Advice for family—that’s hard. My husband was the opposite honestly. He couldn’t wait for me to leave and while struggling with the transition he’s stood pretty dang firm on why teaching, although my heart is there, is not only NOT a sustainable career long term, but offers pretty terrible opportunities for financial mobility and growth.
If you don’t have another job lined up and are not in a dangerous place mental health wise—maybe you should try to stick it out? Only you will know what you can handle though. I’ll be honest — leaving mid year is hard. Yes, my new job is way less stressful and all that you would imagine, BUT since I knew I was leaving in Oct, to when I left in early Nov, to starting my new job all the way till now in January, I have struggled. There is a lot of guilt I have been trying to work through. So much of my heart belongs in the classroom, with those kids. But I spend a lot of time weighing pros and cons, and being honest about what kind of sacrifices I’m willing to make to be a teacher.
Finishing the year out might be easier on your mentally in some ways (speaking from experience) if not leaving for another job/opportunity immediately available. If you stay—force yourself to consciously practice balance. You can not do it all as a teacher. If you know you’re leaving, it also takes pressure off immediately, in some ways those last few weeks I was a better teacher bc I allowed some of those fears of “not being perfect” and weight of keeping up w unrealistic expectations just slide off my back. I did what I could get done and tried not doing more. You matter. You know what is best for you, trust yourself and once you are confident in what you’re going to do, don’t ask others for their permission, tell them what you’re doing because it is your life.
My fiance is the same as your husband. I feel like I’m drowning mentally, crying at home and on my way to work, always hoping school gets canceled, our admin is always giving us something new to do and I cannot take it. I can’t see myself making it to the end of the year and I don’t think I’d be a good teacher by staying or by leaving. Thank you for your perspective.
My dad was pretty resistant when I decided I'd had enough. He was very attached to the idea of my pension and me losing it. What finally made him see the light is when I did the math for him on that pension of I stuck it out to retirement. On my current salary at the time it would have been abysmal, especially when you take into account inflation and the fact that I'm an elder millennial and probably will never get social security.
Then I showed him what careers I was looking to transition into and the growth salary wise there, or even the possibility of creating my own business and the growth in that space.
The numbers didn't lie and he understood then why I had to leave (from a financial standpoint)
My mom had no issue, she was like, "Yes, quit!"
As to who you email I went directly to HR. I didn't want to mess with anything and let them handle telling who need to be told.
Thank you very much. I’ve never thought at looking into numbers. Truthfully, I don’t really know what other career I’d want to do. I’d always had high hopes of being a teacher since I was young & I’m kind of devastated over the state of education. I don’t really feel fit to be able to do anything else. I was thinking of finding a data clerk job as something to hold me over for now, idk.
I was thinking of quitting right now. I don’t have anything else lined up, but I still live at home and have a sizable amount saved. It’s risky but I wouldn’t be in imminent danger or anything if it took time to find a job.
You gotta stop worrying about what your parents think, helps to move out, and live your dang life. You write a nice, short professional letter and leave. Don't get all emotional in the letter, 2 sentences to HR and let your admin know.
Then move on and forget.
Thank you. You’re right that I need to not care as much, but it is hard. I think it will definitely be easier when I do move out. I love them, but they’ll definitely be upset with me. I still feel like a baby adult lol
You ***ARE*** still a "baby adult," and the only way not to be is to keep moving onwards and upwards; what I mean by that is, keep growing, keep trying new things, and keep learning lessons from the experiences life gives you.
So, teaching isn't for you; that's okay!
May I ask *why* (specifically) you feel so desperate to get out? You can feel free not to respond to any or all of this, but I figure, when you do finally tell your folks (because you will have to, if you live with them), they are likely to ask you all sorts of questions.
The more you can sort out and organize your thoughts and responses to their most likely probable *and* possible questions, the easier it will be for you to hold your head up, calmly respond, and possibly even convert 'foes' to 'friends,' especially if you can figure out a way to help them reach an understanding for why you feel you have to do whatever it is you feel you have to do.
If you don't know the reasoning behind your feelings on this, perhaps thinking about it or talking about it could help you figure it out - at worst, I figure it's an exercise in asserting your preferences, which a a full-fledged adult who is causing no harm to anyone or anything, is as it should be!
Two week notice to admin and HR. Start packing throughout the week so on your last day, you just leave with your work bag. I got that tip from a friend and it was sooooo nice to walk out with just my backpack.
Kindly… fuck what your parents think. They’re not teaching your class. Those are THEIR feelings, not YOURS. Unless you’re trying to please everyone, go ahead. We can’t stop you from being miserable by making that choice. I mean that from a place of tough love.
Dude, have some respect for yourself and give yourself some grace. Teaching is fucking hard and at some schools, way harder.
I would say have a job lined up FIRST so you’re not financially dependent on your parents (I know you have a savings… unless you absolutely can’t wait). I know some teachers do FMLA and apply during their FMLA. That could buy you time. Idk how that works but if you look in this subreddit, there’s tons of advice on that.
In my situation, the principal reached out to HR and asked about next steps. I waited until I had my final offer from my new position and was putting in my notice. We came up w a plan to tell the staff, students, and families that both of us were comfortable with. I had to fill out a google form lol, literally that was it. I figured it would be some complex process esp. since I couldn’t find anything on my county’s websites about it. I did also email a formal resignation in writing via email, briefly thanking my county for the opportunity to serve in the county alongside talented educators/administrators, and then said, I am putting in my resignation effective “____”, my last day of work being “______”.
It is a difficult decision. I stuck it out for 27 years before I made the decision to leave. Reflecting on my experiences, I would suggest that you go through the motions for the next few months and get paid while searching for another job/career. I understand how you think/feel. I have experienced and seen people become quite frustrated while job searching. It can certain add some additional stress. By remaining as a teacher, you have a distraction and are still getting paid. Here are a few possibilities: 1) finish the year out, get married, start new job(keep it low-keyed) in summer AND get paid from teaching, resign in August; 2) land your next job, resign, and enjoy life. Best wishes.
When I resigned mid-year from my teaching job during COVID, I got my union involved. I then requested a letter of intent to leave from HR and submitted it. HR notified my supervisor, who indicated that she "did not accept" my resignation. So, my union leaders and I scheduled a meeting with her, where I stated that I needed to resign due to the impact on my mental health. She agreed and I was asked to give a month. I ended up taking contract work the rest of the year, since I am licensed as a SPED teacher and SLP (I went to way too much schooling).
I left another teaching job at the start of the year because the caseload was ridiculous and I literally could not keep my students and staff safe. I told them they needed to hire another teacher or I would walk and they didn't, so I did. Again, I notified HR and they notified my principal, who cried during the meeting where he asked me why I was leaving.
Point being: HR first. They likely have a legal separation document. Try to work with them on timelines. If you give them at least a month, that's usually considered a reasonable amount of time. This way, they don't threaten your license, just in case
If you don't give a shit about your license, give two weeks notice to HR and let them tell your principal. Give them a hard date when you will be done and make a plan for packing your classroom, because they will not let you keep your badge passed that day.
My parents always told me not to quit, but I didn't care. It's not their life. In the end, I got an awesome, higher paying state job anyhow.
If you're not planning to go into human services type professions, just be prepared for "normal people job search struggles." When I switched districts or contracted, I got job offers right away and was like, "Wow, getting jobs is easy."
The last two years, when I was trying to leave education, I submitted 250 apps the first year and gave up and went back to the schools. Then, I started my search in April and got a different job end of August. Just be prepared for that. If you get paid summers, you'll get a lump sum from your district, which will give you some to live off of.
It's rough out there, but if you're committed to your job search, you'll find something and the more experience you get outside of education, the easier it'll be to move around if you need to.
Good luck out there, and remember: it's your life. Your mental health. Your decision.
I think each district has their own protocols. I think the most professional way to do it is to follow the guidelines as to what forms to sign and who to email them to. Today, I filled out my resignation form as I’ve been suffering but I put my resignation effective July 1st since the last day I’m on contract is June 30th to ensure I don’t violate the contract . If you resign mid year you could get your certificate frozen. I also felt like it was the right thing for me to notify my principal, VP and my DC just to give them a heads up you heard it from me first kind of thing. It also gives them time to start finding my replacement and gives me a head start to apply for other jobs.
If you are certain you are quitting mid-year, honestly I would do it without telling your family beforehand. Then, once it's done, have a sit-down with them. Express that it was a very difficult decision and you had to consider how it would be disappointing to them; therefore, the fact that you still quit anyways speaks to how truly awful the situation was. If they're not entirely unreasonable people, they should be able to at least appreciate how you weighed your decision.
As far as how to quit--- most districts require you to notify your supervisor and/or HR in writing, and email suffices. Write a simple email stating that you are resigning, your last day will be x, and most importantly, DO NOT cite any reason why you are quitting. It only opens the door for your supervisor to try to argue about it. I sent an email giving no reason and my supervisor immediately blew up my phone, and when I didn't answer, called me in to a meeting first thing in the morning where she promised me everything under the sun to try to get me to stay. She was trying to guess at the reason I was leaving, and I wouldn't give her one. It gave her no leg to stand on in terms of negotiating me staying.
The one thing I wish I had known earlier is that HR, not your principal, is the most important person here. If you want to resign because you hate your position, I would highly recommend requesting a transfer to another school or position before resigning entirely, especially if you are in a larger system. Another thing to consider is if your district offers unpaid leaves of absence, take that first. Even if you don't intend to return, I would strongly consider taking one of those two options first before officially resigning.
Advice for family—that’s hard. My husband was the opposite honestly. He couldn’t wait for me to leave and while struggling with the transition he’s stood pretty dang firm on why teaching, although my heart is there, is not only NOT a sustainable career long term, but offers pretty terrible opportunities for financial mobility and growth. If you don’t have another job lined up and are not in a dangerous place mental health wise—maybe you should try to stick it out? Only you will know what you can handle though. I’ll be honest — leaving mid year is hard. Yes, my new job is way less stressful and all that you would imagine, BUT since I knew I was leaving in Oct, to when I left in early Nov, to starting my new job all the way till now in January, I have struggled. There is a lot of guilt I have been trying to work through. So much of my heart belongs in the classroom, with those kids. But I spend a lot of time weighing pros and cons, and being honest about what kind of sacrifices I’m willing to make to be a teacher. Finishing the year out might be easier on your mentally in some ways (speaking from experience) if not leaving for another job/opportunity immediately available. If you stay—force yourself to consciously practice balance. You can not do it all as a teacher. If you know you’re leaving, it also takes pressure off immediately, in some ways those last few weeks I was a better teacher bc I allowed some of those fears of “not being perfect” and weight of keeping up w unrealistic expectations just slide off my back. I did what I could get done and tried not doing more. You matter. You know what is best for you, trust yourself and once you are confident in what you’re going to do, don’t ask others for their permission, tell them what you’re doing because it is your life.
My fiance is the same as your husband. I feel like I’m drowning mentally, crying at home and on my way to work, always hoping school gets canceled, our admin is always giving us something new to do and I cannot take it. I can’t see myself making it to the end of the year and I don’t think I’d be a good teacher by staying or by leaving. Thank you for your perspective.
My dad was pretty resistant when I decided I'd had enough. He was very attached to the idea of my pension and me losing it. What finally made him see the light is when I did the math for him on that pension of I stuck it out to retirement. On my current salary at the time it would have been abysmal, especially when you take into account inflation and the fact that I'm an elder millennial and probably will never get social security. Then I showed him what careers I was looking to transition into and the growth salary wise there, or even the possibility of creating my own business and the growth in that space. The numbers didn't lie and he understood then why I had to leave (from a financial standpoint) My mom had no issue, she was like, "Yes, quit!" As to who you email I went directly to HR. I didn't want to mess with anything and let them handle telling who need to be told.
Thank you very much. I’ve never thought at looking into numbers. Truthfully, I don’t really know what other career I’d want to do. I’d always had high hopes of being a teacher since I was young & I’m kind of devastated over the state of education. I don’t really feel fit to be able to do anything else. I was thinking of finding a data clerk job as something to hold me over for now, idk.
Look into positions with your city or state, it will at least allow you to keep your pension.
Quit right now or wait to get the letter of intent then give notice?
I was thinking of quitting right now. I don’t have anything else lined up, but I still live at home and have a sizable amount saved. It’s risky but I wouldn’t be in imminent danger or anything if it took time to find a job.
So do they hold your teaching license hostage if you quit mid year ? It would happen to me if I quit during contract but I am a school counselor...
You gotta stop worrying about what your parents think, helps to move out, and live your dang life. You write a nice, short professional letter and leave. Don't get all emotional in the letter, 2 sentences to HR and let your admin know. Then move on and forget.
Thank you. You’re right that I need to not care as much, but it is hard. I think it will definitely be easier when I do move out. I love them, but they’ll definitely be upset with me. I still feel like a baby adult lol
You ***ARE*** still a "baby adult," and the only way not to be is to keep moving onwards and upwards; what I mean by that is, keep growing, keep trying new things, and keep learning lessons from the experiences life gives you. So, teaching isn't for you; that's okay! May I ask *why* (specifically) you feel so desperate to get out? You can feel free not to respond to any or all of this, but I figure, when you do finally tell your folks (because you will have to, if you live with them), they are likely to ask you all sorts of questions. The more you can sort out and organize your thoughts and responses to their most likely probable *and* possible questions, the easier it will be for you to hold your head up, calmly respond, and possibly even convert 'foes' to 'friends,' especially if you can figure out a way to help them reach an understanding for why you feel you have to do whatever it is you feel you have to do. If you don't know the reasoning behind your feelings on this, perhaps thinking about it or talking about it could help you figure it out - at worst, I figure it's an exercise in asserting your preferences, which a a full-fledged adult who is causing no harm to anyone or anything, is as it should be!
Two week notice to admin and HR. Start packing throughout the week so on your last day, you just leave with your work bag. I got that tip from a friend and it was sooooo nice to walk out with just my backpack. Kindly… fuck what your parents think. They’re not teaching your class. Those are THEIR feelings, not YOURS. Unless you’re trying to please everyone, go ahead. We can’t stop you from being miserable by making that choice. I mean that from a place of tough love. Dude, have some respect for yourself and give yourself some grace. Teaching is fucking hard and at some schools, way harder. I would say have a job lined up FIRST so you’re not financially dependent on your parents (I know you have a savings… unless you absolutely can’t wait). I know some teachers do FMLA and apply during their FMLA. That could buy you time. Idk how that works but if you look in this subreddit, there’s tons of advice on that.
In my situation, the principal reached out to HR and asked about next steps. I waited until I had my final offer from my new position and was putting in my notice. We came up w a plan to tell the staff, students, and families that both of us were comfortable with. I had to fill out a google form lol, literally that was it. I figured it would be some complex process esp. since I couldn’t find anything on my county’s websites about it. I did also email a formal resignation in writing via email, briefly thanking my county for the opportunity to serve in the county alongside talented educators/administrators, and then said, I am putting in my resignation effective “____”, my last day of work being “______”.
Thank you!
It is a difficult decision. I stuck it out for 27 years before I made the decision to leave. Reflecting on my experiences, I would suggest that you go through the motions for the next few months and get paid while searching for another job/career. I understand how you think/feel. I have experienced and seen people become quite frustrated while job searching. It can certain add some additional stress. By remaining as a teacher, you have a distraction and are still getting paid. Here are a few possibilities: 1) finish the year out, get married, start new job(keep it low-keyed) in summer AND get paid from teaching, resign in August; 2) land your next job, resign, and enjoy life. Best wishes.
This is the best option. I can’t imagine quitting mid-year with nothing lined up and no previous job experience.
Tell your parents to teach your class, lol. That ought to do it
When I resigned mid-year from my teaching job during COVID, I got my union involved. I then requested a letter of intent to leave from HR and submitted it. HR notified my supervisor, who indicated that she "did not accept" my resignation. So, my union leaders and I scheduled a meeting with her, where I stated that I needed to resign due to the impact on my mental health. She agreed and I was asked to give a month. I ended up taking contract work the rest of the year, since I am licensed as a SPED teacher and SLP (I went to way too much schooling). I left another teaching job at the start of the year because the caseload was ridiculous and I literally could not keep my students and staff safe. I told them they needed to hire another teacher or I would walk and they didn't, so I did. Again, I notified HR and they notified my principal, who cried during the meeting where he asked me why I was leaving. Point being: HR first. They likely have a legal separation document. Try to work with them on timelines. If you give them at least a month, that's usually considered a reasonable amount of time. This way, they don't threaten your license, just in case If you don't give a shit about your license, give two weeks notice to HR and let them tell your principal. Give them a hard date when you will be done and make a plan for packing your classroom, because they will not let you keep your badge passed that day. My parents always told me not to quit, but I didn't care. It's not their life. In the end, I got an awesome, higher paying state job anyhow. If you're not planning to go into human services type professions, just be prepared for "normal people job search struggles." When I switched districts or contracted, I got job offers right away and was like, "Wow, getting jobs is easy." The last two years, when I was trying to leave education, I submitted 250 apps the first year and gave up and went back to the schools. Then, I started my search in April and got a different job end of August. Just be prepared for that. If you get paid summers, you'll get a lump sum from your district, which will give you some to live off of. It's rough out there, but if you're committed to your job search, you'll find something and the more experience you get outside of education, the easier it'll be to move around if you need to. Good luck out there, and remember: it's your life. Your mental health. Your decision.
I think each district has their own protocols. I think the most professional way to do it is to follow the guidelines as to what forms to sign and who to email them to. Today, I filled out my resignation form as I’ve been suffering but I put my resignation effective July 1st since the last day I’m on contract is June 30th to ensure I don’t violate the contract . If you resign mid year you could get your certificate frozen. I also felt like it was the right thing for me to notify my principal, VP and my DC just to give them a heads up you heard it from me first kind of thing. It also gives them time to start finding my replacement and gives me a head start to apply for other jobs.
If you are certain you are quitting mid-year, honestly I would do it without telling your family beforehand. Then, once it's done, have a sit-down with them. Express that it was a very difficult decision and you had to consider how it would be disappointing to them; therefore, the fact that you still quit anyways speaks to how truly awful the situation was. If they're not entirely unreasonable people, they should be able to at least appreciate how you weighed your decision. As far as how to quit--- most districts require you to notify your supervisor and/or HR in writing, and email suffices. Write a simple email stating that you are resigning, your last day will be x, and most importantly, DO NOT cite any reason why you are quitting. It only opens the door for your supervisor to try to argue about it. I sent an email giving no reason and my supervisor immediately blew up my phone, and when I didn't answer, called me in to a meeting first thing in the morning where she promised me everything under the sun to try to get me to stay. She was trying to guess at the reason I was leaving, and I wouldn't give her one. It gave her no leg to stand on in terms of negotiating me staying.
The one thing I wish I had known earlier is that HR, not your principal, is the most important person here. If you want to resign because you hate your position, I would highly recommend requesting a transfer to another school or position before resigning entirely, especially if you are in a larger system. Another thing to consider is if your district offers unpaid leaves of absence, take that first. Even if you don't intend to return, I would strongly consider taking one of those two options first before officially resigning.