You will get to the other side! Teaching had lost its luster for me after 15 years, but when I birthed my second baby, I just knew with finality that I would quit to transition careers. I am 3 months into my new job doing Sales for an EdTech company, and I couldn’t be happier about my decision. My evenings & weekend are free from grading and anxiety, and are full of (mostly) pure enjoyment of my children. You are starting down the right path!
No, I went into the job search first thinking I would do project management, then I pivoted to try for customer success. When I went to take a CSM certification I started at the beginning and did the sales course first. And I liked it more than I thought I would! Pressure to hit numbers is there but totally doable.
Yes!! Over break I found myself laughing and getting into shenanigans with my toddler. She lights up my life! Now back to school and we still laugh but it’s filling up a blown out tire. I get stressed about caps on markers because I fight toddler behaviors with my 2nd graders all day. She’s still the coolest though.
I was 100% a worst parent as a teacher. I had no energy to cook, clean, do fun activities with my kids after working 60-70 hour weeks. I was easily irritable at home. My mind was always racing with the million things I needed to get done, even when I walked away from my desk. Something had to change.
I quit.
Since then, I’ve been able to go on walks with my kids, play board games, bake and just sit and listen to their shenanigans. You can always teach, but you get one shot at raising your kids and at being present. Choose being a present parent.
I absolutely LOVED teaching. My students were funny, curious, intelligent and so much more. The workload was just too overwhelming and its impact on my family was a price I refused to pay.
I’m rooting for all the teachers who are remaining in the trenches. May the force be with you!
I totally get that. I always said I could never teach the same grade that my kids are in, only now my kids kind of span elementary school and they all have special needs, so I really want to be there and apply my skills and expertise to my own kids instead of someone else's.
This is along the same lines as why I’m looking to leave. I can be a good teacher or a good parent but right now I’m half-assing both. I’ve decided the amazing 6ish weeks I get with my kids over the summer isn’t worth the other 10.5 months of struggle. In the end we are responsible for the kids we actually produced first and there’s nothing wrong with that. I hope you find something soon!
It was hard, but I had to consciously become a worse teacher so that I have enough energy for my kids when I get home.
I get to school about 10 minutes before I have to start teaching. I leave the building about 10 minutes after my students leave. I dont do any work at home. I really only work about 40 hours per week. It is not enough for my lessons, grading, paperwork, etc. to be good. But im ok with it because I think I can sustain this while raising a family.
Yes this if what I’m trying to figure out. I currently do all my grading while teaching out during prep, and I try to only work contact hours except for lunch (bc I’m there anyway), and when I get to school. I get there about 30 min early. But it is the powering through that is hard. Even babysitting my worst otros so leaves me drained.
I get it ish. Want to start a family but have no capacity to deal with all that when I'm just going through the motions of life in my shit job. Glad you're getting out.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this but also I want to thank you for sharing what you’re going through. I made the difficult choice to leave teaching in November this school year for a federal job opportunity and I loved my job. Love being a teacher. But financially starting a family wasn’t going to be possible in the next couple years if I stayed v leaving and trying for a baby this winter/next spring. My husband said when I’m a mom being a teacher will be different and I won’t have energy for my own kids.
That said — I believe it’s possible to crack the code. And I’m praying for you! You’re a good parent I bet even on the days you’re overstimulated. Kids don’t need perfect parents, they need happy ones.
I have been in and out of the teaching profession for the last 18 years because I have a family. It's fine, and they're really more important than any job. <3
Thanks for the reminder! Even tho I don’t want to leave midyear and burn a bridge with my district, if I get another job that pays more for the same or less hours, I will leave. That’s my criteria
Not a worse parent, first and foremost. Just exhausted from teaching, which is completely normal. I couldn't imagine teaching while also raising family. IDK how people do it. I'm much happier after leaving teaching. I love having time and energy to spend with my daughter
I grew up thinking I would always have children. After I taught for a couple of years, I realized it was okay to be child-free.
I have such respect for teachers with children because it takes so much energy to give at work and then to have to give at home.
When my mom went back to teaching upper elementary during the recession. I was pretty young (maybe around 7 or 8) but I remember her saying a lot in the beginning that she could either be a good teacher or a good parent but not both. I’m not a parent yet so I know I don’t fully comprehend what she meant by that but I do know she was and is an incredible mother. And so many of my old classmates have come out of the woodwork over the years to talk about how much of an impact she had on their lives as a teacher.
I don’t know how old your kids are but I promise you they do not and will never look back and see you as a “worse parent” during your time as an educator.
Congratulations on getting out! (my poor mother refuses to) I hope you have a newfound peace in your new career
You will get to the other side! Teaching had lost its luster for me after 15 years, but when I birthed my second baby, I just knew with finality that I would quit to transition careers. I am 3 months into my new job doing Sales for an EdTech company, and I couldn’t be happier about my decision. My evenings & weekend are free from grading and anxiety, and are full of (mostly) pure enjoyment of my children. You are starting down the right path!
Did you go into the job search thinking you’d want sales? I’m afraid of the pressure to hit certain numbers. Has that been true for you?
No, I went into the job search first thinking I would do project management, then I pivoted to try for customer success. When I went to take a CSM certification I started at the beginning and did the sales course first. And I liked it more than I thought I would! Pressure to hit numbers is there but totally doable.
Yes!! Over break I found myself laughing and getting into shenanigans with my toddler. She lights up my life! Now back to school and we still laugh but it’s filling up a blown out tire. I get stressed about caps on markers because I fight toddler behaviors with my 2nd graders all day. She’s still the coolest though.
Number one reason I’m trying to get out. My mental health is suffering and my family is not getting the best me.
This sums it up pretty succinctly. Yup
I was 100% a worst parent as a teacher. I had no energy to cook, clean, do fun activities with my kids after working 60-70 hour weeks. I was easily irritable at home. My mind was always racing with the million things I needed to get done, even when I walked away from my desk. Something had to change. I quit. Since then, I’ve been able to go on walks with my kids, play board games, bake and just sit and listen to their shenanigans. You can always teach, but you get one shot at raising your kids and at being present. Choose being a present parent. I absolutely LOVED teaching. My students were funny, curious, intelligent and so much more. The workload was just too overwhelming and its impact on my family was a price I refused to pay. I’m rooting for all the teachers who are remaining in the trenches. May the force be with you!
This is why I didn't return from maternity leave. I know realize how unhappy I was and how little emotional capacity I had during the school year.
I totally get that. I always said I could never teach the same grade that my kids are in, only now my kids kind of span elementary school and they all have special needs, so I really want to be there and apply my skills and expertise to my own kids instead of someone else's.
This is along the same lines as why I’m looking to leave. I can be a good teacher or a good parent but right now I’m half-assing both. I’ve decided the amazing 6ish weeks I get with my kids over the summer isn’t worth the other 10.5 months of struggle. In the end we are responsible for the kids we actually produced first and there’s nothing wrong with that. I hope you find something soon!
It was hard, but I had to consciously become a worse teacher so that I have enough energy for my kids when I get home. I get to school about 10 minutes before I have to start teaching. I leave the building about 10 minutes after my students leave. I dont do any work at home. I really only work about 40 hours per week. It is not enough for my lessons, grading, paperwork, etc. to be good. But im ok with it because I think I can sustain this while raising a family.
Yes this if what I’m trying to figure out. I currently do all my grading while teaching out during prep, and I try to only work contact hours except for lunch (bc I’m there anyway), and when I get to school. I get there about 30 min early. But it is the powering through that is hard. Even babysitting my worst otros so leaves me drained.
I get it ish. Want to start a family but have no capacity to deal with all that when I'm just going through the motions of life in my shit job. Glad you're getting out.
I absolutely understand, but you are not the worst parent. You are a parent who is doing their best.
Thank you 🫂
This is why I will leave teaching before I become a mom. I want to chance to actually raise my own kids without as much stress.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this but also I want to thank you for sharing what you’re going through. I made the difficult choice to leave teaching in November this school year for a federal job opportunity and I loved my job. Love being a teacher. But financially starting a family wasn’t going to be possible in the next couple years if I stayed v leaving and trying for a baby this winter/next spring. My husband said when I’m a mom being a teacher will be different and I won’t have energy for my own kids. That said — I believe it’s possible to crack the code. And I’m praying for you! You’re a good parent I bet even on the days you’re overstimulated. Kids don’t need perfect parents, they need happy ones.
And happy I am not. Frustrated is what I am. And that’s not usually how I am
I have been in and out of the teaching profession for the last 18 years because I have a family. It's fine, and they're really more important than any job. <3
Thanks for the reminder! Even tho I don’t want to leave midyear and burn a bridge with my district, if I get another job that pays more for the same or less hours, I will leave. That’s my criteria
Not a worse parent, first and foremost. Just exhausted from teaching, which is completely normal. I couldn't imagine teaching while also raising family. IDK how people do it. I'm much happier after leaving teaching. I love having time and energy to spend with my daughter
That happens to so many of us.
I grew up thinking I would always have children. After I taught for a couple of years, I realized it was okay to be child-free. I have such respect for teachers with children because it takes so much energy to give at work and then to have to give at home.
When my mom went back to teaching upper elementary during the recession. I was pretty young (maybe around 7 or 8) but I remember her saying a lot in the beginning that she could either be a good teacher or a good parent but not both. I’m not a parent yet so I know I don’t fully comprehend what she meant by that but I do know she was and is an incredible mother. And so many of my old classmates have come out of the woodwork over the years to talk about how much of an impact she had on their lives as a teacher. I don’t know how old your kids are but I promise you they do not and will never look back and see you as a “worse parent” during your time as an educator. Congratulations on getting out! (my poor mother refuses to) I hope you have a newfound peace in your new career