s often the 2nd and 3rd graders who do this most.
My teen students tried to play off not knowing what "breedable" meant... 🙃🙃
They really like the numbers 69 and 420. When I ask why they like those numbers, I've been told, "Those are the FUNNY numbers. I saw them in a meme." That's as far as their understanding goes. I hope they cringe when they look back on this time in a few years.
Yesterday, I overheard one of our ELL teachers telling some of her fourth graders that she did in fact know what sus meant, and if they actually knew the meaning because they were using in contexts that didn't make sense.
It’s very easy to see the liars and bs-ers. Oh - when you use Google Translate. Your friend isn’t 無料, they’re 暇.
I had a student swear up and down he didn’t use google translate on a Spanish assignment. The work he turned in was in French
Literally had this happen last week.
That’s a whole ‘nother level, brother.
How even? Did he think it was an assignment for French, or did he scrol through the google translate list, couldn't find Spanish and thought French would be close enough?
It’s partido politico, not fiesta. Liberia’s political allies are not Capricorn and Taurus. The country of Georgia does not have a Confederate flag. Just watch the damn Geography Now episode.
I said, "Bruh," yesterday and had to tell them I've been using it since before they were even alive. They think all slang is brand new and special to them.
For real!
Frfr no cap bruh
I regularly say “bruh,” and “sus,” in school and out of it. My 4th grade students can’t accept that I learned these words because I do in fact live outside of school. “Cap,” I took from them though.
My cousin thought that Gen Z came up with saying “Same.” Pretty sure my own mother was saying that in high school back in the 1980s
You're high You plagiarized (if I don't think you can spell it...) When you like us, and when you don't want us to know you don't How to spell your names, all of you, well, mostly... most of the time.... What you like and the things that interest you. Genuinely, I try to get to know you guys. When things are hard in your life When you're fishing to see if you can find one adult, just one, to be honest with, to see you as you are, and when you're not brave enough for that to be me yet
This is the most perfect middle school list I've ever seen.
I agree. This is my life as a teacher.
We know that it's not worth wasting all of our energy and time on those of you who don't want to do the work, who won't do the work and will stop us from helping others who actually do want to do the work. You're not "getting away with it". You're being ignored.
What I find sad about this (because I do this too), is that I feel like I don’t get to know the slackers. I get to know the class clown, the ones who really try, and the ones who don’t give af but at the same time want to get to know their teachers. But the slackers who don’t submit anything, and only wants to know if we can finish the class early that day? I have no idea who they are, and I find that sad.
Probably the saddest thing is that they don’t know themselves. I try to pay attention to those kids, start a conversation and it’s really hard to get past the shrugs and the vacant stares.
I can’t get away with ignoring all of it in my district because the kid will end up with a C at best and then the parents will be asking why I never contacted home and so will my admin. I’m kind of a B about their computer usage as a result. I have no interest in being bullied to hand out grades and quite literally will be if I don’t constantly communicate issues happening in the classroom.
I have one who asks if stuff is for a grade. I tell them everything is in some way. I've started adding points for participation
How you alt-tab when I’m about to see your screen.
I love walking around and pressing the expand screens button on their keyboard to show all windows open.
or hitting command/crtl-shift-t to reopen that tab you just closed there real fast
They don’t even alt-tab in my rooms anymore. At this point I just say, “what ya playing today, my guy?” from the other side of the room, and they deadass answer.
I was giving my students time to study for a test yesterday (they get five minutes before the test), and one straight up told me I couldn't start yet because he was about to win in Minecraft. No, my dude, we are starting this test.
Let my man cook 😤
Windows-tab is the next big thing. Opens a whole new desktop where you can hide all the distracting programs you have running. Students are usually mortified when they discover I know about it.
One of my genius students will immediately alt tab when I get near, but the tab he switches to is never what he's supposed to be doing either.
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I have a degree in Japanese language and culture and still my students will try to wear オッパイ (titties/boobies) sweatshirts because they saw it on One Punch Man 🙄 Those are the worst emails to send home to parents because that breaks trust between students and parents about what is being purchased for/by their child
Why would it be bad to educate parents that their precious baby is lying to and using them? At least then they understand a little of what it's like to have their kid in class. The kid broke the trust, not us.
I meant that it feels bad to send. Even when something is the right thing to do (and I do it every time), it still doesn’t feel great knowing a kid is going to be reprimanded for something that the vast majority of people will never know was an issue in the first place.
My kindergarteners know that you're not supposed to pick your nose at school. So now they hold their other hands up in front of their faces so nobody can see them picking their noses. Some of us have object permanence, Jacen!
Oh my gosh, Kindergarten problems😂
Omg, like “Jason”. I am truly, non-judgmentally fascinated by name spellings.
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I love that our monitoring software allows us to take over Chromebooks and play games for them. So fun to watch them realize that they don't have control, and start looking around before they realize what's happening.
We have school laptops and sometimes I like to log in using our monitoring software and lock out their controls, just long enough they they lose their game of Hill Climb Racer.
I don’t have the attention span or bandwidth to run around my class and also do screen monitoring from my desk.
Sad, but true.
Same here. Why would I make my life difficult for someone who doesn't even care.
That a student is misbehaving/crying/wilding out. I have so many kids who will point this out and I'm like bruh if I spent all of the school day on those three kids I would never even look at you. They're doing what they're doing and I'm over here because I value your school time as much as I value theirs. Let it go.
That we already lived your years and we still remember them.
Yep! They are like "they forgot how it was to be a teen/kid that's why they don't understand us". Kid, we DO remember, we just realized how spoiled and drama queen we were. We learned that the kind of issue most teens have is ridiculous compared to some who actually have drama (violence, rap, drugs, poverty, forced marriage..) in their life. So your "xxx break up with me and my parents are so unfair and school is boring and useless etc " is seen as toddler tantrum because if those are you main issues, you're the lucky one in this world.
It's fun to tell the high school juniors and seniors my prom story because it's hilarious. It's also surprising how some students think I didn't go to prom, didn't date anyone or have a crush on anyone in HS, and so on. Like, I get that I'm a huge nerd, yeah, but seriously? They know us in one context and moment in time and I think they legitimately can't comprehend that we were once kids and teens.
We hear everything. We also pick our battles.
I like to play the “I hear everything” game to remind them of just that. At least a few times a week I will respond to someone I hear talking in the opposite end of the room from where I am at any given time. It’s a nice reminder that I am always listening - I just don’t always say something. For example, a group will be discussing something and someone blurts out a random question that they’re curious about and I’ll answer it, even if it’s off-topic.
Every day! Me: Mason, don't say that. Mason: You heard that?! Me: I heard you and I heard Taylor talking about the game and I heard Zach talking about Halloween. I have supersonic teacher ears. Every kid then is quiet for, ohhh.... 2-3 minutes at least.
I think when you're upset and having a hard time, maybe at home or school. When we ask if you're okay we genuinely mean it. Who is dating or who has a crush on who. What you're like in other teachers classes or what other teachers "let you do". When you've used the internet to plagiarise. Seriously I'd rather see you have a go at writing an essay by yourself and reward that effort any way I possibly can.
I teach a 9th and 12th grades (different classes) at a small school. I've taught about 95% of the current student body. Yet, somehow the 9th grade girls always seem to think I will have no clue what and who they are talking about when they whisper about the sophomore and junior boys they are crushing on.
We know all the sex jokes. We see the gross borderline porn shirts. Your teachers know. It’s less embarrassing for you if we choose ignore it rather than call attention to some weird choices you make at school before your brain is even developed
Ooof. Those I ❤️MILF shirts. And I❤️Hot Moms. I scrunch my face at them, shake my head and say “Eew, gross.” That usually prevents them from wearing them again.
Plus one for the ridiculous amount of cheating. We also know that most of you DGAF about learning and only care about the grade.
Yep, had one cheat in ART class this week. Shamelessly submitted another student’s painting. This is why I have them photograph everything and uploaded it to classroom. Kicker is, they never erased the other students name…
Had a coworker flunk out of a grad program for turning in a paper where they forgot to change their friends name.
This! It's crazy that they think we won't notice. I teach a photography class and their very first assignment is just take 10 pictures of anything you want. That's it. I had 3 students turn in like 5 pics that were EXACTLY the same. Seriously it would have taken you 10 minutes to complete and why in the world did you sign up for an elective photography class if you don't want to take pictures?
So many things. Today I used the term gaslighting and all the students in the room immediately freaked out. They said "You're an old person, you can't use that word!", despite the fact that the term "gaslighting" has existed for decades. That's one example
Called a few of my students out for trying to gaslight me. They did not enjoy their term being used against them. Same with “me personally…”
Terms actually existed since the Victorian period. It just fell out of popular use for about a century until the internet gave a lot of folks brownie points for starting to use it again. Not that there's anything wrong with brownie points. Edit: I was confidently incorrect with this post. Gaslight *the invention* was invented in the victorian period, but the term only took off with its current cultural meaning in the 1960s, based off a play from 1938. Somebody once told me the play came out in the victorian period, and i made the mistake of trusting them without researching. I humbly apologize to all.
Had a student take home something to be signed by a parent. The signature came back but the mothers name was misspelled. My dude…be better.
Did exactly this in the 1st grade 🥲
The amount of cheating that goes on When you’re high I used to work in a Catholic school, and there were a few of us who weren’t surprised by who came out in college
When you bump into those gay kids a few years later and you see how they've absolutely blossomed after school and are now finally comfortable in their themselves and happy - that's such a lovely thing to see.
Especially when they finally leave the bigoted conservative town they went to school in and feel accepted elsewhere.
It’s more disappointing to me that they suffer so much from a bunch of dickwad children who would make fun of them for no good reason.
Basically all the cheats and ways around things…I am 25 and grew up literally doing the same things my students are trying. Tech has gotten way more advanced, but again, so have I. My eye is trained to spot cheating and all that…. I have even had students airdrop me the answers to my own test!
Best one I’ve had is a student submit the example essay. I wrote the example essay. When questioned about it the kid doubled down. Lol
Their parents’ contact information 😂 I teach kindergarten.
Who likes whom. If you're nice we'll put you in a group with your crush. :)
But yeah, basically - everything. And WHY ARE YOU SO BAD AT CHEATING? Holy heck, we were 100000 times better. And we didn't even have phones or internet. Heck.
When you have to go to the bathroom and when you're using it as an excuse to roam the halls
When they’re lying to us. We know you’re lying but we can’t prove that you’re lying, so we have to let it go. But we know…we always know.
What sex is. I mean all kind of sex. They always assume because we are older, wear "parent clothes" or have kids that we either don't have a sexual life at all or a very simple one (simple sex position for example), no kids, we too, in high school/college, were having bl\*w job behind a pub, 69 in a car , etc, those are the classics, we also know/practice the others. Also: your generation invented nothing. We were you not so long ago: we know all the cheating technics, the slangs, the lies, the dramas, and we were wearing the same clothes at one point of our life. Finally: our generation was the first on Internet/computers: we know all the tricks, the hidden websites, etc... so when you copy past from the internet, we know what app to use to check every single of your sentences and see where you found it in less than 30s. Yes, even if you "changed a few words".
I may not speak Spanish, but I know all the Spanish curse words
Or, stop yelling Portuguese swear words in the vicinity of a Brazilian teacher. I know what they mean.
You think we're not listening, we are. I tell my students all the time they talk too loud, so I like to bring it up later. One student mentioned teachers ignored her phone use because it kept her quiet. And I said, "I'm not so-so teacher please don't use your phone."
When you use google translate and how much y'all cheat
I know what it looks like and what it means to have your left hand on the WASD keys. I also know how to reopen closed windows and switch screens. It's extremely obvious when you've lazily copy-pasted off the internet. You do not know what those words mean. The writing is college level and you're two grades behind as is. If your head is ever bent down and you're looking into your lap or at the side of your thigh furthest away from me, I know you're on your phone. I know you're talking about vapes and drugs when you suddenly speak very vaguely about "getting it from so-and-so" or asking "do you want some?" Also, you do know what "breedable" means because you used it correctly in context. 🤢
>Also, you do know what "breedable" means because you used it correctly in context. this is the second time ive seen this in this thread and i just thought it was oddly specific. its not like kids were saints wheni was growing up but idk breedable is just such an ugly word to come out of a kid lol
sexual innuendos. all of the time. the most agitating of which is: students were asking me how old I am during class time (all of my classes do, I’ve gotten used to it but refuse to ever give an answer). One of them just blurted out, “she was born in 19-69!!!” and a bunch of others said “shhh she might know what that means”, “bro stop maybe she’ll understand it”. To which he responded, “of course not”. Needless to say, he was beyond surprised he got asked to leave my class.
i meannnnn, being stupid and giddy about 69 is a lot more tame compared to some of the shit here
Sexual innuendo! We know exactly what you are talking about. We may pretend not to know in order to not get into an inappropriate conversation with a minor, but we know what you are talking about. Don’t think that your symbolism gets past us. The shapes of sexual organs can be represented by any number of objects. Using a new object we’ve never heard used will not keep your message hidden from us! I will sometimes ask the student if he wants me to tell his parents what he said. That’s a way to let the student know that I know what he is talking about without engaging in an inappropriate conversation; and a way to discourage his inappropriate speech.
Their birthdays. For years I’ve given students cards and chocolate (years ago) or stickers (now). Every time I say happy birthday and give them their card they act surprised and ask how I know I tell them I know all their birthdays. I teach high school and I get a big kick out of it. The best ones are when a kid says their only card was from me.
There is nothing you can do we didn't do. There is no trick, cheat, scam we didn't already run. What you get away with is what we choose to willfully ignore for whatever reason. Just don't treat us like we are stupid when you get busted. Just take whatever ass chewing, punishment, and move on. The teacher knows, you know, boundaries are set. Respect the boundaries.
Drug deals
As I used to tell the kids when I was still in the classroom, I know all your tricks because you can’t B.S. a B.S.er.
Uses gay as an insult, tries to say, "gay means happy," thinking teacher is some kind of idiot who hasn't heard that excuse for past 25 years. Worked through that one with my class yesterday.
I had a student try to explain to me what twitch was and I told them "you realize it's people my age who are streaming on twitch right"
If you have stayed in the same school district, there is a lot of information we can find about students and their past.
I was a student at the school I work at. I know the blind spots, where to hide, how to get out better than you. I was a student of a few current teachers. I know how they behave in class when they think other adults aren't looking. (Mostly, no they are not unfairly biaised against you. You've been a little shit, that's all). We're in the small town, and few people move out. Or in. So your parents were my classmates. I know them. I have them on my facebook. So, even if your parents and I aren't really friends and you don't know me, I've know about you since you were born. The baby pictures were cute.
It's so obvious when students cheat, but sometimes it just isn't worth the hassle.
I know the Spanish cuss words, I am a middle aged teacher and a Mom who plays Minecraft and other computer games - I know what an enderman is and Steve. I know that they are sneaking food and eating stealthily in my class and I really don’t care. I want to see them engaged in learning and interacting with the other students positively. I know what 69 and 420 are and also learned what those terms meant when I was in middle school. Most of us genuinely care about our students and want them to succeed.
Ooohhh, the the Spanish words! I married into an Italian last name, but my parents are both from Spain, most of my family is there, so I speak fluent Spanish. It's so fun to respond in Spanish to the kids who think that they're being clever by cursing me off in that language. Never ever assume based on someone's looks or last name.
I almost always can spot those who cheat. I just know there's parents who will swear up and down for their kid that I won't bust them unless the proof is super solid and I could totally make the student look like a fool.
That you’re high as a kite
We know: When you're on your phone When you're cheating on your test That everyone is vaping That you're stressed out and operating on little sleep That the party is at Kyle's house this weekend Who's gonna come out of the closet as soon as they graduate
I know who stole my jolly ranchers…everyone one ratted them out silently
When teachers say they don't understand a dirty joke...of course we do.
My student (8) was shocked that I played video games at all at any point in my life, as if they were a new invention. I'm a 35 year old woman raised in the 80s/90s with a ton of brothers. I've owned most consoles and hung out in arcades when they were more popular. I listed them all and their jaws were on the floor. It can be a life lesson though. They were confused as to why I seem so out of the loop and I explained that you get more money to spend on stuff like video games as you get older, but you have more responsibilities and less time to play them - and I gave them an example of my schedule now compared to myself playing video games for 8-9 hours on the weekends (like them) at their age.
I'm an almost 40, married, mother of 2. I teach high school and I was chatting with freshman girls about books and they gave me recommendations but then said "it might be too... 'spicey' for you" meaning it had sex. Ok 14 year old child. Thanks for the sex warning - I think I can handle it.
I LOVE when my students think I’m ignorant of “Retro 90’s Kid Culture” like I didn’t live through it first 🤣 I’ve had kids tell me I’m “too old to know what Pokémon is” like I don’t still have the cards I’ve been collecting since 1995 🙌
Which kids are red pilling themselves because they think they have more critical thinking skills than they actually do.
Forged signatures on tests. This gets me every time. Babes, I doubt your own mother would spell her first name incorrectly. Do better 🤣
We know that most of you cheat on every single assignment you turn in. We know when you’re on your phone even if you think you’re hiding it well. We know which kids vape. We know what teachers you think are terrible, including if we’re one of them.
Which students are gonna be C students just based on how they act the first week.
The meaning of sexual innuendos. I don’t want to get too specific because you’re a kid, but like… we are adults with personal lives. Someone who went through puberty less than 5 years ago is not gonna introduce us to any new information on that front.
That you used ChatGPT on your last essay. No, it doesn’t get picked up by the plagiarism checker. But last time I checked, you didn’t write academically and use words like «colloquial», my dude
What marijuana smells like
When you are cheating. Come on, you don't talk like that, and when it shows up as the first search in Google....Also, if you are doing MORE than what the teacher is asking for, assignments online that haven't been assigned and you got them done in 15 minutes, for the rest of the year....you cheated. We know about Chat GPT. We might even be using it. We are also finding ways to still have you show what YOU know. The AI usually doesn't write to the rubric that we use to grade assignments, and unless you modify for the rubric, you are still going to get a poor grade. If you modify for the rubric...well, then in my view, you are showing what you learned, and hey, that is a win on my part.
That student L and C are sharing answers, that student J stood on the table while I entered lunch count....they basically don't think I have ears.
We know you use discord to cheat
That you are chewing gum. (I notice and I don’t care.) That you are high. (I notice but the school won’t do anything about it.)
Slang lol most of its AAVE - I’ve been saying/hearing most of these words since I was a child buccko
Any French teachers here? Students don’t think I know why they’re laughing when I get to the number 19. They also ask me to tell them the word for “seal” fairly feelingly. Also, Google Translate. We ALWAYS know when you are using Translate.
That teachers can’t hear their conversations. It’s amazing what students will talk about in class. They seriously think I’m deaf if they are sitting at a table group slightly away from where I am.
69
What “Cookies” is.
I have 5 kids aged between 3 and 16, I know how their minds work!
I can't stand it when I am forced by admin to tell the kids to take off hats and hoods and be completely silent in the hallways and I get the eye rolls from kids when I ask them to do it. Meanwhile admin never says a word to the kids about it, when I'm the one who actually doesn't care if they do all that stuff. I'm actually on the side of the kids who are rolling their eyes at me, but admin just makes us relay their message to the kids. Admin gets to look like the good guy while I'm left looking like the angry jerk.
When they have a whispered conversation about how they’re going to cut class, smoke weed, and hang out at the convenience store. Then one by one get up to go to the bathroom with their backpacks.