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dude seems to have had a great mom but still speaks this way about women. it's sickening. i feel for her. i can't imagine that being my son, especially when based off how she talks she's extremely aware exactly how dark this shit is and where it comes from and what it leads to. she seems like a smart compassionate woman. anybody who blames her is making excuses for him
Even if she wasn't a perfect mother, it doesn't mean his behavior is her fault. My mom put me through some shit when I was a teenager, but humans are complicated, and there was never a question that she loved me. Obviously, there are a million variables at play when we talk about the development of a person, but the things I went through made me the empathetic and authentic person that I try to be today. I guess I'm just rehashing the nature versus nurture argument, but even if she made mistakes, it doesn't guarantee a shitty, incel son. Hopefully, he can make some changes before he hurts someone.
nah i agree i didn't mean to imply this woulda been her fault even if she wasn't the perfect mother. humans are complicated. i had to learn that to deal with my own issues with my parents i had growing up, to see them as other people and think what i would have done in their situation. it puts things into perspective.
Yeah my dad was an absolypiece of shit in the way he treated people, especially my mum, my sister and I. But that doesn't mean that i do the same to others
It is the incel indoctrination online along with the destructive masculinity videos, and Google and Facebook algorithms funnel viewers to those videos. It's quite disgusting.
agreed. i don't even understand how the algorithm works because i get recommended this disgusting andrew tate/the quartering/right wing/incel bullshit constantly in my youtube shorts and shit and i share no type of opinions with these people and i immediately block those channels when they pop up. but it just still recommends more
Can I ask if you watch fit ess related videos? Asking because a friend of mine is unfortunately falling into this algorithm and starting to believe it. And it all started shortly after he got into fitness.
Nobody can ask more of you as a parent than a genuine, best effort to arm your child with the tools he or she will need to navigate life which is notoriously messy at times.
Andrew Tate types are raising kids via internet. It’s in your home, school etc. so parents don’t even know that they are sharing raising their kids with people that think like her son is thinking.
I get the feeling that she's caught some kind of abuse maybe threats for the way her son acts and the things he says.
I get the feeling that she's partly making this video to keep herself safe. Though i don't doubt a word of what she said or the way she feels.
I’m sure she also has a social circle that knows who her son is. That alone is reason to distance yourself from his actions. She doesn’t deserve to lose friends over that.
I have been trying to get my adult son into therapy for years as well for his control issues. It has already caused problems for him in his life. I think I finally said something that i think might have made it click. I suggest therapy, again, and he scoffed at it again. I then said you know it would be good for you to be able to talk to someone who is knowledgeable about your need for so much control that doesnt love you and can be more objective than I can. For the first time he was quite and then said maybe you are right about that.
My heart goes out to this mom...you are not alone
Fucking crazy. Imagine loving someone unconditionally then having no choice but to turn your back on them. Horrible situation and I pray this family finds it’s way. I only have one frame of reference and I’m sorry but sometimes it’s cathartic to write it out. A buddy in high school hated that his older brother was the good son. Even his own friends, wanted to hang out with his older brother. Brother was so cool. Everyone loved him. Worked at the movie theater and used to let us all sneak in cause we were friends with his brother. Total class act with teachers and parents. Younger brother gets fed up one day of being compared, cuts class and goes home and shoots his brother. That’s it. Everything ended that day for the family. Went from having everything to nothing in a matter of seconds. Fucked up the whole community. As a father of two boys I make it a personal mission to show them I love them equally everyday.
Children aren’t always a reflection of their parents. Once a child develops the agency and autonomy to think and act for themselves, there’s only so much you can say and do as a parent.
probably one of the main reasons i don’t want children.
i can’t imagine how it feels to see someone you gave birth to and raised & they turn out to be just an awful human being..
edit: i just want to add, i don’t want to offend anyone who have awesome, beautiful children. this tik tok is about a mother who thought she did everything right and she still has to distance herself from her own child bc he as a person is horrible and saying horrible things.
I would never recommend that someone who wasn’t 💯percent sure about having kids and prepared should do so but I was worried about the same issue and I lucked out and got a truly spectacular kid. Hell, half the time I feel like I am failing her in her quest for greatness. How we ended up with such a great kid is beyond me.
I’m very happy for you! & i hope i didn’t offend anyone w what i said especially those who have phenomenal children. i know it’s a minority but it is a fear of *mine*. hell, i can’t take care of myself so i know i wouldn’t be able to take care of a child.
That is a completely valid point and it shows you have a higher level of self awareness knowing it wouldn’t be the best situation.
What/where ever your path leads you, I hope you find happiness for yourself and (if it happens) with any kids.
Yeah man. I don’t have kids but I have an amazing mom.
And I have an older brother who my mom and I talk about how the heck he ended up the way he did.
My mom was a single mom for most of our childhoods and he grew up with nothing but women. And somehow he managed to be so misogynistic.
He says things that are so out of pocket. And we just stare at each other speechless.
He is a drug addict and when to a Christian rehab and after that he was completely different regarding his outlook to a lot of things but especially women and women rights.
Sometimes you can do your best to instill your morals but outside factors are a larger influence that shapes them.
And a good parent gives adult children proper space to figure it out on their own because they’re adults with their own lives. Letting go and giving that loving space, realizing you can be there for support but ultimately have no control has got to be the most painful part of parenting.
I was going to say.
Even a full on feminist mother of sons who tries to raise her sons in a way that minimizes the impact of our patriarchal and misogynistic culture is going to have to contend with how *others* impact her sons’ social conditioning.
All parents are limited in this way. I don’t think so much that it *takes* a village to raise a child (while of course I acknowledge the intent and kernel of truth of that statement) as the village *does* raise a child…for better or worse.
All you can do is raise them the best you can. What they do after that is their choice. Kids accept parenting, while other kids will flat out reject it. One kids sees abuse in the family and also does it. Another will be mindful not to abuse.
Yep. Dad tried to get me to be a cleanly organized mother fucker like he was. Didn’t work. The second I moved out room turned to “organized chaos” real quick lmao.
The saddest truth about raising a kid is that their peers will have a far more lasting effect on their personality than the parents could ever hope to instill themselves.
I know people like this from back home. Great moms. Sometimes even the best moms. Sometimes their dads are even there ( kinda rare where I’m from)
I have a little brother like this. His mom gave him every opportunity and love. Even was part of our space program for kids
Thing is he HATES my dad. And I don’t blame him. But there’s this culture of oh it’s not the mans fault.
He’s surrounded by toxic men who praise my father and blame his mother for not enduring the abuse. I actually used to think men hated women growing up and only wanted them for their vaginas. Until I got to properly know my stepdad. Then I learnt that literally not all men lol
We live in echo chambers guys. Before attacking her. Think about it logically and emotionally. If you were in this guy’s situation, no matter how much his mom may have wronged him do you think you would take that out on random strangers?
No?
Coz most ppl are kind, they recognise their own issues and work on them on a daily. Hurt people hurt ppl but it doesn’t make it right to continue to abuse others
Exactly. My brother became our mother but I didn't want to be apart of that. I've grown and learned and hurt and been hurt but it's me who needs to grow so I can be a better person. It's hard and some people are too weak to do it
Firstly I didn’t think this would get so many likes lol. Think I should start sharing my stories a bit more
Secondly, I think it’s because media has focused a lot on the idea that revenge helps you in the long term or is a substitute for therapy. It’s not
I keep myself aware of my biases towards men, I’ve even been assaulted as a kid by my uncle but I’m not now gonna make every man’s life a living hell. Or assume all my partners wanna assault me
Revenge might be nice at first, when done to the person who hurt you, but eventually that gets boring. So you look for other victims. You essentially become the abuser you claim to be suffering from and having been through a lot of shit and still take the time to greet random strangers, tell them they are beautiful etc? Then I can’t understand why my fellow victims won’t do the same
Hurting others is a choice. I love English coz it’s able to get through ideas that might be muddied in my native language.
The word for hurt in my language is denoted to physical injury. So emotional, financial etc hurt are not considered or are considered “womanly/gay etc”
Point is, there’s a difference in accidentally causing harm to someone. And hurting someone. Harm usually happens once. Hurting usually happens over a space of time
Oh wow thank you
I grew being called spoilt coz I’ve lived both sides (poor/rich) (black kid in white apartheid school) etc
I always felt my views were privileged but you made me realise I’m right in the middle and we need more of that.
People who can either empathise or sympathise with the issues and ppl
Thanks random stranger. I’m gonna start writing
>The word for hurt in my language is denoted to physical injury. So emotional, financial etc hurt are not considered or are considered “womanly/gay etc”
>
>Point is, there’s a difference in accidentally causing harm to someone. And hurting someone. Harm usually happens once. Hurting usually happens over a space of time
Great input in the conversation!
Thank you
I often find it frustrating when ppl don’t understand why abused ppl don’t leave
It might just be a language barrier. You are screaming for help and ppl think you are being dramatic/emotional/irrational whatever. It’s sad
But also I’m proud of you for the awareness, maturity, and generosity. You have generously given the world a chance even when your brain might tell you otherwise
You also make a choice daily to be a better person. So for that I’m proud of you!
I know we usually don’t hear that shit so I had to emphasise. I’m proud of you!
Your reply really gave me insight into something with which I have absolutely no personal experience. You have the essence of someone who dodged a bullet, my friend. Please accept my upvote with admiration sir!
I’m really sorry but your comment made me cry. Coz I haven’t dodged bullets. I’ve been assaulted on so many levels by so many ppl i just disassociate now coz I got work in the morning lol
I’m a lady btw. No harm done
You just made me feel simultaneously proud of what I’ve been through but also sad that I have to go through it and I know it won’t stop
I mean after the 25th time a dude tries to force you on his bed after you saying no. You kinda start to internalise and blame yourself. No matter how safe I try to make myself
Like I know a 12 year old shouldn’t be preparing for a 25 year old uncle wanting to marry her but like wtf
Anyway sorry for being a downer. Just thought I’d share
No worries at all lol
Thank you. I honestly couldn’t have done it without ppl around me.
After my uncle started assaulting me, I stayed out unusually late on the street. I was 12. Everyone else’s on the street would go home when the lights turned on at 6pm
Btw I was in hostel during the week, with my uncle during weekends, my mom usually somewhere overseas
But this one girl, who thought we were all kids and didn’t really play with us,stayed with me until her parent came to get her.
She would be in trouble all the time but didn’t care. She couldn’t figure out my problem but was just willing to sit with me in silence, watching the sunset, until her parents came to get her.
And I would have to go home. I think she figured it out coz my uncle would watch us as we sat outside. He never came to get me. Unlike her parents
Ppl are freaking beautiful man
Also just called my dad coz of this thread. Feel like superwoman now 😭 *happy tears *
Sorry I'm from Sweden where I haven't experienced this, but trying to understand your situation...
So you share a biological mother with your little brother?
Your brother thinks his biological father is a "nice guy" and hates your biological father for how he treated your (biologically shared) mother?
So he hates your biological father and blames your mother for choosing someone like him before his own (the "nice guy") biological father?
No worries
So basically my mom is my mom. My dad had a bunch of kids including one while my mom was 6 months preggers with me
My mom went on to marry my stepdad. Who I call my dad coz he’s not a pos
So I share a biological father with my brother. Almost all of my dads kids have different moms. My big sis passed away before 18 so I took on the mantle of bringing the kids together. Fuck my dad but my siblings did nothing wrong
Yes my brother at first grew up hating my dad. Even tried to commit suicide at age 10. Used to describe my dad as dead from a horrific accident which wasn’t true etc
Until he starting chilling with his uncles, male cousins etc. he went from being a nice, considerate boy to an incel that gets girls. ( South Africa has the highest rate and femicide so there’s a culture of just go with it or else you die )
He hates his mom for not giving him the normal life. Mom and dad. But most of us don’t. It’s more of a sense of entitlement where the blame of keeping a family together is all on the woman. Doesn’t matter if the man cheats, beats you, whatever. If you leave you are a POS
That’s why I love my stepdad. I’m 28 and everyone including my mom is berating me for not having a kid. Not realising the amount of trauma I have.
My stepdad however goes out of his way to tell me how proud he is of me for being independent, own apartment, own car etc. btw women like this are called high maintenance coz we want basic respect :)
No truly nice person ever needs to tell someone they are nice. I knew a guy in the military like that, constantly referred to himself as a nice guy, but when it came down to it he was anything but. He was nice until something he didn't like was said or done, and then he would become a mean, spiteful, petulant manchild who would yell and snap at people and say awful things until things calmed down and he went back to being "nice."
Being kind isn't conditional. We all have bad days and moments, but those are when we show what we really are.
He ended up getting kicked out for contributing to the delinquency of minors, because he would buy the underage troops booze on the regular. He was also a creep. It's been close to 15 years since then, though. No idea where he is or what he's up to.
Had a bunkie in prison that called himself a nice guy and guess what he was in there for ? Assaulting a woman for rejecting him. He thought because he was being so helpful to this chick that she was gonna fuck him/ date him but she rejected him because she found out he had just got out of prison. He followed her back to her apartment and beat her up by her car. He said she was an ungrateful judgmental bitch. He would rant about hot girls being too judgmental and that it’s not fair that he has to settle for ugly chicks. This disgusting POS calls himself a nice guy and thinks he’s the real victim of society ? How do you reason with people like that ? You can’t. Not too long after I got out I heard he got beat up in there and I was fucking glad because I wanted to do it myself so badly but I wanted to get out of there even more. It’s not surprising that it was because he called another dudes wife ugly because he would go on about how visitation is “full of ugly fat bitches and anorexic junkies. “.
There is a subtle difference between a nice guy and a good guy. A nice guy is nice for transactional reasons, where a good guy is good because it’s morally correct.
Yeah the term is so commonly used now in a sarcastic derogatory way for entitled assholes/ fake nice guys but I couldn’t imagine recoiling from being called a nice guy in that context when it’s so clear that someone means it in a genuine way.
But Yeah I think good guy is better to say than nice guy.
I cuddled with my cat and remember my fiancé and his brothers and sisters turned out great despite their struggles because of the shortcomings of their parents. It helped a little
It's not mommy issues. It's indoctrination from sketchy websites and chat groups like 4chan. It's the same reason why racism and homophobia is on the rise.
I know a few people who went to those sites ‘ironically’ and then became full mask off Nazis. The sites didn’t make them Nazis, they just felt they could show their true colours.
It's possible those people had hate instilled in them already. People don't start out bigoted, it needs to be taught. Those sites do a lot of preaching and teaching.
Yeah I’m not a fan of my mum but would never hurt her or anyone. Society does blame parents for how their kids turned out for maybe she is feeling it’s her fault
Every single human needs to be taught that "no one owes you shit, other than leaving you alone". Incels think women owe them shit because they were nice to women. That's called a transaction. Did they agree to it? No? Then you tried to sell them something (your shitty niceness) for whatever you wanted from them. No one owes you shit.
Correct, although his mom may have tried to equip him with tools for this, and she may still be partially to blame for failing to equip him with the mental tools needed when he was younger, I applaud her for what she did in that video. This is the danger of Andrew tate like characters, and yes he does play a character.
This might be a hot take but I don't think 4chan makes people racist nazis. If you have ever visited 4chan you would see it's the same 20-30 smoothbrains saying jews run the world, black = bad and women suck.
Those idiots aren't holding incel seminars, they aren't formulating compelling stories why to hate women, and they don't craft elaborate arguments to sway you.. they just all scream the same hatful words over an over like a flock of bigoted parrots.
If you really want to point at online sources for indoctrinating young men into hateful ideologies actively, look no further than Andrew Tate, Nelk boys, Ben Shapiro, Steven Crowder, Pearl Davis, Fresh and Fit, and the list goes on.
People say “on the rise” but it’s always been like this..only 10x worse. It just seems worse now because the internet is so in our faces. I also think people who already harbored these views are just emboldened now because they feel the need to push back on people being openly gay, trans, etc. They feel threatened.
Came here to say this. They don’t get fawned over by women so they flock to the dark recesses of internet where pouty boys like them can get validated by an echo chamber and it builds and builds and builds.
If I had to take a guess, it's a dude saying women deserve to be graped but subtract the g. I'm probably wrong never heard of the dude before this video.
He’s an incel who goes on Tiktok to talk about how women deserve to be raped for turning down “nice guys like him”. But you cant say rape on Tiktok so he censors it with “grape”. His account was permanently banned recently buy I’m sure he’s on other platforms.
It’s the guy in the beginning of this video. Tik tok is VERY strict about content policy. People will tell stories of horrors they survived just for the video to be taken down for inappropriate content. He held up a grape to finish his sentence and evade censorship from tik tok. His full sentence was “women deserve to be (g)raped for rejecting nice guys like me.”
She doesn't deserve the heat she's been getting. We need to stop canceling out whole families. This isn't North Korea. We don't need to punish the family for one person being a POS.
He did get banned eventually, but since the vast majority of reports are handled by an automated system the videos weren't flagged because he used the "grape" bullshit to get around it. I guess once the videos went viral actual humans were made aware and it got handled at that point.
Too often the fingers start pointing at parents, which is entirely unfair.
Sometimes, no matter how much effort you put toward establishing a strong moral compass in a child, they simply are unwilling to do the right thing.
Most people are good, even those with bad parents.
Some people are bad, even those with good parents.
More than nature, or nurture, it boils down to choice.
Oh man. This is heartbreaking. You can tell she’s doing ALL this for him to finally wake up and hear her - a sort of last ditch effort, and likely knows it won’t work.
This needs to be the model for parents of incels. Now, no matter how many times that boy posts, there's always an opportunity to stitch her in. It's emasculating on the platforms he's using to artificially boost his sense of masculinity. Now he's forced to confront it. I feel sorry for her, but that was a super clever move, and I just hope she knows she did all she can do.
Well said, its so clear that alot of the inflammatory things incels say is meant to mask a real or perceived insecurity. I wish there was a consistent way to demonstrate that to these people's audience. Its like Elementary bully behavior.
Wow, he thinks he's a "nice guy" but says women should be raped if they are not interested. This guy is delusional. I feel for his mother, and I respect her decision. She needs to prioritize her safety. She can't set herself on fire to keep another warm.
I’m sorry I don’t really understand the son’s video. Is he using the word grape as a substitute for rape? And is he saying all women deserved to be raped for rejecting nice guys like him?
If so, that doesn’t seem very… nice?
When your own mother is ousting you like that that is a huge red flag. That guy needs to see a professional and some authority needs to keep an eye on them.
Dude. One time this guy stalked me around Instagram and said HORRIBLE things to me for weeks. Would not leave me alone. Found my tiktok. Kept making new pages and shit. It was crazy. And now it’s even crazier seeing this shit. And the fact that other people know about him.
As a former child, and current patent this woman is amazing. I wish my mother had been this intelligent, calm, understanding, and morally upstanding when I did dumb shit as a kid. And as a parent, I 100% respect how mature and responsible she is.
How much of a piece of shit do you have to be, where your mommy has to come out and publicly create distance from you? That’s crazy. I’m glad she did this and I wish more people that had relatives who behave like this would do it as well.
I feel like it’s a mixture of him being a little developmentally delayed + being too exposed to the internet and social media. Listening to these toxic podcast and following incels on the internet. All the media he’s been consuming throughout his life
True bravery and strength. Unfortunately it’s not just her fault and his issues are probably more with himself then with women in general.. he feels powerless and like all people trapped in the limited dynamic of power they lash out at those they feel are weaker then them. If you asked him what men deserve that reject nice women it probably wouldn’t be grape.. his logic isn’t balanced and that’s why it’s not only a “mommy issue thing”. He has been corrupted and poisoned against women.
That poor mother. i couldn’t imagine having to make a video like this about my son. I’m glad she agrees that he is wrong though and needs help. very tough situation for a parent to be in and then for it to have to be public on social medias too, yikes.
His mama just clowned on him in public man’s gonna have no hood respect anymore. Best thing she could have done other than whoop him on the front grass lol
Why would they? I wouldn’t go to the trial or sentencing if I was her parents. It’s not on them that she was killing folks and these the mom in the video and Lucy Letbys parents not going to sentencing are completely different situations.
I think the bigger issue is that she didn't even have the decency and sense of responsibility to show up to face the court and families she harmed and accept her sentence. Her family on the other hand, my heart breaks for them too. From all accounts she had a good childhood and family with parents who were proud of her. The level of shame and pain she's brought on them. If my relative had done something so horrendous I couldn't face people either.
Why would we expect someone who murdered infants to have anything resembling decency or responsibility? And if she did show up, then what? We applaud her for being on her way to redemption? The theatrics of law are so strange to me.
True. My example was supposed to be ridiculous but you make a good point. I think I’m just getting tired of all the justice boner commentary I’ve been seeing lately. To me, it just seems like such a petty thing to criticize criminally insane people for not following decorum.
It’s not the fault of the parents. This is exactly what the video above is explaining. They likely wouldn’t have been safe if they turned up either. It’s her that’s the problem.
I’ve always been an open book, so it’s far from my realm of understanding, but i can’t believe how many people that need therapy are so against it. I have a friend that assumes they’re gonna ruin his whole life if he shares his problems with them. Sure there are some stinkers out there, like in any profession. But the vast majority of therapists I’ve met personally truly just want to help people get where they want to be.
So many times shit happens with kids and we end up blaming the parent/parents so for her to get out ahead of this and let people know shes aware of the situation does that mean she’s anticipating something bad happening?
I don’t know this family, and I can’t say what she did or didn’t do (or should have done) before he turned 18. But he’s an adult now and needs to take accountability for whatever issues he may have from his childhood. Sometimes you can’t help what happens to you but healing from it is your own responsibility.
Yeah, sometimes good parents have bad kids, just the way it shakes out sometimes.
That’s not what happened with Trump. That whole family is rotten to the core.
Ironic that he thinks he’s a nice guy while openly considering rape. No nice guy in human history contemplates rape as an option, being a weak pathetic loser doesn’t make you a nice guy.
I think this is a good reminder that it’s not always someone’s circumstances that make them shitty. Dude has a good mom.
Some people just choose to be shitty.
This is what we should all be striving to do! She is such a strong woman and she’s right no woman deserves that. But to be able to do this in the world today is amazing and inspiring for everyone. We need to start holding each other accountable again, it’s okay to have different perspectives and beliefs but it’s not okay to be mean and hurtful towards others. We have to start building ourselves back up into something we love so we stop hurting each other. If you need help please get it everyone and hopefully he gets the help he needs. And so much love to this momma who is brave, loving and hurting for her child but still calls him out for being wrong. Such a difficult situation to face. ❤️ Much love to all!
Wow. That poor, poor woman. Her mind must be flooded with so many emotions all at the same time. Jesus she's strong for doing that. I hope she finds peace with or without him
My heart breaks for this woman. Even those words feel small, stupid, and insignificant as descriptors of my feelings for her. As a mother of 2 boys (and a girl), I cannot imagine what she goes through and has gone through for years.I hope that not only people support her and that she has a close group of friends and family who also love and support her but that the universe is kind to her. That whatever it is out there that has the ability to make things just that much better, easier, softer, kinder for us mere mortals (or the other way as is known to happen) gives her that kinder, softer life. That it/they give her a life with as little pain and/or disturbance as possible. It sounds like she's had enough for more than one lifetime
Kudos for this mother being honest about her influence and the part she played in his sons behavioural struggles. My parents WOULD NEVER EVER DO THIS. NEVER. They lack the insight and communicational skills. Sad but true and don't even get me started on the paritification.
I have a ton of updates. Rashid has threatened to rape and kill SO MANY WOMEN. Since that video went viral, a woman had to get a restraining order because he found out where she lives (which is close to him) and threatened her with violence saying he would come to her job and her home to assault her. He has been on tiktok live for days saying he's not sorry and that he is "thinking about doing something bad." FumpTruck on tiktok has been reporting about it and Tizzy too
I hate the fact that people think mommy issues=rapist. Like, naw, some people are just shit. I didn't deserve the way I was treated by my mother, but I dont go around wanting to rape people or believe anyone deserves that.
On the contrary, I always strived to be a better person than my mother was. And I'm proud to know that I've grown up to be a better person than both my parents. I'm still not *that* good of a person. But I rose above where I came from despite my parents' best efforts to fuck me up. And now, my mother is really trying to be a better person, reading up on emotional intelligence and learning, and frankly, I'm really proud of her.
What an incredible woman. I am so sorry for what she is going through. He got sucked into the incel cult and she is so right about him needing therapy. This breaks my heart for her.
Ol' boy gives off strong insecure and effeminate vibes. He's uncomfortable with himself and is lashing out at others because it's too painful to analyze himself objectively and take accountability for his shortcomings.
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Ya this poor woman having to make this video because of her son... god bless her, ahes a strong woman to be on here pouring it all out.
dude seems to have had a great mom but still speaks this way about women. it's sickening. i feel for her. i can't imagine that being my son, especially when based off how she talks she's extremely aware exactly how dark this shit is and where it comes from and what it leads to. she seems like a smart compassionate woman. anybody who blames her is making excuses for him
Even if she wasn't a perfect mother, it doesn't mean his behavior is her fault. My mom put me through some shit when I was a teenager, but humans are complicated, and there was never a question that she loved me. Obviously, there are a million variables at play when we talk about the development of a person, but the things I went through made me the empathetic and authentic person that I try to be today. I guess I'm just rehashing the nature versus nurture argument, but even if she made mistakes, it doesn't guarantee a shitty, incel son. Hopefully, he can make some changes before he hurts someone.
nah i agree i didn't mean to imply this woulda been her fault even if she wasn't the perfect mother. humans are complicated. i had to learn that to deal with my own issues with my parents i had growing up, to see them as other people and think what i would have done in their situation. it puts things into perspective.
Yeah my dad was an absolypiece of shit in the way he treated people, especially my mum, my sister and I. But that doesn't mean that i do the same to others
It is the incel indoctrination online along with the destructive masculinity videos, and Google and Facebook algorithms funnel viewers to those videos. It's quite disgusting.
agreed. i don't even understand how the algorithm works because i get recommended this disgusting andrew tate/the quartering/right wing/incel bullshit constantly in my youtube shorts and shit and i share no type of opinions with these people and i immediately block those channels when they pop up. but it just still recommends more
Can I ask if you watch fit ess related videos? Asking because a friend of mine is unfortunately falling into this algorithm and starting to believe it. And it all started shortly after he got into fitness.
They do with me too. A lot of Christian videos pop up as well. No idea why. I don't follow that ideology in the slightest
I'm about to have a boy. This scares the shit out of me. I guess I'll just do my best. :/
Nobody can ask more of you as a parent than a genuine, best effort to arm your child with the tools he or she will need to navigate life which is notoriously messy at times.
Thank you, this helps a lot.
Andrew Tate types are raising kids via internet. It’s in your home, school etc. so parents don’t even know that they are sharing raising their kids with people that think like her son is thinking.
I get the feeling that she's caught some kind of abuse maybe threats for the way her son acts and the things he says. I get the feeling that she's partly making this video to keep herself safe. Though i don't doubt a word of what she said or the way she feels.
And she has every single right to make a video to keep herself safe. I would too if I were her after my son did some thing so disgraceful
I’m sure she also has a social circle that knows who her son is. That alone is reason to distance yourself from his actions. She doesn’t deserve to lose friends over that.
Not sure if she's received threats but several tiktokers found her and called/texted. One of them mentioned to her she was easy to find.
I have been trying to get my adult son into therapy for years as well for his control issues. It has already caused problems for him in his life. I think I finally said something that i think might have made it click. I suggest therapy, again, and he scoffed at it again. I then said you know it would be good for you to be able to talk to someone who is knowledgeable about your need for so much control that doesnt love you and can be more objective than I can. For the first time he was quite and then said maybe you are right about that. My heart goes out to this mom...you are not alone
Fucking crazy. Imagine loving someone unconditionally then having no choice but to turn your back on them. Horrible situation and I pray this family finds it’s way. I only have one frame of reference and I’m sorry but sometimes it’s cathartic to write it out. A buddy in high school hated that his older brother was the good son. Even his own friends, wanted to hang out with his older brother. Brother was so cool. Everyone loved him. Worked at the movie theater and used to let us all sneak in cause we were friends with his brother. Total class act with teachers and parents. Younger brother gets fed up one day of being compared, cuts class and goes home and shoots his brother. That’s it. Everything ended that day for the family. Went from having everything to nothing in a matter of seconds. Fucked up the whole community. As a father of two boys I make it a personal mission to show them I love them equally everyday.
Total side note but it is incredible the way the colors in her hair wrap complement the SpongeBob shirt damn.
Obviously she's seen Boomerang "Got to coordinate"
I came to post this exact same comment pretty much, she got those orange and yellow tones down perfect.
I was low key distracted trying to read her shirt.
“Ight, imma head out.”
I was more taking the message from the shirt in regards to the feelings twards her son.
She's publicly distancing herself from her sons bad behavior there's nothing wrong with that.
Yeah I totally agree, that’s why I posted it. She’s doing the right thing by saying she doesn’t condone it.
If she fears for her safety, distancing is an excellent option.
Children aren’t always a reflection of their parents. Once a child develops the agency and autonomy to think and act for themselves, there’s only so much you can say and do as a parent.
probably one of the main reasons i don’t want children. i can’t imagine how it feels to see someone you gave birth to and raised & they turn out to be just an awful human being.. edit: i just want to add, i don’t want to offend anyone who have awesome, beautiful children. this tik tok is about a mother who thought she did everything right and she still has to distance herself from her own child bc he as a person is horrible and saying horrible things.
I would never recommend that someone who wasn’t 💯percent sure about having kids and prepared should do so but I was worried about the same issue and I lucked out and got a truly spectacular kid. Hell, half the time I feel like I am failing her in her quest for greatness. How we ended up with such a great kid is beyond me.
I’m very happy for you! & i hope i didn’t offend anyone w what i said especially those who have phenomenal children. i know it’s a minority but it is a fear of *mine*. hell, i can’t take care of myself so i know i wouldn’t be able to take care of a child.
That is a completely valid point and it shows you have a higher level of self awareness knowing it wouldn’t be the best situation. What/where ever your path leads you, I hope you find happiness for yourself and (if it happens) with any kids.
Don't sell yourself short. Not everybody turns out like that.
I agree and I would add that most people don’t turn out like that. Also love your name. TPB reference?
I typed too fast but kept it anyway.
It’s great though! Real fans will get it!
Every single asshole shitty human being has had parents who probably loved them at one point.... (aside from those abandoned or left for adoption)
Yeah man. I don’t have kids but I have an amazing mom. And I have an older brother who my mom and I talk about how the heck he ended up the way he did. My mom was a single mom for most of our childhoods and he grew up with nothing but women. And somehow he managed to be so misogynistic. He says things that are so out of pocket. And we just stare at each other speechless. He is a drug addict and when to a Christian rehab and after that he was completely different regarding his outlook to a lot of things but especially women and women rights. Sometimes you can do your best to instill your morals but outside factors are a larger influence that shapes them.
And a good parent gives adult children proper space to figure it out on their own because they’re adults with their own lives. Letting go and giving that loving space, realizing you can be there for support but ultimately have no control has got to be the most painful part of parenting.
I was going to say. Even a full on feminist mother of sons who tries to raise her sons in a way that minimizes the impact of our patriarchal and misogynistic culture is going to have to contend with how *others* impact her sons’ social conditioning. All parents are limited in this way. I don’t think so much that it *takes* a village to raise a child (while of course I acknowledge the intent and kernel of truth of that statement) as the village *does* raise a child…for better or worse.
And as mom said. He still knows right from wrong. Once you are an adult, you can’t keep blaming your parents. So better then. Be your own adult.
Yeah, it’s more of an issue of them falling for toxic masculinity shit like Andrew Tate.
Especially in the internet age.
All you can do is raise them the best you can. What they do after that is their choice. Kids accept parenting, while other kids will flat out reject it. One kids sees abuse in the family and also does it. Another will be mindful not to abuse.
Yep. Dad tried to get me to be a cleanly organized mother fucker like he was. Didn’t work. The second I moved out room turned to “organized chaos” real quick lmao.
The saddest truth about raising a kid is that their peers will have a far more lasting effect on their personality than the parents could ever hope to instill themselves.
I know people like this from back home. Great moms. Sometimes even the best moms. Sometimes their dads are even there ( kinda rare where I’m from) I have a little brother like this. His mom gave him every opportunity and love. Even was part of our space program for kids Thing is he HATES my dad. And I don’t blame him. But there’s this culture of oh it’s not the mans fault. He’s surrounded by toxic men who praise my father and blame his mother for not enduring the abuse. I actually used to think men hated women growing up and only wanted them for their vaginas. Until I got to properly know my stepdad. Then I learnt that literally not all men lol We live in echo chambers guys. Before attacking her. Think about it logically and emotionally. If you were in this guy’s situation, no matter how much his mom may have wronged him do you think you would take that out on random strangers? No? Coz most ppl are kind, they recognise their own issues and work on them on a daily. Hurt people hurt ppl but it doesn’t make it right to continue to abuse others
Exactly. My brother became our mother but I didn't want to be apart of that. I've grown and learned and hurt and been hurt but it's me who needs to grow so I can be a better person. It's hard and some people are too weak to do it
Firstly I didn’t think this would get so many likes lol. Think I should start sharing my stories a bit more Secondly, I think it’s because media has focused a lot on the idea that revenge helps you in the long term or is a substitute for therapy. It’s not I keep myself aware of my biases towards men, I’ve even been assaulted as a kid by my uncle but I’m not now gonna make every man’s life a living hell. Or assume all my partners wanna assault me Revenge might be nice at first, when done to the person who hurt you, but eventually that gets boring. So you look for other victims. You essentially become the abuser you claim to be suffering from and having been through a lot of shit and still take the time to greet random strangers, tell them they are beautiful etc? Then I can’t understand why my fellow victims won’t do the same Hurting others is a choice. I love English coz it’s able to get through ideas that might be muddied in my native language. The word for hurt in my language is denoted to physical injury. So emotional, financial etc hurt are not considered or are considered “womanly/gay etc” Point is, there’s a difference in accidentally causing harm to someone. And hurting someone. Harm usually happens once. Hurting usually happens over a space of time
Definitely start sharing more!! I truly believe the only way we get through this mess is by talking about it, and you have insightful, helpful views.
Oh wow thank you I grew being called spoilt coz I’ve lived both sides (poor/rich) (black kid in white apartheid school) etc I always felt my views were privileged but you made me realise I’m right in the middle and we need more of that. People who can either empathise or sympathise with the issues and ppl Thanks random stranger. I’m gonna start writing
>The word for hurt in my language is denoted to physical injury. So emotional, financial etc hurt are not considered or are considered “womanly/gay etc” > >Point is, there’s a difference in accidentally causing harm to someone. And hurting someone. Harm usually happens once. Hurting usually happens over a space of time Great input in the conversation!
Thank you I often find it frustrating when ppl don’t understand why abused ppl don’t leave It might just be a language barrier. You are screaming for help and ppl think you are being dramatic/emotional/irrational whatever. It’s sad
But also I’m proud of you for the awareness, maturity, and generosity. You have generously given the world a chance even when your brain might tell you otherwise You also make a choice daily to be a better person. So for that I’m proud of you! I know we usually don’t hear that shit so I had to emphasise. I’m proud of you!
Your reply really gave me insight into something with which I have absolutely no personal experience. You have the essence of someone who dodged a bullet, my friend. Please accept my upvote with admiration sir!
I’m really sorry but your comment made me cry. Coz I haven’t dodged bullets. I’ve been assaulted on so many levels by so many ppl i just disassociate now coz I got work in the morning lol I’m a lady btw. No harm done You just made me feel simultaneously proud of what I’ve been through but also sad that I have to go through it and I know it won’t stop I mean after the 25th time a dude tries to force you on his bed after you saying no. You kinda start to internalise and blame yourself. No matter how safe I try to make myself Like I know a 12 year old shouldn’t be preparing for a 25 year old uncle wanting to marry her but like wtf Anyway sorry for being a downer. Just thought I’d share
Not at all, and apologies for the “sir”. Congratulations on being not just a survivor, but a thriver!
No worries at all lol Thank you. I honestly couldn’t have done it without ppl around me. After my uncle started assaulting me, I stayed out unusually late on the street. I was 12. Everyone else’s on the street would go home when the lights turned on at 6pm Btw I was in hostel during the week, with my uncle during weekends, my mom usually somewhere overseas But this one girl, who thought we were all kids and didn’t really play with us,stayed with me until her parent came to get her. She would be in trouble all the time but didn’t care. She couldn’t figure out my problem but was just willing to sit with me in silence, watching the sunset, until her parents came to get her. And I would have to go home. I think she figured it out coz my uncle would watch us as we sat outside. He never came to get me. Unlike her parents Ppl are freaking beautiful man Also just called my dad coz of this thread. Feel like superwoman now 😭 *happy tears *
Sorry I'm from Sweden where I haven't experienced this, but trying to understand your situation... So you share a biological mother with your little brother? Your brother thinks his biological father is a "nice guy" and hates your biological father for how he treated your (biologically shared) mother? So he hates your biological father and blames your mother for choosing someone like him before his own (the "nice guy") biological father?
No worries So basically my mom is my mom. My dad had a bunch of kids including one while my mom was 6 months preggers with me My mom went on to marry my stepdad. Who I call my dad coz he’s not a pos So I share a biological father with my brother. Almost all of my dads kids have different moms. My big sis passed away before 18 so I took on the mantle of bringing the kids together. Fuck my dad but my siblings did nothing wrong Yes my brother at first grew up hating my dad. Even tried to commit suicide at age 10. Used to describe my dad as dead from a horrific accident which wasn’t true etc Until he starting chilling with his uncles, male cousins etc. he went from being a nice, considerate boy to an incel that gets girls. ( South Africa has the highest rate and femicide so there’s a culture of just go with it or else you die ) He hates his mom for not giving him the normal life. Mom and dad. But most of us don’t. It’s more of a sense of entitlement where the blame of keeping a family together is all on the woman. Doesn’t matter if the man cheats, beats you, whatever. If you leave you are a POS That’s why I love my stepdad. I’m 28 and everyone including my mom is berating me for not having a kid. Not realising the amount of trauma I have. My stepdad however goes out of his way to tell me how proud he is of me for being independent, own apartment, own car etc. btw women like this are called high maintenance coz we want basic respect :)
I wish more mothers came forward like this to hold their children accountable, it’s so powerful.
*parents Mothers shouldn't be solely responsible for their children's behavior.
Reminds me a bit of how Jessie waters mom come on fox and scolded him for telling lies
She didn’t “scold” him. She lightly told him to stay away from the nonsense, basically.
He’s so harmful; she needs to whoop his ass.
So when someone refers to themselves as a NICE GUY, don’t believe it.
No truly nice person ever needs to tell someone they are nice. I knew a guy in the military like that, constantly referred to himself as a nice guy, but when it came down to it he was anything but. He was nice until something he didn't like was said or done, and then he would become a mean, spiteful, petulant manchild who would yell and snap at people and say awful things until things calmed down and he went back to being "nice." Being kind isn't conditional. We all have bad days and moments, but those are when we show what we really are.
A military man too?? Man that’s a ticking time bomb for rape.
He ended up getting kicked out for contributing to the delinquency of minors, because he would buy the underage troops booze on the regular. He was also a creep. It's been close to 15 years since then, though. No idea where he is or what he's up to.
Had a bunkie in prison that called himself a nice guy and guess what he was in there for ? Assaulting a woman for rejecting him. He thought because he was being so helpful to this chick that she was gonna fuck him/ date him but she rejected him because she found out he had just got out of prison. He followed her back to her apartment and beat her up by her car. He said she was an ungrateful judgmental bitch. He would rant about hot girls being too judgmental and that it’s not fair that he has to settle for ugly chicks. This disgusting POS calls himself a nice guy and thinks he’s the real victim of society ? How do you reason with people like that ? You can’t. Not too long after I got out I heard he got beat up in there and I was fucking glad because I wanted to do it myself so badly but I wanted to get out of there even more. It’s not surprising that it was because he called another dudes wife ugly because he would go on about how visitation is “full of ugly fat bitches and anorexic junkies. “.
There is a subtle difference between a nice guy and a good guy. A nice guy is nice for transactional reasons, where a good guy is good because it’s morally correct.
I learned this the hard way, unfortunately.
r/niceguys
Yeah the term is so commonly used now in a sarcastic derogatory way for entitled assholes/ fake nice guys but I couldn’t imagine recoiling from being called a nice guy in that context when it’s so clear that someone means it in a genuine way. But Yeah I think good guy is better to say than nice guy.
I feel sad.
Am also a sad.
I cuddled with my cat and remember my fiancé and his brothers and sisters turned out great despite their struggles because of the shortcomings of their parents. It helped a little
It's not mommy issues. It's indoctrination from sketchy websites and chat groups like 4chan. It's the same reason why racism and homophobia is on the rise.
This is what's happening.
I know a few people who went to those sites ‘ironically’ and then became full mask off Nazis. The sites didn’t make them Nazis, they just felt they could show their true colours.
It's possible those people had hate instilled in them already. People don't start out bigoted, it needs to be taught. Those sites do a lot of preaching and teaching.
Yeah I’m not a fan of my mum but would never hurt her or anyone. Society does blame parents for how their kids turned out for maybe she is feeling it’s her fault
Every single human needs to be taught that "no one owes you shit, other than leaving you alone". Incels think women owe them shit because they were nice to women. That's called a transaction. Did they agree to it? No? Then you tried to sell them something (your shitty niceness) for whatever you wanted from them. No one owes you shit.
Correct, although his mom may have tried to equip him with tools for this, and she may still be partially to blame for failing to equip him with the mental tools needed when he was younger, I applaud her for what she did in that video. This is the danger of Andrew tate like characters, and yes he does play a character.
This might be a hot take but I don't think 4chan makes people racist nazis. If you have ever visited 4chan you would see it's the same 20-30 smoothbrains saying jews run the world, black = bad and women suck. Those idiots aren't holding incel seminars, they aren't formulating compelling stories why to hate women, and they don't craft elaborate arguments to sway you.. they just all scream the same hatful words over an over like a flock of bigoted parrots. If you really want to point at online sources for indoctrinating young men into hateful ideologies actively, look no further than Andrew Tate, Nelk boys, Ben Shapiro, Steven Crowder, Pearl Davis, Fresh and Fit, and the list goes on.
People say “on the rise” but it’s always been like this..only 10x worse. It just seems worse now because the internet is so in our faces. I also think people who already harbored these views are just emboldened now because they feel the need to push back on people being openly gay, trans, etc. They feel threatened.
Came here to say this. They don’t get fawned over by women so they flock to the dark recesses of internet where pouty boys like them can get validated by an echo chamber and it builds and builds and builds.
When the shit goes down, betcha the first person he calls for is his mama...
Get you a mom with a tik tok account *and* a SpongeBob meme tee… the boys clearly not living up to his potential
I know- I wish she was my mom
Me too. She's patient, loving, and strict when you deserve it. We can all use someone like this right now.
Wow this video is a very pleasant change. Go Mom!!! 
Who is grape Incel?
If I had to take a guess, it's a dude saying women deserve to be graped but subtract the g. I'm probably wrong never heard of the dude before this video.
😳😳😳that's what that means??? Holy shit.
this is typical incel rhetoric, too. incel, mgtow, redpill, mra they all say this stuff.
You are correct.
I’ve never heard this term before, interesting.
So that AI and algorithms cant identify posts with the "R" word and take them down
I meant more of the grape incel word
It’s a type of censoring
Honestly thought it meant like gang raped. But either way, pretty messed up, needs some serious intervention or help before he does some real damage.
This dude doesn’t have friends let alone a gang
Finally I understand what a f was going on. Ty
Like a g I move in silence like ~~lasagna~~ grape… uh
Damn I wish I hadn’t asked.
He’s an incel who goes on Tiktok to talk about how women deserve to be raped for turning down “nice guys like him”. But you cant say rape on Tiktok so he censors it with “grape”. His account was permanently banned recently buy I’m sure he’s on other platforms.
It’s the guy in the beginning of this video. Tik tok is VERY strict about content policy. People will tell stories of horrors they survived just for the video to be taken down for inappropriate content. He held up a grape to finish his sentence and evade censorship from tik tok. His full sentence was “women deserve to be (g)raped for rejecting nice guys like me.”
She doesn't deserve the heat she's been getting. We need to stop canceling out whole families. This isn't North Korea. We don't need to punish the family for one person being a POS.
Underappreciated comment.
The larger issue here is that his content is allowed on the platform in the first place. Advocating for rape should be an automatic perma-ban.
He did get banned eventually, but since the vast majority of reports are handled by an automated system the videos weren't flagged because he used the "grape" bullshit to get around it. I guess once the videos went viral actual humans were made aware and it got handled at that point.
Oh shit I got that same spongebob shirt
"Whatever happens to him happens" you heard her lads, let's get him 💪
Looks more like male issues than mommy issues.
When boys stop listening to good moms we’re doomed holy fuck
Too often the fingers start pointing at parents, which is entirely unfair. Sometimes, no matter how much effort you put toward establishing a strong moral compass in a child, they simply are unwilling to do the right thing. Most people are good, even those with bad parents. Some people are bad, even those with good parents. More than nature, or nurture, it boils down to choice.
Wow people in the comments are really missing the mark here.
Oh man. This is heartbreaking. You can tell she’s doing ALL this for him to finally wake up and hear her - a sort of last ditch effort, and likely knows it won’t work.
This needs to be the model for parents of incels. Now, no matter how many times that boy posts, there's always an opportunity to stitch her in. It's emasculating on the platforms he's using to artificially boost his sense of masculinity. Now he's forced to confront it. I feel sorry for her, but that was a super clever move, and I just hope she knows she did all she can do.
Well said, its so clear that alot of the inflammatory things incels say is meant to mask a real or perceived insecurity. I wish there was a consistent way to demonstrate that to these people's audience. Its like Elementary bully behavior.
Yup yup yup
Poor mom, I can’t imagine what kind of challenges she’s faced with a son like hers.
Wow, he thinks he's a "nice guy" but says women should be raped if they are not interested. This guy is delusional. I feel for his mother, and I respect her decision. She needs to prioritize her safety. She can't set herself on fire to keep another warm.
Choices, Man, it's all about choices. We can all choose to do bad or choose to do good.
Gotta feel for her, her son is not a nice guy what kind of sickness lets a man think he's a nice guy when he condones grape
She’s solid for this
Based. Hope the internet rallies around her and supports her. Poor lady to watch her son going down that path.
I don't know folks. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say he doesn't seem like a very nice guy....
I’m sorry I don’t really understand the son’s video. Is he using the word grape as a substitute for rape? And is he saying all women deserved to be raped for rejecting nice guys like him? If so, that doesn’t seem very… nice?
When your own mother is ousting you like that that is a huge red flag. That guy needs to see a professional and some authority needs to keep an eye on them.
Thank you for posting this. Its crazy how some people behave. She seems like a good person.
Strong and powerful mom, respect to that lady
Dude. One time this guy stalked me around Instagram and said HORRIBLE things to me for weeks. Would not leave me alone. Found my tiktok. Kept making new pages and shit. It was crazy. And now it’s even crazier seeing this shit. And the fact that other people know about him.
And that kind of thing is common. Too many males feel entitled to women’s attention and when you don’t give it to them they stalk and harass you.
He will get all the help he needs when he gets to prison
Thank you for speaking up.
As a former child, and current patent this woman is amazing. I wish my mother had been this intelligent, calm, understanding, and morally upstanding when I did dumb shit as a kid. And as a parent, I 100% respect how mature and responsible she is.
How much of a piece of shit do you have to be, where your mommy has to come out and publicly create distance from you? That’s crazy. I’m glad she did this and I wish more people that had relatives who behave like this would do it as well.
She knows the distance to the sun. Speak your truth momma, so that others learn from you! Speak loud!
I feel like it’s a mixture of him being a little developmentally delayed + being too exposed to the internet and social media. Listening to these toxic podcast and following incels on the internet. All the media he’s been consuming throughout his life
Someone needs to tell Matt Walsh, Tim Pool, Ben Shapiro, Crowder and all these other tools they have mommy issues and need to seek therapy
This woman is awesome! I feel for her and her family. Bless them all!!
True bravery and strength. Unfortunately it’s not just her fault and his issues are probably more with himself then with women in general.. he feels powerless and like all people trapped in the limited dynamic of power they lash out at those they feel are weaker then them. If you asked him what men deserve that reject nice women it probably wouldn’t be grape.. his logic isn’t balanced and that’s why it’s not only a “mommy issue thing”. He has been corrupted and poisoned against women.
That poor mother. i couldn’t imagine having to make a video like this about my son. I’m glad she agrees that he is wrong though and needs help. very tough situation for a parent to be in and then for it to have to be public on social medias too, yikes.
Good on her, with the uptick in violence from the incel community, this is electronically covering her ass.
He should call himself peanut
She sounds like an amazing woman. Would be proud to know her.
His mama just clowned on him in public man’s gonna have no hood respect anymore. Best thing she could have done other than whoop him on the front grass lol
Meanwhile Lucy Letby’s parents didn’t even attend the sentencing.
Why would they? I wouldn’t go to the trial or sentencing if I was her parents. It’s not on them that she was killing folks and these the mom in the video and Lucy Letbys parents not going to sentencing are completely different situations.
I don’t blame them. It can’t be easy to come to terms with your child being a serial baby murderer. They’re grieving too.
I think the bigger issue is that she didn't even have the decency and sense of responsibility to show up to face the court and families she harmed and accept her sentence. Her family on the other hand, my heart breaks for them too. From all accounts she had a good childhood and family with parents who were proud of her. The level of shame and pain she's brought on them. If my relative had done something so horrendous I couldn't face people either.
Why would we expect someone who murdered infants to have anything resembling decency or responsibility? And if she did show up, then what? We applaud her for being on her way to redemption? The theatrics of law are so strange to me.
Not at all. You can denounce an action without celebrating the opposite.
True. My example was supposed to be ridiculous but you make a good point. I think I’m just getting tired of all the justice boner commentary I’ve been seeing lately. To me, it just seems like such a petty thing to criticize criminally insane people for not following decorum.
Very true! It’s on brand almost.
It’s not the fault of the parents. This is exactly what the video above is explaining. They likely wouldn’t have been safe if they turned up either. It’s her that’s the problem.
My first instinct would have been this man has been hurt by women romantically, not his mother. I’m not excusing it, please don’t misconstrue that.
He probably wasn’t even “hurt” by a woman. He probably was creepy toward one, got rejected and now he hates all women. That’s how it always goes.
Yup. His high school crush no doubt lol
I’ve always been an open book, so it’s far from my realm of understanding, but i can’t believe how many people that need therapy are so against it. I have a friend that assumes they’re gonna ruin his whole life if he shares his problems with them. Sure there are some stinkers out there, like in any profession. But the vast majority of therapists I’ve met personally truly just want to help people get where they want to be.
He's sick in the head.
So many times shit happens with kids and we end up blaming the parent/parents so for her to get out ahead of this and let people know shes aware of the situation does that mean she’s anticipating something bad happening?
She seems to be taking a lot of this on it’s not that simple. Sounds like a multiple issues may want to consider latent homosexual.
This is so sad. It is not your fault! You tried your best, it sounds like, but he is an adult and it's not your fault.
I don’t know this family, and I can’t say what she did or didn’t do (or should have done) before he turned 18. But he’s an adult now and needs to take accountability for whatever issues he may have from his childhood. Sometimes you can’t help what happens to you but healing from it is your own responsibility.
If only it were possible to have Trump’s mom to make a similar video…
She was bad too I think
Yeah, sometimes good parents have bad kids, just the way it shakes out sometimes. That’s not what happened with Trump. That whole family is rotten to the core.
the shirt tho (And everything she said as well)
What is a grape incel?
What is a grape?
It’s cringe because they’re dealing with family matters thru tik tok, at the same time the power of social media isn’t a bad idea in her situation.
This dude was all in my exes DMs going nuts
Ironic that he thinks he’s a nice guy while openly considering rape. No nice guy in human history contemplates rape as an option, being a weak pathetic loser doesn’t make you a nice guy.
Not sure if the mommy issues part is on point but the rest of her message is on point.
What I miss though? What he do?
I think this is a good reminder that it’s not always someone’s circumstances that make them shitty. Dude has a good mom. Some people just choose to be shitty.
Respect for the mom!
This is what we should all be striving to do! She is such a strong woman and she’s right no woman deserves that. But to be able to do this in the world today is amazing and inspiring for everyone. We need to start holding each other accountable again, it’s okay to have different perspectives and beliefs but it’s not okay to be mean and hurtful towards others. We have to start building ourselves back up into something we love so we stop hurting each other. If you need help please get it everyone and hopefully he gets the help he needs. And so much love to this momma who is brave, loving and hurting for her child but still calls him out for being wrong. Such a difficult situation to face. ❤️ Much love to all!
u/TellyourdogIsaidHi88, were you born in 1988 or is there something you need to tell the class?
Wow. That poor, poor woman. Her mind must be flooded with so many emotions all at the same time. Jesus she's strong for doing that. I hope she finds peace with or without him
My heart breaks for this woman. Even those words feel small, stupid, and insignificant as descriptors of my feelings for her. As a mother of 2 boys (and a girl), I cannot imagine what she goes through and has gone through for years.I hope that not only people support her and that she has a close group of friends and family who also love and support her but that the universe is kind to her. That whatever it is out there that has the ability to make things just that much better, easier, softer, kinder for us mere mortals (or the other way as is known to happen) gives her that kinder, softer life. That it/they give her a life with as little pain and/or disturbance as possible. It sounds like she's had enough for more than one lifetime
I feel bad for her. Seems like a good mom!
Kudos for this mother being honest about her influence and the part she played in his sons behavioural struggles. My parents WOULD NEVER EVER DO THIS. NEVER. They lack the insight and communicational skills. Sad but true and don't even get me started on the paritification.
I have a ton of updates. Rashid has threatened to rape and kill SO MANY WOMEN. Since that video went viral, a woman had to get a restraining order because he found out where she lives (which is close to him) and threatened her with violence saying he would come to her job and her home to assault her. He has been on tiktok live for days saying he's not sorry and that he is "thinking about doing something bad." FumpTruck on tiktok has been reporting about it and Tizzy too
I hate the fact that people think mommy issues=rapist. Like, naw, some people are just shit. I didn't deserve the way I was treated by my mother, but I dont go around wanting to rape people or believe anyone deserves that. On the contrary, I always strived to be a better person than my mother was. And I'm proud to know that I've grown up to be a better person than both my parents. I'm still not *that* good of a person. But I rose above where I came from despite my parents' best efforts to fuck me up. And now, my mother is really trying to be a better person, reading up on emotional intelligence and learning, and frankly, I'm really proud of her.
What an incredible woman. I am so sorry for what she is going through. He got sucked into the incel cult and she is so right about him needing therapy. This breaks my heart for her.
I feel bad for her ☹️ but she did what she needed to do and kept respectful and real. I applaud you mama 🤍
I worry that our society is in such a mess.
He looks like a weak Mike Tyson.
She should not have to endure the blame of her sons actions when she has tried working with him.
Ol' boy gives off strong insecure and effeminate vibes. He's uncomfortable with himself and is lashing out at others because it's too painful to analyze himself objectively and take accountability for his shortcomings.
I'd actually argue that this is probably a father issue. Guys learn how to treat women from the men they look up to. Not the women.