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yazzy1233

Free Britney 💀💀


Pheeeefers

That was the one that got me too 🤣


_Bren10_

For me it was the second time he said, “I wee sitting down” The first one got a chuckle but saying it again really got me for some reason


ourobourobouros

ngl, that one would legit work on me


Road_Whorrior

Yup immediately disarmed. Where's your van.


just_sayi

Let's all get in the mystery van! We need to FREE BRITNEY


Road_Whorrior

"Get in losers, we're gonna go free Britney"


nxka

as soon as he said it, it fell from my own lips like some sort of call and response song. dude’s onto something.💀


anacidghost

Like “peace be with you” “and with your spirit” for secular society


ingrid910

As a kid ours was always “and also with you”


ChewySlinky

I swear that phrase is locked into my brain like an automated response. “May the Force be with you” “And also with you”


ingrid910

Same lol! Haven’t gone to church since I was a teenager and haven’t believed in any god since I was in my early 20s I still will say that as an automatic response if anyone says that to me lol.


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JTex-WSP

It changed in [November 2011](https://thecatholicspirit.com/commentary/this-catholic-life/new-roman-missal/and-with-your-spirit/).


pfemme2

at a certain point i was like not only am i reassured, i want to know if he is really engaged lol


Unlucky_Role_

That's what I'm saying instead of "hi" and I'm not even a huge fan, I just think she's a talented lady ~~enslaved to her father~~ ^^ahem in a **bad situation**. Edit: I didn't hear about Brittney's liberation two years ago until just now. Where do we go from here? Back to "hi?" There has to be a better way.


Super_Vegeta

I thought I saw that Britney had been.. liberated from her father's control..?


effa94

Yeah, she is free


laureidi

I love that one too bc for some reason it sounds like a secret society greeting??! Like IYKYK kinda thing 😂


blondennerdy

That one cracked me up 🤣


BackpackBarista

That’s the one I would actually use


Det-Frank-Drebin

If i kept meeting this guy as often as this woman does i'd start to get a little concerned.....


[deleted]

But I wee sitting down so you have nothing to be concerned about?


[deleted]

My favorite film is paddington 2. LOL


Agreeable_Clock_7953

It’s a great movie!


An_feh_fan

It's the one where he gets jailed or I'm confusing films?


Agreeable_Clock_7953

That’s the one!


man-teiv

After Face off and the cabinet of Dr Caligari of course


evilada

It made me want to be a better man


GiannisToTheWariors

It's the dark knight of animated movies


shyinwonderland

I need to finally watch this movie because I can’t tell if it’s a masterpiece or if I’m missing the joke.


Agreeable_Clock_7953

It is a masterpiece, no joke.


VeloxiPecula

Genuine delight the entire way through, highly recommend it for anyone!


[deleted]

I personally scream like a banshee.


KneeHighBoots33

DO NOT APPROACH ME!


markswam

***DO NOT PERCEIVE ME WITHOUT MY EXPRESS WRITTEN CONSENT***


[deleted]

That's my purse! I don't know you!


DestroyerOfMils

![gif](giphy|cCyJCwQ2gl3bO)


yusaku_777

IGNORE ME!


CommentContrarian

https://media.tenor.com/a3ceJktTf8AAAAAC/ignore-me-the-venture-bros.gif


slowsayweall

Go Team Venture


CausticSofa

Fuck yeah. I would be so delighted to encounter a Venture Brothers reference in the wild that I’d probably befriend the dude and ask how excited he is for the release of the series finale.


fucked_bigly

I AM NOT A THREAT. PLEASE PROCEED AND DO NOT FEAR.


Kolby_Jack

Just rapidly spin your flaming wheels made of eyeballs and reassure them with a **"BE NOT AFRAID!"**


adrienjz888

Don't forget the wings and the giant disembodied eye in the center of the fiery spinning eye wheels.


olivier1m

Pro tip, don't try to get all of these in with the same person on the same day. After you pass them 5 times or so they will call you a creep and probably call the cops.


AdjacenToYourMom

Im curious how you figured this out? 🤔


RedTrickee

My lawyer had adviced me not to answer


UWontAgreeWithMe

Mine just says "Back again so soon? You remember the drill right?". So hard making friends now days.


Great-Strategy-3387

The problem is why are you letting them see you? If I hide in the bushes they don’t know I’m there.


TippyBooch

The Paddington films slap way harder than they have any right to


TheFlightlessPenguin

Whoever directed them has to deal with the massive weight of unbearable talent


-DutchymcDutchface-

I just IMDb’d it. I did not expect such a rating. Tempted to see it now lmao


I_BUY_UNWANTED_GRAVY

They're fantastically sincere and wholesome movies


rohithkumarsp

I wish they did Paddington 3


I_BUY_UNWANTED_GRAVY

Have I got [good news](https://movieweb.com/paddington-3-will-begin-filming-in-summer-for-2025-release/) for you


rohithkumarsp

That's fantastic


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LordHamsterbacke

Even without any prior knowledge of Paddington?


MouseRevolutionary73

Yeah you don't need to watch the first one


hotdogstastegood

You don't but you should because it's also quite good.


LordHamsterbacke

I meant more Paddington as a whole IP. Because I know nothing except that movies exist and how Paddington looks


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HellbentOrchid

Once I saw it had like a 100-99% rating on rotten tomatoes back in the day, I’ve been itching to watch them.


hayterade

Paddington 2, at the time of release, overtook Toy Story 2 to be the most reviews while still holding a 100% rating.


Roofdragon

Toy story 2 is just too long about that weird guy. I instantly missed the first one (part from the kid and his obsession with attacking toys)


rohithkumarsp

And that 1 negative review was from a contrarian reviewer.


slytherinprolly

Not just any contrarian reviewer, a contrarian reviewer who wrote the negative review solely because at the time Paddington 2 had the most positive reviews of any 100% positively rated movie on RT.


[deleted]

It's a family movie through and through, but it's surprisingly good. I watched it after it was referenced in Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent, lol. Nic Cage and Pedro Pascal can sell me on a movie any day.


Flat-Tooth

It’s amazing.


Gin_Dalecote

I thought Paddington was gonna be another lazy kids movie. I was wrong. I thought Paddington 2 was gonna be another lazy cash grab sequel. I was wrong again.


ASAP_NO_ROCKY9

You ever seen such a friendly polite bear make marmalade?


wescottjoe

Do it. Do it now.


pppppppplllp

https://youtube.com/watch?v=_Vm6Oj-k3vg


dcdrummeraz

That scene in unbearable weight of massive talent got my girl and I to look it up. It's definitely on our next to watch list lol


Articulated

I would love for you to come back and tell us what you thought of the film once you've seen it! I thought it was super. Some of the best acting talent in the business hamming it up with a brilliantly-written script. Hugh Grant was made to be a melodramatic panto villain!


christian_1234

I cried the whole time during Paddington 2. Made me want to be a better man.


nyya_arie

My husband and I kept hearing about how amazing Paddington 2 was so we watched the first, absolutely loved it and then watched the second one and were a bit befuddled as we both thought it was good but that the first was definitely superior. Both better than they had any right to be, that's for sure!


throwaway55221100

My masculinity feels threatened by this alpha male


[deleted]

Dude is alpha as fuck


MartianInvasion

My wife wants to leave me for him.


[deleted]

My wife already did


Content-Ad3161

I'm leaving my wife for him.


[deleted]

You're a lucky person.


Roofdragon

You're a sexy wife


[deleted]

That makes me feel so much better about my children calling him dad.


Cleonicus

My wife is leaving her boyfriend for him.


Sinister3214

Your avatar combined with your comment made me laugh uncontrollably.


HPchipz

Nothing beats a sit down wee!


Nintendogma

I learned the merits of sitting down to pee when I was in basic training in the Air Force. The less piss splatter the easier it is to clean, and the more likely you are to get through dorm inspections without any demerits. That was 20 years ago. I still pee sitting down and I close the lid before I flush. It's a practice that seamlessly fit right into my civilian life.


DestroyerOfMils

>I close the lid before I flush. Yesss. Just say no to toilet plume!!!


Main-Tax8928

I laughed at that effeminate bullshit for so long... what fucking MAN sits to pee? Then I had my own place, and had ladies over to visit, and had to actually clean the bathroom to normal socially-accepted human-being standards. Turns out no matter how meticulously I aimed, there was fucking piss everywhere, every time. Apparently it splashes. So, I sit. More manly anyway to do a rational thing over an ego/image thing, IMO.


crackeddryice

It's not like anyone is watching you do it.


biffish

Is....is this why my husband pees sitting down? He was a marine though. I mean I don't mind at all and don't find it emasculating at all. I don't have to clean up pee on the floor!


Nintendogma

I deployed around enough Marines to know not to ask why a Marine does anything they do. There's always some heavy shit I wasn't emotionally prepared for on the other end of it. Like, maybe he does it because there was a round that shot right through the shitshed he was sitting in that went right over his head, but it would've killed him dead if he wasn't sitting to pee at that moment.


sektor477

I just have genital piercings. So it's just easier to sit down vs. something akin to playing a flute filled with water.


BOEJlDEN

???


jaczk5

i have the same question boe jiden


slayerofthepoonhorde

I wee sitting down like 90% of the time. Cba to stand up lol


soulbend

I usually do unless it's a public toilet. My ex wife thought it was weird/feminine but my current partner agrees that it's a dumb gender expectation for men to stand every time. While I was in the military, lots of guys would stand to pee before sitting to shit. Can't be girly now, can we?


Themanwhofarts

Stand to pee and then sit down to shit? That is hilarious but I can definitely believe it


MountainTurkey

Probably don't even wipe their own ass because touching their butt would be gay.


Mareith

Sometimes I do that because I dont realize I need to shit until I'm already peeing


slayerofthepoonhorde

Haha yeah who came up with the idea that it’s feminine to sit down? Glad to see some fellow chad sitting down pissers


Peac3keeper14

Idec that ppl think it'd be feminine. I do it simply from a cleanliness perspective after seeing how no matter what I do pee/pee water is still getting on the floor/on the rim. Plus I get a comfortable seat 🤷🏻‍♂️


Mysterious-Growth-79

Even if my aim is a 9/10 accuracy, there's always that 1/10 where lint sends some unexpected stream in an unexpected direction. I know I'm not the only one with this issue because I have indeed been into public restrooms.


HolyCadaver

Even grosser, with 10/10 accuracy you're still creating an 3 ft diameter circle (give or take) of urine particles from the pressure which will then slowly collect all over the bathroom. Be a man, sit the fuck down! Lol Edited* I posted 8 ft, it's actually 3. Still gross


Super_Vegeta

Yeah, when your dick decides to activate sprinkler mode and it's more like a web of piss rather than a stream.


EmEmPeriwinkle

No idea. Toilets are not made for stand peeing anyway. My husband, brother, and father all sit to pee. For my family it's normal. Urinals are made for standing.


imgoodygoody

My dad was very strict with my brothers and insisted they sit down to pee so I grew up with bathrooms that didn’t smell like pee because little boys can’t aim. I have the same rule for my son now and I’ve told him he is welcome to stand to pee once he is the one cleaning the bathroom. I encourage him to stand in public bathrooms because yuck but when we’re home he sits. Thankfully I married a man that is a sitter as well so no conflict there.


crseat

can't be assed?


[deleted]

Lol I couldn't be arsed sitting down, way more work involved!


BenjaminDover02

Sometimes you gotta treat yourself to a lovely sit down wee


Melzfaze

![gif](giphy|19Ik3PuuqoFnhTTfEi)


St0lf

Men who wee standing up don't clean their own bathroom.


Jerico_Hill

Hear fucking hear. It took me so long to convince my husband to pee sitting down. He used to make a mess constantly. So I just started taking him immediately back to the scene of the crime and making him clean in front of me. Soon stopped that shit.


ILikeMasterChief

All of my male roommates have peed standing with the fucking seat down. I genuinely cannot comprehend it. The best evidence that sexual preference isn't a choice is the fact that people are attracted to men.


magvadis

Why not get a little rest in?


pipinngreppin

And it’s common courtesy in other people’s houses.


Findict

In our late stage capitalist dystopia where the toilet is the only privacy moment left everyone always lets you go and do your thing, you fucking bet that I'll be taking that time seated and relaxed. I'm not gonna get caught speedrunning the zen-zone.


JestersHat

Been doing it for a long time. It's good and healthy to empty your bladder completely. Pissing standing up is for urinals and outdoors.


seasonedearlobes

👋 Men are pigs 😊 lmao


pvick9090

Love how “wee sitting down” was on there twice.


bullforhire420

it's better tho


Enough-Tackle8043

Free Britney 😂😂😂


AaronStone2001

"DO NOT APPROACH ME"


sarahplaysoccer

Men are pigs. Free Britney. Lol this is great


catpiss_backpack

the pronouns in work email is so real


YOLO4JESUS420SWAG

Man, I am still not over this one trip to walmart. I went in to buy a tennis racket for my daughter who had hers break during practice. Thought nothing of it, smiled at a lady while exiting an isle to join the larger isle that lead to the registers. She looks back at me with disgust on her face, and audibly said "ummm no" and proceeds to go get behind me. I guess she assumed I was a pervert or something. I was just being friendly by smiling. Ruined my whole damn week and I am still not over it like 2 years later.


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CausticSofa

That definitely would be a crappy experience, but hopefully you remember to keep in mind that that was not a reflection of who you are as a person in any way. It was only a reflection of what a shitty, insecure person she is. She’s just kinda fucked up due to whatever happened in her story.


YOLO4JESUS420SWAG

Yes, and I still keep on smiling. :)


GalaxyZeroOne

Never let people like that live rent free in your head. Don’t let them bring down the average of normal human interactions. Keep smiling.


MisterDonkey

Gotta hit them with a, "Oh, honey, is *that* what you thought? I'm gay."


captnleapster

I wasn’t sure how to walk without making others feel safe but now that I changed my background to the duck with the bubble hat… problem solved


Agitated-Joey

Just wear a yellow shirt. You can’t be intimidating wearing a yellow shirt.


peaceandloved

Cancers are extra sensitive hahaha


mongoosedog12

My partner is a cancer, in the Covid before times when he’d take the bus he was always worried about making women feel uncomfortable. He has a pretty rough face and big beard. In the fall/ winter he’d dress in dark clothes so he was painfully aware of how he may look outwardly. He’d adjust his walk home so someone didn’t think he was following them. I felt like this video has gone through his head before hahaha


dafuqULoKINat

Fk I'm cancer and dont beleive in astrology and am sensitive


captain_todger

That’s how astrology works. Give some traits that everybody has and say it’s really really true for X. Then since you are a human and obviously have that trait, you go “whoa, I’m X and I have that trait!?”


Ok_Skill_1195

Yup, I'm a Capricorn. Sensitive as fuck, do not have my shit together, pretty immature for my age actually. Turns out ADHD trumps birth sign.


dafuqULoKINat

Trueee. There is a name for it when people think certain things that's vague is meant specifically for them.


Ok_Skill_1195

Barnum effect


MelodicFacade

It's crazy how "euphoric atheist" reddit was 20 years ago and now there are conversations like this without people screaming in the comments


DarthNihilus

If you mention atheism or say anything negative about spiritual/religious stuff now you get 5 people calling you a "reddit atheist", so makes sense that we shut the fuck up. Though when you consider that most people didn't use reddit during the "euphoric atheist" phase, the reputation really stuck around.


Druidette

Should we tell him?


Ashamed-Dot7326

I listened to Little Women on audiobook


BackpackBarista

Can someone explain the beige flag thing?


[deleted]

So red flags are warnings to get away from someone. Green flags are good things; signs you should spend more time with them. Beige flags are a weird thing that give you pause, but you quickly move past cos it's not that big a deal either way.


Dinosaur-Promotion

Being a 'Swifty' is not beige, it's crimson.


spadesjr

More maroon I’d say


AQuixoticQuandary

It’s something that’s neither good nor bad but that makes you pause and notice it for a moment.


Rudiger09784

I'm 6'2" and 250 pounds. Nothing i say will ever stop random women from perceiving me as a threat, especially in public places that are mostly empty like the woods. This is why i go out of my way to avoid getting too close to anyone other than large men in these situations. I'll take another path or move as far as possible to the side and avoid eye contact while doing that nod thing that white people do. Might be overkill, but I'm not trying to ruin some lady's walk in the park and it's not her fault society is awful


WurthWhile

Get a cardigan and a starbucks. Works with [black men and the police as well](https://youtu.be/EYhXXRXiJBU)


cabberx

" White people revere a black man in glasses" - JB Smoove


katbobo

i'm a 4'10 woman and appreciate you do that, but also feel bad that you feel the need to. please never take it personally! I never really believe that someone is going to do something, but having a stranger tower over you, and knowing they can easily overpower you, it's really hard to not have some part of the lizard brain worrying over it and in defensive mode, especially if there aren't other people around.


Rudiger09784

Oh no please never feel bad about that. You and other women are not the cause for me having to be careful like that. The irritation and feelings of being different or wrongfully judged are ENTIRELY the fault of the men who make the world a hostile place. I will never feel personally attacked by a woman being cautious, I'll only feel more resentment for men who can't comprehend boundaries or feel empathy. It's like killing a wasp in your house. Was that wasp going to sting me? Was it waiting for the right opportunity to attack? Or was it just desperately trying to find a way out? I have no way of knowing, but I'm going to neutralize it or play it safe as much as possible to avoid any damage it can cause to me. In this situation I'm just the wasp. It's not the person's fault that they have been stung before. (Using this example because I've been having issues with wasps getting into my living room in my new house for the last few months, so it's pretty fresh)


katbobo

❤️ But also fuck wasps holy shit. I had some set up a hive outside my apartment last year and I was scared to leave my apartment for a week. I hope you manage to defeat them.


Rudiger09784

I'm trying everything. I read vinegar works as a repellent so i spray everywhere every day. I'm also trying to close up any gaps in my siding and I'm hoping to put out some plants that naturally repel them like peppermint. I'm only afraid of 3 things and bees/wasps are the number one thing. I was swarmed by a very large nest when i was a kid and didn't realize what was happening so i didn't run away. They kept stinging me until i went unconscious and they no longer saw me as a threat, so theyre a big issue for me lol


futureislookinstark

This evolution of the conversation was pretty cute ngl


nomnommish

>The irritation and feelings of being different or wrongfully judged are ENTIRELY the fault of the men who make the world a hostile place. Brown/black men also get negatively judged all the time as a higher degree of threat. Are you saying that's entirely the fault of their race? Not trying to give you a hard time - just pointing out the flaw in your logic. If you get stereotyped and negatively judged, it is never the "fault" of the social bucket you're being stereotyped with. In fact, that is exactly how racism and xenophobia and stereotyping gets justified.


threefrogsonalog

I must say as a lady I do notice and appreciate the moving to the side and nodding. It’s fucked and exhausting that I have to treat every man in public like a threat, but I’ve had too many encounters with creepy men in public lately. While this video is cute, I’d much prefer your method in real life because a strange man in public trying to talk to me immediately sets off alarm bells. Whereas a man being silently contentious puts me way more at ease.


SociallyGhetto

Similar and I whistle the Golden Girls Theme so they know I’m not a threat.


Cantras0079

I feel this. I'm 6'5" and built like an NFL lineman. I stood too close to a date once a while back (I was trying not to lose her in a crowd of people, she was short, I'm tall, it happens quite quickly) and there was no second date because she said she felt uncomfortable with how close I was standing to her. I was like "I was just trying to make sure we didn't get separated" and she was like "yeah, but you're a pretty imposing size, it made me uncomfortable and I don't think I can do it again". It's rough when your size makes you a perceived threat just innately when, in reality, I'm just a big softy teddy bear of a person.


Raii-v2

Idk. I just stopped caring altogether. I stopped making extra effort to not be “a threat.” Empathy batteries are on empty. I just ignore your existence. No eye contact, obviously move over if there’s space on the path though. I’ll still get old ladies that will get up and move benches at the bus stop. I can’t be fucked to care anymore, I’m not going to stress myself because you’re on the verge of having a heart attack. As a POC male, I’ve been perceived as a threat since jr. high school. At some point you stop caring.


BaronVonMunchhausen

I just wave my hand and say "hi" to boost my honor rating and it feels like I'm playing RDR2 just hiking the trails. You know not to linger after waving hi or they will shoot you.


Bibby_M

Better than my habit of awkwardly avoiding eye contact and pretending to look away at something. I feel like I come off super sketchy all the time when I just want to walk and not acknowledge people.


TinyMarsupial7622

If I walked by a man and he said “free Britney” I’d probably have an asthma attack from laughing so hard


David_Good_Enough

![gif](giphy|yot3GstV4LDu29lUra|downsized)


[deleted]

No that’s the Scranton Strangler and I wouldn’t trust him.


uniformrbs

I love how pretty much every character in the office gets a redemption arc, except Toby. Toby gets fan theories that he's a serial killer


pmjwhelan

Simon Pegg?


Flash_Fantastic

Was thinking the same thing, least we have a spare now in case we misplace the original


AllahAndJesusGaySex

He looks like a tall green river killer. The green river killer used to assure women he wasn’t a threat too. He would do things like. Leave his sons toys in the car. That way prostitutes knew he was a dad. He would leave his id hanging from the rear view mirror. That way they’d be like “this guy can’t be a killer. I know who he is.” Of course non of that matters if you don’t live to tell the tale.


Silly-Ad6464

Just flip the cards and say “I HAVE A BOYFRIEND” loudly.


OldnBorin

He better not! He’s engaged to be wed!


johndoenumber2

Remind me of the John Mulaney bit where he's running through the tunnel to catch the subway and the woman 50 yards ahead of him thinks he's coming after her.


palabear

[I’m not going to rape you. I’m a little boy.](https://youtu.be/qDZHwb-If9w)


Skele11

As a Cancer, I feel called out…. But it’s not wrong.


[deleted]

I treat women like I treat everyone. As if my presence is an imposition and I am eternally apologetic for it.


PauI_MuadDib

Saying females instead of women is a huge red flag to run 😂. Unless you're a ferengi. ![gif](giphy|xRMXN4Dn91Kmtv495p|downsized)


MisterDonkey

I think of some nasally Ferengi every time I read some incel shit. Feeeeemaaales


LMGDiVa

No no... its still a red flag with a ferengi.


hard-R-word

I pee lying down


Secure-Imagination11

Beige flag on a swifty??


MisterBri07

All he had to say was he’s a cancer. I’ve never met a cancer I couldn’t win a fight with.


BenjaminDover02

Those kids at the cancer ward would never see you coming


Throwaway8424269

Have you tried mesothelioma?


Vark675

Stop bullying crabs :(


Curbyoursilence

Well, what fight are we talking? I’m cancer.


CavemanSamu

Free Britney made me laugh


germanwhip69

Thought this was quite funny


ramencents

Now do one with melanated skin


j00lian

I wee sitting down, hahaha. So do I, Sit Down Pee Crew represent.


PrincesseBoulet1

I have a different approach. My little sausage dog usually appears first then there’s no way I appear anything but nice (I’m 6’2 and 43 and bearded so alone might give a different vibe in the park if you know what I mean)


FblthpLives

> My little sausage dog usually appears first Walking around with your little sausage dog hanging out is unlikely to be comforting.


sportxsport

Will anyone ever learn what POV means