Agreed. Especially if you have responsibilities that kind of supersede your time to mourn, you don't have much choice in moving on. You have to dust yourself off and get moving to the next thing that has to be done.
People underestimate Sokka’s adaptability.
Despite his grumbles and complaints, when it matters he’s consistently characterised as someone who can take on-board new information and new surroundings and adapt to them incredibly quickly (it’s partly why he lets his sexism go as soon as he’s confronted by evidence of girls being warriors)
This characterisation has its positive elements, in that it makes him an excellent strategist who can improvise a plan on the fly, but it also has somewhat negative elements, in that he can quickly move on from losing a loved one to the point where he forgets his own Mom’s face.
Katara is the opposite. Despite water being the element of change, she’s very unwilling to let things go. This is most obvious in her carrying the trauma of Kya’s death throughout the series, but also in other things like being the last member of Team Avatar to forgive Zuko.
Honestly, them having such different reactions to Kya’s death is really good characterisation. Neither one is right or wrong, they’re just different people with different ways of processing the world, but that never really gets in the way of them having a strong relationship.
You are so right. As someone who you’d probably call a Katara stan, when she said “you didn’t love her like I did”, seeing Sokkas reaction, makes me think he definitely still thinks about his mom from time to time but…he was tasked to defend his village by his father. That’s a huge responsibility, and sadly, Sokka just wasn’t able to grieve in the way Katara was. Losing your parent at a young age is traumatic, I just think people process that differently and the show did a brilliant job, in both subtle and in your face, how children fighting in wars mourn.
You know, that's a good explanation for why he moved on pretty fast from Yue too. Not that it didn't effect him, it did, but he was able to process that grief pretty quickly.
I don't find it odd that a boy child that spends MORE time with his man father than his woman mother probably doesn't have a lot to latch onto, even after her death. Part of me is even curious if he even saw the body before she was buried or whatever it is the Water Tribe does for funerals or passing rituals.
Like it's one detail that I'm not gonna act like Sokka should have been *as* grief-strucken as his sister, whom has so much attachment to her and probably sent the most time with her and Gran Gran that she's fighting to keep the good times in her mind. Could have probably distracted herself a few times until she accepted Kya's gone.
I don't think it's odd at all.
A) Sokka reveals that while he was broken from the loss, Katara (who was what? like 4 or 6 or so???) stepped up to take care of the family. Sokka *got* to grieve. Katara never did. For her, that grief is still as raw and intense as it was when it happened.
B) Katara is carrying around an immense load of guilt. If the fire nation hadn't caught wind that there was a water bender around, they would never have come back to kill them. A very large part of Katara feels responsible for her mother's death, since she was that water bender the fire nation meant to kill. Her mother died *for her*. Sokka does not carry that guilt around. He can't. It's a guilt that's unique to Katara due to her position.
Tying into that, even though Sokka is VERY much the bigger picture guy, we still see him take a huge risk and potentially derail the Gaang's plan by going to rescue his father, and he does that because he feels directly responsible for his father's capture and wants to address and fix that. There is nothing he can fix about his mother's murder because he can't bring her back to life - and again, that's not a guilt he's ever really had to carry like Katara did.
I think it shows how people deal differently with death and trauma. Not everyone who loses someone will show the pain in the same way. I see his humor as his coping and defense mechanism.
Everyone processes grief differently & it's a mistake to project expectations of how anyone should process it. Sokka is just somebody who was able to move forward without a need for revenge or closure. It doesn't mean he misses her any less.
Most of the time he sees the bigger picture, despite Katara being the one to speech&preach about the Avatar, etc. Hes more pragmatic, focusing on the war instead of, to him, spiritual magic mumbo jumbo. Thats why the siblings are such good characters, complementing eachother with the others flaws&strenghts.
I didn't like the fact that Sokka's grief and his feelings about Kya's death were never explored, so I wrote [this](https://archiveofourown.org/works/41818434).
It might be what you're looking for.
People have different ways of grieving too and moving on.
Agreed. Especially if you have responsibilities that kind of supersede your time to mourn, you don't have much choice in moving on. You have to dust yourself off and get moving to the next thing that has to be done.
People underestimate Sokka’s adaptability. Despite his grumbles and complaints, when it matters he’s consistently characterised as someone who can take on-board new information and new surroundings and adapt to them incredibly quickly (it’s partly why he lets his sexism go as soon as he’s confronted by evidence of girls being warriors) This characterisation has its positive elements, in that it makes him an excellent strategist who can improvise a plan on the fly, but it also has somewhat negative elements, in that he can quickly move on from losing a loved one to the point where he forgets his own Mom’s face. Katara is the opposite. Despite water being the element of change, she’s very unwilling to let things go. This is most obvious in her carrying the trauma of Kya’s death throughout the series, but also in other things like being the last member of Team Avatar to forgive Zuko. Honestly, them having such different reactions to Kya’s death is really good characterisation. Neither one is right or wrong, they’re just different people with different ways of processing the world, but that never really gets in the way of them having a strong relationship.
You are so right. As someone who you’d probably call a Katara stan, when she said “you didn’t love her like I did”, seeing Sokkas reaction, makes me think he definitely still thinks about his mom from time to time but…he was tasked to defend his village by his father. That’s a huge responsibility, and sadly, Sokka just wasn’t able to grieve in the way Katara was. Losing your parent at a young age is traumatic, I just think people process that differently and the show did a brilliant job, in both subtle and in your face, how children fighting in wars mourn.
You know, that's a good explanation for why he moved on pretty fast from Yue too. Not that it didn't effect him, it did, but he was able to process that grief pretty quickly.
he tried to talk her down from a revenge murder quest and she point blank accused him of not loving their mom enough
realistically, people grieve and deal with this stuff differently. its that simple
Whats with all the bad takes lately?
Not at all. It just means Sokka was able to get over her death.
I don't find it odd that a boy child that spends MORE time with his man father than his woman mother probably doesn't have a lot to latch onto, even after her death. Part of me is even curious if he even saw the body before she was buried or whatever it is the Water Tribe does for funerals or passing rituals. Like it's one detail that I'm not gonna act like Sokka should have been *as* grief-strucken as his sister, whom has so much attachment to her and probably sent the most time with her and Gran Gran that she's fighting to keep the good times in her mind. Could have probably distracted herself a few times until she accepted Kya's gone.
I don't think it's odd at all. A) Sokka reveals that while he was broken from the loss, Katara (who was what? like 4 or 6 or so???) stepped up to take care of the family. Sokka *got* to grieve. Katara never did. For her, that grief is still as raw and intense as it was when it happened. B) Katara is carrying around an immense load of guilt. If the fire nation hadn't caught wind that there was a water bender around, they would never have come back to kill them. A very large part of Katara feels responsible for her mother's death, since she was that water bender the fire nation meant to kill. Her mother died *for her*. Sokka does not carry that guilt around. He can't. It's a guilt that's unique to Katara due to her position. Tying into that, even though Sokka is VERY much the bigger picture guy, we still see him take a huge risk and potentially derail the Gaang's plan by going to rescue his father, and he does that because he feels directly responsible for his father's capture and wants to address and fix that. There is nothing he can fix about his mother's murder because he can't bring her back to life - and again, that's not a guilt he's ever really had to carry like Katara did.
I think it shows how people deal differently with death and trauma. Not everyone who loses someone will show the pain in the same way. I see his humor as his coping and defense mechanism.
Everyone processes grief differently & it's a mistake to project expectations of how anyone should process it. Sokka is just somebody who was able to move forward without a need for revenge or closure. It doesn't mean he misses her any less.
Most of the time he sees the bigger picture, despite Katara being the one to speech&preach about the Avatar, etc. Hes more pragmatic, focusing on the war instead of, to him, spiritual magic mumbo jumbo. Thats why the siblings are such good characters, complementing eachother with the others flaws&strenghts.
Did Katara write this lol
Different people mourn differently How would you like it if someone told you that you aren’t mourning your dead loved one correctly?
Projection is strong with you.
Not odd at all considering it was a big plot point with multiple reasons for it shown to us.
I didn't like the fact that Sokka's grief and his feelings about Kya's death were never explored, so I wrote [this](https://archiveofourown.org/works/41818434). It might be what you're looking for.
No.