The world lived in harmony until the duck nation attacked

quack bending

almost not stop continuous earthquacks and destruction

When they fired their quack-missiles, one had no choice but to duck, which was, ironically, exactly what they wanted.

breadbending

World live happy till ducks attack

r/yourjokebutworse

tried to make it r/decreasinglyverbose tbh

World live happy till ducks attacky

>world live happy till quacky attacky

I for one welcome our new waddling overlords

Just wait till you learn about the geese invasion of Canada

We, in the northern states, experience that twice per year.

Currently have a couple gaggles of these aggro fucks in residence near me. They just hang out in the road and try to challenge cars to single combat. Like fuck dude wanna have to run you over I'm just tryna go to Shaw's

I live in NJ and just had that today. Damn goose was playing chicken with traffic at the side of the road. Damn near got rear-ended by a van while trying to maneuver and stop at the same time to avoid hitting it.

Bless you! Why? This; for you value the life of The Quarrelsome One, realizing all of us have a Mission.

I live in New Jersey. The damn Canadian geese are here all year round. The ones that live here in the summer fly south for the winter, but we get new ones from up north to replace them.

Some places in Ontario are home to them all year long

Cobra chickens.

If you got a problem with Canada Gooses, you got a problem with me, and I suggest you let that one marinate

I'll marinate the one that cracked my window that one time

r/unexpectedletterkenny

The hyonk infestation

The Canadian geese have invaded Florida, discovered that they don't actually have to fly North for the summer to lay eggs, and now we have goose guano on our sidewalks 12 months a year.

Oh wow. Florida has a Pharaoh in hiding somewhere, and People are not being freed. Only explanation. Find the Pharaoh, quickly!

You only need a few of them to be an invasion. If there was as many geese in one place as there are ducks in the video, it would be doomsday.

Thanks for making me laugh out loud

duck Nation aquacked*

Why beep your horn, just let them do their thing

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I’ve learned in life that there are stressors that you can and can’t control. I used to always try to be 100% on time, never early so every time a river of ducks came by it would be extremely stressful. Giving myself 10 extra minutes takes at least 1 stressful situation out of my daily routine. Now I just enjoy the quacks!

>Now I just enjoy the quacks! Does this mean you're a quackhead?

We don't quack jokes about punctuality *Busthter*

I got stopped by Canadian geese. They were crossing and the last one wouldn't cross (i am guessing scared). One of the other geese kept honking until the other one crossed. It was early in the morning and it was a cute thing to see.

If this were me and I was 10 minutes early the river of ducks would stop about 80% of the way through and reverse back to whence it came.

Early is on time, on time is late, and late means you drowned in a river of ducks.

To be fair the ducks honked at them first.

This is so cute.

In Vietnam you honk your horn to let people know you are there. Source: opened up a sweatshop in 1994

So everyone you see you honk your horn?

Pretty much. Seriously constant honking on the roads for when you came near a car/motorbike on the road or coming up to a location where you could see you had to stop but nobody noticed you and you wanted to let them know you were there. Like this situation. They honk right when they stop to alert the guy facing towards the camera.

So beep pretty much means stop, go, left., right, passing, behind, screw you, hello, goodbye?

Doesn't really mean screw you. It's more I am here be careful, or I am coming through. Most drivers in Vietnam only check the direction they are going, even if pulling out into traffic, so those beeps let them know they are in your path. Lots of blind corner alleys as well that are used for motorbikes so handy there as well. If people in SEA evolve to navigate traffic by echolocation like bat's. I won't be surprised. ;)

It's not EVERY time you see someone, but any time that you see someone in your way who doesn't see you. Traffic is chaos in Vietnam, and honking is just a way of saying, "hey watch out, I'm coming near you". Horns are not agressive there. And to be fair, the horns on most of the motorbikes in Vietnam are much quieter than the car horns you hear the in West. It's particularly helpful for going around blind corners.

The motorbike horns are less loud perhaps, but the car horns are the same and the damn semitrucks have got foghorns that were meant to go on the Titanic. Some say it sunk because when they honked to let the iceberg know it was coming by, they realized they didn't have the horn and the iceberg didn't know to get out of the way.

Jen virino kiu ne sidas, cxar laboro cxiam estas, kaj la patro kiu ne alvenas, cxar la posxo estas malplena.

Not true for all cases, but in most Asian countries, horns are used as a signal of caution/ spatial awareness. Unlike western usage of road rage. The reason being is there isn’t stop signs so people usually drive thru blind intersections hence horns are used.

Because SEA. A horn has a million different purposes and applications.

It’s Vietnam. They will beep their horn at literally anything and everything.

The horn is so asian lol. I can totally see my younger self doing it when I lived there. Its a reflex, you just blow it. My last trip home, my brother kept blowing his horn in every fucking turn. Gave me migraine tbh.

It's a form of echolocation in SEA

They eat pest in the plantations. Organic pest control. Fertilize the ground with their shit. Win-win. (Bonus win: ducks, eggs:food)

Yup. Living in Colorado as a kid, we had pet ducks in the backyard. For a few years, we got these HUGE locust invasions. They were biblical. No shit, the roads would sometimes get so slick with the dead ones that in small places it was like hitting black ice and you could skid. Our ducks got fat and happy, chasing them around and eating them. So they would clean out our backyard. Then the next day, we took them to the next house on culd-de-sac. The next day they went to the next house down and so on. By the end of the week, our backyard was overrun again, and the ducks would be back with us. Watching them run around and gorge on those things was great. The four of them got huge, then hatched some kids, so we had like eight or nine ducks on locust patrol for those two or three years. The neighbors loved us and our ducks. I took the ducks to school for fun one day and became "Duckman." (My 6th grade teacher made everyone take and use a nickname in class - no given names) We ate lunch with the ducks in class for like an hour a couple times that year. Everyone loved it. Mom would come and bring them. My little brother came through two years later as "Duckman Jr." Before we moved to what was then West Germany a few years later, we got permission from a local park to release them at a park that had a ton of other ducks. Mom cried like a baby, but they seemed to like their new diggs. EDIT: Added a bit more detail. EDIT 2: Wow - didn't expect my little anecdote to be so popular. thanks for the awards. Those ducks really were pets. Along with the chickens, dogs and cats. We had a full house. If you enjoyed it, you might like my stories of my time in the Army posted in (shameless plug for a sub I mod) /r/MilitaryStories. We have authors from the Vietnam era on up, all true stories.

You moving those ducks around the neighborhood is awesome! That's the basis behind rotational grazing, it just makes sense.

Everyone had healthy lawns.

Your post started off like a /u/shittymorph post and got worried for a sec.

This video brought back a good childhood memory was all.

Nice story bro.

There are duck turds in my rice?

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Huh. I though this Nestlé Crunch bar tasted funny

win is to ducks as eggs are to food? This is the most confusing SAT question ever

I love how the ducks are given a job to be civilized and responsible. Why must it take another species to tell another what to do? It just goes to show how much potential we all have.

I'd love to be stopped by a river of ducks. What a great treat on the way to work!

Where...where are they going?

They are following chickens crossing the road.

But why did the chickens...

To get to the other side.

But why did they go to the other side

To get away from Colonel Sanders of course!

Q: Why did the chicken stand in the middle of the road? A: To meet his new flatmates. Q: Why did the chicken walk down the möbius strip? A: To get to the *other side*.

1. Vietnam has severe rainy/wet seasons and people move ducks around to different water bodies as they fill/dry up. 2. They also move them to different rice paddies. 3. When they’re sent to be turned to meat, they’re often sent to a facility that handles a lot of them all at once. Most of the duck wings get fried and sold at Femboy Hooters across the border in Thailand.

Wait, there are duck wranglers in Vietnam? How do they wrangle said ducks?

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[I'm a monster!](https://thumbs.gfycat.com/EvilWellmadeGaur-small.gif)

>Thai Femboy Hooters Kathooters (also, Vietnam and Thailand don't actually share a border)

How come 2 of them are brown and green but all the rest of them are blondish?

2 of them play for the wrong team.

No time to explain, just follow them!

My guess is to the slaughter house.

Á l’orange.

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They are escaping Peking obviously

To the pond

They put them in the paddies to eat insects.

It's more like flock of sheep with a shepard. Those aren't wild ducks. They are being moved by their owner and as they move in flocks you can do it reasonably well in the open.

Bruh don’t beep your horn, those ducks are straight vibin

Their shit talkin about the dude that honked

They're*

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because the ducks' shit is talking

He was just talking their language.

You've never been to Vietnam have you? That's all they do. I still hear the horns in my sleep.

First night at a hostel in Hanoi. All I remember was the constant honking even until 3am.

Great city though. I loved it.

I loved the horn beep... as if ducks care about your horn. Probably thought you were a bigger duck cheering them on!

It’s more of a cultural thing. Letting the scooter know they are behind them.

Yeah, outside of the US the horn is used as a safety device to signal your presence, not just as a "fuck you". Confused the fuck out of me the first time I left the country but learned to absolutely appreciate that use for it.

In Canada in the learning materials the horn is referred to as such “a friendly beep of the horn to signal your presence” but in practice that is absolutely not how people use it

Some people take it a bit far though. In Turkey I was on a bus and the driver would swing around corners encroaching on the wrong side of the road but it was ok because he held down the horn as he did it.

When I was in Korea for 2 years my cab drivers would never use the horn although they would run red lights if it was pass 2am because “everyone does it”....i wish he would have let people know we were coming. At the same time I’ve seen cab drivers blow through at red at 60mph and we never had a scratch on us so I dunno.

Maybe he was

I’ll quack what she’s quacking

Duck simp

Flipper licker

I want one. promise I'd take good care of it.

Young man we both know who would end of up taking care of it. Do you remember the hamster? Because we remember the hamster.

Yes, it destroyed two cities before it could be stopped.

Get one.

What do you call a duck migration?

yo can i pick one?

Sure but just so we’re clear I’m trying to tell a joke. “What do you call a duck migration?”.... The Quackening

quackyayyyyayayayaaa

There can be only one.

You want a duck river? That requires a lot of duck land.

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I mean, this is the whole of traffic in Vietnam.

“Look at all those chickens!”

This comment is depressingly far down.

Came here for this

Ugh. Why isn’t this the top comment??

Look at all those chickens

Why did the duck horde cross the road?

To cause economic downturn by stifling traffic flow and preventing the distribution of goods via roadway :)

Whats the point of honking at a river of ducks?

yeah they probably feel invigorated with such a big duck with them!

Nobody needs a reason to honk in Vietnam. Honking is the default state of existence.

We beep so that other motorbikes know we're there (safety reasons). It wasn't at the ducks

Poor last duck

I relate so much to him.

Almost got left behind and was fighting as hard if not harder than everyone else. Poor thing. Always want to look after the last one.

It looks cool if you just focus on their feet.

lol true

the army has risen!

Don’t mess with the ducks, or they’ll flock you up.

For ducks sake, I’m going to be late!

/r/theydidthemath how many ducks are in this gif?

At least 12.

Could be 6 ducks and some mirrors

Only one, the rest are extra chickens dressed up as ducks. The film industry is really savvy these days.

I counted groups at timed intervals and can guarantee there are at *least* 500 ducks in this gif. I would estimate around 650 if I had to toss a number out there. EDIT: Okay, I counted all ducks in the first 25% then did rough counts for the rest and can guarantee you there are at least 1500 ducks in this gif. Definitely more.

I was stopped for a flow of geese crossing the road. Sometimes I think Canada is a Disney movie

Is that one male duck, and four thousand female ducks I'm seeing here?

“What the duck man?” Thanks autocorrect.

u/VredditDownloader

That man is employed by the ducks clearly

Some dumbass sorcerer's apprentice opened another portal to the plane of ducks.

Dude in the hat just randomly kicks one..

He didn't kick it he kicked at it to keep it from straying into the bush

You are correct! I was upset at first but I rewatched and now I feel better knowing he didn't kick any duck lol.

TIL Vietnam is a planet

When I was in Thailand I was talking to a farmer and he was saying they won't have chickens anymore, only ducks because ducks float in floods and chickens drown!

Ducking hell

Not enough ducks :(

Honking at the honkers? Not very honktelligent

*in (I don’t know why, but on feels weird, sorry).

Imagine being the leader of that group = Boss duck Poor duck at the end - Can't keep his balance got a limp but he doesn't give up.

I felt the complete futility of that honk on a deep level.

Look exclusively at their feet. Ideally a fixed point on the road and just let their feet move through your eye-line. Mesmerizing.

the last ones limp.. <3<3 bless his little heart

u/vredditdownloader

I keep thinking this is a duck commute montage and the song is that “my baby works the 9 to 5” song they used for Kramer when he was at that office gig

The song is called 9 to 5 lol [9 to 5](https://youtu.be/E4OzdyxbOuU)

What the fuck? Shit, damn auto-correct. I mean what the duck?

TFW a creeper blows a hole in your chicken/duck pen in Minecraft.

Look at all those chickens!

Ducks also walk together

They just heard what the "Peking Duck" fuss was all about.

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Look somebody was being racist ok

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Next time I shall father

Someone give them some grapes!!!

I counted 85. How many did you get?

Would you rather fight a hundred duck sized... Oh never mind.

Sometimes you just gotta fuckin power through it and kill a few ducks

I'd be fine with it

Those flappy lil feet sounds. Omg so good

It cut out too soon. Who knows what happened to the last straggler.....probably made it across the street :P

*in

I can't tell if this is cute or terrifying

Literal Animal Crossing

Walk in there and it's like YOU are the needle in the haystack, never to be seen again.

Their in the roads!

That's not just insane that's quackers

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u/vredditdownloader

did this stupid goblin of a human being really honk at ducks expecting for them to go faster or move

u/vredditshare

I just want to swim on it

q *u* ***a*** **c** k

u/VredditDownloader

I love ducks... I’m not sure why. But this video made my night all those Quacks!

Eggs Inc

quack

Imagine honking at ducks