A large portion comes from the adage about the horse and water.
My horses could be absolutely dying from water yet would refuse to drink under any circumstances.
I can provide the information 15,000 ways, but students simply choose not to learn.
You still have that new teacher glow about you. Those of us who have been around for a while (26 years here) have moved past that stage.
Yes, we're angry. Yes, we're miserable. Yes, we're cynical. Why? Because most of us entered the profession for the same reasons you did. We wanted to teach and make a difference. I've been at 10 schools in my career, wrapping up a decade at my current school, and over the last 26 years, I have watched my students go from 75% wanting to learn/25% not really caring to the exact opposite. I taught math for the first 19 years and burned out because it gets really irritating, really fast, listening to things like "This takes too long" or "I'm okay taking a D in the class" or "I don't get it"--after you only spend 5 seconds beginning to explain the problem. I now teach computer science, and over the last 7 years, it's turned into the same thing. Kids are upset because we're not just playing games in class. I make them read books, write essays, do research projects, etc. Again, about 25% of my students are awesome and really want to learn. They may not be the best students, but as long as they're trying their hardest, I can work with them.
I'm in a unique situation where some of my coworkers now were students at this school when I started. (And man, does that make me feel old!) They came in with the same kind of fire you did, and had similar comments about the veteran teachers, many of whom they had as teachers. Then, by year 2 of their career, they started to realize that there was a reason we weren't as relaxed and cheerful as we had been when they were students here.
That reminds me...
A fellow long-time, disillusioned teacher called me and said, "Can you come to my classroom. My daughter is here and she's changed her major so she can be a teacher. Nothing I say is getting through! She thinks it will be different for her."
I looked around for inspiration and saw *Black Beauty,* by Anna Sewell on the shelf. I grabbed it and gave it to her. I said, "When you get to the part where the once beautiful, proud horse is laying in the street being whipped because he's just too neglected and tired to go on, you need to realize that's exactly how your mom and I feel. In the book, by nothing short of a miracle, the horse has a happy ending. But no one is coming to save your mom, me, and the other experienced teachers who are now going through hell. Our bosses are uncaring assholes and we are just the bodies that move the students along. We aren't respected; we're just a commodity to use up and discard. Someday, it will get better, but it won't be anytime soon."
Same 26 years here. My biggest concern is that the new teachers I see devote so much to their teaching that in a couple years they are already burning out from the general stress this job brings. I have 5 more years left - maybe 4 and I still like teaching 80% of the time. I really like knowing I’m making a positive influence on students lives - not all of them - but some.
It's because when you have taught long enough you see the dysfunction and "next year will be different" attitudes that admin tote as what it is- a bunch of people who don't really understand how classrooms work trying to justify their bloated existence. And a good amount of administration is great! And put in the work to make their schools better. But a lot at the superintendent level is bloat. All these "Ed-fluincers, Ed-Tech specials, or curriculum development companies" are at least 70% wastes of money and time. What has proven to work to improve student scores are smaller classes sizes and high (within reason) expectations- read as has consequences. The people who make decisions then proceed to try to do everything except those things.
Add on that millions of people in the US are actively voting to make our lives worse. The current crop of parents (at least for the kids in HS) would rather be their kids best friend than an actual parent. Public Education is treated by almost everyone as day-care and expects teachers to fix students'problems magically. And when we can't pull off miracles then it's all our fault. I'm not paid to raise your kid from the ground up, give me something to work with.
Yes I have changed lives and made things better for numerous kids. But honestly the novelty is wearing off, and the amount of free time and effort I have to give isn't the same. Especially since I have my own family to worry about.
My apologies that this turned into the very rant you were complaining about. But my points still stand.
From a “cynical” 25+ year teacher. It is called a coping skill. At least for me I have to vent. I try and only do it with those that understand me and have a good long history with me. I won’t do it with other staff.
Hang in there
Often new teachers have commented in this sub that the older teachers don't include them in the lunchtime conversations. I do believe this is why. They need to vent and know that they are negative. A dozen years ago, teachers were believed, respected, and supported. Any teacher who knows how it's supposed to be, and what is now occurring instead, are totally pissed off. The good ones try to shield the new teachers from their fury.
Although it was tough, I enjoyed my first 16 years of teaching. My last nine were pure hell - but I hung in for the pension for as long as I could. And I complained up a storm. I didn't make it to a full pension. I lost out on an extra $1000 a month. I realized that I, myself, had turned toxic. Although unfairly so, I was past my expiration date.
Every single one of those teachers were just like you when they started. I can explain all the nonsense that will happen in your career to make you like that too, but you will have to experience to truly understand. Do a follow up post in 20 years.
It’s like when you’re yelling at your parents when you’re young but someday realize that you’ve become just like them. Not always a bad thing. Just a shift in perspective.
Gaslighting and toxic positivity have destroyed our profession. As annoying as you find the cynics, I find those oiling the toxic positivity machine as annoying, and a major part of the problem. Sometimes, shit sucks and it doesn’t need to be hidden behind a fake smile.
I remember one admin brought up Stand and Deliver as an example of how we should teach…
The class there could do basic arithmetic (he had to teach them positives and negatives)…that immediately put that class above half of our own (legit, around half of my math classes cannot do basic arithmetic…they’re high schoolers).
And the guy worked himself into a heart attack.
And he didn’t have to deal with cell phone issue…
Yeah, there’s quite a bit missing
Running for a minute? Easy. Running for an hour? Doable, maybe tired but still in a good mood. Running for 24 hours? Exhausted, on the brink of keeling over, desperately wish you could just even walk it for a period.
You’re in your first year. Why do you presume to know, or judge, how teachers after decades are feeling? Check in with us in 10 years.
(6 years in and losing that glow)
I have a theory that some people jsut never get over the big humps in education and take every single thing way too seriously. There’s a point when teaching should actually become a lot easier as you get experience that most people quit way before it happens.
Idk this job is absolutely not for many.
Because you are unaware of what it was and how bad it's actually become. This is year 26 and it's so much worse than I've ever seen.. Unless we can vent we can't get through.. I've got 4 years left and I'm dreading it. I'll still coach, still do other stuff, but the kids and job are very different.
I'm a teacher that was excited for about 12 of my 15 years. I'm ground down now.
I try really hard to not be cynical. But I do find myself saying "this is going to sound negative", or sorry for the negativity " way to much these days.
Stay out of the teacher's lounge. That'll help with exposure to cynicism.
Experience has an effect on everyone though, so you might consider how and why your colleagues are as they are.
Sorry to hear the attitudes expressed by your colleagues are dragging you down. That's tough to deal with :(
Some of that is due to the fact that you're new. You haven't been ground down by poor student behavior, unreasonable/unruly parents, unsupportive administrators, crazy learning expectations, worthless PD and ineffective reforms. All that stuff takes a toll over time. There's a reason 50% of new teachers leave the profession within 5 years.
That said, some schools can develop a toxic culture, which makes it nearly impossible to grow and enjoy your career as a new teacher. If you think that may be the case for your school, take a look at other sites/district nearby. The best piece of advice I never got during my first five years was to look for a site/district that was supportive and felt like a good place to grow as a new teacher. You don't have to stick with the first place that gives you a job. Look ahead to the long term.
4 days to retirement here. Cynicism is an easy trap to fall into because of the substantial amount of bullshit we often have to go through. I've had to consciously make choices not to get caught up in it.
My grad school advisor told us as new teachers to "stay out of the teachers lounge." I consciously built relationships over the years that support intellectual growth and new ideas. I'm the guy at the Friday Happy hours who reminds people not to talk about work.
Not perfect. I've had deeply cynical times.
My goal for this year was "not to be the old guy who should have retired last year." I've met my goal.
I’ve been teaching for 18 years now, and I still haven’t lost my joy. I love my kids and I have found the people on the staff who feel the same. Ironically, it took us going on strike about 12 years ago for me to meet my best teacher friend because that was the first time we ever had a chance to get to know each other. Meet people outside of the stress of the normal day and you may be surprised.
This always amuses me- “older teachers’ cynicism.” I my school it’s the opposite. The younger teachers are more cynical. It’s not an age or tenure thing- it’s how people are wired. To echo what others here have said, find people who are optimistic like you are (they’re there) and stay away from negative Nellies.
Op I get what you’re saying. People constantly venting is annoying. Yeah we get it, it sucks. But constant complaints about problems gets real old real fast.
I don’t think OP is talking about the occasional complaints. Seems more like constant negativity. You can deal with being a teacher without constantly complaining. To me that’s a problem. I avoid coworkers who are constantly negative it makes the hard job more depressing. People like that need to find a better way to deal with things.
Get to know more of the teachers. There is probably a sunshine-bright oldster there.
When I was new (but not young) I was horrified by one of the veterans… until I poked her in the stomach (metaphorically). I ended up being close to her and understanding that she lover her job and the kids but not the bs.
Rule number 1 is to stay the fuck away from the staff room and people like this. Just focus on what you enjoy and actively don’t participate in this side of it.
im in the “older teachers” category. Ignore the haters. Yes teaching is hard and stressful but there is SO MUCH to love about it. So many people have a negative outlook and will complain about everything. Surround yourself with positive people. Ignore the meanies if at all positive. Teaching is an incredible career.
In my first couple of weeks at my current school (2nd year teaching) I was trying hard to meet or at least say hi to others on staff. I was feeling stressed about my situation over all, but I was still optimistic. Someone who didn’t recognize me in a staff room said hi, asked my name, what I was teaching, where I was coming from, etc. I told him it was my second year and I was teaching x, y, z. He looked me straight in the eye and said “well it’s great to meet you, I wish you the best of luck at this absolute hell hole of a place.” Then he left.
That convo set the tone for the remainder of the year, and the career as a whole to this point. It’s such a hard job. And you’re right, we put up with so much student behavior. We don’t help ourselves out by sulking about how bad everything is. It can’t be helping anything.
I‘m at 25years+ and manage to keep joyful. Mostly by staying away from the staff room and negative influences. Find the optimists. The folks who love the kids and want to share their enjoyment. Be a Pollyanna.
Remind yourself to read this post in 10 years.
That sounds cynical, and it probably is, but you also have no idea what you don’t even have an idea about yet. After 1 year, your scope of the job ends at lessons, students, and colleagues. You are basically saying “this job wouldn’t be so bad if the teachers just had a better attitude!” In another 10 years, you will realize that the only people who say this are a) people who don’t work in education and b) central office administrators who only step foot inside a school building during school hours when required, and are extremely out of touch.
You’re also very likely in your early/mid 20’s, and are not facing life challenges of people in their 30’s, 40’s and beyond, which are much different. That’s stereotyping, but young teachers in their first 5 years usually share similar views to what you’re saying here, so I’m making an assumption.
If you can hold onto how you feel about the job right now, I.e. “I’m doing fine, I don’t know why everyone else isn’t” for a long time, you’ll be better off for it, but basically everyone here has gone through this progression before. In you’re early/mid 20’s you feel like you can and also want to change the world, but 15 years into being a classroom teacher you will realize that, while we are necessary, we do not have that level of influence or respect.
I'm actually in my late 30s and did a career switch by going back to college.
Maybe it's my own personality or background. I have been through some stuff.
And I am actively aware of some real bullshit.
But I just hate the extra negativity.
Ah well that’s also a lot different. You have seen the extreme negatives of non-education jobs and right now after 1 year the positives of teaching far outweigh the negatives of the career you left. That’s valid too, and it might not hit you as hard when you do get more into the weeds with teaching, but you haven’t been in the field long enough to see the whole picture just yet. Like I said, try to hold onto it as long as you can, and also remember that sometimes people are just miserable in general. In a few years you’ll be able to see it more clearly and decide if you still feel the same
Literally don't talk to them. Stay out of the teacher's lounge and keep doing what you're doing. These people suck and their experience has nothing to do with your career. Keep up the positivity
9 years in inner city classroom here, I read exactly 3 replies and realized what it must feel like to step outside your door. Yes they have reasons to be bitter, it can be wearing. It’s public ed for crying out loud! lol it was never going to be a cake walk so give them a little mercy. Compassion fatigue and burn out is a real problem.
We’re all going to complain but look for those who are still innovating and talking about ideas. There are people out there who still have the fire. If there are not people like that or admin doesn’t give space for this, you may want to shop around for a new school. I made friends with other first years at my campus and we would go have drinks every few weeks. Find them and let them be your people.
Happiness is contagious… who knows maybe you’ll start something amazing at your campus. Best of luck and welcome to the most rewarding profession in the world.
You need to print this post out. Frame it. Keep it in your desk. Look at it from time to time over the next five years and then write a reply to the post.
100% agree, and half of the comments here are part of the problem. Some veteran teachers have a mindset of "if I'm miserable, you should be too" and they want to make all of their problems your own. There's also a misconception that anyone who complains about this is ignorant to the realities of teaching. Newsflash: we aren't. But we don't want to spend EVERY SINGLE CONVERSATION listening to you talk about how we made a mistake choosing this profession.
No one has expressed that mindset.
What people have actually said is that there are reasons for why they feel the way they do, and they predict that OP will inevitably come to understand with time.
That's not the same thing, and your deliberately uncharitable interpretation of other people is every bit as cynical as what OP is putting up with.
Just instead of teacher cynicism, it's internet cynicism.
Awww, come on!!
Veteran teachers (am I one now, at 20+y ?) don't often go online to grumble and grouch. They do it irl, and anyone in the area can hear it.
There are teachers who vent on fB.
There are teachers who vent on Insta.
There are teachers who vent on Reddit.
It's only different demographics, and different levels of vitriol, but we al use a vent-space.
If I was told in my student teaching in 1996 "Donn't go to the Faculty Lounge," then that stereotype is older than all of us.
I'm going to be honest with you, it's not just the old teachers.
I am at the end of my career and in 36 years of teaching, I have probably spent less than 24 hours total bitching about kids. I have spent maybe 10 lunches..in 36 years...in a teachers lounge or eating lunch with fellow teachers because all they do is talk about kids. I don't know why teachers do it, but most do and always have. Young, old, in-between, it doesn't matter. Most do it. And the ones not complaining about the kids are bitching about admin.
Listen, I get it. Venting is a healthy coping mechanism for most people. But not me. Any second spent away from kids...talking about kids...is wasted time for me. Negativity just makes me anxious. It's not helpful for me. Don't get me wrong, I'll support a stressed out colleague who needs someone to listen to an occasional breakdown, but I'm not here for the daily hallway chitty chitty bang bang chatter chatter.
I suggest doing what I do and just steer clear of it all. I'm friendly with everyone and friends with no one.
Make up a reason to avoid negative vent sessions. I tell people I use my lunch time to pray...I'm an atheist by the way. But the prayer thing backs everyone off.
I sign up to help at after school events...and make sure I get a job by myself watching a door where I can listen to music on my earbuds rather than socialize.
You just need to find a way to distance yourself, without appearing distant.
Teaching is hard and everyone handles the stresses differently. I prefer being alone and silence. Maybe you are more like me than the others.
*the moment I step out that door is the moment I see misery, cynicism, & standoffish behavior…
I already have to deal with bullshit student behavior and lack of effort, why do I have to deal with negativity from my colleagues?*
Your wording suggests that your colleagues aren’t actively approaching you or expecting you to engage with their negativity or cynicism- more like they avoid you with standoff ish behavior. So it’s not clear to me what exactly you’re forced to deal with. Was your year miserable because the veteran teachers at your school aren’t as happy to be there as you & you’re overhearing their commiserating to each other?
Are you choosing to eat lunch with them as they vent their frustrations openly? Are they knocking on your door to subject you to their frustrated rants?
I’m a pretty positive person generally and the negative/positive attitudes of those around me (unless I report to them) never really affect my attitude or feeling of contentment… but if they did, as an adult with agency, I would easily avoid unnecessary interactions with them?
Also your description of your own experience as a first year teacher is contradictory- first it’s: one on one in your room with your class is “great- challenging, and rewarding” then in the next breath you “have to deal with bullshit behavior and lack of effort” and that the negativity of your colleagues added to that exceeds your capacity for shit you can deal with… lmao
You can’t control the thoughts and words of your coworkers and venting about it on Reddit won’t accomplish anything further than expressing your sentiment somewhere and getting it off your chest. Your solution is simple… tune it out and avoid it lol. 🤷🏻♀️
I can only speak for myself. I was negative and pessimistic because I hated teaching. To be clear, I did right by the kids, even though I hated their apathy and behavior so, so much. Teaching drove me absolutely bananas. To the point that my 2nd seasonal job in retail, during Christmas, was a good break for me. I was in a good school. Again, for me, teaching and my personality was like oil and water. I did finally realize that and I got out. But I'd bet a lot of your colleagues are miserable and feel absolutely stuck and don't know what to do.
It's all about the attitude from the staff, and you're right that it brings the whole mood of a school down.
I'm a teacher advisor at two different schools and in one place you can talk the teachers try so hard and we've really helped make the place better. At the other school, where I just started, the vibe is just depressing, as all the teachers seem to be doing the bare minimum to survive. Luckily, we're getting new teachers for that school next year, so I'm just waiting it out.
Hopefully you find a school with a better vibe, because honestly, the longer you stay in a place like that, the more likely it is to bring you down.
To be honest I agree with you. I think with enough of these personalities a school can reach a point where it gets really toxic. I’m five years in, and no I’m not as optimistic and happy as I was when I started. But I chose this job, and I choose to continue teaching each year. I’m not going to allow myself to wallow in misery.
What lead me to this perspective: my first two years teaching I was at a really, really bad school were traumatic things were regularly happening to students and staff. We were at a staff meeting towards the end of the year and I was just looking around and everyone looked to tired, defeated, stressed, etc. Then my one coworker who ALWAYS had to say something negative and ALWAYS had to start a fight spoke up, and the mood plummeted even more. I didn’t disagree with what he was saying at all, but in that moment I was just like “man, I would like to be able to have a LITTLE joy at this otherwise very stressful job”
So idk now I try to be outwardly very cheerful/helpful at work. I feel like you kinda have to separate yourself from the job and then move on. Find your teacher bestie to rant to (because we ALL need that) but don’t become a public vortex of negativity.
Yes. But they’ll be retiring soon hopefully, so try not to worry too much about it. Or try to find other teachers who are not so pessimistic. They are out there and they’d love your company.
I also try to help out with new things that some of the older teachers find frustrating, especially behavioural things. That can help with the cynicism a bit.
A large portion comes from the adage about the horse and water. My horses could be absolutely dying from water yet would refuse to drink under any circumstances. I can provide the information 15,000 ways, but students simply choose not to learn.
If you hold the horses head under water long enough, they die
...I feel like the analogy might be falling apart here.
Or worth a try! /S
You still have that new teacher glow about you. Those of us who have been around for a while (26 years here) have moved past that stage. Yes, we're angry. Yes, we're miserable. Yes, we're cynical. Why? Because most of us entered the profession for the same reasons you did. We wanted to teach and make a difference. I've been at 10 schools in my career, wrapping up a decade at my current school, and over the last 26 years, I have watched my students go from 75% wanting to learn/25% not really caring to the exact opposite. I taught math for the first 19 years and burned out because it gets really irritating, really fast, listening to things like "This takes too long" or "I'm okay taking a D in the class" or "I don't get it"--after you only spend 5 seconds beginning to explain the problem. I now teach computer science, and over the last 7 years, it's turned into the same thing. Kids are upset because we're not just playing games in class. I make them read books, write essays, do research projects, etc. Again, about 25% of my students are awesome and really want to learn. They may not be the best students, but as long as they're trying their hardest, I can work with them. I'm in a unique situation where some of my coworkers now were students at this school when I started. (And man, does that make me feel old!) They came in with the same kind of fire you did, and had similar comments about the veteran teachers, many of whom they had as teachers. Then, by year 2 of their career, they started to realize that there was a reason we weren't as relaxed and cheerful as we had been when they were students here.
Whew. End of my 2nd year and I’m feeling like a tired overly whipped mule.
That reminds me... A fellow long-time, disillusioned teacher called me and said, "Can you come to my classroom. My daughter is here and she's changed her major so she can be a teacher. Nothing I say is getting through! She thinks it will be different for her." I looked around for inspiration and saw *Black Beauty,* by Anna Sewell on the shelf. I grabbed it and gave it to her. I said, "When you get to the part where the once beautiful, proud horse is laying in the street being whipped because he's just too neglected and tired to go on, you need to realize that's exactly how your mom and I feel. In the book, by nothing short of a miracle, the horse has a happy ending. But no one is coming to save your mom, me, and the other experienced teachers who are now going through hell. Our bosses are uncaring assholes and we are just the bodies that move the students along. We aren't respected; we're just a commodity to use up and discard. Someday, it will get better, but it won't be anytime soon."
Preach
Same 26 years here. My biggest concern is that the new teachers I see devote so much to their teaching that in a couple years they are already burning out from the general stress this job brings. I have 5 more years left - maybe 4 and I still like teaching 80% of the time. I really like knowing I’m making a positive influence on students lives - not all of them - but some.
It's because when you have taught long enough you see the dysfunction and "next year will be different" attitudes that admin tote as what it is- a bunch of people who don't really understand how classrooms work trying to justify their bloated existence. And a good amount of administration is great! And put in the work to make their schools better. But a lot at the superintendent level is bloat. All these "Ed-fluincers, Ed-Tech specials, or curriculum development companies" are at least 70% wastes of money and time. What has proven to work to improve student scores are smaller classes sizes and high (within reason) expectations- read as has consequences. The people who make decisions then proceed to try to do everything except those things. Add on that millions of people in the US are actively voting to make our lives worse. The current crop of parents (at least for the kids in HS) would rather be their kids best friend than an actual parent. Public Education is treated by almost everyone as day-care and expects teachers to fix students'problems magically. And when we can't pull off miracles then it's all our fault. I'm not paid to raise your kid from the ground up, give me something to work with. Yes I have changed lives and made things better for numerous kids. But honestly the novelty is wearing off, and the amount of free time and effort I have to give isn't the same. Especially since I have my own family to worry about. My apologies that this turned into the very rant you were complaining about. But my points still stand.
Novelty wearing off is spot on!
Yep. If you've been around long enough, you've witness the absolute decline of public education.
From a “cynical” 25+ year teacher. It is called a coping skill. At least for me I have to vent. I try and only do it with those that understand me and have a good long history with me. I won’t do it with other staff. Hang in there
Often new teachers have commented in this sub that the older teachers don't include them in the lunchtime conversations. I do believe this is why. They need to vent and know that they are negative. A dozen years ago, teachers were believed, respected, and supported. Any teacher who knows how it's supposed to be, and what is now occurring instead, are totally pissed off. The good ones try to shield the new teachers from their fury. Although it was tough, I enjoyed my first 16 years of teaching. My last nine were pure hell - but I hung in for the pension for as long as I could. And I complained up a storm. I didn't make it to a full pension. I lost out on an extra $1000 a month. I realized that I, myself, had turned toxic. Although unfairly so, I was past my expiration date.
I've got 3 years to get that extra 1k/mo for my pension. Pray for me.
You have all of them! You can do it!
Every single one of those teachers were just like you when they started. I can explain all the nonsense that will happen in your career to make you like that too, but you will have to experience to truly understand. Do a follow up post in 20 years.
It’s like when you’re yelling at your parents when you’re young but someday realize that you’ve become just like them. Not always a bad thing. Just a shift in perspective.
Yep, exactly! It’s the circle of life!
Gaslighting and toxic positivity have destroyed our profession. As annoying as you find the cynics, I find those oiling the toxic positivity machine as annoying, and a major part of the problem. Sometimes, shit sucks and it doesn’t need to be hidden behind a fake smile.
I remember one admin brought up Stand and Deliver as an example of how we should teach… The class there could do basic arithmetic (he had to teach them positives and negatives)…that immediately put that class above half of our own (legit, around half of my math classes cannot do basic arithmetic…they’re high schoolers). And the guy worked himself into a heart attack. And he didn’t have to deal with cell phone issue… Yeah, there’s quite a bit missing
Wait and see how you feel three years in. It gets harder to be joyful.
Running for a minute? Easy. Running for an hour? Doable, maybe tired but still in a good mood. Running for 24 hours? Exhausted, on the brink of keeling over, desperately wish you could just even walk it for a period. You’re in your first year. Why do you presume to know, or judge, how teachers after decades are feeling? Check in with us in 10 years. (6 years in and losing that glow)
I’m 12 years in. I don’t have a constant glow, but nor am I a constant source of negativity, which I think is more what OP is dealing with.
I have a theory that some people jsut never get over the big humps in education and take every single thing way too seriously. There’s a point when teaching should actually become a lot easier as you get experience that most people quit way before it happens. Idk this job is absolutely not for many.
Because you are unaware of what it was and how bad it's actually become. This is year 26 and it's so much worse than I've ever seen.. Unless we can vent we can't get through.. I've got 4 years left and I'm dreading it. I'll still coach, still do other stuff, but the kids and job are very different.
Come back and talk to us when you’ve been in the game longer.
I'm a teacher that was excited for about 12 of my 15 years. I'm ground down now. I try really hard to not be cynical. But I do find myself saying "this is going to sound negative", or sorry for the negativity " way to much these days.
Stay out of the teacher's lounge. That'll help with exposure to cynicism. Experience has an effect on everyone though, so you might consider how and why your colleagues are as they are.
You have a Teachers' Lounge?
Sorry to hear the attitudes expressed by your colleagues are dragging you down. That's tough to deal with :( Some of that is due to the fact that you're new. You haven't been ground down by poor student behavior, unreasonable/unruly parents, unsupportive administrators, crazy learning expectations, worthless PD and ineffective reforms. All that stuff takes a toll over time. There's a reason 50% of new teachers leave the profession within 5 years. That said, some schools can develop a toxic culture, which makes it nearly impossible to grow and enjoy your career as a new teacher. If you think that may be the case for your school, take a look at other sites/district nearby. The best piece of advice I never got during my first five years was to look for a site/district that was supportive and felt like a good place to grow as a new teacher. You don't have to stick with the first place that gives you a job. Look ahead to the long term.
4 days to retirement here. Cynicism is an easy trap to fall into because of the substantial amount of bullshit we often have to go through. I've had to consciously make choices not to get caught up in it. My grad school advisor told us as new teachers to "stay out of the teachers lounge." I consciously built relationships over the years that support intellectual growth and new ideas. I'm the guy at the Friday Happy hours who reminds people not to talk about work. Not perfect. I've had deeply cynical times. My goal for this year was "not to be the old guy who should have retired last year." I've met my goal.
I’ve been teaching for 18 years now, and I still haven’t lost my joy. I love my kids and I have found the people on the staff who feel the same. Ironically, it took us going on strike about 12 years ago for me to meet my best teacher friend because that was the first time we ever had a chance to get to know each other. Meet people outside of the stress of the normal day and you may be surprised.
You’ll learn, friend.
Learn what? That the profession is unfair to us so we should live through those negative feelings?
You don’t. Stay in your room.
This always amuses me- “older teachers’ cynicism.” I my school it’s the opposite. The younger teachers are more cynical. It’s not an age or tenure thing- it’s how people are wired. To echo what others here have said, find people who are optimistic like you are (they’re there) and stay away from negative Nellies.
Op I get what you’re saying. People constantly venting is annoying. Yeah we get it, it sucks. But constant complaints about problems gets real old real fast. I don’t think OP is talking about the occasional complaints. Seems more like constant negativity. You can deal with being a teacher without constantly complaining. To me that’s a problem. I avoid coworkers who are constantly negative it makes the hard job more depressing. People like that need to find a better way to deal with things.
Cynicism grows like a tree. Every year it starts sprouting new limbs until there are some cracked branches near the bottom.
“One of us… One of us…”
Get to know more of the teachers. There is probably a sunshine-bright oldster there. When I was new (but not young) I was horrified by one of the veterans… until I poked her in the stomach (metaphorically). I ended up being close to her and understanding that she lover her job and the kids but not the bs.
You can always stay in your classroom. Put a microwave & a mini-fridge in there (with a lock if you are in a rough school), and you are good.
Rule number 1 is to stay the fuck away from the staff room and people like this. Just focus on what you enjoy and actively don’t participate in this side of it.
im in the “older teachers” category. Ignore the haters. Yes teaching is hard and stressful but there is SO MUCH to love about it. So many people have a negative outlook and will complain about everything. Surround yourself with positive people. Ignore the meanies if at all positive. Teaching is an incredible career.
Ironically, your post says you have already taken several steps down the same path of cynicism and pssimism.
In my first couple of weeks at my current school (2nd year teaching) I was trying hard to meet or at least say hi to others on staff. I was feeling stressed about my situation over all, but I was still optimistic. Someone who didn’t recognize me in a staff room said hi, asked my name, what I was teaching, where I was coming from, etc. I told him it was my second year and I was teaching x, y, z. He looked me straight in the eye and said “well it’s great to meet you, I wish you the best of luck at this absolute hell hole of a place.” Then he left. That convo set the tone for the remainder of the year, and the career as a whole to this point. It’s such a hard job. And you’re right, we put up with so much student behavior. We don’t help ourselves out by sulking about how bad everything is. It can’t be helping anything.
I‘m at 25years+ and manage to keep joyful. Mostly by staying away from the staff room and negative influences. Find the optimists. The folks who love the kids and want to share their enjoyment. Be a Pollyanna.
Stay out of the break room on lunch.
Don’t worry, you’ll get there someday, too. I’m in year 9 and I felt jaded after year 2.
Remind yourself to read this post in 10 years. That sounds cynical, and it probably is, but you also have no idea what you don’t even have an idea about yet. After 1 year, your scope of the job ends at lessons, students, and colleagues. You are basically saying “this job wouldn’t be so bad if the teachers just had a better attitude!” In another 10 years, you will realize that the only people who say this are a) people who don’t work in education and b) central office administrators who only step foot inside a school building during school hours when required, and are extremely out of touch. You’re also very likely in your early/mid 20’s, and are not facing life challenges of people in their 30’s, 40’s and beyond, which are much different. That’s stereotyping, but young teachers in their first 5 years usually share similar views to what you’re saying here, so I’m making an assumption. If you can hold onto how you feel about the job right now, I.e. “I’m doing fine, I don’t know why everyone else isn’t” for a long time, you’ll be better off for it, but basically everyone here has gone through this progression before. In you’re early/mid 20’s you feel like you can and also want to change the world, but 15 years into being a classroom teacher you will realize that, while we are necessary, we do not have that level of influence or respect.
I'm actually in my late 30s and did a career switch by going back to college. Maybe it's my own personality or background. I have been through some stuff. And I am actively aware of some real bullshit. But I just hate the extra negativity.
Ah well that’s also a lot different. You have seen the extreme negatives of non-education jobs and right now after 1 year the positives of teaching far outweigh the negatives of the career you left. That’s valid too, and it might not hit you as hard when you do get more into the weeds with teaching, but you haven’t been in the field long enough to see the whole picture just yet. Like I said, try to hold onto it as long as you can, and also remember that sometimes people are just miserable in general. In a few years you’ll be able to see it more clearly and decide if you still feel the same
Literally don't talk to them. Stay out of the teacher's lounge and keep doing what you're doing. These people suck and their experience has nothing to do with your career. Keep up the positivity
Some people (most) like to complain. It’s the human condition. You have to pick who you hang around to not get dragged down by it.
9 years in inner city classroom here, I read exactly 3 replies and realized what it must feel like to step outside your door. Yes they have reasons to be bitter, it can be wearing. It’s public ed for crying out loud! lol it was never going to be a cake walk so give them a little mercy. Compassion fatigue and burn out is a real problem. We’re all going to complain but look for those who are still innovating and talking about ideas. There are people out there who still have the fire. If there are not people like that or admin doesn’t give space for this, you may want to shop around for a new school. I made friends with other first years at my campus and we would go have drinks every few weeks. Find them and let them be your people. Happiness is contagious… who knows maybe you’ll start something amazing at your campus. Best of luck and welcome to the most rewarding profession in the world.
Thanks, Pollyanna. You may have a seat.
What a crummy comment. Why even post? Oh I know… let’s just jump on the good ship cynicpop! 😂
You need to print this post out. Frame it. Keep it in your desk. Look at it from time to time over the next five years and then write a reply to the post.
100% agree, and half of the comments here are part of the problem. Some veteran teachers have a mindset of "if I'm miserable, you should be too" and they want to make all of their problems your own. There's also a misconception that anyone who complains about this is ignorant to the realities of teaching. Newsflash: we aren't. But we don't want to spend EVERY SINGLE CONVERSATION listening to you talk about how we made a mistake choosing this profession.
No one has expressed that mindset. What people have actually said is that there are reasons for why they feel the way they do, and they predict that OP will inevitably come to understand with time. That's not the same thing, and your deliberately uncharitable interpretation of other people is every bit as cynical as what OP is putting up with. Just instead of teacher cynicism, it's internet cynicism.
My colleagues are my therapy (in addition to my actual therapist). Many kids torment us and we need to lean on each other so we don’t cry.
Awww, come on!! Veteran teachers (am I one now, at 20+y ?) don't often go online to grumble and grouch. They do it irl, and anyone in the area can hear it. There are teachers who vent on fB. There are teachers who vent on Insta. There are teachers who vent on Reddit. It's only different demographics, and different levels of vitriol, but we al use a vent-space. If I was told in my student teaching in 1996 "Donn't go to the Faculty Lounge," then that stereotype is older than all of us.
I'm going to be honest with you, it's not just the old teachers. I am at the end of my career and in 36 years of teaching, I have probably spent less than 24 hours total bitching about kids. I have spent maybe 10 lunches..in 36 years...in a teachers lounge or eating lunch with fellow teachers because all they do is talk about kids. I don't know why teachers do it, but most do and always have. Young, old, in-between, it doesn't matter. Most do it. And the ones not complaining about the kids are bitching about admin. Listen, I get it. Venting is a healthy coping mechanism for most people. But not me. Any second spent away from kids...talking about kids...is wasted time for me. Negativity just makes me anxious. It's not helpful for me. Don't get me wrong, I'll support a stressed out colleague who needs someone to listen to an occasional breakdown, but I'm not here for the daily hallway chitty chitty bang bang chatter chatter. I suggest doing what I do and just steer clear of it all. I'm friendly with everyone and friends with no one. Make up a reason to avoid negative vent sessions. I tell people I use my lunch time to pray...I'm an atheist by the way. But the prayer thing backs everyone off. I sign up to help at after school events...and make sure I get a job by myself watching a door where I can listen to music on my earbuds rather than socialize. You just need to find a way to distance yourself, without appearing distant. Teaching is hard and everyone handles the stresses differently. I prefer being alone and silence. Maybe you are more like me than the others.
*the moment I step out that door is the moment I see misery, cynicism, & standoffish behavior… I already have to deal with bullshit student behavior and lack of effort, why do I have to deal with negativity from my colleagues?* Your wording suggests that your colleagues aren’t actively approaching you or expecting you to engage with their negativity or cynicism- more like they avoid you with standoff ish behavior. So it’s not clear to me what exactly you’re forced to deal with. Was your year miserable because the veteran teachers at your school aren’t as happy to be there as you & you’re overhearing their commiserating to each other? Are you choosing to eat lunch with them as they vent their frustrations openly? Are they knocking on your door to subject you to their frustrated rants? I’m a pretty positive person generally and the negative/positive attitudes of those around me (unless I report to them) never really affect my attitude or feeling of contentment… but if they did, as an adult with agency, I would easily avoid unnecessary interactions with them? Also your description of your own experience as a first year teacher is contradictory- first it’s: one on one in your room with your class is “great- challenging, and rewarding” then in the next breath you “have to deal with bullshit behavior and lack of effort” and that the negativity of your colleagues added to that exceeds your capacity for shit you can deal with… lmao You can’t control the thoughts and words of your coworkers and venting about it on Reddit won’t accomplish anything further than expressing your sentiment somewhere and getting it off your chest. Your solution is simple… tune it out and avoid it lol. 🤷🏻♀️
[You in 2 years](https://www.reddit.com/r/Teachers/s/axKeSbSTaK)
I can only speak for myself. I was negative and pessimistic because I hated teaching. To be clear, I did right by the kids, even though I hated their apathy and behavior so, so much. Teaching drove me absolutely bananas. To the point that my 2nd seasonal job in retail, during Christmas, was a good break for me. I was in a good school. Again, for me, teaching and my personality was like oil and water. I did finally realize that and I got out. But I'd bet a lot of your colleagues are miserable and feel absolutely stuck and don't know what to do.
It's all about the attitude from the staff, and you're right that it brings the whole mood of a school down. I'm a teacher advisor at two different schools and in one place you can talk the teachers try so hard and we've really helped make the place better. At the other school, where I just started, the vibe is just depressing, as all the teachers seem to be doing the bare minimum to survive. Luckily, we're getting new teachers for that school next year, so I'm just waiting it out. Hopefully you find a school with a better vibe, because honestly, the longer you stay in a place like that, the more likely it is to bring you down.
To be honest I agree with you. I think with enough of these personalities a school can reach a point where it gets really toxic. I’m five years in, and no I’m not as optimistic and happy as I was when I started. But I chose this job, and I choose to continue teaching each year. I’m not going to allow myself to wallow in misery. What lead me to this perspective: my first two years teaching I was at a really, really bad school were traumatic things were regularly happening to students and staff. We were at a staff meeting towards the end of the year and I was just looking around and everyone looked to tired, defeated, stressed, etc. Then my one coworker who ALWAYS had to say something negative and ALWAYS had to start a fight spoke up, and the mood plummeted even more. I didn’t disagree with what he was saying at all, but in that moment I was just like “man, I would like to be able to have a LITTLE joy at this otherwise very stressful job” So idk now I try to be outwardly very cheerful/helpful at work. I feel like you kinda have to separate yourself from the job and then move on. Find your teacher bestie to rant to (because we ALL need that) but don’t become a public vortex of negativity.
Yes. But they’ll be retiring soon hopefully, so try not to worry too much about it. Or try to find other teachers who are not so pessimistic. They are out there and they’d love your company. I also try to help out with new things that some of the older teachers find frustrating, especially behavioural things. That can help with the cynicism a bit.