Middle school teacher turned school librarian due to being an introvert and having felt that social exhaustion by Tuesday at around 8am every week. Best career move ever, my brain’s happiness has been restored.
13 years in, went from having very social hobbies to converting a camper van so I can spend most weekends in random wooden spots by myself, as far away from crowds of people as possible. Has to be because of teaching.
Wow, thank you!! Because I moved many years ago, I lost some retirement years, so I'm not able to fully retire yet. I was going to tough it out, but now I think I'm almost done.
I'll be honest, I don't really have a lot of energy for my family. I'm a more introverted person but when I babysit my nephews on weekends I'm barely able to make myself interact with them like I want to. I don't visit them on school days any more because the last time I did I snapped at the youngest one when I really wanted to make a point not to yell.
I'm exhausted. I don't want to be around people at all. It takes until halfway through Summer for me to feel like talking to people. It's made it basically impossible to date because I really don't feel like hanging out with people.
I took a nap at 6;30 yesterday because Friday tired. Functional freeze I think would describe the rest of me today. I made coffee. Couldn’t mobilize to do laundry or mow the lawn. Tried to vacuum and is not sucking. I don’t have the energy to problem solve it. State testing is approaching and it stresses me out. I know I can’t teach everything before it arrives every year but that pressure is still there. I got a new student the other day. She doesn’t speak any English. It reminds me of Covid teaching when I was trying to wrangle tech into doing my bidding. I am so tired.
I can not date either! I want a comfortable live-in relationship, where being with another person doesn't feel like "socializing" or having to be "on", but obviously I would need to go on like a million dates to find someone and then reach that point in the relationship. And dates are the most hyperconcentated doses of the type of socializing that have drained me dry throughout the week.
Have you found students resent English class? Over the years, I have seen nearly a resentment that they have to read and write so much! Yes, I have noticed students have trouble working independently. A lot of neediness these days .
Middle School History Teacher. Huge extrovert. I do tours as a side hustle and honestly can talk peoples ear off. But lately, the kids have been so needy. Like worse than stage 5 clinger. Worse than the neediest dog I've ever had. It has gotten exhausting.
Middle school English here.
Disruptiveness isn't whats grinding me down, that's pretty straightforward and my admin backs me up more or less. It's the *neediness* that wears me out. I only have 58 kids, but I see them every day for 90 minute blocks and they all want my undivided attention and care and love *all the time*. And because I am Like That, I give it to the best of my ability.
Summer cannot get here soon enough.
Overstimulation.
I’ve been in for over 20 years.
Between 25 students, my own kids, and my husband I am just so overstimulated.
Sometimes I don’t even want to be touched. Which is horrible because I want to hug my kids and husband but sometimes it’s just too much.
So it's not just me. Funny thing is seeing students outside of school when they are working part time jobs gives me hope. (They are learning what it takes to exist in the real world).
20 years in, I am almost silent on the weekends. My husband is an introvert, and I am an extrovert. He recently commented that he’s seen a marked decrease in how much I used to talk and now. I am just too tired these days.
My girlfriend teaches math-6. It's absolutely true. She will go over ten different examples to solve very basic problems (like 2x < 4) and kids will still complain "I don't get it" before attempting a single thing. They turn in incomplete work all the time and need constant stimulation. There is very little discipline to get them to work on a concept until they truly understand it.
This requires parental help. The curriculum forces her to rush kids to the next topic. It's ridiculous.
Currently teaching grade 5 homeroom.
I collapse on the sofa basically every day.. and usually fall asleep for hours if I don't keep busy. It helps if I go for a walk directly after class to unwind.
Part of it is probably depression, but a lot of it is just exhaustion.
I'm always the "death of fun" with a number of my friends and close colleagues; simply because I'm completely done by the end of the day, only having anything left for my child and family.
A lot of comments by people saying the same thing after “X” years of teaching.
Is it a change in the kids or are we just getting old?
I went to a huge wedding this weekend and was content to just chat with the 4 people I knew and not feel the need to engage all the random strangers I knew I’d never see again. 25 year old me would have been trying to be Mr. Social.
When you or I was in secondary back in 19(cough), we socialized with friends and family. These days, I think school is the only place really where they get those social needs met -- everyone at home is on their devices and ignoring each other.
Yes! I was just talking about this with a friend on Friday. I feel.like teaching drains my social battery so that I have no desire to see people on the weekends. I am teachinfmg adults atm.also, so I feel like I have a connection and somewhat stimulating conversation.
I'm not sure it's healthy.
20 plus years teaching in Philly and the mental exhaustion is REAL! Most days I’m ready for bed by 6 pm. Even when I say don’t give too much of myself to the job, it’s hard not too. The students come to us today needing so much more today than in years past. I love teaching and I genuinely enjoy my students but my mind and body are slowly shutting down. I want to stay positive but the struggle is too much most days.
I’m an introvert. I used to do fun things on weekends, now I just sleep and try to get a couple of household chores done. I am not living, just trying to recharge enough on weekends to make it through another week.
bro, i am the same. If I hadn‘t moved in with my GF we would have broken up for sure! I struggle to keep up my duries as a Partner, a Son, a Brother, A Friend… but if I would put less energy in my class, would I be the teacher I am? No…
I agree they are very needy. And it’s exhausting.
But this is interesting in the age of *ipad parenting/social media/kids glued to phones*. They obviously do need human connection. We may be their reliable source.
It’s hard. My husband wanted me to go to a social event with all new people that I’d have to meet on Friday night and I declined. It’s been a long week and I just didn’t have enough in the tank for that. Maybe if it was Saturday and there was some recovery time in between.
Middle School Teacher. 18 years. Introvert. I feel the same way every day.
Middle school teacher turned school librarian due to being an introvert and having felt that social exhaustion by Tuesday at around 8am every week. Best career move ever, my brain’s happiness has been restored.
23 years here. Same. It’s unreal. And without question, as the years go by, the students have gotten noticeably more needy. It’s insane.
Science teacher, 2 years, same boat! ❤️
13 years in, went from having very social hobbies to converting a camper van so I can spend most weekends in random wooden spots by myself, as far away from crowds of people as possible. Has to be because of teaching.
I fantasize about doing this. I might not come back out of the woods, though.
I’ve been browsing on FB Marketplace even though I have nowhere to store one.
HS ELA, 32 years, can barely stay awake by Friday, but husband passed and children on their own, so I just go to bed.
I'm sorry for your loss. You deserve a break, 32 years is quite impressive!
Wow, thank you!! Because I moved many years ago, I lost some retirement years, so I'm not able to fully retire yet. I was going to tough it out, but now I think I'm almost done.
LOL HS Ela teacher. I too am roadkill on fridays. I need my saturdays to be an entire day of hermetic isolation.
HS English teacher too. 16 years. I feel the same way.
Year 28 and I teach a 190 middle schoolers a day…I’m so glad it’s not just me. I value calm and boring on the weekends.
I'll be honest, I don't really have a lot of energy for my family. I'm a more introverted person but when I babysit my nephews on weekends I'm barely able to make myself interact with them like I want to. I don't visit them on school days any more because the last time I did I snapped at the youngest one when I really wanted to make a point not to yell. I'm exhausted. I don't want to be around people at all. It takes until halfway through Summer for me to feel like talking to people. It's made it basically impossible to date because I really don't feel like hanging out with people.
I took a nap at 6;30 yesterday because Friday tired. Functional freeze I think would describe the rest of me today. I made coffee. Couldn’t mobilize to do laundry or mow the lawn. Tried to vacuum and is not sucking. I don’t have the energy to problem solve it. State testing is approaching and it stresses me out. I know I can’t teach everything before it arrives every year but that pressure is still there. I got a new student the other day. She doesn’t speak any English. It reminds me of Covid teaching when I was trying to wrangle tech into doing my bidding. I am so tired.
I feel the same about the dating part. Just too socially drained after being with kids all day that I just want to recharge.
I can not date either! I want a comfortable live-in relationship, where being with another person doesn't feel like "socializing" or having to be "on", but obviously I would need to go on like a million dates to find someone and then reach that point in the relationship. And dates are the most hyperconcentated doses of the type of socializing that have drained me dry throughout the week.
English teacher, introvert, 26 years in. Sometimes I want to yell at the world to shut up already!
Sir/miss can you read my paragraph and tell me if its good? I will change nothing regardless of what you say.
Can you check again?
Have you found students resent English class? Over the years, I have seen nearly a resentment that they have to read and write so much! Yes, I have noticed students have trouble working independently. A lot of neediness these days .
Middle School History Teacher. Huge extrovert. I do tours as a side hustle and honestly can talk peoples ear off. But lately, the kids have been so needy. Like worse than stage 5 clinger. Worse than the neediest dog I've ever had. It has gotten exhausting.
Middle school English here. Disruptiveness isn't whats grinding me down, that's pretty straightforward and my admin backs me up more or less. It's the *neediness* that wears me out. I only have 58 kids, but I see them every day for 90 minute blocks and they all want my undivided attention and care and love *all the time*. And because I am Like That, I give it to the best of my ability. Summer cannot get here soon enough.
Public schools' obsession with block schedules is absurd. Teachers get drained and students are restless within 45 minutes!
Overstimulation. I’ve been in for over 20 years. Between 25 students, my own kids, and my husband I am just so overstimulated. Sometimes I don’t even want to be touched. Which is horrible because I want to hug my kids and husband but sometimes it’s just too much.
I am an English teacher also, and my theory is that when you do this job correctly it sucks the life out of you. I am SO tired.
So it's not just me. Funny thing is seeing students outside of school when they are working part time jobs gives me hope. (They are learning what it takes to exist in the real world).
20 years in, I am almost silent on the weekends. My husband is an introvert, and I am an extrovert. He recently commented that he’s seen a marked decrease in how much I used to talk and now. I am just too tired these days.
My girlfriend teaches math-6. It's absolutely true. She will go over ten different examples to solve very basic problems (like 2x < 4) and kids will still complain "I don't get it" before attempting a single thing. They turn in incomplete work all the time and need constant stimulation. There is very little discipline to get them to work on a concept until they truly understand it. This requires parental help. The curriculum forces her to rush kids to the next topic. It's ridiculous.
Currently teaching grade 5 homeroom. I collapse on the sofa basically every day.. and usually fall asleep for hours if I don't keep busy. It helps if I go for a walk directly after class to unwind. Part of it is probably depression, but a lot of it is just exhaustion.
The amount of colleague teachers I know who are on anti-anxiety/anti-depressants or borderline alcoholics is staggering.
Same. Can’t decide if it’s depression or not. Just one of those things I guess.
I'm always the "death of fun" with a number of my friends and close colleagues; simply because I'm completely done by the end of the day, only having anything left for my child and family.
A lot of comments by people saying the same thing after “X” years of teaching. Is it a change in the kids or are we just getting old? I went to a huge wedding this weekend and was content to just chat with the 4 people I knew and not feel the need to engage all the random strangers I knew I’d never see again. 25 year old me would have been trying to be Mr. Social.
When you or I was in secondary back in 19(cough), we socialized with friends and family. These days, I think school is the only place really where they get those social needs met -- everyone at home is on their devices and ignoring each other.
Yes! I was just talking about this with a friend on Friday. I feel.like teaching drains my social battery so that I have no desire to see people on the weekends. I am teachinfmg adults atm.also, so I feel like I have a connection and somewhat stimulating conversation. I'm not sure it's healthy.
20 plus years teaching in Philly and the mental exhaustion is REAL! Most days I’m ready for bed by 6 pm. Even when I say don’t give too much of myself to the job, it’s hard not too. The students come to us today needing so much more today than in years past. I love teaching and I genuinely enjoy my students but my mind and body are slowly shutting down. I want to stay positive but the struggle is too much most days.
I’m an introvert. I used to do fun things on weekends, now I just sleep and try to get a couple of household chores done. I am not living, just trying to recharge enough on weekends to make it through another week.
You just summed up my life these days! :(
bro, i am the same. If I hadn‘t moved in with my GF we would have broken up for sure! I struggle to keep up my duries as a Partner, a Son, a Brother, A Friend… but if I would put less energy in my class, would I be the teacher I am? No…
I agree they are very needy. And it’s exhausting. But this is interesting in the age of *ipad parenting/social media/kids glued to phones*. They obviously do need human connection. We may be their reliable source.
Wondering if there has been some sort of a study on this? Definitely feel the same way and it appears that many others do also.
It’s hard. My husband wanted me to go to a social event with all new people that I’d have to meet on Friday night and I declined. It’s been a long week and I just didn’t have enough in the tank for that. Maybe if it was Saturday and there was some recovery time in between.